Haiku Drama World Tour
by chaoticgeek2
Summary: Hatena Haiku is the home of a small community known as the haikuers. As the website dies and the users dwindle, some are invited to a journey around the world in a competition that tests their friendships and their sanity. Two teams, 40 contestants, 1,000,000 stars. Many vibrant locations, mysterious characters, copyrighted characters, jokes non-haikuers won't get, and shit awaits.
1. The Shit Begins

"A home, doesn't have to be...a house.  
And a family, doesn't have to be...related."  
-Cory Baxter

There a building stood. Surrounding it were some trees, the grass felt bright and healthy. The building sat in a secluded area on the edge of town, sitting next to a forest. A small parking lot accompanied it. There was a slight breeze as the first visitor closed the door of his car, holding in his hand an invitation. Marrowsky read the invitation once more to confirm he had the right address. He tightened his badass shades and walked inside. Looking around, he saw no one. He reached into his pocket and pulled out some headphones, take a guess what he did with them. He reach over to his Walkmen, strapped to his belt, and pressed play.  
/PGNU9i0_eIs

Haiku Drama World Tour  
Chapter 1: The Shit Awakens

Marrowsky danced around the empty, dark room. Banging his hands off a table to the rhythm, he picked up a rodent and sang into it as if it was a microphone. Marrowsky twirled around and skipped about, stepping in and splashing spilt water, kicking rodents around. He skid a bit with his slippery shoes before the lights went and his attention was caught, bringing his spiritual dance to a stop. He turned the volume down and turned around to see Sam at the door.

"Sexy as fucking fuck, bro. Dance me a little more Ni!" Sam exclaims.  
"It's nice to see see you too, Sam." Marrowsky replied, holding his hand out for a nice, firm shake.  
"It looks like we're the first to arrive" he said, pointing out the obvious.  
"Who the fuck are you?" asked Sam, giving Marrowsky a tubular fist bump because handshakes are for fucking faggitsZ.

Mr. Moogle walked into the room next, dropping his bags to the floor and extending his arms out in joy.

"kupo!"

"That's our Moogle!" Marrowsky smirked.  
"What the fuck did Moogle Mr. turn Chinese or something" Sam scratched his head.  
"It's good to see you, Sam and Marrowsky." Moogle greeted.  
"What? Marrowsky? Is that really how you pronounce it? I've been pronouncing it as Marrowsky this entire time" Cloud said, walking into the room.  
"I don't even know the correct way" Marrowsky shrugged.  
"Well Marrowsky sounds fucking dumb, like a rat or something. I'm gonna continue to call you Marrowsky" Cloud crossed his arms.  
"Is this the turnout?" Cloud asked, looking around.  
"I guess four isn't too bad for Haikucon, the goal was three" Moogle said.  
"I like Pusey" said Sam.

A sixth person entered the room though! It was Nicholas, who was the size of an Oompa Loompa.

"So you bi*ches actually showed up, huh? This is crazy, we gotta hold hands and masturbate before this ends guys. Oh Cloud is here, cringe" Nihcpls said.  
"Right here buddy" Cloud flashed Nicholas a middle finger with a snarky smile.  
"What is that implying? That you want to stick your finger up my butt hole because you are gay? Well o.o ok Cloud Nine gay" Nicholas responded.

Cloud flew backwards and crashed (and broke because he's a fatass )into a table due to the amount of ownage he got from Nicholas' comment.

Lemon walked into the building next.

"Finally another kike" Cloud said with relief, dusting off his shirt.

"Yeah another kike for you to have gay sex with because you're a dyke" Nicholas said.  
"Look man I am not offended by your hurtful comments I am just a simple boy looking for a good time and don't want to cause any trouble just let me eat some Fritos and chatter amongst my internet friends" Cloud said  
"Goddard Cloud shut the heck up you spoke so long we have to skip Lemon / line now" Moogle complained.

Fang walked up.

"I am Fang" Fang said.

Fang walked over to the tables to eat some snacks.  
DryBones walked in next, wearing a slick backpack.

"皆さん、こんにちは" DryBones greeted.  
"I've been practicing my Japanese."  
"That's pretty cool, DryBones" Lemon said.  
"Thanks Avocado"  
"What"  
"Sorry I was thinking of someone else" DryBones finished, sitting down at a table with Sam.

DaUsername walked into the room.  
"." he said  
"What" Lemon asked, confused.  
"Sorry I was posting filler" he explained.

Right behind DohUsername was Bless, who popped his pants on the spot in an attempt to be funny.

"What" Lemon asked.  
"Lemon you don't have to say what to everything" Mr. Moogle said  
"Hi" Bless said.  
"Ok who sent these invitations because they should have known not to invite Fuc🌵in Bldss" Nicolas sighed.  
"Come on Nick, I don't think Bless is that bad. He's a pretty normal guy just like you and I once you stop looking at the negatives" Lemon argued.  
"Lemon he just pooped himself in an attempt to be funny" Nicholas said.  
"I miss Ziggy" Bless stated.

StarForce appeared next.

"Hey guys c:" he smiled.  
"StarForce my man" Nicholas said, giving him a bro hug.  
"This is gonna be so fun" StarForce exclaimed positively.  
"hi" Bless said.  
"Hey" Robert replied.  
"What the hell, who are you? How long have you been here?" Moogle asked.  
"As the sentence said, my name is Robert. I have been here for awhile."  
"Have you just been standing there and we haven't noticed you?" Marrowsky asked.  
"Yeah" Robert answered.

Element walked in next.  
"Holy shit people actually showed up I thought it was just gonna be Nicholas and Moogle."  
"No..." Bless said.  
"Well whoever is hosting this bash fully paid for all of our trips, that certainly makes the offer easier to accept." Marrowsky said.  
"Yeah laugh out loud my mom doesn't even know I'm meeting friends here she just thinks we're on vacation and I went wandering" Element said.  
"This is retarded let's stop trying to add logic to the meetup it just happened" Cloud suggested.  
"Let's kill Cloud" Nicholas suggested.  
"Heh" someone said.  
"Shinxy? Really? You're attending Haikucon too?" element asked  
"Yeah 3 :3~" Shinxy said.  
"Omg Shinxy you're here now, awesomeness use " Nicholas said.  
"hi uh Peter?" Shinxy greeted.

ToastWolf came in next.  
"Hey frienfs" ToadtWolf Gregg  
"ToatWolf hi I've been wanting to tal to you..." bless blushed  
"Not now Bless I have to find Rhythm" she said, pulling out a map.  
"Never gonna happen. Rhythm's gone." Cloud scoffed, shoving penis in his mouth.  
"Don't let Cloud's gay comments get to you ToastWolf I think you can find Rhythm" Bless said.  
"I think he's either...in California...or...Utah...one of those two..." ToastWolf said, scratching her not beard because girls don't have beards.

Robot was there next.

"Beep beep"

Alice walked in next.

"The boss is here now" she said, putting sunglasses on.  
"That's my thing..." Marrowsky sighed, looking down.

Element scoffed, looking away from Alice, Madorky, Squishward or whatever to face Nicholas and Moogle. Alice didn't come alone, with her was internet superstar GenesisFrenzy aka Riley, holding a phone in his hand he was recording himself walking in.

"Hey guys, GenesisFrenzy here, today I'm going to be doing something a little different. I'm here at Haikucon to meet up with some friends and have a good time! I-"  
"Who the hell is that" ToastWolf asked.  
"He's a friend of Madorky's. He hangs around the Kik chat a lot" Cloud explained.  
"Kik! No!" Nicholas yelled.  
"He's not even a haikuer why should he be here..." Element asked.  
"Beep" Robot said.  
"On the country. I actually do have a Haiku account." Riley said  
"All fairs and love is not war, we should not be mean to Riley he's just looking for a good time" StarForce said.  
"Where is Luke I need someone here who actually cares about me" Riley asked.  
"There's Cloud" Alice said.  
"Me and Cloud have a rocky relationship..." Riley sighed.

[before the time that is now]  
Riley: Cloud the admins of the amiibo chat are trying to get me banned for posting a risqué picture of Lucina, I need you to back me up so they don't ban me. I'm asking you as a friend.  
Riley adds Cloud to the amiibo Kik chat.  
Cloud: Kick him kick him kick him kick him kick him kick him kick him  
[back to the present]

"I'm pretty sure he was just joking" Alice assured him.  
"Hey Riley" Lemon greeted.  
"Oh hey Bless" Riley greeted back.  
"No..." Lemon said.  
"Hey, over here. I'm here now, look over here it's me Stickboy, haha I'm here now I'm in the spotlight haha" Stickboy said  
"Who is this guy that I don't know?" Robert asked.  
"Im fucking Stickboy" Stickboy burped.  
"Hey please watch your language" DryBones asked politely.  
"Great what we need is more of the type of people that familiar with I am not" Robert sighed.

Outside of the building the haikuers could hear some screaming.

"Did you remember to pack your ointmet"  
"Holy shit for the 🍂🐐th time yes shut the fuck up"  
"Be careful now they could be rapists but I don't care enough to check myself"  
"Oh my Arceus you're EMBARRASSING ME get the fuck out of here"  
"Watch your fucking mouth you little piece of shit you got a mouth as bad as your whore of a mother, why don't you go suck some dick and beg for money on the streets like her you worthless pile of trash"  
"Mom what the fuck" GingeraleDragon said, getting out of the car and slamming the door.  
"I love you sweetie have fun and be at the hotel by 6:00 pm" Mama Gingerale said, waving a kiss goodbye.  
"Whatever!" he said, he pushed his glasses up, put his iconic Charizard cap on, and entered the building.  
"Kept you waiting, huh?" Gingerale smirked.  
"Hi GinegraleDragon!" Mike greeted.  
"Mike!" Nicholas said with excitement,  
"Mike's back? I thought he blew up or died or something" ToastWolf noted.  
"Say that again slut and I'll hang you by your intestines and eat out your insides so you hope I did died haha !-.-" Mile threatened.  
"Hey guys I'm here too" GingeraleDragon tried to get a word in.

The next three all walked in together: Blooberri, Pantz, and Sunnia.

"Yo" Pantz said.  
"Pantz? That's cool..." Cloud said to himself, puffing out his coat collar to conceal his blush.  
"Hey Sunnia" Alice greeted, putting a hand out.  
"Uh...hi..." Sunnia said nervously.  
"I'm berri glad to see you guys" Blooberri said.  
"Laugh" said Fang.  
"Whoa, six new boobs have entered the building" Riley said.  
"Kick Riley" Cloud suggested.

Sam went up and kicked Riley in the asshole.

"You like that bitch take it up the ass bro !" Sam laughed, stuffing his knees deep inside Riley's butt.

"No stop the viewers don't want to see me getting my ass kicked!" Riley cried.  
"Yes they do kick him kick him kick him" Cloud said gleefully.

Riley was in pain emotionally and anally.  
Grenade walked in next.

"Hello" Grenade said.  
"Bro!" Sam greeted, running over to pee on him in an assortment of dominance.  
"Thank you" Grenade thanked.  
"Heh, I'd like to pee in Element /" Shinxy said quietly.  
"Shinxy what the fuck man" Element said.  
"Looks like I showed up at an interesting time" Pseudonym said dully.  
"Yo Psudo!" Gingerale said happily.  
"Pseudo." he corrected with a sigh.  
"Well this is a pleasant surprise. But at the same time the humor of the three person party pic subtitled Haikucon has lost its charm"  
"Hey look it's Pseudonym no one cares lol" Stickboy said.  
"Wow thanks I'm gonna go cry from how hurtful that comment was. Nice job destroying me with your powerful words. Your shirt is on backwards by the way." Pseudonym replied nonchalantly.  
"I was doing that ironically" Stickboy rolled his eyes. He then quickly glanced around to see if anyone was looking then ran away to switch his shirt around.  
"I miss Ziggy" Bless said.

Ziggy came.

"Top cute Bless" Ziggy blushed, twiddling his fingers.  
"Ziggy you're here too!" Lemon hugged him.  
"Wow top gay Lemon haha...ha...I'm not gay..." Ziggy said.

Outside giggles from girls could be heard.

"Now now ladies you're distracting me, let me park the car and stop touching my muscles" Rydli pleaded.  
"Sorry Rydli, I just...I just...uhhhhhhhxmsksj" the girl said, moving her body closer to Rydli so her boobs were on his arm.  
"What the heck I can't see with your breasts all over me woman give me some space" Rydli sighed.  
"Rydli can we stop at Burger King I'm hungry" another girl, less hot, from the backseat asked.  
"You should have asked when we passed one 30 minutes ago and when we weren't in a parking lot." Rydli complained, stopping the car and getting out.  
"Rydli I want to have sex with you" another girl said.  
"I'm BUSY Lana, can't you see that? I'm gonna go check up with some friends just wait in the car ok." Rydli commanded.  
"Ok we'll be here making out if you want to join us" one of them said, twirling her hair.  
"Fuck girls I wish I was gay" Rydli sighed as he walked into the building.  
"Riddles you're here!" StarForce said joyously.  
"Sorry I took so long these girls were holding me up" Rydli explained.  
"Wow nice lie Rydli" Ziggy said.  
"Oh you wanna call me a liar?" Rydli asked.  
"He ain't calling you a truther" Blooberri noted.  
"Fellas FELLAS!" StarForce screamed, pushing Rydli and Ziggy away from each other with both his hands.  
"Hey Rydli did you bring the stuff" Nicholas asked.  
"Yeah here it is" Rydli said, giving Nicholas a bag.  
"What was that?" ToastWolf asked  
"Nothing" Rydli said.  
"You brought Nicholas a bag of nothing?" ToastWolf asked.  
"Yes and you have toast in your name some of us do stupid things" Nicholas said

ToastWOLF GRABBED the bag from Nicholas' hand and opened it up. There was nothing in it.

"It was a test and you failed" Rydli said.  
"No..." ToastWolf exclaimed.

The next to show up was Lukeguy.  
He walked into the building. I mean inside that would be silly haha!

"Luke is here, dope" Alice smiled to her friend, the Luke.  
"H-...hi..." he said nervously, looking at the ground.  
"AaaaaAAAAAAAA. AaahHjjjhHhhhhh." Luke's brother said, walking up from behind and dumping a bowl of soup on his head.  
"oh" DaUsername said

Luke's brother punched Luke in the face and pushed him to the ground, slapping his face.

"I told you not to follow me..." Luke muttered under his breath.  
"AAHAHAHAHAAHAH!" Luke's brother took a tire and threw it at Luke's head.

Luke sighed, taking a leash out of his pocket and attaching it to his brother's collar. He tied the leash around a pipe that was on the edge of the wall. Luke's brother frolicked around but his leash kept him from getting far, so he began to take off his clothes.

"Luke!" Riley ran up to Lukeguy and in defense Luke pulled out a pocket knife and stabbed him.

Riley fell to the ground coughing violently.

"Riley is dead yes!" Luke said, shaking.  
"Finally, the mass murder had to start eventually I was getting bored" Nicholas said.  
"Blood! Yum!" Mike said, licking Riley's blood off of his stomach.  
"Anger" Fang exclaimed.  
"Great, first Cloud is mean to me, then Samuel kicks me in the ass, and now Luke my love stabs me. Being nice here was..was a bad idea...ugh...its not use..." Riley coughed  
"Its not use" Cloud repeated.  
"Its not use" Alice repeated.  
"Its not use" Mike repeated.  
"Its not use" Luke repeated.  
"What are you guys doing?" Pseudonym asked.  
"Sorry it's a Kik thing, just shitposting" Cloud explained.  
"That...doesn't translate well into conversation." Pseudonym said.  
"Kys" Ziggy said  
"Can we just remove the Kikes from the group?" Rydli suggested.  
"Why I oughta" Marrowksy said angrily, getting ready for fisticuffs.  
"FELLAS!" StarForce yelled.

They were all interrupted by the arrival of a certain someone. A horse carriage pulled up about 20 feet from the building. Some haikuers stood outside to see the visitor. A horse made a horse noise and the door to the carriage flew open. A suitcase dropped out and landed on the ground. The young man jumped out of the carriage fluidly and majestically, as if he was doing an air walk. Landing on the ground with a gentle bow, he stood up slowly, lifting his head for all to see, crossing his arms, and giving a smirk. He gave a nice point to himself

"KONO REU DA!"  
"gay" Carz said, stepping out of the carriage after him.  
"Moguls should duck the horse and blaze it up so we can cum cum cum cum orgy bless is gay" Carz said  
"Haha you were expecting Dio but it was I, Reu!" Reu said  
"Oh yeah, ahem. Pleasure to be reunited with you wise guys" he continued in an Italian accent, putting a hat on.  
"You know what this day has been missing? Smash." Cloud stated.  
"Fuck Smash" Nicholas said.  
"Melee was a mistake" Reu said.

Cloud walked over and pushed Reu under the horse carriage then slapped the horse's ass so it ran over him.

Joe walked up next.

"Yooooooo hey guys!" she greeted.  
"Joe..." Pantz said.  
"Pantz bro we meet again hey wanna smoke weed haha just kidding unless you want to in which case I bought weed"  
"Joe wtf are you thinking. Of COURSE we would smoke weed. We came to Haikucon to do some kooky and regrettable things not to shake hands and talk about things we would already talk about online" Pantz smiled.

Jp, Eden, and Berserker walked into the building next.

"Hey guys" Jp greeted.  
"Hi." Eden said.  
"Shrek." Berserker said.  
"Haha, classic Berk. That is so Berk. I'm really feeling Berk right now!" Rydli laughed.  
"Hi Jp" said Stickboy.  
"Did somebody say J...nothing after that just the letter J?" J said.  
"Well technically yes I did say J but it was apart of Jp meaning Jp" Stickboy said.  
"Color me surprised, I could really go for a Peanut Butter and Jjjjjjjjjjjjjjj sandwich right now :D" J raised his eyebrows repeatedly.  
"You know Jjjjjjjjjj is just the letter J said over and over again and not a long drawn out J right? You could just say Jaaaaay because that would actually make sense" Stickboy said.  
"Ok hold on can I do my line again"

J walked out of the building and back in.

"Whoa whaaaat? What is happening here? Are all of my haikuer friends gathered in this one location? Why didn't you guys tell me?" J asked.  
"J are you honestly expecting us to believe you coincidentally walked by this building right as Haikucon was going down, happening to be in the same county let alone the same state?" Mr. Moogle asked  
"I had no idea guys no one invited me" J confessed.  
"Show us your invitation J" Jp said.  
"Invitation? I didn't get one!" J said.  
"I just like hanging out in this old abandoned Milwaukee warehouse on the weekends" he admitted.  
"Whatever" Gingerale scoffed, flipping his hair.  
"Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee  
Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeereeeererrerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrry guys!" Kirby shouted, entering the place.  
"Oh shit Gluvr's here" ToastWolf said with excitement.  
"Uh hey let's use more appropriate language here pal" DryBones said.  
"DryBones it's a party live a little" ToastWolf encouraged.  
"No"  
"I miss Ziggy" Bless said.  
"This is so amazing! What should we do guys? We can play some music together with our instruments, or play board game irl, I also brought...cards against humanity!" Kirby jumped around with glee.  
"By the way does anyone know who that screaming naked boy in the corner of the room is?"

Everyone stood or sat quietly as the next haikuer walked in, only the sounds of their footsteps could be heard as they approached the group. The haikuer wore a red mask covering the lower and upper quarters of their face, leaving only eyes and a beak to be seen.

"Am I late?" they asked.  
"Who is that?" StarForce asked.  
"StarBird." Jp said.  
"One of the more mysterious haikuers, nobody knows StarBird's age, appearance, not even their gender." she explained as StarBird walked past the group, grabbing a cup of coffee from a catering table and then standing down at a table quietly.  
"Strange, one of the last people I'd expect to show up" Alice said.

The 39th person to enter was none other than Naomi, or better off known as Isaac These Days.

"Hey guys" Isaac greeted.  
"Hi Naomi" Rydli greeted.  
"I'd prefer Isaac" he said.  
"No problem, welcome to Haikucon" Reu topped his hat and shook Isaac's hand.  
"Wait where is Jillian or otherwise known as Flameflare?" StarForce asked.  
"Don't be foolish StarForce you were in HDA don't you remember what happened to her?" Gingerale said.  
"Oh yeah true" StarForce nodded.  
"That did happen" Grenade confirmed.  
"Well no need to elaborate since we all remember what happened" Kirby said.

One final person showed up shortly after. But like J, it was someone without an invitation. Jacob the otaku walked in, knocking on the door to alert his presence.

"Yo bros.." he waved.  
"Whoa Jacob you actually showed up!" Lemon said.  
"Well sometimes a coops gotta fly you know what I mean" he said.  
"Ok I know we've seen some obscure haikuers here before but who the fuck is Jacob?" Element asked.  
"Jacob "Rock My Socks Off" [insert last name here], joined Haikik after being met in a Smash chat, stayed and grew accustomed to our lifestyle. He's a staple at this point" Alice said.  
"Uhhhhhhhhhhhg this is HAIJUCON not Kik-Kon? Get that nasty weeb piece of trash out of of here he doesn't belong!?" Robert yelled.  
"Whoa slimmer down there, Madonna. I'm just here for a good time and Fritos no need for hostility. And also I'm not a fucking weeb I chose my username when I was 12." Jacob explained.  
"Come on guys Haikik is just a division of Haiku, he still communicating with a lot of the community. It's not like this is a Haiku oriented game show or anything in which case of course we shouldn't allow him" Mr. Moogle said.  
"Alright but if he acts up I'll go angryphent on this bitch" Element said.

Jacob took out a small pocket notebook titled "Haiku References and You", and scanned through the pages.

"Oh that was a good one" Jacob chuckled.  
"I wouldn't want to remove myself from the group, though, am I right" he laughed, bumping his elbow on Cloud.  
"Well it's been 15 seconds and no one new has showed up I think we can take this as an indication that everyone is here" Marrowsky said.  
"Let's do shit"

And Haikucon's true party began there.

"Alright guys we need to go in with something big. You know what I'm thinking?" Nicholas asked.  
"Satanic sacrifice?" Shinxy asked  
"Yes." Nicholas said, snapping his fingers.  
"Alright but we need someone to use..." Blooberri scratched her chin because it was itchy.

Cameron barged into the building.

"Rev up those dicks, because I sure am one huge faggot!" he shouted.

Lukeguy stabbed Cameron, he fell to the ground and the haikuers started beating him up. Nicholas threw him on the ground over a pentagram and his internal organs started to burn and bleed out. All of the haikuers save for Lukeguy and Berserker joined hands in a circle around the pentagram and set their hair on fire, bowing down so their heads joined together and a giant blaze engulfed Cameron, he screamed in agony as he burned to death in front of the haikuers.

"That was cool" Sunnia said.

Some menacing chuckles could be heard from an unknown source. The haikuers looked around trying to pinpoint who was laughing.

"So here you all are. Gathered once again." the mysterious voice said.

Some haikuers just looked at each other and shrugged.  
The man appeared from a puff of smoke on the stage standing in the back of the room. He held a cane in his hand and wore a top hat, gloves, and some sunglasses.

"Are you the host?" Kirby asked.  
"Yes I am. I sent out all of the invitations and paid for your trips here. Well, except for J and Jacob, but the more the merrier." he shrugged.  
"Wait who are you? A haikuer we haven't seen a selfie of?" Jp asked  
"Just call me The Admin for now" he insisted.  
":s" was the expression on Cloud's face.  
"That's not a very creative title." Pseudonym said.  
"I'm here to propose something" Admin spoke as he walked across the stage.  
"A trip around the world."  
"I'm in" J said confidently.  
"Haiku Drama World Tour"  
"I'm out" Element backed away.  
"Another Haiku Drama?" StarBird asked.  
"Are we on camera right now? Hi mom!" StarForce said.  
"Every week is a new location. The longer you survive, the more of the world you'll see. And as fans of Total Drama may have figured, this season also has a musical overlay" Admin explained.  
"No no no no I've had enough of this shit I already died twice in these stupid things, I'm not signing up for this" Element complained.  
"Will you do it for 1,000,000 stars?" Admin asked.  
"What kind of question is that, the odds of me beating everyone is like 1/40 I'm never gonna win" Element said.  
"Hey Element shit the fuck up I'm digging this" Joe said.  
"Guys this is what we always wanted! The haiku road trip on steroids, this will be great!" J insisted.  
"Hmm" Robot said.  
"Well said Robot" ToastWolf said.  
"I'm not sure about this, Haiku Drama + 20,000 feet in the sky = death" Rydli said.  
"Yeeeeeeeeh I don't knoooooow, it's a trip around the world but eeeeeeeh I don't feeeeeeeel like it" Gingerale said.  
"Come on Gingerale, it's what Cameron would have wanted" Pantz said.  
"Oh yeah, rip Cameron..." Gingerale said.  
"He died too young for his own good" Riley sighed.  
"Actually guys I think I'm still alive" Cameron coughed.  
"Shut up you're irrelevant" Cloud said, kicking him.  
"What do you guys say, one last ride together?" Admin offered one last time.

The haikuers looked around at each other to see the different expressions. Some were worried and others were had a questionable look, Sam had one of confidence and Lukeguy looked nervous just to be here.

"Just do it." Berserker said.

Suddenly, a lion jumped through the window and roared.

"What the heck where did that lion come from?" Joe asked.  
"It looks like we just entered The Real Milwaukee" J said.  
"Quick, feed it Cameron's body and we can make a run for it!" Nicholas suggested.  
"Now Nicholas that's just rude" Robert said.  
"Hold on let me explain why sacrificing a persons to make a getaway is justified" Nicholas said.

A huge plane crashed through the building, running over the lion and splattering blood on Jacob's new white jeans ("really dude"), and also tearing down the back wall and knocking over the coffee maker like an asshole.  
Admin knocked on it and a door flung open, a short set of stairs popped down.

"Follow me" Admin said, waking inside.

Everyone followed him inside.

"This plane has two chambers for you to sleep in. Whichever team loses a challenge will sleep in this lower-class chamber. Better strap on so you don't fall around, it gets bumpy back here." Admin explained.

"We have to sleep standing up? Ugh that sounds so strenuous" Pseudonym sighed.  
"Then don't lose faggot" Sam pushed him down.

"This first class chamber is for the winners of the challenge. They get to chill and relax in this cozy area with a food bar, TV access, massage chairs, and carpet flooring." Admin continued.

"Holy FUCK CARPET FLOORING" Ziggy screamed, rolling around the carpet.

Joe licked the carpet.

"You will be served breakfast, lunch, and dinner here in the mess hall area of the plane" Admin said.

[Admin in le confession toilet]  
"And here you can let everyone at home know how you feel, I'm sure you're used to this by now"  
[le end]

[Berserker in le confession toilet]  
*fart*  
[le end]

[Lemon in le confession toilet]  
"This sounds like it's going to be fun. I don't have my eyes on winning but I'm sure it'll be fun along the way"  
[le end]

"There's also storage for your shit and other rooms that you can stand in or whatever who cares. Oh and one final, important room. This is where the elimination ceremonies will be held. The losing team will vote for someone to leave. For every ceremony all but one receive a bag of deez...Mountain Dew can. They will all move on to live another day, the loser will have to take the drop of shame and parachute down to wherever the hell we are at that point of time." Admin continued.

"That's nice and all but I'll have to decline, thanks for the tour but I must go back to my PC" Element said, opening the door and about to jump out.

It was then Element looked down and screamed like a little girl when he noticed they were already airborne. The wind fiercely blew inside, he accidentally took one step out but his hand was grabbed by Marrowsky who tugged him to safety, Admin closed the door.

"Element don't foll" Cloud said.

[Lukeguy in le confession toilet]  
"...I hope he folls."  
[le end]

"Yeah that wasn't very smart of you" Admin said.  
"What the fuck? Who is even flying this thing?" Element asked, his heart racing.

Admin showed them all to the cockpit hehehe ok sorry anyways the cockpit. Admin opened the door and zombie was flying the plane.

"Hey gays" Imboo greeted.  
"Imboo are you ever gonna get a spot as a contestant?" Pantz asked.  
"No stfu"

"Riley you can stop filming everything this is a televised show" Alice said.  
"No Alice you see my fans, of GenesisFrenzy my YouTube channel, will love to see everything on the show from my point of view, it'll be like so real!" Riley said.  
"Ok have fun killing your phone everyday" she shrugged.

Ding!

"Did someone finish making hot pockets?" Grenade asked.  
"Hot pockets? What? What kind of question is that? Shut up. Whenever you hear that ding it's time for the musical segment. You'll have to break into a musical number no matter what you are doing. You don't sing? You're out." Admin said.

[Element in le confession toilet]  
"Easy enough, this just got easier. Because this is easy not to mess up. And by mess up I mean doing what you're supposed to do.  
I'm not going to sing."  
[le end]

"So we just...sing..." Sunnia said.  
"Yes that is the point of this." Admin said.  
"What if we're shy teehee" Lemon asked.  
"Too bad, you gotta do it." Admin answered.  
"Either way, that was just a sound test. The next time you hear it, it'll be the real thing. Anyways, it looks like we're coming up on our first location!" Admin said.  
"Really? What is it? Paris? London?" Kirby asked.  
"I hope it's Japan so I can buy one of their nice toilets" DryBones said.

Everyone shook as the plane came to a jarring stop, loud noises of scrapping metal from outside could be heard. Admin looked out the window and saw they ran over a deer.

"Really dude? Imboo I hope you get better at this" Admin sighed.  
"Isn't Imboo like 13 how is he flying a plane?" Jp asked.  
"Oh Jp haha. First time on Haiku Drama, huh?" J laughed.

Outside Admin stood in a large desert wasteland. The haikuers started to walk down the stairs one at a time GingeraleDragon got to the ground first.

"You. Left" Admin ordered.  
"Ok" Gingerale said, walking to his left and standing alone.

Rydli was the next to reach the ground.  
"Right" Admin ordered.  
"Not my right your right"

Rydli stood alone on the right side.  
Mr. Moogle appeared next and was sent to the left, Fang fourth sent to the right.

As each haikuer got to the ground, Admin ordered them to either the left or right group. Eventually all 40 were separated into the two groups. 20 for both of you can't divide 40 by 2.

"Say hello to your new teams, fellas. Feel free to choose your team name yourselves.

Everyone looked around at their teammates.

Team 1:  
GingeraleDragon  
Mr. Moogle  
Robot  
Nicholas  
Isaac  
Berserker  
StarForce  
Robert  
Reu  
J  
Stickboy  
Mike  
ToastWolf  
Madorky  
Sam  
StarBird  
Sunnia  
Lemon  
Blooberri  
Riley

Team 2:  
Rydli  
Fang  
Element  
Pseudonym  
Bless  
Carz  
Jp  
Grenade  
Ziggy  
DaUser  
Shinxy  
Cloud  
Joe  
Kirby  
DryBones  
Eden  
Marrowsky  
Lukeguy  
Pantz  
Jacob

"Heh, hey Element looks like we're on the same team" Shinxy blushed.  
"Yes there was a 50% chance of this happening what a surprise" Element replied.

[J in le confession toilet]  
"Me and Marrowsky aren't on the same team...no..."  
[le end]

"I miss...oh hi Ziggy" Bless said.  
"Hey Bless" Ziggy responded.  
"I'm an ironic memeing piece of shit"  
"oh"  
"Bless on my team? Can this GET any gayer? All we need now is minions." Carz sighed

"Hey Riley looks like we're on the same team. That's coop." Alice said.  
"Not now I'm trying to masturbate"  
"What"  
"Imagine me orgasming in places all around the world. That would be amazing" Riley said.  
"You're such a lirtle freak" Alice said

"Bless AND Jacob? Could this team get anymore homosexual?" Cloud sighed  
"Hey you little shit that was my shitpost faggot now back off or I'll Shrek you're faking dick off" Carz threatened.

"So we're on the same team Nicholas." Mr. Moogle said.  
"Ah yes the unbearable duo. I meant unbeatable fuck autocorrect" Nicholas said.  
"Me and Niclas are on the same team! Swastikal, let's fuckin murder everyone and eat their dead bodies!" Mike suggested  
"That's a good idea" Nicholas said.

"Cloud...Luke...Bless...that guy I don't know but he uses Kik so he's probably an asshole...ugh hopefully I can fail that musical thing soon." Element grunted, a huge anime tear fell from his face  
"What the fuck was that oh my god just being around them is making me a weeb" Element sighed.

Stickboy glanced over to see Jp on the other team and sighed.

"Alright so team names. I'm thinking Super Smash Brothers Melee" Rydli suggested.  
"Good name" Cloud said.  
"The Meat Beaters" DryBones suggested.  
"DryBones go away. I got it; The Strawhats." Cloud said.  
"None of us have strawhats" Eden said.  
"Team Boobs" Bless said.  
"Girl boobs or Drake and Josh boobs?" Kirby asked.  
"I..." Bless said.

"Team Buttercup" ToastWolf said.  
"Team Swastika" Mike suggested.  
"oo that's a good one, let's go with that" J said.  
"Agreed." Reu said.  
"Alright we've decided our team name will be-" Mr. Moogle began before being cut off.  
"Wait wait wait. I just had a hilarious idea. Let's ironically call ourselves Team Jacob!" GingeraleDragon suggested to no one's amusement.  
"No." Alice said.  
"But think about it, imagine the hilarity when the other team notices our name and goes "Oh I'm picking up what you're putting down" and names themselves Team Edward accordingly. But here's the kicker: there's a JACOB on THEIR team"  
Gingerale explained, chuckling to himself.  
"No. Our team name is Team-" Moogle began.  
"JACOB!" Gingerale screamed.  
"Gay. We're the Troll Slaiyers" Cloud said confidently.

Some Team Jacob members face palmed.

"I, for one, approve of Team Jacob's name" Jacob said.

The teams get their group photos and were ready for the challenge.

"Alright Admin so where are we? What magical land will begin our world tour?" Marrowsky asked.

"Utah!" Admin proclaimed.

"More like whotah, right?" Jacob said.  
"Stop talking." Robert replied.  
"Utah, eh? This happened to be one of my leads on Rhythm's location." ToastWolf said.  
"Oh, really, we're going with this? That wasn't just a one note joke? Ok then" Stickboy said.  
"Shut up your entire character was swearing last season" ToastWolf said.

"Alright, settle down contestants. Your first challenge here in Utah is simple: climb Kings Peak." Admin said.  
"Kings Peak? Isaac asked.  
"I know this! It's the highest point of Utah, and takes at least a 32 mile hike" J explained.  
"J why do you know this, nobody cares about Utah" Gingerale said.  
"I love geography, I find facts about different states and countries interesting" he explained.  
"Is that going to help us win the challenge? I think not, so shut up" Gingerale said, crossing his arms.  
"Anyways, I should also mention everyone is allowed one bag full of their gear for every exploration based challenge. Some challenges can be tedious, but bringing food and water can help" Admin said.  
"Oh that's wonderful, let me just get my bag from the hotel back in Milwaukee." Pseudonym said sarcastically.  
"Not my problem" Reggie said.  
"I don't know about you guys, but this is gonna be AWESOME for my Pokewalkers" Riley said, swinging the strings of his sweater with Pokewalkers attached to each one around.

Admin reached under his hat and pulled two books out, he tossed one to each team, caught by StarBird and DaUser.

"Fun fact, most of Utah is Mormon. The most Mormon of the U.S. When you reach the top of Kings Peak, I also want you to have that Book of Mormon with you. If you fail to have the book in your possession...you lose!" Admin explained.

"K" Fang said.  
"Can I hold the Book of Mormon?" DryBones asked.  
"No DryBones you'll mess it up somehow and then we'll all vote you off and you'll be stuck in Utah" Cloud said.  
"Can I hold it?" Bless asked.  
"Sure I don't care what happens to you" Cloud said.  
"I thought DaUser was holding it, who put you in charge Cloud?" Kirby asked.  
"oh" DaUser said.  
"I think DaUser should hold on to it, he won't let us down" Kirby suggested.  
"Ok blush" DaUser said

"So, I nominate Robot to hold the book" Mr. Moogle proclaimed.  
"Yeah sure ok" Robot said, firmly grasping the book.  
"Well then LET'S FUCKING GO!" Sam shouted, pumping his fists.

Ding!

"And with the beginning of the challenge comes our first song" Admin said cheerfully.  
"Great a montage could make this a lot less tedious" Grenade said.

"Now go" Admin ordered, and everyone too off.  
"Guys I don't know about this how can I just make up a song on the spot I'll look silly..." Lemon said nervously.  
"Cheer up Lemon, if Phineas and Ferb can do it so can we" Blooberri encouraged.

[Song #1 - Ain't No I In Utah]  
Lemon: U! T! A! H!  
Jacob Choir: UTAH! UTAH! LET'S GO!  
Jp: Here we go now, our journey begins!  
Shinxy: I'm super really happy to be with elly-kins! /  
Mr. Moogle: It helps that I'm experienced with singing in a choir.  
Eden: I don't want to sing, but the situation is dire.  
Riley: I wanna to be the very best, the best there is on YouTube  
Jacob: I want to marry a cloud  
J: I want to travel the world  
Sam: I WANT TO WIN  
StarForce: Hey gang, let's give a teamwork song a spin!  
Troll Slaiyers run across some rocks standing in a river.  
Slaiyer Choir: Cause there ain't no I in Utah!  
Jacob Choir: Stubbornness won't get you very far  
Both Teams: Together's the key, until the preliminary. Winning is our destiny!  
DryBones: Go to Japan  
Kirby: Make lots of friends!  
Lemon: Live a mundane life  
GingeraleDragon: Blah blah blah, I just wanna kick some ass  
Cloud: Settle it in-  
Nicholas: Fuck Smash  
Pseudonym: All this singing and running makes me wanna die  
Pantz: Death is good, but you gotta try  
Jacob Choir: Cause there ain't no I in Utah!  
Slaiyer Choir: Stubbornness won't get you very far  
Blooberri: Together's the key  
Rydli: Until the preliminary.  
Isaac: Winning is our destiny!  
Mike: Can't wait to murder all the Jews!  
Reu: yare yare daze...this guy's giving me the blues  
Fang: I hope I can stop J2  
ToastWolf: I need to find Rhythm...  
DaUser: .  
Stickboy: Speaking of rhythm, we need help with that, a lot  
Bless: My dick says yes, but my heart says no, I'm not sure I'll just follow le flow  
Carz: Gay  
Joe: What did you say?  
Carz: Gay  
Joe: WHAT DID YOU SAY?  
Carz: GAY! GAY! GAY!  
Grenade: U to the T, to the A to the H  
Marrowsky: Like Uracil to Thymine, and Adenine to...Hypoxanthine?  
StarBird: I'm not used to this stuff but I'll give it a shot  
Robot: My singing has no inflection cause I'm a stale robot.  
Robert: But the despite of it all, we will sing and not fall  
Berserker: Ehh...ehhhh...ahhhh...sing words...  
Jacob Choir: THAT'S RIGHT! Cause there ain't no I in Utah!  
Slaiyer Choir: Stubbornness won't get you very far  
Both Teams: Together's the key, until the preliminary. Winning is our destiny!  
Madorky: The road is long, and we've only just started  
Element: Who is to say you'll even make it far? Damn it who farted? Fuck that rhyme  
Shinxy: Yay! You're still in, and your singing is fine! :3  
Ziggy: At the end of it all, a waifu will be mine  
Stickboy: I can't think of a rhyming line  
Sunnia: Bloo's selfies, looking fine  
Admin: That's all but one, finish it off Luke!  
Lukegiy: I...pebirg  
Everyone: That's right!  
Cause there ain't no I in Utah!  
Ain't no I in Utah!  
Not about you, not about me  
All about us, and the U.S has UTAH!  
Jacob Choir: U!  
Slaiyers Choir: T!  
Admin: A!  
Everyone: H!  
Mr. Moogle: and don't forget about the mormoooooooooons  
[le big finish]

The Troll Slaiyers were walking together up a ragged path, fatigued from singing even thought most of them had one line. A man wearing a white shirt and black tie, with some nice black pants and shoes, wearing only a smile, made them all stop.

"Hello!" he greeted.  
"My name is Elder Wright! And I'd like to share with you this book of Jesus Christ' he began to sang.  
"Please stop, we already had our musical number" Marrowsky requested.

"Ni hao! My name is Elder Nguyen"  
"Elder, huh? Do you have the elder scrolls? That was an elder scrolls reference." GingeraleDragon said  
"Actually I was wondering if you've seen my book?" Elder Nguyen asked.  
"Book? Of what? ToastWold asked.

"Eternal life! Is super fun!" Elder Wright was dancing by bending his knees.

The Troll Slaiyers for the most part were plugging their ears, but Joe was smiling and bouncing her head rhythmically to the singing.

"So anyways have you seen my Book of Mormon?" Elder Nguyen asked.  
"No." Nicholas said.  
"Come on guys we should get going so the Trill Slauers don't get ahead" Nicholas said, beginning to walk.  
"Can I walk with you?" Elder Nguyen asked.  
"No." Nicholas said.  
"So anyways, did you know Jesus Christ used to live here in the USA?" Elder Nguyen was telling Nicholas.  
The rest of the team follower closely.

[Berserker in le confession toilet]  
"I hope this doesn't last long"  
[le end]

"So yeah have you seen a Book of Mormon?" Elder Wright asked.  
"No." Cloud said.  
"Yeah we actually have one right here!" Kirby said.  
"We need that for the challenge though..." Eden said.  
"After we get to the top of Kings Peak and the challenge is over you can have it" Kirby said.  
"Thanks for the offer but I don't even need the book myself." Wright said.  
"Why not?" Kirby asked.  
"Not to be rude but we should probably get moving." Grenade suggested.

Elder Wright began to explain as they walked up the path.

"You see, each Mormon has a buddy. One buddy holds the book with all the knowledge and power while the other Mormon does all the physical work. But one thing you must make sure never happens: The Book of Mormon should never be burned."  
"Oh" DohUser said  
"Sounds cool to me!" Ziggy said, flashing a thumbs up and combing his hair back.  
"There are lots of boulders ahead, how should we get across them?" Jp asked.  
"We can climb over them" Jacob suggested.  
"Whoa Jacob you're pretty good at this where did you learn so much about rock maneuvering?" Rydli asked.  
"Me and my dad go hiking a lot" Jacob said.  
"That's pretty cool, bro. Sounds like a valuable team member to me" Rydli winked.  
"Well." Jacob smiled and out his hands to his hops.  
"Glad to see some appreciation for my skills, bro!" Jacob replied

[Rydli in le confession toilet]  
"Y'know, I'm really feeling Jacob! He hasn't actually talked to me before, since he's just been on Kik. So I must have left a good press ion on him B)"  
[le end]

The Troll Slaiyers were climbing over the rocks, while Team Jacob approached the opposite side of the mountain. They looked up to see if they could see the top.

"Looks like a long way up" Lemon said.  
"Thanks for confirming that, Lemon." Stickboy thanked.  
"Hey what if we all got on each other's shoulders and made a 20-person tall tower? Then the person at top would be at the top!" StarForce suggested.  
"You're an idiot" Alice said.  
"What if StarBird flew to the top?" ToastWolf suggested.  
"I'm not actually a bird, ToastWolf." StarBid replied.  
"Aha! So that narrows your species down by one!" ToastWolf said, taking out a pen and paper and writing that down on a piece of paper.  
"Well since Berserker is still half robot half thylacine half human we can use the power of his arm to shoot Robot in the air, once she gets to a certain height she can kick in her rocket boost just enough to reach the top" Mr. Moogle suggested.  
"Well since Shrek is still half onion half Blart half ogre we can use the power of his fort to shoot Barry Bee in the air, once he gets to a certain height he can kick in his spaghetti boost just enough to foll off the top" Alice said.  
"Well since Shrek is still half onion half Blart half ogre we can use the power of his fort to shoot Barry Bee in the air, once he gets to a certain height he can kick in his spaghetti boost just enough to foll off the top" Mike repeated.  
"Well since Shrek is still half onion half Blart half ogre we can use the power of his fort to shoot Barry Bee in the air, once he gets to a certain height he can kick in his spaghetti boost just enough to foll off the top" Lemon repeated.  
"Well since Shrek is still half onion half Blart half ogre we can use the power of his fort to shoot Barry Bee in the air, once he gets to a certain height he can kick in his spaghetti boost just enough to foll off the top" Riley repeated.  
"Let's just walk to the top" StarBird suggested.  
"Someone wake Stickboy up he's sleeping like a Mexican aka Bless" Nicholas said.  
"Or me" Lemon said.  
"Oh shit Lemon how long have you been here i thought you died or something" Nicholas said

"Ok ok so I'm The Awesome, Rydli's The Power, Shinxy's The Gay, DryBones' The Bastard, Element's The Fire Power, Jacob's The Sissy, and Cloud's The Money Guy" Marrowsky said.  
"You can't just give titles to 40% of the group, what is everyone else?" Jp asked.  
"Good point, we should get rid of the other 60% so we don't have deadweight" Cloud said.  
"Why am I The Sissy? Can't I be The Awesome?" Jacob asked.  
"Nobody knows you" Marrowsky said.  
"Hmm, I'll sacrifice my title of The Power and give it to Jaxon because he's my bro" Rydli said.  
"Really niggers you're just gonna leave the rest of us out like that" Ziggy said.  
"Why the hell am I The Fire Power?" Element asked.  
"Retard. You're the master of flame wars" Bless said.  
"Yeah Element even Bless knows that" Cloud said.  
"Heh, I think you're pretty hot Elent..." Shinxy blushed  
"Ok Shonxy seriously you need to end this Elent talk" Element said.  
"Hey guys I think we're nearing the top" Marrowsky said up ahead s bit.  
"Great. That's great. Great. Lol greats. Haha great. Lol." Joe said.

"Do you guys want to hear about my Mormon backstory?" Elder Nguyen asked the team.  
"No Elder Nguyen shit up" Robert said.  
"NDOS! We're here" said Sam.  
The team all ran and emerged at the top of Kings Peak.  
"We did it! We win! This was so underwhelming! But we did it!" Riley shouted.  
"It's kinda pretty looking down from here." J said, peering over the distance.

All of the Jacobs gathered near the edge and looked over as the sun was setting, looking over the sea of trees and mountains, and the water flowing from a nearby lake.

"This is like Super Smash Bros Brawl" Alice said.  
"Brawl!? Not Melee? Preposterous!" a voice shouted out.

Cloud and the rest of the Troll Slaiyers went running up to the peak.

"Your to slow" Riley smirked.  
"No!" Bless shouted.  
"The clouds look very pretty from up here..." Jacob said, his heart beating and his penis blushing.  
"So we win right? So now we have to walk back, right? Ugh..." Isaac sighed.  
"Actually, it's not over yet." Admin said, walking up from the shadows.  
"What do you mean?" Jp asked.

Elder Nguyen sighed, then walked up to the peak with his hands behind his back and spoke facing the sunset.

"It's no coincidence we met. You see me and Elder Wright have something in common." Elder Nguyen said.

"Is it that you two are both Mormon." Grenade asked.

"Both of us seek companionship!" Elder Wright smiled.  
"You see, the Mormons were sent here from another dimension to do battle until only one remained. Once a Mormon is defeated, they are sent back to the Mormon world! Only by burning a Mormon's Book of Mormon can you truly defeat a Mormon!" Wright continued.  
"And me and Wright are the last of the Mormodos." Nguyen sighed.

"Mormodos?" Pantz asked.

"Our true name. But that doesn't matter, what does matter is that we both now have partners and now we can fight. The winner of this battle will be the Mormodo King!" Nguyen shouted, turning around and pointing a finger dramatically.

"The final part of today's challenge, guide your Mormon partner to victory. Whosever Mormon dies loses!" Admin said.  
"Can I give the book to someone else so I don't look bad if I lose?" DaUser asked.  
"Nope! Too late!" Admin said.

All of the haikuers stood near the edge as Robot, DaUser, Elder Nguyen, and Elder Wright stood in the center of the peak.

"This ends now lol" Wright said with a smile.  
"How do we use the books?" Robot asked.

Robot opened the book and a giant light flashed out.  
"seer stones!" Robot shouted, reading some lines.  
Elder Nguyen shot fireballs out of his mouth and they knocked Wright onto he ground.  
"That really hurt!" Wright chuckled cheerfully.  
"Uh..." DaUser said, quickly flipping through the pages.  
"Urim and Thummim" DaUser shouted.  
Elder Wright ripped his tie off, making Joe shekel from the intensity. Wright roared and leaped at Nguyen, scratching his face.  
"Golden plates!" Robot shouted.  
Golden plates emerged from Nguen's hands, and he flung them at Wright, who dodged them epically and caught one in his mouth, throwing it back with Might.  
Nguyen and Wright began floating in the air, throwing out dozens of punches and kicks at each other, successfully blocking each one.  
"Jerusalem!" DaUser shouted.  
A sound wave escaped from Wright's mouth, knocking Nguyen to the ground.  
"Hahamnanahja good game !" Wright said.  
"No! This is not over!" Nguyen screamed, grabbing Wright's leg and tossing him over the cliff.

"Jesus Christ!" Robert said.  
"...of Latter Day Saints" J finished.  
"Looks like it's all over now" Nguyen said, crossing his arms.

DaUser looked at his Book of Mormon and at the cliff.

[le flashback]  
"I think DaUser should hold on to it, he won't let us down" Kirby suggested.  
[le end]

DaUser looked over at his team, Kirby looked disappointed.  
He ran towards the edge and jumped off to everyone's gasp. His fatness made him fastfall. He held his hands out toward Elder Wright. Elder Wright held his hand out.  
The two were getting closer to the bottom, but DaUser extended his arm out as far as he could, the inches between their hands were shortening.

"Anyone up for some Groovy Smoothies?" Alice asked.

Just then Elder Wright came flying up, holding DaUser in his hands. He let him down on the summit, and they looked at each other confidently, nodding.  
Elder Wright's hair was now spiky and flowing crazily.

"Hello! My name is Elder Wright!" he greeted.  
"Impossible!" Nguyen shouted, he jumped at Wright but he did a twirl, letting Nguyen fly right past him, and grabbing his arms in the process. He tugged on them hard as he knees Nguyen's back.

"Ahhh!" Nguyen shouted.  
"Say uncle!" Wright laughed.

Nguyen's eyes went all white and he shouted at the top of his lungs, he kicked his arms and legs out and a huge force pushed Wright away. Wright held his arm in front of his eyes to avoid getting dust in his eye. Nguyen flew at him and gave him an uppercut, blood came out of Wright's chin.  
Nguyen added in a 20x punching combo and then slam dunked him onto the ground, where the force of his landing caused the ground to form cracks. Nguyen flowed down quietly, crossing his arms. He began to walk away by was stopped by the sound of laughter.

"Why do you persist to act so cheerful? You're going to die. This battle is over, accept it." Nguyen scoffed.  
"No...you see...that's the thing about Mormons." Wright said, slowly getting of the ground, blood all over his face.  
"No matter how hard you try to knock us down, no matter how silly you try to make us out to be, deep inside we have a heart of gold. You don't have to agree with us, you don't even have to like us. But nothing will end my will to live a happy life." Wright said, standing up and readying his arms.  
"I will make sure the Mormons have a benevolent king!" he shouted, coming at Nguyen.

Nguyen blocked all of the attacks but each one knocked him back a little, making him grunt.

"Where is this power coming from?" Nguyen asked.  
"Lost tribes!" DaUser shouted.

Wright shouted and a bolt of waves made Nguyen fly backwards.

"Kick him! Kick him!" Cloud shouted.

Wright kicked Nguyen over and over again, finishing him off with a blow to the jaw.  
Nguyen tried to get up, but fell over like a doofus.

"Did I win?" DaUser asked.  
"Sure, just burn Robot's book and it's over" Admin said.  
"Ok how do I do that?" DaUser asked.  
"Uh oh" Wright said.  
Nguyen spit a bit of fire onto DaUser's Book of Mormon.  
"Uh oh lol" Wright laughed.  
"Looks like we've won, only one way to celebrate" Nicholas said, guiding Team Jacob to the fire where they all joined hands and set their hair on fire.  
"No..." DaUser said, trying to put his fire out.  
"It's ok, DaUser, you did your best!" Elder Wright said, giving DaUser a big as he began to fade away.

DaUser held Elder Wright in his arms as he smiled and closed his eyes, before the book burned to a crisp and he faded some more.

"Just remember, it's not your fault" Wright smiled, then shrieked in agony as his face melted, eyes fell out, and straight out died and faded into nothingness in DaUser's arms.  
DaUser looked at the ground with an overwhelming face of horror.

"That's the thing, positivity and optimism will never stand a chance against sheer power and destiny. Elder Wright just happened to be born a loser." Elder Nguyen said.

Reu watched Nguyen walk away down the peak.  
The plane hovered next to the peak.

"Alright guys, everyone jump aboard. The first elimination will be starting soon. Troll Slaiyers, you're up!"

The haikuers were all gathered on the plane. Team Jacob was enjoying themselves in the first class department while the Troll Slaiyers were awaiting their fate in the elimination chamber.

[Robot in le confession toilet]  
You know, all of this happened kinda fast. We just showed up for Haikucon, got invited for the show, and all unanimously agreed to join, and here we are already set in motion of the show at the end of only one day." Robot said.  
[le end]

"A toast, to our first victory. And many to come." Mr. Moogle said, raising a glass of Mountain Dew with a Doritos chip clinging on.

A bunch of the Jacobs rose their glasses to the toast.  
StarBird sat away from the others, sighing and looking out the window.

"Here we are, the first elimination ceremony" Admin announced, the Troll Slaiyers were seated among three rows of seats, two seats filled by seven contestants and one row eight.

"You all casted your vote on the desired loser's passport. 19 will move on, but one will fall...who will it be? Right now, we find out..." Admin said.

Everyone looked around at each other, some with confident expressions others feeling nervous.

[Element in le confession toilet]  
"The sooner they let me off this place the faster I can get home. I've been away from my PC for too long...but with my luck I'm gonna survive long enough to be eaten by a giant Shinx or get gangbanged by a group of Lenny faces..."  
Element sighs  
[le end]

[Kirby in le confession toilet]  
"It's hard to make a choice because I don't want to say goodbye to anyone...but a game's a game I'll have to do this"  
[le end]

[Cloud in le confession toilet]  
"Easy vote, let the failures foll"  
[le end]

[Jacob in le confession toilet]  
"Still have no idea who most of these people are. Eenie meenie minie..."  
[le end]

"Now since the game has only just started and the numbers are high, the votes scatter a lot. We do have lots of different people voted for, but only a small margin determined this lose" Admin explained.  
"Right on" Ziggy said.  
"Now for the Mountain Dew cans...safe tonight are Marrowsky, Eden, Pantz, Ziggy, Grenade, Cloud, Jp, Shinxy, Element, Kirby, Joe, Lukeguy, Bless, aaaaand Pseudonym" Admin announced, throwing a can to each respective contestant, who all caught theirs except Luke, it hit him off the head.

Rydli, Fang, Carz, DaUser, DryBones, and Jacob were the last 6 Mountain Dewless.  
Rydli glanced over at Jacob, then focused his attention back on Admin, smiling confidently.

"Oooooo someone's about to get grounded grounded grounded for 0283748202928364739282738 years" Carz said.

"Thank you for that Carz. Anyways, you and Rydli get the next two cans." Admin said.

Fang, DaUser, DryBones, and Jacob remained.

[DaUser in le confession toilet]  
"Oh..."  
[le end]

[DryBones in le confession toilet]  
"B-but...Japan-sama..."  
[le end]

[Jacob in le confession toilet]  
"Oh I see how it is, picking on the new guy, huh? No...the kikes had to have backed me up on this..."  
[le end]

The four remaining Slaiyers looked at each other.

"J2 probably tampered with the votes" Fang shrugged.  
"Right, anyway, Jacob and DryBones get your Mountain Dew cans so we can get this over with quicker." Admin said.  
"Yes! Not the first voted off two times in a row! Oh boy! Who wants to celebrate with some wheel of fortune later?" DryBones asked.  
"DryBones go back in your cage" Element ordered.

DaUser and Fang, the final two. They looked into each other's eyes and then at the final Mountain Dew can. The intensity was rising...

"Only one can move on..." Admin said one last time.

DaUser closed his eyes.

"The final Mountain Dew can goes to..."

Fang screamed internally.

"Dalosername" Admin said.  
"Yes." Dawinnername said, receiving his Mountain Dew can.  
"What? What sorcery is this? I didn't even do anything? No!" Fang shouted dramatically.  
"Drop of shame awaits" Admin smiled, handing Fang a backpack.

Fang walked over to the edge and gulped.

"Do I at least get a chance to come back?" Fang asked.  
"Maybe. But what would be the point? Nobody who ever comes back ever wins" Admin said.  
"Well it's fun..." Fang said.  
"Yeah whatever have fun in the wasteland of nothingness that is Utah" Admin said, shoving Fang off the plane, and he screamed as he fell in the darkness.

Some of his teammates gathered to the door to watch him fall.

[Rydli in le confession toulet]  
"And the first has fallen. 38 to go, one by one, they will all fall..."  
Flex  
[le end]

With the Troll Slaiyers down their first member, their now remain 19, and 39 overall. Who will be eliminated next? Where will we go next? Who the fuck am I? Find out next time on Haiku! Drama! World Tour!" Admin shouted.

"And so my first day of Haikucon has concluded. Some guy I've never met was thrown off the plane and a bunch of Mormons had a fight to the death. Kinda craving Five Guys right now. This is GenesisFrenzy, singing off" Riley said to his phone camera.  
"Hey Riley can I be in your video?" ToastWolf asked.  
"No. Mostly because you asked me literally right after I said I was ending the video." Riley said.  
"Oo, oo, is there time for me to do a Team Rocket reference? It'll be a classic throwback yes!" J said, preparing his voice  
"To-"  
"Love ru lol!" ToastWolf said.  
"No!" J said.  
"Maybe there's still ti-"

Cut to Admin standing alone in the elimination chamber, watching the sky outside. He dials a number in his phone and calls it, putting the phone to his ear as the other end picks up.

"Hey Simon. Get ready." he said.

End of Day 1  
Initiation at 2.63%  
20-8-5 / 8-1-9-11-21-5-18-19 / 23-5-18-5 / 14-15-20 / 20-8-5 / 15-14-12-25 / 15-14-5-19 / 20-15 / 2-15-1-18-4 / 20-8-5 / 16-12-1-14-5


	2. Italiano

Chapter 2: Italiano

[Shinxy in le confession toilet]  
Shinxy is jacking, off, his penis below the view of the camera, with his eyes closed.  
StarForce knocks on the door.  
"Can you hurry up in there" StarForce asks.  
"Hold ooooooooon" he says, going faster.  
[le end]

[StarForce in le confession toilet]  
"Great start so far, my team is really good! But that also means I have to prove myself if we happen to lose a challenge...oh well I'm sure they would vote for me! Hey what's this white stuff all over the camera?  
StarForce takes his fingers and wipes the sticky white stuff off the lens.  
"Well gee"  
[le end]

Pantz was sitting in the corner of the room, both feet on the bench-like seat, sketching in her sketchbook. Cloid walked up to her.

"Hey Pantz, what's up?" Cloud asked.  
"Shp man, just sketchin like a G yo" she answered.  
"Haha yeah that's my Pantz...,,...well this was a good talk, good luck out there Pantzarono" Cloid said.  
"Don't you mean Pantzarino?" she asked.  
"Sure" Cloud said, walking backwards.  
"Great, the battery in my mouse died and the touchpad SUCKS!" DryBones cried.

Grenade was sleeping while strapped to his seat, leaning forward unconsciously. Carz was sitting next to him.

"Ohhohohoho you are so grounded for 019274639109183648291 years, minions and fnaf are taking over ahhhhh! Bless is gay? help." Carz said.  
"Fnaf, eh? Personally I'd say the sequels don't beat the classic but they still maintain that classic fnaf feel decently well" ToastWolf said.  
"Why are you in the loser section of your team won?" Jp asked.  
"H-hi ToastWolf..." Bless greeted.  
"Hey Bless" ToastWolf said.

Bless ran away.  
Meanwhile in the kitchen some of the haikuers were eating breakfast.  
Kirby, Eden, and Ziggy were eating together. Pseudonym and Jacob were sitting on the opposite side of the table.

"So where do you think we're gonna go for the second challenge?" Kirby asked.  
"Doesn't matter, it'll be smooth flying anywhere with you ladies" Jacob said, then the plane bumped a little and his cereal went flying in his face.  
"Smooth" Pseudonym said.  
"I am also part of this conversation" Eden said.  
"Whoa hey cool memer alert you guys are all cool memers alright!" Ziggy said.

Lemon was sitting with Madorky, Sunnia, and Blooberri.

"Y'know this is pretty cool but I'm kinda nervous we won't be able to keep our winning streak" Lemon said.  
"You mean our winning streak of 1" Alice said.  
"That's the one" Blooberri said.  
"Anyways twas cool we're on the same team Lem my man, we even have Mike!" Alice said.  
"Jews!" Mike screamed in the background.  
"But Cloud and Luke on the other team...yikes..." Alice said.  
"I'm sure they'll do fine without us" Lemon said optimistically.

Gingerale was listening to the conversation from the corridor.

"Mother fuckers. Haikik already up to talking friendly to each other..." He said to himself.  
"Are you talking to yourself?" Robot asked as she was walking by.  
"No...I was just exclaiming because I was surprised" he said.  
"You know there's a confession toilet if you want to speak your thoughts" she said.  
"Shut up woman I know it" he groaned, walking back to the winner cabin.  
"Beep..." Robot beeped.

In the winner cabin, Nicholas was strumming his guitar, Sam was doing push-ups, and Berserker was reading dinosaur comics. Everyone else was standing around with a lost look in their eyes.

"Man, it sure gets boring around here sometimes" Riley sighed.  
"You can say that again" Shadow the Hedgehog agreed.  
"Hey, you know what could help kill this boredom!? A video game review! For the fans of my channel GenesisFrenzy. After all I can't keep them waiting if I want to be YouTube famous one day" Riley said.  
"But, how are you gonna get footage from this high up in the sky, fool?" Shadow the Hedgehog asked.  
"Not a problem, Shadow. I'll just review 3DS games!" Riley said, taking out his 3DS.  
"Riley why are you taking to a Shadow plush" Mr. Moogle asked.  
"You mean Shadow?" Riley asked back.  
"Yes that is the name I just said" Mogla replied.  
"Have you never heard of me, I am the ultimate life form" Shadow said.  
"Right...ok then" Moogle said, returning to his chair.  
"Wait 3DS? Oh shit I knew I forgot something" Mr. Moogle said to himself.

J was bringing candy to the loser cabin for Marrowsky but was stopped at the door by Rydli.

"What are you doing?" Rydli asked.  
"Nothing I was just gonna give some candy to Marrowsky-senpai" J said.  
"Hey I want candy too! In fact you should share some with the entire team!" Rydli said.  
"Uh no lol" J said, trying to walk past.  
"You wouldn't want your team to know you're smuggling to the other team would you?" Rydli asked, grabbing his shoulder.  
"They probably wouldn't care it's just candy." J said.  
"Hey now...we don't need that attitude around here, buster..." Rydli said, taking a snickers bar out of J's hand and slowly putting it inside his mouth seductively. J closed his eyes and chewed slowly.  
"Better?" Rydli asked.  
"Better." J nodded.

Rydli took all the candy and brought it over for all of his teammates to enjoy.

"Attention passengers, we're about to arrive at our destination. Get ready" Admin said over the loudspeaker.

"Did you know every 30 seconds an African person dies of starvation? I thought that was interesting" Isaac said.

Eden looked at her watch.

"Cool"

Both teams, all 39 contestants, were gathered up at the plane's door.

"Welcome to the second location...Italy!" Admin exclaimed, opening the door.

All of the haikuers hopped out of the plane and gazed around. There were many red rooftops on the rectangular buildings, and lush rivers with canoes off to the side separated them. Many bridges arched over the rivers.

"This is just like on Zack and Cody..." Blooberri exclaimed, which made Admin roll his eyes.  
"It's beautifs..." Alice said in awe.  
"Just like Spagonia" Riley noted.  
"Sure beats the shit out of Utah" Robert added.  
"I liked Utah, robot..." J said quietly.  
"Gala 'on can we like go and explore and stuff?!" Kirby asked enthusiastically.  
"Go ahead if you want to negate the challenge and risk getting voted off for not helping" Admin said.  
"This is so surreal...in a place that's not America..." Element shuddered as he looked around and rubbed his eyes.  
"Anyways, today you guys have a cooking challenge. Make the best three course meal and you win. The winners also get a special dinner" Admin explained.  
"Sweet yo, I know a perfect recipe with the pristine amount of Italiano" Ziggy said.

"whyy shrek is piss whyy shrek piss" Bless said.  
"Charming. Now everyone get started" Admin ordered.  
"Uh, where! Do we even have cooking equipment?" Jp asked.  
"Just do it out here in the open. Troll Slaiyers will stay on this side, Team Jacob's area of cooking will be on the other side of the river." Admin explained.

All of Team Jacob crossed the bridge to the other street.

"Admin, I don't think an outdoor kitchen will really wo-oh wow this actually looks cool" Jp said as she saw their working stations.

There was a sink, two stoves with ovens, a grill, and some tabletops with a microwave, blender, and toaster on them. There were also kitchen utensils, a cupboard full of spices, a fridge, and a table with chairs. You know, kitchen shit. The Jacobs had the same set.

Ding!

"Oh sorry, those were my hot pockets" Admin said.  
"Anyways, carry on" Admin ordered, and the challenge began.

"Alright losers what should we make?" Cloud asked.  
"How about some calzone" Rydli suggested.  
"What the hell is that? No shut up. We need actual food Rydli" Cloud said.  
"Fuck you Cloud who put you in charge?" Rydli asked.  
"Let's make fuck" Shinxy said.  
"Shinxy..." Cloud said.  
"Shinxy..." Bless said.  
"Shinxy..." Ziggy said.  
"Shinxy..." Eden said.  
"Shinxy..." Jacob said.  
"I meant duck heheh sooooowwy :0 _" Shinxy apologized.  
"Ok ok! Not a bad idea. We can bag an animal and Fry It Up" Joe said.  
"Italy has some of the best food in the world to work with and you want to cook a wild animal?" Rydli asked.  
"Sure it will be funny" Cloud said, and Rydli facepalmed.

[Rydli in le confession toilet]  
"El loco pollo, yo troll slaiyers Es muy dificil!"  
[le end]

"Cloud this idea is autistic, we could get farther if you just killed yourself right here and now" Rydli said.  
"a you was wrong would of be enough" Cloud said.

Meanwhile at Team Jacob...

"Hey guys I have an idea! Let's make pizza!" J suggested.  
"le pizza ish aggressive o3o" Mike said.  
"Italy created the pizza after all, maybe we'd get bonus points for that idea" J said.  
"Yes J because no one would ever think to make pizza. Anyways sure pizza is Cool." Nicholas said.  
"Alright, what else should we make?" Moogle asked.  
"Lotsa spaghetti lel!" Mike said.  
"Solid idea, Mike. Lotsa spaghetti it is." Mr. Moogle said.  
"I can make a mean ravioli" Isaac said.  
"Hey we're missing a lot of ingredients!" Alice said.  
"Oh that's right, you're gonna have to go find some ingredients yourself if you want to cook to the best of your ability" Admin said.  
"Wow gay. Ok some of you will have to find food while we work with what we have" GingeraleDragon said.  
"I'll go." StarBird offered.  
"I'll go too, sounds fun hahaha" StarForce laughed.  
"Ay yo Tony let me get that fresh pepperoni (I'll go too)" Reu said in an Italian accent.  
"Me" Alice said.  
"oo sounds fun" Lemon said.  
"Me!" Mike said.  
"Can I go?" J asked.  
"No way Jse, the last thing we need is you crossdressing and reading 50 shades of grey in Italy walmarts" NICOTINE said  
";-;" said J.

And so the six heroes set off on their journey to get some fresh pepperoni.

"Hmm..." ToastWolf said as she watched them leave.  
"To birch GET TOBWORK WE CANT LOSE THISbnnn! I play to win not to lose mother dusky!" Sam yelled in2 her ears.

"I hope the team doesn't vote me off as soon as we lose because they hate me" Alice said as they were walking.  
"Aw I'm sure you'll do fine, Alice" Lemon said supportively.  
"Whatever" Reu said emolly, crossing his arms.  
"Anyways where should we go, any ideas StarForce?" Reu asked.  
"Oh I don't know...maybe that way?" StarForce suggested, pointing down a dark ally.  
"Alright then" Lemon said, and the six walked down the street. They heard footsteps coming from around the corner of a building.  
"Down..." Reu ordered.  
":s" Alice said.  
"Guys I have a bad feeling about this just get down" Reu said, and they all got down behind some boxes.

A man wearing a large trench coat walked by, carrying a briefcase. Someone was leaning against a wall with one foot on the wall like a cool guy, awaiting him.

"Did you bring the stuff?" trench coat guy asked.  
"Ay you know me, Luigi, I'm a man of my word. Got it all right here" cool guy said with many hand motions and a thick Italian accent. He handed Luigi a jar, and Luigi took the lid off stuck his finger in and licked the sauce off his finger.  
"Mother fucker...this is pesto. You promised the the real shit you fucking liar" Luigi screamed.  
"Ay yo Luigi, I didn't mean it buddy, I-I swear. Look, I got a guy he's just running a little late. I PROMISE I can get you the stuff I just need more time!" cool guy begged.  
"Too late you piece of shit, you're not even Italian I recognize that Polish accent" Luigi said, putting a gun to his head and pulling the trigger.

Luigi walked away out of sight, leaving the jar of pesto on the ground.  
Alice, Lemon, StarForce, Reu, StarBird, and Mike approached it.

"You think pesto sauce would be good?" Lemon asked, picking it up?  
"What do you think you're doing" Luigi said, waking up to them.  
"Oh shit he came back" Alice exclaimed  
"You idiots think I couldn't hear you? I left for like 4 seconds" Luigi said.  
"Now prepare to di-"  
But then Mile screamed, picked up the jar and threw it off Luigi's head, then ripped open his stomach and feasted on his intestines.  
"Aw now we lost the pesto" Lemon sighed.

Suddenly a lot of mafia members jumped out the windows from the nearby buildings and put a gun to all of their heads, making StarForce scream anxiously.

"I'm glad we followed StarForce's idea." StarBird said.

Stickboy was leaning back in his chair, taking a nap. Then Gordon Ramsay showed up and started screaming at him.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing? Get the fuck out of your fucking seat and get to fucking work you shitty little bitch. Make some fucking food or get he FUCK OUT MY KITCHEN"

Stickboy fell out of his seat.

[Gordon Ramsay in le confession toilet]  
"I'm glad Admin called me here today to guest star on this SHITTY little FUCKING show. I can have some one on one time with the little chefs in training, y'know?  
[le end]

This is Top Iron Hell World Tour HD Remix

DryBones put a banana in a salad and then into a microwave.

"What the fuck was that?" Gordon Ramsay asked.  
"Huh?" DryBones asked.  
"What. The fuck. Was that?" Gordon Ramsay repeated.  
"I was just heating up my banana salad..." DryBones said innocently.  
"You fucking twat! YOU DON'T MICROWAVE A SALAD! Grow a fucking brain and prepare the salad correctly!" Gordon Ramsay screamed into his ear.  
"I'm sorry" DryBones cried, taking the banana salad out of the microwave.  
"Now likc it." Ramsay ordered.  
"I?"  
"Take that fucking abomination you created, and likc it. Likc the banana salad."  
"Please stop swearing..."

DryBones likced the banana salad with tears in his eyes.

"Well I'm gonna do some weed to help me concentrate" Grenade said, smoking a joint.

Kirby, Eden, Jp, Pantz, Jacob, and Marrowsky were searching for ingredients outside the cooking area.

"This place is pretty pretty" Eden said.  
"Yeah man it's pretty dope" Pantz added.

Marrowsky snapped some photos with his camera.

Back at the kitchens, Gordon Ramsay was screaming at Moogle for not preparing a chicken cutlet properly.

"Look man I'm not even making a chicken cutlet I'm trying to make spaghetti..." Mr. Moor tried to explain.  
"DONT BACKTALK ME YOU ASSHOLE" Ramsay exploded.  
"I like this attitude of yours" Robert complimented.  
"I'm sorry less kissing my ass and back to making pastrami" Ramsay ordered.  
"Shut the fuck up I'll make whatever I want you faghot" Robert snapped back.

ToastWolf, Stickboy, and J were nearby putting forks in a toaster.

"Hey ToastWolf, tell me something. You had a weird look on your face when the gang left to get some food. Something wrong?" J asked.  
"Well...to tell you the truth, I'm feeling something off about Reu." She admitted.  
"What, why?"  
"Remember last season? Reu had those four guys hanging around him all the time. But look now." ToastWolf said.

Reu, Alice, Lemon, StarForce, StarBird, and imallama were seated at a huge table while a fat guy ate spaghetti in front of them.

"So..." Lemon tried to push the conversation forward.  
"Hold on" the fat guy said impolitely, stuffing more spaghetti in his face  
Reu looked him dead in the eye.

"Of all the haikuers that were in that alliance, Reu's the only one who made it to this season."

Ding!

"It's that time again!" Admin said cheerfully.  
"Time for you to get a girlfriend" Cloud said.  
"Ohoho! Up top. Memes lol" Ziggy said, giving Cloud a high five.  
"Just start singing" Admin ordered.  
"Hey let's jam to some good Sonic music to help flow some lyrics in" Riley said, putting Rooftop Run on from his phone an bobbing his head to the tune.  
"You are gay." Nicholas said

[Song #2 - Too Many Cooks Redux]  
Nicholas starts off with a guitar solo before the lyrics kick in.  
Bless: Too, many cooks, in the kitchen today  
Cloud and Bless: Too, many cooks, in the kitchen today  
Grenade Cloud and Bless: Too, many cooks, in the kitchen today  
Slaiyer Choir: Too, many cooks, in the kitcheen, riight, noow...  
Nicholas: Yes, that is true! It takes a lot to make a stew  
ToastWolf: You take, the moon, and you take, the sun (hey!)  
Blooberri: You take everything thaaat, seeeems like fun  
J: A dash of looove to, maake it nice!  
Alice, Lemon, Mike, StarBird, StarForce, and Reu: It sucks that we're being held captive by, an obese Italian mob  
Gordon Ramsay is screaming at Pseudonym.  
Pseudonym: My ears are ble-ed-ING, I could use a cotton swab  
Rydli: The key to making pasta...lies in your heart...  
Ziggy; Just take my hand  
DryBones: We're in this together  
Shinxy: To win...we need, each, other~  
Stickboy: Too, many cooks, in the kitchen today  
Sunnia and Stickboy: Too, many cooks, in the kitchen today  
Gingerale Sunnia and Stickboy: Too, many cooks, in the kitchen today  
Jacob Choir: Too, many cooks, in the kitcheen, riight, noow...  
Nicholas does another guitar solo.  
Isaac: There's a lot for us to brew  
Robert: There's a lot for us to brew  
Berserker: There's a lot for us to brew  
Robot: There's a lot for us to brew  
Sam: ONIONS, (shrek!) MIXED WITH PEPPERS! Don't forget to mix it twice  
Sam mixed the onions and peppers.  
Luke: A scoop, full of kids, to add, to the spice...  
Luke stirs up his pot.  
Riley: Sexy, chicken cutlet, dabbed with tomato sauce  
Riley pours he sauce on his cutlet.  
Element: This is bad for my teeth cause, I never floss  
Kirby, Eden, Marrowksy, Jacob, Jp, and Pantz: Sure is a lot to see n-ow, here in It-a-ly  
The six are running through a parade as confetti and balloons rain around them.  
Jp: Leaning towers and coli-seums!  
Kirby: The sight fills me with glee!  
Joe: The recipe for ravioli, starts with you and me  
DaUser: Just take my hand  
Carz: MY DICK IS RUBBER  
Mr. Moogle: To win...we weed, each, other  
Slaiyer Choir: Too, many cooks, in the kitchen today  
Jacob Choir: Too, many cooks, in the kitchen today  
Both teams: Too, many cooks, in the kitchen today  
The Twelve looking for food: Too, many cooks, in our waay riight noow  
Nicholas does one last guitar solo.  
Slaiyer Choir: There's a lot for us to brew (onion onion equals Shrek)  
Jacob Choir: There's a lot for us to brew (onion onion equals Shrek)  
Slaiyer Choir: There's a lot for us to brew (onion onion equals Shrek)  
Jacob Choir: There's a lot for us to brew (onion onion equals Shrek)  
[le big finish]

Marrowsky tossed Rydli a bottle of vinegar and a box of tacos to Ziggy.

"Here's your stuff" Marrowsky said, then leaning back on a lawn chair to get some rest.  
"Anime thumbs up. Top lol thanks mate" Ziggy said.  
"Wait you're not gonna help prepare the food?" Rydli asked.  
"I did my part, don't want to take up too much work from the rest of the team" Marrowsky replied, putting his arms behind his head.

Mr. Moogle was watching from the other side.

"Hey Stickboy can I borrow your glasses?" Mr. Moogle asked.  
"Uh, sure. I don't see the purpose but why not" Stickboy said, handing Mogoe the glasses.

Mr. Moogle put the glasses on and then chuckled, then tipped his glasses up.

"Foolish mistake, it appears they have chosen to make tacos. Little do they know that is a MEXICAN dish!" Mr. Moogle laughed maniacally.  
"Mexican?! That's where Bless is from! F*ck Bless!" Nicholas said.

"Anyone else feeling a little under the weather?" Joe asked.  
"No shut up" Cloud responded

Lukeguy walked over and barfed all over Cloud.

"Now that you mention it I'm feeling a little-" Cloud tried to say but then he sneezed and fell backwards and hit his head off a stove.  
"lol memes...memes...m...'zmzmzz" Zoggy fainted.  
"What the hell is going on with everyone?" Rydli asked himself, looking around to see everyone but Marrowsky looking very ill.

Kirby, Jacob, Jp, Eden, and Pantz returned with some bags of ingredients.

"Hey everyone! How's the cooking going?" Kirby asked.  
"Not well, it looks like everyone suddenly got sick at the same time except for me Marrowsky and you guys" Rydli explained.  
"Uh...what happened while we were gone?" Eden asked.  
"Nothing I just distributed some candy to encourage every...one..." Rydli rubbed his chin.

Robert snickered like a snickers bar from his side, watching the whole scene.

[Robert in le confession toilet]  
"You see I knew about J giving candy to the other team...so I thought it would be interesting to mix thing up a bit with it..."  
[le flashback]  
Robert is farting vey violently into a stack of candy.  
[le end]  
[le double end]

"If I die...tell my family...I hate them..." Lukeguy said on the ground, closing his eyes and falling back.  
"Looks like it's up to us" Jacob said, pulling his sleeves back.  
"Ahh actually it's kinda chilly..." Jacob said, putting his sleeves back down.  
"Let's get cooking..." Jp said.

Alice, Mike, Lemon, StarForce, StarBird, and Reu were still sitting at the table with the fat guy eating lotsa spaghetti.

"Ashhrhrhaha pleasure to be shahs u sainted with uousshsjsjsj glib glib" fat guy said.  
"hey Reu maybe you can use your Italian powers to get us out of here" Lemon whispered.  
"Italian powers." Reu repeated dully.  
"Caesar! Bring me Caesar!" Fat guy demanded, slamming his fist off the table.  
"Caesar, like the salad?" StarForce asked.  
"You fool, why would a fat person want a salad? Cleanly he's talking about the monkey" Alice said.  
"Yeah StarForce use your head" Lemon said.  
"Oh sorry, hehe alright then..." StarForce twiddled his thumbs.

Out came Caesar Anthonio Zeppeli, carrying a plate of ink pasta.

"Here you go." he said, placing it on the table, and the fat guy slurped it up.  
"Whoa..." Reu said.  
"Well hello there" Caesar said, smiling to Madorky. He sat next to her, holding a fancy necklace in one hand and a glass of wine in the other.  
"When you remove this at night, please think of me" Caesar said, kissing it.  
"Cool" Alice said.  
"Alice you just met this..." Reu started.

Caesar leaned in for a kiss but Reu took a fork and picked up some squid pasta and tried to slap it off Caesar's face, but he deflected it. Reu's hat fell off and Caesar caught it, putting it on himself in one fluid motion.

"MAH SLAGHETI" fat guy screamed.  
"Uh..." StarForce said starting to sweat.

Reu tabbed the table and flipped it over.

"Run!" Alice said, and the six of them ran as fast as they could out he restaurant.

Caesar got up but fat guy stopped him. A bunch of mob members ran after them shooting bullets randomly and missing each one because as with fictional stories bullets always miss against the protagonists.

"Keep an eye on that one. We need him." he said.

The six ran as fast as they could until they got back to the kitchen area.

"Look you long enough, did you get anything?" Stickboy asked.  
"Here I managed to get this" Alice said, handing him a bottle of paprika.  
"Paprika? Really? That's your big ingredient." Stickboy raised his eyebrows.  
"SHUT THE FUCK UP AND DON'T BITCH AND MOAN" Ramsay said, punching Stickboy and making him fall down.  
"Can we get this thing going already we should probably leave like soon..." StarForce said nervously.  
"SHIT UP" Ramsay screamed.  
"Ahhh!" StaForce screamed back, putting his hands over his head scared.

Robert was chopping onions when he saw a bunch of cut up peppers next to one of the Troll Slaiyers' stoves from across the river. He looked around cautiously then snuck over and took them, adding them to his dish.

"Alright, times up everyone. The judging will now begin!" Admin declared.  
"Where have you been? I haven't seen you in hours" Rydli asked.  
"It doesn't matter" Admin said.  
"Sonic reference" Riley said.  
"Ok whatever, bring your first dishes up" Admin ordered.

Blooberri and Sunnia brought over a plate of pizza and placed it on the judging table, Jacob brought over pizza in a cone. The judges were Admin, Gordon Ramsay, and of course Chef Imboo.

"Wait a minute...isn't that the same thing we made?" ToastWolf asked.  
"Uh no, we prepared a pizza ice cream cone. Y'know, something original." Jacob said

The three judges took some bites of the pizza and the pizza cone.

"Pizza, is good. But the ice cream pizza? Out of this world! Amazing, hands down!" Admin said.  
"Awful, both of them. The shittiest fucking pizza I've ever eaten. Crust is hard, too saucy, and the pepperoni is not fresh. The ice cream is terrible as well, it falls all over he place and it burns my mouth from how shorty it is Gordon Ramsay said, giving s thumbs down.  
"I like them both they are good but ice cream wins because ice cream" Imboo said.  
"Troll Slaiyers get the first point!" Admin said cheerfully.  
"Woohoo!" some of the Troll Slaiyers cheered, and others groaned from sickness.  
"Did Ziggy finish his secret weapon?" Jp asked.  
"I don't know.." Eden said.  
"I finished...le meme..." Ziggy said, tacos in hand, carefully placing the finishing touches and coughing.

Alice and Reu brought out a plate of spaghetti and placed it on the table. Ziggy brought out a plate of tacos with spaghetti in them.

"Ok this is just plagiarism they are stealing our ideas!" Gingerale complained.  
"No Kys fam they have nothing to do with each other" Ziggy said.

The judges ate teh spaghetti.

"Mm, you know, these are both pretty good! I like the paprika" Admin said.  
"yes" Imboo agreed.  
"Shittiest thing on the planet, which creatures conceived these creations because both deserved to be fired killed chopped up and then baked into a cake so I can eat them digest and shit them out where they belong" Gordon Ramsay said.  
"Alright, both are good, but I have to say the winners are the spaghe-"  
"WAIT! Stop the inhumanity!" someone called out. If was Carly from iCarly!  
"Uh, who are you?" Admin asked.  
"Carly from iCarly" Carly said.  
"Juicy, I'm ready for some iCarly rp!" Mike said.  
"These spaghetti tacos are copyrighted by my brother Spencer! You can't allow them to use them in this silly little contest of yours!" Carly pleaded.  
"Why would they be copyrighted can't you argue all food is copyrighted if that were the case?" Grenade asked.  
"Sir I'm gonna have to ask you to ignore Grenade for he is high right now" Isaac said.  
"That is true hahaja bro I am so gickibg high right meow" Grenade said.  
"Right, okay then. Spaghetti from Team Jacob wins then" Admin said.  
"Yay!" Team Jacob cheered.  
"FUCK you Carly" Sam screamed.  
"Excuse me? Who are you?" Carly asked.  
"I'm Sam" said Sam.  
"Sam...oh my God...Sam it's been so long...you look so much...less masculine..." Carly said.  
"What!" Sam said pusses off.  
"Sam we have so much catching up to do!" Carly said, grabbing Sam and dragging him off.  
"Uh wait! No fuck your Im Sam you can't tell me what to do bitch!'nn no!" Sam screamed.  
"K. So, final dishes, bring them out bros" Admin ordered.

Robert and Mr. Moogle brought out a chicken cutlet, Jp and Kirby brought out a plate of chicken parmesan.

"Hey wait I thought we were gonna use an animal..." Shinxy coughed.  
"Yeah change of plans I actually want to win this challenge, and actually chicken is an animal so..." Rydli said.

"The deciding meal..." Admin exclaimed.

[Kirby in le confession toilet]  
"We worked hard on this I think we can win!"  
[le end]

[Robert in le confession toilet]  
"They don't stand a chance with my fucking secret weapon"  
[le end]

The judges all ate the meals, the teams watched over eagerly in anticipation of the results.

"Italiano" Imboo said.  
"Fucking trash these are the worst chefs I've ever had the displeasure of being experienced to" Ramsay said.  
"You know I thought having you on would be fun but you're kind of giving off a bad vibe here..." Admin said.  
"Anyways, I think the best meal here is from..."

Both teams leaned over nervously.  
They were interrupted by a bunch of Italian mob members lead by Caesar showing up and shooting their guns in the air.

"Wow top rude" Ziggy said.  
"Uh hey we should just go" StarForce suggested.  
"What is this!" Admin asked.  
"We came looking for some paprika" Caesar said.  
"See what happens when you let StarForce lead you guys somewhere" Stickboy burped.  
"I'M SORRY OK" StarForce panicked.

Isaac pulled a rope and a bunch of raviolis rained from the sky and crushed all of the Italians.  
"Ayy"  
"Yooo"  
"Ayyyy"  
"Ayy"  
"Oooh"  
"YaA"  
"Come ooon"  
"Prestooo"  
"Ay yo wise guy" they all screamed as they fell over and out of consciousness.

"What the hell was that?" Element asked.  
"I told you guys I make a mean ravioli, they wouldn't let me make some so I just set it up as a booby trap just for fun" Isaac said.  
"Ok lol" Cloud said.  
"Right...anyways Team Jacob wins, great job. Fantastic dish!" Admin said.

Team Jacob cheered.

"What was that spicy taste?" Admin asked.  
"Peppers" Robert grinned.  
"Peppers? You don't mean peruvian peppers do you?" Gordon Ramsay asked.  
"I don't know I just stole them there wasn't a fucking label" Robert said.  
"Peruvian peppers are banned from cooking contests" Ramsay said.  
"What.." Robert said astonished.  
"You idiot haven't you ever seen Drake and Josh?" Cloud asked.  
"How could they be banned, you didn't say that before! This is just a random challenge on this show we don't have to abide to some random rule" Robert complained.  
"These are definitely peruvian puff peppers...sorry asshole looks like we're gonna have to disqualify the dish" Gordon Ramsay said.  
"In that case...Troll Slaiyers win by default!" Admin said.  
"Yay, my favorite form of winning!" Joe said, and she and the rest of the Slaiyers cheered.  
"No. NO! NOOOOOOOOO!" Sam screamed.  
"What's the matter, Sam?" Carly asked.  
"I stubbed my toe..." Sam said.  
"Now that was fun. Mind if I tag along as your plane's personal chef?" Gordon Ramsay suggested.  
"No I'm the chef" Imboo said.  
"I'm sorry what! You're just a kid, my cooking would be far superior to yours" Gordon Ramsay said.

Imboo narrowed his eyes, then picked up the judging table and slammed it off Gordon Ramsay's head.

"Oh really? Birch I'll show you! I challenge you to a cook off!" Gordon Ramsay challenged.  
"Ok gay bring it on" Imboo said.  
"Right okay save it for next episode, we don't have much time left." Admin said.  
"Wait do we still get our dinner prize?" Kirby asked.  
"Oh yes, of course, an all you can eat buffet of Italian cuisines near the leaning tower of Pisa" Admin said.  
"Awesome!" Pantz said.  
"Alright!" Grenade said.  
"Now that's something I can enjoy" Marrowsky added.  
"But Team Jacob...you got someone to eliminate...who will it be? Meet me on the plane in two hours, where one haikuer's trip will be cut short..." Admin said.

All of Team Jacob sighed, looking around nervously trying to decide who to vote off. Reu looked over and saw Caesar leaning against a building. The two's eyes connected for a short moment before Caesar turned around and walked away.

The Troll Slaiyers were enjoying their autistic *authentic Italian cuisine and gazing around at the Italian scenery. Some Italian girls giggled and blushed as they watched Rydli eat his veal. Rydli just trolled *rolled his eyes and continued to eat.

"Hey...do you mind if feel your muscles?" one of the Italian girls asked.

Rydli sighed.

"Alright, fine, but don't hurt it it's delicate. Need this arm for my tennis game" Rydli explained.  
"We should turn that into a shitpost" Cloud noted.

Pantz chuckled from the other side of the table.  
Lukeguy just sighed sitting alone at his table, feeling a pain in his stomach.  
Marrowsky took a group photo.  
Shinxy sneezed.

Also sneezing was J, sitting in the back row in the elimination chamber. To his left was Blooberri, Sunnia, and Lemon, and to his right Alice, Riley, and Reu.  
In the middle row sat Mr. Moogle, GingeraleDragon, Nicholas, Isaac, Robot, and StarForce. Finally in the bottom row there was Berserker, StarBird, ToastWolf, Robert, Stickboy, Mike, and lastly Sam.

[Nicholas in le confession toilet]  
"So many pathetic performances to choose from, oh well at least this means getting rid of these Useless Team Members won't leave me any regret"  
[le end]

"Man that Carly girl really didn't want me to leave" Sam said, rubbing his back.  
"You're really good at iCarly rp Samlogan!" Mike complimented.  
"Have I mentioned how awesome it is that me and Mike are on the same team? Because it is we are a fu*king beast duo..." Nicholas said.  
"Ikr samesies! We're totes twitches!" Mike said.  
"Alright, settle down everyone. This is your first elimination of the season. After tonight, only 19 of you will move on, and only 38 haikuers will be left on the plane. You all casted your votes on the haikuer passport you want to expire. If you receive a Mountain Dew can you will move on. The one who doesn't receive the can will leave Haiku Drama World Tour. And they can't come back, ever." Admin said.

Everyone looked around kinda nervously.

"Yeah yeah I've been here 3 seasons I get the gist" Mr. Moogle said.  
"Right, Moogle, haha Moogle. Oh Moogle. Moogle. My man Moogle. Man, oh Moogle. Moogle. Moogle...Oh Moogle, that's classic Moogle. Moogle man, that's so Moogle. Rightfully so, you receive a can of dew" Admin said, tossing a can to him.  
"Epic I can be MLG Now..." Moogle said, catching it.  
"Also safe tonight are Nicholas, Lemon, Blooberri, Sunnia, Riley, StarBird, ToastWolf, Reu, aaaaaaaaand Sam.  
"THE MAN" Sam cheered, retrieving his Mountain Dew can.  
"Awesome Shadow we live another day" Riley said.  
"Hmf" Riley's Shadow the Hedgehog plush said.

GingeraleDragon, Robot, Isaac, Berserker, StatForce, Robert, J, Mike, Alice, and Stickboy were left.

[Isaac in le confession toilet]  
"I-I'm really nervous about this...I hope I don't get voted off, oh man I should have helped the team more..."  
[le end]

[J in le confession toilet]  
"Haha my team wouldn't vote for me would they? Haha haha ha...no..."  
[le end]

"Also safe are Isaac, Robot, Berserker, Mike, and GingeraleDragon" Admin announced, to which they all got up and claimed their Mountain Dew proudly.

StarForce, Robert, J, Alice, and Stickboy were left.

"...J...and Madorkt..." Admin said, tossing the cans.  
"whew" J said in relief.

"StarForce, Robert, and Stickboy...one of you are going home...will it be the one who stirred up trouble with an Italian mafia? The one who cursed the team's victory with peruvian puff peppers? Or the...guy with the potty mouth?" Admin asked rhetorically.  
"Hehehe..." StarForce twiddled his thumbs.  
"Yeah okay, just give me my can already." Stickboy said impatiently.  
"Meh" Admin shrugged, tossing the can to Stickboy.

It was down to StarForce and Robert. StarForce was shaking nervously, Robert had a bored expression his face, like he was aware he already won.

"Flight attendants...this is the final Mountain Dew can...and it goes..."  
StarForce closed his eyes and crossed his fingers.  
"To..."  
Robert narrowed his eyes  
"StarForce!" Admin said.  
"Yes! I knew you guys cared about me yes yes!" StarForce said, jumping up and down.  
"Haha like I'd let the Latias to my Goodra down..." Nicholas said.  
"What? Are you fucking kidding me? Jesus shit fuck you all. How many times am I gonna be the second one voted off?" Robert complained.  
"Twice." Robot said.  
"Wait...so Robot and Robert aren't the same person?" J asked.  
"Un-fucking-believable. You know, I messed up. Who cares! If you want to mix situations around we all failed in some way! Screw your ll Haiju, duck yohfuck you you're all mother ducking faghot basement dwellings semen quenching dick whore ass botched who should Kys fuck you fuck you fuck yohfuck you!" Robert screamed.  
"Dude, chill out" Admin said, slamming a parachute in Robert's hand and out of the plane.

Team Jacob gathered around the door to see their first teammate fall.

"Yes...good..." Nicholas said.  
"Well, get some rest all, and good luck in the next challenge." Admin said, and some of the members reluctantly dispersed to their unpleasant sleeping quarters.

Reu stayed behind, staring out the plane and into the Italy skies. He looked back at his team and sighed, then followed behind.

Meanwhile in the first class section the Troll Slaiyers were relaxing.

"Two words. Category movies.  
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _" DryBones said.  
"Is there a Q?" Bless asked.  
"No. The answer is National Treasure." DryBones said.  
"What the heck I didn't even get a second chance" Bless complained.  
"Ok. Two words, a phrase from the show Victorious.  
_ _ _ _ _ _ _" DryBones said.  
"ok andre" Bless said  
"No it was "hi trina"" DryBones corrected.  
"Why would that line stick out from the others?" Eden asked.  
"DryBones did you change the answer because he correctly guessed it and you didn't want to lose?" Grenade asked.  
"No." DryBones said.  
"Someone need a spankin" Joe said.  
"Did someone say spanking? Hehe..." Shinxy replied.

[Element in le confession toilet]  
"Kill me"  
[le end]

J was walking down the hall, coughing. From the opposite side Marrowksy was walking, on his way to the bathroom.

"Hey, Jonah, how are you feeling?" he asked.  
"Oh...hi Marrowsky. A little sick" J said.

Marrowsky tossed a candy bar in the air as he passed him, and J caught it in his palms.  
He looked over his shoulder to see Marrowsky walking closer to the end of the hall, not looking back.

"Snagged you this. Better?" he asked.

J unwrapped the snickers bar and took a bite.

"Better." J repeated.

J continued to walk down the hall back to the loser cabin.

[Rydli in le confession toilet]  
Rydli is chewing on some peppers, holding one in his hand. He's sitting relaxingly with one foot in the toilet seat.  
"Y'know, after the whole candy incident, I thought it'd only be fair to "spice" things up with a little peruvian trap...lesson be learned, Robert. Don't ever mess with The Rydli."  
[le end]

"And with that, the day concludes. Where will the haikuers go next? Who will win the cook-off? Will there be memes? The answer to all of these questions is yes. Tune in next time on HAIKU! DRAMA! WORLD TOUR!" Admin signed off.

End of Day 4  
Initiation at 5.26%  
1-4-13-9-14 / 1-14-4 / 2-12-15-15-2-5-18-18-9 / 8-1-22-5 / 1 / 8-9-19-20-15-18-25


	3. Swastika Shnitzel

Chapter 3: Swastika Schnitzel

Rydli was lifting weights with Marrowsky.

"Nice abs, bro." Rydli complimented, lifting a 5 lb dumbbell.  
"Thanks, Rydli." Marrowsky replied.  
"Oh Marrowsky, stop, you're making me blush" Rydli laughed.  
"Oh. K."

In the loser department, Stickboy was sleeping on the floor and Sam was doing push-ups next to him. GingeraleDragon was drawing Lapras porn in his notebook. He put his hand on the drawing and sighed.

"That's a cool drawing" Lemon said nicely.  
"Shut up Lemon" Nicholas said.  
"Lemon suck my cock" Riley suggested.  
"Riley, I" Lemon said.  
"Holy shit I almost had a sexual outbreak" Riley shouted.  
"Holy shit I almost had a sexual outbreak" Mike repeated.  
"Where do you guys think we'll be going next?" Alice the animal asked.  
"Shut up filthy sjw" Gingerale smecked her.

[Alice in le confession toilet]  
"Screw this! I wish I was on the other team they have Luke, Pantz, Ziggy and Jamie I bet they are having lots of fun with each other."  
[le end]

Meanwhile in first class, some haikuers were enjoying themselves in massage chairs.

"Wanna hear a joke?" Ziggy asked.  
"No." Cloud replied.  
"What did wojak say to Mr. Krabs? Are you feeling it Mr. Krabs? top laugh" Ziggy said  
"Retarded joke" Cloud said.  
"Wait why did wojak ask Mr. Krabs that?" Kirby asked.

Rydli took a break from weightlifting and glimpsed over to see Luke sitting by himself staring out a plane window.

"Isn't it odd how Lukeguy is so quiet lately?" Rydli asked the three.  
"No stop talking" Cloud commanded.  
"Kys Rydli" Ziggy said.  
"Fuck your guys I can't go five minutes on this plane without someone shitposting me or telling me to die I'm so fucking mad I'm gonna go stretch my legs so I won't be mad" Rydli stormed off.  
"oh" DaUser said.

Ziggy walked up to Luke.

"Hey hey Luke-chan wanna have lunch with me w" Ziggy asked.  
"No" Luke said.  
"Ok ok then anime smirk you'll come around" Ziggy said, walking away.

Element woke up to find Shinxy snuggling with him.

"Ahh! I'm not gay!" Element fell off his chair.  
"What's that? You're gay! HA! Rekt! trolololololololol!" Joe screamed and ran around in circles.  
"The bloody hell I am, m8" Element crossed his arms.  
"The bloody hell I am, m8" Cloud repeated.  
"The bloody hell I am, m8" Ziggy repeated.  
"The bloody hell I am, m8" Jacob repeated.  
"I miss Ziggy" Bless said.  
"Ugh fuck Bless he messed it up AS USUAL" Cloud sloughed.  
"Fuck you guys you're only furthering my point that Haikik is shit." Element said.  
"The bloody hell I am, m8" Mike repeated, burning a picture of Rydli in the process.  
"Mike! Haha my bro, you are the best dude. I've always admired you and I always will..." Element said.  
"Mike go back to the loser department with the other stinky losers" DryBones said.  
"Ok Andre!" Mike said.  
"Come on Mike, together we will Dominate This Game" Nicholas said.  
"Yass!" Mike said, and he and Nicholas walked off together with their tongues wrestling erotically.

[Element in le confession toilet]  
"Man, it really fucking sucks to fucking not have fucking Nicholas, Moogle, Mike, OR Gingerale on my fucking team. I don't even have Blooberri! I'm fucking angry! Gonna go angryphent on this botch zoemoeje AHAHAHAHAHNNNNNL"  
[le end]

"Alright passengers, prepare for landing. We're about to land at our 3rd destination!" Admin announced over the loudspeaker.

"All this flying is making me..." Eden puked on DaUser's new white shoes.  
"What the heck" DaUser said.

The Troll Slaiyers and Team Jacob all hopped off the plan to see the current location, a snowy area with mountains all around.

"Welcome to-" Admin began.  
"ooOHhHhhH! This must be the German Alps! You know what that means right? Yodeledy yodeledy yodeledehoo!" J yodeled.  
"Right. Okay. Anyways, yes. We are here in Germany!" Admin proclaimed.  
"Minty" Mike exclaimed.  
"Explain again why we needed to bring Gordon Ramsay along with us?" Pseudonym asked.  
"For the cook-off bitch." Imboo said.  
"Yeah fool. After I win this thing I'll be Haiku Drama's new chef" Gordon Ramsay said.  
"Fuck you Hordon Shamay" Sam flipped him off.

The teams were guided to two tables for them to sit at.

"Now, Germany is known for its traditional beer festival, Oktoberfest" Admin began.  
"Wait, but everyone here is underage. This is kinda illegal" ToastWolf said.  
"Hey I don't care. The first challenge today will consist of chugging ten 16 oz cups of alcohol. Each team will have one designated driver to guide them during the second challenge."

"Hmm. I think it'd only be fear to let our youngest member, DryBones, be assi-" Rydli began.  
"It should be Luke" Ziggy said.  
"Why..." Luke asked.  
"Because I like chicken" Bless said.  
"Fnaf and minions porn?! Gay minion yaoi, SPLATFEST CONFIRMED" Carz screamed.  
"Alright, alright, Luke it is. And Jacobs?" Admin asked.  
"I nominate Blooberri" Sunnia said.  
"Oh shucks, Sunnia" Blooberri replied.  
"Alright, they have been chosen! In the next part of the challenge, you must make a sausage at least 50 pounds in weight and carry it up the snowy mountain." Admin explained.  
"50 pounds? Weak. Make it something challenging like 100, I expected better from you Admin." Rydli said.  
"Alright fine, you'll have to make the sausage 200 pounds then." Admin corrected.  
"FUCK YOU RYDLI" Riley screamed.  
"#fuckrydli2015" Cloud said.

[Rydli in le confession toilet]  
"It may look like I screwed up back there, but this is all actually part of my plan! 200 lbs will be nothing for me. The Jacobs on the other hand? Ha."  
[le end]

"So, everyone ready?" Admin asked.

Everyone looked at their cups uncertainly.

"Ready, set!" Admin said.  
"Well, time to destroy my liver" Pseudonym said.  
"Go!"

The challenge began and all of the haikuers began gulping down their first cup of beer.  
Sam chugged each cup in five seconds before moving on to the next.  
StarForce took tiny sips.  
J was wasted after the first cup.

"You're all the very ducking best April major her kicking teammates Ibe ever gotten my balls into" J dropped his head on the table.

Marrowsky slurped down his third cup and crushed it off his head.

"Marrowksy is co cool I wanna touch his Bob" J laughed.  
"I..uh...don't know if I should do this..." DryBones said nervously.  
"Here DryBones I'll help you" Grenade said, pouring the beer in DryBones' mouth.  
"Oh...it tastes like pee..." DryBones shuttered, quenching more.

GingeraleDragon poured two cups at a time down his mouth.

"INAMM NRBEB KOFJ FUCK YO MORHA LAMAOALALAOAOAOAOAOA GER ME A CHARIZARD I WAKNABSHCK SLME DICK " Gingerale screamed, falling on the table.

Mike extended his mouth and ate all the cups with the alcohol in them at once.  
Berserker quickly wolfed down three cups at a time.

"IiiiiiiiiiiiiziiiiijjzjjjzjzjzjzjxjxjxxxxjxjjdjdskdosjjjsziIjjNabdbcnckxOjj WOOOOOOO LET's GETBMAKED" Kirby screamed.  
"Same" DaUser said.

Sam and Rydli finished their last cups at the same time and ran over to the sausage making station, where they were stopped by Admin.

"Uh uh ah, you also need to resume this challenge wearing lederhosen" Admin said, holding two pairs in his hand.  
"Whatever bro let me at it" Sam said, snatching the hosen from his hands and quickly putting them on right then and there.

Pseudonym and Marrowsky finished next and walked over to to Rydli.  
Pseudonym looked over at Sam wearing the lederhosen.

"Nice" he said.

Riley, Alice, Lemon, and Reu quickly finished and ran over. There was a large meat grinder connected to a tube for the sausage meat to fall into.

"Doesn't look like it'll take too long" Lemon said. They all picked up shoves and started throwing meat into the grinder.

"Pdfdffff you know his is like a le penis joke in here somewhere? Right hahahaahaaha oh my fishy" Riley fell over.

"Do you think we could kill someone if we shoved them in the grinder?" Eden asked.  
"Let's find out" Nicholas said, pushing Jacob into his team's grinder.  
"Ahhhbbbb!" Jacob screamed as he fell into the grinder with all of the other meat.  
"It's ok he's gay he'll like it in there" Cloud said.  
"Whoa it looks fun in there haha I wanna check it out" Joe said, leaping into the grinder.  
"Ok lol" Cloud said.

"Blooberir your so good at being good and your nice and going lahahahah Iblike you so much hahaabbzzbz..." J fell over on top of Bloo.

[J in le confession toilet]  
"Hey, at least I'm the nice kind of drunk! That's good!"  
[le end]

"In gonna fun rhythm le decib hah...oh" ToastWolf burped and fell over.

[Mr. Moogle in le confession toilet]  
"My father works at a brewery. I'm not sure how that will help me here but I wanted to note that"  
[le end]

"Oh...Ibdont feel so good..." StarForce hiccuped upon seeing all of the sausage meat, he then barfed into the grinder.  
"Nice one, StarForce, y-you re-really nai BURRORPL that one there" Stickboy burped.

Jacob climbed out of the sausage tube panting heavily.

"He's panting so much because he just made love to all the meat" Pantz said, and everyone laughed.  
"Hey!" Jacob said like a pussy.

After some more meat grinding, both teams had their huge sausage ready. They pushed them onto a large scale and weighed over 200 lbs each.

"Great. Now bring them to the top of the mountain" Admin commanded.  
"This looks so heavy though..." Shinxy said, knocking on the pile of meat.  
"There are 19 of us. It will only be like 10 or so lbs for each one" Rydli explained.  
"Oh thanks, I guess that makes me fell better w" Shinxy said.  
"There goes that Rydli again using his advanced math techniques" Element sighed.  
"Element what is the square route of 64?" Jp asked.  
"How the fuck should I bloody know do I look like a mathematician to you?" Element snapped.  
"Just checking..." Jp said.  
"Steady now...steady now..." Jacob said, guiding all of the pushers as he stood in front of the sausage.  
"Wait not so fast!" Jacob panicked, clinging to his stomach as he felt a sharp pain, he fell down and the sausage toppled over and crushed him.

"Gingerale, you can take your Charizard hat off. It looks kinda...dumb with the feathered cap placed on top of it" Mr. Moogle said.  
"Fuck YOU MOGOLE ILL DO WHATEVER THE FUCK I LLEAS EOWTH MAH DHAIRC HAT CUIRIFIEIRI WREE REEEEE" Charizard screamed, slapping Moogle.  
"Kupo..." Moogle said.  
"IM GENESISFRENZY IM gonna be internet famous one day look at me woooowooowopoeooo hahaja sonic suck my dick everyone!" Riley screamed over the mountain tops.

Luke sighed looking at Riley.

"Oh what was tat both? You think your better than me bro! Oh?" Riley asked, stepping up to Luke.  
"Riley, go away..." Luke pleaded quietly.  
"Oh, I see how it is..." Riley said, taking off his lederhosen and short, revealing his scrawny pale white skin.  
"You wanna go?" Riley asked, holding his fists up.

Luke looked at the ground sweating anxiously.  
Riley swung a first at the ground and missed.  
Luke envisioned the battlefield and studied the posture of Riley's body, in a frantic feral-like state. He scanned the landscape and nearby rocks and mountains to use as obstacles.  
He ran up to Riley screaming like an ape and clawed at him and threw out random kicks and punches. He brought his fist down over and over again on his back and took a bite out of Riley's foot. Riley tried to push Luke away but Puke kept clawing at him and started strangling him. Marrowksy and Kirby had to pull Luke off of him. Riley was crying, his bloody (not the British bloody) face beaten to a pulp.

[Riley in le confession toilet]  
"Now you may think I got beat up back there. But I wasn't prepared for they fight. I'll get Luke back one day, just wait...Maybe if Luke can take his fucking hand out of his pants, I can be in the chat with no problems"  
[le end]

"Push! Push!" Isaac yelled, and Team Jacob continued to use all their might in pushing the sausage up the hill.

Sam tied himself to the sausage so he could carry it like a bobsled. He got on all fours in the snow and ran as fast as he could, moving the sausage behind him as the team pushed.

As the Troll Slaiyers pushed their sausage up the mountain, Shinxy imagined the sausage as Element's penis and came.

"Look at my dick Elent faps to e621" Carz screamed, making the mountains rumble a bit.  
"Quiet, Carz. If we're too loud we might cause an avalanche" Jp said.

Ding!

"No!" DryBones said.  
"That's right, song time! And be careful not to cause an avalanche" Admin warned.  
"Hey, maybe we can sing to a classical tune!" Mr. Moogle suggested.  
"Haha of course you would want that I bet you'd like your pony waifu to play the violin as we sing too..." Nicholas said.  
"Did someone say ponies!?" ToastWolf asked eagerly.  
"Just sing already" Admin said impatiently.

[Song #3 - Avalanche Aversion]  
In the tune of Eine Kleine Nachtmusik  
Rydli: Push, it more, so we can go ahead  
Eden: I wish, we could, ride this like a sled  
Riley: My face, hurts very very bad. That fight made me mad!  
Lemon: That wasn't very rad  
StarBird: No kidding  
Stickboy: I just want these dumb clothes off my dumb body  
Grenade: I, think, Bless pooped his pants  
Cloud: More like Pantz  
Pantz: Hey let's do a German dance  
Pantz does a German dance.  
Kirby: Wait, is, Gantz still a thing?  
Jacob makes muffled noises under the sausage to the tune.  
Element: I don't want to sing  
Luke: My, saus-age is big  
Bless: Shut up nig  
Carz: Oh my Shrek fuck you, you, you!  
GingeraleDragon: Keep, it up, I don't want to lose!  
Mr. Moogle: Calm down, fear not, don't submit to all the booze  
Sam: I AM, FUCKING AWESOME  
Jacobs: Ssh!  
Reu: Awesome at being loud  
Blooberri: I think it's cute  
Alice: Shut up it's not  
Nicholas: I volunteer Sam to be crucified  
Sunnia: Blah, blah, blah blah blah  
Robot: I say hoo hah  
Berserker: Did cloud did Mewtwo  
Mike: haha!  
Marrowsky: Don't, stop, keep going harder now  
J: Marrowksy is...so cute wow...  
Shinxy: Yiff yiff make me go meow, meow, meow w  
Pseudonym: Come on, move on, up the mountaintop we go  
Jp: Um guys, look out, mountain goat after you  
A mountain goat leaps on DryBones and starts chewing on his head.  
DryBones: Ahhhh, I could really go, for a toilet now!  
Joe: Haha wow!  
Ziggy: Topkek I say!  
DaUser: We're winning yay  
Sam lunges forward and his team's sausage begins to pass the Troll Slaiyers, getting closer to the mountaintop.  
Isaac: We, are, almost, there!  
ToastWolf: Finally we're here! Kick it in high gear! Is that a deer? Oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear...  
The sausage runs over the deer.  
StarForce: To victory!  
The mountain rumbles, the Avalanche starts, and all of the haikuers and their sausages are toppled over by snow.  
[le big finish]

The haikuers popped their heads out of the snow. The finish line was at the top of a 20 ft slope.

"Throw me up there..." Sam said, tying himself to the sausage.  
"Uh, what? How strong do you think we are?" Alice asked.  
"We're gonna have to pull it up from the slope." Moogle said.  
"Anyone have a pic of Ampharos sighing?" Nicholas asked.

On the other team, 18 were pulling the sausage up the slope, having it tied to a rope.  
Jacob fell off the sausage as it was lifted from the ground.

"Jacob, stop laying around and help pulling!" Joe yelled from the top.

Jacob panted heavily as he got to the back and pulled with the rest of the team.

The two teams continued to pull. Rydli glanced over and noticed Team Jacob was getting closer to the finish line. Rydli rolled up his sleeves and kicked in his super miss led and pulled with all his might, the sausage slid up the snow and across the finish line, winning them the challenge.

"And Troll Slaiyers win...an advantage in the next challenge!" Admin declared.  
"I hope the advantage is good" Marrowksy remarked, dusting off his lederhosen and straightening his shades.  
"Fuck" Gingerale said.  
"What's the next challenge, Admin?" Isaac asked.  
"Hold on, I need to get the preparations ready" Admin said.  
"In the meantime, enjoy some lunch by chef Imboo and Gordon Ramsay"  
"Yes" Imboo said.  
"Troll Slaiyers can have Gordon Ramsay food, and Team Jacob can have Imboo food" Admin said, making the Jacobs moan.

The teams were eating their bratwursts, and Nicholas sat next to Gingerale and Moogle.

"Is it me, or is Sam really, really-hic-annoying?" Gingerale asked.  
"Sam? Nah, he's a good player." Mr. Moogle said.  
"So good, he made it all the way to the final five in HDI. In fact, me and Moogly did too..." Nicholas said.  
"If we all work together, we could make it very far this season" Mr. Moogle said.  
"Yeah, like an alliance!" Gingerale said.  
"Ok first off who included you and second I Don't Know An Alliance Could Be Dangerous" Nicholas said.  
"How? It's not like everyone can hear what our plans are and act against it" Gingerale said.  
"Hey Einstein, try discussing your plans not a-at a table with everyone else right n-next to y-yOOOOu." Stickboy burped.  
"We must end Stickboy" Nicholas said.  
"I still don't know half of the people here" Riley complained with his head on the table.  
"Would it help if I gave a rundown of everyone here and explained what they are all like?" Alice asked.  
"Yeah, that would be cool!" Riley said.  
"Oh well I don't want to" Alice said.

Admin blew a horn, causing the haikuers to plug their ears.

"Alright everyone, the time for the second challenge is here. As promised, Troll Slaiyers get an advantage: gas masks." Admin announced, passing one to each of the 19 Troll Slaiyers.  
"Gas masks? What kind of challenge is this?" Jacob asked.  
"Now there are two chambers, one for each team. Get in and I will tell you what to do over a loudspeaker." Admin explained.

Team Jacob walked into the chamber on the left and Troll Slaiyers walked into the chamber on the right wearing gas masks.

"It's kinda dark in here..." Sunnia said.

Gas was released into both of the chambers and all of Team Jacob coughed violently. The haikuers started falling to the ground coughing up blood. Reu held his chest as it erupted in pain, falling to his knees in pain. ToastWolf tried to hold her breath but fainted. StarForce, Lemon, and Isaac were screaming, banging their fists off the door on desperation to escape. The air grew foggier and the three slowly fell, their eyelids dropping and their coughs growing stronger. Isaac's hand slowly fell from the door's window.  
Meanwhile with the Troll Slaiyers, everyone was standing around bored with their gas masks on.  
Sam ran headfirst into the door multiple times, trying to break it down. Each time he got more and more tired, by the fifth he was on his knees panting.  
Mike was looking around, unaffected by the gas. Berserker and Robot were too. Berserker shot a beam at the door and it reflected off it and struck GingeraleDragon's butt. Mike grabbed Sam and Robot, running straight into the door and knocking it down. Mike, Robot, and Berserker grabbed all of the bodies and dragged them out of the chamber to get fresh air. They started breathing normally again.

"Swastikal" Mike exclaimed.  
"Actually, not very swastikal, Mike. Your team lost. The challenge was to stay in the gas chamber the longest. You know what that means? Team Jacob is sending someone home...again!" Admin exclaimed.  
"Yay!" Troll Slaiyers cheered.  
"What! They had gas masks for the challenge! That's hardly fair" Isaac complained.  
Team Jacob was muttering with complaints.  
"Settle down everyone, the decision is final. Team Jacob, get ready to pick someone to boot." Admin said.  
"What a lame episode" Stickboy rolled his eyes.  
"Aaaahaahb$.$.$.$.8..?..$" Riley shouted from the ground.

That night, the plane was flying through the sky. Team Jacob was in the elimination room once more while the Troll Slaiyers were enjoying themselves in first class.

"Welcome back, losers. You've all casted your votes, and I have the results right here" Admin said, holding passports in his hand.  
"I have 18 Mountain Dew cans, but there are only 19 of you. One of you will be dropping out of here and ending your world tour right here and now. And you can't come back, ever..." Admin said.

Most of the Jacobs looked confident in their safety, though J and Isaac looked anxious as usual.

[Riley in le confession toilet]  
"I don't know who half of these are...Luke isn't here so I'll just not vote..."  
[le end]

[StarBird in le confession roilet]  
"Mm..."  
StarBird stamps someone's passport.  
[le end]

[Reu in le confession toilet]  
"I'm not sure who to vote for...no one really sticks out for me...hmm..."  
[le end]

"Safe tonight are...Nicholas,  
Sam,  
Blooberri,  
Mr. Moogle,  
Isaac,  
Madorky,  
Reu,  
Robot,  
StarForce,  
Sunnia,  
Berserker,  
Stickboy,  
StarBird,  
J-zizzle,  
aaaaaaand Mike" Admin announced, with each contestant grabbing their Mountain Dew after hearing their names called.  
GingeraleDragon, ToastWolf, Riley, and Lemon were left.

Lemon's eyes blushed, ToastWolf sweated nervously as she stared at the Mountain Dew cans, Riley hunched over, and Gingerale had his arms crossed impatiently.

"The next Mountain Dew goes...to Gingerale." Admin said, tossing one to Gingerale, who grinned.  
"Look out Lapras, I'm coming for ya!" he shouted.  
"Whatever, dude. Also safe is Lemon" Admin said.  
"Yes!" Lemon said happily.

It was down to ToastWolf and Riley.

"So, who will the final Mountain Dew go to?" Admin asked, tossing the can up and down.  
"ToastWolf, the uber fan? Or Riley, the 300 subscribers YouTube superstar?"

ToastWolf was biting her nails, Riley fell down.

"The final can goes, to..."

The team was getting impatient, Lukeguy peeked his head into the room to see the results.

"Riley!" Admin said cheerfully, throwing the can at Riley's head.  
"Woohoo! GenesisFrenzy for the win! I'm gonna be YouTube famous one day, believe it!" he cheered.  
"Congrats, Riley" Alice said.

Riley opened his Mountain Dew can and it sprayed all over his face.

"What? Me? Why?! My super fan knowledge on everything could help you guys!" ToastWolf pleaded.

Luke sighed and walked back to first class.

"SHUT UP BEFORE I FIST YOU WOMAN" Sam threatened.  
"ToastWolf, the drop of shame awaits" Admin said, holding out her parachute.  
"But, guys, we didn't find Rhythm yet! Remember that, that's my thing. Finding Rhythm. You guys need me if you want to find him! How about a Finding Rhythm With ToastWolf spinoff?" ToastWolf begged.  
"Yeaaaah, we already found Rhythm." Admin said, pushing ToastWolf towards the door.  
"Oh. In that case the entire thing was a joke. I wasn't serious. Trolled!" ToastWolf said.  
"Yeah yeah we get the references, just leave already" Stickboy said.

ToastWolf was pushed out of the plane, screaming as she plummeted to the snowy alps below.

"Ruhe in Stücken!" Admin shouted to her.  
"Wait, did you really find Rhythm?" Lemon asked.  
"That's for me to know and you to find out" Admin said.  
"Wait who won the cook-off?" Blooberri asked.  
"Oh was that supposed to actually be a thing? Sounds like it'd just end in a cliche where Ramsay's cooking is better but Imboo wins because bad food is what I want to feed you all." Admin said.  
"What the fuck?! So what happens to me?" Gordon Ramsay asked.  
"Yeah you overstayed your welcome, so..." Admin scratched his back, then pushed Ramsay out of the plane.

"You did really good in the challenge today, Moogle." Robot complimented.  
"Thanks, Dawg. My dad's a homebrewer..." Moogle noted.  
"Oh, I thought he worked at a brewery." Robot said.  
"Huh? Oh no just a slip up I made in my con...fessional..." Moogle said with a hint of suspicious in his voice.  
"Robot, how did you know I said that?" MOGOLE asked.  
"What, I. Uh, I gotta go..." Robot said, walking away.

[Mr. Moogle in le confession toilet]  
"Well that was weird. It's almost as if Robot saw my confessional"  
[le end]

[Robot in le confession toilet]  
"Bleep. Get it because I usually say beep? That was good I'm gonna write this down"  
[le end]

"Well that concludes today's episode. We are down to 37 haikuers. Tune in next time for more haiku, more drama, and more WORLD TOUR!" Admin signed off.

[Bless in le confession toilet]  
Bless is crying.  
"I never told ToastWolf how I felt..."  
[le end]

[Rydli in le confession toilet]  
Rydli chuckles.  
"Oh I didn't do anything, I just like chuckling."  
Rydli lifts his 5 lb dumbbell some more.  
[le end]

In some dungeon, nazis were standing around a table. On the table was a cyborg body. It stood up awake, which shocked the nazis.

"Es lebt!" one of them shouted, pointing at Gordon Ramsay's cyborg body.  
"Hahaa? It appears I was life brought back by the nazi of power electricity power parts?" Gordon Ramsay exclaimed.

Gordon Ramsay looked around at the nazis surrounding him.

"OOOOO! shitty Germans? So it appears, German science is the strongest in the world!" he shrieked.  
"Now, nazis, bros. Can I call you brozis? Gordon Nazis sounds nice too. Anyway, I request your help. I want to bloody fucking destroy Haiku Drama!"

End of Day 8  
Initiation at 7.9%  
9 / 23-15-14-4-5-18 / 23-8-1-20 / 10-1-18-5-4 / 8-1-19 / 2-5-5-14 / 4-15-9-14-7


	4. Furry in de Nile

Chapter 4: Furry in de Nile

[DryBones in le confession toilet]  
"Ew, this room is so small and smelly. Did you know in Japan, there are toilets with heated seats, proximity sensors, germ-resistant surfaces, and music players? Anyways, I digress...actually I forgot why I came in here."  
[le end]

"Imagine doing Jabba the Hutt right after a shower" J said.  
"Uh, what?" StarBird asked, sitting next to him.  
"J shut up" GingeraleDragon barked. Like a fucking dog.  
"I'm feeling pretty good so far. Three challenges in and I haven't been eliminated. This is great" Isaac smiled.  
"Ehhhh you would think that" Nicholas said dully, smoking a cigarette backwards.  
"Huh?"  
"Keep it up and we just may get rid of you, unless you can prove you're not deadweight...the longer you're hair the less we have to pick off they're you'll have to prove you're an asset ehhhh" Nicholas crossed his arms, smoking his backwards cigarette some more.  
"Losing two out of three challenges isn't exactly something to be excited about" Mr. Moogle agreed.  
"Well stop BITCHING and get WORKIN SLUTS" Sam roared, running in circles doing jumping jacks.

[Riley in le confession toilet]  
"Yo! GenesisFrenzy here. So I survived over 10 days of Haikucon. My team already lost two competitors, and I actually got some votes in the last episode. If I don't start working hard, they might throw me off next...but that won't happen. For I am the man who will be YouTube famous. Isn't that right Shadow?"  
Riley held the Shadow the Hedgehog plush in his right hand and made him cross his arms.  
"Hmf"  
"Yeah! After all, I need to prove to all my friends that I'm...uh actually never mind about that."  
[le end]

Alice was sitting with Blooberri, Sunnia, Lemon, and StarForce. Berserker was sitting at the corner of the table.

"So, what's up guys?" Alice asked.  
"UGHGHHH" Sunnia screamed, picking up her bowl of cereal and running away.  
"Looks like our challenge today will be in a desert" Lemon noted.  
"Really? What gave you that idea?" StarForce pondered.

Lemon pointed out the window where they could see a sea of sand.

[Alice in le confession toilet]  
"Man, it's been kinda boring recently. Remember back in season one when I was the party animal? Haha what a character. But now? I'm becoming...le background character. I may end up in the same league as Grenade. GRENADE! It's time to get serious"  
[le end]

"Hey Alice wanna go fart in jars and give them to people?" Riley asked.  
"Yes!" Alice said, getting up excitedly and leaving with Riley.  
"Well, I gotta go turn on my turtle filter" Berserker said, getting up and walking away.

StarForce and Lemon were the last at the table.

"Hey. Lemon. Pssssssst" StarForce whispered.  
"StarForce no one else is here there's no need to whisper." Lemon said.  
"Lemon, I was wondering how you felt about almost getting eliminated last time? Aren't you nervous about the challenge..." StarForce asked.  
"Oh yeah, someone voted for me. Anger! :(. But whatever, I'm still here that's all that matters" Lemon shrugged.

Back in first class, Cloud and Jacob were in a heated argument.

"Dude, I'm telling you. Margaret is fucking hot. I'm willing to bet Mordecai will be with her by the end of the show" Cloud yelled.  
"Uh, well Cloudy Jay is better for Mordecai! And what is Margaret? A bird. What are you, a bird fucker? Bird fucker! I bet you like to suck Falco's cock too! C-cloudy Jay is cuter..." Jacob defended.  
"Ok first Falco's cock is irrelevant. Secondly look at this

You see that hot rack? Who wouldn't want to fuck that?" Cloud asked.  
"Bird fucker! Bird fucker!" Jacob screamed.  
"At least I'm not attracted to Clouds!" Cloud snapped back.  
"s-shut up you Baka..." Jacob said nervously.  
"Hey, man. Everyone should just mellow out. You guys are giving off a bad vibe, man. Let's just chill..." Pantz suggested, smoking some weed.

[Jacob in le confession toilet]  
"Well, he never denied enjoying Falco cock"  
[le end]

Cloud just sighed.  
Ma'am while, Element was sleeping in his chair. Shinxy was humping his leg.  
The Troll Slaiyers were alerted by the sound of a doorbell. Marrowsky walked over to the door leading to the mess hall, where a pizza delivery guy was standing.

"How did he...get here?" Eden asked.  
"Dominos raided their budget for flight deliveries?" Marrowsky suggested.  
"Heeeeeeey, did somebody order a pizzzzzzaaaaaaaa, with Xtra, Xtra, Xtra cheeeeeese" the pizza delivery guy asked, changing his seducial pose with each word.  
"No! And I don't really care for morons like you! Now SCRAT!" Cloud screamed, punching the pizza delivery guy who tripped back about 200 steps and then fell out the door with the pizza in hand.  
"Really dude? There goes our pizza..." Pantz sighed.  
"Yeah, pizza!" Ziggy agreed, folding his arms.  
"Attention passengers! We will be landing soon! Get ready for departure" Admin announced over the intercom.  
"Hopefully this will be more exciting than the half hour anti-drinking ad of an episode last week" Pseudonym said.

The ground rumbled and the haikuers quickly lost balance, falling to the floor and sliding around as he plane did a 90 degree left turn. Everyone shrieked as they flew out the plane and plummeted below.

"Woo!" Joe screamed excitedly as she fell face first into the sand.

The rest of the haikuers quickly joined her in the sand. The 37 haikuers landed throughout a small area of desert. Shortly after, the plane landed smoothly and Admin and Imboo hopped out.  
The haikuers began to regain themselves, getting up from the sand and dusting theirselves off. Reu helped Blooberri and Sunnia up.

"Ladies first" he smiled, tipping his hat as he pulled them up.

Sunnia blushed and Bloo smiled.  
Reu helped Lemon up too.

"I like girls" Lemon said quickly.

Riley got up excitedly.

"Wow! I got all of that on camera! It will look so cool when I upload it to my channel!" Riley said excitedly, phone in hand.

Then Alice flew down and landed on Riley, crushing him. Then she farted on him.

Everyone lined up side by side as Admin was carried over. Wearing a pharaoh hat, sandals, and no shirt, he was sitting relaxingly in a litter, carried by interns Parascout and Faline.

"Hey, Parascout! So, you've been reduced to an intern, eh?" Grenade asked with a Canadian accent.  
"Apparently my performances in the last two seasons quote on quote weren't the best, but whatever. How did someone like Eden who hasn't been relevant since Haikustuck get on but not me?" Parascout sighed.

Eden's jaw dropped, then she looked down and sighed.

"Because she showed up to Haikucon and you didn't" Jp defended.  
"Fine with me, I can only deal with so many weirdos" Gingerale scoffed.  
"Pssst, who is Parascout?" Jacob whispered to Kirby.  
"Jacob, Parascout has been in the Kik chat for months. What are you, Oscar? Haha Oblivious Oscar reference" Cloud laughed.  
"What, I don't get it?" Kirby scratched their head.  
"Ah, Kik and their shitty devs. Did you know Kik for Windows phones hasn't been updated since 2012?" Riley asked.  
"No. Because no one cares." Nicholas said.  
"Owned..." Gingerale said, putting his hand up for a high fave, but Nicholas was too cool for that.  
"Speaking of haikuers who didn't show up for Haikucon, anyone know what happened to Charly?" Mr. Moogle asked.  
"Apparently he got arrested for willingly looking at child porn and stealing cancer fund donations." Pantz said.  
"Freak" Alice folded her arms.  
"Men." Riley said.  
"What's porn?" DryBones asked.  
"Alright, alright. Shut up already. Speaking of haikuers, today we will feature our first guest star!" Admin proclaimed.  
"Really? Is it Rhythm?" Mr. Moogle asked.  
"A Melee challenge on the horizon, perhaps? Might I suggest a Roy doubles tournament?" Rydli said.  
"No...it isn't Rhythm. Today, our guest star is...none other than...the one and only...Lek!" Admin announced excitedly, and Lek came falling from the sky, body slamming into the sand.  
"Who the FUCK is Lek?" Sam shouted.  
"Some furry from the Kik group. Riley met him in a Skullgirls chat" Alice explained.  
"Actually, I am not a furr!" he mumbled, pointing a finger up with his head still in the sand.  
"Is that GenesisFrenzy? YouTube superstar? Oh my gosh dude I'm a huge fan!" Lek squealed.  
"Oh my Arceus enough Riley screen time" Gingerale complained.  
"You see, after the producers and I were up all night coming up with this brilliant episode title, Furry in de Nile, we needed a furry that fit the name." Admin explained  
"You couldn't find any other furry? How about Marrowsky?" StarForce suggested.  
"Not in denial, Einstein" Stickboy said.  
"Element?" StarForce suggested.  
"Since when have I been in denial? Everyone knows I jerk it to yiff erry day, yo" Element said.  
"Oh I know you do, hehe~" Shinxy giggled, making Element take a few steps away from him.

[Berserker in le confession toilet]  
"Great, a furry episode, this is gonna be terrible! I hate furries!"  
Berserker sighed.  
[le end]

"Uh, actually, I'm not a furry. To put it in short, I like anthropomorphic art and characters, but I dislike the furry community. I find them cringey and weird. I still have a liking to anime furries, or "kemono", and even have my own kemono character" Lek explained as he dusted himself off.  
"Uh, actually, I'm not a furry. To put it in short, I like anthropomorphic art and characters, but I dislike the furry community. I find them cringey and weird. I still have a liking to anime furries, or "kemono", and even have my own kemono character" Luke repeated.  
"Uh, actually, I'm not a furry. To put it in short, I like anthropomorphic art and characters, but I dislike the furry community. I find them cringey and weird. I still have a liking to anime furries, or "kemono", and even have my own kemono character" Cloud repeated.  
"Uh, actually, I'm not a furry. To put it in short, I like anthropomorphic art and characters, but I dislike the furry community. I find them cringey and weird. I still have a liking to anime furries, or "kemono", and even have my own kemono character" Alice repeated.  
"Uh, actually, I'm not a furry. To put it in short, I like anthropomorphic art and characters, but I dislike the furry community. I find them cringey and weird. I still have a liking to anime furries, or "kemono", and even have my own kemono character" Mike repeated.  
"Shut up shut up! Stop with the shitposts!" Element plugged his ears.  
"Shut up shut up! Stop with the shitposts!" Mike repeated.  
"Haha that's classic Mike, you're the best man." Element laughed.  
"Anyways, I know your feel bro. Furries, weird. But the porn, feisty..." Element said, putting a hand on Lek's shoulder.  
"O, k" Lek said nervously.

Shinxy gazed at Lek and blushed. Element looked over and noticed Shinxy staring at him.

"Feeling jealous, jellyment?" Ziggy asked.  
"No." Element replied.  
"So what's the point of this Lek guy being here?" Jp asked.  
"toplek" Ziggy said.  
"Really I just wanted some word play for the title. But Lek might as well be useful. He'll help come up with today's challenge, which I forgot to mention, takes place in-"  
"Egypt!" J finished.  
"Nice one, J. Someone knows where the Nile is" Admin said sarcastically.  
"Egypt, huh? Good thing I brought my tinfoil hat so the aliens can't read my brains." Isaac said.  
"Aliens?" Mr. Moogle arched a brow.  
"Don't doubt them. The answer is out there..." Berserker said.  
"Well then Lek, any ideas for our competitors to face?" Admin asked.  
"Hmm. What if they had to navigate through a maze in a pyramid? And the maze is randomly generated?" Lek suggested.  
"Alright, you heard the furry. Today's challenge will be a maze through a pyramid" Admin decided.  
"Well I'm not a fur-" Lek said before being pushed down by Admin.  
"Hey Lek who is hotter, Margaret or Cloudy Jay?" Cloud asked.  
"I don't find them attractive, I'm not a furry..." Lek said from the ground, spitting sand out.  
"Alright alright alright" Admin said with a Matthew McConaughey impression.  
"Carrying on, you will all split into teams of five, Troll Slaiyers will have one team of four and Team Jacob will have one team of three. After getting through the maze of the pyramid, you will find camels on the other side. There are four camels, so only half of the teams will be able to reach them. From there, it's a race to the Nile. Once there, the final challenge will begin to decide who wins and who goes home. But here's the catch, you can't start the final challenge until all of your team has made it to the Nile." Admin explained.

The haikuers looked around and thought in preparation.

"Well any questions?" Admin asked.  
"Which team am I on?" J asked.  
"J, really. Come on J." Nicholas sighed.  
"Maybe you should write a giant J on your face to remind you" Pseudonym suggested.  
"That's a good idea!" J said.

[J in le confession toilet]  
J scribbles a backwards J on his face with a sharpie.  
"Wait now how will I know if this stands for Jonah or Jacob...crap..."  
[le end]

"Hmm, me, Pantz, Ziggy, Luke, and..." Cloud counted, trying to think of a fifth.  
"Oh, oh! Me, me! You can count on me, dawg. I got your backs, yo." Jacob said, trying to sound cool.  
"Alright with me!" Ziggy said with a thumbs up.

"DryBones, Bless, Carz?" Grenade asked.  
"Sure." Bless said.  
"UGGGGHHHH taking a shit" Carz said as a turd fell out of his pants.  
"Cool!" DryBones said.  
"Count me in!" Joe said.  
"Joe..." Bless said.

"Hey Eden, we could go together" Jp suggested.  
"Alright" Eden said.  
"Oh oh me and DaUser can team up as well! Great!" Kirby said happily.  
"May I tag along, ladies and Kirby?" Rydli asked with a sexy smile.  
"Sure, Rydli..." Jp smiled, looking dreamily into his eyes.  
"Hey, bub. I'm a man" DaUser said.  
"Oh, apologizes." Rydli said, giving DaUser a friendly handshake.

"I guess that leaves Element, Shinxy, and Pseudo with me" Marrowsky said.  
"Not had, actually." Element said.  
"Can we have Lek too?" Shinxy asked excitedly, wagging his tail.  
"Shut up Shinxy you don't have a tail" Element complained.  
"Oh, that wasn't my tail hehe..." Shinxy said.  
"Uh...what?" Element asked.  
"Sure, whatever" Admin said, pushing Lek into the group of four. Shinxy hugged him tightly, squeezing him painfully.

"Well, Obviously me and Moogs def teaming up..." Nicholas said.  
"Of course. Also...how about Robot?" Mr. Moogle suggested.  
"Huh? Oh, ok sure" Robot said.

[Mr. Moogle in le confession toilet]  
"I want to keep a close eye on her..."  
[le end]

"And Mike! Gotta get that crazy kook in here!" Nicholas said.  
"And that leave some more..." Mr. Moogle said.  
"And that should definitely be-" Gingerale began.  
"Alice." Nicholas said.  
"Uh, bros. You're forgetting someone..." Gingerale said.  
"Me?" Alice said, puzzled.  
"Yup" Nicholas said.  
"Hmm...alright..." Alice said, walking over feeling suspicious.

"Wait, Alice. We're not going together?" Riley asked disappointedly.  
"You can be with us!" Lemon said cheerfully with Reu and Berserker.  
"Ok, that's four. The fifth?" Reu asked.

Lemon looked around to see StarBird standing around alone.

"How about StarBird? We should get to know each other more" Lemon suggested.  
"Alright." StarBird shrugged.  
"No chicks? Bummer..." Riley sighed.  
"If it's any consolation StarBird's gender is unconfirmed so he COULD be a girl!" Lemon said.

"Wait, who is my team then?" Gingerale asked.  
"We need one more" Isaac said, standing with Stickboy, J, and Sam, the latter was doing leg stretches with Rydli.  
"No..." Gingerale said, clenching his first and hiding his anger.

"So that leaves us?" StarForce said, standing next to Blooberri and Sunnia.  
"This will be cool" Sunnia said.

"So to recap, for the Troll Slaiyers we have Cloud, Ziggy, Jacob, Pantz, and Luke on one team.  
Jp, Eden, Kirby, DaUser, and Rydli on the second team.  
Grenade, DryBones, Carz, Bless, and Joe on the third team.  
Finally, lelement, Shinxy, Pseudonym, and Marrowksy on the fourth team with Lek joining for support.

For Team Jacob, we have Nicholas, Moogle, Robot, Alice, and Mike on one team.  
Lemon, Reu, Berserker, Riley, and StatBird on the second team.  
GingeraleDragon, Stickboy, Isaac, J, and Sam on the third time.  
And FINALLY finally, the fourth and final team consists of Blooberri, StarForce, and Sunnia.  
Get ready everyjuan, when I shoot this gun, the race through the maze pyramid is on!" Admin declared.

"aaaaand go!" admin yelled, shooting a flare which hit a bird.

The eight groups all ran into the pyramid, where several different paths awaited them behind ten different doors. Each group took a different door and down a different path.

Element, Marrowsky, Pseudonym, Shonxy, and Lek were in a seemingly bare room.

"Why am I here again?" Lek asked.  
"Lek 3" Shinxy said, hugging him tight.  
"Looks like a pretty straightforward room ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯" Element shrugged, stepping forward and activating a pressure plate.

Marrowsky quickly grabbed Element and pulled him down to the ground, where arrows flew over their heads and stuck to the wall behind them.  
Pseudonym walked over to an arrow shot in the wall and felt how sharp it was.

"Nice one" he complimented Element.  
"Element, you should stay back with that furry guy and Shinxy, you might get in our way" Marrowsky suggested.  
"Not a furry" Lek reminded.

[Element in le confession toilet]  
"You know what, I'm tired of always being treated as a joke. Everyone's always like "Oh there goes Element about to get tongue raped haha", or "Eow Element's such a dumbass!". Well you know why I say to that? Neigh! From here on out, everyone will start to see how truly capable I am. No one here at HDA will ever call me dumb again"  
[le end]

Element tightened his fedora. He then took Marrowsky's sunglasses off, revealing another pair of sunglasses under them. Element then put the sunglasses on himself but then immediately took them off because it made the floor hard to see. He scanned the floor and kept an eye out for the slightly elevated tiles and walked around hem. He kept maneuvering around them until he made it to the other side. Surprised, the rest of the group followed the same path he took until they made it safely across as well.

"Nice...non-sarcastically" Pseudonym complimented, giving Element a high five.  
"We did it Lek!" Shinxy shouted in glee, licking Lek.  
"WHO ARE YOU?" Lek shouted.  
"Alright guys we should get moving" Marrowsky said, starting to walk forward to the next room.  
"But I'm so tired ;-; can we take a break?" Shinxy asked.  
"If we take too long we won't have a camel which will mean even more walking" Marrowsky explained.  
"But that is then and I'm tired now!" Shinxy complained.  
"Lek why don't you carry Shinxy" Marrowsky suggested.  
"Oh...k" Lek said, and Shinxy hopped into Lek's arms happily.  
"Someone a little jealous?" Pseudonym teased Element.  
"Literally nothing I have done suggests that" Element replied.  
"Well we better get going" Martowsky said, and the five pressed on.

Lemon, Berserker, Reu, StarBird, and Riley were walking down a hall.

[Lemon in le confession toilet]  
"I chose StarBird to be in our group to see if I could get to know...him? Her? Whatever, more."  
[le end]

"Hey StarBird." Lemon greeted.  
"Yes?" StarBird asked.  
"How are you?"  
"Fine."  
"Cool...are you enjoying the trip so far?"  
"It is interesting even if I'm not one to usually participate in these."  
"That's good to-"  
"Ahhhh Lemon put your ass on my face" Riley pleaded.

Reu rolled his eyes. The five came to a door, leading to a pitch black room.  
Briefly after entering, jazzy music kicked in and neon lights flashed on.

"It's time to play...Pyramid!" a voice called out enthusiastically. It was a cardboard cutout of Mike Richards.  
"A game show? Neat" Lemon said optimistically.  
"What...is this?" Berserker asked, looking around.  
"I've seen this show before. One person has a word and the partner has to guess it based on descriptions" Reu explained.  
"In this game, one person has a word and the partner has to guess it based on descriptions! Our first two competitors, come right up!" Mike Richards cardboard cutout commanded.

Lemon and Riley walked over to their seats, which faced each other. Lemon had a screen in front of him for the word to be displayed.  
The group looked over to the huge pyramid structure with the categories imprinted on them. One on the top row, two in the middle, and three at the bottom.

"Your categories are, Coast to Coast, Up Up and Away, and The Rise and Fall of Communism" Mike Richards cardboard cutout announced.  
"I'll pick Up Up and Away" Lemon said.

The music looped and the nonexistent audience clapped as Lemon was given his first word, plane.

"Ok, we rode this to get here" Lemon hinted.  
"Helicopter" Riley guessed.  
"No..."  
"Uhhhh, men?"  
"No. Ok, it's big!"  
"My penis"  
"Why would that EVER be the answer!? It goes with trains and automobiles"  
"UUUUUHHHHHH I KNOW THIS...I do not"  
"Pass" the next word was helicopter.  
"Oh, you guessed this on the last try"  
"Men?"  
"No, the other"  
"I do not?"  
"NO"  
"My penis"  
"It hovers"  
"A plane"  
"PASS" the next word was Up.  
"Pixar movie that's sad"  
"Shrek"  
"No Riley. It has old people"  
"Microsoft word"  
"AND TIME IS UP. Lemon and Riley earned 0 points. Let's move on to our next competitors, Reu and Berserkeeeeeeeer!" Mike Richards cardboard cutout announced.

Reu chuckled, unlike Knuckles.

"We won't make such pitiful mistakes, right Berk?" Reu asked.  
"As long as you choose communism" Berserker said.  
"And the topic is Coast to Coast!" Mike Richards cardboard cutout announced.  
"Wait I wanted The Rise and Fall of Communism" Reu said.  
"Too bad!"

The first word appeared on Reu's screen, sand.

"Uh...you step on this on the beach" Reu hinted.  
"BZZT. Too obvious" Mike Richards cardboard cutout said, forcing the next word, ocean.  
"You swim in this"  
"BZZT. Too obvious" Mike Richards cardboard cutout said, forcing the next word, sailboat.  
"Well stop giving such stupid words" Reu complained.  
"Oh, uh. This...floats..." Reu hinted.  
"Titanic" Berserker guessed.  
"No. It...can be ridden"  
"Jet skis"  
"You use this to transport in Wind Waker" Reu struggled to think of a hint that wasn't obvious.  
"The King of Red Lions"  
"Which a is a..."  
"Boat"  
"What kind of boat?"  
"BZZT. Too obvious" Mike Richards cardboard cutout said.

Reu banged his head off the screen.

"And time is up!" Mike Richards cardboard cutout announced.  
"0 points across both teams. Things are heating up!"  
"Were all retarded piss off everyone" Berserker stated.  
"Hmm. What exactly is preventing us from moving on to the next room without participating in this?" StarBird asked.  
"Hm. Hm. True that" Riley said.

Reu, Berserker, Riley, and LEMON got out of their seats and joined StarBird in walking out of the room to continue through be pyramid, pressing on.

Cloud, Pantz, Lukeguy, Ziggy, and Jacob were in a room with a huge pit in front of them, separating the doors to the next rooms located on platforms to the east, west, and north of the pit. The walls were mossy and many vines stuck out from the ceiling.

"Ok ok but what I don't get is why do I have to be The Gay?" Jacob asked.  
"Because you're gay dude. Its not use denying it. Rydli's list was mediocre, but truky Luke is The Sissy, you are The Gay, and I am The Money Guy" Cloud said.  
"I'm not a sissy..." Luke mumbled.  
"What even is a money guy?" Jacob asked.  
"He's the Money Guy" Cloud said.  
"Right. But what does he do?"  
"He's the Money Guy" Cloud repeated.  
"Yes I get that, but what does he do with the money?"  
"He's the Money Guy" Cloud repeated.  
"Whoa hey meme friends, slow down lol

ses" Ziggy said.  
"So, guys. How should we cross this giant gap?" Pantz asked.  
"More like are we gonna address that huge gap in our conversation just then, am I right?" Jacob laughed as he said "am". You know when people have a short laugh as they say a word or two. Like that.  
"No. Just no, dude." Cloud sighed.  
"Let me show you guys how it's done" Jacob said confidently as he tugged on a vine to check its sturdiness.

Jacob backed up a few feet with a vine in hand. He then ran to the edge and leaped as he held onto the vine, swinging across the pit.

"Woooo!" Jacob cheered, making it across the gap and then slamming into the wall next to the exit door.  
"Nice one, Jacob" Pantz yelled out,

Pantz then took hold of a vine and repeated the action to get across, albeit not slamming into the wall like Jacob the tard.  
Ziggy looked at the abyss below the pit and started shaking nervously.

"I, uh, don't know if I can do this. Looks dangerous and stuff, bros...ehehhe..." Ziggy started twiddling his thumbs like some anime girl or something.  
"That was a quick change of mood" Cloud noted.  
"The RNG in Ziggy's mind took affect" Luke mumbled.  
"RNG?" Ziggy asked.  
"I'll show you RNG with my confidence boost" Ziggy cried, taking a vine and swinging over speedily.

Luke took a vine and swung over next, leaving Cloud as the only one on the starting platform.

"You can do it Cloud" Pantz shouted from across he gap.  
"Shut up woman I know it" Cloud yelled back.

Cloud looked over the edge nervously.

[Cloid in le confession toilet]  
"I'm not gonna fuck this up and SD like some trash casual. I'm not nervous about this..."  
[le end]

"Come on Cloud" Jacob yells over.

Cloud looked at the black pit of emptiness and gulped.  
Luke scratched his public hair until he got an idea.

"Monkey!" Luke shouted.

Suddenly, a flip set off in Cloud's mind.  
Cloud did a monkey flip and grabbed onto two vines, one with each foot, swinging over. But the vines snapped midway through and Cloud took one final leap of faith to make it over. Everyone watched Cloud about to fall with stunned expressions, but Pantz ran to the edge and held her hand out as far as she could reach in an attempt to catch him. Cloud, in slow motion, brought his right hand out reaching for Pantz. He slammed it down slowly to try to connect with hers. Their fingertips reached toward each other inches a part but alas Cloud's hand missed and he began to sink down the pit. But he stopped falling as someone caught him by grabbing his jacket. It was Luke! Luke didn't have enough strength to pull him up because of his noodle arms but Jacob, Pantz, and Ziggy quickly ran over to help pull Cloud up to safety.

"We did it fellas c:" Ziggy said.  
"Now, onwards!" Jacob said excitedly, turning around and running straight into a wall.  
"Fool." Cloud said.

As such, the five exited the room and pressed on.

Grenade, Bless, Carz, DryBones, and Joe were in a narrow room with engravings on the wall that they ignored.

"I hate minions" Carz said.  
"Haha classic Carz lol that is so Carz omg haha nailed it lol" Joe laughed.  
"Can we vote off Ziggy so I can miss him?" Bless asked.  
"Shut up Bless grounded grounded grounded" Carz said.  
"Fuck you!" Bless said.  
"Hey! Language! Come on guys, we don't need to resort to those foul words" DryBones complained.  
"You know what I think? I think Haine should drunkenly try to unzip andre's pants to reveal his prepubescent dryboner and try to suck it on all fours like a giraffe eating leaves from a tree while he is with his fagggot friends" Bless said.  
"omq" DryBones said.

[Grenade in le confession toilet]  
"I see myself as the sort of neutral member of the group. Levelheaded, down to earth, you know? The one who is just trying to focus on the task at hand and keep things going, I'm sure the rest of the team sees me as that as well"  
[le end]

[DryBones in le confession TOILET]  
"I see myself as the brains of the group. Without me, I feel they would be disorganized savages. Thankfully I am here to lay down the law and keep everything together"  
[le end]

"Alright guys so I came up with some rules to keep things focused.  
More rules!

No breaking the rules  
No usfhsdiufhusdfgaskd  
No breaking all the rules of this  
No 11-year-olds and 12-year-olds  
No Sudomemo  
No Birthdays  
No June 30th  
No 9 + 10  
No 21  
No no's.  
No 123214678312648123648716384 notifications  
No Gumball  
No Watterson  
No Fictional Story  
No Lisa Simpson  
No Simpsons  
No Family Guy  
No yes Simpsons  
No yes's.  
No T's in this puzzle  
No Fortune of Wheel  
No Wheel of Fortune  
No Jeopardy  
No being happy  
No letting スパークプラグM break these rules  
No sdafhudsgfkdagsfikagdsdygfiagfiuds again  
No Japanese  
No 10-year-olds  
No 9-year-olds  
No スパークプラグM  
No dry bones  
No Malleo  
No 10.4K  
No HI!  
No zzz  
No ROBLOX  
No Australian Wheel of Fortune  
No ausisdufkhskdagfads REALLY?  
No f##king  
No spark  
No plug  
No mature audience  
No rated M  
No no no no's  
No anti-gravity  
No everything

and

No car crashing  
No being sad or happy  
No rude" DryBones said.  
"tl;dr" Bless said.  
"Bless it was spoken dialogue, not a post" Grenade said.  
"Shut up retard"  
"Whoa whoa guys GUYS! Let's stop bickering, alright? I think I found a way out of the room!" Joe said excitedly.  
"Is it through that door?" Grenade asked.  
"No, there's a lever right next to the door, if we pull it we'll probably get a shortcut!" Joe said excitedly, pulling the lever.

In the four corners of the room some blocks were moved and water came rushing into the room. The five members looked down to see the ground quickly filling up with water. The exit door then shut firmly. Joe tried lifting it up but it wouldn't budge.

"Oh my God we are gonna die!" DryBones shrieked, running around in circles.  
"Fuck you fuck you fuck you I can't believe Grenade Joe Carz and DryBones are prematurely fucking dead" Carz said.  
"Everyone calm down" Grenade said.

Bless took his pants off and smecked Grenade with them. The water was now to their knees.

GingeraleDragon, Stickboy, J, Sam, and Isaac were walking down a hall.

"So...I was thinking the next time we jump off the plane we reenact the One Piece opening where they all fall from the sky" J said.  
"Can it with the weeb references J they're giving me cancer" Gingerale said.  
"Oh...well, anyway. Do you guys miss ToastWolf?" J asked.  
"Eh" Stickboy shrugged.  
"I don't miss anybody everyone can suck it" Sam said.  
"Sometimes I miss ToastWolf...BUT MY AIM IS GETTING BETTER!" Isaac shouted with a smile.

Gingerale lifted his glasses and pinched his eyes with a large groan.

[J in le confession toilet]  
"ToastWolf is gone, which means my throwback can and will happen. And if anyone tries to stop me I will murder them..."  
[le end]

[GingeraleDragon in le confession toilet]  
"Gotta be honest. Not really digging my treatment so far this season. Making me look sprakeh-tier if you catch my drill. Now I'm stuck with these...people...but whatever, I-"  
J barges into the bathroom.  
"Actually I think there may be some haigoo on the pla-"  
"AHHHH what are yoooooou doing here!?"  
[le end]

"This team suuuuuuucks" Gingerale complained.  
"Let's not lose our heads though" Stickboy said.  
"Haha nice one Stick. I'm really feeling that joke right there"  
"Now it's Gingerale time"  
"Haha when did Stickboy get so cool?"  
"Aw come on Stick don't be such a demagogue" J frowned.  
"Nice word did you get it from your word a day calendar?" Stickboy asked.

The five arrived at a dead end. They looked upwards to see the wall reached up to a large height.

"Rock climbing?" Stickboy asked.  
"I'd prefer windsurfing. This is rather unfavorable to my skills" Isaac admitted.  
"SHUT UP and fucking just climb" Sam shouted, already leaping rock to rock and gaining higher altitude.  
"This looks...ehh...can we go back and choose a different path?" Stickboy asked.  
"Hey Stickboy I heard one of our teammates took your Wii Fit Trainer amiibo. We better catch up to them to see if she's alright..." Gingerale said.  
"WHAT? NOT MY LOVELY WII FIT TRAINER" Stickboy panicked, quickly climbing up the wall.

Isaac walked up a few feet but then grew too tired and fell to the ground.

"Hurry up faggots!" Sam shouted from high above.

Gingerale was sweating tremendously as he continued up the wall. He then looked up and imagined a Garchomp with a huge cock waiting for him at the top. He tightened his Charizard cap and started moving faster.

Nicholas, Mr. Moogle, Alice, Mike, and Robot were climbing a stone staircase.

"So Alice. What do you think of cropped Goodra porn?" Nicholas asked.

[Alice in le confession toilet]  
"Well that's one way to start a conversation"  
[le end]

"It's fine, I guess" Alice shrugged.  
"Interesting. Interesting." Nicholas said.

[Alice in le confession toielt]  
"Goodra porn? Lame. But I'm not here to make enemies, I'm gonna try to be on good terms with everyone"  
[le end]

"So Robot, anything interesting you have to say?" Mr. Moogle asked.  
"Not really, although I could talk about how trash I am at Smash Bros" Robot suggested.  
"No, I'm good" Moogle said.

[Mr. Moogle in le confession toilet]  
"Robot can be overly negative. She could win this season and still say she is the worst competitor."  
[le end]

. /imallama/20150728132501

"Haha oh Mike, that is so something you would say. Not something about killing Jews!" Nicholas said.  
"Now why would I say that! Antisemitism has never been a Mike joke after all o3o" Mike replied.  
"Oh Mike I 卍" Nicholas said.  
"Samesies!  
" Mike replied.  
"Wait I thought the Jew jokes were kill" Mr. Moogle said confused.  
"Moogle you fool that was obviously a shitpost that doesn't count towards a person's personality and views" Nicholas said.  
"Mike! Mike!" Alice said, peeling her spaghetti banana off.  
"Guys I think we're missing something here. This stairway is so freakin long, and I'm not seeing any sign of getting near the top" Mr. Moogle noted.  
"We've stepped 6281 steps so far" Robot added.  
"Thank you for that useless bit of information" Moogle thanked.  
"Hmm..." Mike said.

Mike turned around and started a long jump but moved backwards, landing on the staircase again. He repeated the long jump while moving backward motion a few times before Mike was whisked away from the group, flying up the stairs.

"!?" Robot exclaimed.  
"Of course, the Super Mario 64 endless staircase trick" Alice said.  
"The staircase that leads to...:$ Bowser"  
"No this cannot happen...speedrun tactics helping in real life should never be a thing..." Nicholas sighed.  
"I'm all for impractical solutions" Mr. Moogle said.

Mr. Moogle, Robot, Alice, and Nocolas backwards long jumped until they were sent flying to the top, reunited with Mike.

"Hail Satan" Mike cheered.  
"I gotta say that was one HECK of a trick, Mike" Nicholas complimented.

Mike nodded, and the five entered the door in front of them and pressed on.

StarForce, Blooberri, and Sunnia walked into a room with three pillars chained to the ceiling swinging back and forth, leading up to a platform with the exit door on it.

"Hmm, like a platformer. Nice" Bloo said.  
"This looks simple...only three of us, after all. Strength in low numbers right haha" StarForce said.

Sunnia waited for the first pillar to swing by and start to lose its velocity near the right wall, as it came swinging back Sunnia leaped and landed on it, holding onto the chain for safety.

"Nice one, Sunnia!" Bloo called out.

The pillar Sunnia was on swung to near the left wall and the next one was on the opposite side, the right wall. As they both began to swing back she jumped and landed on the second. Bloo jumped on the first. StarForce watched them nervously. Bloo timed her jump and leaped into the second pillar as Sunnia made it to the third. Bloo jumped on the third. Together, they made the final jump to he safe platform and high fived.

"Alight StarForce you got this!" Blooberri shouted from across the room.  
"Just relax...what's the worst that could happen?" StarForce asked himself, taking a deep breath and taking his first jump.

StarForce missed completely and fell to the ground which was full of spikes. He cried loudly as they dug into his skin and he started bleeding a lot. StarForce got up and walked over to the platform Sunnia and Blooberi were at, sobbing as the pain continued to follow. The platform was higher than he was, so he had to jump up and be grabbed by Bloo, who pulled him up.

"That...really...was unpleasant" StarForce winced.  
"Pain is cool" Sunnia commented.  
"Alight I guess we should move on" Bloo said, facing the exit door.  
"Only one door? Not much of maze" Sunnia complained.

Suddenly, the ground rumbled and six more doors popped up from the ground, three on each side of the door they were facing.

"Oh..." StarForce said.  
"Well if the original door was here initially hen it must lead the right way" Sunnia said.

The original door then dropped below the round.

"How does that even work?" Bloo asked.  
"I guess we have to choose one of the other ones then" StarForce sighed.  
"Hold up yall I'm having a vision" Blooberri said, and the camera zoomed into her head.

The vision shows Jacob opening a jar and a fart being released.

"Well that was irrelevant" Bloo sated.

The three looked around at all the possible doors to choose. Sunnia walked over to the second door, Bloo and StarForcr follows her in.

"I got a good feeling about this" StarForce smiled.

The three then stopped walking, not because they wanted to but the were unable to. They looked down to see the floor completely covered in sand and their feet stuck to the ground, slowly pulling them down.

"AaaaaAAAAAHHHHH" StarForce shrieked.  
"Quicksand? Oh snap!" Blooberri shouted.

A laugh track played from the invisible clapping audience as the screen faded to black.

Eden, Jp, Rydli, DaUser, and Kirby walked into a actual maze room with large walls, narrow paths, and corners to turn sprawled everywhere.

"Hmm, maybe we should split up" Kirby suggested.  
"Uh, Gluvr. Once somebody finds the right path they're gonna get lost trying to regroup. Obviously, staying together is key." Rydli said.  
"Oh yeah! True fam 😂😂😂👌👌👌" Kirby said.  
"Hmm, hey user? How about you decide which direction we should start off" Rydli said.  
"Who me?" DaUser asked.  
"Is there another user here?"  
"Yes. 35 others. 36 including you."  
"Whatever just pick a direction"  
"Right."

Rydli, Kirby, DaUser, and Eden started walking down the right path but Jp grabbed Eden and kept her back a bit.

"Hey, Eden. I have a proposal" she whispered.  
"Oh? I, uh, have a boyfriend..." Eden replied.  
"What? No...I mean, like, we should stick together. In votes and stuff. I'm new to the competition and you didn't do too hot in the previous seasons so-  
"Really? You mean HDI? Does no one temper me making 11th place in HDA? That was quite a feat"  
"Yeah sure whatever. So what do you say? Wanna work together?"  
"...maybe"  
"Alright" Jp said, and the two walked faster up to catch up with the rest of the group.

Rydli snickered, having heard the entire conversation. DaUser and Kirby probably heard it too, it wasn't exactly quiet.

[Eden in le confession toilet]  
"Not sure about this alliance thing. But I got far enough in HDA with it. But that had more people...whatever, it doesn't hurt to have just one person helping you out"  
[le end]

Grenade, Bless, DryBoner, Varz, and Joe were swimming in the room as it continue to fill with water. They were now almost to the ceiling.

"This is so fun it's like a super-sized bathtub! You guys are always complaining about not having bathing options on the plane haha well look at this" Joe said, swimming backwards around he four others.  
"Looks like we're gonna die. Thanks for the memories, even though they weren't so great." Bless said.  
"Are you saying that ironically?" Grenade asked.  
"Yes."

Grenade gave Bless a high five.

"This reminds me of when Caillou died and then got grounded" Carz said.  
"I don't want to die...I'm so young...so much to do...I..." DryBones looked at his reflection in the water as his eyes started to water.  
"ok andre" Bless said.

The water rose until all five's heads were pressed up against the ceiling.  
They closed their eyes ready for death's cold embrace but were surprised by the water's shift in behavior. The water began swishing around, increasing in intensity exponentially. The water started to swirl and swish around in a circular motion so quickly there appeared to be a hole in the center of the room. It was like a whirlpool or some shit. Hey can you stop it with the snarky fourth wall comments. Shut up Dave you wanted me to write for this episode I'm doing it my way.  
The group swirled around the room until they were dragged to the bottom, a part at the edge of the pyramid popped out as water gushed out and the five spurted out and onto the sandy ground of Egypt, water flowing gently beneath them.

"And we have our first team here. Grenade, Bless, DryBones, Carz, Joe! Congratulations, you get the first camel" Admin declared.  
"Really? Awesome" Joe said.  
"Wow we didn't suck for once" Grenade said

The five got on a camel and it started walking through the desert.

"And with that, one group makes it to the checkpoint, seven to go. Three camels remain, and the challenge is heating up! What will happen next? Find out on Haiku! Drama! World Tour!" Admin announced.  
"Was that really necessary? We're not even cutting to a commercial break, you just randomly wanted to shout that?" Imboo asked.  
"It's fun, okay." Admin said, crossing his arms.

Nicholas, Mr. Moogle, Alice, Mike, and Robot were in the room Sunnia, StarForce, and Blooberri were in previously.

"Krogre" Mike stated, jumping over the spikes and landing on each swinging pillar in rapid succession until he reached the other side.

Nicholas looked down and noticed blood on the spikes.  
He took his turn and timed his jumps, making it to the other time with relative ease but taking longer than Mike.  
Mr. Moogle and Alice jumped on each pillar until they got to the other side next.  
Finally, Robot kicked in her booster jet and hovered over easily.

"Hmm, six doors to choose from..." Mr. Moogle pointed out, and the five examined the doors wondering which one to choose.

Nicholas followed the trail of blood to the room where he saw StarForce, Blooberri, and Sunnia struggling in the quicksand. He shut the door before they could see him.

"Alright Robot, can you detect which door has the best path?" Moogle asked.

Robot scanned the room and each of the doors.

"Fresh air can be found continuing from this door" Robot informed, pointing to door four.  
"Couldn't there be a false room with, like, an open roof, so the fresh air distracts us?" Alice asked.  
"No." Robot said.  
"I agree. No." Moogle said.

The group opened door four and walked down a short ball until they found the exit, which lead outside the pyramid.

"Great job, Robot" Mr. Moogle complimented, patting her on the back.  
"Seeet" Alice said.  
"Yass minty" Mike said.  
"Nicholas line" Nicholas said.

Marrowsky, Pseudonym, Elent, Shinxy, and Lek were in an ancient, dark room with drawings on the wall. Pseudonym lit a torch so they could see.

"Wow, these must be Osiris, Anubis, and Horus" Lek exclaimed, admiring the wall art.  
"Looks like a Lucario" Element tilted his head.  
"What's that weird symbol next to Anubis?" Shinxy asked.  
"That's called a fetish" Marrowsky said.  
"Wait, are you telling me an Egyptian God with a canine head that was the inspiration for Lucairo has a symbol called a fetish?" Element asked.  
"It's not that kind of fetish. It's a symbol that depicts a headless animal skin, often feline, tied by the tail to a pole. How do you like that, shinx_fucker?" Marrowsky asked.  
"I think it's boring let's not waste time here" Element rolled his eyes, stepping away from the wall and walking down the straightforward path.  
"Heh, that guy automatically assuming the canine head with a symbol called a fetish implies something nasty. Furries are so weird" Lek laughed.  
"I know right? It's cool how we embrace it though x3" Shinxy said, hugging Lek tighter.  
"Once again, I am NOT a furry. I just have a slight interest in the art, and may I remind you kimono-"  
"Hurry it up you're slowing us down" Pseudonym complained.  
"I didn't even ask to be here" Lek mumbled, crossing his arms.  
"So anyways, Pseudo. Heard you got a new GTX 970." Element said.  
"Oh yeah. That's right" Pseudonym smiled.  
"And a 970A-D3P motherboard?"  
"Ultra. Durable."  
"unf"

The five saw a light that grew brighter the more they walked down the room, until they reached the end and edited the pyramid.

"Whoa hey look! Camels!" Shinxy said.  
"Nice." Marrowsky added.

At the top of the pyramid, Luke, Clpud, Pantz, Ziggy, and Jacob stuck their heads out.

"We made it out? Hurray!" Pantz threw her hands in the air.

Cloud blocked the beating sun by shading his eyes peering down below the feet of the pyramid, where he saw Element and company getting on a camel and leaving.

"There's one camel left, we gotta get to it" Cloud said.  
"Leave it to me" Jacob said confidently, rolling his sleeves up.

Jacob took one step out and then tripped and fell down the entire pyramid, whacking himself off each block.

"Ebin" Ziggy exclaimed.

Luke, Cloud, Pantz, and Ziggy hopped down as fast as they could, trying to catch up to Jacob.  
Then, Gingerale, Stickboy, J, Isaac, and Sam popped out about halfway down the pyramid. They noticed Jacob falling and ran down racing him to the bottom.  
Jacob fell to the sandy ground first but GingeraleDragon and the rest of the group stepped all over him and ran past him to leap on the fourth and final camel and took off.

"WOOO! That's what I'm TALKING about" Sam cheered.  
"Not bad" Gingerale admitted.  
"Anyone else feel the desire to make a hump joke?" Isaac asked.  
"No." Stickboy answered.

Pantz, Cloud, Luke, and Ziggy took their final hops and made it to the bottom of the pyramid.

"Aw, man. Oh well" Pantz said.  
"Uggggh" Jacob groaned.  
"Hey a jar" Cloud pointed out, as there was a jar on the ground.

Jacob picked the jar up as he stood up, trying to hide his wincing from the pain.

"Wonder what's in this jar that has nothing in it" Jacob wondered, opening the lid, causing the stinky fart to release and spread around everyone's noses making everyone erupt in coughs.

"Aahhhhhhhh..." Jacob fell down.  
"Really Madorky?" Cloud coughed.  
"You recognize the fart's source?" Pantz asked with a cough.  
"Of course, dude. We are homies after all" Cloud said.  
"So she farted in your mouth before?"  
"What? No! Sometimes someone just wafts and you take it in. Get used it, get molded by it, start to distinguish them from each other. Is part of warioland" Cloud explained.

"And with that, five teams make it out of the pyramid. Three left to come out. The race to the Nile River is on!" Admin declares

Lemon, Berserker, StarBird, Reu, and Riley were in the room the furries were in before.

"These walls look neat" Lemon noted.  
"Well well well" a voice called out.

It was Rydli! He, DaUser, Kirby, Eden, and Jp walked up.

"So we meet again Lemon" Rydl greeted.  
"I don't recall a previous encounter" Lemon said.  
"And so here our discussion must end. I hope to see you again, in the future" Rydli said, walking toward the exit with the ladies.  
"We all stay on the same plane I don't see us not meeting again" Lemon said.  
"Come on Lem, we better speed up. Like Sonic. The hedgehog. Who is fast. I like Sonic." Riley said.  
"Wryyyyyy" Reu shouted.

Both groups exited the pyramid.

"Aw, all the camels are gone?" Jp asked disappointingly.  
"No problem, I prefer the long run. Better exercise for my calfs" Rydli said as he did some leg stretches, then broke out into a sprint. The rest of the group followed behind.  
"It's so...hot out here..." Riley panted.  
"Maybe you should take off your YouTube jacket" Reh suggested.  
"No way dude, this thing is a GenesisFrenzy staple. I'm not taking this off" Riley said.  
"Alright fellas. Let's start moving" Lemon said, and the five took off as well in the race to the Nile.

Blooberri, StarForce, and Sunnia were the remaining contestants not to leave the pyramid yet.

Ding!

"Aw man, I was hoping he'd forget about the song" Element complained.  
"I thought you liked the songs because they have you an opportunity to disqualify yourself." Pseudonym said.  
"No way dude, I'm not fucking around anymore. I'm playing to win, so I'm all for singing" Element said.  
"And hey, the 'ol montage boost will get us through the desert faster" Marrowsky said.

"I wonder what kind of tune it will be this time" Isaac wondered.  
"Hmm, perhaps an Aladdin vibe?" J asked.

[Song 4 - To the Nile Rap]  
(In a quick pace)  
YO!  
ya-yo, ya-yo

Jp: Here's how the story starts out  
Kirby: We find 40 haikuers competing without a doubt  
Rydli: We evaluate the team, to determine which ones stink  
Eden: Then one gets voted out, goodbye the weakest link  
DaUser: ya-yo, yo-yo

Ziggy: Sicker than your average nigger killer  
Twist nigger's heads off  
Niggers fucking stink niggers and gayers  
Chicken wing eating players  
Triple K hooligans like Moon Man  
Dead right if they head right  
Fucking your mom every night  
Moon man's been smooth since days of killing jews  
Never lose  
Never choose to lynch jews who do  
something to us  
Luke and Jacob: ya-yo, ya-yo, ya-yo, ho-ho  
Pantz and Cloud: To the niiiiile

Element: His name's Ziggy, he's a trashy fucking weeb  
and over here we got DryBones, the former picked-on dweeb  
Lukeguy reviews stuff, while Cloud rps ironically  
Pseudo's irrelevant, Bless shitposts irrationally  
Pseudonym: I don't like that description of me  
Shinxy: I'm a cute lil Shinx, all the ladies like Rydli,  
DaUser posts filler, and don't forget murr-owsky 3  
Marrowsky: Kirby's a gizmo lover, Jp likes Jp  
Eden did something with haikustuck I guess  
Who the hell is Jacob? Joe's love life is a mess  
Carz is a card, the shitpost king, Pantz is chill while Elly likes to sing  
And then there's Grenade, ...I can't think of anything  
Pseudonym: ya-yo, ya-yo

Bless: Birches and hoes, overwhelmed with all their woes  
Yeah my dick pays rent, and I'm here to represent  
On our way to the notorious and glorious, the feh the will be victorious. Less than a mile, won't be awhile, it's the opposite of vile.  
Grenade: We continue on our way  
Carz: BLESS IS FUCKING GAY  
Joe: ya-yo, ya-yo, ya-yo, ho-ho  
DryBones: to the niiiiile

Alice: Wonderin why Nicholas had chosen me, this question is overhwhelmin me  
Nicholas: Just being nice, like our hero Kurtis the Snivy  
Mike: Final Fantasy bat: kee  
Mr. Moogle: Our destination's coming up, who will win we will soon see  
Robot: ya-yo, ya-yo

StarForce: This is it, I think we're gonna die  
Blooberri: Come on man, we at least gotta try  
Sunnia: How do we know to sing, I

Lemon: R-E-U, SirCrackers is my man  
Berk don't foll, Riley's got the plan  
StarBird's such a mysterious one  
My rapping skills match no one  
Reu: Nicholas...rickalos, who's up for kinky vore?  
Say no more, Mike's speedrunning galore  
Alice the animal, party it up some more  
Mr. Moogle's the brains, Robot has a R.O.B. she can adore  
Gingerale likes Xenoblade, pokeporn and Metal Gear  
Stickboy wins the amiibo collector of the year  
Isaac is pretty random, and Sam likes to win  
And don't forget J, he's a fan of Shin  
Berserker: Bloo's a nice girl, StarForce isn't a girl, and Sunnia is a girl  
Riley and StarBird: ya-yo, ya-yo, ya-yo, ho-ho

GingeraleDragon: Hurry this up, someone get me a Lapras to fuck  
Isaac: We're in Egypt man, you're shit out of luck  
Sam: Keep keep going, we're gonna fucking win!  
Stickboy: Really, already? My nap will have to fin  
J: Yo, yo, yo, fo shizzle my nizzle lizzle, gonna jizzle on this nizzle...

All: to the niiiiile  
Birches and hoes

GingeraleDragon, Stickboy, Isaac, J, and Sam were the first to arrive at the Nile. They stopped the camel and hopped off.

"Awesome" J said in glee.  
"So what's the final challenge?" Gingerale asked.  
"Nope, as I recall, the entire team has to be here before I inform you" Admin reminded.  
"But there is a river here, feel free to wash up if that would please you. It's been awhile since some of you have bathed, after all" Admin said.

Some of them smelled their pits.

Element, Marrowsky, Shinxy, Pseudonym, and Lek arrived next.

"WOOO!" Shinxy cheered, hugging Lek.  
"Again, did I really have to stick around for the challenge?" Lek asked.  
"No, nobody made you. You didn't have to follow Shinxy." Admin said.  
"As, you did it for me 3" Shinxy murred.  
"You did good guys" Marrowsky complimented.

Grenade, DryBones, Bless, Carz, and Joe arrived third.

"What took so long guys? Weren't you the first to depart?" Admin asked.  
"We had to keep stopping to pee" Grenade said.  
"Pee and sweat are like cousins" Joe said.  
"I miss Ziggy..." Bless said.

Next was Ziggy, Cloud, Luke, Jacob, and Ontaz.

"So..much...walking..." Jacob panted, falling to be ground.  
"We're here brogres" Cloud said.  
"ses" Ziggy noted.

Lemon, Riley, Reu, Berserker, and StarBird ran up next.

"Yah" Lemkn said.  
"Oh my Sonic 3 my legs hurt after that" Riley said.

Nicholas, Mr. Moogle, Mike, Alive, and Robot were the next to appear. After getting off, the camel sat on Jacob and closed its eyes.

"Wait, what? How did someone on a camel take longer than two teams on foot?" Lemon asked..  
"Our camel looks like it's about to die" Mr. Moogle said.  
"Oh yeah haha one of the camels may be 40 years older than the others" Admin laughed.

Rydli, DaUser, Kirby, Eden, and Jp arrived next.

"And with that-  
"Hey, don't we get to say something first? You're just gonna move on without us eg tying any lines?" Jp asked.  
"Making us look a little...dry!" Eden said.  
"Oooooooh" Kirby said, giving Eden a high five.  
"Fascinating. Anyways, all of the Troll Slaiyers are here, so they can begin the final challenge. Team Jacob, until StarForce, Blooberri, and Sunnia get here, you can't do anything" Admin ordered.  
"So we're just gonna sit here and watch them compete while we can do nothing?" Reu asked.  
"Yeah pretty much. Anyways, we got a second guest start for this episode. And he is none other than...Luna's stepdad!" Admin announced.  
"Hi I'm Luna, stepfather" Luna's stepdad greeted.  
"Uh, why?" Pseudonym asked.  
"Well he was in the country and we thought 'whoa hey he's there while we're here let's do a thing'" Admin explained.  
"That's kinda weird, now I'm disappointed Luna didn't even make it here" J sighed.  
"But Jonah, she has a job and responsibilities" Luna reminded him.  
"Oh yeah, true true" J said.  
"Alright guy, take it away and explain the challenge" Admin said.  
"Alright, so, kids like scarabs right? You kids like scarabs? Well here is a jar of scarabs. Get them across the river to win. Have fun everybody" Luna's stepdad said.

Troll Slaiyers huddled.

"Alright guys, ideas?" Rydli asked.  
"Move the jar from this side of the river, to the other" Grenade said.  
"Hey retard it isn't gonna be so easy hey!" Cloud said.  
"Maybe we can just swim across?" Jp suggested.

They looked over to see crocodiles swimming in the river.

"Throw it over?" Pantz suggested.  
"Also, you need at least one person to cross the river with the jar" Lube's stepdad added.

"Hey, Sunnia, Blooberri, and Starwhatever never made it out of the pyramid, shouldn't we be concerned?" Gingerale asked.  
"Hmm. Maybe. Parascout, Faline. Go find them." Admin ordered with the snap of a finger.  
"Alright, fine. Maybe you'll reward me with a spot on the show, eh? Eh?" Parascout said.  
"Just find them" Admin ordered.

Back at me pyramid, the three were sinking. Now down to their heads. They're gonna die!

"This is it, we're gonna die" StarForce cried.  
"Death...I welcome you..." Sunnia said.

They closed their eyes but were surprised to notice they stopped sinking.

"Wow, I guess the room wasn't high enough" Blooberri said.  
"Hurray, starvation instead!" StarForce cheered, trying to move his arms but they are stuck in the sand.

Parascout and Faline walked in.

"Whoa... Parascout exclaimed.  
"YAY" StarForce shouted in glee.  
"How did you find us?" Blooberri asked.  
"Uh...guessing. Yeah, luck. We don't have trackers in you guys" Parascout said.  
"Great" StarForce exclaimed.  
"So, how are we gonna get out?" Blooberri asked.

Faline took her scarf off her neck and threw it to the sand, where Bloo grabbed on and was pulled up by the interns. They repeated the same for Sunnia and StarForce.

"Well that settles that" Parascout said, dusting off his hands.  
"Hey what is this?" Bloo asked, picking up a scroll.

She opened it up and everyone gathered around as she read the top of it.

"Oh my goodness!" StarForce gasped.  
"It's the Declaration of Independence!" Blooberri exclaimed.  
"What is that? Is that an American thing? I'm Canadian daily episode reminder" Parascout said.

A huge triangle then popped on the wall and an eye in the center of it opened open. The three sides glowed brightly as words appeared below it  
"إدراج عبارة بارد بيضة عيد الفصح هنا" it read.  
"Really? That's not even Egyptian" Bloo said.  
"Well the obligatory illuminati joke is done, we should head back" Parascout said.

They were all then ejected from the pyramid as it exploded.

Back at the river, Isaac stepped out of it to dry off.

"Ah, that was a good bathing session." Isaac exclaimed.

He was then alarmed by a giant pizza-like creature that brushed up against him.

"Heeeeey, wanna have sex" the pizza monster asked, grabbing Isaac and pushing him to the ground.  
"Am ugh, what arebyo7" Isaac asked.  
"You can call me pizza the hutt..." Pizza the hutt said, taking his pizza dick out ready to get it on.

But then a beam shot him and he inflated until he blew up and his dough flesh flew everywhere and sauce blood splatted on Isaac, Stickboy, and the sand.

"Mm, fresh pepperoni!" Reu exclaimed form the background.  
"What the hell was that?" Isaac asked.  
"Pizza the hutt, weren't you listening? It seems a human and a pizza were fused somehow, they must have got splatted or squashed together to mix, don't know how that could happen though" Sitckboy explained, blowing the smoke off his laser gun.  
"Also on a side note, were you just bathing in crocodile-infested waters?"  
"It's good for the skin" Isaac defended.

"That's it! Cloud exclaimed.  
"Kirby, use your skills learned at Papa John's to build a boat out of pizza boxes" Cloud ordered.  
"Haha, you really think they teach us how to craft things by folding pizza boxes at Papa John's?" Kirby laughed.

Cloud raised a brow.

"...ok I'll do it" Kirby said, taking pizza boxes out of nowhere to craft a boat.  
"Nice idea Cloud. Ideas like that are what earn you the title of the Money Guy" Rydli stated.  
"How? What does the Money Guy even do?" Riley asked.  
"He's the Money Guy" Cloud said.  
"Ok but what is his role?" Riley asked.  
"He's the Money Guy" Cloud repeated

Kirby finished the boat made out of pizza boxes.

"Nice one Kirby. Well only one of us have to make it over, so we shouldn't overload it. Just three of us sounds good. I'll be one" Marrowksy said, taking the jar full of scarabs and getting on the boat.  
"Count me in." Element said.  
"I'm in!" DryBones said happily.

The Troll Slaiyers pushed the boat in the river so it started moving.  
Some crocodiles snapped at them, but Element punched them in the eye.

Blooberri, Sunnia, and StarForce fell from the sky, along with Faline and Parascout, landing in the sand.

"Aaaaand Team Jacob can start" Admin announced.  
"We don't have enough time to build anything" Mr. Moogle said.  
"Mike. Sick em" Nicholas ordered, and Mike ran over and leaped onto the Troll Slaiyers boat.

Mike leaped on Element, knocking him on all fours on the boat floor. Mike held Element's hands down with his own, and tangled their feet together to prevent movement. Mike held his head on Element's fedora for a moment before making his way down Element's back until he got to his butthole. Mike stuck his long extended tongue out and stuck it right into Element's asscrack. Element winced at first and squirmed about effortlessly, but Mike held a tight grip with his tongue, moving it farther up inside Element through his intestines. Element started panting heavily, closing his eyes and raising his ass upwards. Mike's tongue kicked around inside Element moving more up. Element felt his tummy tickle as Mike maneuvered through it. Element started panting very hard as the tongue went up Element's esophagus. Element grunted, trying to scream but his voice was blocked by Mike's tongue, now at the root of Elly's mouth. Their tongues wrestled.  
Marrowksy's jaw dropped as he watched on. Distracted by this, a crocodile jumped on the boat and knocked Marrowksy out.  
DryBones was huddled in a corner, trying to avoid the scene. He rocked back and forth in cowardice. Then as he watched his teammates, he stopped rocking, and stood up on both feet.

"TIME TO BREAK MY RULES IN 3...2...1...GO!  
I'm breaking the rules right now.  
Usfhsdiufhusdfgaskd!  
That is what I'm doing right now.  
Some dude who breaks all my rules is 11 and turns 12 this year.  
I use Sudomemo.  
Everyone has Birthdays.  
My Birthday is on June 30th.  
What's 9 + 10?  
TWENNI WAN? You stupid!  
No.  
You have 123,214,678,312,648,123,648,716,384 new notifications.  
I'm chewing gum right now, but I didn't get gum from a gumball machine.  
WATTERSON  
And you died. The end.  
Lisa Simpsons. Here it is.

The Simpsons.

Not posting a Family Guy photo in here because Family Guy sucks huge d##ks!  
Yes The Simpsons  
YES!  
I T * H A S * T O * B E * Y O U (there are two T's in the puzzle)  
FORTUNE! OF! WHEEL!

\- I'll take Game Shows for $600.  
\- Buy a vowel, spin the wheel, solve the puzzle.  
* contestant rings*  
\- Player2  
\- What is Wheel of Fortune?  
\- Correct. That takes you up to $1,200.

:D  
I'm not going to.  
Sdafhudsgfkdagsfikagdsdygfiagfiuds!  
This is Japanese: スパークプラグM  
I have a friend who is 10. He turned 10 last month.  
In 2010, I was 9.  
スパークプラグM  
Here it is."

DryBones grabbed the crocodile that punched Marrowsky and threw it at Mike, whose tongue quickly retracted out of Element.

"Oh sh*t, we need a backup plan" Nicholas said, picking up their jar of scarabs.  
"Hopefully Mike can catch this..." Nicholas said, handing it to Robot who shot the jar as far as she could.

"Oh no! Quick, is anyone here a tennis player?" Rydli asked.  
"I am" Lek said.  
"Really there's more to you than being a furry?"  
"Well actually I'm not a furry, don't like the fandom, just like some of the art and-"  
"NO TIME FOR THAT throw me up!" Rydli ordered.

Rydli jumped in Lek's hands, who threw him in the sky as high as he could.  
Rydli readied his tennis arm, bringing it up.  
Team Jacob's jar of scarabs came flying up, and Rydli slammed the jar back to them, where it crashed off Stickboy's head, releasing them to scatter around the team.

The Troll Slaiyers boat was starting to sink, Element and Marrowsky slipped into the water but DryBones took their jar of scarabs and leaped over to the sand, winning his team the challenge.

"The Troll Slaiyers win AGAIN!" Admin declared.  
"Wooo!" Troll Slaiyers cheered.  
"Three times in a row..." Isaac sighed.  
"No. No...NO. NOOO!" GingeraleDragon screamed, beating his hands off the sand as the scarabs enveloped around him and the rest of the team.

Shinxy ran over to the water to pull ELEMENT or to dry land.

"Element! Elly? Are you ok?" Shinxy asked, holding him tight.  
"Yeah, I'm fine.." Element coughed, shivering from the water. And...the thing the thing that happened.  
"Yay! 3" Shinxy said, hugging him tightly.  
"Haha, Shainxy, you know I'm not gay..." Element laughed, closing his eyes and embracing the embrace. The hug made him feel warm both inside and out.  
"I'm fine too, thanks" Marrowsky said, stepping out of the river.

Element was eating hot dogs at a table when Cloud walked over and gave him a wedgie.

"How many times are you gonna do that?" Element asked with his cumstained underpantz ogre his head

Element got up and punched Cloud in the face, knocking him to the ground.

"Fight me in Melee like a real man" Cloud sniffled, running away burying his head into his hands.

Meanwhile, Team Jacob was sitting around in the elimination room awaiting Admin.

"I guess you could say the pizza was aggressive, eh?" Alice asked, bumping her elbow on Riley.  
"Why the delay in that joke. Why not say that when the event actually happened?" Mr. Moogle asked.  
"Shut up no one said it I had to get it in there somewhere" Alice defended.

Admin stepped to the podium with passports in hand, straightening them out and preparing the announcement.

"The votes are in. One of you are about to leave and plummet down to the sands of Egypt, never to return to Haiku Drama World Tour...ever again..." Admin declared quietly and seriously.

Everyone looked around.  
StarForce was shaking. Gingerale folded his arms. Reu kept a straight face.

[Isaac in le confession toilet]  
"For messing up the challenge"  
Isaac stamps the passport.  
[le end]

[Riley in le confession toilet]  
"For having a dick or for being a dick, who knows at this point"  
Riley stamps the passport.  
[le end]

[Alice in le confession toilet]  
"For being irrelevant"  
Alice stamps the passport.  
[le end]

[Berserker in le confession toilet]  
"For being a Farquaad"  
Berserker stamps the passport.  
[le end]

Most of the team already had cans in their hand as Admin read the results to them.

"One vote for Riley"  
Riley gasped.  
"One vote for Gingerale"  
GingeraleDragon unfolded his arms and then folded them again.  
"One vote for Sunnia"  
Sunnia does nothing.  
"One vote for StarBird"  
StarBird watched on with a blank expression.  
"Two votes for StarBird"  
"Two votes for Gingerale"  
"Everyone else, is safe. And the final Mountain Dew goes to..."

StarBird didn't blink, Gingerale narrowed his eyes.  
The music got more dramatic.  
Admin held the final Mountain Dew in his hand.  
The camera zoomed in to StarBird and Gingerale's faces unnecessarily.

"...xXxLaprasFucker420xXx aka GingeraleDragon, is safe!" Admin said, tossing the can to him.

StarBird watched the can fly pass him.

"Oh well" StarBird shrugged, getting up and walking towards the exit.  
"What? StarBird? But why? There's so much I wanted to get to know about you. We could have been friends..." Lemon said sadly as he walked with him.  
"Eh, he was boring" Stickboy said.  
"It's fine, the others have more to offer than me." StarBird said, strapping his parachute on.  
"You're not even sad to go?" Lemon asked.  
"It was...fun. You know, I've been on Haiku a long time. But do I really know anyone?" StatBird asked.

With that, StarBird leaped out of the plane and activated his parachute, falling below. Lemon watched with disappointment.

"Noice, gotta admit, seeing someone fall off the plane is pretty cool" Lek said as he leaned against the wall next to the door.  
"Yeah, spending of which, your time here is up." Admin said, shoving a parachute in Le: hand and knocking him out of the plane.  
"Wait, what? B-but I didn't get an autograph from Genesis!" Lek screamed as he plummeted down.

As he fell past StarBird, StarBird looked up as the plane flew away from him, and sighed.

"Real talk, we need to stop losing" Isaac said.  
"Real talk, don't say real talk" Gingerale said.  
"It is true though, I mean if this keeps happening we might get voted off before BLESS. The last thing I want is for Bless to outrank me" Alice said.  
"Fu*k Bless" Nicholas agreed.  
"You hate Bless too?" Alice asked.  
"Bless is worthless!" Nicholas said.

Alice smiled as cheesy guitar strums played in the background.

Cloud was sitting in a chair chair writing troll fics when Pantz walked up to him.

"Hey, Cloud" Pantz greeted.  
"Oh, hey" Cloud said back.  
"I wanted to make you something, so I made this" Pantz said, handing him a cylinder bracelet, it was yellow with a light blue strip in the center.  
"Really? Well, thanks dude" Cloud said.  
"No problem bro" Pantz smiled, walking back to her seat to do artsy shit.

J was laying around in the storage section of the plane.  
The door opened and Marrowsky stepped in, making J smile.

"Hey senpai" J greeted.  
"Hey kohai" Marrowsky greeted back, closing the door and tossing J a snickers bar and sitting down on a box.

[J in le confession toilet]  
"Me and Marrowsky have a thing where I call him senpai and he calls me kohai, it's cute"  
[le end]

"Alright, you want to do this?" J asked with a smile.  
"No, not really" Marrowsky admitted.  
"No one's watching besides everyone, come on I need a second person to make it more dramatic" J pleaded.  
"Alright, start it off" Marrowsky sighed.

"Prepare for trouble!" J said dramatically as he stood up.  
"Make it double!" Marrowsky added as he stood up.  
"To protect the world with devastation!" J walked across the room.  
"To unite all people within our nation!" did the same but in the opposite direction.  
"To denounce the evil of truth and love!" J said, turning around sharply.  
"To extend our reach to the stars above!" Marrowsky said, putting a rose on his mouth.  
"Jessie!"  
"James!"  
"Team Rocket blast off at the speed of light!" J did a dramatic pose.  
"Surrender now or prepare to fight!" Marrowsky threw the rose as he did his pose.

"Meowth. That's right!" Nicholas whispered to himself as he watched from behind some boxes

End of Day 20  
Initiation at 10.52%  
23-8-5-14 / 20-8-5 / 4-21-13-2 / 2-5-3-15-13-5 / 19-13-1-18-20 / 1-14-4 / 20-8-5 / 23-9-19-5 / 2-5-3-15-13-5 / 13-5-14-4 / 20-8-5 / 14-9-7-8-20-19 / 23-9-12-12 / 6-1-12-12 / 19-8-15-18-20 / 1-14-4 / 19-15-15-14 / 8-1-9-11-21 / 23-9-12-12 / 5-14-4


	5. KONO RIO DA

Chapter 5: KONO RIO DA

The haikuers were on the plane.  
In the loser class, the area for the losers to reside, Team Jacob members were sitting or laying down on the benches, for they were the team that lost, explaining why they would be in the loser class.

"On the bright side of losing so much, I have more space to roam my body around" Isaac said.  
"Which means more space for you to keep your breath out of my face" Stickboy noted, waving the stench away.  
"Hey there buddy no need to be hasty" StarForce said.  
"Oh yeah, StarForce. Somebody screwed up real badly in the last challenge." Robot said.  
"Oh really? Who?" StarForce asked.  
"Talkin' bout YOU, punk!" Sam said, pressing his finger against StarForce's chest.  
"I got this, Sam" Robot said.  
"What? Me? Why I reckon it wasn't my fault, I just made a wrong turn..." StarForce said.  
"We made a wrong turn" Blooberri reminded them.  
"Aw come on Robot, it was an honest mistake. And StarForce is such a nice guy" Mr. Moogle defended.  
"I suppose I'm just being overly negative, I suppose. As usual." Robot shrugged.  
"Oh...kupo..." Mr. Moogle said quietly.  
"Maybe some Smash would cheer make you feel better! You're such a good player!" Mike said, holding his 3DS with Super Smash Brothers for Nintendo 3DS in it.  
"Fuck Smash" Nicholas stated.  
"Cloud would if it was Melee" Reu said from the other side of the room.  
"No thanks, I'm such trash at that haha. In my ROBsquad I'm the worst..." Robot said.  
"Speaking of R.O.B., guess who preordered the retro amiibo three pack? This guy" Stickboy said proudly, pointing to himself.  
"No one cares" Gingerale said, licking his Charizard amiibo.  
"Sorry I'll let the main characters continue to speak" Stickboy replied.  
"Thanks" Isaac thanked.

Stickboy got up and walked towards the bathroom. As he opened the door Jp was walking out.

"Oh, sorry" Stickboy apologized.  
"Oh it's fine. By the way, the toilet is weird, you might want to hold off until we land..." Jp warned.  
"Oh, sure. Thanks Jp" he said, and she smiled and walked away.

Lemon sighed.

"What's the matter Lemon?" Nicholas asked.  
"Well-"  
"Just kidding I don't care"

Lemon sighed.

"Kind of funny how bad luck Lemon is. Tries to make friends, they get voted off. He has the potential to be a bad luck Brian meme! Watch out guys, if Lemon tries to befriend you you'll get kicked off next!" Alice said.  
"That's not a thing it only happened once, you can't call something a thing because it happened one time. That's like calling something that isn't reproduced a meme." Lemon said.  
"Yo, Lem. What do you think of my pink fedora?" Riley asked as he was taking a selfie.  
"It's as neat as ever" Lemon complimented.  
"Wanna know what I think? I think somebody needs to call the FASSHION police" Alice shouted.  
"Oh snap!" Lemon said.

Riley farted.

Meanwhile, Eden was walking around in first class wearing a #11 shirt.

"Hey, sup" she greeted to DaYser  
"Oh." DaYser responded.  
"You're probably wondering what's up with the shirt, eh?" Eden asked.  
"Uh." DaUser admitted.  
"It's how far I made it in HDA. Great, huh? Yeah, I know. Yeah."

Kirby and Ziggy were sitting on the couch watching anime on Netflix. DryBones sat next to them.

""DORA THE EXPLORER" was a puzzle solution on Wheel of Fortune and now people are hating 2015 for this.  
Seriously, guys? It's just a freakin' puzzle! Grow up!" he told them.

"Whoa wait DryBones is still alive? Topweird" Ziggy said.  
"Aw DryBones is so cute" Kirby smiled.  
"Is this a Japanese cartoon? Did you know in Japan, a place I long to visit, Japanese animation is known as "anime"." he explained to them.  
"Hehe no I didn't know that..." Ziggy said, looking both ways and twiddling his thumbs, hugging his waifu pillow.  
"fuck" Carz said.

Cloud was playing Super Smash Brothers for Wii U on a Wii U gamepad.

[Cloud in le confession toilet]  
"Element caught me by surprise the other night. If I wasn't work out from all that badass work I was doing during the challenge, I would have spotdodged his jab then dthrow to uair. Been some time since I played Smash, this should get me back on my A game. Wish I had MELEE here though, but I'll have to settle for this smash, ugh"  
Cloud's buttocks are then splatted with water and his feces are sucked out by a vacuum.  
"What the fuck"  
[le end]

"What the heck, you're playing Smash? Now?" Rydli asked  
"Element caught me by surprise the other night. If I wasn't work out from all that badass work I was doing during the challenge, I would have spotdodged his jab then dthrow to uair. Been some time since I played Smash, this should get me back on my A game. Wish I had MELEE here though, but I'll have to settle for this smash, ugh. But once I get enough training, Element is gonna get SHREKT" Cloud explained.  
"Cloud I'm sitting right here I can hear you" Element said, laying down in a seat near them.  
"Bitch does it look like I care?" Cloud asked.

[Cloud in le confession toilet]  
"Gotta admit, pretty cool to be able to play the gamepad anywhere as long as you have an outlet to plug your Wii U into. I wanted to play on the TV, but it's built into the wall and the only thing we're allowed to watch is...Netfliz..."  
Cloud's buttocks are splatted with water and a vacuum sticks itself in his ass.  
"Seriously what the fuck is this I didn't even have to go this time"  
[le end]

Marrowsky looked out the window and saw thousands of buildings surrounding a beach.

"Brazil? Neat." Marrowsky said, snapping some pics.

Someone outside was riding a motored hang glider through the skies. He got too close to the plane and got sucked into the turbine.

"Loving this place so far!" Joe said in glee.

The 36 flight attendants were gathered in the loser class waiting for the door to open.

"Watch your step, pipsqueak" Sam shouted, pushing pseudonym away from him.  
"Pipsqueak? I'm the oldest one here" Pseudonym said.  
"This is my domain, don't mess with my territory" Sam warned.  
"The loser class is your territory. I am okay with that" Pseudonym said.  
"What? No. Fuck you, I'm NEVER losing again!" Sam growled, pulling Pseudonym closer to him.  
"Get used to this territory, it will be yours BITCH"

Admin walked in wearing a shirt with the Brazilian flag on it.

"Creative dressing, really captures the attire of the country" Pseudonym complimented sarcastically.  
"Wow burn that hurt so much. Now before we start today's challenge I'd like to establish a ban on toilet paper" Admin announced.  
"Um. What?" Kirby asked.  
"Moving on, welcome to the second largest city of Brazil, Rio de Janeiro!" Admin announced, opening the door.

Everyone walked down the airstairs and gazed around. They could see the beautiful ocean and long white beach. Behind the beach were thousands of buildings along with some forest parts, mountain tops way back, and a statue of Christ watching over the entire city.  
Marrowsky snapped some photos.  
. .html  
"I saw this before, this is the place with the birds right" Isaac exclaimed.  
"I believe you mean Dragon Roost Island" Eden said.  
"Zelda..." Luke whispered.  
"Nice joke, huh? Cool reference? That's the sort of stuff you hear from a #11" Eden said.  
"The first challenge today will take place on the Christ the Redeemer. Everyone pair up with a teammate and make your way there. Once there, you and your buddy will face the next challenge, and everybody's results will affect the entire team in the following event." Admin explained.  
"Will we have a map of some sort that can help us find this Christ the Redeemer thing?" Kirby asked.

Admin shifted his eye to the giant statue overlooking the city.

"Uh..." he started.  
"Obviously not. Because we have our own phones, we can use google maps!" Joe exclaimed.  
"Ooooh, smart!" Kirby smiled.  
"Pfft, I'm like the only one who favours Bing" Riley rolled his eyes.

"J, team up with me" Nicholas said.  
"K. Are we on the same team though?" J asked.

Blooberri and Sunnia high fived.

"Did Mike did Berk haha!" Mike laughed.  
"Yes." Berserker replied.

"Hmm..." Reu pondered, looking around for someone to team with.  
"Hey, Ryu. Team with me" Stickboy ordered.  
"It's Reu" Reu said.  
"Are they not pronounced the same way?" Stickboy asked.  
"Fine partners we are" Reu said.

"Yo Moog. Partners?" Gingerale asked.  
"Is Twilight Sparkle best pony?" Mr. Moogle asked back.

"Hey Sam, wanna be partners?" Robot asked.  
"No way bitch" Sam responded.  
"What? Why not?" she asked.  
"Sorry nobody was declining an offer so I wanted to be the first to. Yeah sure lets do it. Oh I went two sentences without saying something aggressive. AKAKAIAKAJAJAAJ LET'S DO IIIIIIIIIT" Sam screamed

[Robot in le confession toilet]  
"Teaming up with Sam is a tactical decision. With his brute strength and my intellect we can do a lot. Imagine the strength and energy of a Rotom powering a robot lady such as I. Now that is strong.  
Did you see what I did there? Because Sam likes Rotom. Knowing that enhances the simile"  
[le end]

"?srentrap eb ot ekil uoy dluoW .ecroFratS ,yeH" Isaac asked.  
"Uh, sure" StarForce said.

Isaac held StarForce's hand.

"Until we complete the challenge, we are hereby buddies" Isaac stars.

StarForce looked at their firmly grasped hands and his pupils grew bigger.

[StarForce in le confession toilet]  
"After what happened last time, I'm not messing up. No siree!  
[le end]

"So, Alice. Guess that leaves you and me" Riley said.  
"And Lemon" Alice reminded him, walking next to Lemon.  
"Wait, what? I have to go it alone?" Riley asked.  
"No, no, it's fine. You two should work together, I wouldn't want to penalize you if we were to lose anyways." Lemon insisted.  
"Alright, fine. Each team can have one group of three" Admin declared.  
"Yes! More Riley and Lemon action!" Riley cheered.

"Bless?" Grenade asked.  
"Sure" Bless said.

"Hey Kirby. Wanna team?" Jacob asked.  
"Oh. Um, sorry to ask, but who are you?" Kirby asked.  
"Jacob. We've been in the same chat room for months..." Jacob said.  
"Oh sorry! Sure I'd love to team with you!" Kirby smiled.  
"Just as oblivious as Oscar" Luke muttered.  
"Well to be fair Jacob doesn't use his name as his username. It'd be like calling Lukeguy Luke the entire time. Ok wait bad example..." Kirby said.

"Alright Eden. Should we partner up?" Jp asked.  
"Did you know we are the 11th pairing? I thought that was interesting" Eden informed her.

Shinxy was purring as he brushed his back up against Element's crotch. Element sighed. Marrowsky was watching them.

"Hey, Shinxy. Would you like to partner with me for the challenge?" Marrowsky asked.  
"Oh, Marrowsky 3" Shinxy replied, walking over and hugging him.

Element smiled at Marrowsky.

"So many choices for my buddy. Well everyone's such a nice fella I wouldn't mind having anybody B)" Ziggy said.  
"Greetings Ziggy, team?" Rydli asked.  
"No." Ziggy said back.  
"Why not?" Rydli asked with a frown.  
"Because  
" Ziggy said.  
"Too bad for you, Zigger. You actually can't decline somebody's partner request" Admin told him.  
"No!" Ziggy yelled.

"PANTZ! Omg it's been so long since we've like fucked we need to totes work together today and reignite our unforgettable friendship!" Joe screamed into Pantz' ear.  
"Alright alright alright" Pantz replied.

"Alright Pukedie. The time has come for us to work together..." Cloud said.

Luke looked at Cloud's feet.

[Cloud in le confession toilet]  
"Luke doesn't like me, but well we're broskis, no doubt. He's been kind of loafing around quietly so far, which means I will have more lines when the focus is on us. Which means more time to promote Melee."  
[le end]

Pseudonym, Element, DryBones, Carz, and DaUser were the remaining ones without a teammate.

"Hmm, I want to team with-" Element began.  
"Element you do with DryBones and Pseudonym will be with Carz and DaUsername." Admin ordered.  
"Bullshit? I thought we could pick teams" Element complained.  
"Yeah well we didn't want too many players picking the same people they teamed up with in the last challenge. More variety is fun!" Admin explained.

"Hi I'm DryBones" DryBones greeted.  
"Yes, we have met" Element replied.

"hell" Carz said  
"I" DaUsername said.  
"Looks like I got on the A-team" Pseudo said.

"Now, on your mark, get set-"

Joe and Pantz started walking away.

"Uh, what are you doing?" Admin asked.  
"Starting the challenge" Joe yelled back.  
"You're supposed to wait until I say go" Admin said.  
"Oh, haha sorry, I didn't know. You should have explained that" Joe laughed.  
"It's a starting procedure. It's implied." Admin said.

"Ready, G-

"whoa whoa whoa holy shit slow down you didn't even say set that time I was so unprepared" Joe said.

"Just go already" Admin sighed.

All of the haikuers, split into 17 pairings, set off on a race to the Christ the Redeemer.

Nicholas (crazycomics) and J were running down a street when J's attention was caught by a wandering rabbit, bringing him to a halt.

"Oh my goooooooosh, it's so cute!" J squealed.  
"Come to think of it, if would be really cool of there was a rabbit character in morenatsu!" J thought as he picked up the rabbit.  
"So you find an animal and the first thing you think of is yiffing it up in your yiffy fantasy game" Nicholas said.  
"No, I didn't mean it like that!" J blushed.  
"J, put the rabbit down" Nicholas commanded.  
"But don't you know? The foot of a rabbit can bring good luck!" J explained.  
"Really J? First you want to have sexual relations with the rabbit and now you have a foot fetish for it?" Nicholas asked.  
"Let's just keep it for good luck! After all, Gluvr might like it, being a "rabbitwanter" and all haha" J laughed.

Nicholas grabbed the rabbit out of J's hands and took his pocket knife out, slicing the rabbit's throat. Nicholas snapped the head off like a twig and shoved the knife into the rabbit's stomach, carving around it to pull the guts out. He then took one hand on each side of the rabbit's body and pulled until they heard a snap and the spine of the rabbit fell apart. He then cut the foot off.

"Here you go" Nicholas said, tossing J the rabbit's foot.

Mike and Berserker were running by.

"Juicy!" Mike exclaimed, picking the rabbit's body up and squeezing all the blood out into his mouth.  
"Rabbit...Yin Yang Yo...Kyle Massey...CORY BAXTER" Berserker screamed.  
"Rabbit...Yin Yang Yo...Kyle Massey...CORY BAXTER" Mike repeated.  
"Rabbit...Yin Yang Yo...Kyle Massey...CORY BAXTER" Mike repeated.  
"Rabbit...Yin Yang Yo...Kyle Massey...CORY BAXTER" Mike repeated.  
"Rabbit...Yin Yang Yo...Kyle Massey...CORY BAXTER" Mike repeated.  
"Rabbit...Yin Yang Yo...Kyle Massey...CORY BAXTER" Mike repeated.

[Mike in le confession toilet]  
"Whenever there's a hot new juicy shitpost I have to repost if 5 times! It's a krogre tradition"  
[le end]

Kirby and Jacob were walking down a street when they saw a homeless person.

"Wow...hey we should take his money it will be funny" Kirby suggested.  
"No way Jose" Jacob said.  
"Did somebody call for me ese?" the homeless person asked.  
"Here hold my phone and take a pic of me mugging him" Kirby said, handing Jacob her phone.  
"I can hear you ese" the homeless person said.  
"It's alright he doesn't speak English he won't understand us" Kirby said.  
"This doesn't feel right though!" Jacob complained.  
"Well actually maybe they should of thought not to become homeless before complaining about their treatment. Ever think of that?" Nicholas asked as he and J walked by.  
"Selfie!" Kirby said, shaking the homeless man's tin.

Marrowsky and Shinxy were at the entrance to the Tijuja Forest, the urban forest which contains the statue of Jesus they were racing to, sitting at the leak of the Corcovado mountain.

"All this nature is burning my eyes" Shinxy said, rubbing his eyes.  
"I think your nature is NEET" Marrowsky replied.  
"Aw thanks Marrowsky...I think you're neat too 3" Shinxy giggled, rubbing against Marrowsky's body.  
"Murrrr~ Wanna yiff xd" he purred.  
"No." Marrowsky said blankly.

Some birds flew by and Shinxy jumped at them trying to swipe them.

"What are you doing?" Marrowsky asked.  
"Chasing birds like a cute lil Shinx xd" Shinxy answered.  
"I hope you win this show" Marrowsky stated.

Alice, Riley, and Lemon were entering the Tojuja forest as well.

"So you guys gonna get the new Song Xpeira Z4? Pretty cumworthy I must say" Riley said.  
"No" both of them replied.  
"Certainly beats windows phones. Did you know they haven't gotten a Kik update since 2012?" Riley reminded them.  
"That's interesting, Riley" Lemon said.  
"Riley when are you going to review EarthBound?" Alice asked.  
"Might be awhile, I lost the SNES cartridge. Put it in a safe and my dad lost is so..." Riley explained.  
"You could just buy it on the eShop" Alice said.  
"But...then I couldn't show the game..." Riley forwned.  
"In the end...it was the safe that kept it unsafe..." Lemon said.

Two Brazilian girls walked by them. One looked at Riley and giggled.

"Hey there, check out my YouTube. GenesisFrenzy. Ca-cli" Riley said, shooting them with a finger gun gesture.  
"Ca-cli?" Alice asked.  
"Excuse me for not knowing the proper words" Riley crossed his arms.  
"Just click your tongue :s" Alice said.  
"It's easier said than done" Riley complained.  
"Are you guys going to see the statue of Christ?" one of the girls asked.  
"Of course. Gotta get our Jesus on" Lemon said.  
"Maybe we can walk together" she smiled.  
"Of course" Lemon said.

[Riley in le confession toilet]  
"Oh shit the girls are all over me. I have to be straight with them though, I have a boyfriend..I mean girlfriend. That was a slip of the tongue. Fuck take that out I really don't have a boyfriend. Actually keep it in I'll play it off as a ."  
[le end]

Rydli and Ziggy were standing by a stream. A girl was giggling as Rydli swooned her.

"Eata mujer hermosa" Rydli said fluently, kissing her hand, making her giggle.  
"Nice lie Rydli. This is Brazil, they speak Portuguese." Ziggy said.  
"Not everyone in this city has to speak the same language you racist swine. And I'm from Spain" she said, kicking Ziggy square in the nuts and walking away.  
"Kys Rydli" Ziggy said, grabbing his nuts.  
"Why so paranoid? You said it, not me" Rydli shrugged.  
"Because. Because. Kys Rydli." Ziggy said again.

The two continued walking through the forest.

"You know Rydli, I think we could be good pals if you would just put in the effort to get to know me. As they say in Portuguese, "Eu não sei português!"" Rydli said with his eyes closed and a finger in the air.  
"Topkys" Ziggy folded his arms.  
"Your top jokes are bottomlel" Rydli said.  
"Whoa hey slow down there buddy no need for online bullying now" Ziggy said.  
"You've been saying kys all afternoon" Rydli arched a brow.  
"And for very good reason!" Ziggy snapped.

Mr. Moogle and GingeraleDragon were walking by taunay waterfalls.  
GingeraleDragon recorded a video with his New! Cool 3DS.

"actually using the video functionality of the 3DS" Mr. Moogle said.  
"It looks cool in 3D okay. You're just jealous because you left your 3DS at home. I've streetpassed like 50 people today alone. Most of them the haikuers for the 40th time since we started this trip" Gingerale said.  
"I didn't think I would need it, it just slipped my mind!" Moogle said.  
"Oh well, consoles suck anyway. PC master race bro" Gingerale said.  
"PC? More like PC...the other PC!" Mr. Moogle joked.  
"Yeah sure" Gingerale said.

Cloud and Luke were working their way through downtown, not saying anything to each other.

"So...this place is fun" Cloud said awkwardly.

Luke didn't respond.

"It ain't gonna suck itself" Cloud said.

Luke didn't respond.

"Stop talking subhuman"

Luke didn't respond.

[Cloud in le confession toilet]  
"Ok so my clever raunchy humor and satirical outlook on political agenda may not shine it's best in one on one conversations, but it's mostly just because Luke is a freak. I should have chosen someone else to partner with and let him be with another freak, who I don't care."  
[le end]

Reu and Stickboy were wandering downtown. They were was eating churrascos off a stick as they were walking.

"Man these are good" Stickboy said as he took another bite.  
"Yeah, I'd say they are a-ok!" Reu agreed.  
"More like a-ok!" Stickboy said, imitating Ness' voice.

They both laughed.

"Classic. Ah yes I just remembered, we both have a Ness amiibo" Reu said.  
"Well I don't mean to flaunt but I have every Smash amiibo, so far anyway" Stickboy said.  
"Nice. Even Wii Fit Trainer?" Reu asked.  
"Especially...Wii Fit Trainer..." Stickboy said.

As they were walking towards the Praca do Monroe fountain Reu's jaw dropped and he dropped his stick of meat.

"aw dude we can't review this on yelp if we don't finish it" Stickboy complained, crouching down to pick it up.  
"It's...him..." Reu said.

It was Caesar Zeppeli sitting on the fountain.

Caesar was punching the shit out of the pigeons until he noticed Reu and Stickboy.

"Oh, fancy meeting you here" Caesar greeted.  
"Did you stalk us?" Reu asked.  
"No. I don't like your attitude. Let's fight" Caesar said, pulling his fists up.  
"What? But I-

Caesar punched Reu, causing him to fall on the ground unconsciously.

"You loser you're not supposed to get KOd we're supposed to fight and spark a rivalry! Ugh." Caesar complained.  
"You asshat now I have to carry him all the way to that statue thing" Stickboy said, trying to pick Reu up.  
"Don't strain yourself

Caesar brought his hands together and summoned a swarm of bubbles, which picked Reu and Stickboy up.

"Fucking bubbles!" Stickboy exclaimed.  
"I will bring you pepperonis to the statue" Caesar announced.

Element and DryBones were walking through the forest.

"Do you want to play with my birthday scenarios?" DryBones asked.  
"I guess DryBones" Element said.  
"If your birthday is in January, you KILL _! NOW! HE IS BEING A REAL IDIOT!" DryBones said.  
"My birthday isn't in January DryBones" Element said.  
"If your birthday is in February, DON'T KILL _! HE IS MY BEST FRIEND!" DryBones said.  
"I don't need to hear all of this just skip to my birthday" Element said.  
"When's your birthday?" DryBones asked.  
"It's in my username" Element rolled his eyes.  
"Hmm...so..."  
"September 21st."  
"People like Alek that turn 12 in 2015 were born in 2003."  
"Fascinating." Element replied.

[Element in le confession toilet]  
"I don't have a bloody problem with DryBones, and I'm certainly not going to make fun of him or anything. But...I don't know...he did save me back in that sand country, I'll give him that.  
Element reached for some toilet paper but there weren't any.  
"What the hell, how am I supposed to wipe?"  
The vacuum stuck itself in Element's ass and all of his feces were sucked out, then some water squirted to clean it.  
[le end]

Grenade and Bless were scaling the Corcovado mountain.

"There sure are lot of bushes around here. Not as bushy as my dick though." Bless said.  
"Now come on Bless, if you keep talking like that you're gonna be grounded for 101737492028198 years."  
Grenade said.  
"The Jews deserved it" Bless said.

[Bless in le confession toilet]  
"Me and Cam have been friends for awhile. Partnering with him today made me realize what great friends we are"  
Bless' anus is vacuumed.  
"Oh..."  
Bless stuck his butt deeper in the toilet to get more of the sensation.  
[le end]

"Are you going to ironically vote for Trump to get rid of all the Mexicams?" Bless asked.  
"Bless I'm Canadian." Grenade reminded home  
"Fuck you" Bless said.  
"You mad bro :D" Grenade replied.  
"I" Bless said.

Robot was carrying Sam as he ran through the forest making their way to the statue.

"Take a right here" Robot said.  
"Bitch I don't take orders from a woman" Sam screamed, taking a left and running into a tree.

Robot airdodged the tree and landed safely.  
Robot grabbed Sam's leg and dragged him to the correct direction

Eden and Jp were running up the mountain, nearing the summit.

"Bet I can get there first" Jp challenged.  
"Yeah probably" Eden admitted.  
"No you're supposed to take me up on that and try to beat me" Jp said.  
"I'm sorry I didn't know you were in charge of how I react" Eden narrowed her eyes.  
"Just take me up on the challenge and race me to the stop to create tension" Jp pleaded.  
"Maybe I don't WANT to create tension and race you" Eden complained.  
"You're just mad because you don't want to race me" Jp said.  
"Yeah" Eden agreed.  
"So are we gonna race?" Jp asked as she ran into a pole.  
"Nice one, J-pee!" Eden laughed.

Eden was laughing so hard at her own joke that she fell down and couldn't get back up because of how hard she was laughing.

StarForce and Isaac were walking slowly behind many of the others, holding hands.

"So you like Rick and Morty right?" StarForce asked.  
"Yes." Isaac said.  
"Well that concludes that conversation" StarForce said.

Pseudonym, Carz, and DaUbername were in the downtown area. Carz was screaming at toddlers wearing Minions t-shirts while DaUser was eating a banana.

"Banana? FUCK MINIONS" Carz shouted, kicking DaUser.  
"Come on guys we need to catch up with the others" Pseudonym urged them.  
"oh? Yes." DaUser said.  
"Goanimate" Carz said.  
"a" DaUser said.  
"Just follow me" Pseudonym sighed.

Blooberri was drinking a smoothie and Sunnia smacked it into her face, then took a photo of her face covered with smoothie.

"Why did you that? Now I got liquid in my ears. LIQUID!" Bloo shouted for emphasis.  
"For choosing banana blatz over strawberry splat. Also it will look funny in my Bloo selfie collection" Sunnia explained.

Bloo sighed and they continued walking when she saw a can of chef boyardee on a market stand.

"Oo oo we should have chef boyardee!" Bloo suggested excitedly, picking up the can.  
"No Bloo we already got smoothies." Sunnia said, putting the can back on the stand.  
"But I love chef..." Bloo said sadly as they walked away.

As the got further away, the can fell off the stand and started rolling towards them.

"Nicholas is such a little shit" Joe said to Pantz.  
"He's cool man" Pantz replied.  
"Ikr his ironic mvs make me go hangry witch" Joe agreed.  
"Whatever you say man, I'm just here enjoying this nice aesthetic" Pantz said as she gazed around.  
"Haha you are SO rad Pantz I just wanna lay you down and...😥😘👿👿👿...Nd...and read Nicholas' images because he's such a hottie" Joe admitted.  
"Is sand called sand because it's between the sea and the land?" Pantz asked.

The two reached the summit and looked up at the statue of Christ.

"Dude, dude. Get a picture of me posing in front of the statue" Pantz said, handing Joe a camera.  
"A camera? What is this 2002? Why not just use your phone?" Joe asked.  
"Just take it dude" Pantz said.

"Welcome, Pantz and Joe. You two are the first to arrive" Admin greeted them.  
"Wow that's awesome we are like amazing!" Joe said.  
"Too bad getting here first doesn't mean jack shit. Regardless of when you get here, it really doesn't matter. The next challenge: from the top of the statue, hang glide off all the way to the copacabana beach." Admin announced, monitoring his hand to the beach sitting across the mountain and buildings.  
"Your time will be recorded and added up with everyone else on your team. The best overall time will win you the challenge" Admin explained.  
"But we have more pairing than the other team..." Pantz noted.  
"Correctamondo, in a challenge such as this, less players are more beneficial. So you're gonna have to work even harder if you want to win. And while we're at it-"

Ding!

"Oh boy..." Joe said.  
"Now soothe those beautiful skies with your not-so-beautiful singing" Admin ordered.  
"Thanks bro" Pantz said.

As Robot and Sam arrived next, Pantz and Joe put both hands on the handles and leaped off the Christ the Redeemer, letting the wind glide them down.

[Song #5 - Fly]  
(To the tune of I Will Survive)  
Pantz: At first I was afraid  
I was petrified  
Joe: Kept thinking I would never jump  
off this thing and glide

(Sam and Robot leap off)

Robot: But then I thought about the skill  
it takes to win this game  
Sam: it will give us fame  
Just like the Notre Dame

(Marrowsky and Shinxy leap off))

Marrowsky: and so we go  
and now we're here  
Shinxy: We just took the jump  
so we could soar throughout the air

(Mr. Moogle and GingeraleDragon leap off)

Mr. Moogle: I should have brought my 3DS  
GingeraleDragon: I should have worn my Feeling It shirt

(Pseudonym, DaUser, and Carz leap off)

Pseudonym: You better hold on tight,  
or we're in for a world of hurt

DaUser: Soar on now soar, this descent is cray  
just steer this thing alright  
Carz: 'cause Bless is fucking gay

(Nicholas and J leap off)

Nicholas: J you gotta face the facts, the rabbit is bye bye  
J: Do you think we're doomed  
Do you think we'll fall off and die

(Rydli and Ziggy leap off)

Rydli: Oh no, I'll fly  
(Ziggy is slapping Rydli)  
Ziggy: High up in the sky  
(Ziggy falls but Rydli catches him, Ziggy slaps his hand away and falls of)

(Eden and Jp leap off)

Jp: Oh as long as I know how to steer  
I will soar very high  
Eden: I've got my fear of heights  
(Eden is looking down frantically)  
But I'll overcome my freights

(Mike and Berserker leap off)

Berserker: but we'll fly  
Mike: and likely fall and die! (hey-hey)  
(Mike steers the glider directly down and they speed up)

(Bless and Grenade leap off)

Bless: If you cum while you're flying  
it's called seagulling  
(Bless masturbates)  
Grenade: Put that away Bless  
No one wants to see your dingaling

(Alice, Lemon, and Riley leap off)

Lemon: and I spent all these few nights  
Regretting our losing streak  
Riley: But we'll fly  
Alice: Oh so high up in the sky

(Cloud and Luke leap off)

Luke: and so we jump  
Cloud: wtf lost my ump

(StarForce and Isaac leap off)

StarForce: I'm holding on tight so I  
Won't let go of you  
and so we won't mess up and lose  
(StarForce continues to hold onto Isaac's hand)  
Isaac: Alright whatever you say dude  
and now I'm focused on the landing  
on the beach below our altitude

(Blooberri and Sunnia leap off)

Blooberri: Soar on now soar, this descent is cray  
just steer this thing alright  
Sunnia: 'cause Bless is fucking gay

(Kirby and Jacob leap off)

Kirby: The sandy shore beach, I see it in our reach, not gonna lie  
Jacob: Do you think we're doomed  
Do you think we'll fall off and die

(Stickboy and Reu leap off)

Stickboy: Oh no, I'll fly  
Reu: High up in the sky

(Element and DryBones leap off)

Element: Oh as long as I know how to steer  
I will soar very high  
DryBones: I've got fortunes on my wheel  
If you lose I know that feel  
(DryBones slips but Element catches him and pulls him back up)

All: and I'll fly  
I will fly  
[le big finish]

All of the haikuers landed on the beach two to three at a time. Element and DryBones were the second to last to land.  
Ziggy came limping onto the beach with tangled up hair.

"Looks like Ziggy lost his ump" Cloud noted.

"What happened to Caesar?" Reu asked, scratching his head.  
"After he used his fucking bubbles to get us to the summit he told me to tell you to awaken your hamon before you meet with him again, whatever that shit means" Stickboy said.  
"Hamon? Hmm..." Reu thought.

The Brazilian girls giggled next to Alice, Riley, and Lemon.  
Riley sighed.

"Alright girl, I hate to break this to you, but...I'm already in a relationship" he said sadly to one of them.  
"Oh...I'm not interested in you" she said.  
"Oh" Riley responded.  
"I have a boyfriend" she said.  
"Oh..." Riley responded.  
"And I was just hanging out with you because my friend was the one with the crush." She said.  
"Oh..." Riley responded.  
"And she was actually into your friend Lemon, not you" she said.  
"Oh..." Riley responded.  
"And she's actually a lesbian and thought Lemon was a girl"  
"Oh..." Riley responded.  
"Wow, golly I'm flattered" Lemon blushed.

Kirby and Jacob came flying in, knocking into Lemon and kicking him in the head to the ground.

"Extreeeeeme!" Jacob cheered.

"And that makes our last pair. Now to add up all the scores." Admin declared.

Pantz and Joe: 3:30  
Pantz and Joe waited for the other results in anticipation.  
Cloud and Luke: 3:15  
Cloud coughed and Luke shrugged.  
Kirby and Jacob: 2:47  
Kirby and Jacob high fived but Kirby missed and hit Jacob in the face.  
Element and DryBones: 2:56  
Element tipped his fedora and DryBones zipped his pants.  
Bless and Grenade: 2:50  
Bless cracked his shoulder and Grenade waited with a blank expression.  
DaUsername Pseudonym and Carz: 1:34  
"Looks like our combined weight made us fall faster" Pseudonym said, feeling DauSer's stomach.  
Eden and Jp: 3:10  
Eden frowned and Jp whistled.  
Marrowsky and Shinxy: 2:59  
Marrowsky smiled and Shinxh brushed up against him.  
Rydli and Ziggy: 1:30  
"Wow you guys were really quick" Jp said.  
"It's no big deal" Rydli said, checking his fingernails.  
"Actually, Rydli may have finished at 1:30, but Ziggy threw himself off. Which means they didn't finish together. For that, I'm penalizing Ziggy by adding an extra 5 minutes" Admin announced.  
"lol toprude" Ziggy laughed.  
Total team time: 29.5 minutes

"Thanks, Ziggy" his team said collectively.

Reu and Stickboy: 2:45  
Reu crossed his arms and Stickboy looked disinterested.  
J and Nicholas: 2:48  
J rubbed his lucky rabbit foot and Nicholas rolled his arm.  
Robot and Sam: 2:01  
Robot watched with a straight expression, Sam smirked.  
GingeraleDragon and Mr. Moogle: 2:37  
Gingerale crossed his arms, Moogle smiled.  
Sunnia and Blooberri: 3:12  
Bloo hunched over sadly, Sunnia didn't care.  
StarForce and Isaac: 3:00  
StarForce held tightly onto Isaac's hand.  
Alice Riley and Lemon: 1:50  
Alice smiled, Riley have a thumbs up, Lemon are himself.  
Mike and Berserker: 0:40  
"Jesus Christ Mike. Literally Jesus Christ because we jumped off of him" Element said.  
"Just showin my strats o3o" Mike said giving a thumbs up.  
Their glider had a huge hole in it.  
Berserker was laying on the ground wincing in pain.  
Total team time: 18.8 minutes

"You see, we still would have lost even if I didn't get my penalty" Ziggy said.  
"We finally win another challenge. Amazing" Isaac said.  
"Right. You would win. If that was the final challenge. But we still have one more. So everyone get ready. Your total time will be important in the next challenge" Admin explained.

Everyone moaned.  
A girl walked up to Rydli.

"Hey do you want my number?" she asked him.  
"Please stranger I'm busy right now..." Rydli sighed, walking away.  
"Kys Rydli" Ziggy said.  
"Rydli just stop talking to me. I don't care about your insults" Rydli said.

Everyone was standing with their team wearing shorts. They were inside a large soccer stadium. A circular rooftop was above them.

"Welcome to the maracanã stadium. Host of the World Cup in 1950 and 2014 and the location for your final challenge here today. Football is popular in Brazil after all" Admin said, trying to kick a soccer ball into his hands and failing.  
"Nice, I love sports" Mr. Moogle exclaimed.  
"Same here. I'm a tennis player!" Rydli said, jumping up and down.  
"Good why don't you touch the ball and fucking disqualify yourself. Good luck out there." Nicholas said.  
"Here's how the challenge works: I will periodically shoot out soccer balls onto the field. You must kick the soccer balls into the other team's net. What makes this different from regular soccer is that there will be multiple balls on the field at once" Admin explained.

Cloud and Bless giggled.

"Really? Anyways, you can choose to either play offensively or defensively, but not strictly one or the other. There can also only be one goalie at a time. ALSO, if you ever touch the balls with your hands-

Cloud and Bless giggled again, making Admin sigh.

"If you touch the ball with your hands you can't participate in the challenge anymore. The Troll Slaiyers have the advantage of of more players, but Team Jacob has more time to score points. Each team has a specific amount of time to score: the total time the other team got during the previous challenge. So Troll Slaiyers get 19 minutes. Jacobs you get 30" Admin instructed.  
"Now everyone get on your team's side of the field. I will throw the first ball to the team that can tell me this: what is the specific heat capacity of sodium nitrate?" Admin asked.

Most of the haikuers looked around puzzled, Rydli took a calculator out of his pocket. Robot was calculating the number in her head but Bless said it before she could

"93.05 J/mol K" Bless said.  
"Correct, you get the first ball!" Admin said excitedly, kicking the ball over to him.

Admin blew his whistle, initiating the game.  
Bless kicked the ball off the field. Luke was the goalie for the Troll Slaiyers and Stickbkoy was the goalie for Team Jacob.

"Bless what the heck man why did you do that?" Pantz asked.  
"Because I like chicken" Bless answered.

Cloud was running as fast as he could to the ball.

[Cloud in le confession toilet]  
"Yeah, I'm pretty fast. I was on the track team after all. What were you doing with your life?"  
[le end]

Cloud kicked the ball over to Rydli who kicked it into the other team's net.

"Goooooooooooooal!" Joe screamed.

Admin kicked two balls onto the field.  
Nicholas walked over and kicked Cloud in the kneecap, making him fall down. He then kicked Cloud's head and ran with the ball between his legs until he made it to the Troll Slaiyers net. He kicked it into Luke's head, making Luke fall backwards and the ball made it in.

"Goooooooooooooooo!" Joe screamed.  
"Are you gonna do that every time?" Eden asked with her ears plugged.

Rydli was making his way across the field with one of the balls as Admin threw two more on the field. Lemon was a few feet away. Rydli smirked and kicked the ball upwards, landing in Lemon's hands.

"And Lemon is out!" Admin declared with a blow of the whistle.  
"Aww..." Lemon said as he looked at the ball in his hand.

Jacob ran over to the Jacob's side trying to play defensively. He got in position and guarded Reu, who had the ball.

Nicholas ran up behind and grabbed Jacob and Sam and Mike went up in front of Jacob and kept kicking and punching him as Reu went around.

Marrowsky kicked a ball effortlessly into the Jacob's net. Stickboy yawned as the ball went past him.

"Gooooooooooooooal!" Joe screamed.

Shinxy was chasing a ball and playing with it.  
A ball landed near Element and he traveled with it until he got to Moogle and Gingerale.

"Easy out" Gingerale laughed.

Element narrowed his eyes and tried to do something epic but tripped over the ball. Moogle and Gingerale let their guard down and Element spun his body on the ground around and kicked the ball between their legs into the goal.

"Goooooooooooooal!" Joe screamed.  
"Can we deport Joe or something?" Pseudonym asked.

StarForce was still holding Isaac's hand.

"StarForce this isn't really necessary anymore the buddy thing is over" Isaac said.  
"NO way, I'm not messing up" StarForce said.  
"StarForce I wasn't really that upset about the challenge I was just looking for a chance to get a line" Robot said.

As Robot was saying that a ball knocked off her head. She turned around to see it was Dauser. Her eyes turned red as she charged a strong beam and chased DaUser down to fry him.  
Ziggy showed up with a ball at his feet.  
Isaac tried to break away but StarForce insisted on holding his hand.

"StarForce let...go..." Isaac pleaded, pulling away.

Ziggy slowly worked his away around them but StarForce pulled Isaac up and spun around in a 360 turn, knocking Ziggy over.

Rydli kicked a ball into Alice's hands. Then in Riley's hands. Then in Sunnia's hands.  
Each time they dropped a ball he kicked it into the goal and scored another point for his team.

"Goooo-  
Goooo-  
G-  
Goooooooooooooooooal!" Joe screamed.  
"AAAAAAAAAAAAH" Sam roared, charging at Luke with full speed, kicking the ball into the net.

"Gooooooooooal" Joe screamed.

"5 minutes left for the Troll Slaiyers, but 16 for Team Jacob. Troll Slaiyers have 20 points, Jacobs 5." Admin shouted over a megaphone.

Pseudonym traveled the ball near the Jacob's net, J tried defending the ball but Pseudo faked him out, causing J to fall over as Pseudo kicked the ball into the net.

"Gooooooooal!" Joe screamed.

Admin took some tape and taped Joe's mouthy shut.

"shit" Carz said, grabbing a ball and knocking it off Berserker's head.  
"Carz you're out" Admin shouted.

Kirby and Grenade were working together, kicking the ball back and forth to tech other as they approached the Jacob goal. Finally Jacob ran up and took the final kick into the goal.

"We're getting creamed" Mr. Moogle said.  
"Yeah well do something about it bi*tch" Nicholas said.  
"You're right" Moogle said confidently.

Moogle ripped his shirt off and ran as fast he could down the field, kicking the ball into Cloud's face. Then. Bless' face. Then he kicked it into Luke's face, who fell back into the net.  
DryBones went to kick a ball but Blooberri picked it up, causing him to kick the air and fall on his back.

"Nice one blockhead" Blooberri said.

"Out!" Admin blew his whistle.

Blooberri placed the ball in DryBones' hands so it disqualified him too.

Jp kicked a ball to the other side, but it stuck StarForce and Isaac's held hands, and reflected back and stuck Jp's head.

Admin blew his whistle.

"Isaac and StarForce, ooooooout"

"Sigh." Isaac said.  
"Did you guys say sigh?" StarForce asked.  
"Do you have a problem with that?" Isaac asked.

The clock on the Troll Slaiyers' side hit 0 and a loud bzzzzzt went off.

"Troll Slaiyers you are out of time, final score 32. Team Jacob currently has 22. If they can make 11 goals in 11 minutes, they will win" Admin announced.  
"Are we allowed to touch the balls?" Rydli asked.  
"Sure, you just can't score points" Admin said.

Berserker kicked a ball over but Rydli blocked it.

"Oh no. They're using...effort." Nicholas narrowed his eyes.  
"I got this bro" Sam said, running over and kicking Rydli in the nuts.

Sam traveled with the ball all the way to the Slaiyers net as Rydli fell to the ground clutching his balls.

[Rydli in le confession toilet]  
"Sam...you will regret that..."  
[le end]

Sam kicked another ball at the net but Luke blocked it, so Sam headbutted Luke and kicked it in again. Moogle passed another one to Sam but Jacob and Marrowsky rushed him, shoving him on the ground. As the ball rolled over they grabbed Sam's hand and made it touch the ball.

"And Sam is out" Admin said with the blow of a whistle.  
"NOOOOO! Borch'nnnnnnnnnl" Sam shouted, biting at Jacob's ear.

The clock ticked down to 5 minutes and Team Jacob still needed 9 goals.

"We're running out of time I don't think we're gonna make it!" J worried.

Nicholas bitchslapped J and took his rabbit's foot.

"We are not losing again. Drastic times call for drastic measures. We're gonna have to use our secret power. You ready Reu?" Nicholas asked.  
"What? Me? Why me? How long has it been since we've actually spoken to each other?" Reu asked.  
"That doesn't matter now. We have to unleash our power." Nicholas said.  
"What Do You Mean?" Reu asked.

Nicholas took Reu's hand and placed it on his, they both held onto the rabbit foot as a mythical energy enveloped around them.

The Troll Slaiyers and Team Jacob backed up in separate directions as the wind strongly blew around Nicholas and Reu.  
Joe was eating popcorn but it bounced off her taped mouth, Mike was eating baby rabbit heads.  
Nicholas' mouth grew large and he chopped down on Reu's whole body. Reu slid down Nicholas' throat and into his belly.  
Element's hand slowly went down his pants but Marrowsky slapped him and he took them out.

"No!" he said.

Nicholas' stomach grew larger and larger until something exploded out of it, splashing a liquid all around it, and Nicholas' body fell to the ground, all the life sucking out of it like a balloon and it immediately decomposed into the ground. The thing that emerged from his stomach  
Admin tapped his watch, the timer clicked down to 3 minutes.  
The figure rose up, it was a cell like Reuniclus with a green outer soft shell, but inside it was a tiny creature with a red stomach and claws and feet that extended out of the shell. And a long leaf from the top of its head all the way down its back.

"What. The fuck." Element said.  
"Satan's child" Mike exclaimed.  
"We are Reuniclas" it said, Reu and Nicholas' voices speaking simultaneously.  
"Is this fusion supposed to help us win?" Lemon asked.  
"No our long transformation process was supposed to distract everyone while Berserker kicked a bunch of balls into the Troll Slaiyers goal.  
Everyone turned around to see Berk kicking one last soccer ball in the net.

A large bzzzzzt noise went off and everyone looked up to see the time ran out. They were both tied at 32 points.

"Oh darn. A tie. Guess no one has to go home, right?" Lemon asked.  
"Wrong. We're gonna have a sudden death round! Two members from each team. One ball. One score." Admin declared.  
"Alright, I say we send out the fetus thing-" Robot started.  
"Reuniclas" Reuniclas corrected.  
"Right. That and Sam." Robot suggested.  
"Let me do this" Gingerale said.  
"Ok lol" Robot said.  
"What the duck bro!?" Sam shouted.

Reuniclas and Gingerale got on the field. On the other side, Ziggy and Pantz were selected.  
A single ball landed in the center of the field, and all four rushed for it.

"Stop going so fast!" Reuniclas complained.  
"Stop going so slow!" Reuniclas shot back.  
"Move your foot at the same speed as mine, we have to have matching movements"  
"Match this" Reuniclas said, punching himself.

Reuniclas punched himself back.

Gingerale dove at the ball, kicking it high up. Ziggy waited for it to come back down and butted his head on toward Pantz, who kicked it over Gingerale's head. They were passing the ball back in forth, running up the field. Gingerale chased them down. They were getting closer to Team Jacob's goal. 50 feet, 30 feet...  
They past Reuniclas who was fighting himself on the ground.  
Ziggy went in for one final kick but Gingerale dived at the ball, grabbing it with both hands and going into the hedgehog position as Ziggy's foot kicked him instead of the ball. They were standing 4 feet away from Team Jacob's net.

"Give us the ball, dude. Face it you lost!" Ziggy said, kicking Gingerale over and over again.

Gingerale held onto the ball as Ziggy kept kicking, not letting Ziggy get to it.

"Gingerale, you're out" Admin said.

Reuniclas stopped fighting as they saw Gingerale getting kicked. They got up and wobbled a bit.

"Just focus your mind with mine" Reuniclas said.  
"What does that evn mean" Reuniclas asked.  
"Just move our body as one" Reuniclas said back.  
"Shit up shit up shit il shit up agahagagagahsjsjsjjszj" Reuniclas said.

Ziggy kept kicking Gingerale, Pantz stood by wincing as she watched.

"I...will not...let my team down..." Gingerale coughed, slowly getting up.  
"Finally, now I can-"  
Gingerale kicked Ziggy's jaw, knocking him back.

Everyone sitting on the stands was on the edge of their seats.  
The ball rolled towards the goal but was stopped by a green foot. It was the grinch, he kicked it over to Reuniclas who rose his foot up and power kicked it, the soccer ball flew all the way across the stadium, so fast a fire would be on it if this was an unrealistic piece but we're keeping this nonfictional and 100% could possibly happen. The ball landed a few feet from the Troll Slaiyers' net, bouncing into it.

"AND TEAM JACOB WINS!" Admin shouted, rising up and blowing his whistle.  
"Yeah!" all of Team Jacob cheered, pumping their hands in the air.  
"Yay!" Jacob cheered.  
"No, Jacob. You aren't actually on Team Jacob." Grenade said.  
"Aww.." Jacob frowned.

The L-610 was flying over the seas of Brazil with the haikuers on board. The Troll Slaiyers were sitting around the elimination room as Admin walked in with the ballot results.

"So, for the second time, Troll Slaiyers are sending somebody home. After tonight, only 18 Slaiyers will continue." Admin announced.  
"Or maybe more than one! For tonight, I supply a surprise." Admin declared, wheeling out something hidden by a large sheet.  
"Oh do we get reward challenges now? Awesome!" Kirby examined.  
"Not exactly! I present you with...the Wheel! Of! Drama!" Admin shouted as he unveiled the giant wheel.  
"Uh did you steal that idea from Wheel of Fortune?" DryBones asked.  
"No shut up. Periodically I will bring out the Wheel of Drama and give it a spin. Your team will be subjected to whatever scenario the wheel lands on. You could face a double elimination, force a random member to switch teams, or an eliminated player could return..." Admin explained as he spun the wheel.  
"What? You made it clear that no one could ever return!" Eden complained.  
"Right, I did say that, to Team Jacob. Did I say that to you guys on the first night? Don't think so. New Admin, new rules, and I say returnees are legal. A new player altogether is also an option" Admin said.  
"That will just drag things on..." Luke quietly said.  
"Don't worry, any scenario where a new or returning contestant joins will also include a double elimination to compensate. We're only allowing one of each for the season, so we're not letting people come back willy-nilly" Admin went on.

The wheel slowed down and one of the options landed on the spinner. Admin inspected it and read it to the team:

"One Member Switches Teams!" he read.  
"Oh! Oh! Can it be me?" Element pleaded.  
"We love you too" Pantz said.  
"The members are randomized as well. And our lucky switchers are...Lukeguy AND Mr. Moogle!" Admin declared.  
"Mm..." Luke mumbled.  
"Now normally all of the votes the member switching out got would be transferred to the one switching into the team, but Luke didn't get any votes, so Mr. Moogle is safe. Luke, you can get out of here!" Admin said.

[Luke in le confession toilet]  
"I was just starting to warm up to my team...they're lucky I even made it here, if haikucon didn't happen to be in my state I wouldn't have come..."  
[le end]

"So with Moogle safe, that leaves 17 Mountain Dews to hand out." Admin began.  
"If I get voted off I don't have to leave right. I mean I'm atheist and allergic to Jesus statues, what if I land on one?" Element asked.  
"No need to worry Element, I'd throw you off anyway. But you're safe, so here you go" Admin said, throwing him a can of Dew.  
"Also safe tonight, we got Pseudonym, Cloud, Pantz, Joe, Carz, Bless, Eden, Jp, Kirby, Marrowsky, DryBones..." Admin continued.

Grenade, Jacob, DaUser, Shinxy, Ziggy, and Rydli were left. Ziggy's neck had bandages covering it, he narrowed his eyes at Rydli who smiled back confidently.

"Rydli and Ziggy, safe!" Admin said, tossing them both cans, Rydli caught his and Ziggy's head got smacked by it.

Grenade, Jacob, DaUser, and Shinxy looked at each other and then at the final three Mountain Dew cans nervously.

"The four of you all received votes. But only one loser will come out. Grenade? Jacob? DaUser or Shinxy? Hmmm, DaUser and Grenade, you two are safe too" Admin said.

DaUser and Grenade high fived.

Shinxy and Jacob began to sweat.

"Only one left." Admin began.

Element looked at Shinxy.

"And it goes..."

Jacob clenched his fists up to his face.

"To..."

Shinxy licked his ass.

"Shinxy!" Admin declared, tossing the can to Shinxy.

"What? Shinxy!? I thought you guys liked me" Jacob complained.  
"Dude you don't even have a haiku account how would you even get the stars?" Jp asked.  
"I don't care, yo." Jacob said, strapping on his backpack.  
"Do you want me to send you memes to calm u" Ziggy asked as he opened his Mountain Dew and it sprayed all over his face.  
"See you wannabes later" Jacob scoffed, tripping on the floor and falling down, where Admin slowly kicked him out of the plane.  
"Jacob..." Cloud said quietly.  
"Seriously though who was that guy?" Kirby asked.  
"Why didn't you guys vote for Rydli?" Ziggy asked.  
"Rydli there's no need to be upset, I didn't exactly do anything wrong..." Rydli defended.  
"Ok first off why have you been calling me Rydi all day what is up with that and second K. Y. S!" Ziggy shouted.  
"Team Jacob's back on their feet, while Jacob himself better hope to land on his feet. With Luke and Moogle on different teams, how will their new companions react? Who will be joining loser town: population 5? Find out next time on HAIKU! DRAMA! WORLD TOUR!

Riley was sitting next to Luke and Alice.

"So, Luke. Interested in the Sony Xperia Z5 Premium?" Riley asked.  
"I thought you said it was the Song Xperia Z4" Alice said.  
"No I didn't I said Sony Xperia Z5...Premium!" Riley shot back.  
"No you said Song."  
"Did not"  
"Did"  
"Did not"  
"Did! Riley did did!"

Luke sighed.

[Reu in le confession toilet]  
"Looks like I need to start focusing more to build up my hamon. Now that I'm aware of my ability to fuse with Nicholas, this could give us an edge..."  
[le end]

[Ziggy in le confession toilet]  
"Fuck Rydli. I'll continue to vote for him each and every time until he gets shoved off this plane."  
Ziggy's ass is sucked into the toilet and is shaken with a water as his fences is vacuumed out.  
"Aaaaa kys"  
[le end]

[Rydli in le confession toilet]  
Rydli is lifting his 5 lb dumbbell.  
"Keep it up Rydli, knock me down. I'd like to see you try."  
[le end]

End of Day 25  
Initiation at 13.16%  
20-8-5 / 7-9-18-12-19 / 23-8-15 / 3-1-13-5 / 23-9-20-8 / 18-25-4-12-9 / 1-18-5 / 19-20-9-12-12 / 23-1-9-20-9-14-7 / 15-14 / 20-8-5 / 16-1-18-11-9-14-7 / 12-15-20


	6. Justin Bieber - 1Day - What Do You Mean

Chapter 6: Justin Bieber - #1Day - What Do You Mean? Post your pic or video!

"FUCKING NORMAL FAGS. GET THE FUCK OFF MY BOARD REEEEEEEEEEE" Mike screamed.  
"It's ok Mike, Luke isn't a normie" Alice reassured.

"I'm Finna Kill a bitch :D!" Mike exclaimed.

Luke crined.

"I forgot how privileged the first class is" Gingerale said as he took a dumpling from a tray.  
"Right Moogle? Moog..." Gingerale sighed.

[GingeraleDragon in le confession toilet]  
"Moogle and I were like Anthony Perkins and Steve Carell. Without him it's just me and Nicholas and 15 irrelevant teammates!"  
[le end]

"Oh man without Moofle I don't know what I will do. Guess we'll just have to replace him with J." Nicholas said.  
"Did someone say my name haha" J blushed.  
"J where have you been." GingeraleDragon asked.  
"I was sleeping in the storage room all night?" J explained.  
"I ate a bunch of chocolate with Marrowsky and I guess I fell asleep chocolate wasted haha" J laughed.  
"J it's been over a week have you been sleeping with the luggage this entire time?" Nicholas asked.  
"Yeah, ahaaha! Haha! Aha!" J laughed.  
"J that's crazy! You need to get your sh*t together" Nicholas said.  
"Were you banging Marrowsky?" Gingerale sighed.  
"Nooooo" J blushed.  
"Really J conspiring with the other team now? You are getting Out Of Control." Nicholas scoffed.  
"No IM NOT" J screamed, picking up a straw and bending it.  
"J." Gingerale said.  
"J that wasn't even outrageous that was just plain rude. Now I'm going to have to get up and get a new straw for my drink and my entire day is going to be ruined now because I'll have to recall what you just did." J said.  
"Cairde Dea-maidin, or as they say in Irish, Good morning friends" Isaac greeted as he walked up to the three.  
"Oh hey Naomi's here. Maybe we can get her to form an alliance with us!" J suggested.  
"Actually I go by Isaac now, and I am now a dude. Just a reminder!" Isaac reminded.  
"J you don't just go around shouting things like "LET'S FORUM AN ALLIANCE AAA IM J IM GAY AAAA" Gingerale mocked.  
"Yeah J with some sneaky salmon juicy things like this, you gotta lay it low" Nicholas said.  
"Come on Nicholas you should know any gay person can't help but be flamboyant" Gingerale said.  
"I'm not flamboyant!" J shrieked in a gay accent.  
"You can't spell flamboyant without boy, which is what I am" Isaac said.

Sam was doing squats with Lemon, who was breathing heavily.

"YO LEMON NOT GONNA LIE THAT ASS IS TIGHT, BUT YOU GOTTA WORK IN THOSE MUSCLES IF YOU WANNA GRIP THAT CLIT KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING?" Sam shouted.  
"I..." Lemon said.

[Lemon in le confession toilet]  
"Sure is nice to have some bonding time with Sam, eh. He's a cool teammate, and, uh...oh man I need to start becoming useful or I'll end up like StarBird. No...the time has come for Lemon to blossom..."  
[le end]

Stickboy was napping in front of his box that contained his amiibo collection.  
Nearby Alice and Mike were conversing about outdated memes and games that Mike played and Alice can't afford, while Luke quietly nodded to some of the things they were saying.  
Riley watched from his seat several feet away and crossed his arms.

[Riley in le confession toilet]  
"So Luke, or as I like to call him, Luke the poo head, is now on our team. Great, just great. The two of us have kind of a rotten history, he likes to kick me from the Kik group for stating my opinion on things. He's a dick plain and simple, that's why I gave up on that shitty app. Did you know it hasn't had an update on Windows phones since 2012? It's been distracting me from my YouTube channel anyway. I have a YouTube by the way, GenesisFrenzy, probably heard of me. Yeah, hit the big 3 double O subscribers awhile ago. All this traveling is pretty good actually for some vlogs. I met some friends in Japan and New York, so if we head there I'll get to reconcile with them."  
"And then we can take over the world" Shadow the Hedgehog said.  
"Shadow don't embarrass me" Riley sighed as he covered his eyes.  
[le end]

"Gee, Riley looks sorta flustered, don't you think?" StarForce asked Robot.  
"Yeah he got removed from the group one too many times and now he hates Lukeguy" Robot explained.  
"What how do you know that?" StarForce asked.  
"Sources." Robot informed as she dumped oil on her.

[Robot in le confession toilet]  
"Both of my experiences on Haiku Drama ended in failure. This time, there's no Red, no Pikby. Even Cheeseguy left the game. No distractions, I got my eye on the prize. With the intellectuality of a robot and no emotion, nothing will keep me down. Except for Kirby, my trash Smash skills, my self esteem, my driving license instructor, any type of criticism, and blaspheming R.O.B. But that won't be an issue."  
[le end]

[Lukeguy in le confession toilet]  
"Guess I should make a generic 'I did shit last time but I'm really gonna do good this time guys I promise!' confessional."  
[le end]

Rydli was doing leg stretches in front of Eden and Jp, who were munching on Fritos. BBQ.

"Ladies" he winked.

Ziggy scowled from his of the bench of which he was seated on.

"Cheer up Zigzagoon. That's a nickname I just came up with. It's pretty clever" Pantz said, patting him on be back.  
"You just gotta be chill, relax man" she said.

Ziggy chortled.

"You're right, Pantz. I need to get back to shitposting things from /b/" Ziggy deemed.  
"Hey Ziggy how's that thing with Aliyah going?" Rydli asked.

Ziggy stood up and opened a door and the wind sucked him out and be plummeted below.

"He's about to be grounded" Carz noted.  
"Maybe we're in Japan and he's gonna land on a giant rice bowl" DryBones suggested.  
"nah" Grenade said.  
"Japanese game shows are cool." DryBones said.  
"You still into South Park, DryBones?" Grenade asked.  
"No it's very potty. Saw the trailer for the new season though." DryBones replied.  
"Yeah I bet, Andre." Grenade said.  
"I miss Ziggy..." Bless sighed.  
"MINIOOOOOOOONS" Carz screamed, pulling out his dick and peeing on Bless, who felt warm.  
"Geez this minion thing is getting a little carried away, don't you think?" Kirby asked.  
"Just give it a few months, he'll move on to post-iconic humor or Jeb Bush shitposting" Cloud said.

[Cloud in le confession toilet]  
"If anyone knows anything about irony, it's me. I'm The Money Guy, but I'm also a the Funny Guy"  
[le end]

"I hope my death is ironic" Bless confessed.  
"Shut up Bless, piece of shit shitposter, you're so bad" Cloud complained.  
"Die!" Bless said, getting up and leaving.  
"A little harsh, no?" Rydli asked.  
"Did you just answer your own question" Cloud folded his arms.  
"No, it's a...you know, it's a thing. People just say that" Rydli responded scratching his back.  
"A thing? Just saying no when you expect someone to say yes? Sounds retarded if you ask me" Cloud rolled his eyes.  
"Anyways, gotta use the can. Just felt like sharing that with you teammies" Cloud proclaimed as he got up and went to le confession toilet.

To Cloud's surprise, none other than Bless was sitting upon le toilet taking a dookie.

"Hi" Bless said.  
"Fuck you! Fuck people who poop with the door open!" Cloud shouted in agony.  
"I agree" DaUser nodded.  
"Oh really? You agree that someone pooping with the door open is unpleasant? That's such a rare thing for me to find people to agree with, I'm glad you threw it out there that you feel that way." Pseudonym said.  
"Hey Pseudo, how's your PC building?" Marrowsky asked.  
"Political Correctness or computer?" Kirby asked.  
"Really? Never make that joke ever again." Pseudonym said.  
"Anyways, it's going swell. I got some Ultra Durable tools, after all" he added.  
"Nicely done, Americano" Marrowsky complimented with a fist bump.  
"Heeeeey murrowsky 3" Shinxy said, climbing on Marrowsky's lap.  
"Not that I don't like the affection, Shinxy, but what happened to Element?" Marrowsky asked.  
"He's ben ignoring meh :c" Shinxy cried.

Marrowsky looked over to see Element conversing with Mr. Moogle.

"So I was like, 'r/ShowerThoughts, amiright?', and everyone in the comments section upvoted my comment" Element laughed, and Moogle laughed too.  
"Yeah well one of my colleagues was telling me about his plans to kill his mom and I was like r/NotInteresting" Moogle laughed.  
"Man it sure is nice having someone I like here" Element smiled.  
"Thanks" Marrowsky said flatly as the camera panned to the rest of the team.  
"Yeah it's kind of ironic how after a three challenge losing streak, my team wins only for me to be switched onto the losing team. Also is there any season where I haven't switched teams?" Mr. Moogle asked.  
"That's not ironic :s" Cloud said.  
"What Do You Mean?" Mr. Moogle asked.  
"Being ironic is like, pooping yourself in public. Or joining a chatroom just to leave. Or misusing the word ironic but catching yourself by pretending it was intentionally done as part of the joke." Cloud explained.  
"Oh boy here we go, Cloud ironic shitposting is not funny." Element snapped.  
"No! I'll show you guys! I'll make this episode a defense on ironic shitposting. You'll see, haikik bias will destroy you all. You'll all rue this day!" Cloud proclaimed, getting up and running away.  
"So anyways, how about them faggots at /v/, amiright?" Mr. Moogle asked.  
"Only if you want cancer" Element laughed.  
"That's why they're named after cigarettes" Mr. Moogle joked.

"s" Shinxy said.  
"a" DaUser said.  
"the" Shinxy said.  
"." DaUser said.  
":ftired:" Shinxy said.  
"oh" DaUser said.  
"Hey, Shinxy. Do you want to play a game?" Marrowsky asked.  
"uh, is it Team Fortress 2?" Shinxy asked.  
"No, it's educational" Marrowsky replied.  
"uh...mm...ahhh...no"  
"Come on, I think it will be helpful. Here's how it works. I'll say a food name that starts with A, then you say one that starts with B, and we keep going back and forth" Marrowsky explained.  
"Ahhh" Shinxy sighed.  
"Apple" Marrowsky began.  
"...banana." Shinxy unwillingly played along.  
"Corn"  
"dick"  
"Eggs"  
"...mm...hmm..." Shinxy started thinking hard.  
"Come on Shinxy you can do it"  
"Um...ahh...A, B, C, D, E...G, H, I, J, L, N, O, P..." Shinxy sang quietly to himself.  
"Shinxy, what letter comes after E?" Marrowsky asked simply.  
"AAAAAAH" Shinxy panicked.

"Attention passengers. Make sure you are not strapped to your seats." Admin announced over the intercom.

The Troll Slaiyers unstrapped themselves as the plane tilted sideways and everyone slid across the floor and out the door screaming. The plane was close enough to the sea that they all landed in it without dying.

"I am wet." Sunnia said

Admin put a megaphone to his mouth as he stood at the plane door.

"Both teams have one boat. Use the instruments provided with the boat to power the boat and make it to the shore" Admin ordered.

The Jacobs and Slaiyers all got aboard the boats with their teams and found electrical bagpipes and kilts.

"Bagpipe Hero?" Reu read.  
"Can I just row this instead?"  
"No!" Admin answered.

Ding!

"See now you can do something with those bagpipes!" Admin yelled.  
"Bagpipes? Kilts? We must be in Scotland" J exclaimed.  
"Yes ok J we get it your gimmick is that you're good with geography you can connect bagpipes to Scotland holy shit amazing" Admin yelled.  
"oh..." J said.  
"I play the trombone back in band. Should be cake" Gingerale shrugged.  
"Every right note struck will move the boat a bit, so playing right consecutively will obviously make you go fast" Admin explained.  
"SANIC" Carz screamed.  
"I don't know guys I've never even touched a bagpipe before..." Grenada confessed.  
"Oh come on all bagpipe songs are practically the same how hard can it be" Kirby shrugged.

[Song #6 - Education]  
To the tune of Cock of the North  
The haikuers play the corresponding pipes as they show on the screen hooked up to the boats.  
Marrowsky: Ooooooh, Shinxy dude, tell me man. What's up with your education?  
Pseudonym: You need to read, or do some math. Just have some dedication.  
Joe: A's for Apple, and banana has B  
Shinxy: C's for cock-  
Kirby: O' the North, matey!  
Nicholas: E's for eggs, now come on Shinxy, what comes after E?  
Element: I basically wrote, the constitution  
Mr. Moogle: China built a wall  
Blooberri: America declared independence  
Sunnia: In 1776  
Reu: Religion and science, art and literature  
Berserker: Mythology and more  
Marrowsky: It's basic logic, tell me Shinxy, what comes after E?  
Troll Slaiyers: From countries of the world to the planets of the universe  
From theories of reality to knowing your verse  
You don't need to know everything, just the gist of really anything, but know your ABCs of course  
Team Jacob: From countries of the world to the planets of the universe  
From theories of reality to knowing your verse  
You don't need to know everything, just the gist of really anything, but know your ABCs of course  
Robot: Planck founded, quantum physics  
J: Scotland's part of the U.K.  
Alice: Do you know your seven seas  
Rydli: Or can you name a Broadway play?  
Pantz: Shinxy dude, tell me man. What's up with your education?  
Marrowsky: Come on Shinxy, it's pretty easy, what comes after E~  
The other haikuers joined in to sing the final note.  
[le big finish]

":fsad:" Shinxy said.  
"Close enough" Marrowsky shrugged.

Both team's boats reached the shore and the haikuers started to drop their bagpipes and climb out.

"Welcome to Loch Ness" Admin greeted them all as he stood at the shore.  
"Up here you can see Urquhart Castle" Admin continued.  
"Loch Ness? The home of the Loch Ness Monster..." Berserker exclaimed quietly.  
"Whoa, Nessie, eh? More like Nessie Joe, amiright? Because that's my nickname. Nessie Joe. And the Loch Ness Monster is nicknamed Nessie. This should mean good luck for our team" Joe laughed, making Berserker roll his eyes.  
"Dude don't jinx us" Pantz complained.  
"Loch Ness. Ness. Earthbound. TESSIE!" Alice exclaimed.

[Alice in le confession toilet]  
"The Mother series is only my favorite series ever, it's...it's beautiful, man..."  
Alice's ass was vacuumed.  
[le end]

"Has anyone seen Ziggy?" Bless asked.  
"Hey no one cares" Cloud replied.  
"I can now say I miss Ziggy unironically..." Bless sighed.  
"Ok but how is that ironic?" Element asked.  
"Because..." Bless said.  
"Because what?"  
"I'm not answering to be ironic"  
"Really hating Bless right now. But oh well, Luke wasn't that bad of a teammate to lose. He was pretty useless in challenges" Cloud admitted.  
"Admin, what's the next challenge?" Grenade asked.  
"Today's challenge will be one, long collaborative exhibition. We're gonna be playing...golf! First played in 15th century Scotland, golf has become an iconic sport of the country, now played by the likes of even Mario, and will be featured in the Rio Olympic Games next year" Admin explained.  
"Whoa cool we should go there" Joe suggested.  
"We've already been there, Joe." Admin said.  
"It was literally the last place we visited" Element said.  
"Ok Element we get it, you got some sick memorization skills to know that, now let Admin continue talking" Nicholas said.  
"We'll be playing 18 holes" Admin continued.  
"One for each hole and then one goes again for the Jacobs, nicely planned" Rydli complimented.  
"Oh. I was going to have you guys switch with each swing but that sounds better. One for each hole it is. Jacobs decide on one player to go a second time. Now, you'll be going in alphabetical order" Admin explained.

The haikuers looked at their opponents as Admin announced the matchups.

"Hole 1: Alice Vs. Bless  
Hole 2: Berserker Vs. Carz  
Hole 3: Blooberri Vs. Cloud  
Hole 4: GingeraleDragon  
Hole 5: Isaac Vs. DryBones  
Hole 6: J Vs. Eden  
Hole 7: Lemon Vs. Element  
Hole 8: Lukeguy Vs. Grenade  
Hole 9: Mike Vs. Joe  
Hole 10: Nicholas Vs. Jp  
Hole 11: Reu Vs. Kirby  
Hole 12: Riley Vs. Marrowsky  
Hole 13: Robot Vs. Mr. Moogle  
Hole 14: Sam Vs. Pantz  
Hole 15: StarForce Vs. Pseudonym  
Hole 16: Stickboy Vs. Rydli  
Hole 17: Sunnia Vs. Shinxy  
Hole 18: ? Vs. Ziggy"

"Hole hole hole hole hole grounded grounded grounded grounded grounded grounded grounded grounded" Carz said.  
"Yo Admin, wouldn't Madorky and Gluvr be in a different position? If you're going by their sjw names wouldn't everyone else have to too?" Gingerale asked.  
"Gluvr signed up for HDWT as Kirby and when was the last time Alice has actually made her username Madorky?" Admin asked.  
"There weren't any sign ups we just showed up and you all threw us on your plane like a rapist or something" Gingerale reminded him.  
"Just shut up and go with it" Admin groaned.

"So I'm gonna be against Robot, Great Scottland that's a coincidence considering our dumb underdeveloped subplot" Mr. Moogle exclaimed.  
"Did someone mention my name?" Scott Cawthon asked with a smile as he walked into view.

Gingerale and Element among others groaned.

"No Scott Cawthon nobody bloody asked for you" Element said.  
"Oh, really I was just walking around and y'know thought I heard someone call my name..." Scott Cawthon said calmly.  
"You're trying to get on the show so we can make fun of you, aren't you?" Gingerale arched a brow.  
"What? N-noo! Noo! I would never, I was just, y'know, around, and thought-"  
"Give it up Scott were better than that, we aren't giving you a dumb Five Nights at Freddy's spoof" Cloud crossed his arms.  
"I donate to charity!" Scott defended himself.  
"Just get out of here!" Gingerale shooed, smacking Scott Cawthon with a broom.

"Wait a minute...Scotland...onions...SHRAK" Berserker screamed.  
"Wait a minute...Scotland...onions...SHRAK" Alice repeated.  
"Wait a minute...Scotland...onions...SHRAK" Luke repeated.  
"Wait a minute...Scotland...onions...SHRAK" Mike repeated.  
"Oh yeah, Mike, can I speak with you for a moment..." Imboo said, tugging his shirt.  
"shit" Mile quietly whispered.

Imboo and Mike walked a bit away from the group. Imboo took a deep breath before giving Mike the news.

"Mike, Kanga got the results back. They ran positive. You're a normie."

"No. No..." Mike said quietly.  
"It says here you have a job, own a car, have no specific fetish, own an apple product, and play video games on a console. Face it Mike, you're a normalfag. Now get the fuck of my board" Imboo said.

As Imboo walked away Mike looked up into the sky and screamed.

"I'M A NORMALFAG!"

Meanwhile the teams were getting ready for their golf matches. Alice and Bless were the first up.

"I won't mess this up...not to BLESS" Alice declared.  
"Is Bless really that bad?" LEMON asked.  
"Yes he is the plague of the haikuers" Alice replied.  
"Fu*k Bless, you unfunny ironic piece of trash" Nicholas agreed.  
"Can confirm: not funny." Gingerale nodded.  
"Thanks" Bless said, standing next to them all.  
"I think you're cool Bless" Lemon smiled.  
"Oh I see the Mexicans sticking out for each other, huh? Taco alliances? I wasn't aware Lemon was even here I thought he was dead. Anyways, back away Lem, Madorky needs her concentration. And if you stay too close to Bless you might catch the bird flu" Nicholas warned.  
"I...am hated..." Bless said quietly.  
"Alright contestants settle down. Alice you have the first shot" Admin announced.  
"Club me" Alice narrowed her eyes.

GingerLeDragon threw the golf club at Alice and it struck her head, knocking her down.

"Weakie got JV3d" Cloud said.

DaUser passed Bless a club.

"What kind of club is that?" Pseudonym asked.  
"Idk" Bless replied.  
"Hey Admin, what kind of club is that?" Pseudonym asked.  
"It doesn't matter Pseudo shut up" Admin said.  
"Actually, the type of club will affect the distance and power of the stricken golf ball" Rydli explained.  
"Good point Rydli" Jp agreed.  
"Ok nobody cares it's just gold nobody wants to go into the details just hit the ball and get things going" Admin said.  
"Right, but what if one team has a club that gives them an advantage?" Rydli asked.  
"Just shut up. Madorky, Bless. Go" Admin instructed.  
"We are starting at the foot of Urquhart Castle."

Alice eyed the hole, 200 feet away.  
She narrowed her eyes and lifted her club, ready to smeck it, but was interrupted by Bless striking it himself.

"Bless dude it was Madorky's turn" Admin said.  
"Sorry I was being ironic"

The ball traveled 10 feet forward.  
Alice went to retrieve the ball to start over but Amdin stopped her.

"Nope. That counted. Now it's Bless' turn." Admin deemed.  
"What the heck?! Bullshit!" Alice complained, trying to bend her club but couldn't because she was the opposite of swoll. Weak is also an applicable term.

Bless readied his club and knocked his ball into the water.

"Bless what the fuck" Cloud complained.  
"Sorry I was being ironic"

Alice whacked her golf ball and it traveled 150 feet, 40 ft from the hole.

Bless' ball was back at the starting place. He whacked it and it ricochet off the air and smacked Alice's face, who fell down.

"Really Madorky now's not the time to be sleeping" Bless said.

Alice got up and shook off her angry expression. She got to her ball and carefully practiced her swing three times, brushing the grass next to the golf ball. She then hit the ball and it traveled in a straight path to the hole.

"Bogey" Admin yelled.  
"Anyone keeping score? Oh well just get one of the interns to do it. Parascout!" Admin yelled.

Parascout came running out, holding a scorecard in his hand.

"Haha you got it dude, +1 for Team Jacob. Nice job writing this down, huh? Such a good guy. Considering getting me on the show by any chance? I mean I do recall a new character will be added eventually?" Parascout asked, quickly jabbing down notes for some reason even though all he had to write down was a plus sign and one number.  
"No, Parascout." Admin groaned.  
"Haha yeah just keeping these cameos up building up my fanbase right?" Parascout asked.  
"Get the camera off of us go back to the game" Admin ordered.

"This club...is so nice feeling...this would be a good tool for beating up my wife" Bless said.

Bless aimlessly whacked the ball and it flew in the air, landing directly in the hole.

"Bogey" Admin announced.  
"Wtf Bless tied it up? That's so unexpected coming from someone we have grown to expect to mess things up! It's almost...almost...like a meme" Joe said.  
"Tat was sew boooooooring, this challenge is so vooooooring ;^;" Shinxy whined.  
"You have the attention span of a monkey all you had to do was stand here and wait for one minute. At this rate we can see ourselves being done for the day in twenty minutes." Pseudonym replied.  
":CCCCCC" Shinxy said.  
"You okay Shinxy?" Marrowsky asked.  
"hddhdjdjsjs" Shinxy muttered quietly.

[Marrowksy in le confession toilet]  
"Shinxy might not be the most...engaging in conversations"  
[le end]

"Berserker, Carz. You two are up." Admin announced.

Alice walked by Berserker and handed him her club.

"Good luck out there Berk" Alice smiled.  
"Shrek" Berk repelled.

[Alice in le confession toilet]  
"Me and Berserker are like, uh. Nothing. We don't have a relationship. But he seems like a cool guy, I'm sure nothing will alter my opinion of him in the future.  
[le end]

Bless walked by Carz, who grabbed the club and started shoving it in his mouth.

"No, Carz! No!" Bless said, smacking him and trying to pull the club out.  
"FUCK YOU!" Carz screamed, whacking Bless with the golf club and shoving it up his ass.

Carz ripped his pants off before joining Berserker at the first hole, the starting place of the second hole.

"Two cancers up against each other" Lukeguy noted quietly.  
"You can do it Carz!" Kirby encouraged, jumping up and down.  
"I HATE MINIONS!" Carz screamed at the top of his lungs.  
"MINIONS!"  
"MINIONS!"  
"Minions!"  
"Minions"  
"minions"  
"minions..." the sound echoed in the sky's.

"Did you hear something?" Queen Elizabeth asked as she sipped some tea.  
"No, what was it?" Prince Philip asked.  
"I'm not sure...I think it was something called...minions..." Queen Elizabeth said, looking at a banana.

"So Berserker got a birdie, Carz got an Eagle" Admin announced, and Parascout wrote -1 next to Team Jacob hole 2 and -2 next to Troll Slaiyers hole 2.  
"Hey wait I'm not even good enough to be one of the characters that gets screentime while they're playing?" Berserker asked.  
"Was that a fourth wall joke?" Blooberri asked.  
"No the cameraman just told me I'm not good enough to be one of the characters that gets screentime while they're playing so they are going to cut my scene for time" Berserker said.  
"I think you did good Berserker" Blooberri smiled.  
"Thanks." Berserker replied flatly, passing his club to her.  
"hi" Carz said to Blooberri.  
"Oh hey Carz" Blooberri smiled.  
"Yo Carz. Bro. Club me." Cloud whistled.

Carz tossed the club to Cloud who dropped it immediately because his arm was so weak.

"You ok there pal?" Rydli asked.  
"Yeah I'm fine Rydli I just dro-"  
"Y'know I work out and I'm good at math" Rydli reminded him.  
"Ok" Cloud responded.  
"Just a tip. It's all in the knees" Rydli winked.

Cloud walked up to the second hole where Blooberri was standing.

"Sup" Blooberri greeted.  
"Yeah" Cloud said.  
"Good luck" Bloo said.  
"Hole 3: staring at Invermoriston, you'll be traveling be ball across the Thomas Telford bridge." Admin explained.  
"Invermorwhat?" Cloud asked.  
"Moranatsu?" J asked.

Gingerale sighed heavily.

"J we get it you like yiff games" he said.

Blooberri swing her club and the ball rolled onto and across the bridge.  
Cloud did the same, his ball touching hers bringing the balls together.  
Bloo whacked her ball and it traveled some more, landing right next to the hole.  
Cloud narrowed his eyes and heard a whisper in his head.

"It's all in the knees" Rydli's voice whispered as he did leg stretches.  
"Knees...knees...falcon KNEE SACRED COMBO" Cloud shouted.

Cloud threw his club and shorthopped into a knee to the ball where it flew in the air and he flipped around and did a reverse falcon punch and the ball landed in the hole.

"What the-whixha- what. Ah...what? How is that even remotely bloody possible?" Element asked.

Blooberri tipped her ball and it sinked into the hole.

"Birdie for Cloud, par for Bloo" Admin told Parascout.  
"That makes -2 for Troll Slaiyers, 0 for Team Jacob" Parascout counted.  
"Birdie? Where :o" Shinxy asked.

GingeraleDragon and Dausername lined up at the hole, clubs in hand.  
Gingerale carefully struck his ball, making it quickly travel across the ground with the hole sitting several yard behind its halt.  
DaUser shrugged, looked at the hole, and hit the ball where it flew across the air and landed directly in the hole, making Gingerale's jaw drop.

"And a hole-in-one from DaUser! Nice one!" Admin complimented.  
"Great job DaUser!" Kirby yelled.

[DatUsername in le confession toilet]  
"You play a lot of Wii Sports, you learn a thing or two"  
[le end]

[GingeraleDragon in le confession toilet]  
"Minor downlifter...if that's a thing. It's a thing now. But I still got this, the support of my teammates will let me sink this in on my next hit"  
[le end]

"Ok Gingerale now that you've traveled all the way back to the plane just to make that confessional and then back, I hope you're ready to make your move" Admin said.

Gingerale readied his club, swinging at the air a few times.

"Don't screw this up you asshole" Nicholas said.  
"Thanks Nicholas"  
"Don't thank me concentrate on the game"

Gingerale practiced his swing a few more times before being interrupted by his phone ringing. He tried to ignore it but it kept ringing and ringing before he caved in and answered it.

"What!?" he asked angrily.  
"Did you wash your vagina?" Mama Gingerale asked.  
"I'm a fucking dude mom I don't have a vagina" Gingerale snapped.  
"Don't use that tone with me mister you sound like a raging pussy to me right now so shut the fuck up and watch your language" she screamed.  
"SHUT UP MOM I'M BUSY" he screamed back, hanging up the phone.

He hit the ball and it flew into the hole but then popped back out. Angered, he threw the club at the ground and it reflected off and smacked him in the face, making him fall on the ground. The ground shook a bit and the golf ball fell into the hole.

"-2 DaUser -1 GingeraleDragon" Admin announced.

DryBones walked up and picked his club up, ready to get 'em.

"You know how to play, right?" Mr. Moogle asked.  
"I'm not an idiot" DryBones rolled his eyes.

"The next hole will be across the  
Drumnadrochit village, approximately 500 feet away." Admin announced.

Isaac walked up, doing some stretches to get ready. She threw the club in the air and quickly snagged it like a cool person because it looks cool like that. She tipped the ball and as it rolled it was stopped by someone's foot. Standing tall, it was Flameflare.

"Flameflare!?" StarForce gasped.  
"Holy balls! Who is that again?" Kirby asked.  
"Naomi's sister." Lukeguy answered.  
"Actually I'm a boy now. Call me Japser please" Jasper asked.  
"What are you doing here, Jasper?" Isaac asked.  
"Wait so you two both just happened to feel yourselves as the opposite sex and there wasn't any outside influence on this whatsoever..." Lukeguy asked.  
"Luke don't me dumb" Alice said, bumping her elbow into his chest.  
"Look I'd prefer if we just not talk about this. Let's talk about something else. That isn't this. This isn't a very comfortable conversation. Let's move on. So we don't have to talk about this. Because I don't want to" Jasper said.

Lukeguy folded his arms and rolled his eyes.

"Flameflare...so you survived. But how do we know you won't pull something on us again?" Reu asked.  
"So, who's this Flameflare? Wasn't here, still learning names" Riley said.  
"Shut up Riley we've all seen HDA, we all very well know Jillian and what she did." Nicholas said.  
"Jillian is fine if you want but I prefer to be called a boy, please. And I didn't mean to cause so much trouble, I only wanted to kill Kermit, I didn't know it would-"  
"Hey. I'm Admin. Host of the show. We're running on a half hour schedule here, at least compete in the challenge as you talk to keep things going" Admin ordered.

DryBones putted his ball as Isaac asked again,

"So, again, what are you doing here?" Isaac asked.  
"I heard there was another season and wanted to be on it. I flew to Scotland and stayed at this hotel, waiting for the plane to arrive" Jasper explained.

Isaac putted his ball.

"Wow. That's such a retarded story" Cloud said.  
"It's better than 'I just happened to be in the area'" Mr. Moogle shrugged.  
"I can attest Luna's stepdad actually really was in the area." Marrowsky said.

DryBones putted the ball again and it landed in the hole. Isaac did the same.

TryHardBones passed his club to Eden, and Isaac to J.

"I got this" Eden smiled to her team.  
"Marrowsky..." J blushed.  
"J focus on the game" Gingerale shouted from right behind him.  
"Did you say focus on the balls?" J blushed.  
"No I didn't. I said literally the game just so you wouldn't make that misconception." Gingerale said.

J smelled the ball and it flew down the street.  
Eden did the same but with a smeck.

"So, uh. How's it been?" Isaac asked.  
"Fine." Jasper replied.  
"Do you know what fine really means? It means f'd up, insecure, neurotic, and emotional" Isaac noted.  
"Ok" Jasper said.

At Abriachan, Lemon was against Element.

[Lemon in le confession toilet]  
"Golf's a pretty cool sport. I know someone from school who is on the golf team. Or...was, got cut. How do you manage to get cut from the golf team? Not show up I guess"  
[le end]

"Good luck, 'ol sport" Lemon said nicely.  
"Same to you, uh, um. Sorry I don't know any good British words" Element shrug emoted.

Lemon made the hole in two shots. Element made it four shots.

"AAAAAAAH FUCK THIS GAME IT'S RIGGED" Element snapped, throwing the club at Grenade, whacking him in the ballsack.

Lukeguy stepped up next and Grenade crawled over.

"This should be an easy win for, but good luck anyways Grenade!" Joe cheered.  
"Yes, thanks for announcing that this will be an easy win for us, I'm sure that won't have consequences in any way" Grenade said as he got up.

Lukeguy examined the coast and tried to calculate the power of his club. He felt the soft air blow on his shirt and bent his knees. He practiced his swing a few times before striking the golf ball. It lifted into the air and flew across the field, falling from the sky and landing directly in the hole. Everyone's jaw dropped.

"What the..." Gingerale scratched his head.  
"Well played" Reu nodded.

[Lukeguy in le confession toilet]  
"Golf is a game that's all about concentration and using your mind. A favorite of mine, I play, yes, I do"  
[le end]

"Wow that's kind of ironic" Mr. Moogle said.  
"What ever do you mean, Moogle?" Cloud asked without expression.  
"Well, I mean. You said Lukeguy wasn't useful, and then he got switched to the other team. The very next challenge happened to rely on the skill of a sport he is used to." Mr. Moogle explained.  
"Hmm, I fail to see the irony in that one" Cloud said.

"You got this Grenade?" Bless asked.  
"Well anything that isn't a hole-in-one will make me look bad, so no, not really Bless." Grenade replied with a touch of sass.

Grenade swung and the ball flew across the field.  
He walked up and putted it again, making it in on his second stroke.

The next hole was at Dores.

"Ziggy still hasn't reappeared..." Bless said nervously.  
"As long as he shows up in time for his hole, he's still in the game" Admin said.  
"Speaking of missing people, where is My Main Man Mike?" Nicholas asked.

The crowd of haikuers looked around, then split into two smaller groups as they moved away from each other, revealing a young man with a tucked in collard white shirt with a pencil in its pocket, a black tie, some square glasses, and khakis.

"Hi all, how's the game going?" Mike asked with a smile.  
"Mike...you look...like a nerd..." Nicholas said in distaste.

Mike laughed before brushing off his comment.

"Ha ha ha, please, call me Michael!" Michael pleaded.  
"No pressure, though. Just taking things one day at a time. See the game last night, we played a-ok if I do say so myself" Michael continued.  
"Mike...what the heck happened to you my man?" Alice asked.  
"Just living a normal life, my friend. Now did we come here to yipper yapper or play some golf!?" Michael laughed, grabbing the club and striking the ball with precision.

The ball moved 153 feet.

"I sure love golf, almost as much as I love bread" Michael said as he took a deep breath of the fresh air and took some bread out of his pocket to snack on.  
"Uh. Whatever, man lol. I always knew Nicholas was the main source for some hip dank ironic maymays HAHA SNORT oops I said snort out loud. But that's just me ^_^! Right Nicholas? Nicholas?" Joe asked, looking at Nicholas, but his eyes were too full of concern that distracted him.

Joe sighed and hit the ball as hard as she could, knocking it into Mike's ball and helping his land in the hole.

"Nice one, friend! Mind if I send you a friend request on MySpace for that generous deed? Haha, I kid, I kid. I'm aware MySpace is outdated and Facebook is the current mainstream social media replacement, I was just referring to it as a joke." Michael smiled, giving Joe a firm handshake.  
"Right...guess that means Mike's will just count as a hole-in one" Admin declared.  
Joe's jaw dropped, she hit the ball angrily and it flew right past the hole.

"Whoa, Joe, take it easy. You don't want to-" Pseudonym began.

Joe angrily hit the ball again and again, missing the hole every time before it sank in on the fifth try.

"That..." Pseudonym finished.

[Joe in le confession toilet]  
"I didn't mean to get so frustrated...Nicholas being distracted just distracted me...he's such a piece of shit I want his balls"  
[le end]

"Land it here, buckaroo" Michael said, passing Nicholas the golf club as he clicked his tongue.  
"Joe passed her club to Jp, the next J.

"Hey" Jp greeted.  
"Yeah yeah generic fodder let's get this over with" Nicholas said, bending his knee and practicing his swing.  
"Uh, excuse me?" Jp asked.  
Nicholas hit the ball, it rolled up the small hill and down the next, up and down.

Jp and Nicholas went back and forth putting across the hilly area, Nicholas made it in three swings. Jp finally made it in.

"And what do you call ten minus six?" Nicholas asked.

"Four!" Imboo announced Jp's score.

"Ha. It's funny because they say that in golf. I like it." Lemon stated.

Reu and Kirby were up next.  
The concentrated hard and Kirby had a happy look on their face. They continued to put their balls as it traveled under a windmill.  
Reu made a birdie, Kirby got a bogey.

"Good job Reu, you did nice" Kirby complimented.  
"Yeah, thanks." Reu replied, looking down and thinking of something else.

At Inverfarigaig, Riley was against Marrowsky.

"Wish me luck, Shadow" Riley said as he put his plushie on the ground and grabbed his club.  
"No I hope you lose get voted off and die" Shadow snared.  
"I should have brought my waifu pillow" Riley sighed.  
"You doing ok, buddy?" Marrowsky asked.

Luke groaned as he watched Riley, who looked down sadly. Alice watched the two's expressions and sighed.

"Good luck Riley" Alice said supportively, raising Riley's confidence a bit.

The two hit the balls over a small bridge with many holes in it  
Riley made a double bogey, Marrowsky made it on par.

"Good job Marrowsky~" J yelled.  
"and Riley yeah!" Riley quietly cheered for himself.

Bless looked for any sign of Ziggy and sighed, Isaac and Jasper continued to reconcile, Nicholas watched Michael talk about work.

Robot and Mr. Moogle were up against each other.

"How's the team?" Mr. Moogle asked to break some ice.  
"Fine" Robot answered.  
Robot did some calculations and whacked the golf ball, sinking it on the first hit.

"Oh.." Mr. Moogle said.

Moogle struck the ball and it rolled off a ramp, flying over a ravine and on a path of grass on the other side. He made the hole on the second swing.

At the river of Foyers, the next hole was near one of the waterfalls. They had to knock if off the cliff.

"Hey" Pantz smiled, readying her swing.  
"Yo bitch watch a man sink this hole like my dick in a vag" said Sam.

[Sam in le confession toilet]  
"Sports? Awesome at them. I'M GONNA KICK SO MUCH AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAS"  
[le end]

Sam roared before swinging his club, the ball landing in a tree and falling into the river.

"Blimey" Pantz said, striking hers.

The golf ball fell off the cliff and landed safely on the grassy ground.

"That form, that smile, so perfect..." Luke said quietly to himself.  
"Pantz..." Joe said blushingly with hearts in her eyes.

Sam tried another swing but the same thing happened.  
Pantz made the hole on her third stroke, earning a par.  
Sam snapped his club in half, throwing the ball with his bare hands, earning him a double bogey.

"Thanks Sam" Stickboy said as he picked up the club.  
"I believe it's your turn" he said as he passed it to StarForce.

StarForce and Pseudonym stepped up for their swings.

"Ahh I think I got a splinter" StarForce said, swinging his hand and licking his finger.  
"It's a metal club" Pseudo said.  
"Uhh good luck out there, you. Opponent. You." StarForce said nervously as he held his broken club.  
"Same to you" Pseudo replied.

StarForce knocked the ball and it rolled under the log in front of them.  
Pseudonym did the same on his turn. They went back and forth until StarForce made it on swing 8 and Pseudonym made it swing 5.

Stickboy was snoring, napping on some golf club bags.

"It's your turn" Gingerale said, poking him with a club.  
"Huh, what? Uh, k" Sitckboy wiped his eyes, getting to his feet.

Stickboy and Rydli were at hole 16

"Ah, Wade Bridge. Such a privilege to be at a historical site, don't you agree, Sitckboy?" Rydli asked.  
"Hm? Yeah, sure" Stickboy agreed, looking at Jp, which didn't go unnoticed by Rydli.  
"Good luck" Rydli smiled, shaking Stick's hand.

Stickboy made the hole on par, Rydli made an eagle. Yes, he used his knees.

"Hey yeah I don't know what those terms mean. Is that good, or bad...?" Grenade asked.  
"Yes, eagle is good. Two under par" Admin said.  
"So with two holes left, Sunnia, Shinxy, and Ziggy will be our final three players, the fourth, any Jacob who volunteers to. To catch everyone up, Team Jacob is at -2, Troll Slaiyes you're at 0." Admin announced.  
"Down by two..." Mr. Moogle scratched his chin.  
"Marrooksu, dude. You gotta talk to Shinxy about this. We can't afford another screw up, and you seem to be friends with him" Jp said.  
"Hmm" Marrowsky thought, looking over at Shinxy, hiding in the shade of a tree.

Berserker walked away from the groups, disappearing from the scene.

"Marrowsky? He can't communicate with Shinxy, he's too Canadian. All his brain is think of is meese French horns and maple syrup" Cloud said.  
"Hey there buddy let's not be prejudiced" Marrowsky replied.  
"What? I can't understand you! All this 'oh look at me I'm Canadian eh eh eh fart noises eh eh eh I'm Marrowsky'" Cloud imitated.

Marrowsky stood silent and just walked away to talk to Shinxy.

"I'm gonna kick Cloud's anus if he makes fun of Marrowsky again..." J snarled.  
"J shut up about Marrowsky, go play with yourself in the forest or something" Gingerale said.  
"What am I supposed to do there?"  
"I don't know find a unicorn or something just scat"  
"Don't you mean scrat?"  
"What? Scat means leave, what were you thinking of? Never mind just go"

"Hey, Shinxy. It's your turn, you should go get ready. We're losing, so it's important you don't do too poorly" Marrowsky said.  
"ehhhdhhdh" Shinxy mumbled.  
"Me too. Now let's get going" Marrowsky said, lending his hand out.  
"ahhdhh" Shinxy mumbled, not moving.  
"Shinxy get up you have to participate in the challenge" Marrowsky commanded.  
"djsjsjsj djsjsjsj" Shinxy mumbled, sinking down.

Marrowksy sighed and picked Shinxy up, carrying all the way to the small village of Fort Augustus, where their next hole was.

"The Caledonian Canal, over 60 miles and 10 bridges. We're making it easy on you so the hole is only across three bridges." Admin announced.

Marrowksy out Shinxy down and was shocked to see he was sweating immensely and looked pale white.

"Shinxy, what happened?" Marrowksy asked.  
"Too...much sun...not used to this...exposure..." Shinxy gasped.  
"Was this not a problem in freakin' Egypt?" Mr. Moogle asked.

Sunnia was standing wth her club ready. Shinxy was dying a few feet away.

"Shinxy, you need to play" Marrowsky insisted.  
"no" Shinxy replied.  
"Come on Shinxy you're gonna get voted off if you don't"  
"ehhh"  
"Shinxy it's not even that hard you just hit the ball and walk to it to hit again"  
"Not that hard? Golf is a game that requires intellect-" Luke began.  
"Shut up" Marrowsky interrupted.  
"r00d" Shinxy said.  
"Would a tl;dr post be more appropriate? But whatever, Shinxy get up" Marrowsky poked Shinxy with the club.  
"nnnnnnn" Shinxy mumbled.  
"Blimey that boy ain't right" Jasper exclaimed in an attempted Scottish accent.  
"Oh you're doing accents now" Stickboy said.  
"Crack er doser in me tummy, lad" Jasper responded.  
"Uh...right" Stickboy said.

Alice farted.

"Better out than in I always say" she said.

Shinxy wouldn't budge, continuing to lay on the ground.

"Come on Shinxy tch tch tch" Marrowsky said as he tried to get his attention.  
"eh" he mumbled quietly.  
"Shinxy you're about as obedient as a cat" Marrowsky sighed.  
"Oh I see what's going on here. You're trying to steal my spot, huh Marrowsky?" Nicholas asked, stuffing his finger into his chest.  
"What Do You Mean?" Marrowsky asked.  
"You're stealing thins I've said from the Skype chat. First with the ABCs learning formula and now you ripped a line straight from the Grovyle's asshole. I see how it is, Mr. Bigshot. Well Shinxy's MY friend!" Nicholas snarled.  
"Fellas, FELLAS!" StarForce screamed, pushing the two apart.  
"I think I can give some input and say Nicholas is a better teammate than Marrowsky" StarForce said.  
"You've never been on my team" Marrowsky replied.  
"Hold on guys StarForce is saying something that supports a side I'm on so I have to star this post even if his reasoning is bullshit" Element said.  
"Alright gang, that's enough social commentary for one day, let's focus back on the game!" Michael insisted.  
"YOU ARE NOT MIKE!" Nicholas snapped, taking a club and swinging it for Mike's head, but it instead whacked Shinxy who was just getting up.

Shinxy fell on the golf ball and it rolled across the ground.  
Ziggy, fully drenched in water, ran into the scene.

"Ebin" he greeted before tripping some balls (tripping on the ball) and knocking himself into Mike.

Sunnia whistled as the chaos ensued and calmly hit her ball.  
The teams continued to bicker about retarded things.

"We should vote off Marrowsky when we lose lol" Joe proposed.  
"Fair enough" Grenade agreed..  
"Sure" Bless agreed..  
"I'm not sure why but I want to be part of the popular consensus" Kirby agreed.  
"This decision makes 0 sense" Rydli said.

Shinxy looked at the ball in front of him and then back at Marrowsky, and got to his feet. He picked up his club and eyes the field, swinging with power. The ball flew across the first bridge, surpassing Sunnia's ball.  
Sunnia struck again and Shinxy determinedly whacked it with all his power, it flew past two bridges and sinked into the hole. Sunnia's jaw dropped, it took her two more shots to make it, bringing Team Jacob to -1 and Troll Slaiyers to -1.

"What the! Shinxy tied it up!" Bless said.  
"Wow" Mr. Moogle said.  
"So that means the final hole will truly determine the ultimate winner" Admin said.  
"Yes it would have done that regardless" Pseudonym replied.  
"Team Jacob, who do you want to challenge Ziggy?" Admin asked.  
"So what are we doing? Bork challenge? Jest?" Ziggy asked.

"Robot" Nicholas said.  
"Luke" Alice said.  
"Robot" Gingerale said.  
"Luke could have his chance to shine" Lemon said.  
"Just because you play golf doesn't mean you're good at golf, if you make Vaporwave is it automatically good? No." Nicholas explained.  
"Just let Luke do it" Robot said.  
"No..." Luke said.

Meanwhile Berserker was looking over the Scotland seas with a camera.

"Hey, what are you doing here?" Joe asked with a smile as she walked up.  
"Nothing." Berserker replied, shunning her.  
"Are you trying to see the Nessie? Ooo can I watch?" Joe asked.  
"I'd prefer to watch alone. We're on different teams." He reminded her.  
"Look, that looks like it!" Joe pointed excitedly.  
"That's driftwood. You can't just expect to see the Loch Ness Monster so easily, look at how few convincing photos have appeared over the years." Berserker sighed.

Berserker continued to look over the seas.

"Look, over there!" Joe screamed.  
"That's a duck." Berserker told her.  
"Look!"  
"That's your own shadow."

Joe sighed.

"Maybe if you sacrifice yourself to the water it will appear" Berserker suggested sarcastically.  
"Hey that's a good idea, I do have NessieJoe a smh nickname after all lmao" Joe laughed, running and leaping into the ocean.  
"Good" Berserker said to himself, continuing to look around the waters.

Suddenly, the water started rippling. The ripple got bigger until something emerged. A long neck rose out of the water, and the Loch Ness Monster looked into Berserker's eyes. Joe was sitting on the top of its head.

"What the.." Berserker said.  
"Found him" Joe exclaimed, before it threw her off.

Berserker ran closer to the water, standing at the edge of the shore.

"This is great, like bagels" Berserker said, snapping a picture.

The Loch Ness Monster roared at the flash and swam aggressively closer to Berserker and Joe. They backed up as it stopped moving, snarling at them.

"Guess if can't walk on land, haha pleb" Joe pointed and laughed.

Another creature pooped its head out of the water, this time it was a orange, Yoshi-like aquatic creature with a red bandana.

"Plessie?" Berserker asked.

Plessie roared in a retard voice and swam toward them, getting on the shore and running after them.

"Aw, I think he wants a hug" Joe smiled, extending her arms out.  
"I don't" Bersker said, running away.  
"Come here buddy~" Joe said as Plessie ran over her and stomped on her several times, beating her up mercilessly and whacking her off the ground like a toy.

The haikuers were all gathered at the 18th hole at Lochend.

"Cate. Brak. Suddenly ses" Ziggy said.  
"Ziggy, my man. Someone didn't sing during the song. I'm afraid we have no need for you to compete in the challenge, as you are hereby automatically eliminated." Admin bounced.

Many gasped except the ones too cool to gasp.

"Ziggy..." Bless whispered.

"Wtf I didn't know there was a song" Ziggy complained.  
"It's ok Ziggy, it's ok. I was only kidding, because you do have the opportunity to make it up! In another song!" Admin declared.  
"You said one song per episode" Element complained.  
"First of all, I didn't. Second, you don't need to sing. Only Ziggy does, unless you want to sing for some reason then I don't care." Admin explained.  
"Hmm...I can sing any song. This is good, I have so many favorites, my taste in music can give me the opportunity to pick out an easy tune or simply Ebin one, Eric" Ziggy said, feeling his chin.

"Justin Bieber - #1Day - What Do You Mean? Post your pic or video!" Bless said.  
"What" Ziggy responded.

The tune of What Do You Mean began starting up.

"What. No, I didn't want this. Pick something else, come on anything else. I'll even do something original. BLESS WHY THIS SONG" Ziggy yelled.  
"Sorry I was ironically shitposting" Bless explained.  
"Justin Bieber? Why!" Ziggy cried.  
"Really Ziggy Justin Birber jokes? Are you 12?" Mr. Moogle asked.  
"RUN!" Berserker screamed as he ran past the group.  
"Why?" Alice asked.  
"Probably some dumb Shrek joke" Lukeguy scoffed.  
"Hey now don't dishonor our almighty ogre, brogre" Cloud said.

The haikuers watched as Plessie was speeding towards them, sliding on its belly.

"What the heck!" Bless screamed and everyone ran away from the creature.  
"The golf carts!" Mr. Moogle said.  
"What? We had golf carts? I've been walking to each and every hole" Grenade said.

Reu and Lemon got into a cart.

"Go! Go!" Lemon pleaded nervously.  
"Uh, well, in Scotland the wheel is on the right side, so I'd have to drive..." Reu said.  
"Yes now go go we gotta get out of here!"  
"Right, but I only have a permit, so..."  
"It's a freakin golf cart who cares JUST SLAM IT" Lemon pleaded.

Plessie dove at them, but Reu slammed the pedal and sped away in time.

The haikuers were scattered in different golf carts, driving away from Plessie.

"Ziggy, we're waiting" Admin reminded him.  
"Wtf how long have you been in this cart?" Ziggy asked.  
"Hey, who cares. Just sing us boy" Pantz said.

[Song #7 - What Do You Mean?]  
Ziggy: What Do You mean? Oh, oh  
You're asking me this,  
But I don't even know  
What Do You Mean? Hey-ey  
I don't get the question,  
Or the pic or video  
What Do You Mean?  
Oh, What Do You Mean?  
Captioned it with #1Day, What Do You Mean?  
Oh, oh, oh, What Do You Mean?  
Hashtag or number, hey,  
What Do You Mean?

(Team Jacob all get on their boat thinking they are safe, but the Loch Ness Monster sees them and they swim away)

I log on to one day,  
I check my question page, and I see it  
I get a question, but I question what it say  
It makes no sense, the sender was an idiot

First you wanna go to the LEFT  
(The Jacobs boat steer to the left to avoid crashing)  
Then you wanna go to the RIGHT  
(They steer to the right to avoid Nessie catching them)  
Don't know in the day, don't know in the night  
Post a pic, or a video, but of what?  
Oh, I really want to know...

(Marrowsky takes a golf club and starts swinging balls at Plessie to repel)

What Do You mean? Oh, oh  
You're asking me this,  
But I don't even know  
What Do You Mean? Hey-ey  
I don't get the question,  
Or the pic or video  
What Do You Mean?  
Oh, What Do You Mean?  
Captioned it with #1Day, What Do You Mean?  
Oh, oh, oh, What Do You Mean?  
Hashtag or number, hey,  
What Do You Mean?

(Marrowsky, Shinxy, Cloud, and Bless reach a lighthouse and run up it)

What relevancy lies with Justin Bieber  
And what does #1day mean  
You ask me what I mean, but you're the asker  
You ask some quirky questions, this is the worst I've seen

(Nicholas and Michael jump out of the boat and swim to the shore)

First you wanna go to the LEFT  
(Ziggy, Pant, and Admin steer to the left to avoid Plessie catching them)  
Then you wanna go to the RIGHT  
(Kirby and DaUser steer to the right and fall off a cliff)  
Don't know in the day, don't know in the night  
Post a pic, or a video, but of what?  
Oh, I really want to know...

What Do You mean? Oh, oh  
You're asking me this,  
But I don't even know  
What Do You Mean? Hey-ey  
I don't get the question,  
Or the pic or video  
What Do You Mean?  
Oh, What Do You Mean?  
Captioned it with #1Day, What Do You Mean?  
Oh, oh, oh, What Do You Mean?  
Hashtag or number, hey,  
What Do You Mean?

Oh, oh

You're asking me this,  
But I don't even know  
What Do You Mean? Hey-ey

I don't get the question,  
Or the pic or video  
What Do You Mean?

Oh, What Do You Mean?  
Captioned it with #1Day, What Do You Mean?  
Oh, oh, oh, What Do You Mean?  
Hashtag or number, hey,  
What Do You Mean?"  
[le big finish]

"Well that's enough excitement for this guy, I think I'm gonna go home and watch some Greg's Anatomy" Michael said, walking away.  
"No. Mike, we need you for this" Nicholas said, grabbing his arm.  
"You...are the best Super Mario 3D World player here. Now if this show had good games for Crazy Event References like Team Fortress 2 I could be the chosen one, but we need you for this. We need...Mike..." Nicholas told him.  
"But...I have no time for video games, I need to focus on my life and work" Michael replied.

Nicholas slapped Michael and threw him in the ground, and started beating him up. Nicholas took Mike's iPhone.

"Are you a normie because of this?" Nicholas asked.  
"Well yes, owning an apple product is one of the-"

Nicholas threw the phone in the water.

"Do you feel any different?" Nicholas asked.  
"No..." Mike answered.  
"It's all in your head, fool! It's just a dumb bingo game people don't actually take those things seriously what are you a 13 year old girl? Now get out there and tame Plessie you freak" Nicholas said.  
"Yes...yass, yass, yush o3o [turns in2 a cat]" Mike said, standing up.

Mike ran off to find Plessie.

MEANWHILE, the rest of Team Jacob was speeding away from the Loch Ness Monster by playing their electrical bagpipes.

"Don't kill me, all my subscribers will be heartbroken! I'll never reach my dream of being YouTube famous!" Riley cried.  
"Shut up nerd" Gingerale said.  
"Hold on. In Kim Possible, there was a Scottish villain. So we can use golf balls to attack!" Blooberri said.

Alice snapped her finger.

"Yes!" she agreed.  
"Kim Possible is kinda hot, not gonna lie" Riley admitted, making Alice sigh.

As the boat past a shore, Alice noticed the hole was nearby.

"Hey! Luke, if you can go sink the hole we will win" Alice said.  
"I would say surviving is the real challenge here" StarForce said.  
"SHUT IT HAIKU DRAMA NOOOOOOB" Sam screamed.

Luke shrugged and jumped off the boat and onto the shore, golf club and ball in hand. He saw the small Lochend castle 100 meters away and started running for it.  
The rest of the balls were on the Jacob boat, where they used clubs to shoot them at the monster, but it just caught them in its mouth and shot back at them.

Cloud, Bless, Marrowsky, and Shinxy were at the top of the lighthouse. They looked down to see Plessie chasing the Slaiyers on land and Nessie chasing the Jacobs in the sea.  
Cloud saw Luke heading for the hole and then saw Ziggy driving nearby.

"Ziggy!" Cloud shouted.  
"Dude, you gotta make the hole before Pukedie!" he shouted.

Ziggy heard him and stopped the cart, he took the bag out from the back and got his club ready.  
Luke ran by them but Admin stopped him.

"Hold on, hold on. You want to sink this, you gotta do it right. Drop your balls, and smack them until they go in the hole." Admin ordered.

Ziggy and Luke sighed but let go of their balls, they fell to the ground.

"Knock it into the castle for the win" Admin said.

Jp and Eden were catching their breath when Plessie was jumping toward them.

"Look out!" Eden shouted.  
"What?" Jp asked.  
"You're gonna get hit!" Eden shouted.

Jp was about to turn around to see but Plessie was getting too close, so Eden whacked Jp's knee with a club and ducked. Jp fell and Plessie went over them, narrowly missing. Plessie stopped and got to its feet, turning around and ready to slam. But someone was waiting for him.

"Let me show you some strats" Mike said, jumping on him.

Plessie roared as Mike kicked his ass, guiding his slide. Plessie tried to knock Mile off and recklessly jumped about, accidentally slamming into the lighthouse, making it tip over and Marrowsky, Cloud, Shinxy and Bless fell to the ledge.  
Mike kept trying to control Plessie until they landed in the water, where Mike tried to guide it toward Loch Mess Monster.

Shinxy was holding onto the railing, Marrowsky and Bless holding onto his feet, and Cloud holding onto Marrowksy and Bless.

"Don't let go!" Cloud pleaded.  
"Ok" Shinxy said.

The lighthouse fell over and they all crashed onto the ground. The lighthouse landed near where Ziggy and Luke were, the ground shook and broke apart, starting to fall into the sea. Luke and Ziggy frantically hit their balls and followed them off the isolated block and back into the land, where they continued to put.

"Look out!" Stickboy screamed, all of Team Jacob jumped out of the boat except for Isaac and Jasper.

The boat crashed into the Loch Ness Monster just as Mike riding Plessie collide dad well. Isaac and Jasper grabbed onto Nessie's neck.

"We gotta jump" Jasper said.  
"I-I can't" Isaac said nervously, clinging onto Nessie's neck.

Plessie knocked its whole body into Nessie, pushing it back. Loch Ness Monster whacked Plessie with its neck. The two beasts were getting further and further from the shore.

"Okay l, truth or dare?" Jasper asked  
"What?"  
"I dare you to jump"  
"Well now I gotta do it" Isaac said, and they both jumped into the water as Plessie slammed right into the monster, pushing it down beneath the water.

"Victorious for lyfe!" Mike said.

The haikuers started to gather around Luke and Ziggy, neck to neck putting their balls closer to the castle as the ground caved in from the destruction below them.  
Mike rode Plessie up to the field.

"So you tamed it huh?" Gingerale asked.  
"Yep, converted to Satanism" Mike said, pointing to the pentagrams drawn all over Plessie's body.  
"Nice. Nice." Nicholas said.  
"S-s-s-ssss-sssss-ssssaatan" Plessie clapped.  
"Awww" everyone said.  
"Sssssaatan...sssssatan...orgy. Satanic...sacrifice. Orgyz. Sacrifice for Satan!" Plessie screamed, jumping on StarForce and fucking him.  
"Oppooooooh shifvvvv?" Bless said.

Plessie's eyes went bloodshot and it roared, jumping about and trying to rape everyone.

"Alright new plan. We kill Plessie." Nicholas said.  
"With what?" Reu asked as Plessie jumped at him, and he ran away.  
"Unicorns...Scotland's national animal...they're unicorns..." Jasper said, crawling to the area with Isaac and collapsing.  
"Alright, so do we know anyone who might be a brony?" Stickboy asked, and everyone looked at Moogle.  
"What does this have to do with anything? You think I have some kind of unicorn calling power? That's ridiculous...okay I'll do it" Moogle sighed.  
"Wait, don't help them" Jp warned.  
"It's for the benefit of both teams, you know, to not be forced into Orgying It Up" Nicholas said.  
"Ok guys I got this." Mr. Moogle said taking a deep breath.

"A true, true friend helps a friend in need. A friend will be there to help them see. A true, true friend helps a friend in need to see the light that shines from a true, true friend" Mr. Moogle sang.  
"tl;dr" Berserker replied.

Suddenly, the Tristar Unicorn came flying in and stabbed its horn into Plessie before running toward the screen. Plessie fell down and made one final emotional wave and roar before closing its eyes.

"Haven't seen that joke since 1968!" Mike said.

Luke made one final swing but the ball missed the castle by a few inches.

"Ooo, this is if. If Ziggy makes this, his team wins. But if he doesn't, Luke will win. Unless Luke somehow shoots backwards" Admin said.

Ziggy focused his aim and made one final swing, the ball flew down the path and everybody watched intensely. The ball started losing speed before the roll became slow and subtle, yards, feet, now inches from the castle entrance. Then it tapped Luke's ball, knocking it in.

"We did it!" cried StarForce, who was currently in anal pain.  
"Team Jacob wins once again!" Admin declared, and everyone cheered.  
"Fuck this!" Ziggy shouted, throwing his club on the ground only for it to fly back up and smack him in the eye.  
"That means Team-Without-a-Jacob is sending someone home" Admin added.  
"Neither team has a Jacob" Pseudonym reminded him.

Admin sprayed Pseudo with pepper spray.

"Hey, do I get to, you know, be on the show now?" Jasper asked.  
"Yeeeeeereeeaaaaaaaah no. But have fun. Here. Maybe you can hang out with whoever gets voted off" Admin said, patting his back.  
"Fair enough...well, good luck Isaac. I hope you win" Jasper said.  
"Of course you do. Because mom will make us share the stars." Isaac said.  
"No, I'd let you keep them all. But anyways, good luck. Live long and prosper. Also, if you see Kermit, tell him I'm sorry" Jasper requested.  
"Righto" Isaac nodded, and Jasper walked away, making Isaac sigh.

The haikuers were starting to get on the plane. When Alice stepped into it, Riley stopped her.

"Hey, Alice. I got you something" Riley said excitedly.

Riley pulled out a shirt form under his shirt. It was a black shirt with the Smash symbol on the front and the title Pufflyjigg printed on the back.

"Whoa, my tag. This is so awesome, Riley. Really, thanks man" Alice smiled.  
"Also here's $50. Happy Birthday" Riley said, handing her the cash money.  
"Oh ya" Alice celebrated, wiping the bill over her face and then ass.  
"Move over brogres I gotta take a fat ogre dump" Cloud said, getting on the plane and pushing past them.

The Troll Slaiyers were all at the elimination ceremony, sitting in three rows of six.

"The Troll Slaiyers, who have slaiyed 0 trolls so far, are tonight's losers, again! You've all voted, and after tonight only 17 will remain on this team, and the survivors will be one step closer to 1,000,000 stars. So when I call your name, come and get your can of Dew." Admin instructed.

[Marrowsky in le confession toilet]  
Marrowsky stamps somebody's passport.  
[le end]

[Rydli in le confession toilet]  
Rydli smiles and stamps somebody's passport.  
[le end]

[Bless in le confession toilet]  
Bless scratches his beard, wondering who to vote ironically for.  
[le end]

"The first Mountain Dew of the night goes to, Kirby" Admin announced.  
"Woo! Good luck everyone!" Kirby smiled as she received her can.

"Also safe tonight, Mr. Moogle and Element" Admin continued.  
"Sweet" Mr. Moogle said.  
"Yeah yeah let's get this over with I got some Street Fighter to play" Element added.

"Grenade, DryBones, Cloud, Bless" Admin continued.

Grenade smiled as he got his can.

"Yes!" DryBones pumped his fist.  
"Not surprising at all" Cloud said.  
"OK. Radiohead reference." Bless said.

"Eden, Shinxy" Admin continued.

"Cool" Eden said as she checked her watch and thought of an African child drying.  
"yiss~" Shinxy said, hugging Element.

"Marrowsky, Jp, Joe"

Marrowsky tightened his sunglasses and coach hat.  
Jp smiled.

"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa I am SO happy. Pantz we should celebrate by banging tonight" Joe suggested.  
"I didn't get my Mountain Dew yet" Pantz said.

"Pantz is safe" Admin said, throwing her a can.  
"Halloweentown and chill?" Joe asked.  
"No..." Pantz said.

"Pseudonym, Zigster. You two are safe" Admin added.  
"Oooooo~ Doki doki noshina, Admin-san" Ziggy blushed.  
"What he said" Pseudonym added.

"Carz" Admin said.  
"dick" Carz replied.

DaUser and Rydli were the only ones without Mountain Dew. Rydli smiled confidently until he realized he was in the bottom two, he looked around and became nervous. DaUser was nervous too.

"Guys, this is the final can. One of you are about to have your world tour discontinued" Admin said.

The camera focused on the can and then DaUser and Rydli's faces.

"We both did well in the challenge...what seems to be the issue?" Rydli asked.  
"Shut up Rydli don't talk until after the dramatic moment." Admin insisted.  
"The final can goes..."

Rydli narrowed his eyes.

"To..."

Dasjjsname was biting his hair.

"Rydli." Admin finished, handing Rydli the Mountain Dew.

"Me? Why me? I'm one of the users who pay attention to the show!" DaUser protested.  
"What is that supposed to mean haha we're all on the show how would we not pay attention to it you silly" Rydli laughed.

"No! DaUser, I. I. I'm gonna miss you..." Kirby said with tears in their eyes.  
"I'll kiss you too. Now a user's gotta do what a user's gotta do." he replied.

Da users long, flowing hair whipped everyone as he reluctantly strapped on his parachute. He sighed and tried jumping out but he got stuck in the door.

"the" DaUser said.

Admin shoved DaUser out and he flew downwards.

"username..." Kirby sighed.  
"Lmao he got voted off" Bless pointed out.

"34 haikuers still flying. Two teams tied with 17 left. 1,000,000 stars still on the table. Who will be the next to pac their bags? Find of next time on HAIKU! DRAMA! WORLD TOUR!" Admin closed off.

Team Jacob was relaxing in first class.

"Hey, Berk. How's it going." Reu greeted as he sat in the seat across from him.  
"Fine." Berserker replied.  
"So, today was pretty wild, huh?" Reu asked.  
"Why" Berserker asked.  
"Just making conversation." Reu said.

Berserker sat quietly and Reu reclined his seat, looking at the ceiling and sighing as he closed his eyes, thinking about the Mormons.  
Berserker got up and walked away to a secluded area where he took out the team's Book of Mormon and skimmed through the pages.

Back in the storage room, Pantz was waiting for someone. She sat on a box, waiting. For she was waiting. The door opened and Blooberri walked in.

"You bring the stuff?" Blooberri asked.  
"Yeah. This stuff is top of the line. Bears use it." Pantz said.

They looked around to make sure no one was watching, then Pantz opened her jacket, revealing a roll of toilet paper. Blooberri took the roll and hid it in under her hoodie.

"Don't get caught with it" Pantz said, and Bloo nodded as she exited.

Something was watching them behind some boxes.

Meanwhile, Nicholas, Gingerale, and Isaac were standing together in the corner of first class away from the rest of the team.

"Anyone see J?" Gingerale asked.  
"Guys, I'm here!" J shouted, dragging a small bridge with him as he approached.  
"What the fuck, J. Where did you get that?" Gingerale asked.  
"Oh well you know while I was in the forest or whatever I saw this bridge and thought it looked cool. Y'know, give first class a nice zen feel." J smiled.  
"J you can't just steal a bridge, you are going to jail" Nicholas said.  
"Finders keepers though" J protested.  
"J" Gingerale said.  
"Look that's besides the point, we thought tonight we should make things official. We are now a wolf pack, we look out for each other and try to save each other from elimination. And Isaac is also here for some reason" Nicbolas said.  
"I like the atmosphere" Isaac said.  
"Wait Naomi is on our team?" J asked.  
"J really, learn your teammates seriously" Gingerale sighed.  
"Wait a minute so it's ok for Nichols to forget Lemon but if I forget something jts wrong?" J asked.  
"Yes J because when I did it it was for comedic effect to emphasize how unimportant Lemon is. When you do it you just come off as an idiot." Nicholas explained.

"But enough of that, let's get started"

Nicholas took out his pocket knife and cut his hand. He handed it to Gingerale who cut his hand too. Isaac cut his hand and winced a little. Isaac tossed the knife to J. J snipped his hand and screamed very loudly as blood started spraying everywhere.

"AAAAAAH . AAA" J screamed, running around as blood splurged out of his hand.

J ran into a wall and knocked himself out.

"Isn't cutting ourself Elmo?" Isaac asked.  
"No it doesn't count because we're in a pact so it looks cool" Gingerale explained.  
"Blood! Yum!" Mike exclaimed, sucking the blood off Nicholas! Hand.  
"Oh yeah classic Mike. Back in action. Mike. Mike. Mike. That's our Mike. Mike. Twitches forever bro. Nothing will tear us apart" Nicholas said.

Mike stabbed Gingerale and ran away.

Down under the waters of Scotland, the Loch Ness Monster swam by as Mike's iPhone slept on the ocean floor. A photo of Mike and Nicholas eating ice cream was on the screen before it twitched and went black.

End of Day 48  
Initiation at 15.79%  
20-21-14-1 / 19-5-1-19-15-14 / 9-19 / 1-16-16-18-15-1-3-8-9-14-7


	7. The Haikuers Solve the Migrant Crisis

Chapter 7: The Haikuers Solve the European Migrant Crisis

"grounded grounded grounded grounded grounded grounded grounded grounded" Carz said.  
"DryBones is going to get grounded for 391029474629 years if he acts up again during the next challenge" Grenade added.  
"No! Wait until we reach Japan before you ground me, I want to be there! Where they have nice advanced toilets that clean your butt for you!" DryBones exclaimed.  
"Wouldn't it make sense to not want to be grounded there, because then you wouldn't be allowed to explore it because you are being punished?" Grenade asked.  
"No. You're mean, I'm telling the boss on you" DryBones pouted.  
"Who's the boss?" Grenade asked.  
"Uh, that'd be me. The Money Guy. Aka Cloud 9" Cloud tipped his hat.  
"More like Cloud Cringe tbh imo smh btw" Bless said.  
"Oh, you wanna go bro?" Cloud asked, ripping his shirt off and tackling Bless.

Bless pooped on his hand and threw it at Cloud's face, who tore through the shit with his bare hands and slapped Bless.

"Yes. Yes. Let the children fight..." Pseudonym said eagerly.

Shinxy pushed Psudonym out of his seat to sit next to Elrmrnt, purring as he rubbed against him.

"Man this team's chemistry is outstanding." Marrowsky noted.

[Mr. Moogle in le confession toilet]  
"Ok so I didn't want to mention this because I don't want to jinx myself and believe going with the flow instead of trying to predict who will win or lose works better for people, but man am I off my game. First I lose three challenges on the Jacobs, I switch teams and them lose the next two on the Troll Slaiyers. That's five times at the elimination ceremony in a row! I need to stop distracting myself and focus more on playing strategically"  
Moogle pounds his fist.  
[le end]

"Alright guys, we can do this! Stop moping around, we just need some enthusiasm to get our spirits thriving!" Kirby yelled.  
"You seem pretty upbeat, I thought you'd be upset about DaUser leaving" Eden said.  
"Hahahaha oh Eden, no you don't. Only Lukeguy is observant enough to tell something like that. Anyways, being sad will only put me down! Being happy is the key to being positive! Positivity equals winning! Yeah! Yeah!" Kirby cheered.

[Kirby in le confession toilet{  
"Ok I still miss DaUser a bit, but I don't want my team seeing me sad. I'm the happy-go-lucky contestant here and I intend to keep that title"  
[le end]

Paudonym checked his watch.

"Alright, it's been a few days. We can officially start backlash on the person who left" Pseudonym announced.  
"I hate the way DaUser is so fat" Joe said.  
"DaUser is always posting dots like wtf!?" Cloud said.  
"I mean yeah he did some cool things but he also did some not cool things and y'know he wasn't that great" Joe agreed.  
"What was that?" Pantz asked.  
"Uh, Pant. We don't want to be one of those pretentious shows that has to explain every obvious joke through an oblivious character to make sure the joke gets nailed in the viewers head, so can you not?" Mr. Moogle requested.  
"I thought I was the oblivious one?" Kirby asked.  
"Haha that's so oblivious of you to think that" Joe said.  
"Shut up" Bless said.  
"Make me punk" Cloud snapped.  
"I was talking to Joe fool" Bless responded.  
"Joe? Joe mama?" Cloud asked.  
"DON'T TALK ABOJT JOE'S MAMA LIKE THAT" Bless shrieked, pulling Cloud's hat off and whacking Jp with it.

[Cloud in le confession toilet]  
"I don't actually hate Bless it's all just an ironic joke because it's funny. Remember the time me and Bless were stuck in meme hell for two whole weeks? Me neither because it never happened you gullible assholes but if it did we'd have an unbreakable bond."  
[le end]

"Niggers should die" Bless said.  
"aaaa he said the N word" Shinxy said quietly.  
"Oh yeah, you see Shinxy, people like to excessively use the "African" word to try to sound offensive, but just come across as tryhard edgy morons. It's like making 9/11 jokes." Element explained.  
"That sounds...fun...nigger. Nigger. Nigger! NIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGER" Shinxy shouted.  
"Ok we gotta kill Shinxy now" Element said.  
"Yo yo yo, what's up my anime loving friends. Wanna see an anime reaction image? I got those. Wanna see some designated shitposts that no one besides me reposts? I got those." Ziggy announced as he walked in.  
"Ziggy, you haven't responded to my texts in so long..." Bless said sadly.  
"Why have you been texting me you can just talk to me" Ziggy suggested.  
"I" Bless replied.  
"Bless, Ziggy. What's up, my friends?" Rydli greeted.  
"Nice lie Rydli" Ziggy responded.  
"I was just saying hello I didn't even claim anything" Rydli said.  
"Holy shit Rydli I'm tired of you always thinking you're the hottest shit around here give it a break asshole" Ziggy shouted, throwing a cup of orange juice at his face.  
"Nice one, Zig" Bless complimented.

[Rydli in le confession toilet]  
"Some people voted for me last time. I'm going to find out who, and make them pay. Most likely Ziggy because he's been so hostile to me"  
[le end]

"Ziggy, we haven't been on the best terms. Instead of thinking about what we disagree with, we could discuss things we both like" Rydli suggested.  
"Why would anybody ever do that. SES SES SES SES SES SES SES SES SES" Ziggy screamed.  
"Alright I'm gonna go over there now" Rydli said, walking away to do leg stretches.

Meanwhile, with Team Jacob...

"Hey guys, when we jump out of the plane we should all reenact the One Piece opening!" J suggested excitedly.  
"No." Nicholas replied.  
"Oh, alright then." J said as he walked away.  
"Hey guys, when we jump out of the plane we should all reenact the One Piece opening!" J suggested excitedly.  
"J you just said that" Nicholas replied.  
"Oh, sorry. I thought I walked into a different crowd" J explained as he walked away.  
"Hey guys, when we jump out of the plane we should all reenact the One Piece opening!" J suggested excitedly.  
"Sounds like a viable idea, J" Alice said.  
"Don't you think that could kill us" Riley questioned.  
"No you dimwit obviously we'd have parachutes on" Alice bonked his head.  
"No." Luke replied.  
"Hmm, now who else would like my anime references...Gingerale!" J exclaimed.  
"Anyone see him?"  
"He's been playing that new Metal Gear Solid on the TV nonstop" Lemon explained.  
"What? I thought you couldn't play games on that TV" J said.  
"That was just a lie to keep Cloud from playing Smash on it all day" Stickboy explained.

J walked over and jumped on the couch where Gingerale was sitting.

"Hey guys, when we jump out of the plane we should all reenact the One Piece opening!" J suggested excitedly.  
"[insert Metal Gear Solid joke here]"  
"Whoa I didn't know you felt that way. Fine." J said, storming off.

[GingeraleDragon in le confession toilet{  
"Yeah, I know. Me playing on the peasant console? I can explain, I didn't pack my PC for this trip, and I didn't want to build another one when I could get the game and play it on Lemon's PS3."  
Gingerale shutters.  
"Last gen consoles..."  
[le end]

"This game looks pretty cool, yo." Lemon said.  
"Looks alright, but I heard the story has a lack of focus, so I'm not that interested..." Luke said.  
"You have no idea what you're talking about dude this story is so good, the feels man" Gingerale said.  
"Between this and Xenoblade Chronicles X this is gonna be a hype last few months of 2015" Gingerale said.  
"Yeah I lost interest in Xenoblade Chronicles X when I learned there's No Plot" Luke said.  
"Lukeguy nobody but Alice, I mean Madorky, cares what you think, go take this to her" Gingerale suggested.

Luke got up and plopped himself in a seat next to Alice and Riley.

"Hey Luke, how's the book coming along?" Alice asked.  
"Only a few more chapters to write, I'm getting to the climax. The Plot is really good..." Luke said.  
"I bet everyone will find it a good read" Alice said.  
"I don't know I feel like the haikuers wouldn't want to read it" Luke admitted.  
"Why not?" Alice asked.

Nicholas walked by.

"Hey" he greeted.  
"Go away you self-absorbed Unfunny Edgeapus" Luke said.  
"Cool" Nicholas said, walking away.  
"I wish this was Haikik so I could just kick out anyone I don't like" Luke sighed, dropping his head.  
"Yeah the Haikik admins are so bad. But really Kik in general sucks. Did you know the last Kik update for Windows phones was way back in 2012?" Riley informed them.  
"Shut up Riley don't complain about the admins you're just mad you got kicked for viable reasons" Alice said.  
"He just admitted to kicking people he doesn't like" Riley reminded her.  
"That's not a bad reason...Obviously if you don't like someone the logical way to deal with them is to erase them out of your internet life and not take in consideration what the rest of the group feels about those individuals" Luke explained.  
"Agreed"l freaks should just die" Alice said.  
"You're cool" Luke said.

Sam was in the weight room getting swoll. He was on his 50th push-up when Marrowsky and Rydli walked in.

"What the, we have a weight room too?" Rydli asked.  
"This is a very advanced plane if it's big enough to hold a mess hall and a weight room..." Marrowsky said.  
"No this is the cafeteria mess hall kitchen whatever the fuck you want to call it, bitch. I moved a bunch of equipment in here so I can work out in private" Sam explained.  
"Why would you go through all that trouble?" Rydli asked.  
"Because exercising in front of other people makes me shy :$" Sam said.  
"Wow, that's so objectively inaccurate" Marrowsky said.  
"Now, now, this is good. I appreciate moving the equipment here, Samuel, now I can workout anytime!" Rydli said thankfully.

Rydli picked up a 10 lb dumbbell and started lifting.

Nicholas was reading a newspaper.

"Mm, yes. This is some good news" he nodded.  
"Hey Nicholas...when do you think is the next time we can fuse?" Reu asked as he approached him.  
"Is that all I am to you, Reu? A tool to achieve power? Why don't you ever ask me how I'm doing or what I've been up to?" Nicholas asked.  
"Sorry...what've you been up to, Nicholas?" Reu asked.  
"Well now I don't want to talk about it because you're being so insincere" Nicholas closed his eyes.

Reu sighed.

[Reu in le confession toilet]  
"Hey guys, when we jump out of the plane we should all reenact the One Piece opening!" J suggested excitedly.  
"J I'm busy" Reu said.  
"Sorry..." J said, leaving the bathroom.  
"I think fusing with Nicholas is the key to unlocking my hamon. Something about that act gave me a rush, it enhanced the concentration of the water in my body. I don't know if I can fully realize this power yet, but I have to work on it if Nicholas doesn't want to help me"  
[le end]

StarForce was checking steam on his phone when he gasped.

"Oh no!" StarForce said.  
"What is it dude?" Gingerale asked.  
"Ok well you know how I buy something like every week? I'm totally out of money! Oh my Gaben I'm not going to have enough for that thing I wanted..." StarForce panicked.  
"Wow. That sucks." Gingerale said, going back to his game.

"Man it sure has been awhile since I've done anything prominent. I'm gonna continue that trend" Stickboy said, yawning.

Blooberri walked out of the room, looking both ways before peeking a roll of something white and going down the passage hall.  
Stickboy noticed her walking and followed her. As she got to le confession toilet, she pulled the toilet paper out.

"Hey! That's toilet paper!" Stickboy pointed.  
"Sssssh!" Blooberri said, tucking it back down.  
"I thought Admin banned toilet paper?" Stickboy said.  
"Calm down, don't tell anybody about this. Look, I'll let you in on some" Blooberri whispered, taking four sheets off and plopping it in Stickboy's hand.  
"Bloo...you're going about this all wrong. Instead of risking getting caught with it, we should be hiding it in the bathroom itself. Behind the toilet perhaps, nobody ever checks that" Stickboy said.  
"Hmm, good idea" Bloo said.

They both went in and hid the roll in the toilet's tank.  
They walked out and Jp was there.

"Oh, hey" Stickboy said.  
"What were you doing in there?" Jp asked.  
"Uh, drugs. We were doing drugs." Stickboy said.  
"Oh, alright then." Jp replied.  
"Tell Carz I said hi" Blooberri smiled as she and Stickboy walked away.

"I'm bored" Bless said.  
"Alright who turned my dragon dildo into a bong? :/" Shinxy complained.  
"I don't know it could have been anyone" Bless shrugged.  
"It wasn't me Shaggy" Joe said.  
"Me neither" Pantz said.  
"So are we just having a "not it" session?" Pseudo asked.  
"My money's on Bless" Cloud said.  
"Fuck Bless" Carz said.  
"That's racist I'm being oppressed" Bless responded.  
"Alright Bless if it wasn't you then who was it?" Cloud asked.

Tim was smoking the dragon dildo right next to Bless. He was so small his feet barely left his seat.

"It could have been anyone" Tim coughed as he held the bong between his legs.  
"Tim..." Bless said.  
"Classic Tim. But where did he come from?" Cloud asked.  
"I just smell weed and flew on haha" Tim said, smoking some more and making his eyes turn red.  
"Hold on, who is Tim?" Marrowsky asked as he walked in after finishing his workout.

[Song #8 - The Ballad of Tim]  
It was an average mundane Tuesday night,  
And Bless was getting bored

He just got done getting high,  
When an idea came and roared

He sat down and drew a man,  
The man inside his head

And from that sketch came the character,  
"Your name is Tim" he said

The body of a square,  
Held two spiked hairs,  
On the upper left corner

Four lined limbs,  
For his hands and feet,  
Thus came this new stoner

He's a piece of work,  
He's a waste of space  
He does nothing valuable

Like his creator Bless,  
He's just a mess  
"Hey no need to label"

His characteristics, unoriginal  
Lazy, selfish, dim

He's the worst character you'll ever meet  
These are the tales of Tim!  
[le big finish]

"I'm so high right now" Tim said, puking all over Bless.

Tim walked over next to Eden.

"Wanna give me a bj I'll give you a $5 Subway coupon" Tim asked.  
"I have a boyfriend!" Eden said, pushing herself away.  
"Bitch" Tim called out.  
"Aw, he looks so cute!" Kirby exclaimed, picking him up and petting his two spiked hairs.  
"I'm high" Tim told her.

"Attention passengers, we are about to arrive at our next destination. Prepare for landing" Admin announced over the intercom.  
"Alright I sure am excite" Grenade said excitedly.

The plane landed and the 34 haikuers stepped down the stairs and onto the pavement, where they walked over to stand next to their respective teammates.

"Whoa, is this the Great Wall of China?" Grenade asked.  
"No, it's the Great Wall of Australia" Pseudonym replied sarcastically.  
"Wow that was uncalled for. Sorry Pseudonym I'm afraid you're going to have to leave" Grenade said.  
"Wait, this isn't Japan? Aw, we got the lite version..." DryBones sighed.  
"Well, China has the largest population in the world. So no. And what's not to love about China?" Marrowsky asked.  
"Uh, no anime? So it sucks" Cloud said.  
"Are we gonna have to walk this whole thing for the challenge?" Kirby asked.  
"Considering that would take 18 months, I'm gonna go with no." Marrowsky said.

"Welcome to China! Home of Chinese thing. Your first challenge today includes fortune cookies and bicycles." Admin announced as he stepped off the plane.  
"Cycle rickshaws, or-"  
"Like Rick and Morty" Isaac said, causing a long moment of silence.  
"Cycle rickshaws, or bike taxis if you will, are tricycles where the front peddler does all the work while the person in the back relaxes with a nice shade over them. You'll all receive a fortune cookie that will decide your role as either the peddler or the rider" Admin explained, tossing each one a fortune cookie.  
"Race along the wall of china all the way to Beijing, capital of China, where the first team to arrive with all members will get an advantage in the next challenge" Admin finished.  
"These fortune cookies look a little weird...are these...rice balls?" Riley asked as he examined his ball of rice.  
"Goddamnit Imboo what did I tell you about putting 4kids in charge of anything, Jesus they can't get anything right" Admin shouted to the plane, storming off.  
"Hey, Admin. Is Gingerale allowed to use his Coqette?" Nicholas asked jokingly.  
"Coqette?" Lemon asked.  
"You had to be there" Gingerale explained.

The haikuers unraveled their doughnuts and read their fortunes.

"Peddler" GingeraleDragon read.  
"Rev up those trikes, cause I'm ready to fry up some kikes" he said.  
"Peddler. Great." Robot remarked.  
"Peddler" Alice read.  
"Rider. Good I'm used to sitting around all day" Lukeguy said.  
"Rider" Riley read.  
"Hey Alice, team?" Riley asked.  
"Don't do it. Let him go, we don't have time for freaks" Luke suggested.  
"What did I do?" Riley asked.  
"Uh, uh, aaaaaaaaahahsjajab" Lukeguy barfed all over Riley.  
"Luek! What's the matter?" Alice asked, feeling his head.  
"I think I'm coming down with Biased Writing disease." Luke coughed.  
"It's as if everything I say is based on a one-sided viewpoint of me, and only my negative traits are displayed to purposely make me look like a dick, and not any of my redeeming qualities or the reasoning behind my statements are shown" he explained, coughing.  
"What the hell are you trying to validate your criticism or me?" Riley asked.  
"No that's a Nicholas thing to do. That wasn't part of my illness by the way I meant that genuinely. Kill yourself Riley you're a freak" Luke said.  
"No!" Riley replied.  
"Come on Luke you can ride with me" Alice said, helping him to the seat and getting on hers.  
"Alice wait..." Riley held his hand out.

[Riley in le confession toilet]  
"Oh well. Guess I should use this opportunity to get to know someone else on my team and ideally turn them into a subscriber of my channel, GenesisFrenzy, where I review video games and do ramble/reviews of movies such as Attack on Titan part 2, my video would be releasing tonight don't miss it"  
[le end]

"Need a partner?" Robot asked.  
"Sure." Riley said, getting aboard Robot's bike.  
"Hold on. Do you accept R.O.B. as your lord and savior?" Robot asked.  
"Uh, no. I worship Sega" Riley said.  
"Get off." Robot ordered.  
"oh.." Riley said.

Nicholas watched as Riley sighed.

"Having a problem, teammate?" Nicholas asked.  
"Nothing. I just need a partner" Riley said.  
"Well good luck with that, I'm already paired up with my boy Mike" Nicholas said.

Mike jumped on Lemon's bike and they drove away.

"Ok get on my bike" Nicholas said, and Riley got on board.  
"Wait Nick, I thought we were going to go together" Gingerale said.  
"Wow so Riley expected to ride with Madorky, I expected to ride with Mike, and you expected to ride with me, and none of that happened! Sure is, sure is crazy!" Nicholas said, peddling away.

"I'll ride with you if you want" J smiled.  
"Alright, fine J. But no weeb talk. Now get on" Gingerale commanded.  
"Wait I thought you got a sit job thing. I'm a peddler too" J said.  
"[sighs] you fool" Gingerale replied.  
"Sorry" J said making weird noises.  
"I mean if Nicholas is a peddler too where were you expecting to go with that! Huh? Yeah? Yeah your plan doesn't seem so concise in retrospect, ay buddy?" J taunted.  
"I mean if Nicholas is a peddler too where were you expecting to go with that! Huh? Yeah? Yeah your plan doesn't seem so concise in retrospect, ay buddy?" Gingerale repeated in a mocking gay accent.  
"Was that a Haikik repeating shitpost?" Berserker asked.  
"What? No. Don't even try to make that a comparison, I used a tone that was clearly insultive. It's not like I just copy and pasted a shitty joke with no differing infliction for the other members to read as plain text" Gingerale said.  
"Don't you mean inflection?" Berserker asked.  
"No. Saying that wrong was part of the joke. Anyways you need a ride?" Gingrale asked.  
"Yeah I don't like talking to people so if I don't get approached soon enough I'm gonna have to walk alone" Berserker said.  
"StarForce, we should like totally bro down together" J said.  
"Alright if you say so" StarForce said, taking his pants off.  
"No no! I mean we should be partners for this" J said making jizz hands.  
"Oh, alright then. Sure" StarForce said, climbing on.

Blooberri and Isaac teamed up, Bloo being the rider and Isaac peddling.  
Sunnia and Robot teamed up too, with Sunnia doing the riding.  
The remaining members not to choose a partner were Reu, Stickboy, and Sam "The Man" Logan.

"Wait a minute, there aren't enough for everyone to have a partner?" Stickboy asked.  
"Yeah someone found that out a little too late" Reu remarked.

[Stickboy in le confession toilet]  
"Aw SHIET I should have seen this coming. I'm always that guy nobody pays attention to. I'm in the Kik chat and Haiku probably doesn't even care enough to group me with them"  
[le end]

"Alright who wants THE MAN pulling their asses all the way to first!?" Sam asked, bending his muscles.  
"That's strange, because I have a peddler role too." Stickboy said, reading his.  
"So I'm the rider, I'm guaranteed a seat" Reh said.  
"Wait a minute Sam you're a rider too, did you even read this?" Stickboy asked.  
"FUCK YOU STICKBUT NOBODY HAS EVER GAINED ANYTBINF FROM READING UOU LIL CHIMPY HOFXH ILL RIP YOUR BALLSACKS OFF AND MAKE UOU EAT THEM" Sam screamed.  
"Yeah I'm gonna go with Reu for my partner" Stickboy said.  
"That's a-ok with me" Reu said.  
"Alright that's cool, that's cool. I'm Fast anyway, I don't need a bike when I got The Heels" Sam said, pumping his chest.

"Peddler" Bless read.  
"The uh, not peddler one. Driver, no, uh. Rider. Yes, that's it." Ziggy said.  
"Let's go together..." Bless said.

Ziggy got on the seat and Tim sat next to him.

"You'll cowards don't even smoke crack" Tim said.  
"Godspeed!You Black Emperor" Ziggy said.  
"Fuck Minions" Carz said as he read peddler.  
"Jesus when is this dumb minion thing going to end. I think I should just tell Carz to stop it" Element said.  
"What? No! First of all, it's Carz. Talking to him isn't going to do anything. And remember when doge was the worst thing on the planet? Nobody cares anymore, this will blow over and something new will take over in a few months" Mr. Moogle said.  
"Sigh" Element sighed.  
"Pppppppp:...press...less...pedd...ped...peddddleeer..." Shinxy read.

[Shinxy in le confession toilet]  
"This is great, I love being in a submissive state so having to do all the sweaty work while someone is above me will give me a major turn on...hopefully Elly 3  
NIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGER"  
[le end]

"Rider" Moogle read.  
"Peddler? Does Admin even know what this word means?" Pseudonym asked in astonishment as he read his result.  
"Rider" Kirby smiled.  
"Rider" Pantz read.  
"Oooooooh! Pantz, ride me, ride me! Ride me! Pantz ride me! Ride me! Ooksosksj LABZHZ KALA RIDE MEEEEE" Joe screamed.  
"Eden I'll go with you" Pantz decided.  
"Cool" Eden replied.  
"Hmmm, who could I go with. Oh, Grenade! We should work together!" Kirby said enthusiastically, grabbing the sleeve of Grenade's short.  
"What, why me?" Grenade asked.  
"You seem like a fun guy" Kirby said, making Cloud laugh.

"Cloud, would you like the be partners?" Rydli asked.  
"Hm. Hm. Viable shitposts may result from this. I'm in" Cloud said.

Rydli got in the bike and Cloud sat behind under the shade.

[Marrowsky in le confession toilet]  
"I bike all the time, so this should be fun"  
[le end]

"Rider" Marrowsky read.  
"That's a shame." he said.

Marrowsky teamed with Pseudonym.  
Mr. Moogle partnered with Joe.

"DryBones needs to be grounded" Carz said.  
"No!" DryBonss replied.  
"Heyyyyy Element we should work together~" Shinxy giggled.  
"Well what if I have to pedal too?" ELEMENT asked.  
"Well, do you? Read yours" Jp said.  
"I'm going to, uh, you. Rosea, person. That's your name right?" Element asked.  
"Element just read what your role is" DryBones said.  
"He can't he's illiterate" Mr. Moogle said.  
"No I'm not I'm a, uh, rider. Yes." Element said.  
"We can  
NIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGER  
go together 3" Shinxy said, grabbing Element.  
"Ok fine, hopefully you don't try to turn me into one of your furry prostitutes" Element said.  
"Furry prostitutes?" StarForce asked from his bike.  
"Oh yeah, some people give free trades or gifts on steam in exchange for Yiffing It Up" Nicholas explained on the bike next to StarForce and J.  
"Or just role playing in general?" J asked.  
"What? Of course not J. If you're paying someone to do things to you it has to be sex. You wouldn't invite a prostitute over to play Dungeons and Dragons with you, use your brain" Nicholas said.  
"Whoa, that sounds...amazing..." StarForce gawked, thinking of possibilities.

It was down to Carz, Jp, and DryBones to select a partner.

"Looks like one of them are about to walk a lonely walk, the only road they've ever known, am I right?" Element asked.  
"Die" Cloud replied.  
"Terrible" Eden said.  
"Screenshat. Archcrined. Shitposted." Ziggy said.

"Alright. Sorry Carz, no hard feelings. If we lose I won't vote for you, to make up for you not having a partner" DryBones said.  
"Actually I was going to pick Carz to partner with" Jp said.  
"What!" DryBones was in shock!  
"Why him over me, good 'ol DryBones?" FryBones asked.  
"His personality and sense of humor" Jp explained, getting on Carz' bike...z.  
"e621" Carz said.

"The partners have been decided. And two lonely losers have to walk." Admin proclaimed.  
"Hey why don't me and Sam just go together?" DryBones suggested.  
"DryBones what did we say about making dumb comments like that? I'll let it slide this time but next time you're getting the hammer" Admin said.  
"Without further ado, you may begin pedaling" Admin announced, blowing an airhorn.

All of the pairs went off, cycling across the Wall of China.

"Jews" Tim said.

he pairs cycled throughout the Great Wall's path.  
Marrowsky snapped a picture of the scene for his scrapbook.  
Shinxy and Element were in last place, Shinxy panting heavily as they rode 0.5 miles an hour.

"Shinxy, do you think you can-"  
"NIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGER" Shinxy screamed.  
"Never mind" Element sighed.

Joe pedaled fast as Mr. Moogle sat in the back, reading up on some MLP comics.  
They past Lukeguy and Alice.

"We're gonna last Niclas!" Joe shouted excitedly.  
"Cool" Mr. Moogle added.

Their bike caught up to Nicholas and was slowly pushing past them.

"Hey, uh, Nicholas, do something" Riley said.  
"Hey, uh, I, uh, well gee uh, I'm working on it" Nicholas replied, moving his bike next to Joe and Moogle's.

Nicholas threw his bike into the other, knocking it off course a bit and almost crashing it into the wall, but it regained direction and returned to its place next to Nicholas and Riley.

"Oh ho ho, you are SO going down" Moogle threatened.

Joe threw the bike into Nicholas', pushing it up against the wall where other pairs took the opportunity to pedal past them.  
Moogle took a drumstick out of his pocket and threw it at Nicholas and Riley's wheel. The bike flipped and they both fell out, letting Moogle and Joe proceed.

"Alright!" Mr. Moogle cheered.  
"That was ridonculous" Joe cheered, giving Moogle a high five, but letting go of the handle bars caused her to steer awkwardly and they crashed into the edge.

Pantz and Eden pedaled besides Cloud and Rydlu.  
Pantz waved and Cloud blushed.

"Got a thing for Pantz, Cloud?" Rydli asked.  
"Got a thing for Shrek, Cloud?" Cloud repeated back.  
"Cloud I was just making a friendly gesture" Rydli said.  
"Cloud I was just making a friendly gesture" Cloud repeated back.  
"Cloud these don't even sound shitpost-worthy" Rydli told him.  
"I know that's the joke." Cloud explained.  
"What? That they aren't good?" Rydli asked.  
"Yeah idiot it's so unfunny that it's funny" Cloud explained.  
"Alright then... so Pantz, how's Piano doing?" Rydli asked.  
"She transferred...into musical theater now, making lots of friends" Pantz said.  
"That's great. She was...she was so cool..." Rydli said, sniffling a bit.  
"Are you about to cry?" Eden asked.  
"No. I just remembered a funny Miiverse post where Miriel said a toad tactician would have a lot of disadvantages" Rydli said.  
"Fuck you Toad is epic bro" Cloid said.  
"Right, and I suppose you're one of those people who want to see Toad get into Smash, right?" Rydli scoffed.  
"He'd be better than 50 Fire Emblem characters!" Cloud snapped back.  
"THEY WOULD ALL BRING SOMETHING NEW TO THE TABLE AND ALSO PROVIDE WAIFU SERVICE" Rydli defended.  
"Fuck you!" Cloud screamed, leaping on Rydli, steering the bike off course and crashing into Pantz and Eden.  
"Why can't we have interactions like that?" Pantz asked.

Pantz and Eden's bike got knocked off the wall. Pantz grabbed onto the ledge and grabbed Eden's hand. Their bike fell to the ground below and exploded.

[Rydli in Cloud in le confession toilet]  
"Back in season 2, you may remember me and Cloud had a huge waifu war" Rydli explained.  
"I killed Lucina's voice actor and made her into a bowl of chili and made Rydli eat it" Cloud shrugged, and Rydli nodded.  
"But I got over it, then longed for Piano. That didn't go so well either...but it's okay! I have a girlfriend now so it's not like I'm lonely" Rydli said.  
"Why are we sharing a toilet?" Cloud asked as the toilet sucked their feces out together.  
[le end]

Pantz and Eden dusted themselves off as they got up.

"Well we lost or bike, how are we gonna finish this now?" Pantz asked.  
"With our legs" Eden replied.  
"Just get on our bike, we can all go together" Rydli said.  
"But then you'll have to be supporting the weight of three people" Eden said.  
"Ladies, ladies. I think you're forgetting a certain...stretch I'm known for doing..." Rydli explained.

Pantz and Eden got on the back, with Cloud sitting in the middle.

"Hey bro" Pantz greeted.  
"Hi" Cloud replied.

Rydli used his tremendous leg power to pedal fast. The bike took speed and flew, passing Marrowsky and Pseudonym, Reu and Stickboy, and then Lemon and Mike.

"Get rekt" Rydli called out to them.

"Get rekt" Mike repeated.  
"Get rekt" Mike repeated.  
"Get rekt" Mike repeated.  
"Get rekt" Mike repeated.  
"I think Rydli needs to check himself into the good taunting store and escort himself out" Lemon said.  
"Oh shit Lem!" Eden yelled back as the distance between them grew larger.  
"Eden..." Lemon said quietly under his breath.

"We need to catch up with the other teams fam" Ziggy said.

Bless and Ziggy were in the back of the pack, only Shinxy and Element were behind them.

"Come on Tim help me out I don't want to look bad in front of Ziggy..." Bless pleaded.  
"Alright hold up nigger I got just the thing" Tom said, pulling out a lighter.  
"Oh a lighter..badass..."

Tim lit a flame and farted into it. The fart was so strong the bicycle gained speed, taking off and flying past many other pairs.  
Element watched with concern.

"Shinxy we're in dead last you gotta go faster" Element complained.  
""Get rekt" Mike repeated. Oh shit wrong thing was on my clipboard, hold on.  
NIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGER" Shinxy replied.  
"Shinxy I don't want to be the last team there. I'll, um, I'll...I'll give you a blowjob if we reach the destination first" Element said.

[Element in le confession toilet]  
"I know, I know, what the fuck? But it's ok! I'm 100% positive there is no way Shinxy can reach there before everyone else, but this will motivate him to at lest push past a few teams"  
[le end]

"nah" Shinxy said.  
"What, why not?" Element asked.  
"Obviously Im not going to get thar first at tis rate, and so yew just sad that to mak me think I wud" Shinxy explained.  
"JUST GO FASTER THAN 0.5 MPH THAT'S LITERALLY SLOW" Element screamed.  
"Don't screm at meee :(((((" Shinxy complained.

Element took his fedora off and stuffed it in his pants, rubbing his dick all over it. He attached a hook to it and threw it in front of Shinxy, attached to a fishing rod.

"Hey, Shinxy look! If you catch the hat you get to smell my cock!" Element teased.

Shinxy panted and jumped at the fedora, but Element raised it so Shinxy missed it. Shinxy chased the hat, picking up speed, and Element continued to bounce it out of his reach.

"That's not a bad idea" Reu said, looking back.

Reu took a Little Mac amiibo and dangled it over Stickboy's head.

"Reu I have every amiibo I don't care about getting another Little Mac" Stickboy said.  
"Damn..." Reu snapped his fingers.

Berserker and Gingerale were picking up speed, currently in 5th place.

"We got this challenge in our bag. And JUST in case,

I brought my badass swords." Gingerale said.

"AAAAA you're like Zoro from One Piece omg 3" J said as he and StarForce rode up to them.  
"J. Shut up. You filthy weeb. Now!" Gingerale screamed.  
"Let me just take those swords away before you do anything rash..." Berserker said, taking the swords out of Gingerale's mouth.

"StarForce how are you doing back there bud?" J asked.  
"Great! I've been making some arrangements on my steam, contacted a few friends, and I'm in the process of starting my own business!" StarForce said with glee.  
"Whoa, really? That's so cool :0" J said.  
"What do you do?" J asked.  
"Well I got a bunch of fellas together to agree to split a profit in a communication-type of business. Basically, they go out and yiff with someone for gifts and money, then report the money to me, I keep the cash but they get a cut" StarForce explained.  
"Wait what's the point of you helping them?" J asked.  
"Settle down, now, I was just getting to that. With me, I can get them more customers willing to yiff. I can build a name for ourselves, and as our business grows we'll get even more furries to yiff for me. Everyone gets some money but I do all the organization and planning so I get the biggest cut." StarForce explained.  
"Wow that reminds me of the time I crossdressed and walked on a highway, some guy offered me a lift, but I think he wanted to do something else to me..." J said.  
"Whoa, my Yiffing company is thriving. We already made $1000 off of rps" StarForce celebrated.

Jp and Carz bumped into StarForce and J's bike.

"Oh, hey guys" J greeted.  
"FUCK YOUUUUUUUU PENIS DOCK E621 CROPPED YIFF AAAAAAAHA" Carz bumped into them again.  
"Hey J" Jp greeted.  
"Remember the J alliance that was a classic haha" J said.  
"No this is my first season." Jp replied.  
"Oh..." J said.

J steered into Carz and Jp, knocking their bike into Grenade and Kirby.

"Oh crap" Grenade groaned.  
"I got this!" Kirby said.

Kirby got up and jumped on Jp and Carz' bike, then over to J and StarForce's.

"Hey" J greeted.

Kirby punched J off the bike, where Alice and Luke rode over him.

"Aaaaaaah!" StarForce panicked.

Kirby grabbed StarForce by his shirt but he took if off, causing Kirby to lose balance and fall back.

"We're gonna see Gluvr's fat corpse" Luke said excitedly.  
"Oh no!" Jp said, grabbing Kirby's hand.

StarForce narrowed his eyes and screamed aggressively. He leaped over to Jp and Carz' bike but fell off.

"Thanks guys" Kirby thanked.  
"Dick" Carz replied.

Kirby jumped over back on Grenade's bike.

"Let's go!" Kirby said, pointing forward.

Grenade pedaled faster, and the bike sped past Alice and Luke, then Nicholas and Riley.  
Grenade and Kirby flew down the path, reaching the finish line waiting for them at Beijing.

"Wooooo!" Kirby cheered.

Grenade hit the breaks and they came to a stop, getting off.

"Wow that was great" Grenade said.  
"I know right? The way I best J and StarForce up, and you...you pedaled! That was cool" Kirby said.

Nicholas and Riley came pedaling up to them, getting off next.

"Wow great job you got here first, too bad there's no prize and all that matters is not getting here last" Nicholas said.  
"Wow this place looks so cool. I have an Asian girlfriend, she looks like a lot of these people" Riley said.

Luke and Alice arrived next, followed quickly by Stickboy and Reu and then Gingerale and Berserker.

"Suddenly I'm not so excited..." Kirby said.  
"Cheer up, even if we lose it's just the first one, remember?" Grenade said.  
"You okay, Luke?" Alice asked.  
"You kids need to kill yourselves" Luke coughed.  
"What's wrong with him?" Reu asked.  
"He caught the biased writing disease, it's like taking a bunch of things he says out of context to paint him in a bad light" Alice explained.  
"Wow, that's so...random, and weird how you could identify it a few seconds after the symptoms started showing" Rey said.  
"No you see you just said that was weird so it's alright, you see you can do something really stupid and inexplicable but as long as you have somebody acknowledge that it's stupid and inexplicable that makes it okay." Luke explained.

Rydli, Cloud, Pantz, and Eden finished next, followed quickly by Jp and Carz, then Joe and Moogle and Pseudonym and Marrowsky.  
Mike and Lemon, Blooberri and Isaac, and Bless and Ziggy came next.

"Who's left?" Isaac asked.  
"Element, Shinxy, DryBones for us. For the other team Jonah, StarForce, Robot, Sunnia, and Sam" Marrowsky counted.

"We're here" Robot beeped, riding up to everyone.  
"You guys should check out my Attack on Titan Part 1 ramble/review on my channel GenesisFrenzy" Riley said.  
"I thought it was part 2" Robot said.  
"Part 2 isn't even out yet..." Riley said.  
"But in your...uh..." Robot stopped herself.  
"What!" Riley asked.

J and StarForce were limping their way down the path.

"We're gonna make it!" J cheered.  
"Outta my way sluts" Sam taunted, running past them and pushing them down.

Sam got to the finish line.

Shinxy tiredly pedaled slowly past J and StarForce, making their way to the finish line first. Element yanked his fedora into his hands away from Shinxy.  
J and StarForce continued to limp, collapsing once they regrouped with everyone else.

"Are we last?" J asked.  
"Nope, but your second to last. DryBones hasn't gotten here yet, so his team loses! Once he gets here, I'll explain the second challenge" Admin announced.  
"Phew!" StarForce said.  
"Are you proud of me Gingerale?" J asked.  
"No." Gingerale replied.  
"Awww why not!?" J asked.  
"Your bike didn't get destroyed you just fell off it why the heck didn't you get back on it?" Gingerale asked.  
"Oh..." J replied.  
"I'm gonna use the time until DryBones gets here to look around the city" Mr. Moogle said, walking off.  
"Maybe I'll see my teacher's son. He doesn't have a name, he's just called the teacher's son" J exclaimed.  
"Yeah J because the odds of you finding one person you know just walking around on a country as huge as China is certainly plausible" Alice said.  
"See you said that the odds of that actually happening aren't good so now it could happen and it would be alright because you acknowledge it's unrealistic" Luke said.  
"Haha Luke you're so cool" Riley said.  
"I hate you go die" Luke replied.

The haikuers started wandering around Beijing.

"Wow China sure is crowded, there's a lot of people here" Grenade said.  
"Have you guys heard about the European Migrant Crisis?" Kirby asked.  
"Ok that came out of nowhere" Grenade said.  
"A few days ago we told Gluvr about how oblivious they can be because they didn't get a joke about bringing Matt Damon home, so I guess Gluvr's been keeping up with current events to try to stay in the loop" Cloud explained.  
"So, like, a bunch of immigrants and refugees have been showing up in Europe. It's crazy" Kirby said.  
"Wow thanks for elaborating the European Migrant Crisis is about migrants migrating to Europe" Pseudonym replied.  
"Any other riveting current events?" Marrowksy asked.  
"I don't know let me google" Kirby said, taking out a phone.

Nicholas overheard their conversation.  
Team Jacob was sitting around on the steps of the Temple of Heaven. Want a reference pic in case you don't know what it looks like off the top of your head? Ok no.

"Guys I think Gluvr's on to something here." Nicholas said.  
"What do you mean?" Isaac asked.  
"Well, look at the way China deals with these type of things. The one-child policy controlled the population, made sure things didn't get too out of Control." Nicholas explained.  
"One-child policy?" StarForce asked.

A Chinese woman walked over and a baby pooped out of her vagina.

"Waaaah" it cried:  
"Zhè shì yīgè nǚhái" the lady screamed, picking the baby up and stabbing s knife through its throat. She ripped the head off and drank the blood, squishing the soft skull in her hands. Then walked away.

"You see if you limit the number of babies a country has, especially females, the population won't be growing all wily nily" Nicholas explained.  
"Wait so you think if we establish a rule like that we could stabilize the immigration crisis?" Isaac asked.  
"No, no, you guys. I see what the Chinese are doing but this is ruthless, uncalled for. What we could really use is just a huge massacre. Like if we got a bunch of suicidal people and murdered them all perhaps? You know those Dynasty Warriors games, right? I mean just go around killing a bunch of people, sounds nice right? I even brought my own swords" Gingerale said, taking his sword out.  
"We could build a bunch of concentration camps and gas them" Luke suggested.  
"Hold on guys, wait, wait. This is kinda like what happened in Legally Blonde, so they-" J began.  
"J, J, nobody has seen Legally Blonde, shut up" Nicholas said.  
"Look, guys. You're going about this ALL wrong. What we could really use is some inspiration from China, not with controlling birth rate, but with another issue. The Chinese built the Great Wall to keep out invaders, so we can use this idea. We can build a giant wall to keep all the Mexicans out" Nicholas suggested.  
"We can make the immigrants pay for the wall themselves, everything will check out" Stickboy said.  
"Yeah shut up Stickboy you're not part of the gang" Nicholas said.  
"The gang?" Stickboy asked.  
"Well the Troll Slaiyers think they're funny haha for naming themselves off a team from Tails Gets Trolled, but really, I think we're the true Slaiyers in heart. Think about it, our team has much more variety. We have a stereotypical gay guy" Nicholas said.  
"Oh you guys" J blushed.  
"The Boss, or, The Awesome, me. The Sissy, Luke"  
"I don't agree with that" Luke protested.  
"The Power, Sam, The Bastard, Gingerale...The Guy With No Ears...Mike because Well stick figures don't have ears...and The Fire Power...Alice because she likes to fart." Nicholas continued.  
"What you left out like half the team!" Bloo complained.  
"I want something, what can I have?" Riley asked.  
"Oh, fine, you can be The Money Guy" Nicholas said.  
"What? What the heck is that?" Riley asked.  
"He's The Money Guy" Alice said.  
"I'm not a sissy I give controversial and cutting edge thoughts that no one else dare speaks!" Luke protested.  
"Ok fine Lukeguy if you want to be excluded so badly StarForce can be The Sissy instead" Nicholas decided.  
"Yes!" StarForce said.  
"Wait, wait, wait. So we were talking about a giant wall and now we're going into the gang...I'm so confused about the did we did not of where we go for currently?" Reu asked.  
"True" Isaac said.  
"So all in all, the lesson learned here is we need to get rid of those freakin immigrants and-" Gingerale began.  
"Marrowsky's name has trumpets in it..." J said.  
"Thanks for interrupting the flow of the conversation J." Gingerale thanked.

DryBones was far behind, still running down the path on the Great Wall. He was so tired he was on the ground crawling.

The Troll Slaiyers were checking out the Beijing food market.

"This crap doesn't look anything like Chinese food" Cloud said.  
"I don't care what it is its food haha looks yum haha him ha his a Shsjjsnivher !jZkzijlpibjpKBj  
I eat dick the end" Joe said.  
"I eat dick the end" Cloud repeated.

No one else continued.

"Oh, that's right...none of my fellow kikes are here..." Cloud murmured.  
"I eat dick the end" Eden repeated.  
"I eat dick the end" Ziggy repeated.  
"Don't you guys ever get tired of shitposting? What's even the point of it?" Element asked.  
"Oh sure you think we're bad for doing it but if Mike does it you don't even care" Cloud said.  
"Oh here we go again, these dumb 'Element hates Haikik but likes Mike' jokes. Just grow up and get of it" Element complained.  
"You do realize Mike insults you on Haikik right. Not just in the form of reposting he has called you out on posts before" Cloud said.  
"I don't care, Cloud! I get made fun of all the time, I'm used to it!" Element said, storming off.  
"Ironic how...the people who made fun of you the most, are the ones you're closest with now..." Cloud said.  
"Leave him alone, Cloud" Mr. Moogle defended.  
"Where is all of this even coming from?" Element asked defiantly.  
"NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGG-"  
"Okay I can here looking for some cultural food to try and to have a good time and I'm honestly feeling bummed out right now" Pseudonym said.

[Element in le confession toilet]  
"Cloud is seriously getting on my nerves. I bet he's getting this thing from Lukeguy...hey, that's it. Lukeguy has that biased writing disease thing, I must have it too, that could explain me...uh...ok I don't know where I'm going with this. Fuck Cloud end of video.  
[le end]

Grenada and Kirby were eating cooked dog.

"These are some good dogs" Grenade said.  
"Yeah, they're really eh huh eh hahehhh ah you can say ehhh ehh uhhhhuh ah ah whhhh I guess you could eh heh guess you could say they're hot eheheh" Kirby joked.

[Grenade in le confession toilet]  
"Hanging or with Gluvr or Kirby or whatever has been surprisingly fun. That's it. Nothing else. That's all I wanted to say.  
[le end]

"You know what, is it just me or am I the only one without a significant meme?" Grenade asked.  
"What?" Kirby asked.  
"I mean what am I really known for? Goanimate videos?" Grenade asked.  
"Oh, uh, I don't know, I'm oblivious lol! But you don't necessarily need to have a meme that defines you" Kirby said.  
"I guess" Grenade said.

Team Jacob was now in the outskirts of Beijing. StarForce had an anthropomorphic panda under his left arm and an anthropomorphic dragon under his right, sitting on a bench and texting on his phone.

"StarForce, what is this?" Isaac asked.  
"Oh these are just my bitches. They roleplay and cyber with other people for me and get paid with Steam trades" StarForce explained.  
"Why are they here though...and not online..." Isaac asked.  
"Oh you see I found a bigger opportunity. People are willing to pay even more money if they have sex in real life! And seeing as though we're traveling around the world, I can hook all kinds of people up!" StarForce exclaimed.

"StarForce what the fuck you're not gonna find random furries on the street" Reu said.  
"I want 15 minutes with the panda" a shady twitchy guy in a tench coat said.  
"I'll see you later daddy" the panda said, grabbing the man's hand and walking into an alley.  
"Daddy?" Reu asked.  
"Oh they just call me that because I adopted them. For some reason roleplayers love calling their friends their mom or dad or son or daughter" StarForce explained.  
"I'd like to do some hand stuff with you, daddy..." The dragon whispered to StarForce.  
"Not now bitch I got a game to focus on" StarForce hushed.

"Man everybody here looks like Jackie Chan" Riley exclaimed as he looked around.  
"Hey Mike what's happening bro" Nicholas greeted.  
"I eat dick the end" Mike repeated.  
"I eat dick the end" Mike repeated.  
"I eat dick the end" Mike repeated.  
"I eat dick the end" Alice repeated.  
"I eat dick the end" Mike repeated.  
"Haha oh Mike. Anyways what's going on?" Nicholas asked.  
"Hey Noclas!" Mike replied.

[Nicholas in le confession toilet]  
"I was practically the only person Mike talked to while he was banned. We're...pretty tight..."  
[le end]

"I was wondering if you wanted to help StarForce with me, we were going to find some frisky inflation artists and hook them up with his pimping business" Nicholas suggested.  
"Krogre. I'm too busy, I was about to play Smash with Alice and Luke! See ya!" Mike said, walking toward Alice and Luke.  
"Smash..." Nicholas said.  
"I EAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT CRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAABD" Sam screamed.  
"Hey Nicholas, we gonna build a wall or what?" Gingerale asked.  
"Yes because China needs more walls. It's not like the immigrants are a problem here though" Nicholas said.  
"Guys, you're not going to believe this! A typhoon is heading our way holding thousands of immigrants!" Bloo said, reading a newspaper.  
"You're right I don't believe it, what is this nonsense?" Stickboy asked.  
"No...no...I was afraid something like this would happen. You can't just bring one Mexican somewhere. They travel in packs. Bless must be attracting the immigrants towards China" Alice deduced.  
"Or it was me, also a Mexican" Lemon stated.  
"Really Lemon!? Why would you throw yourself under the bus like that?" Alice asked.  
"Mexicans suck." Luke said.  
"Shut up Lenon you stinkin yellow person" Isaac said.  
"We have to guard the wall, we'll eliminate any immigrants that come our way." Nicholas decided.  
"Well maybe I don't like the way you're taking up half of the team dialogue" Lemon complained.  
"Ok first of all nice delayed comeback, secondly no one cares Lemon. We must train so we can beat up those immigrants and kick them out of this land..." Nicholas said.  
"This is what happens when there's no challenge and the haikuers are left to find their own source of entertainment." J said.

Ding!

"DryBones! Still isn't here! So we're having a song to spice things up. Troll Slaiyers and Team Jacob, get singing" Admin said.

Troll Slaiyers walked into the scene, now the two teams were together.

"Did you guys split up at all today? You stick together so much you're like those freaks from Kids Next Door. Jeez. Geez. Just sing" Admin said, walking away.

"As someone who got voted off in season one for not singing, I know not to screw things like this up" Grenade said.

"We were just talking about our plan to attack the incoming immigrant shitstorm" Alice explained.  
"Cool. Training montage?" Cloud asked.  
"Let's do this!" Kirby said excitedly.

Alice stepped up.

"There is not a meme I doth know. I know all memes. And you will too." Alice said.

Alice pulled out a laptop, on the screen was Knowyourmeme's front page.

"Making a meme takes discipline, strength, preservation, and most of all, heart. Make a meme and get over 100 upvoteds, then you will have proven thyself" Alice commanded.

The haikuers took turns trying to make memes, posting each on Knowyourmeme. But none of them reviewed any upvotes.

"My memes are? Not good?" Eden asked with a confused look on her face

Shinxy's meme was just the word nigger plastered over and over on a Team Fortress 2 pic.  
"We have a long way to go..." Alice said.

[Song #9 - I'll Make A Meme Out of You]

Alice: Let's get down to business, on the Internet  
Nicholas: Find some stupid photos, with no captions yet.  
Gingerale: You're the weirdest pic I've ever seen,  
Luke: But you can bet before we're through  
J: Somehow I'll make a meme out of you

Jp: Viral as a lolcat, cool as Good Guy Greg  
Kirby: Find some awkward places, for miss Jolie's leg  
Marrowsky: One does not simply make a meme,  
Pseudonym: But I'll try to caption you.  
Bless: Someday I'll make a meme out of you.

Eden: Hey look I'm on the Internet!  
[Eden slips off a slope of irony]  
Shinxy: Rolling on the floor and LOL-ing.  
[Shinxy falls down and gets yiffed in the butt]  
Stickboy: Annoying Facebook girl says OMG.  
[Stickboy gets memes on by trolls]

Reu: Advice dog makes the greatest pet.  
[Memes are beating up Grenade]  
Grenade: I hope he doesn't know I'm trolling.  
Mike: Is that penguin awesome or awkward socially?

DryBones: (BE A MEME!) [DryBones collapses on the ground]  
Cloud: You must be clever and clearly captioned,  
DryBones: (BE A MEME!) [DryBones collapses on the ground]  
Ziggy: With all the wit of a short cartoon,  
DryBones: (BE A MEME!) [DryBones collapses on the ground]  
StarForce: Not sure if funny or just addictive,  
Element: Mysterious and it's gonna get you soon.

[The haikuers are running, carrying feels over their heads]

Blooberri: So much time is wasted, just click one more page,  
Sunnia: Tools of mass distraction, for the modern age,  
[Grenade faints and drops all of his feels]  
Riley: You're not well-thought out, or even close enough,  
[Alice makes Grenade leave]  
Pantz: But the editors are few  
Joe: That's how I'll make a meme out of you!

[Grenade sighs but then looks over at the laptop]

DryBones: (BE A MEME!) [DryBones collapses on the ground]  
Isaac: You must be clever and clearly captioned,  
[Grenade drinks a can of Red Bull and types on the laptop vigarously]  
DryBones: (BE A MEME!) [DryBones collapses on the ground]  
Rydli: With all the wit of a short cartoon,  
[The other haikuers notice Grenade captioning a meme and gather around to watch]

DryBones: (BE A MEME!) [DryBones collapses on the ground]  
Lemon: Not sure if funny or just addictive,  
[Grenade's KYM post starring Goanimate characters has 100 upvotes]  
Carz: Mysterious and it's gonna get you soon.  
[Alice nods and smiles]

DryBones: (BE A MEME!) [DryBones collapses on the ground]  
Mr. Moogle: You must be clever and clearly captioned,  
[Eden skis past the slope, mastering irony]  
DryBones: (BE A MEME!) [DryBones collapses on the ground]  
Robot: With all the wit of a short cartoon,  
[Shinxy becomes the yiffer and not the yiffee]  
DryBones: (BE A MEME!) [DryBones collapses on the ground]  
Sam: Not sure if funny or just addictive,  
[Stickboy beats up the trolls]  
Berserker: Mysterious and it's gonna get you soon.  
[Grenade raises the feels over his head]  
[le big finish]

"What the fuck was that" Ziggy asked.  
"We all mastered memes so now we have the power to fight the immigrants" Alice said.

All of the haikuers were back at the Great Wall of China. DryBones, aka The Bitch, was still crawling his way to the finish line.

The typhoon of immigrants was approaching.

"Get ready everyone. Immigrants are coming" Pantz said, looking through her telescope.  
"Pantz is the best person in the world anyone want to see my collection of saved Pantz photos?" Lukeguy asked.  
"Me" Riley said.  
"No you're a freak who needs to die" Luke replied.  
"Omg he's doing it again Luke's being irrational haha! Riley said.  
"You post a bunch of porn of stupid shit that nobody likes, you constantly complain about the mods, and you taunted me about things I don't care trying to edge me. I didn't kick you for no reason you idiot. You're bringing this up with no context to make me look bad when most on the people on our team barely know who you are let alone what our beef was. This whole thing has been over and done with for awhile and you're in the chat now so Get Over It, and I'm never apologizing." Luke replied.  
"Oh..." Riley replied.  
"Wow Luke has said more today than the entirety of the first 6 episodes, am I right?" Alice said.

Riley walked away from Alice and Luke and stood next to Nicholas.

"I'm starting to think biased writing isn't a real disease" Riley said.  
"Maybe you just needed to actually ask him to explain his reasoning for him to say it" Lemon said.  
"Shut up Lemon." Riley sighed.

"Everything's almost done, but there's one last thing we need...an animal sidekick for the kids." Joe said.  
"I know a guy" Tim said, dialing someone on his cell phone.  
"Seriously what's the point of Tim being here?" Element asked  
"I don't know what's the point of you existing buttmunch?" Tim replied.

A purple dragon came swooping down from the skies. If landed before all of the haikuers and widened its wings for all of them to behold.

"Hi Im fucking Spyro" Spyro greeted.  
"Whoa Spyro that's cool. Such an iconic character, huh? Yeah I'm glad Spyro could come here tonight, glad we got the Spy-ster, such a character. So, so cool. Spyro yeah." StarForce said.  
"I'm Spyro and I'm a fucking badass. I heard you have some immigrants causing trouble so I'll help you with your woes here" Spyro said.  
"But Spyro. Surely you must be busy worth saving the world from something, right?" Riley asked.  
"No. I'm not busy..." Spyro replied.  
"What? Why not? A character like you should be out on an adventure right now.." Riley continued.  
"Because I don't...have any games out right now..." Spyro said quietly.  
"But wait, you do, it's called Sky-"

Spyro jumped on Riley and tore his shirt up, clawing his face and body.

"Oh shit oh shit live rape!" Mike said.  
"Get em, get em" Lemon cheered.

The immigrants were thrown it of the typhoon and started getting near the wall.

"Guys, it's time to do battle..." Jp said.

All of the haikuers got to the ground and the Mexicans started running towards them.

"Just imagine them all as Bless" Bless said.

The haikuers started wailing on the Mexicans.

"Are Mexicans even the ones that are part of the Migrant Crisis?" Pseudonym asked.  
"I don't care I just want to beat up Mexicans" Cloud said.

J chipped a nail and started crying.  
Gingerale sliced up a dozen Mexicans wtb his swords.  
Isaac threw rocks at them.  
Mike are them.  
Marrowsky drove over a bunch of them with a car, driving stick shift.  
Grenade bashed a laptop off their heads.  
Kirby stabbed a bunch of them and danced in their blood.  
StarForce has his bitches attack.  
Jp threw paper at them.  
Element dropped his PC on their heads.  
Nicholas showed them his flips.  
Tim smoked some weed.  
Shinxy humped them.  
Eden slapped them.  
Cloud shot them with a gun.  
Berserker zapped them with his laser cannon.  
Robot did a side B into a line of them.  
Joe dated them and then broke up with them and made them feel awkward so they left.  
Rydli whacked them with his dumbbell.  
Lukeguy jumped on them like an ape and beat them up.  
Lemon told them bad jokes.  
Stickboy stole their amiibo.  
Jan was jealous of Marcia for beating up less Mexicans than her but getting more recognition for it.  
Ziggy said kys and they did.  
Alice farted into a lighter and ignited 20 Mexicans.  
Bless shit himself.  
Riley had a sexual outbreak over them.  
Mr. Moogle shoved his drumstick into their eyes.  
Pantz slapped them with her sketching notebook.  
Carz showed his face and a bunch of Mexican faces melted.  
Blooberri didn't do anything bad because she's a nice gal, and Sunnia didn't either because she's shy o/o  
Sam beat them up with his Strong muscles.  
Pseudonym gave an effortless slap at one of them.  
Spyro rammed into a bunch of Mexicans and stabbed them with his horns.  
Reu concentrated the flow of water in his veins. He unleashed his haki and best up 50 Mexicans at once.

"Wow, you did it. Nice job man" Alice complimented.  
"No, no, no. That wasn't hamon, that was haki, shiiiit" Reu growled.  
"What?" Gingerale asked.  
"Oh yeah there are like 50 different anime power ups that are about concentrating your mind, spirit, energy and all that shit. Must have accidentally triggered a wrong one" Alice said.  
"Damn it I need more work on hamon" Reu said.  
"Whoa Reu are you Jamaican 'cause you're making me go ha, mon." Lemon said.

"These Mexicans suck what are they even going to fight back with, a donkey? Because they're smelly?" Cloud laughed.

A donkey walked into view.

"Hey look it's Bless" Eden joked.  
"Alright guys let's kill le donkey" Ziggy said.  
"What? That's horrible. We can't hurt an animal" Element defended it.  
"You didn't care about the hundreds of Mexicans we just beat up?" Marrowsky asked.  
"Those are people, this is a defenseless animal..." Element said.  
"I'll do it because I'm Spyro on a badass and I have a huge dick" Spyro said, going up to the donkey.

The donkey whistled and a huge dragon swooped in and front of it.

"OH SHIT THE DONKEY HAS A DRAGON GIRLFRIEND LIKE IN SHREK" Berserker screamed.  
"Guess we're not just IMAGINING Dragons anymore, huh?" Element joked.  
"What's with you and bad music references?" Mr. Moogle asked.

The dragon whacked its tail and stuck a bunch of Mexicans, then breathed fire and crisped a bunch of them. It bent over and chewed their heads off.

"Spyro save us!" Riley pleaded.  
"Fuck you I'm not killing myself" Spyro replied.  
"Wow not so badass now, huh? Grow some balls" Gingerale said.  
"Balls...that's it..." Shinxy said, grabbing a pocket knife.

Shinxy walked over to Spyro and pinned him to the ground.

"Hey, what are should doing with that- AHHH AHHH AGHHHHH AHHHHHH AHHHHHHHHHH AHHHHHHH OSKSKSJSHDH AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH" Spyrp screamed in pain, moving around trying to escape.  
"Pussy" Bless insulted.

The haikuers watched with a horrified look.

"Now I have a new dragon dildo yay" Shinxy cheered.  
"Aw, it's disgusting when Charly does it but charming when Shinxy does" Isaac said.  
"No, still disgusting" Element said, leaning over and barfing on Cloud's brand new shoes.  
"Really?" Cloud asked stubbornly.

StarForce sighed.

"I have an idea" he said.  
"Give us the deets" Jp said.  
"Element lure the dragon in with your wiener smelling fedora" StarForce commanded.  
"Why would that possibly lure the dragon in?" Element asked.  
"Remember when you said if you had a fursona it would be a dragon. That means your wiener has the scent of one. So the dragon will like that" StarForce explained.  
"Ok that sounds retarded but so is everything else on this show so I'll believe it" Element said, handing StarForce the fedora.

StarForce faced the dragon and waved the fedora at it.  
The dragon sniffed and then dig its nose into Element's fedora, getting a nice whiff.

"Alright bitches now show this dragon a good time" StarForce said.

StarForce's furry prostitutes ran over to the dragon and started having sex with it.

"We need someone to speak to it in dragon tongue now. Tell it to leave" StarForce said.  
"Who here would possibly know that?" Element asked.  
"Ok Element seriously you're being a negative nancy right now, just go with the flow and embrace the ridiculousness ok we've all accepted things like this just happen ok" StarForce said.  
"I don't think anyone knows how to speak dragon" Marrowsky said.  
"Oh butterfingers! Ok does anyone have a voice that could emulate it, like perhaps someone who knows that computer voice used in Goanimate videos. A voice like that might suffice" StarForce said.  
"Carz can do it" Jp said.  
"Alright NOOB everyone knows Carz doesn't willingly do things" Eden said.  
"My time has come..." Grenade said.

Grenade stood before the dragon as the furry prostitues were rubbing against it and having sex with it.

"Hello" Grenade said.  
"What is it you desire child?" the dragon asked.  
"About tree fiddy" Grenade replied.  
"Oh butterfingers I didn't bring money, the hookers came to me I didn't ask for this!" the dragon said.

Shinxy went up on the dragon's cock and carved the dick off, making the dragon scream.

"You guys are a bunch of jerks" the dragon cried, holding onto its now neutered private area and flying away.

"I thought that was a girl dragon" Marrowsky said with a puzzled look.  
"It can identify as whatever it wants" Kirby said.

"I'm going to imagine this dragon dildo as Element's cock 3" Shinxy said, hugging it.

A bunch of haikuers threw up.

"That imagine dragons joke was still better than Element's though" Mr. Moogle said.  
"Oh, oh, oh, looks like the dragon's Dick was spiked. Yeah, MLP joke. 5th year brony anniversary today. Made a reference in time. Boom." Mr. Moogle said.

The haikuers all climbed back up to the wall.

"Man, all that and still a challenge to do" Jp said as she dusted herself off.  
"Nope. You guys took too long. DryBones already arrived, nobody was here, he started without you. The challenge was to ring a gong at some place I don't care about, he did it himself" Admin said.  
"What? You didn't even try to get us?" Reu asked.  
"I called twice and gave up. Anyways, DryBones won the challenge for the Troll Slaiyers, Team Jacob loses, go vote somebody off" Admin said.

"We won, Ziggy and I are safe..." Bless said.  
"I've fucked 0 bitches today" Tim said.  
"NIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGER" Shinxy said.  
"And you guys complain about me removing people." Luke said.

The losers were sitting around waiting for the elimination ceremony to begin.

"That was unswastikal" Mike said.  
"We'll get 'em next time, stay positive guys" Lemon encouraged.  
"Lemon this is all your fault you're such a fucking weakling" Sam insulted.

[Lemon in le confession toilet]  
"I mean we all equally did bad, it's not like one person specifically messed up. How am I supposed to know who to vote for?"  
Lemon stamps somebody's passport.  
"That person will do I guess"  
[le end]

[Gingerale in le confession toilet]  
"We must get rid of the weakest link.."  
Gingerale stamps somebody's passport.  
[le end]

[Nicholas in le confession toilet]  
"Execute yourself"  
Nicholas stamps somebody's passport.  
[le end]

[Reu in le confession toilet]  
"Uhhhhhhhhhhhh"  
[le end]

"No one voted for me, right? Please don't vote for me guys, I did nothing wrong!" Isaac pleaded.

"Welcome to the seventh elimination ceremony, or your fourth. Just when you were starting to get back on track, you screwed up again and now your team is below again" Admin spoke.  
"To be fair the circumstances were completely bullshit" Alice defended.  
"Eh, it happens. Anyways, I have 16 freshly cooled Mountain Dew cans ready for you. By wait! That's not enough for everyone! One of you will not receive one, take the drop of shame, be stranded in China, and lose out on 1,000,000 stars" Admin announced.  
"I don't even like soda, I can just give mine to the loser" Luke said.  
"No. I'll drink it. Moving on, the votes tonight are interesting to say the least. The first five save are...StarForce, Nicholas, Riley, Alice, Lukeguy" Admin said, tossing a can to each one.

12 haikuers remained, only 11 would move on.

"Sam, Reu, Blooberri, Mike, Robot" Admin continued, tossing a can to each and putting a smile on their face.

Lemon, Sunnia, Stickboy, J, Berserker, Gingerale, and Isaac were left.

"One of you are going home, guys. However, Lemon, Berserker, and Isaac aren't that one" Admin proclaimed, tossing them a can.

Gingerale, J, Stickboy, and Sunnia were left.

"Who will it be? The ultimate fanboy? The amiibo fanatic? Bloo's friend? Or xXxLaprasFucker420xXx?"

The final four shot each other some looks, J looked petrified, Stickboy was trying to hide is anxiety by looking angry, Gingerale looked concerned, and Sunnia yawned.

"I'll tell you now Jingerale, are both safe" Admin said, handing them both a can of immunity.  
"Nice pun, Admin" Lemon complimented.  
"Thanks, Lemon!" Admin said.  
"So so so Sitckboy or Sunnia...the drop of shame awaits one of you..." Admin said intensely.

Stickboy crossed his arms, looking at Sunnia with narrowed eyes.  
Sunnia looked bored.

"The final Mountain Dew goes to..."  
Stickboy tightened his glasses.  
"S..."  
Sunnia took out a selfie of Bloo.  
"Stickboy!" Admin finished, tossing Stickboy the can and he dropped it like a pleb.  
"Sunnia! You're out my friend!" Admin said.  
"Ok cool, whatever" Sunnia said nonchalantly.

Sunnia got out of her seat and walked towards the door, strapping on a parachute.

"Sunnia, no! My friend! You can't go!" Bloo said, running up to her.  
"It's cool, tell Bless he's a cutie for me though" Sunnia said.  
"Sure thing" Bloo said.

Sunnia looked down at the ground below her.

"I wonder how much blood will come out if I splat" Sunnia said.  
"Goodbye Sun" Bloo sighed, hugging her.  
"If anyone wants some selfies of Bloo just text me" Sunnia said.

Sunnia jumped out of the plane and activated her parachute, slowly descending below.

"Well after a long day of beating up Mexicans I need to go masturbate and get some rest" Riley said, standing up and walking away.

"Hey Mike, I was wondering if you wanted to-" Nicholas began.  
"I'm busy playing Smash with Alice and Lukeguy! Maybe next time Nicholas." Mike said, joining Alice, Lukeguy, and Lemon.

Luke posted.

Alice posted.

Mike posted.

Nicholas sighed.

Reu was standing at the door, watching below as Sunnia fell. The wind blew in his hair and he looked back as his teammates took off for sleep.

[Reu in le confession toilet]  
"We're all going to take that plunge sooner or later. Whether it's all of us, or someone on our team manages to win. We will all fall. But when will I?"  
[le end]

[Riley in le confession toilet]  
"After today I've learned to stop complaining, what happened to me in the past is over with! I should focus on the future and befriend Lukeguy, oh and GenesisFrenzy singing off"  
[le end]

Riley was walking out of the bathroom when Nicholas approached him.

"I've heard you've been kicked form Haikik before." Nicholas said.  
"That's in the past, I'm moving on. They let me back in so it doesn't matter" Riley said, walking away. But Nicholas grabbed him.  
"You don't need them, Riley. And they don't need you. Keep that in mind..." Nicholas said.

Riley watched Nicholas walk into le confession toilet with a puzzled look, then shrugged it off and walked back to the loser section.

"So what the HECK happened today?" Lemon asked.  
"Idk dude! Hopefully Luke starts feeling better" Alice said.

Lukeguy was sitting sectioned off from the rest of his team. Looking out the window and gazing at the night sky, he sighed and took our a bottle of Schorschbrau Schorschbock 57, chugging it down to forget his woes.

In first class, the Troll Slaiyers were enjoying their prize: some Chinese food.

"Oh yeah I love me some authentic Chinese cuisine" Joe said, eating some dick.

"I did pretty good today, the way I battled those Chinese warriors, used the fireworks to distract the pandas, and then correctly guessed the Wheel of Fortune puzzle used a fan to find the bong needed to ring" DryBones said.  
"Who are you talking to?" Marrowsky asked.  
"Oh...I thought someone was listening..." DryBones said.

Marrowksy shrugged and laid back in his seat.

Grenade and Kirby were eating some noodles together.

Bless and Ziggy were eating some wonton soup together. Tim sat next to Bless.

"Ziggy, I brought you a gift." Tim said.  
"Oh what is it?" Ziggy asked.  
"A coconut" Tim said, passing Ziggy a coconut.  
"Wtf is this?" Ziggy asked, holding the coconut up.  
"Bless." Tim said.  
"Hey" Bless replied.  
"I'm dying."  
"No!"  
"I must go. But I shall return. For I am Tim." Tim said, getting up and walking away.

Tim took some of Bless' weed before he walked out of the room.

Pantz was heading down the passageway towards the bathroom, when Tim stopped her.

"Oh, my man Tim. What's going on man?" Pantz asked.  
"A time is coming where you must reawaken your power. Don't forget who you are, Cory..." Tim said, walking away from her.  
"What..." Pantz said.

Meanwhile, down below in an unknown location, Spuro returned to his lair.  
The can of chef boyardee rolled outside.

"They fuckin took my dick. Those assholes took my dick, me, fucking Spyro! I'm going to fucking kill them!" Spyro growled, smacking a pebble across the ground.  
"Calm down, Spyro. Who is it that did this to you?" a hooded person asked.  
"Oh yeah, get this. Those pussies, they have a name you might be interested in. They called themselves the Troll Slaiyers" Spyro said.  
"What...it can't be..." the hooded person said.

The hooded person walked away a bit to collect his thoughts, processing the information before speaking firmly. He took off his hood.

"Find out where they're headed, and call the others. The Troll Slaiyers...the time has come..." Tails said, picking up a picture of him with Sonic, Shadow, and Knuckles.

Back on the plane, Admin and Imboo were flying on the cockpit.

"We're down to 33 haikuers, one of which will be going home with 1,000,000 stars. Will DryBones get grounded? Will StarForce's pimping company stay successful? Who will fall next? Where will we go next? Only way to find out is to keep watching, or to wait until the finale and skip everything. Either way, keep your eye out. This is HAIKU, DRAMA, WORLD TOUR!" Admin signed off.

End of Day 56  
initiation at 18.52%  
6-18-9-5-14-4-19-8-9-16-19 / 2-5-7-9-14 / 20-15 / 3-18-21-13-2-12-5 / 8-1-9-11-21-5-18-19 / 3-15-14-20-9-14-21-5 / 20-15 / 4-18-15-16 / 1-14-20-9-3-9-16-1-20-5 / 20-8-5 / 18-5-20-21-18-14 / 15-6 / 1 / 6-1-13-15-21-19 / 13-1-12-12 / 3-15-16


	8. The Other Guys

Chapter 8: The Other Guys

"Last time on Haiku Drama World Tour, our beloved haikuers-"  
"Parascout what the heck you doing?" Admin interrupted.  
"Just recapping the events of episode 7" Parascout replied.  
"No one said you could do that. That's not your job, that's my job. My job that I don't do. Go back to making vines of Link amiibo falling off a table" Admin commanded.  
"Fine..." Parascout sighed, leaving the cockpit and heading to first class to tend to the haikuers.  
"Gay tbh" Imboo said.  
"I hear that, my man" Admin added.  
"Gay tbh" Imboo said.

Kirby yawned as THEY stretched their arms and opened their eyes.

"Such a beautiful day" Kirby yawned, reclining the seat back.  
"Shit" Carz said.  
"Morning, Kirby" Rydli greeted.  
"Oh, hey Rydli! How do you think you did on the PSATs?" Kirby asked.  
"Uh, what?" Rydli asked, shifting his eyes around.  
"PSATs, I think I did terrible..." Kirby frowned.  
"From last year or something?" Rydli asked.  
"No, earlier this week. Isn't it a nationwide test?" Kirby asked.  
"Look, Kirby, I know you're trying to find current events to talk about but type of thing doesn't particularly work for our kind of scenario" Rydli said.  
"Um. ?. Just asking how the PSATs went?" Kirby asked.  
"Ok but we have been flying on this plane for a couple of months now. How could we have possibly taken them?" Rydli asked.  
"PSATs? Those were dreck. Guessed on half of those" Cloud said, sighing as he slumped into a seat next to Kirby.  
"Ikrrr" Kirby said.  
"Ok am I missing something here? What could have possibly changed between the events of last night and this morning?" Rydli asked.  
"PSATs? Ugh Math section..." Eden sighed.  
"Am I the only one who isn't appalled by this? You literally just woke up today and started talking about a test that we couldn't have possibly taken" Rydli said.

Pseudonym walked by whistling the tune of Parks and Rec.

"Yo Pseudo. Do you know what they're talking about?" Rydli asked.  
"Pfft, why would I care? I already graduated" he said, walking off.

"It's ok though because now we have PSAT MEMES!" Kirby squealed  
"Pantzzzzz" Pantz moaned as she defecated.  
"Yes" Bless said.  
"Hey everyone! Everyone! Something's going on in the mess hall!" DryBones screamed, running around first class waving his arms about.  
"Alright DryBones how much sugar did you eat?" Grenade asked.  
"Shut up Grenade" DryBones replied.  
"DryBones should kill himself" Bless noted.  
"Eh! That kind of language is not appreciated Bless!" DryBones snapped.  
"What's going on in the food room though? I must wallets to the place to learn of the finromarion of which is stored there's?" Kirby said, walking to the mess hall followed by the rest of the Troll Slaiyers.

Team Jacob, the fucking losers, were sitting around in the lower class, 8 on each bench.  
"So, final 33, huh" Isaac said.  
"Isaac, no, you can't use start saying 'oh yeah final whatever we're killin it' after like 5 episodes, that's barely anything. Look at all the people who lost so far, it's mostly been the quietest people or the ones no one care about. Soon enough the votes will start getting serious though" Gingerale replied.  
"Well when that time comes y'all better bring the heat, cause this cook is fired up" Lemon said, to an awkward shot of silence.

[Lemon in le confession toilet]  
"This is what happens when I try to force humor out of nervousness...  
[le end]

"So did I tell you guys about my sexy hitman friend?" J asked everyone.  
"Yes." everybody answered.  
"So his name is Paul. Met him when I I was lurking around at night. He used to kill people but stopped after he had a kid and stuff. Now he reports crime to the police but still does naughty things under the table he's so badass and sexy 3" J said.  
"J how do you manage to find a hitman just hanging around?" Nicholas asked.  
"Idk but this is just like A Million Different Colors! I can be his Kaylin ahehehehshshhsksjahahAhahahahhahAHHAHA HA HA HAVHAVHA HOOOOOO AAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAISSIISS S SUSISU D DEODOOAAAAAAAASR" J screamed in laughter.  
"Anyways, Paul's in jail now...but it's ok I'll text him when he gets out, unless I get too nervous..." J said.  
"What's A Million Different Colors?" Reu asked.  
"Don't ask." Gingerale earned.

J grabbed Reu's hand.

"I'll show you A Million Different Colors." J said to him.  
"Alright then hand retracting activate" Reu said as he pulled his hand away.

"Hey guys somethings is going on in the mess hall" Stickboy said at the door to the place of which was just said.  
"What is it?" Alice asked. Oh yeah.  
"Apparently somebody made some kind of list" Stickboy shrugged and walked back in.

The Jacobs exchanged puzzled looks before joining the Troll Slaiyers in the mess hall.  
On the wall was a piece of paper taped firmly on. They moved around trying to get a peek at the text. Sam swerved through the crowd, knocking everyone down as he made his way to the list and read it aloud.

"Haikuer you would share your problems with?" Sam read.  
"What? Is it like a tier list of some sort?" Cloud asked.

The haikuers read down the list to see who was at top and who was at bottom.

"That's so stupid, I don't need a list to tell me something like that" Element said, but read if anyways.  
"1. Berserker. What is this some sort of ironic stunt?" Element asked pissed off and ran off.  
"Well I don't know about you guys hit I would pour my heart out to Berserker over here" Nicholas said.  
"2. Gluvr? Really OMG!" Gluvr squealed.  
"Of course you'd be on top" Luke rolled his eyes.  
"3. Other. Who the HECK is other?!" Kirby asked.  
"Gee I wonder what other could possibly mean" Pseudonym said.  
"Eden, Mia, Alice, Cameron..." Alice and Eden read down to 7.  
"Whoa people really think I'm a good person to talk with? That's...good to know.." Eden said, smiling and walking away.  
"Hm, not bad. List doesn't mean anything though so I don't really care" Alice shrugged.  
"11." Pantz read  
"Pretty rad. That's like, in the middle. That's like, a metaphor for life, whoa. Ah" Pantz said, walking away.  
"12. Simply Ebin Eric" Ziggy read.  
"14, meh" Element said.  
"16? Oh well, not last" Rydli read.  
"17, alright! My lucky number! That's not my actual lucky number but if I get 17th place in this show I will blame it at this moment" Lemon said.  
"19, Cloud. Well that's not last and I'm terrible at speaking to people so whatever" Cloud read.  
"20-24: Gingerale, Luna, J, Marrowsky, Nicholas" J read.  
"I'm squished between Luna and Marrowsky omg that's so cool! I hope that happens irl" J laughed.  
"Alright J run along now" Gingerale said.  
"La-la-la, la-la, la-la-la" J sang, slipping away.  
"Wow...my number is so...great. Considering my reputation I was expecting to be last" Gingerale said.  
"Yeah well Obviously this was all a joke because I'm actually really Good at talking to people so...this list doesn't even matter..." Nicholas said.

Most haikuers dispersed and went in separate directions, leaving Moogle with a clear path to the list.

"Alright, let's see what kind of role I have in this crazy mess" Mr. Moogle chuckled, placing his finger on the top of the list and tracing it down in search for his name.

With a puzzled look, Moogle repeated the motion. He carefully examined each line to make sure. He scratched his head and continued to reread it before his jaw dropped slightly at the realization: he was not on the list.

"I guess that would put me under the other category then..." Mr. Moogle said to himself quietly.

Moogle walked back towards first class.

"So Moogle heard you're irrelevant" Cloud said as he walked in.  
"If I was irrelevant wouldn't you not hear about it" Mr. Moogle said.  
"No? Fool!" Cloud yelled.  
"It's just a list made for fun, it's not even that significant. There are like 100 haikuers anyways you don't have to remember them all for everything" Mr. Moogle shrugged.  
"Right. You're still irrelevant though" Ziggy taunted.  
"I disagree but okay" Mr. Moogle said.  
"Name three prominent things you've done in the last few months, fun fact you can't" Cloud shot.  
"Haiku meetup, hosted a Smash tourney, college shenanigans." Mr. Moogle shot back.  
"Look look all of this doesn't matter, let's just get back to sharing our PSAT memes and be calm" Kirby said.

[Mr. Moogle in le confession toilet]  
"Ironically me being classified as insignificant is the most significant thing that has happened to me since the team switch"  
[le end]

"Did you know Spanish moss is not Spanish...or moss..." Eden said.  
"ooooo" Kirby said.  
"Middle Eastern people are actually white." Cloud said.  
"Wolf pup" Pantz said.  
"Nigger" Bless said.  
"Haha these memes are timeless" Eden said.  
"I hate my life" Bless said.  
"So, uh, back to the actual game, where do you guys think we're heading next?" Marrowsky asked.  
"I DON'T KNOW MARROWSKY WHY DON'T YOU ASK THE PSAT" Joe screamed said, running off and burying her head in her hands with tears.

"Remember guys, considering last week we let our guard down and lost by complete bullshit, we need to keep in mind the game comes first. We can't get distracted by the locale if it risks missing a challenge, no matter what." Alice said, stamping her fist to her hand, and everyone on the team nodded.

"So this week you guys can just check out the locale and the challenge won't actually start until later in the day. Just stay within this building. Have fun." Admin wished, walking away.

All of the haikuers stood on a double decker street before a large mall.  
Down the street they could see a large tower towering over them, and many buildings dotted around the city.

"Will we actually be alerted of the challenge this time?" Marrowsky asked.  
"Yeah sure idk idc tbh I don't get payed either way. You'll know when it's time." Imboo said.  
"The largest mall in the world...the Dubai Mall" Rydli proclaimed.  
"Guys. Guys. We are obliged to a 6teen parody scene" Blooberri said.

The haikuers walked into the mall and gazed around at the many shops and attractions.

"This is so cool!" Kirby exclaimed.  
"Easy now tiger you've had about 10 lines today give some other people a turn" Pantz said.

"Man, Undertale was such a good game" Reu said.

Reu, Lukeguy, Alice, Stickboy, Riley and Robot were sitting on a water fountain.

"A little out of the blue but okay" Stickboy replied.  
"I loved the final boss fight with -" Robot said.  
"Wait what, what the fuck I haven't played it yet" Stickboy complained.  
"Oh sorry I assumed everyone on the team played it" Robot shrugged.  
"You assumed. Every single person. On the team. Played the game. Within the last few days since we talked." Stickboy said with a tone of subtle frustration.  
"Well geez you can make anything sound bad if you break it down and word it a different way" Robot replied.  
"I love how it makes you regret killing -" Luke said.  
"What the fuck stop spoiling shit I'm actually interested in playing this" Stickboy complained.  
"The whole point of the game is that anyone can die it's not really surprising" Lukeguy defended.  
"Well yes but with the pre-established spoiler now I can expect the final boss has an interesting death" Stickboy said.  
"That's not a big spoiler" Alice shrugged.  
"I love the theme of loving even the cruelest creatures. The game's story is good..." Luke continued.  
"Shut up shut up now I can infer that's connected to the final boss" Stickboy plugged his ears.  
"Dude just leave if you don't want to hear it. Stop acting like we're giving away huge spoilers there's a lot to experience from the game, like the way you - - to -" Alice said.  
"Fuck this" Stickboy left.  
"I don't know games that are really hyped up are usually disappointing to me so I won't be going into it expecting the best game ever" Riley said.  
"Just enjoy the game for what it is don't think about what others are thinking of it" Alice said.  
"Right but if this ends up Melee and starts being called a game descended from the Gods it might just ruin it for me" Riley said.  
"Riley you're a moron. Anyways, my novel has similar motifs about being able to love the unlovable" Luke said.  
"Yeah, it's a good message, anyone and everyone can be loved..." Alice said.

Bless walked by.

"Oh there goes Bless" Alice said.

Lukeguy picked up rock and threw it at Bless.

"Fuck off Bless" Alice shouted, punching him in the gut.  
"Piece of shit" Luke added.

[Stickboy in le confession toilet]  
"I hate spoilers! I'm going to make sure they get their comuppets somehow. I just need to find something to spoil...  
[le end]

Berserker was walking through the aquarium, the tunnel surrounded by waters of fish. Isaac approached him.

"Hey, hey Berserker" Isaac greeted with a smile.  
"Hi." Berserker replied.  
"Well, I've been having some issues lately, and I was wondering if you could help me perhaps? I just need someone to talk to" Isaac explained.  
"Ok." Berserker responded.

Mr. Moogle walked in followed by Eden and Jp.

"Oh look there's Berserker, maybe he can help!" Jp said.  
"You know marine biology has always been a favorite of mine. These fish look pretty neat" Mr. Moogle said, eyeing left and right to see an abundance of fish swarming around the other side of the glass.  
"So Berserker, I was wondering if Stickboy ever talked about me" Jp said.  
"Wait why did you say we if this question was about you?" Eden asked.  
"No." Berserker responded.  
"Alright thanks" Jp smiled, walking away.  
"Hey Eden, if you'd like to talk about something I'm game" Mr. Moogle offered.  
"No thanks, I gotta go wash my dishes" seen said, leaving.

Marrowsky walked by and snapped some pictures of the tunnel.  
Moogle sighed.

"Hey, Moogle. If you want, you can hang out with us" Grenade suggested.  
"Hm?" Moogle asked.

Mr. Moogle was brought to a Lemonbar, and sat a table surrounded by other haikuers.

"Hey Moogs. This is where is irrelevant haikuers hang out together" Grenade said.  
"What? We just got here like 15 minutes ago how have you already established a group hangout spot? And what do you mean irrelevant?" Mr. Moogle asked.  
"Well you see, there are always 'those' haikuers. The ones who never make a poll, or are forgotten when someone mentions something they like about a lot of haikuers, or the ones no one remembers being part of a group. There's Reu, me, Jp, Pseudonym but he doesn't care, and then there's the king of irrelevant: Grenade. We're not important per se, we're just, you know, the other guys" Stickboy explained.  
"It was just one list I'm pretty sure they just forgot, not to brag but I consider myself a pretty prominent member of haiku" Moogle said.  
"That's ok, you'll learn to accept it." Jp said.  
"This is ridiculous. Bless and DryBones weren't on the list" Mr. Moogle protested.  
"Well yeah but everyone remembers them for their notorious deeds" Stickboy said.  
"Look I just think this whole thing is pointless. I'm going to go find Element before he sets himself on fire or breaks the aquarium glass" Mr. Moogle said, getting or of his seat.  
"That's all well and good now, Moogle, but the future is coming for us now. You may be one of the most active users at the time, but how long will that hold true? You've already begun life at college, how much longer before you settle down and start forgetting about us, and we start forgetting about you?" Reu asked.  
"Longer than you think" Moogle responded, walking away.

Nicholas, J, and Gingerale were walking down past some stores.

"So Nicholas, you know Tsutomu from Sakamichi no Apollon?" J asked.  
"Uh, yeah I know exactly what you're talking about J" Nicholas responded in dumb, mocking tone.  
"J do you ever wear shoes?" Gingerale asked.  
"Sandals are life, if weather permitted I'd always wear them!" J replied.

The three walked by Geekay Games, where Luke, Alice, Riley and Mike were playing video games inside.

"Wow this place is swick" Alice said.  
"Ikrrr Krogre" Mike replied.  
"Hey Mike, we were in our way to find Berserker to hang out. You want to join us?" Nicholas asked.  
"Sorry Jiclalssslqp we're playing SMASH!" Mike screamed, stabbing Luke and Alice.  
"FUCK THIS SHITTY GAME I QUIT" Riley raged, throwing his controlled down.

[Alice in le confession toilet]  
"Riley can get a liiiiiiittle worked up over Smash..."  
[le end]

"AAHAHAHHHHHHH" Riley screamed, pulling the tv off the wall and bashing it off Puke's head.

Alice sighed in embarrassment.

"Why don't you come with us, Riley..." Nicholas suggested.  
"Hm?" Riley asked.  
"I mean we should take this opportunity to make some friends, and I bet you'd like to learn more about the haikuers you haven't gotten to know yet..." Nichola said.  
"Riley be careful who you hang out with" Alice warned.  
"Who care" Luke said.  
"You know what I think he's right, I'd like to see for myself what these guys are like" Riley said, dusting himself off even though he didn't have any dust on him, and joining Nicholas, J, and GINGERALE DRAGON!

Rydli was in line at a store with Kirby, Pantz, and Cloud.

"I don't understand anything anyone is saying" Cloud said.  
"Eh, I'm fluent in line seven languages so I dab a bit" Rydli shrugged.  
"What's making this line take so long?" Pantz asked.  
"Yes I'd like to purchase $45 worth of water bottles and cookies" somebody in the front of the line said.  
"?" the man at the register replied.

The man walked by Rydli, Pantz, Cloud, and Kirby carrying $45 worth of water bottles and cookies in his arms.

"Sup" Pantz greeted.  
"Hello! Name's Thad! Nice to meet you!" Thad said, sticking his hand out for a handshake and dropping all of his shit.  
"Nice to meet you, Thad." Rydli replied, putting an emphasis on Thad.  
"Wait, his name is Thad?" Kirby asked, and the three, excluding Rydli, giggled.  
"Well I have a business meeting to get to, adios!" Thad said, taking off.  
"What a guy" Cloud said.  
"Hey Rydli, how much do you think it would cost for Thad to purchase a single cookie?" Kirby asked.  
"75 cents." Rydli answered immediately.  
"What? How'd you figure it out?" Kirby asked.  
"Alright, so you have 21 water bottles and 25 cookies that equal 45 dollars, right? And then a water bottle and a cookie equal 2 dollars together.

From this point on, I'll use x to say water bottle and y for cookies.

We know that since together they equal 2 dollars, x + y = 2. If you subtract the x, you get x = 2 - y. This means a water bottle is the cost of 2 dollars, minus one cookie.

You have 21 water bottles and 25 cookies. 21 * x is 21x, and 25 * y is 25y. Thad spent 45 dollars altogether, so 21x + 25y = 45.

BUT, we know from earlier that x = 2 - y. We can substitute, like so:

21x + 25y = 45  
21(2 - y) + 25y = 45

When you simplify that, you get this:

42 - 21y + 25y = 45  
4y = 3  
y = 3/4

Therefore, a cookie costs 75 cents." Rydli responded.  
"I just checked the price in the cookie box which says 75 cents" Pantz said, pointing to the box.  
"That works too." Rydli said.

Outside the store, a cop stared the group down, jotting down notes on a piece of paper and aligning his sunglasses perfectly. He tightened his apple bottom jeans and took out his walkie talkie, placing it to his mouth and informing another officer.

"Jelly Donut this is Big Dog, we got a breaker breaker code 205. This calls for your jurisdiction." the officer spoke.  
"What is it?" the cop on the other end asked.  
"We got some kids here violating the agreement they signed to not share any information regarding the PSATs." he said.  
"No...I'll deal with them..." Jelly Donut said.  
"Roger that, Jelly Donut. These kids are in for huge trouble..." Big Dog said.

Bless and Ziggy were in a music store checking out some CDs.

"Nice /mu/ recommended albums in here" Bless said.  
"Yeah gonna add them to my hot mixtape" Ziggy said.  
"Wanna do weed" Bless asked.  
"What. You mean smoke weed?" Ziggy asked.  
"Yeah..." Bless replied.

Joe was swimming in a fountain and Carz was screaming at kids with Minion shirts.  
Marrowsky and Shinxy were checking out a dinosaur exhibit.

"Murrowsky do you think Element's cock is as big as a dinosaurs?" Shinxy asked, murring next to him.  
"Yes." Marrowsky answered simply.  
"Hi guys" Element greeted as he walked up.  
"Hey Element" Marrowsky greeted.  
"Element 3" Shinxy purred, latching onto his leg and smothering it with love.  
"NIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGER"  
"Hey! Don't use that kind of language, it's like offensive" DryBones said.  
"DryBones go away" Element commanded.  
"Really? Who else am I supposed to spend time with? Everyone has just been shunning me when can I just have fun with someone?" DryBones asked.  
"DryBones I don't care about your emotional problems" Element said.  
"I got a dry bone right now heh" Shinxy said.

Marrowksy checked his phone.

"Wow it's getting pretty late. Our challenge must be night related, perhaps trying to get rid of all the random people" Marrowksy noted.

Element checked his phone.

"Eh, it's only 6:30" Element said.  
"Element it's 11:30." Marrowsky corrected.  
"What!" Element said.  
"Have you changed the time on your phone to accommodate the changing time zones at all during this trip?" Marrowsky asked.  
"Oh shit I didn't even think of that. I never really cared about any time zone that isn't PST" Element said.  
"DID SOMEBODY SAY PSAT!?" Kirby screamed.  
"Literally no." Element said.  
"Oh that Herminia" Kirby laughed.

J, Nicholas, Riley, GingeraleDragon, and Berserker were sitting at a table outside a McDonald's stand. Nicholas took a bite out of his sandwich before speaking.

"See, Berserker, I noticed you're not the most outgoing person. I think we should make you more of a talkative person, and well to make a conversation lively you just gotta find things to talk about. This is a really good sandwich by the way." Nicholas said as he ate the sandwich.  
"Or you can interrupt with weeb references nobody cares about like J" Gingerale said.  
"Rude" J blushed.  
"So yeah, nice to see you again Berk" Riley smiled.  
"Ok." Berserker replied.

Nicholas was chewing on his sandwich and was admiring the exquisite taste and form.

"Wow this sandwich, this sandwich really is something. It's really got that flavor, oh man..." Nicholas said, munching more.  
"What's the concept of Applebee's?" J asked.  
"What do you mean what's the concept of it" Gingerale asked.  
"Idk, what's the concept of it?" J asked.  
"It's a restaurant that serves bad food, is that what you want answered?" Gingerale asked.  
"Guys you should really try this sandwich, highly recommended. This is delicious" Nicholas said, taking another bite.  
"I want a Halloween whopper so I can make a Shrek poop" Berserker said.  
"Same Berk!" Riley said.  
"But like...the idea of it...what kind of thinking formed the idea? The mere concept of Applebee's..." J asked.  
"It's a restaurant how else do you explain it, it serves food you eat it, am I missing something here?" Gingerale asked.  
"Guys this sandwich is so-so" Nichplas started coughing violently.

Nicholas fell out of his seat as the chicken sandwich got lodged in his throat. He reached for his neck and continued to cough wildly.

"Is Nicholas dying?" J asked.  
"Hold on let me get this on snapchat" Riley said, taking out a phone.

Nicholas coughed up the piece that was stuck in his throat, taking in a breath of relief, hen panted nervously for a few seconds.

"Seriously though, phenomenal sandwich, give it a try" Nicholas recommended.  
"Uh, guys. Is it me or is the mall shutting down?" Riley asked, looking around to see nobody.  
"Yes the gates in front of the stores generally imply they are closing for the night." Berserker replied.  
"The challenge is after hours then?" Gingerale asked.

Riley's phone vibrated.  
He checked it to see a text message from Admin.

"Today's challenge: survive the night inside the mall."

The haikuers scattered around the mall received the text message and were alerted of the challenge.

Alice, Mike, and Lukeguy were in a movie theater.

"Aw man we're gonna miss le movie" Alice said.  
"Unless we roll the film ourselves" Stickboy said, walking up to them.  
"Hm.! Sounds naughty, rebellious...but we should probably regroup" Alice suggested.  
"Come on if someone interrupts us we'll just leave. How often will you have a movie theater to yourself and some friends?" Stickboy asked.  
"If you get a job at a movie theater." Luke replied.  
"Yeah well how often can you do it with INTERNET FRIENDS! Let's do it guys" Alice said.  
"Minty" Mike said.  
"Ok" Luke replied.

And the four walked into the film room to start the movie.

As other haikuers received the messaged, some tried to regroup.

Cloud, Pantz, Rydli, Kirby, Element, Marrowsky, Shinxy, and Pseudonym were together. They were in the aquarium tunnel.

"So, this challenge seems pretty straight forward. Let's stick together and hope for the best" Rydli suggested.  
"Anyone else wondering what might be our obstacle?" Kirby asked.  
"No you are the only one wondering that." Pseudonym replied.  
"Probably zombies or Arabs" Element thought.  
"You know what I think is weird? How easily we got to stay in the mall after hours. Where's security?" Pantz asked.  
"I'm assuming there isn't any, Admin most likely rented the place out for the night just for this challenge" Marrowsky suggested.

Unbeknownst to them, there was but one security guard on duty.  
A certain mall cop wheeled around the mall on his Segway. He took a jelly donut out of his pocket and bit it.

"Safety never takes a holiday and when duty calls, Blart answers." he narrated to himself.

Bless and Ziggy walked out of the music store with some CDs they stole.

"I want to die" Bless said.  
"Umaruun. Where is everyone?" Ziggy asked.  
"Suddenly everyone died except for Ziggy and Bless" Bless said.  
"Whoa what?" Ziggy asked.  
"Hey look it's Carz" Bless pointed.

Carz ran into a fountain and masturbated in it.

"Yo Carz" Ziggy greeted.  
"Dick" Carz replied.  
"We made a good choice choosing to keep Carz over Dausername." Bless said.

Blooberri was walking by, sipping on a slurpee.

"Oh, hey guys" Blooberri said.

"Hey Bloo, you like disappeared" Ziggy noted.  
"Yeah I do that." Bloo said.  
"Yo Bloo you pay for that slurpee dawg?" Bless asked.  
"Of course I did haha...I've learned from my morality class to do things that are morally right." Bloo said.  
"Really? Let's test it. Would you eat somebody else's food?" Ziggy asked.  
"No that morally wrong." Bloo answered.  
"That class is teaching you some good shit" Ziggy said.  
"help" Carz yelled.  
"AAAAAAAAAAAAA ASSSSSSSAS grounded grounded grounded grounded grounded" Carz screamed.

"What's that noise?" Blart asked himself.

He wheeled around the corner and down the path. He gasped as he saw Bless, Ziggy, Blooberri, and Carz by the fountain.

"I'm gonna have to ask you to leave!" Paul screamed, wheeling his Segway toward them but then tripping over a Twinkie and falling off.

Blart struggled to get to his feet and rolled around like a turtle on its back.

"Is that Paul Blart?" Blooberri asked.  
"KillDoge2k14" Carz responded.  
"Save me Ziggy" Bless said.

The four started rubbing as Blart regained himself. He took a long breather and started jogging towards them, struggling to keep up.

"IM HONAN GET OUU" he screamed.  
"The escalators! Let's go up the escalators!" Blooberri said.

They all ran up the escalator.

"Whoa, whoa, guys guys. It's an escalator, no need to rush." Blooberri said, standing still and letting it carry her up.  
"Uh, Ziggy..." Bless said quietly.

Ziggy looked down to notice he took the wrong escalator, it was going downwards.

"Oh shit!" Ziggy screamed.  
"I always wanted to try that but didn't want to be scolded for doing it in public" Bloo said.  
"Ziggy jump over" Bless said.

Blart got to the escalators, taking another breather and eating a donut for energy.  
Blart starting running up Ziggy's escalator where he tackled him.

"Go on without me!" Ziggy screamed.

Blooberri, Carz, and Bless ran up their escalator to get to the second floor of the mall. Ziggy tried to move but Blart held him down by sitting on him. Ziggy reached his hand out in desperation and Bless reached his out as they escaped.

"THEY GOT ZIGGY!" Bless screamed.

Blart gave out a nice stinky fart on Ziggy.

"We gotta keep going!" Blooberri said, and the three ran into a Build a Bear Workshop.

Paul Blart cuffed Ziggy and threw him out of the mall.

"Blart? Blart? Come in, Blart?" someone on Blart's walkie talkie spoke.  
"What is it, Chuck?" Blart asked in a serious tone.  
"Blart, we have word that there are 33 of those fugitives in there. You need to get them out of there, stat. Apparently some of them have disclosed PSAT information and must be punished. These guys are serious, Blart, be careful." Chuck informed.  
"I don't need luck, Chuck. There's never been a breach I couldn't control. I'll take these guys down." Blart said seriously, crushing the talkie in his hands.  
"Oh, oh shi-" Blart checked the walkie talkie to make sure it's ok, but it was broken so he could no longer communicate with Chuck.

Nearby Lemon, Isaac, and Robot were hiding under a bench.

"So we're playing a game of hide and seek all night?" Robot asked.  
"Hey this is a nice diverse set of haikuers. The three of us, pretty neat combination, huh?" Lemon asked.  
"Shut up Lemon" Robot hushed.  
"Wait...lemon...lemonade...we could hide in the lemonbar!" Isaac suggested.  
"Hmm, not a bad idea." Robot thought.  
"Wait, I thought of a naughty idea..." Lemon said nervously.  
"Well what is it?" Robot asked.  
"We could hide in the...girl's bathroom" Lemon said, trying to hold back his giggles.  
"He's a guy, so he wouldn't go in" Lemon pointed out.  
"Lemon you goofball two of us are boys and I'm a robot so I have no gender. Let's go with Isaac's idea" Robot suggested.  
"Yes!" Isaac pumped his fist.  
"I could hear you guys whispering so loudly all the way form the other side." Paul Blart told them.

The three screamed and scrambled out from underneath the bench. Blart threw himself on top of Robot and Isaac, Lemon narrowly avoided him. Lemon was on his butt, back away quickly as Blart held Isaac and Robot down and reached for his cuffs.

"RUN LEMON! HE WON'T FIND YOU IF YOU GO TO THE LEMONBAR!" Isaac screamed.

Lemon glanced around nervously looking for an out, he saw Blart's taser attached to his belt. He reached for it and Zapped Blart. Lemon quickly pulled Isaac out as Blart was twitching form the shock.  
Lemon and Isaac ran away at full speed, taking a sharp turn and running into an equipment shop.

"SUP BROS" Sam shouted.  
"Shhhh!" Lemon and Isaac hushed.  
"WHAT THE FUCK BRO? HAVE YOU BEEN WORKINF ON YOUR CALFS LEMON I AINT SEEINF PROGRESS BITCH" Sam screamed.  
"Sam now's not the time. We gotta-"

Blart tackled Isaac, throwing him into a shelf of Dumbbells, all of the Dumbbells of varying weights fell off and struck Isaac all over.

"Oh, oh crap, I'm, I'm sorry, uh, you ok?" Paul asked, checking Isaac's hand.

He was unconscious, so Blart put the cuffs on him and turned to Sam and Lemon to focus on.

"Sam we gotta go" Lemon grabbed his shirt.

Sam bitch slapped Lemon, knocking him to the ground.

"Not now asshole I'm not stoping until I hit 100 miles on this hoe" Sam said, turning the speed of the treadmill up.  
"I got you now" Blart cracked his neck, which hurt so he grabbed it in pain.

Then his phone rang.

"Hello?" Blart asked, turning away from Sam and Lemon.  
"Peanut Blart and jelly, what what what what's up man?" his ole' pal Pahud asked.  
"Now's not the best time, Pahud, I got a thing going on and need to secure the area" Blart said quietly, trying not to let the others hear.  
"Blart, Blart, we need to chill out sometime man" Pahud said, feeling his nips.  
"Goodbye, Pahud." Blart said, angrily hanging up.

Paul Blart turned around to see Lemon was gone. Sam was still running on the treadmill.  
Blart walked up next to the treadmill and turned the speed up more and more.

"THINK I SOME MITCH WHO CANT EVN TAKE HIS BIFCHH WELL I WRONG NUGvvbb!8))(?" SAM SHOUTED.

Blart turned it up more and more until it reached max speed.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH" Sam roared, running at full speed.

Sam tripped and banged his head off the treadmill. He fell on the mat which tossed him off instantly and whipped him into the shelf of Dumbbells that was sitting behind it. All of the dumbbells fell off and bounced off Sam's bod.

"Ok this gym has way too much dumbbells" Blart said to himself.

Ziggy, Robot, Isaac, and Sam were caught, leaving 29 haikuers roaming around.

Luke, the guy, Alice, the animal, Mike, the llama, and Stickboy, the wild card, were in a large theater by themselves, snacking on popcorn and enjoying a fine film.

"This movie...is dumb..." Lukeguy said.  
"It's not even in English" Alice said.  
"At least the popcorn is tasty!" Mike said, throwing the entire bucket of popcorn into his mouth.  
"Hey guys, wanna know something..." Stickboy asked as he slathered moisturizer on his hands and rubbed them together with a wicked snicker.  
"Not really, I'd appreciate if we keep quiet and just watch the movie." Alice said.  
"At the end...he makes it home." Stickboy said.  
"WHAT" Alice gasped.

Luke threw his bucket of popcorn at Stickboy.  
Mike picked Stickboy up and threw him over the seats to the next row over.

"This blows let's go see Goosebumps instead" Alice said, and she, Luke, and Mike left the theater.

They went to the film room where Alice switched he film to Goosebumps.  
Stickboy, picking popcorn out of his hair, noticed them in the room. He slammed the door shut.

"Hope you like it in there" Stickboy taunted, trying to lock the door, but the entire knob fell off as he grasped it.  
"Uh oh.." He said.  
"What the hecksies!" Mike said.  
"What's going on? Are we locked in?" Alice asked, banging on the door.  
"Uh, guys, it was an accident, I swear. I'll-I'll go look for help, just stay here!" Stickboy said, running off.  
"Right. Stay here. Like we have a choice. Luke said.

Nicholas, J, GingeraleDragon, Riley, and Berserker were wandering on the third floor.  
J looked over and saw Reu walking on the floor below.

"Hey look it's Reu!" J exclaimed.  
"Should we group with him?" Riley asked.  
"Alright, but don't make a lot of noise" Gingerale said.

J leaped off the rail and plopped onto the second floor.

"OH MY GOD...this sandwich is RIDICULOUSLY good!" Nicholas exclaimed, putting another bite in his mouth.

"Uh, hey?" Reu said, helping J off the ground.  
"Ok, ok...aaaaah regretting jumping off that thing...everything hurts..." J groaned.

As Riley, Gingerale, and Nicholas took the stairs down like normal people, Blart was walking by on the first floor. He took a whiff and clenched his eyes.

"I smell evil doers..." He whispered.

"Hey Riley, this place has some rare amiibo. Little Mac, Greninja, and Lucario all on the same shelf. You don't see that very often." Reu said.  
"I have a Greninja amiibo. I like licking it" Gingerale said.  
"Not interested, Reu. Not sure if you heard, but I gave up the amiibo life." Riley said, crossing his arms.  
"Good." Nicholas said.

[Riley in le confession toilet]  
"Yeah, fans of my channel, GenesisFrenzy for those curious, may remember I was involved in the amiibo craze earlier this year. I moved on from that now, though. No more wasting all my money on those stupid things. I made a decent amount of cash selling all the ones I didn't care about, so I got that out of it."  
[le end]

"Riley didn't one of your friends offer to pay you if you picked up an amiibo for him?" Reu asked.  
"Still no, never again Reu. I don't...want to get back into it.." Riley said.  
"Riley all the stores are closed we can steal them" Reu said.  
"Seriously I'm in so much pain" J groaned, laying motionless on the ground.  
"Yeah yeah, weaklie. So Reu, see Lemon, Sam, Isaac, Robot, Blooberri, Luke, Mike, Madorky, or...uh...can't think of the names...you know the rest of them. See any of them?" Gingerale asked.  
"I saw Stickboy hanging out with Alice, Luke, and Mike at the theater" Reu said.  
"Ok well why start out with the least relevant user, you could have said Alice was hanging out with them, or Luke, or someone who is Cool, Mike." Nicholas said.  
"It doesn't matter" Reu said.  
"Sonic reference" J coughed  
"Guess we're up late on a Movie Monday with Luke Ulatowski" Nicholas said as the group checked the store locator and walked towards the theater, leaving J behind.

A man walked up to J, lending him a hand.

"Ugh, thanks.." J said, looking up.  
"J!?" J gasped.  
"Oh wait that's me. Paul!?" J corrected himself.

Nicholas, Gingerale, Riley, and Reu were at the theater.

"HELLO" someone was screaming from the screening room.  
"No need to be so loud, use your indoor voice" Nicholas said.

"Guys? We're stuck in here. It's Alice, Mike, and Luke. You need to get us out of here!" Alice pleaded from behind the door.

"They're locked in, huh? We gotta find a way to get them out." Reu said.  
"Thanks for giving us a rundown of the situation, Reu. I think he easiest way to go about this is to chop the door down with an axe, let's go find a store that might have one" Gingerale said.

"Someone helps us! We just went to see The Martian and Stickboy spilled the ending to us so it's ruined. Even though I saw this movie already so I don't know why this is bothering me, but I'm sure Luke and Mike care so it bothered them" Alice said.  
"I don't care" Luke said.  
"I don't even know what this chiz is" Mike said.  
"So you need to get us out of here! Bring us home!" Alice said, banging on the door.

"We got this, Alice. Just keep making snarky comments every time the camera cuts to you to show how cool you are" Riley yelled.

Nicholas, Gingerale, the other guy and Riley turned around to exit the theater but Paul Blart was waiting for them.

"What did I tell you about indoor voices..." Nicholas said.

Paul Blart rushed at them. Gingerale took his swords out and started swinging them recklessly. Blart ripped his badge off and used it as shield, reflecting the swords back and knocking Gingerale back. Blart swiped a sword from Gingerale and bopped him the butt of it, and to finish him off he took his glasses off and crushed them with his shoes.

"too far man..." Nicholas said.  
"No!" Gingerale said.

Blart cuffed Gingerale and pushed him to the ground.  
Riley, Reu, and Nicholas were running away but Blart took his taser out and aimed it at Nicholas. He shot him and brought Nicholas down. Riley ran into a showing of Attack on Titan Part 2.

"Oh wow this is way too gorey for me" Riley said.

Riley walked out and was immediately bodied by Blert.

"This is my mall. And you won't take it from me." Paul Blart spit on Riley's face.

"Oh no, now he's gonna get me..." Reu said in terror.

Paul Blart carried Riley, Nicholas, and Gingerale out of the theater and towards the exit of the mall, passing by Reu.

"Really?" Reu asked.

"Well this sucks" Gingerale grunted as he was tied up with the other capture haikuers just outside the mall.  
"Man, Alice sure has spending a lot of time with Luke lately...I hope he doesn't say anything they could make her hate me..." Riley said.  
"You know Riley, Luke and Alice weren't always so fond of each other..." Nicholas informed him.  
"What's ya mean?" Riley asked.  
"I remember the days when they even hated each other..." Nicholas said.  
"Really now...so it's like...they had irl character development...online..." Riley said.  
"Listen, Riley, to put this simply, your friendship with Alice could be at stake, and more importantly, she and LUKEGUY have taken Mike away from me. If we can get rid of one of them, we can get our friends back" Nicholas said.  
"What? I don't know, Nicholas, I don't want to do something like that...and I decided I need to stop holding a grudge on Luke...I just need to accept we are incompatible" Riley said.  
"Just hold the offer in mind." Nicholas suggested.

Riley looked to the ground and thought with a worried expression.

Meanwhile, Alice, Luke, and Mike! were still trapped in the room.

"Hey guise, I found a way to communicate with the outside world. I'm using FaceTime -3-" Mike said.  
"In your face...time. Is that the kind of snarky comments they were asking for?" Alice asked.

Meanwhile again, StarForce was playing with himself in a daycare.

"Mm-hm-hm, oh it's a beautiful day~  
My heart's full of sunshine~" StarForce sang to himself as he fondled some balls.  
"AHHHHHHHGGGHHH" Blart screamed at the top of his lungs, driving his Segway full speed into the daycare.

Blart held his arms out and embraced StarForce, who screamed, as Blart collapsed onto him, plunging the two deep into the ball pit. Blart emerged from the pit holding StarForce in his arms.

"IaammamMMakabbssu" StarForce tried to form words.

Blart threw StarForce on the round and drove over him, then back up over him, and repeated the process until he stopped screaming and fell unconscious.

25 haikuers remained un-blarted:  
Lukeguy, Berserker, Reu, J, Stickboy, Mike, Madorky, Lemon, Blooberri, Rydli, Element, Pseudonym, Bless, Carz, Jp, Grenade, Shinxy, Cloud, Joe, Kirby, DryBones, Eden, Marrowsky, Mr. Moogle, Pantz

"Cloud, Pantz, Shinxy, Element, Marrowsky, Pseudonym, Kirby, and the gorgeous Rydli sat hidden in the aquarium of the Dubai Mall, awaiting the danger that awaits of them, awaitingly. They wait for other teammates to show, but to no avail. It's 2 am, and Shinxy's getting sleepy. Can we keep this up all night?" Rydli narrated.

[Cloud in le confession toilet]  
"Eh, not really digging all these Canadians around. So smelly and creepy...always saying dumb she like 'you betcha!'  
[le end]

"Yaaaaaan :3~" Shonxy said, waving his tail as he curled up on Element's lap, rubbing his head against Element's chest. Element sighed and scratched Shinxy's ears.

[Shinxy in le confession toilet]  
"As much as I wanted to fap to Element right then I coooooouldnt :((((. I accidentally cut my dick by fapping too hard the other day so now if I fap it'll huuuuurtt :c"  
[le end]

"The others are probably hiding in their own location. Whatever works for them, our group seems big enough." Pantz shrugged.  
"Yeah, I mean if the entire team gets caught at once we'd lose quickly, right?" Cloud asked.  
"Or put up a fight? I mean what if we aren't dealing with a swarm of enemies, but just one, of a few? Certainly we could take them on with our strength in numbers" Rydli said.  
"Hey I think Joe's calling me...eh..." Pantz said.  
"Oh that Joe, haha..." Cloud said.  
"Pantz? Pantz? Pantz is that you? Pantzcr? Oantzc can you hear mevvv it's Joe Pantzv Pantz bbbbvvl" Joe screamed through the phone.  
"Yes." Pantz replied.  
"Pantz I got you a new pencil for you to draw rib is troll fucking AWEOSME I'm gonna send it to you through Oglala or some ton hahah! Where r u gonna fuck u" Joe said.  
"Where at the-"  
"AahaHhHHHHHHh" Joe screamed.

Everyone heard static coming from Pantz's phone.  
"What..." Cloud was bewildered.  
"Always bet on Blart..." Someone from the other one said, and Joe's muffled screams could be heard.

The person hung up, leaving Pantz and the others stunned.

"B-Blart!?" Cloud asked in shock.  
"Blart?" Rydli asked.  
"Blaaaart!" Kirby exclaimed.  
"You betcha..." Pantz said.  
"GUYS! GUYS! What. The heck. I've been looking everywhere for you, it's like you guys were trying to avoid me!" DryBones said as he walked into the tunnel.

Marrowksy was

"DryBones shut up. Just get down and suck on my wiener." Cloud ordered.  
"omQ!" DryVones screamed.  
"Sh, guys! Do you hear that?" Kirby asked.

They all quieted and the sound of a Segway driving across the ground could be heard. They all started backing up as the shadow of Blart gleamed at the end of the tunnel before Blart himself showed up. Paul gasped at first, surprised at the number of haikuers there.

"Sorry to crash the tea party...but you're about to get blarted." Blart screamed, driving towards the group.  
"Uh, uh..." Element panicked, looking around for something to do.

Element noticed the tank and clenched his first, remembering the time he suckered Cloud. Element tossed his fist at the tank with full force, cracking the glass and shattering it, all the water from the tunnel fame pouring out. The fracking spread to the glass roof and water came pouring in from all sides.  
Marrowsky, jamming to his headphones, was alerted by the crashing water and rushed out of his seat, leaving the tunnel as quickly as he could.  
The others tries to react but were engulfed by the water.  
Blart himself was thrown off his Segway and thrown to the ground by the crushing waves of water. A fish flew into his mouth. A swordfish came swimming towards Element, aiming to strike him, but Shinxy notice it and swam in front of him, where the swordfish stabbed Shinxy instead. Element gasped, which owned his mouth and made him get water in his mouth so he died.  
The water started to even out and level to the ground, the haikuers and Paul Blart laid on the ground, gasping for air as only a foot worth of water remained for them to sit in.

Shinxy, eyes barely open, was panting slowly, one hand, or paw :3, covering his fresh stomach wound, and the other on Element's chest, feeling his slow heartbeat. Shinxy rested his head on Element's neck.

"He needs air" Rydli said, feeling his pulse.  
"Someone will have to give him CPR" Rydli said.

Shinxy licked his lips and moved closer to Element, but Rydli had already placed his mouth to Element's, breathing air into his lungs. Element coughed up some water, regaining consciousness.

"Shinxy, we're gonna need to cover that up. You may have to retreat from the challenge..." Rydli said, inspecting his wound.  
"K! I don't like doing work anyway!" Shinxy said.

Blart stood up, stating down at all the haikuers.

"Blart...Blart..." Cloud said.

Blart reached for his taser.

"Oh shit" Pseudonym exclaimed, getting off the ground.  
"What? What's going on?" Kirby asked, face directly in the water.  
"Hey Element, you dropped this." Shinxy said, putting Element's fedora back on him.

Rydli looked upwards and saw a pipe. He quickly leaped up and latched onto it as Blart dropped his taser, causing all of the water to electrify. Cloud, Pantz, Pseudonym, Element, Shinxy, Joe, and DryBones twitched as their bodies were being fried.

Blart's lower body was being electrocuted but he didn't even flinch. He put on his sunglasses and started gathering all of the haikuers as Rydli escaped to find Marrowksy.

Alice, Luke, and Mike were still in the room.

"On the bright side, we can't lose the challenge if we stay in here all night" Alice said.  
"Very observant, you're almost as smart as me" Luke said.

Mr. Moogle was kicking a can around as he wandered the 4th floor of the mall.

"Hey, hey! Moogle, you fucking cunt!" Stickboy waved to him.  
"What is it, Stickboy?" Moogle ask 🌒 🌖🌗🌘d.  
"So Alice, Luke, and Mike are stuck in a film room, which may or may not be my fault, and we need to help them get out!" Stickboy said.  
"I guess" Mr. Moogle sighed.  
"Guys! Guys!" Reu said, running up to them  
."What is it, Reu?" Moogle ask 🌒 🌖🌗🌘d.  
"I just came from the movie theater, Alice, Luke, and Mike in that order are stuck" Reu explained.  
"Hey I'm in that predicament too!" Stickboy said.  
"Hold on wait, why would I help you guys save your teammates?" Mr. Moogle asked.  
"Uhhhhhhhhh...it will give you a role?" Stickboy suggested.  
"What's that supposed to mean? Do you think I'm desperate enough to have a role in this that I'd help the other team?" Moogle asked.  
"I don't know Moogle, do you see them as opponents or people in need of help?" Reu asked.  
"Look, forget this, I need to find Element before he tries cooking toast with a fork" Mr. Moogle said, walking and bumping into Grenade and Jp.  
"Oh, hey." Moogle greeted.  
"Whoa, whoa, whoa. Guys, the gang's all here, we should have a proper discussion at the group hangout spot." Jp said.

Stickboy, Reu, Mr. Moogle, Grenade, and Jp were at the lemonbar.

"So, guys. How's the irrelevant life?" Jp asked.  
"Come on being meta about this doesn't make it any better" Mr. Moogle protested.  
"Oh good, are you finally accepting it?" Stickboy asked.  
"No! This is ridiculous!" Mr. Moogle slammed his fist on the table.

Eden was running in the foreground as Blart chased her down. Blart pile-drived Eden and threw her in a trash can, then tied the trash bag up and brought her outside.

"I just wanted to talk to Berserker about my problems!" She complained.

Blart walked past them all and surveyed the next area.

"Did he not notice us?" Moogle asked.  
"Yeah we get that reaction a lot." Grenade said.  
"Or he did and just didn't care" Stickboy shrugged.

Mr. Moogle dropped his face on the table.

"Hey look there's something new" Jp said, checking her phone.  
"Whoa someone's developing an app specifically for us to rank haikuers. We rate haikuers on a scale of 1-5 to give them official rates" Jp read.  
"What the hell? Who would use something like that?" Mr. Moogle asked.  
"Looks like two people have already starting using it, Dez and Lukeguy" Jp said.  
"Do you think we're all going to be 2s?" Reu asked.  
"Nah" Grenade said.  
"The app will help help determine the haikuer of the year more easily, and is much more organized than random anon polls" Jp said.  
"Yeah, whatever. I think it's childish. So, uh, do we ever go on adventures or something or do we just sit around here and complain about how irrelevant we are all day?" Mr. Moogle asked.  
"Mostly the latter" Stickboy said.

Paul Blart was patrolling near the front of the mall when he heard some police sirens outside.

"What?" Blart asked, checking outside.  
"Oh God damn it...here to steal my thunder AGAIN..." Paul sighed.

It was the Paw Patrol.

Marshall, Rubble, Chase, Rocky, and Zuma were all there.

"Guys...I got this, you don't need to help..." Paul Blart insisted.  
"Nonsense, Blart. We're always here to save the day!" Chase barked.  
"You guys are such cocky assholes" Blart pinched his eyes.  
"What kind of mission are we on today!" Marshall asked excitedly.  
"Calm down, Marshall, we should stay focused on the task at hand" Zuma insisted.  
"Ruff!" Rocky barked.  
"So, like, does he not talk. Is he a normal dog? Is he retarded? I never got that" Blart asked.  
"I don't know why Rocky stopped talking but it's cute and I love it!" Marshall said, making Rocky blushed.  
"Guys, I got this. Take your dumb little Paw Patrol back to Canada and let me handle this by myself" Blart ordered.  
"No can do, there are about two dozen terrorists still here and we need to find them. We can smell them out with our dog skills!" Rubble said.  
"Screw you guys I want to do this in my ooooown" Blart protested, stomping his feet on the ground in anguish.

16 haikuers remained loafing around:  
Lukeguy, Berserker, Reu, J, Stickboy, Mike, Madorky, Lemon, Blooberri, Rydli, Bless, Carz, Jp, Grenade, Marrowsky, Mr. Moogle

Blooberri, Carz, and Bless were at Build-a-Bear Workshop, looking around at some bears.

"Ziggy might like this bear..." Bless said quietly, looking deep into the eyes of a teddy bear and giving it a tight hug.

Carz saw a stack of Minion plushes. He pushed the button on one of them.

"Banana!" one of them said.  
"No. No! NOOOOOOOOOO! FUUUUUUUUCK MINIOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONS!" Car screamed at the top of his lungs, knocking over the stack of bears and tearing through them with his teeth.

"Heard a noise in this area!" Rubble said.  
"Yeah everyone else did too Rubble you aren't important" Zuma taunted.  
"Zuma! Play nice!" Chase ordered.

The pups ran into Build a Bear Workshop, sniffing around looking for haikuers.  
Blart struggled to keep up, arriving a minute late and staying at the entrance for an extra minute to catch his breath.  
Carz and Blooberri were hiding behind a stack of bears. They slowly crawled around as the pups sniffed on the opposite side.

"Niggers!" Bless said.  
"Ruff?" Rocky barked.  
"CENSOR IT! CENSOR IT!" Chase screamed.  
"WHAT!" Marshall panicked.  
"ahhhh!" Zuma tackled Bless.  
"Hey, my job guys. This is my mall, my job!" Blart complained.

Carz and Blooberri escaped, running as far as they could from Build a Bear Workshop.

Alice, Luke, and Mike were still in the room.

"I'm bored." Alice said.  
"Me too!" Mike replied.  
"Wish we had some kind of source of entertainment for the next two hours" Alice sighed.  
"Guys I think I found vents right abortion us, I mean above" Luke said, pointing up.

The three looked up to see vents for them to climb through.

"Nice, now I feel like Tom Cruise in a Mission Impossible movie" Alice said, clapping her hands together.

The three got in the vents and started climbing through.

Marrowsky was near an electronics store, catching his breath from the run. He held onto the wall as Rydli ran up to him.

"Marrowsky, friend! You ran so fast, almost as fast as a myrmidon!" Rydli exclaimed.  
"Yeah" Marrowsky said.  
"Look, man, we gotta look out for each other." Rydli said, putting his hand on Marrowsky's shoulder.  
"What Do You Mean?" Marrowksy asked..  
"The others, I think they're after us...we must be seen as threats. If we don't stick together, the others might vote us off!" Rydli said.  
"That doesn't seem to be a problem as of yet." Marrowsky replied.  
"Look, just consider it if you feel unsafe. You want someone gone, I could provide a vote" Rydli offered.  
"Not really into alliances right now, Rydli. Let's just focus on the challenge." Marrowsky insisted.  
"Challenge challenge challenge! Why can't we talk about sports or barbecue for a change!" Rydli protested.

[Marrowsky in le confession toilet]  
"I don't really trust Rydli, so I don't intend on doing any business with him.  
[le end]

Lemon noticed Marrowsky and Rydli and approached them.

"You guys get away from Blart too?" Lemon asked.  
"You betcha" Marrowsky replied.  
"Aye." Rydli said,  
"Nice!" Lemon said.

They could hear J from far away in his loud, gay voice.

"Jonah?" Marrowksy questioned.

The three walked towards the noise and came upon J sitting with a slim, muscular man eating a bagel.

"Guys, guys! You won't believe it, Paul is here! He came to vault, guys!" J exclaimed excitedly.  
"Isn't he supposed to be in prison?" Marrowsky asked.  
"He broke out" J explained.  
"Hey, Paul, nice to meet you!" Lemon greeted, giving Paul a handshake, and he crushed Lemon's hand and made him wince.  
"So, Paul, what've you been up to?" Marrowsky askers  
"Shanking cops" Paul said, picking up a wandering squirrel and crashing its neck.  
"Paul, we talked about this. You don't do that anymore" J said, waving his finger at him.  
"He got an anger management coach to keep me in check" J explained.

Paul looked at Rydli with a deadly look.

"So, this guy. The hitman, right?" Rydli asked.  
"Yes as!" J said.  
"Your skull looks well furnished." Paul complimented Rydli.  
"Thanks." Rydli replied.  
"So who's this coach you mentioned?" Marrowsky asked.

Thad walked up carrying $45 worth of cookies and water bottles.

"Yo, guys! Thad here! Cookie and water bottle?" he offered.  
"Oh, Thad!" Lemon blushed, taking a cookie and eating it.  
"Thad? You?" Rydli asked.  
"Oh, hey Rydli!" Thad greeted, offering him a firm handshake.  
"I'm gonna go look for Berk" Lemon said, running off.  
"You want anyone to sleep with the fishes tonight?" Paul asked J.  
"Hey! Hey! Paul! Paaaaaaul! What did we say about that, bud? Let's go for a walk!" Thad insisted.  
"So, if Paul is doing the same as you said he was, he's both helping the cops and working under the table..." Marrowsky thought.  
"Ideally just helping the cops, right Paul?" Thad asked, giving Paul an easygoing slap on the back.  
"The thing I don't get is...what would Paul be doing here...unless he had some business to take care of..." Marrowsky continued.  
"What do you mean, Marrowsky?" J asked.

Paul jumped off the bench and leaped at Marrowksy, who defended punched Paul in his left cheek.

"What!" J exclaimed.  
"IT WAS AN INSIDE JOB!" Rydli shouted, trying to run away.

Paul grabbed a water bottle and threw it at Rydli, striking Rydli's head. Rydli ran straight into the railing, falling over and plummeting four stories.  
Marrowsky tried ruining away but Paul grabbed his switchblade. He attempted to throw it at him but J grabbed his hand, preventing him from doing so.

"Leave Marrowsky alone!" J pleaded.  
"Jonah, these guys are crooks. They've disclosed PSAT information and I need to take them all down." Paul said seriously.  
"But Marrowsky hasn't contributed to any of that!" J complained.  
"Either way he's in the mall after hours and I'm not letting him break anymore laws." Paul said, shoving J away.

Paul started chasing Marrowsky. Marrowsky jumped over food stalls and slid down the escalator slide to the third floor, keeping his speed as he ran through the ice rink. Paul kept his pursuit, close behind. As Marrowsky slid across the ice, Paul slipped and fell on his ice.

"Ahh, stupid Canadians and their hockey skills" Paul yelled.

Marrowsky swiftly skated through the rink, quickly leaving and exiting out. Paul rubbed his butt and collected himself before limping out to continue chasing him. As Marrowsky ran down the platform, he noticed Paul Blart blocking his path.

"WHAT are you doing in my maaaaaaalllll?!" Blart screamed, starting to run toward him.

Marrowsky looked behind him to see Paul catching up. He was cornered by the Pauls. He looked over the railing be saw the pups on the round ground barking loudly.

"GET EM. GET EM" Rubble barked.  
"Shut up Rubble you're such an annoying piece of shit" Zuma growled.

A banner was hanging on over the risking, connecting the space between the two platforms of the floor. As the Pauls closed in on Marrowsky, he jumped over the railing, grabbing onto the banner. The banner deathbed form the railing and Marrowsky swung through the air, hanging onto the banner as it stayed attached to the other side. Below him the pups were barking ferociously. The banner started to slowly rip at the top, so Marrowsky began climbing up.

"Marrowsky!?" Lemon asked in astonishment.

He and Berk saw him climbing up from the second floor.

Ding!

"Really?" Marrowksy asked.

"Oh shit, now we have to sing..." Lemon said.  
"Yes that is typically what we do when we hear that ding sound." Berserker replied.  
"Could do without that attitude, why don't you take your tone to T.J. Maxx and mark it down" Lemon proposed.  
"What's going on!? Why is everyone singing and dancing!?" Marshall panicked.

[Song #10 - Dubai Mall]  
To the tune of the Paw Patrol theme  
All: DUBAI Mall, DUBAI Mall

Berserker: They sure do have it all.

Lemon: Whenever you need something

Marrowsky: 'Round the UAE locale,

J: Just down the street from the Burj Al Arab

Jp: You'll find the finest mall.

Carz: Dining, Theater, Shopping,

Gaming, Art, Bathrooms

All: Yeah! We got it all!

All: DUBAI Mall, DUBAI Mall

Stickboy: Whenever you need some-thing

All: DUBAI Mall, DUBAI Mall

Grenade: They sure do have it all

Blooberri: No store too big

Reu: No tourist too small!

Alice: Dubai Mall, we're having a ball!

Luke: So here we go

All: DUBAI Mall

Mr. Moogle: Whoa-oh-oh-oh

All: DUBAI Mall

Mr. Moogle: Whoa-oh-oh-oh-oh

All: DUBAI Mall!

Mike: *Bark*

[le big finish]

Blart grabbed Grenade and bonked his head with his baton.

"Those fools, they were so busy during their musical number they didn't stop and think they were exposing themselves" Blart said, cuffing Grenade.

MarrOwsky continued climbing upward on the banner as the top teared slowly.

Berserker and Lemon got to the top where the banner was attached to the railing. Berserker went to detach it but J tackled him.

"What are you doing!?" J asked, securing the banner.

"He's on the other team, we can't help him win." Berserker said flatly.

Berserker moved for the banner but J guarded it.

"NOT MY SENPAI!" J defended.

Marrowsky was getting closer to the top, he pulled himself a bit higher. The tear was getting larger.

"J, sometimes you gotta make sacrifices to save yourself...that doesn't sound right. But J, if you put Marrowksy over yourself our teammates won't trust you" Lemon said.

The tear ripped completely and the banner split, Marrowsky started to fall but J gasped and threw himself over the railing, grabbing onto the detached banner Marrowsky was clinging onto. J's feet hung on the railing.

"Grab him" Berserker said.

"Ew no he's wearing sandals I'm not touching those" Lemon said.

J started to slip some more, so Berserker and Lemon each grabbed one of his legs. Marrowsky was still holding on below.

"J, you gotta let go" Lemon pleaded.

"No!" J protested, holding on for dear life.

Marrowsky slipped a bit but quickly regained himself, looking down below while holding onto the banner with one hand.

"Jonah...you should let go" Marrowsky suggested.

"Marrowksy...no..." J said.

"If you don't I will" Marrowsky yelled to him.

"No...muuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhuu" J cried.

"Can we just drop J" Berserker suggested.

"Marrowksy..." J said quietly.

Marrowksy nodded to him. J closed his eyes as he let go of the banner.

Marrowsky fell down below in slow motion, J looked away. Berserker and Lemon gasped. The pups barked silently as Marrowksy fell to them. Marrowsky held his arms out in preparation for his landing. J threw his arm out one last time in desperation. As Marrowsky's coach hat fell is his head, he bounced off the ground floor, striking it so hard he flew back up a few feet and fell back down. His arm dropped to the floor, where Blart cuffed him up. Blart pulled his pants up and dragged Marrowsky out of the mall.

Lemon and Berserker lifted J back up over the railing, laying him on the ground.

"Nice job guys! Another one down, only about 12 terrorists left to find!" Chase barked.

"Yay, we did good!" Marshall said, nudging Zuma and giving him a lick.

"Not in front of the others, Marshall..." Zuma blushed.

"Woof..." Rocky barked.

"You two a couple!" Rubble asked.

"None of your fucking business Rubble oh my god get a life" Zuma screamed.

"You guys do the sex? Like with ass?" Rubble asked.

"And dick!" Marshall said excitedly.

"Marshall that's between us..." Zuma said.

Blart was walking away, looking for the remaining haikuers.

Alice, Luke, and Mike were climbing through the vents. They found an opening and jumped down from it, landing in a bathroom.

"oo nice! I had to poop anyway" Mike said, going in a stall.

"I have to go too..." Luke said.

"There's only one seat you'll have to use the urinal" Alice said, pointing to one.

Luke went over to a urinal and dropped his pants as he did a dookie. Mike closed the door and sat on the toilet seat, humming the Metroid theme. Abruptly, Blart leaped out of the toilet and let out a mighty roar.

"GET OUT. OF MY. MAAAAAAAAAAAAAL!" Blart screamed.

Blart picked up the toilet and knocked if off Mike's head. Barging out of the stall, Alice and Luke glanced over with a stunned look.

"Hold on I'm trying to-" Luke tried to say, but Blart punched him and ripped him off the urinal.

Paul Blart ripped the feces out of the toilet and threw them at Luke, then picked Luke up and drop kicked him, banging him off the wall and leaving his body in a toilet. Blart sniffed around, smelling the poopy air, trying to catch Alice's scent. He looked over to see the bathroom door swinging. He rushed out and charged at full speed as Alice ran away.

"aaAaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH" Blart shouted.

Alice jumped over a newspaper stand. Blart rushed right through it. Alice kept running but slipped over a pile of pee, falling on her back. Blart stood over her, arms folded.

"Blart? Dude...you...you were supposed to be at haikucon as our security guard..." Alice coughed.

"Sorry, I don't have time for such low profile jobs. I have a duty to do, and that's to protect my mall." Blart said.

"Hey! Rocky's pee helped catch the terrorist! Nice job Rocky!" Marshall complimented.

Rocky blushed.

"He peed himself? Rocky needs to be cleaned up, Marshall can you take him to the bathroom" Chase ordered.

"Roger that!" Marshall said, going towards the newspaper stand with Rocky wagging his tail at his side.

"You pups can go home, I can finish this job myself" Blart said.

"No can do, Blart. These terrorists mean serious business. If we let them get away, PSAT scores everywhere will become invalid. In 30 minutes they all need to be rounded up, or the doors will open and they will escape" Chase said.

"Why wouldn't they just leave right now?" Blart asked.

"We have reason to believe they plan on blowing the mall up. They all must be armed with bombs ready to go off." Chase explained.

"Sons of bitches. They wanted to destroy the integrity of the PSAT and then kill themselves so they couldn't get caught.." Blart said.

"Wait a minute, the Paw Patrol? Tony! It's you! Tony! Classic Tony!" Alice laughed.

"DON'T CALL ME CLASSIC TONY!" Zuma screamed.

"Tony?" Chase asked.

"MY NAME IS NOT TONY GET HER OUT OF HERE NOW" Zuma screamed.

"Geez alright..." Chase said, grabbing Alice by the hoodie and dragging her outside

"Hm..." Zuma scoffed.

"So who's left to find?" Rubble asked.

"First of all, stop helping, I can do this myself. Secondly, there's two, a boy and a girl, hooding together, three guys seen around the third floor, and then a bunch of forgettable faces I don't recall seeing" Blart informed.

"Well we GOTTA find them!" RUBble said excitedly.

"I hate you so much Rubble..." Zuma sighed.

Mr. Moogle, Reu, Stickboy, and Jp were wandering around the second floor.

"Man I'm tired. Luckily there's only a half hour left before we win the challenge" Mr. Moogle said, checking his watch.

"Yeah but both teams can't win, right? I mean if there's a tie the Admin might make both teams kick someone off" Jp said.

"Oh well who cares" Stickboy shrugged.

"Yeah true, I wouldn't mind thinning the numbers down faster" Mr. Moogle admitted.

"Didn't you guys say we're the most irrelevant teammates?" Reu asked.

"Yeah, so?" Stickboy asked.

"So if we lose the teams are more likely to vote for a haikuer no one cares about, ie us" Reu said.

Stickboy gasped and dropped his ice cream.

"Well I wouldn't say nobody cares about us..." Mr. Moogle said.

"Whoa look a new list is out!" Jp said, checking her phone.

"Most hated haikuer..." Reu read, looking over at the phone.

"You know maybe I don't mind being irrelevant if it means not having my name plaster over things like that" Mr. Moogle said.

"Lemon's the most hated apparently" Jp read.

"I can see that" Reu nodded.

"Yeah fuck Lemon" Stickboy agreed.

"Gingerale, Rydli, Element, Hammy, Gingerale again..." Jp continued to read.

"Stupid list" Mr. Moogle said.

"And surprise, none of us are on it...wait..." Stickboy said.

"What?" Mr. Moogle asked.

Stickboy showed Moogle the phone.

"You're on here...number 12..." Stickboy said.

"Oh..." Mr. Moogle exclaimed.

"Wait so Moogle isn't really irrelevant?" Reu asked.

"Maybe he's halfblood?" Jp asked.

"Really? Does being on or off the list really decide this kind of position for us?" Moogle asked.

"Stupid Moogle being a fake other" Stickboy said.

"You are the ones who insisted it was me!" Moogle defended.

"You liiiiiiiied!" Stickboy yelled.

"Attention shoppers." someone said.

The four turned to see Blart standing there waiting for them.

"I'm afraid you'll have to leave." Blart said.

"I thought we were too insignificant for him to notice us" Moogle said.

"Moogle's bloated ego must have given us away!" Stickboy said.

"You guys talk very loudly and it shows when nobody else is in the mall" Blart explained.

"W-what do we do?" Reu asked.

They all stood nervously.

"Human shield!" Jp yelled, grabbing Reu and tossing him at Blart.

Moogle, Sticky, and Jp ran away.

"Hey, that white shirt and black tie, I recognize you!" Reu said.

"Really? I know I'm kinda famous, but-" Blart chuckled.

"You're a Mormon right?" Reu asked.

Blart pepper sprayed Reu's eyes and then cuffed him while he was busy screaming.

Moogle, Stickboy, and Jp ran as fast as they could. Once they thought they were far enough, they stopped running to catch some breath.

Near them, J, Lemon, and Berserker were sitting on a carousal.

"Marrowsky..." J sighed, banging his head off the horsie.

"Come on J, let's talk about something that will cheer you up. Marrowksy will be alright, and you still have your teammates. We still have a long trip ahead of us, and if we stick ahead, we can have loads of fun." Lemon said, smiling at J.

"Thanks Lemon, that helped a bit" J said, giving him a halfhearted smile.

"Hey Lemon, what do you want to be when you're older?" J asked.

"Hm? Oh, I don't know. I don't really have any ambition for anything specific really...I think if I keep my expectations low and just stick with a normal job I'll be less disappointed. You know, I guess I don't really had that drive or passion..." Lemon said.

"I bet you'll find something, Lemon" J said optimistically.

"Oh well, better not to have my hopes too high" Lemon shrugged.

[Lemon in le confession toilet]

"Wow...being with Berk really made it easy for my to talk about my feelings. He sure is a swell fella"

[le end]

Blart showed up at the carousal. He jammed it, making it go full speed.

"Asaaaaaaaa" J screamed, clinging on.

"SHREK" Berserker yelled as he was thrown off the carousal and banged off a crane machine.

Lemon and J held hard onto their horses as it spun round and round faster and faster. Blart increased the speed more and it started going so fast it broke down.

"Oh...crap...I'll just say the terrorists did it" Blart said.

Blart ran over toward J and Lemon, who were laying on the ground damaged.

Blart took out his taser and tazed Lem's nips before cuffing him.

He looked at J and readied his taser. Lemon panted heavily from behind Blart, worming around like a fool. Blart went to electrocute J, who blinked, but was stopped by Paul.

Paul held Blart's arm, preventing him from getting to J.

"Leave Jonah alone!" Paul threatened.

"What are you gonna do about it, punk..." Blart whispered to him.

Blart and Paul were face to face. Blart held his taser, Paul his switchblade. J crawled back before getting up and running away. Blart rolled his neck around, Paul cracked his knuckles. They backed up a bit, readying their fists.

"Man, Marshall and Rocky sure are taking awhile..." Zuma said.

"Maybe they had to go number 2!" Rubble said.

"Rubble you retard they went in to clean up not to go, do you ever listen?!" Zuma asked.

"Guys, let's survey the floors and then meet up at the center of the ground floor. Zuma, go alert Rocky and Marshall" Chase ordered, running off.

"Alright" Zuma nodded.

Zuma went to the newspaper stand where Rocky and Marshall were.

"Hey guys, Ch-what the!" Zuma exclaimed.

Rocky had his dick inside Marshall's butthole, humping him and making them both pant excessively.

"WHAT THE FUCK" Zuma screamed.

"Z-Zuma! You weren't supposed to know!" Marshall exclaimed nervously.

"Rawr?" Rocky barked.

"SHUT UP YOU FILTHY WHORE" Zuma growled.

"Don't yell at him, Zuma...I...I love him..." Marshall said.

"What!?" Zuma snarled.

Rocky's ears went down, he whined sadly.

"Chase wants us to meet at the center of the mall...we can discuss this later...and Marshall...we're done..." Zuma said, turning around and walking away.

"Rocky..." Marshall said.

Rocky sighed and walked away too.

Marshall sadly followed behind.

At the center of the mall, Blooberri and Carz were hiding behind a cart.

"The exit, maybe we can dart to it...only 10 minutes until the challenge is over..." Blooberri said.

Moogle, Stickboy, and Jp came running over. They started regaining themselves.

"Look, guys. There's something I should say" Mr. Moogle said.

"There they are!" Chase shouted.

"Everyone to the center!" Chase said into his walkie talkie.

Moogle, Stickboy, and Jp turned to run away but Rubble was behind them. They turned again but Marshall was guarding the east, and Rocky the west. Finally, Zuma leaped off from the second floor, and was growling as he got closer to the three. Jp, Stickboy, and Moogle stood arm and arm, facing in different directions in a triangle-like formation.

"I'm...I'm here too guys..." J said, panting heavily as he ran into the scene, collapsing on the ground.

"Wait...that's...oh my gosh, that's Tony!" Stickboy exclaimed.

"IT'S! NOT! TOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNYYYY!" Zuma screamed, roaring.

"Uh, a little background?" Moogle asked.

"Ok, so...me and Riley used to be in an amiibo chat on Kik. Somebody in that chat who we befriended was also in a Rick and Morty chat, a chat Cameron used. Both Cameron and my friend were in a Bojack Horseman chat, and that's when they met Tony Jefferson..." Stickboy began.

Zuma eyed Stickboy, grinding his teeth and growling under his breath. Chase, Rubble, Marshall, and Rocky looked petrified. Blooberri and Carz watched on from behind the bar.

"Fnaf?" Carz asked.

"Tony...was a pretty weird guy. He used to do pretty crazy things, the type of things we'd make fun of or post screencaps of to make fun of him. He irrationally posted baked pictures of Bojack, and messaged anyone who joined the group, asking if they'd like to wrestle with Bojack naked, or if they are gay. Strange, disturbing things like that, but not in a creepy way, it was in a way that was humorous. But that wasn't it. He also did random things like bring up his grandfather's death out of nowhere, saying it was making him sad, when it happened several years ago. He was shaking "hi" in the chat just about every day, and said "grr" when no one responded. Perhaps the most notorious of his events...was when he said he shared his Kik account with his younger brother. It baffles us, why would he share a Kik account with his brother? His brother supposedly changed his profile picture to A Paw Patrol character, which everyone thought was bizarre. His brother kept changing his icon to Paw Patrol that Tony just got tired of changing it back and chose to keep the pup as his icon, and it became his identity. We would often say "Classic Tony" when he did something weird like that, but he didn't like that. He hated the term "Classic Tony", it angered him so much. He sent so many "grr"s as a result. Eventually he stood up. He added all his Paw Patrol friends in an attempt to the group members from calling him Classic Tony. He and all the other pups were quickly banned from the group. Tony changed his name to Zuma, fully embracing the Paw Patrol identity, and left his life as Tony Jefferson behind." Stickboy explained.

"No one...will ever. Call me. CLASSIC. TONY. AGAIN" Zuma screamed, leaping after Stickboy but Marshall tackled Zuma, pinning him to the ground.

"Zuma! Get ahold of yourself!" Marshall said to him.

"I don't need to hear from you, cheater!" Zuma screamed, pushing Marshall off.

"Woof?" Rocky asked.

"Hey, Zuma, we can forget this. Let's head back to base and have some pizza, we'll forget this thing ever happened..." Rubble said, putting a paw on Zuma's shoulder.

"SHUT UP RUBBLE I HATE YOU" Zuma screamed, punching Rubble.

Zuma took a gun out and shot Rubble in the head. Rubble fell to the ground, lifeless.

"Zuma! Oh my God! Rubble! Rubble!" Chase screamed, running to Rubble's side.

Marshall and Rocky were by his side to, feeling his lifeless corpse. Tears starting coming out of Rocky's eyes.

"Zuma...that was uncalled for...you're...you're gonna have to turn in your badge" Chase ordered, keeping a straightforward face.

"Yeah? Well I'm done taking orders from you, you dumb piece of shit." Zuma said, shooting Chase directly in the neck.

Chase's body fell to the ground, dead.

"To be fair only an idiot would try bossing around somebody with a gun who just killed someone" Moogle said.

"Chase! What the heck? These are my friends you're hurting!" Marshall cried.

"Yeah, well which one am I going to kill next? Can you tell me that?" Zuma asked.

"What!" Marshall replied.

Zuma plopped the gun in Marshall's mouth. Tears formed in his eyes. Marshall closed his eyes as Zuma pulled the trigger. Marshall's body fell to the ground, leaving Zuma and Rocky.

"Er? Err? Awoooo..." Rocky said sadly, backing away.

"You little shit. You just had to take my husband. You always hated me, I always Knew. Well it's time I put an end to you once and for all. See you in hell." Zuma said, shooting Rocky in the left eye.

As Rocky plopped on the ground, Zuma took another shot at his right eye. He then shot Rocky's corpse three more times before dropping the gun and himself. Zuma buried his head under his paws and started crying for his fallen friends.

"What...the...fuck..." Jp said.

"Zuma...Tony...this might not be the best time to tell you this, but...the other Pups never existed..." Stickboy said.

"W-What?" Zuma asked, looking around, nothing was there.

Zuma looked at his own body, where all the holes were present. Covered in blood, Zuma dropped to the ground.

"All along, the other Pups were just Tony himself. He imagined them as actual people, but they were really figments of his dysfunctional mentality...Chase represented his seriousness and leadership...Rubble his naiveness and innocence...Marshall his playfulness and excitement...and Rocky...his retardedness...all along, it was all in his head...Classic Tony...Classic...Classic Tony..." Stickboy said.

Paul the hitman and Paul Blart came falling down from the sky, crashing in front of Stickboy, Jp, and Moogle, throwing punches and slaps at each other.

"Wait, wait, wait. Time out, time out" Blart ordered, standing up

"Hey" Moogle greeted before being punched in the face by Blart.

Blart cuffed Stickboy, Moogle, and Jp, placing them in a wagon and wheeling it towards the exit. While J was still on the ground, Blart cuffed him too. He walked back to Paul the hitman

"Let's finish this." Blart said

Carz and Blooberri, the last two remaining haikuers, started sneaking away as the Paul's were concerned with each other. Paul Blart jumped at Paul, who caught him and tossed him into a taco stand. Blart ate some of the tacos he landed on and charged back at Paul, running his head into him and carrying him to a wall, where he slapped his face left and right. Paul kicked Blart to the ground, then jumped on Blart and starting blowing in his belly button.

"Oh stop that tickles hehe" Blart chuckled.

Blart rolled over and took his taser out. He aimed it at Paul but Paul kicked it out of his hand, then kneed Blart in the face, knocking him to the ground. Paul but one foot on Blart, keeping him pinned to the ground. He reached for his switchblade, then gracefully felt it around Blart's neck.

Carz and Blooberri continued crawling towards the exit.

"dick" Carz said.

They kept crawling, but Blooberri sighed. She dropped her head with a look of sadness. Carz noticed this.

"minions suck. Element faps to e621. Caliou" Carz said.

Carz looked around to make sure no one was watching, and it was just him and Bloo.

"...h-hey Blooberri?" he asked sincerely.

Blooberri stopped crawling and turned around.

"Carz?" she asked.

"Are you ok?" Carz asked

"Yeah, I'm fine...I just kinda miss Sunnia...and I dig don't I guess I feel lonely..." Bloo admitted.

Carz looked down at her. He moved closer and have her a hug. Bloo returned the hug and they both closed their eyes.

"It'll be ok" Carz reassured her.

"Hey Carz...minion hate?" she asked.

Carz smiled.

"Minion hate" he replied.

He stood up and took Bloo's hand, helping her up, and they started walking towards the exit.

Thad was standing by Paul and Paul Blart.

"Paul, Paul, what did we say about this...just let your anger out, we can talk about this...you don't have to go down this throat, look I can give you some cookies and water if it'll make you feel better!" Thad insisted.

Paul out the knife against Blart's neck and held it there for a moment.

"Paul...you don't have to do this...all you need to do...is show a little love..." Thad said.

Paul held the knife to Blart's neck and started sweating. He continued to shake and Blert was crying, his pants stained with shit. Paul retracted the knife, and offered Blart a hand. Surprised, Blart took Paul's hand, and he they both stood on their feet. Paul held the knife in his hand and dropped it, and grabbed Blart, pulling him into a warm embrace. The two shared a nice, passionate hug.

"Hey, Paul..." Blart whispered.

"Yeah, Blart?" Paul whispered back.

"Never mess with Blart." He said, cuffing him.

"What!?" Paul screamed.

Blart pushed Paul to the ground, and then kicked him in the nuts. Blart picked up his taser and tazed Paul's nuts.

"You betrayed the eyes of the law, you abused the system for your own benefit. When I wear this badge, I wear it with dignity. All I want is to protect to people and serve my country, and most of all, I fight to protect my mall. Now you can git out." Paul Blart said, standing over him.

"Tad" Paul asked.

"Thad" Thad corrected.

"Thad. What time is it?" Paul Blart asked.

"5:59" Thad answered.

Blart turned his attention to the door, where Carz and Blooberri were nearing. He looked around and saw it: his Segway sitting against a stand. Blart got on the Segway and started zooming across the floor at full speed, screaming at the top of his lungs. Carz and Blooberri looked back to see Blart chasing them and started running faster. Blart flew past all the trash cans and candy machines and food stands and benches, leaning forward.

"GET OUT. OF MY. MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALllll!" He screamed.

Carz and Bloo were about 200 feet from the door. Carz stopped running, Blooberri didn't even notice for a moment. Then she looked back and witnessed Paul Blart run right into Carz. Blart nailed Carz to the ground, cuffing him. He looked at Blooberri and nodded.

"Carz..." She said to herself, continuing to run.

Blart started running full speed towards Bloo, who was darting to the door.

5:59:55

5:59:56

5:59:57

5:59:58

Blart was only a yard away from Bloo. Blooberri took a leap to the door, and Blart slid across the floor. Admin and Imboo opened the doors from the outsold and Bloo flew out, Blart slid but missed the door by s few feet. He put his hands on the floor and moved himself forward a few more feet.

"Damn it I can never do that right" he said.

"Blooberri made it out uncuffed! Team Jacob wins! Troll Slaiyers you suck! All of you got blarted, you're sending somebody home" Admin proclaimed.

"Wait, so this was all part of some TV show?" Paul Blart asked.

"Yeah. Pretty cool." Admin said.

"So these kids aren't terrorists?" Blart asked.

"Not yet at least" Admin shrugged.

"So it wasn't you kids who were talking about the PSATs. It must have been Paul" Blart said.

Some cops came out of the mall holding Paul and preventing him from escaping.

"It wasn't me! What the fuck would I be doing with PSAT information?" Paul asked as he was carried away.

"Tell it to the judge, poop head" the cop said, nailing him against the roof of a car.

"Jonah! Jonah! Call me while I'm in jail! Paul pleaded as he was thrown in the car.

"Eeeeh I might get too shy" J blushed.

The car drove away.

"Alright Troll Slaiyers, prepare your votes. Cause it's been a long time coming, and the tables turned around, cause of you are going, one of you are going down" Admin sang.

"Alright, alright, I'll vote if it makes you stop singing" Pseudonym complained.

Carz was brought out of the mall. Blooberri looked at him and smiled with a nod. Carz smiled back at her.

"HAIKU COMMUNITY IN A NUTSHELL

Eww FNaF.  
JOHHHHN CENA!  
Smash.  
BURN THE MINIONS IN HELL.  
Reminder that...  
TFW...help" Carz shouted.  
"Classic Carz. Some things never changed" Cloud said.

Blart noticed a cute looming lady cop taking some notes.  
"Hey there" Blart greeted.  
"mahlaan hunak ... kayf turid 'an takhr..." she replied.  
"Uh, yes." Blart said.

She giggled and walked away. Blart gazed at her in wonderment as she crossed the street, but a bus drove by and ran her over.

"Damn it, this always happens when I find someone I like" Blart complained.

The Troll Slaiyers were gathered in the elimination room.

"Interesting results. I appreciate all of your vote." Admin said to them all, reading over the results.

The haikuers exchanged some worried glances. Rydli was in a wheelchair, Marrowksy was covered in bandages, Shinxy's hole was bandaged, most of the others had untreated bruises.

"On this tray, I have 17 Mountain Dew cans. But there are 17 of you. One of these cans are for me because I'm thirsty, so one of you won't receive some dew tonight." Admin proclaimed.

[Bless in le confession toilet]  
"Hm...Shelmet."  
Bless stamped a passport.  
[le end]

[Rydli in le confession toilet]  
Rydli reaches for the stamp but his cast is making his arm too stiff.  
[le end]

[Cloud in le confession toilet]  
"Shrek"  
Cloud stamps a passport.  
[le end]

[Grenade in le confession toilet]  
"Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh Canada's election was today"  
[le end]

"One of your passports has been expired. Whose is if? Find our after the break...of this sentence, it's over now. The first Dew goes to Carz" Admin said, tossing the can to Carz.  
"Dick" Carz replied.  
"Marrowsky, Moogle, you guys are safe-a-rooni" Admin continued, passing them Dews.

Marrowksy and Moogle clanked their Mountain Dews before opening them.

"Kirby! Pantz! Joe! Eden! Jp! Safe!" Admin continued.  
"Eeeee" Kirby jumped around excitedly.  
"Rad" Pantz said, making Cloud blush and hide his affection by lifting his cost over his mouth.  
"Omg Pantz we like, we're safe. Nicholas should make an ironic MV about this moment" Joe said.  
"Ziggy, Grenade. Element, Shinxy" Admin went on.  
"lol Loli" Ziggy said.

Shinxy hugged Element, who pushed him back but blushed a bit.

"DryBones is also safe, nice going buddy. Who's left...hmm oh yeah Pseudonym, you're safe too, whatever"  
"Yay! Another chance at reaching Japan..." DryBones said.  
"Whoo-whee" Pseudonym said unenthusiastically twirling his finger.

Rydli, Cloud, and Bless were left.  
Cloud had a laid back smirk on his face, but looked over to see there were only two Dews left and dropped his smile.  
Rydli watched from his wheelchair with a cool, confident smile.

"I hope I die" Bless said.

"Bless, Rydli, Cloud...one of you are going home..." Admin said.

The camera closed in on Rydli, who kept his calm and collected smile.  
It then panned to Cloud, with an agitated look as he crossed his arms and tried looking unconcerned.  
It panned to Bless who was more interested in the music he was listened to.  
Admin held one can in each hand, and the camera zoomed to the door awaiting the loser.

"The second to last can, goes to Rydli" Admin said, tossing it to Rydli, where it landed on his lap and cooled his penis.

Bless and Cloud were left.

"Wtf?" Cloud asked.  
"Who voted for me?" Cloud asked.  
"In an ironic twist of events, Bless and Cloud both voted for each other, actually!" Admin said.  
"Uh, so you're just going to disclose our private votes like that?" Pantz asked.  
"Relax, one of them is going anyways, what are they gonna do about it?" Admin asked.  
"Anyways, one of you received more votes than the other, and that sad, sad lose taking the drop today is..." Admin said suspenseful.

"s-shrek 2?" Cloud said nervously.  
"Shut up" Bless replied.

The camera focused intensely on Bless and Cloud before Admin have the final can to...

"Cloud." Admin said, giving it to Cloud.  
"Haha! Take that Bless, piece of shit!" Cloud taunted.

Bless didn't move.

"Bless, you lost. You have to go now." Admin said.  
"Nah" Bless replied.  
"Ugh." Admin sighed, walking over and picking him up.  
"I'll miss Ziggy..." Bless said, strapping on the parachute.  
"Bless..." Ziggy said, running up him.  
"Good luck!" Bless said.  
"See ya around Bless. You're a cool friend" Ziggy said.  
"Pfft, no he isn't. Bless has always been a freak" someone said.

Alice walked up.

"So, I did it. I made it farther than Bless. My goal is reached." Alice said, putting her hands on her hips.  
"Kill yourself Madorky" Bless said.  
"Glad he's going" Alice sighed.  
"Come on, he's not that bad...sure he says weird things a lot and tries to be edgy but it's obviously not serious, and if you think about it nobody has ever hurt his feelings here, and I think that's cool. In the end he has woes like the rest of us. You don't have to like him, but I do, and I hope you respect that." Ziggy said.

Alice replied.

Bless walked toward the door. Alice sighed.

"Hey, Bless." Alice said to him.  
"Really Madorky?" Bless asked.

Alice sighed again.

"Kick him! Kick him!" Cloud pleaded.

Alice gave Bless a hug.

"I still hate you, but..goodbye" Alice said, walking back towards first class.

Bless watched everyone and then turned back to the door, jumping out and leaping down. During his descent he took his dick out and started masturbating, or as you may call it, seagulling.

Reu, Stickboy, Grenade, and Jp were sitting around the mess hall. Moogle walked in.

"So Moogle, come to accept yourself as irrelevant?" Stickboy asked.  
"What? I thought we concluded this already, I'm relevant you guys aren't. Also StarForce and Isaac aren't part of this group for some buzzard reason" Moogle said.  
"Nope, turns out there's another list. And you aren't on it..." Jp said.  
"What the hell, who is making all of these dumb lists?" Moogle complained, swiping Jp's phone.  
"What the? Buzzfeed?" Moogle asked.

"16 Haikuers We're Still Rooting For,  
20 Haiku Drama Lines We're Still Laughing At,  
8 Haikuers We Hope Doesn't" Moogle read the titles.  
"Not sure that last one makes any coherent sense but really? Buzzfeed was behind all of these dumb lists? Who cares about Buzzfeed?" Moogle asked.  
"Wow so you're saying we aren't irrelevant" Stickboy said.  
"Look, stop with all the irrelevant stuff. You guys all have friends you talk to, in their eyes you're relevant. I mean you may not be one of the big posters of haiku but don't let that discourage you from posting. Maybe the people we call "irrelevant" are just labeled that because we ourselves don't put in the effort to talk to them and make them feel more part of the community, but also because you aren't offering much for us to show interest in. You guys can become more prominent, just try. I mean look at all the people who left haiku. Most of them are still here they just don't post much because no one seems to care. Instead of complaining about it they should collectively become more active and show they actually care another what each other posts" Moogle said.  
"This is so boring I don't even want to be in this irrelevant group I'm just here because I filled the requirements" Reu said, walking back to first class.  
"Yeah and I was using this as an excuse to hang out with Jp" Stickboy shrugged.  
"Uh, yeah." Grenade said, walking away.  
"Ok, alright then...don't respond to me" Moogle scoffed, walking off.

"Attention everyone, to the mess hall, I'd like to make an announcement!" Admin declared.

The 32 Haikuers were all there, standing side by side as Admin walked in front of them.

"Guys, some bring dawned on me today. A certain haikuer stuck out to me, and he said some nice things that I think we can all take out of. This haikuer has been charismatic, profound, and most all, there. I know it's a little early, but I decided to give the Haikuer of the Year award to this person, for he truly deserves this recognition." Admin announced.

There was some chatter amongst the haikuers.

"Congratulations, Other! You've always been a true friend" Admin deemed, and everyone started clapping as Other walked into the scene.  
"ooh-wee, this is such an honor guys. Ooh, shucks, you shouldn't have" Other blushed, taking the award from Admin.  
"Don't say that Other, you've always been there for us" Pantz said.  
"Oo, just being a pal, y'know? ooh-wee, always happy to give some advice to my 'ol friends from haiku, anything to bring a smile to their face oo" Other continued.  
"Nobody gets me like him..." Nicholas said.  
"Haha, ooh-wee. Ooh, hey Cloud. You feeling okay, Cloudy Cloud? Ooh, we could talk about that deep gapping hole you have inside and the way you fill it with irony to secure your feelings, it's ok to let it out Cloud" Other said.  
"I...I don't have time for this!" Cloud said, running away.  
"ooh" Other replied.

[Kirby in le confession toilet]  
"Well that was one CRAZY night! We may have lost, but it was still fun. Can't wait to see what awaits us next!"  
Kirby gets up as Pantz entered the confession toilet.  
"Oh, sorry. Didn't know this was occupied..." Pantz said, backing away.  
"Nah it's fine" Kirby passed off, giggling.  
Kirby tried squeezing between Pantz to get out but got a little stuck. They locked eyes and started making out. Kirby and Pantz fell on the toilet as they continued to passionately kiss each other.  
[le end]

Back in the Dubai mall, Blart was walking around, looming at the devastation and wreckage. He put his hands on his hips and turned his head.

"I've been waiting for you, Blart." somebody called out.  
"Who's there? God?" Blart asked, taking out his jelly donut.  
"It's me, Paul Blart. I've had my eye on you." the person said, walking slowly towards him.

Paul squinted his eyes to try and make out the shadow as he walked closer, one step at a time.

"There was a plan. To bring together a group, of remarkable people." he spoke to Blart.  
"But...I gotta protect my mall..." Paul insisted.  
"Oh, Blart. This is about a much bigger mall. The whole world can be your mall, and we will be there to protect it." The figure said, his blonde hair began to come to view as he stepped out of the shadows.  
"The whole world..." Blart exclaimed.  
"How would you feel about protecting...the White House?" Johnny asked, he puts his hands in the air and a whipcrack played.

End of Day 64  
Initiation at 21.05%  
1 / 4-21-13-2-1-19-19 / 2-18-15-20-8-5-18 / 13-1-25 / 19-20-9-18 / 21-16 / 19-15-13-5 / 20-18-15-21-2-12-5


	9. How to Catch Your Pokemon (Part 1)

Chapter 9: How to Catch Your Pokémon

"Hey Element, can you go get my waffle out of the toaster oven?" Marrowsky asked.  
"Sure thing" Element said, cheerfully getting up and waking to the kitchen, where the toaster oven was.

Element noticed the oven mitts on the wall, but they were over five feet away, so he ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯ and pulled his shirt sleeves up.

"Haha gonna get my waffle on, lookin' good waffle, gonna give you a nice grab" Element proclaimed.

25 seconds later...

"Element I think you should be tested for retardation" Rydli suggested.  
"HOW STUPID CAN YOU BE?" Jp asked.  
"What the heck were you thinking, man?" Mr. Moogle asked.  
"Retard alert! Retard alert! Uh oh!" Cloud yelled.  
"^" Ziggy said.  
"Alright guys I think I get it" Element said.  
"No, no. Element. You need help." Rydli said.  
"Look I wasn't expecting it to burn my hands it was an accident people make these mistakes all the time!" Element defended himself.  
"Hey I guess this means the homeschooled Shinx buddies are more alike than we thought" Cloud said.

Shinxy was humping the waffle.

"Murrowsky I got yew cpckeaffle redy~" Shinxy said.  
"I'll pass." Marrowsky responded.  
"Come on, don't compare me to Shinxy. Plenty of people would make do that, I was just in a rush I didn't know it would be that hot it was turned off for a bit calm down guys!" Element pleaded.  
"Hey El le mend mag dick is cut and ur hands r burned, mayb I can help U jack off" Shinxy suggested.  
"Please go away" Element asked politely.  
"Face it Element, Shinxy's probably smarter than you" Rydli said.  
"Yeah retard" Cloud agreed.  
"Holy shit! No!" Element yelled.

[Element in le confession toilet]  
"Back to this shit again, just when I was starting to make people think I'm not a bloody idiot, this happens and everyone flips their shit! I'll have to do some redeeming to prove my intelligence. But until then, grr I'm angry. Did I just say grr? What's happening to me!?"  
Element punches the wall and then cries because it hurt his hand.  
[le end]

Lukeguy walked into the kitchen and up to the toaster oven. He had some pizza rolls on there that were done. He looked around but saw no oven mitts so he used his shirt sleeve. Upon attempting to pick the hot pizza rolls up, it burned like hell so he panicked and pulled back quickly, knocking himself into a table and falling into it, waving his head crazily as it burned.

"Ahh, ahh, I just burned myself, ahh, I shouldn't have done that, ahhh..." he muttered quietly to himself.

Lukeguy laid on the table in silence for a few moments. He looked around and no one was there.

"That was really stupid of me..." Lukeguy scolded himself.

The silence continued.  
Luke sighed and walked back to first class.

"Hey Luke. What's with your hand?" Alice asked as he walked in.  
"I used my shirt sleeves to-"  
"NOBODY FUCKING CARES" Sam screamed into Luke's face, then running off.

Stickboy left le confession toilet with some toilet paper in his hand. He hid it under his coat as he casually walked by, Isaac approached him.

"You bring the stuff?" Isaac whispered.  
"All right here" Stickboy said, slowly opening his coat a bit to reveal a peek at the toilet roll.  
"Wait is that Charmin or Scott?" Isaac asked.  
"Uh, Charmin, why?" Stickboy asked.  
"I'm allergic to Charmin so this won't do" Isaac said, walking away.  
"Who the hell is allergic to toilet paper? I have never heard of that" Stickboy complained.

As Team Jacob was enjoying the privileges of first class, Mike was enjoying Pokemon X on his 3DS.

"Krogre!" Mike said as his 3DS exploded.  
"Ok Mike you can cut it out adding exclamation marks at the end of every sentence doesn't make your character more realistic" Nicholas replied.  
"Ok Mike you can cut it out adding exclamation marks at the end of every sentence doesn't make your character more realistic" Mike repeated.  
"Ok Mike you can cut it out adding exclamation marks at the end of every sentence doesn't make your character more realistic" Alice repeated.  
"Ok Mike you can cut it out adding exclamation marks at the end of every sentence doesn't make your character more realistic" Lemon repeated.  
"I like ending sentences with exclamation marks to indicate sarcasm!" Luke replied.

No one responded.

[Lukeguy in le confession toilet]  
"I should go back to saying two lines an episode"  
[le end]

"Wow Mike, don't you think it's a little 2000 and late to be playing that game?" Lemon asked.  
"I know I know!

Riley was siting in front of Shadow cross legged.

"Shadow, I'm sorry I haven't been working on reviews" Riley said.  
"You should be, idiot. How long do you think your fanbase will tolerate a hiatus?" Shadow asked.  
"Whoa whoa Shadow no need to throw names around like that. The Earthbound review should be finished soon, I just need time..." Riley explained.  
"Well stop being a pathetic loser and work on your review while we're not doing challenges are are just sitting here on the plane, moron" Shadow scoffed.  
"Stop judging me!" Riley pleaded, throwing himself at the plush and wrestling with it.

"I have to take a huge dump right now" Isaac said.  
"Then do it" Lemon said.  
"ok" Isaac said, getting out of her seat and walking towards le confessional.

Gingerale was playing Lemon's PS3 on the flat screen.

"Geez this is fun and all but the graphics are shit you need to upgrade bro" Gingerale said.

Admin walked into the first class room.

"Good morning, everyone. How are my winners doing tod-what the heck? Are you playing video games?" Admin asked.  
"No" Gingerale answered.  
"What kind of plane let's you play video games on a flat screen? You guys aren't supposed to have this much" Admin complained.  
"Well if you don't like it, then you can git out" Sam said, pointing towards the door.

Admin opened a window, causing a large force of air to move towards it.  
He threw he TV out of the window where it fell to die, then throwing the PS3 out with it.

"What the heck that was mine" Lemon complained, looking out the window as Admin closed it.  
"Crap I'm gonna have to wait until I get home before I play it again, which could be awhile considering how well I'm doing in this thing" Gingerale said.

"Ahahahahhahahaa yeah oh riiiiiiiiiight" StarForce said, masturbatingly.  
"Hi Robot, Lenon greeted" Lemon greeted.  
"Hey...you..." Robot said with some unfamiliarity.  
"Heard you've been making some nice cool animations. That's pretty Stalin' yo, just wanted to remind you of how valuable of a teammate you are" Lemon smiled.  
"Thanks for kissing my ass, Lemon, but my animations are pretty crap." Robot said.  
"What? Why would you say that?" Lemon asked.

[le flashback]  
Robot is drawing robots in her sketchbook. She flips through the pages to watch the fluid animation of a flip book come to life.

"Hahaha I love animating this is so fun and I'm so passionate for it hahaha" Robot laughs joyously.  
"This is the worst piece of crap I've ever seen you are a terrible artist and an even worse animator and you will never achieve even the brim of your dreams, anyone who hires you will only do so out of pity and you are doomed for a life of misery, disappointment, and tears." Robot's teacher said to her.  
"oh..." Robot replied.

Robot's teacher punched Robot in the face, knocking her out of her seat.  
[le end]

"People have told me. Some criticism is needed to help me improve though, I will be a tolerable animator one day..." Robot said, looking up to the sky.  
"I think you're good at it, Robot. You shouldn't be so hard on yourself" Lemon said, patting her back.  
"Lemon I'm the living definition of being hard on yourself. What do you aspire to be anyway?" Robot asked.  
"I, uh, it, um...anime?" Lemon asked.  
"Is anime real?" Reu asked.  
"I like socks" Alice replied.  
"Did someone say anime? Have you heard of-"  
"No, J. Nobody has! No!" Nicholas screamed.

Meanwhile in the Troll Slaiyers department, the haikikes were having a philosophical discussion about the true nature of man.

"Just finished writing up my idea for Shrek's Smash moveset" Cloud said.  
"Undertale" Ziggy said.  
"Who?" Kirby asked.  
"[something Eden would say]" Eden said.  
"Alright let's just skip over all of this" Element said

"Shrek shrke Shrek Shrek's Shrek shitpost shitpost shitpost quirky irl talk shitpost shitpost Undertale Shrek undertaken Shrek Undertale Shrek Shrek shrke Shrek shitpost Shrek smash smash Undertale smash understand Undertale Undertale Ziggy posting about mu cloud talking about smash Pantz posts selfie immediately saved by Lukeguy shitpost shitpost actual talking no one cares about" the haikikes said.

"Alright it's my part what's up everyone?" Element asked.  
"Hey Element, can you read this?" Rydli asked, handing Element a piece of paper.  
"Uh, no. This is in Russian" Element said, handing the paper back.  
"Element that's German, geez you really are illiterate" Rydli said.  
"Hat the crap? How was I suppose to know that? I'm not fluent in nine different languages like you are" Element shot back.  
"Element is correcto on that one, Ryds" Mr. Moogle said.  
"Haha I can understand that one. Guess I'm smartero than you thinko, Rydlip" Element said.  
"Ok that was painful to listen" Rydli said, walking away.

DryBones was trembling in his seat.

"Something troubling you, DryBones?" Marrowsky asked.  
"No. AHHHHH STOP ASKING ME ABOUT IT" DryBones screamed, running away.

[DryBones in le confession toilet]  
"I...saw two people kiss in the toilet...it wasn't a pretty sight but the toilet looked pretty hot...I don't know the names of the people though, I've only talked to like three people here"  
[le end]

"What the heck! Someone ate my croissant!" Jp screamed.  
"Maybe it was Element, that sneaky little corndog lives croissants" Pseudonym suggested.  
"It couldn't have been me, I was too busy burning myself" Element explained.  
"Dude this has been happening for awhile now, some Sneaky Salomon has been stealing food for weeks" Mr. Moogle said.  
"Maybe it's rodents" Element suggested.  
"Really? Cause the only rodent I see here is you." Cloud said.  
"Ouch, that burned harder than the toaster oven. Not really I just wanted to make that joke" Marrowsky said.  
"Minion hate" Carz said.  
"How is it that Carz went from being one of the most voted for contestants in season one to one nobody cares about?" Pantz asked.  
"Because Carz hate is so 2013, Carz is no harm to anybody" Mr. Moogle explained.  
"Sex" Carz replied.

[Carz in le confession toilet]  
"YES I'm gonna win because everyone is too busy sexing each other HAHAHAHAAHAHA AND I WILL DESTROY ALL MINIONS AND FNAF FANS HAHAHAHAAHAHA help"  
[le end]

"Wait aren't we going to backslash the last person who left?" Jp asked.  
"Jp, Jp, when will you learn. First of all everybody knows and has always known that Bless is a piece of shit and we never shy away from saying that to his face." Cloud explained.

[Cloud in le confession toilet]  
"Again being ironic. Me and Bless have a love hate relationship. No we don't we're not friends. It's an ironic thing"  
[le end]

"Wait what exactly did Bless do?" Pantz ask.  
"Shitpost and be edgy" Eden informed.  
"But, don't you guys shitpost too?" Pantz asked.  
"Shut up Pantz you're trying to paint us in a bad light. You might as well make a subreddit called r/HaikikInAction and only post bad screencaps so idiots who browse it will judge us solely on the 1% of the chat they actually see." Cloud replied.  
"SHUT UP SHUT UP NOBODY CARES I THOUGHT I SAID TO SKIM THIS" Element yelled.

Element skimmed the rest of the conversation until everybody was stepping out of the plane.

"Another location, another challenge to win" Sam said, showing his muscles and leaping off the stairs.  
"Whoa, pretty" Isaac said.  
"I'm gonna be that one guy with his backpack strapped on tightly gazing around at wonder at everything as whimsical music plays" StarForce said, looking around in wonder at trees and a stream of water.  
"This place looks pretty-"  
"No one cares Lukeguy" Gingerale said, knocking Luke off the set of stairs with his duffle bag.  
"This will look nicely on my next video" Riley said, taking a whiff of the air.  
"A little help?" Rydli asked as he fell out of his wheelchair and crashes down the stairs.

The 32 haikuers were all off the plane and grouped up with their respective team as Admin and Imboo walked out wearing jackets. Admin had a blue jacket covering the sides of his black shirt with a red and white cap on, while Imboo had an panthers shirt with a green vest over it. They also wore pants but who the fuck cares about the kind of pants they wore.  
They were all standing in a forest area with some mountains close by, a stream beside them and a large set of trees surrounding them all.

"Welcome to the region of Unova! From Poekemon it's a Pokemon thing we're doing Pokemon this week" Admin announced.  
"You mean Pokémon." Rydli corrected.  
"Ok Rydli nobody likes those people who use overly perfect grammar and ends every sentence with a period" Admin said.  
"Yeah that's a good thing to say in a situation like this" Marrowsky said.  
"This plane must have some very advanced technology to be able to travel to a fictional universe" Pseudonym noted.  
"Pseudonym, really. Really? Pseudonym?" Admin asked.  
"What?" Pseudonym asked.  
"Like, okay. Like, really? Ok? Pseudonym? Ok? Like? Ok? Yeah, ok" Admin said.  
"I'm glad you chose the Best Region to go to, they were in the Best Pokémon games after all...good plot...good plot..." Lukeguy said.  
"Honestly I only chose this region for the PWT, which you will all be competing in, AFTER you catch some Pokémon" Admin explained.

There was some mumble between the contestants.

"Hm! A Pokémon challenge where we catch and battle? Challenge accepted." Joe said, doing the meme face.  
"Ok Joe you don't need to accept the challenge you're obliged to compete regardless. Anyways, we're in a good setup. 16 players on each team, 32 overall. A tournament structure will work fine. Catch whatever you can find, and use it for battle later on." Admin continued.  
"Question, will this fall apart like every other haiku tournament?" Mr. Moogle asked.  
"Hahahahahahahahahahahaha, starred" Element laughed.

Admin picked up a pokeball and threw it at Mr. Moogle, capturing him. The ball fell and bounced off the grassy ground. Shinxy picked it up.

"Shinxy...don't do it..." Grenade said, taking the ball from him.  
"Do what?" Gluvr asked.  
"I want to jizz on Hitler's face" Shinxy said.  
"Lovely" Eden replied.

"MOOGLE DON'T LEAVE ME ALONE WITH THESE PEOPLE" Element pleaded, opening the ball and letting Moogle fall out...boy.  
"Hehehe I'd like to put Element in a ball~" Shinxy murred.  
"That's probably going to happen" Element sighed.

[Nicholas in le confession toilet]  
"Ok, I was hoping we'd go meet Kurtis the Snivy but this is the second best thing. I'm find a Mew and watch Element jack off to it and then I'll make a song about it and then Element will finally have a girlfriend and everyone will be happy"  
[le end]

"Hope I can catch Krogre" Cloud said.  
"Ok Cloud we get it ironic shitposting haha" Element rolled his eyes.  
"Hope I can catch Krogre" Mike said.  
"No comment. Not making me look stupid this time" Element said.

"Everyone take your balls" Admin said, unzipping a bag full of tiny pokeballs  
"Pffffft hahahaha" J laughed, slapping his knee  
"J. That's like one of the most baseless and repeated joke in history" Nicholas said.  
"I know but like, balls, ha...ha..." J said.  
"Murrowsky can you hold my balls for me?" Shinxy asked.  
"Oh no bitch" J said, walking towards Shinxy but being stopped by Sam, who pinned him to the ground and popped on his chest.

The haikuers grabbed all grabbed handfuls of pokeballs, putting them in their pockets for later use.

"Hey, Reu, eh Reu, ehhhh gonna catch some Pokemon ehhhh what are you gonna catch, ehhh Greer guess you could eeee, heh, heh, eheheh guess you could say you, uh, you're gonna eh, eh catch a Reuniclus eh boy ehhsh" Alice said.  
"Most likely" Reu said, shoving his balls deep into his pocket.  
"Alright we need to drop the balls jokes, they simply aren't funny" Stickboy said.  
"I was just putting them in my pocket..." Reu defended.  
"No Stickboy it's ok they're intentionally unfunny so that's what makes it funny" Alice said.  
"What" Stickboy asked.  
"The joke is that it is so unfunny that we're laughing about how lame it is" Alice said.  
"o...k...still not seeing the humor here" Stickboy said.  
"Yeah that's the joke" Alice brushed off.  
"Let's catch some Pokemoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo-" Joe screamed at the top of her longs endlessly.  
"This isn't going anywhere let's just start now" Marrowsky said, and everyone went off in different directions.

J walked towards Marrowsky but was grabbed by Gingerale.

"Focus, J" Gingerale ordered.  
"I got this. Pokémon is like, my life..." J said.

Isaac walked to the river and tried jumping in, but he was blocked by an invisible force field on the edge, preventing him from moving any further.

"What the..." Isaac said.  
"Pfft, noob" J rolled his eyes.  
"Hey J, nice terminology. Why don't you bring that back to 2011 and keep it there" Lemon said.  
"Lemon how would I travel back in time? Hello, use your brain. Wait, I can. I just need a Celebi, a Dialga, or a lot of meth" J said, pacing around.

"Need some help, bro!" Sam asked Isaac.  
"Not really I was just-" Isaac started.

Sam picked Isaac up and threw him at the river, but he bounced off the invisible wall and fell on the ground.

"Shit." Sam said.

"Hey, Admin bro. Aren't we supposed to have some starter Pokémon to help us out?" Ziggy asked.  
"No. Because the last time every contestant got a starter Pokemon the Pokemon rebelled and tried to kill everyone. Also because I don't have them." Admin explained.  
"Right. Radical..." Ziggy said.

Blooberri was in a dark forest area. She saw some wiggling from the grass. She took her Pokeball out and enlarged it with the press of a button. It leaped out at her and Blooberri tossed the ball, the Pokemon shrieked and turned into a white light as it was cast into the ball, falling to the ground. It wiggles three times before stopping, with a star clicking off of it.

"Wow, awesome! What is it?" Blooberri asked, calling it out.

It was a ?!

"Wait, what is it?" Blooberri asked.  
"Sorry, sorry, forgot to give you all Pokedexes. Without these you can't tell what a Pokemon is and its name just stays as a question mark" Imboo said, walking into a tree.  
"Imboo, open your eyes" Blooberri suggested.  
"I can't Admin told me to keep my eyes closed to be more like Brock" Imboo explained, walking into another tree.

Blooberri took a Pokedex out of Imboo's hand.

"Froakie" it said to her.  
"Wow Bloo just caught herself a nifty Pokemon. Well, time to lose the game and never get past the first area" Blooberri whistled, trotting along with Froakie.

"God damn it I can't find any wild Pokemon" Cloud stomped.  
"That's because you're not in the tall grass. That's just normal grass. Notice the darker colored, two inch elevated patch over here" Grenade explained.  
"Oh...thanks Grenade. Now I'm going to catch a Rayquaza and kill everyone" Cloud said, tripping over a rock and landing on an Oddish.  
"Oh shit an Oddish! This will be awesome!" Cloud said, slamming the Pokeball off the Oddish's head and capturing it.  
"Hmm. Who should I catch" GRENDE thought to himself.  
"Qwilfish, Maractus, Finneon" Cloud replied.  
"Hmm. Maybe I will" Grenade said, walking away.

He noticed Kirby and walked up to them.

"Hey Gluvr, any luck with the Pokemon yet?" Grenade asked.  
"Yes!?/$726/77-&-!-!-!-!-!-!-!-!-!-!-!-!-!-!-!-!-!-!-!-!-! Caught Buneary." Kirby said.

The Buneary punched Grenade in the dick.

"Cool. I'm gonna go catch a Qwilfish" Grenade said.  
"Cool I don't know what that is but it sounds fun! Good luck" Kirby said, and Grenade walked off again.

[Grenade in le confession toilet]  
"Gluvr is...cool..."  
[le end]

Element was hunting for the PokÉmon in the tall grass when a Shinx showed up.

"Oh yea!" Element said, throwing his ball at the Shinx to catch it, but it was knocked away but somebody else's ball.

The Shinx was caught.

"Who the FUCK just caught my Shinx?" Element asked.  
"a" Element said.  
"Really Shinxy! Ugh now I have to catch another one" Element complained.  
"Maybe not, look!" Shinxy said, and there was an egg next to the Shinx.  
"Wow, nice. A little biking around, find a Pokemon with flame body, and-" Element began as Shinxy picked the egg up and throws it forcefully to the ground, where it broke and a Shinx emerged.

Element room his fedora off and placed it on his Shinx.

"You're gonna go far, Shinx" Element said to it, placing a hand on its back.

Shinxy's Shinx leaped upon Element's Shinx and started humping it furiously. Element's Shinx took it and moaned as Shinxy's Shinx thrusted harder with each passing second.

"WHY" Element said, falling to his knees.

Shinxy's hand slowly reached towards his penis.

"No!" Element slapped Shinny's hand.

Nicholas walked by.

"Element don't have sex with that Shinx you're gonna need that energy for Mew later" Nicholas said.  
"Come on Nicholas I wouldn't actually fuck a Shinx that's like fucking a kitten." Element said.  
"Alright Reddit username SHINX_FUCKER" Nicholas said.

Shinxy started crouching close to the Shinxes.

"Shinxy! No! Don't fuck those innocent Pokemon!" Nicholas said, slapping Shinxy's hand.

"I'm gonna find that Mew...I'm coming for you...and Element's destiny will be complete..." Nicholas said with the wind blowing behind him.

The beat of a song started to form.

"What, what are we doing, a song? Are we doing a song? Am I supposed to dance or something?" Element asked.

[Song #11 - Mew Fucker]  
Nicholas: Sitting on my ass all day  
Open e621, to get away  
From this world around me, so I can, finally  
Keep my hormones at baaaaaay

He's a  
Mew fucker  
Mew, Mew fucker  
Mew fucker  
Mew, Mew fucker

Watch out if you know what's good for you  
'Cause he's, coming for that Mew

Element: Let's set things straight  
It wasn't like that  
It was anthro, mate  
And didn't look like a cat  
It had that look in its eye, I couldn't resist  
It was calling for me, so I formed a fiiiist

Nicholas: He's a  
Mew fucker  
Mew, Mew fucker  
Shinxy: Mew fucker  
Mew, Mew fucker

Nicholas: He'll fuck you until you splurt out goo  
'Cause he's, waiting for that Mew

Shinxy: Jacking off, nine times a day  
Victini, Glaceon, Luxray  
NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER  
When he sees dat Mew his penis grows bigger

Nicholas and Shinxy: He's a  
Mew fucker  
Mew, Mew fucker  
Mew fucker  
Mew, Mew fucker

Nicholas, Shinxy, and Element:  
Mew fucker  
Mew, Mew fucker  
Mew fucker  
Mew, Mew fucker

-  
Element: Wait why am I joining this

Element: Actually, I'm really a  
SHINX_FUCKER  
SHINX_SHINX_FUCKER  
SHINX_FUCKER  
SHINX_SHINX_FUCKER

-  
A woman and her child are watching from the distance.  
Child: Mommy what are those singing about?  
Mother: Go inside, go inside!

Nicholas and Shinxy:  
MEW fucker!  
Mew, Mew fucker!

Element:  
SHINX_FUCKER!  
SHINX_SHINX_FUCKER!

Nicholas: Sorry Elemend, but it's Mew that makes you Muk  
Shinxy: Is there any Pokémon, Element doesn't fuck?

Element: LIKE I SAID  
SHINX IS WHAT I FUCK  
actually I don't, that's gross. Guess that does make me a-

Nicholas, Shinxy, and Element:  
MEW FUCKER  
MEW, MEW FUCKER  
MEW FUCKER  
MEW, MEW FUCKER

Nicholas: Hiding out, being that truck  
You'll find Mew, giving Element some suck

Nicholas, Shinxy, and Element:  
MEW FUCKER  
MEW, MEW FUCKER  
MEW FUCKER  
MEW, MEW FUCKER  
MEW FUCKER  
MEW, MEW FUCKER  
MEW FUCKER  
MEW, MEW FUCKER

Nicholas: 'Still waiting for my Mew  
[le big finish]

Nicholas walked off to find his Mew.

"That was actually pretty fun" Element said.  
"a  
Hdis  
Suso  
SUSISU  
Ew  
wee  
E  
Si" Shinxy replied.

Lukeguy walked out from behind a tree, revealing himself.

"Element, Element, Element." Lukeguy said.

Shinxy hissed.

"Settle down Shinxy." Element said.  
"Always the center of attention, always up to something stupid, starting controversy, and befriending the people who used to belittle you." Luke said.  
"Come on Luke I never did anything to you, leave me be" Element said, turning his back.  
"That's just it, Element. It's always been about them, never me. We have a connection, Element. I always admired you. Unlike the others on haiku we could relate to each other because we were both homeschooled. You're the anti-me. They used to insult and anger you, and now you're friends with them? Don't you ever wonder why you accepted them as friends?" Luke asked.  
"We just are, Lukeguy. I don't need someone so spiteful to tell me not to hang out with people who make fun of me. Relationships change, we joke around, it's just what friends do. Now go back to shitposting" Element said, walking away.  
"I'm not a shitposter!" Luke screamed, banging his head off a tree, causing the tree to snap and fall of the ground.  
"I. Am. A reviewer. And you know what I give you Element? A 0/5. You're just a close-minded sheep" Luke snapped.  
"Maybe this is why nobody cares about what you say Lukeguy, just shut up! Shut up shut up shut up! Stop talking like you're a person you freak!" Element yelled, placing his head in his hands.

Shinxy tugged Element's shirt and they started walking away from Luke together.

"The world needs a critic, Element. It's my job to gather negative feedback. But it's not about what people think of me, it's about the things I say. As bad of a reputation I might end up receiving, only the words I leave will truly matter. After all, you're all just a bunch of people over the Internet. None of you were ever a real friend" Luke said.

"What a dick" Element said to Shinxy.  
"NIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGER" Shinxy replied.  
"Can't believe he would kick you" Element said.  
"a  
du  
Asa  
see  
e  
rrrr" Shinxy continued.  
"You did nothing wrong" Element said.  
"porn porn porn porn porn porn Shinx dick" Shinxy replied.  
"They just do the same thing you did. Probably. Maybe. I haven't been there in awhile I'll just believe whatever I hear" Element said.

Moogle had a notebook and pen out, taking notes on the Pokemon in the tall grass. Marrowksy was beside him.

"How is it that we can't see the Pokemon hiding under grass that's about two feet long?" Marrowsky asked.  
"Who cares. Oh, I got a bite!" Moogle said, reeling in two Pokemon. They were both Dratini.  
"Whoa, amazing!" Moogle said.  
"Wait I thought we were looking at the grass why did we suddenly switch to the lake?" Marrowsky asked.  
"Whatever whatever that was the joke" Moogle brushed off.  
"What?" Marrowksy asked.  
"That was the joke it was intentionally stupid whatever let me study these pokes" Moogle said, picking the Dratini up and examining them.  
"Well, that might be the joke, I guess. But the way you said it almost felt like you made a mistake and didn't want to look stupid so you said it was purposely done as a joke to save yourself from humiliation" Marrowksy said.  
"Yeah yeah that's the actual joke it was a buildup to that it was all one big joke" Moogle said.  
"You're doing it again is this going to be a running gag or something?" Marrowsky asked.  
"Alright this one has higher speed" Moogle said, picking the other Dratini up and ripping it in half before throwing it back into the water.  
"Thanks, I wasn't going to ask if I could have it." Marrowsky replied sarcastically.  
"Oh, sorry man. What Pokémon do you like, anyways? You a Steel type of guy?" Marrowsky asked.  
"Yeah I have a specific type of Pokémon I like to catch that would definitely give me an advantage in battle" Marrowsky said back.  
"A simple no would have sufficed" Moogle said.  
"Let's just catch a Lucario all furries like Lucario" Moogle suggested.  
"Why don't we catch you a Ponyta all bronies want ponies right?" Marrowksy asked.  
"Ok, Marrowsky, ok. Ok. Ok? Ok. Could do without the attitude" Moogle said.

[Mr. Moogle in le confession toilet]  
"Marrowsky is like, my eighth best friend, so it's great to spend some time with him. We're both sexy.  
[le end]

Rydli wheeled up.

"Hey friends" Rydli greeted.  
"Hey Rydli, catch any Pokémon?" Moogle asked.  
"Only the best, but you'll see soon enough" Rydli said.  
"Anyways, we haven't hung out much since you joined the team. The three of us, a pretty smart trio, huh?" Rydli suggested.

Lukeguy popped up from behind some bushes, pushing his glasses up.

"Actually, I see Marrowsky more of a Rydli 0.5. Also Rydli and Moogle, I've noticed your trends playing Katawa shoujo, lots of tumblr memes. My favorite is Rin." Lukeguy said.

They all ignored him and walked away, Marrowsky, distancing himself from Moogle and Rydli.

J was in a field frolicking around.

"Aha!" J laughed.

J threw a rock at a Cyndaquil.

"Aha!" J laughed, throwing a Pokeball.

"Aha!" J laughed, picking the Cyndaquil up and dancing with it.

"You're gonna be named Marrowsky, aha!" J laughed.

A Totodile walked by and J threw Marrowsky at it. The Totodile beat the crap out of it and J threw a Pokeball at it in the midst of the fight.

"Aha! Welcome to the team, Cameron!" J laughed.

A Chikorita walked by and Marrowsky punched it in the eye.

"Aha! Now we have Luna! Aha!" J laughed excitedly.  
"Come on our everyone! Aha!" J laughed, throwing his balls to the ground, where Totodile and Chikorita came out.  
"alright, all we need now is a rival" J said to his team.  
"You!" Someone screamed.  
"Hey!" J said.

The trainer ran up to J and punched him to the ground.

"Our eyes have met we shall do battle!" he said.  
"Alright cool Luna use tackle" J ordered.

Te Chikorita wobbled over and fainted.

"Shoot this guys is though. Outta my way I don't like you" he said, bumping deliberately into J.  
"Wait! You didn't tell me your name!" J said as the guy walked away.  
"...you can call me ?" the young man told him.  
"A rivalry is born." J said, tightening his hat.

Another trainer came galloping up to J.

"Teehee~ do you like pokeeeeeeemaaaaaan?" he asked.  
"Yeah!" J said.  
"Teehee let's be rivals 3 I'll be tough to beat! Teehee see you later bestie~" he said, galloping away.  
"That was exciting, aha" J laughed as his Totodile started gnawing on Chikorita.

"Hey Lemon. I herd you liek mudkipz" Alice said as she, Riley, and Lemon were walking through a forest.  
"Oh man, you didn't see my Flipnote profile from 2010 did you..." Lemon asked nervously.  
"What, no. It's not that specific of a joke." Alice said.  
"Oh, cool." Lemon said.

A Mudkip poked its head out of the water and jumped at Lemon. Lemon put his arms out nervously as it latched on to them. It started nudging his hands and Lemon smiled, taking a Pokeball out to claim it, then immediately letting it out to walk with him.

"Man, this brings me back. Mudkip was my first Pokemon way back..." Lemon reminisced.  
"Hm. Lemon that's pretty hot. So does anybody on haiku know you from your Flipnote days?" Riley asked.  
"Just Cam." Lemon said.  
"Oh, Cam...so anyways, I caught a Geodude" Riley said.  
"Riley I think that's just a regular rock" Alice said.  
"Trust me, it's a Geodude" Riley said.  
"Oh that reminds me, I can put one of these Pokemon on my Pokewalker and then carry it with me wherever I go" Riley exclaimed.  
"But these are actual Pokemon that can walk beside us" Alice said.  
"Alice. Ok. Ok? Like, ok. Ok? Ok. Like, alright?" Riley replied.

There was some rustling from the grass. Riley readied his balls for the incoming Pokemon.

"Eevee!" the Pokemon exclaimed, jumping at Lemon.

"Lick, lick, lick my balls Eevee" Riley said, bonking it off the head with his Pokeball and capturing it.

He then took his Pokewalker out and a narrow red light connected the distance between the Eevee and the walker. The Eevee successfully was on Riley's Pokewalker, crying and banging off the walls to get our.

"Cool! Now let's find more" Riley said, and Alice and Lemon followed him to wherever he went.

Robot, Reu, and Stickboy came upon a small village surrounded by tall grass.

"Hey guys, let's-, ah let's m-a check this place out heh?" Stickboy suggested.

[Stickboy in le confession toilet]  
"If amiibo were allowed, I'd already have a team of six Pokemon. Because I have every amiibo. Except Mewtwo actually but uh oh ...!9 this can't be"  
[le end]

"HELP" somebody screamed.

Reu, Stickboy, and Robot walked up to the man waving his hand in the air.

"Please, please. We've been closed off from civilization for 10 years! All of the hospitals and food markets are in the next town over, but we can't get to them because of the tall grass! You need to help us!" he pleaded, grabbing onto Robot.  
"Wow get a Pokemon scrub" Stickboy said.

Reu, Stickboy, and Robot continued walking away from the village as a Tornadus came flying down and ate the man.

"My robot Pokemon will do great! Or terribly because I'm bad at everything...oh no I made myself down again..." Robot sighed.  
"Hey look, a Ducklette" Stickboy exclaimed.  
"Wow, what an iconic Pokemon" Reu said.  
"Pokémon" Stickboy corrected.

Stickboy threw a rock at the Ducklette and it fell to the ground, fading through it and disappearing.

"What the, it disappeared..." Stickboy said.  
"You fool! Everyone knows you can't capture a fainted Pokémon" Robot said, smacking him off the head.

Reu saw a shadowy figure in the distance, scaling the nearby mountain. He glanced over at Robot and Stickboy, who were occupied with each other, and started walking towards the figure he saw.  
There was a ramp, like formation in the dirt leading up the mountain. Reu trudged along the path until he came to the figure, standing at the edge of a cliff and staring off at the distance. A sea of trees were in front of them, with some towns to be seen on the horizon. The figure was covered in all black, with a black mask covering his face, black gloves, and a black cape.

"Who are you?" Reu asked him.  
"Wouldn't telling you defeat the purpose of the costume?" he asked back nonchalantly, not turning his head.  
"Well, you kinda look like a Star Wars character. I was hoping you'd be Caesar or something. Haven't seen him in awhile" Reu said.  
"Enjoy this trip while you can, Reu, because as soon as you get eliminated you will never see any of these people again."  
"What? What's that suppose to mean?" Reu asked.  
"Exactly what I said, idiot. When it's over, it's over" the man said, and he leaned forward, falling face forward off the cliff.

Reu ran to the edge and looked over, but he didn't see his body anywhere in sight. Reu took a Pokeball out of his pocket and looked at it before clenching his fist and walking back down the mountain path.

The other haikuers were getting down to work.  
J's Cyndaquil evolved into Quilava, joining his Bayleef and Croconaw.  
Lemon's Mudkip fought Alice's Eevee for practice, tackling is and making Eevee cry.  
Could caught a Shellder and looked around to make sure no one was watching as he unzipped his pants.  
Moogle's Dragonair was practicing fighting his Goomy.

"Wow team practice is surprisingly efficient, why don't the games allow this?" he asked.

Ziggy was teaching his Sylveon how to use 4chan.  
Shinxy caught a Sentret. He started moving closely to the Sentret with his dick out before being stopped by Element.  
Marrowsky's Riolu was beating up a Fennekin before Marrowsky threw a ball at it and caught it. Marrowsky gave his Riolu a fist bump.  
CARZ screamed at a banana and caught a Loudred where he began to have sex wth it.  
Lukeguy was spanking his mankey to make it obey him.

"Hey, hey Pantz!" Joe greeted.  
"Oh, Joe. Sup, bro. You were so unimportant in the last episode I almost forgot you existed" Pantz said.  
"Yo, my man. This challenge has got me STOKED. Got my Piplup already ready, and we're gonna kick some ASS" Joe said.  
"Piplup!" Piplup agreed.  
"Haha that's cool man. I caught a Smeargle, whatever that is" Pantz said.  
"Hello? Guys? Where am I?" a blindfolded Imboo asked as he continued to walk into a tree over and over again.  
"So, Pantz. How much longer you think you'll survive this thing?" Joe asked.  
"I don't know man, maybe not long considering how well I did in the first season. But it doesn't matter, I'm just here to have fun. And the longer I'm here the more IB homework I have to makeup when I get back home." Pantz said.  
"Oh yeah I was grounded before coming here lol" Joe said.  
"What!" Pantz asked.  
"Yeah my mom stopped me from using Facebook and Haiku and all that so I snuck out to haikucon and now I'm here lol. When I get back she'll probably ground me even longer and the next time we actually talk to each other will probably be forever away!" Joe exclaimed.  
"That sucks, man" Pantz said.

[Pantz in le confession toilet]  
"Hey more time away from Joe might not be so bad"  
[le end]

Gluvr walked by, waving at Pantz and Joe.  
Alright are we just going to alternate between Kirby and Gluvr or can we just stick to one. Just use both fool. Shut up. I'm fighting with myself again.

DryBones saw the wave exchange and trembled a bit.

"Something troubling, DryBones?" Rydli asked as he wheeled up beside him.  
"What?! No! I just wish this was a Minecraft challenge so I'd be better suited" DryBones said.  
"Something seems to be upsetting you. You don't have to, but I think you'd feel better if you got if off your chest with a trusted friend" Rydli suggested, patting DryBones' shoulder.

Rydli wheeled away and DryBones thought about Rydli's offer as Kirby continued training their Pokémob and Pantz and Joe conversed.

"Hey, what's this? Oh...I'm talking to myself again" Rydli said as he picked something up from off the ground.

Eden and Jp were by a river. Eden was tending to her Mawille. Jp was riding a Tauros. She tried to control it but it ran star sight into the river, in which Jp was knocked off by the invisible force field because you can't go in the water without a Pokémon who knows surf.

"Any luck?" Eden asked.  
"None at all." Jp sighed.  
"Hey, hey Jp" Stickboy greeted, waking into the scene."  
"Oh, hey Stickboy" Jp said.  
"I got you something" he smiled, releasing the Pokémon from his Pokeball.  
"Oh my gosh, it's a Rosea. I'm a fan of those!" Jp exclaimed.  
"Yup. And it's all yours." Stickboy said, handing the ball to her.  
"Wow, really?" she asked.  
"Yeah, good luck out there. From someone who was eliminated in the second episode last season, being new to the series can be kind of difficult" Stickboy said, walking off.  
"Yeah...wow. We've been though eight eliminations and neither of us have been even close to getting cut. Now that I think of it, we're pretty lucky I guess" Jp said.  
"Yeah. I got 40th in HDI and 11th in HDA, with some luck we might be able to do ever better. This alliance thing seems to be working, I think just keeping it small with two people is best" Eden said.

Berserker was feeding his Turtwig some food. He watched over Bergmite as it attacked specific Pokemon to raise its EVs.  
Berserker wrote down the number of EVs that went up to keep track.

Blooberri was walking by with Frogadier, catching the eye of Gingerale.

"Yo! Bloo! Nice Frogadier." he said, running up to her.  
"Oh, thanks Ginge." Bloo said back.  
"You up for a trade?" he asked.  
"Hm. What are you offering?" she asked.  
"Uh, how about..." Gingerale said, reaching for the pokeballs strapped to his belt. He threw one out and a Groudon emerged.

"Whoa...you'd give this up for a Frogadier?" Blooberri asked as the Groudon towered over her.  
"Yeah come on let's make a trade" Gingerale pleaded.  
"Alright sure" she said, throwing the ball dramatically up in the air.

Gingerale just handed his over normally.

"This is great, oh man, oh wee, let's go catch some Pokémon Frogadier" Gingerale said.

Right off the bat they saw a Charmander wandering.

"Get EM! Get EMMM!" Gingerale shouted, and Frogadier tackled it. What followed was...kinda like this...

Gingerale threw a ball at the Charmander and it was successfully caught. He released it and looked into its eyes. He nodded and the Charmander fell over.

"Now let's get to work" Gingerale said to the Charmander.

StarForce was walking through the forest, pushing through branched and leaves as he followed a bright light. At the end of the trail he saw it: a Latias laying down in a bright green path of grass, secluded from the rest of the area.

"Oh wow...ok fellas just liek we practiced" StarForce whispered.

StarForce's Beedrill tried to sneakily approach the Latias, but StarForce made the mistake of summoning a Pokémon that's loud as fucking hell, so all the BZZZZZZZZT alerted the Latias. The Latias noticed StarForce and Beedrill and tried to run away, but StarForce threw a ball at it.

"No! No, wait! We can work together, you can become one of my birches!" StarForce pleaded.

Latias went into the ball and shook a few times, but it broke out.

"Oh come on out of 32 people here why do I have to be the one guy that gets a Pokémon that rejects them" StarForce complained.

The Latias tried to run away, but a Snivy bumped into it, knocking it down as it ran through the area. Nicholas was in hot pursuit behind its

"Wait! Wait! Kurtis! Kurtis the Snivy! Come on we can do something together haha!" Nicholas laughed as he follows close behind.

Snivy jumped over branches and ran under higher ones, Nicholas doing the same behind. The Snivy eventually reached the edge of the forest, and a huge cliff was in front of him, with the ground in front of him about two miles below. As Nicholas broke away from the vines and branches, Snivy jumped off the edge.

"Wait for me Kurtis" Nacho pleaded, jumping off after him.

The Snivy threw some vines out and latched onto the cliff edge, slowly pulling himself back out as Nicholas flew right by him and plummeted below.

"Oh crap looks like I'm dead. Damn it now who's going to tell r/Vaporwave how terrible they are?" Nicholas asked the cameraman.  
"I don't know maybe Gingerale?" Freddie Benson suggested.  
"NO! He does NOT know Vaporwave like I do" Nicholas protested.

As Nicholas and the cameraman were about to strike the ground, the Latias swooped down below them, catching them and soaring through the sky, being flown by StarForce.  
"Oh my gosh StarForce you saved me" Nicholas said.

The wind was blowing dramatically in their hair as StarForce directed the Latias to fly high upwards, shooting through some clouds.

"Yeah, well. I wouldn't leave my Goodra behind" StarForce said, looking back at Nicholas.  
"StarForce don't let go of the-"

But it was too late, StarForce let go of the and flew off the Latias, screaming as he dives through the sky. He waved his arms frantically in the air as he crashed onto the ground near Element.

"Geez, that's what you get for not wearing a parachute" Element nagged as StarForce screamed in agony.

Then Shinx tripped over a rock and landed on its face.

"Oh my gooood you poor little thing..." Element said, picking be Shinx up to comfort it.

Sam was making his Venesaur and Aipom do push-ups.

"4023. 4024. 2025. Come on ladies work on those ABES" Sam screamed, ripping his shirt off as he flexed his muscles.

Sam opened the Rotom fridge and took a red bull out, scoffing it down and finish it in 5 seconds, then crushing the can off his forehead.

"WE PLAY TO WIN BITCHEEEEEEEES" he roared.

The camera was now on Isaac.

"Oh, great. You want to see what I'm up to? Awesome, now it's my time to shine. So, I've been-"

"ATTENTION CONTESTANTS THE TRAINING IS UP. MEET AT THE POKEMON WORLD TOURNAMENT ENTRANCE WHERE THE SECOND SEGMENT OF THE CHALLENGE WILL BE BELF" Admin announced over a megaphone.  
"Pokémon" Rydli yelled from the distance.

He haikuers all gathered south of Driftveil City, where the PWT was. It was a port area with some boats down south, and a cave nearby connecting to Castelia City.

"Whoa, so cool. Maybe we'll get to visit there later, a-ha" J laughed, looking over the railing at the city in the distance.  
"Hey, there's a place just like that. It's called New York, which we're most likely going to go to anyways." Alice said.  
"Oh yeah. Anyways, you ever think about owning a jellyfish?" J asked.  
"Uh, what. Where's this coming from?" Alice asked.  
"Jellyfish are so cute I need some in my life" J fawned.  
"If you want to electrocute yourself sure" Alice replied.  
"Hey bitches" Sam greeted as he approached them.

More haikuers showed up as the sun began to descend from the sky.

"Hey Cloud" Pantz greeted as he showed up.  
"Sup" Cloud said.

[Cloud in le confession toilet]  
"Let's be real, competitive Pokemon fucking sucks. But this is good because of we're going to have a Pokemon challenge, there's likely going to be a SMASH challenge. Which I will DOMINATE IN!"  
Cloud's ass is wiped by the toilet manually.  
"Jesus Christ when is this thing going to go away"  
[le end]

Pseudonym showed up, leaning against the wall of the stadium.

"Hm. No one has seen any of the Pokemon Pseudo caught?" Pantz asked.  
"Who cares, he's an irrelevant boy." Cloud said.

A giant whale crashed through a bunch of stands, Mike sitting atop of it.

"Krogre" Mike said.  
"Hi" Berserker said.

Luke kicked Berserker in the legs, making him fall to the ground.

"Freak" Luke said.  
"So anyone want to trade Pokémon with me, I don't really like Blissey..." Luke asked, but everyone walked away.

[Lukeguy in le confession toilet]  
"Geez haiku just loves ignoring me, I gotta get back to hanging with Lemon and Alice" Luke said  
[le end]

As Luke approached Alice and Lemon, Shinxy and Element showed up together.

"NIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGER fuck niggers hail hitler pooooorn" Shinxy was yelling into his ears.

Element had his ears plugged, annoyed by the nonsense.

"THAT'S IT. SHINXY I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE, SHUT UP WITH THE RACIAL SLURS" Element snapped at him.  
":c" Shinxy replied.  
"I'm sorry Shinxy, but until you calm down I'm going to ignore you" Element said, walking away.  
"Wut! Moogly? Cloud? Anyone wan tu fuck niggers with me?" Shinxy asked, but the entire team shunned him.

[Shinxy in le confession toilet]  
"Is tis really how everyone feels about meh...I was just joking...they're going to exclude me just like Haikik?...but...but...niggers..."  
[le end]

Shinxy slumped down and sighed, sitting alone on a bench.  
Element got a hot dog from a stand and went to eat it, but it slipped out of the bun and the kitchen plastered all over Element's shirt.

"Fuck" Element said.  
"Retard! Retard!" Cloud said.  
"What the heck Element? Can't even use your hands now?" Rydli asked.  
"Shut up it was a mistake" Element pleaded.  
"Element stop being an idiot" Moogle said.

Next to the group, Lukeguy did the same thing with a mustard covered hot dog.

"Oh, oh man. I'm such a fool..." Luke said, but nobody cared.  
"Really?" He asked himself.

"Alright assholes let's do this thing" Admin said, Imboo next to him walking into a trash can.

He opened the doors of the PWT and all of the contestants filed in.

The haikuers walked into the stadium, gazing around at the bright neon lights flashing around. There were loud cheers from the crowd surrounding the arena and steam was blowing from the corners of the ring. Marrowsky snapped a picture of the scene. The lights grew darker as Admin guided everyone to the second level, where a balcony enveloped the stadium and allowed them to overlook the entirety of the first floor. A giant screen lay above the ring, displaying the current matchup details, but that was yet to be decided.

"Wow, so all these people came to watch a Haiku Drama tournament live?" Alice asked.  
"No, if this entire stadium was filled with Haiku Drama fans we'd have about six people. Most of them are just locale Pokémon fans wanting to see a good battle" Admin explained.  
"This is so cool" J said, grabbing onto the railing and pulling on it.  
"This is just like that Naruto arc where they all fought" J exclaimed.  
"Come on J, really? What the heck is a Nar-oo-toe?" Nicholas asked.  
"J the one time we have a challenge that relates to an anime everyone is at least a little bit familiar with, and you have to bring up ANOTHER anime" Gingerale sighed. Nicholas sighed too.

"So, Element. Catch that Mew?" Element asked.  
"Don't be so anxious to fuck it, Element. You'll find out soon enough" Nicholas said.

"So, this is how it'll work. There are 32 of you here. That would mean 5 rounds of battles. However! We aren't doing that, we're doing DOUBLE battles. So 16 pairs, 2 teams, 4 rounds. Your partner will be randomly selected on the jumbo screen and you will keep that partner throughout the tournament." Admin explained as the giant screen quickly wheeled through the icons of each haikuer.  
"You all have, or should have at least, caught six Pokémon. Now you can only use three Pokémon in one battle, but feel free to switch it up in other battles if need be. But you know select them before the battle starts, you can't be a dick and decide to use a fire type as soon as you discover your opponent sent out a grass type...unless you already picked the fire type not know-ok I think you get it. Anyways, yeah" Admin said.  
"Ok, but what if one team completely dominates and the other other team doesn't have enough members to evenly go into the next round?" Marrowsky asked.  
"Well, let's just hope for the sake of the plot everything goes smoothly and something like that doesn't happen. The brackets aren't specific, so we will move it around to avoid same team battles as much as we can, but if one team had three victors and the other has five for example, we won't mind having two pairs from the same team duking it out. The thing is, there is one ulterior goal from winning the challenge: the winning pair gets to keep ONE Pokémon from their team and use it as a mascot for the rest of the series, or until it dies, which it probably will. You know us." Admin explain.

Cue generic anime scene where everyone is surprised and he screen cuts into 32 segments to show each one's reaction.

"Holy shit I'm not reading all of that can you trim it down?" Element asked.  
"tl;dr double team tournament winning team chooses one Pokémon to keep" Moogle replied.  
"Thank" Element said.

"Ok with it further ado, our first pairs will be..." Admin began.

Everyone watched the jumbo screen as the screen was split by two lines dividing it into four corners, each scrolling quickly through each contestant's icon. Everyone watched with anticipation. After a few seconds to came to as top and the four haikuers were selected simultaneously.

GingeraleDragon & Nicholas  
Vs.  
Cloud & Kirby

"Already, eh? And with my great bud, Nicholas. Let's go kick some ass" Gingerale said, patting Nicholas' back.  
"Hm! Hm! Let's do this" Cloud said.

[Cloud in le confession toilet]  
"The others might underestimate me, but don't be mistaken I can be pretty beast at Pokémon. Let's not forget the person who caused Mr. Moogle to reveal his face, all because he lost in a battle against me..."  
[le end]

"Yay! I'm so excited, right off the bat! Haha, let's do this Cloud!" Kirby said excitedly, grabbing Cloud's arm.

As the four started walking down the steps and made their way toward the arena, there was some chatter amongst the haikuers.

"Well this should be an easy one. Gingerale and Nicholas both suck at Pokémon" Rydli said.  
"Maybe, but don't forget we'll be using anime rules. Which means you can literally yell "dodge it" and make your Pokémon stronger just by believing in them. They may overcome our comrades..." Mr. Moogle noted.

On the left side of the ring, Nicholas and Gingerale stood side by side.  
On the right side, Cloud and Kirby.  
The four icons mashed against each other on the screen overhead.  
They all sent out their first Pokémon.  
Gingerale sent out a Greninja, Nicholas a Grovyle, Cloud a Vileplume, and Kirby a Lopunny.

"MATCH #1...BEGIN!" Admin shouted over the speakers.

"Ok Nicholas how should w-"  
"GROVYLE VORE ATTACK NOW!" Nicholas shouted.

Grovyle speedily ran over to Cloud's Vileplume, trying to slice it, but it dodged each attack. Vileplume released a powder into the area, falling upon the Grovyle and making it dreary before suddenly collapsing into slumber.

"Oh, crap" Gingerale said.  
"Lopunny, stomp!" Kirby commanded.

The Lopunny leaped into the air and crashed down, behind its foot into Grovyle's head.

"Ok now this is stupid he should have woken up from that or any attack really" Nicholas said.

Gingerale gritted his teeth.

"Greninja, water shuriken!" Gingerale commanded, and he threw five shuriken a made out of water at Vileplume, each time shouting "Ning!" they looked above on the screen to see Vileplume's health bar barely go down.

"You see this is why you should tell the Pokémon which one you want to attack" Nicholas said.  
"Vileplume, poison powder!" Cloud commanded, and the purple bubbles fell around Grovyle, making him begin to shutter in pain.

"Lopunny, foresight!" Kirby commanded.  
"Really?" Cloud asked.

"It would be best to out their Lopunny..." Nicholas said.  
"Nice idea, Einstein. Maybe you should switch out your Grovyle he's doing terrible. A fire type might work." Gingerale said.  
"Yeah didn't catch one of those. Might have a fire attack though."  
"Just do whatever, as long as it's not a grass type" Gingerale said.  
"Grovyle, return. Go, DONPHAN! Ok I sounded gay shouting that I'm not doing that again" Nicholas said as Grovyle retracted into the ball and a giant Donphan emerged onto the ground, letting out a mighty roar.  
"What the hell? A Donphan? Why that of all Pokémon?" Gingerale asked.  
"I nicknamed a Phanpy Element and another Evn and made them have a baby, and this is all grown up." Nicholas explained.

The Donphan curled up into a ball and started rolling swiftly towards Vileplume and Lopunny.

"Eee" Kirby made a cute noise and flinched.  
"Dude, protect" Cloud said, bumping Kirby's shoulder.  
"Oh right. Lopunny, use protect!" Kirby commanded, and Lopunny a barrier in front of her.

Cloud and Kirby watched with confident looks as the Donphan rolled right past the barrier and Lopunny and straight into Cloud's Vileplume, knocking it to the ground. The Donphan started digging its feet into the ground, preparing for the next attack.

"Ok lol, giga drain" Cloud commanded, and a bunch of energy was sucked out of Donphan and transferred to Vileplume.

Rydli pushed his glasses up.

"It's super effective" he said.

J pushed his glasses up.

"You see, ground type Pokémon are weak to grass type Pokémon" J explained.

The Donphan started growing weary.

"Wow we really do suck at this" Gingerale exclaimed.  
"Alright Lopunny. Let's do this! Mega evolution!" Kirby said, pulling their arm out in front of them dramatically and tapping their bracelet. A huge light flashed from the bracelet as it did with Lopunny's mega stone. A giant white flash enveloped Lopunny as it grew black pants.

"Aw shit we can mega evolve I wasn't told of this" Gingerale complained.  
"Lopunny use slap attack" Kirby commanded, and let me tell you that Lopunny slapped THE SHIT out of Greninja.

Greninja and Donphan started panting tiredly, as Vileplume and Mega Lopunny stood side by side confidently.

"Well this taught me never to be partnered with Gingerale" Nicholas said.  
"Dude we both still have two more Pokémon each after this. We can do this. Your Donphan know earthquake?" Gingerale asked.  
"Yeah" Nicholas replied.  
"Use it." Gingerale suggested.  
"That Lopunny may be mega evolved but that doesn't stop it from having shitty moves" Gingerale said.

"Greninja, substitute" Gingerale commanded, and Greninja formed a small Pokémon plushie to take its place as he hid in the shadows.  
"Donphan earthquake now" Nicholas said.

Donphan buried its four legs into the ground and then slammed his head onto the floor with a cry. The entire arena rumbled as rocks began to form on the ground. Vileplume, Mega Lopunny, and the plushie shook hard. Lopunny fell down and fainted, as did Greninja's plushie. Vileplume was still standing with red HP, if panted and eyes the opponent Pokémon furiously.

"Nice" Gingerale said, going in for a high five but Nicholas didn't notice it and ignored it.

"We still got this. Their Grovyle is practically dead and Donphan is pretty weakened. If we target all of Nicholas' Pokémon until only Gingerale is left, he'll be forced to fight us one on two" Cloud said.  
"Ooo, not a bad idea!" Kirby clapped.  
"Yeah I know, I'm not called The Money Guy for no reason" Cloud said, flipping his hair.

Kirby threw out their second Pokeball, unleashing Carracosta.

J pushed his glasses up.

"Interesting choice, Kirby casted Carracosta, a water/rock type, which has an advantage over Donphan, a ground type" he said.

[Lemon in le confession toilet]  
"This fights getting intense. Cloud and Kirb are my buds, but Gingerale and Nicholas are my teammates. Hmm"  
[le end]

"Carracosta use-"  
"Wait, your Carracosta know stealth rock?" Cloud asked.  
"Um, I think so?" Kirby replied.

Jp pushed her glasses up.

"Stealth rock is a move that places rocks around the other team's feet, so every time they switch a Pokémon out, the one switching in is damaged" Jp explained.

"I like feet" Lukeguy said.

"Carracosta, stealth rock!" Kirby ordered, and with that a couple dozen of small rocks were thrown around Gingerale and Nicholas' Pokemon's feet.

"It might be best to risk the damage of Grovyle in order to quickly defeat Carracosta" Gingerale suggested.  
"Alright whatever you say, Ginge...but if my GrovyLE dies he's taking you with him..." Nicholas said.

"Elephent Jr, return. Go Grovyle" Nicholas commanded, switching between the two Pokémon.

As Grovyle was released he fell right into the pile of rocks, inflicting damage. He was also inflicted by poison and continued to sleep. The screen above them all shows Grovyle's health fall into the yellow section.

"Is it my turn? I don't care I'm going, Vileplume use giga drain on Greninja" Cloud ordered, and Vileplume absorbed some energy from Greninja, brining his health to yellow as Vileplume went from red to yellow.

"Greninja shadow sneak on Vileplume" Gingerale commanded.

Greninja buried himself into the ground, where his shadow crept up to Vileplume, who was looking around nervously to see where he went. He popped out of the ground and punched Vileplume, knocking it in its back and bringing its health down to critical condition.

"Carracosta, surf!" Kirby said.  
"[sighs] you fool" Cloud said, but it was too late.

A giant wave swept the entire arena, swiping Greninja, Grovyle, and Vileplume all of their feet. As the wave disappeared, the Pokémon were all laid on the ground, a small amount of damage to each because of their resistance from water. But it was enough to kill Cloud's Vileplume, who closed its eyes and cried, and Gingerale's Greninja, which looked at his master one as he collapsed, no longer able to continue.

Eden pushed her glasses up.

"You see, surf attacks all players on the field, not just your opponents" she explained.

Grovyle woke up.

"Ok Grovyle, vine whip, goooooo" Nicholas said, not trying to sound enthusiastic.

The Grovyle ran across the floor, leaping up and pulling its right arm back to attack. The Carracosta held both hands in front of him in protection, but Grovyle slashed right through them, knocking Carracosta back and making him faint.

"Nice..." Nicholas said.

More damage was given to Grovyle due to poison, and he fell over on top of Carracosta, fainting as well.

"My baby.." Nicholas said.

Gingerale, Nicholas, Cloud, and Kirby all eyes each other as they held their next Pokeball in hand. At the same time, they all threw theirs and the four Pokémon came out at once: Gingerale's Charizard, Nicholas' Donphan, Cloud's Cloyster, and Kirby's Wigglytuff.

"Fly!" Gingerale yelled.  
"Earthquake!" Nicholas commanded.

Charizard gave a mighty roar before leaping into the air and flying upwards.  
Donphan rumbled the ground, making Cloyster and Wifflytuff wobbles about.  
Wigglytuff tripped and landed on her face, making her face grow red with anger.

"Sing!" Kirby ordered.

Wigglytuff took her microphone out and took a huge breath, prepared to sing, but Charizard fame crashing down, headbutting Wigglytuff and making her wobble around aimlessly.

"No!" Cloud said.

"Wiggly..." Wigglytuff cried, accidentally directing her song to Cloyster.  
"Wigglytuff~" she sang, and Cloyster fell asleep.

"Heh, Cloyster kind of looks like a vag" Joe said.  
"Are you 12" Marrowsky asked

"Donphan, use-  
"WIGGLYTUFF ROLLOUT LET'S GO" Kirby screamed.  
"What the heck you just went like two turns ago what is this insanity?" Nicholas asked.

Wigglytuff laid on her back, stretching her small feet up in front of her. She grabbed her feet and started rolling forward. Starting slowly but building up speed, she started going very fast before rolling across he floor and crashing into Donphan, knocking the huge Pokémon back and causing it to faint.

"Ok, let's do this...Serperior" Nicholas said, calling the Pokémon out as it popped out of its ball.  
"You chose...two grass types...out of your three choices..." Gingerale said in disbelief.  
"Well how else would we show off how Serperior we are to the others?" Nicholas asked.

The Serperior snapped its tail and eyes the Wigglytuff maliciously.

"Charizard, flamethrower on Cloyster" Gingerale said, tipping his Charizard hat.

Charizard took a huge breath and then directed his mouth towards Cloud. Some steam came out of his nostrils before a hue narrow wave of fire erupted out of his mouth, completely targeted at Cloyster. Cloud held an arm in front of him to protect him from the heat. The Cloyster continued to snooze as his health depleted.

"Serperior, bind" Nicholas said, and Serperior slithered about, hissing his tongue as he crept among the opposing team.

Wigglytuff tried backing up near its trainer for safety, but it backed right into Serperior, who wrapped its body around her and squeezed her tight.

"Wigglytuff!" she cried in pain.

Wigglytuff's health fell into the yellow section.

Serperior looked deep into Wigglytuff's eyes and she returned the favor. They glared at each other but Serperior's expression of disdain started to fade as he noticed her cute, huge blue eyes with anime dots in them to make them look kawaii. She started to blush as Serperior smiled at her, moving her ears down in shyness.

"Wigglytuff..." she said Savin, Serperior squeezing harder.

Serperior brought his mouth close to hers and they connected, sharing a kiss. Serperior's slithery tongue invaded Wigglytuff's mouth, making her say her name in pleasure. She closed her eyes as she got lost in the kiss. Serperior pressed his mouth against hers even harder, his eyes growing red. Her mouth tightened up as she felt a tug. Her mouth was being pulled to his. Her body slowly skipped it of his hold and towards his mouth. Serperior's mouth grew bigger as he widened it to fit Wigglytuff's entire mouth in there. Wigglytuff's body started to slowly move into Serperior's mouth until only her lower body was left outside. He pulled harder and she went deeper in, starting to fall through his throat, her entire body was now inside him. He closed his mouth as she fell into his stomach.

Element's hand slowly reached towards his penis.

"No!" Shinxy slapped Element's hand.

Cloyster's eye opener dramatically.

"Oh man, I really screwed up..." Kirby daughter sadly.  
"Hey, you did your best. If we lose, we lose together." Cloud said supportively.

Kirby looked at him and nodded.

"Now Cloyster...Icicle Spear" Cloud ordered, and a giant wave of icicles circled around Serpeior before attacking him on all sides.

Serperior's eyes closed as he fell to the ground and unwrapped his body.  
Nicholas called Serperior back into his ball.

Gingerale and Cloud were the last two, each with two Pokémon left.

[Cloud in le confession toilet]  
"At that moment I knew I had the game"  
[le end]

[Gingerale in le confession toilet]  
"Cloud may have beaten Moogle before, but he still has one weakness here that he didn't have back then: he doesn't have Pokegen this time"  
[le end]

"CHARIZARD FLAMETHROWER" Gingerale yelled.

Charizard lifted himself off the ground, flying towards Cloyser in a narrow path. The steam stated coming out of his nostrils.

"Dodge it bitch" Cloud said.

The narrow fire erupted out of Charizard's mouth, directed at Cloyster, but he jumped out of the way, causing him to miss.

The audience gasped.  
Rydli pushed his glasses up.

"You see, Cloud anticipated Charizard's radius of attack from the last flamethrower, and planned Cloyster's evasive counter accordingly" he explained.

Cloyster jumped in the air as Charziard flew to where he was just standing. Charizard looked up to see Cloyster snickering at him below.

"Now use rock blast" Cloud said.

Five rounded rocks were shot out of Cloyster, each one striking Charizard and causing him to fall back a little. By the fifth rock, Charizard collapsed onto the stage, causing the whole floor to rumble a bit.

"Take that, low-tier shit" Cloud mocked.

"Shit. Charizard, get back" Gingerale said, putting his Pokeball out and calling his Pokémon back.

Cloud gave a high five to Cloyster then felt pain because he just high fived a rock.

"Ok. It's all up to you..." Gingerale said, tossing his Pokeball in the air.

Upon reaching the ground it snapped open and his third Pokémon came out, the Mach Pokémon Gatchomp. He roared as he positioned his arms in a fighting stance. The rocks on the floor dug into Garchomp's feet.

"Oh wow how intimidating. What are you going to do fuck it?" Cloud asked.

With Garchomp same a raging standstorm, only affecting those within the arena.  
The rest of the haikuers watched the event eagerly.  
Garchomp eyes Cloyster and snorted, Cloyster snickered. Garchomp took off, running for Cloyster. A group of icicle spears formed around Cloyster ready for attack but just as they were all thrown, Garchomp buried himself deep in the ground . Cloyster's smile faded as Garchomp dug up directly below him, punching Cloyster and knocking him to the ground, where his health depleted to zero. Cloud reluctantly called Cloyster back to his ball. Garchomp crossed its arm and snarled at him as he prepared his final Pokémon. Steelix came out of Cloud's ball.

"Time to bring you down" Cloud said, pulling out his arm, with a bracelet on his wrist.

Cloud smacked the bracelet, causing a huge light of varying colors to shoot out of it in the form of an X.

"Oh yeah!" Gingerale snapped back.

Gingerale did the same, pulling out his bracelet and smacking it. Both glowed for a bit as their respective Pokémon's stones began to flow. A huge light emitted from Garchomp and Steelix, and a circular light surrounded both of them. The air around the arena got rough, so Cloud and Gingerale braced themselves as the power of the mega evolved Pokémon were unleashed le. Steelix grew some longer rocks on its chin, and some rocks began orbiting around its face. Garchomp's scythe like underarms grew sharper with a red outline, and more spikes formed along his chest line. Both Steelix and Garchomp roared upon their complete evolution, and eyes each other down.

"Earthquake!" Gingerale said.

Mega Garchomp got down on all fours and dug his scythes into the ground, where he shook it and caused some massive damage to Steelix.

"Uh, heavy slam?" Cloud askedZ

Mega Steelix threw its entire body at Mega Garchomp. Mega Garchomp's health only want down a little.

"Shit, shit, no. Fuck me fifknme Dick emeleoeoakKnnnn! I should have used Mewtwo irojically'l!" Cloud shouted.

Gingerale pointed his finger at Mega Steelix, and Mega Garchomp leaped towards him, lifting his arms out and digging them deep into the Mega Steelix's rough skin. Some scratches formed and Mega Garchomp whipped its tail at the Steelix, knocking it down. The large body of Mega Steelix came crashing down, and the four haikuers in the arena were lifted a bit upon the impact on the ground.

"And our winners are...GingeraleDragon and Nicholas!" Admin shouted.

Some confetti shot over the arena and the crowd exploded into cheers. Gingerale and Nicholas' icons were on the huge screen with the word "Winners!" flashing.

The haikuers on the second floor were shocked

"Hmm" Marrowsky said, his Lucario was next to him watching blankly.  
"Damn" Alice said.

"Yes!" Nicholas said.  
"We did it Reddit" Gingerale said.  
"Bullshit bullshit bullshit bullshit bullshit fight me in a game with an actually good competitive meta like Smash and I'll kick your ass" Cloud threatened.  
"Aww I had fun. You were a good teammate Cloud" Kirby said, hugging him.  
"Shut up that doesn't make me feel better!" Cloud said.

The four walked back up the stairs and back to the second level quarters, standing near their teammates.

"That was so cool. I hope I get to go soon, a-ha! You know what else is cool, jellyfish? I wish I had one" J exclaimed.

Everyone watched the jumbo screen as it was spot into four sections again, each scrolling through everyone's icon.

Berserker & J  
Vs.  
Marrowsky and Grenade

"Whaaaaaaat? Marrowsky will be there? 3" J asked.  
"J..." Berserker said quietly.  
"Let's see how Berserker will fuck this up" Luke crossed his arm.  
"The Canadian bros" Joe said.

Berserker, J, Marrowsky, and Grenade all walked down the stairs and onto the stage. Berserker and J stood on the left side, and Marrowsky and Grenade the right.

"I have to fight Marrowsky...no..." J said.  
"Good luck" Marrowsky said to them.  
"Yeah. We're gonna, like, beat you and stuff" Grenade said.

"Begin" Admin said.

They all tossed their first Pokeball.  
Avalugg came out of Berserker's ball, Meganium out of J's, Lucario was already standing by Marrowsky ready for battle, and Maractus came out of Grenade's ball.

"Nice Maractus" Berserker complimented.  
"Really dude? You picked a Pokémon I nobody likes" Marrowsky said to Grenade.  
"We got this Muna" J said confidently.  
"I thought you named it Luna" Berserker said.  
"No, I didn't. You weren't around to hear it you don't know that" J replied.

"That was the joke" Cloud said to the others.  
"What?" Pantz asked.  
"That whole, y'know, weird dialogue exchange. It was intentionally awkward to make it humorous" Cloud said.  
"Why are you telling me this?" Pantz asked.  
"I, uh, that's the joke too. This was completely out of right field to be funny" Cloud said.  
"The expression is out of left field" Pantz said.  
"I know that I said it wrong to be funny but you pointing it out ruined it gah!" Cloud complained.

"Blizzard" Berserker said, and a huge gust of wind and ice attacked Maractus and Lucario. It barely hurt Lucario, but the damage was enough to immediately knock Maractus out.

Marrowksy gave Grenade a disappointed look, and Grenade shrugged nervously.

"Close combat, GO!" Marrowksy commanded, and the Lucario was quickly ok its feet.

The Lucario ran towards the other team, building up power in its fist. Once it got to Avalugg, it unleashed a furry of punches, circling around it and punching it at all ends. The Avalugg grew tired and collapsed on all fours, fainting, leaving Lucario and Chikorita.

"Muna, razor leaf!" J shouted, and the Meganium gave out a cry before shooting out a small set of sharp leaves directed to he Lucario.

The leaves touched Lucario and made his health barely move down.

"Ok why is grass supposed to be taken seriously in this world?" J asked.

Berserker threw out a Torterra, and Grenade Qwilfish.

"What the...a Qwilfish? Really?" Marrowsky asked Grenade.

"Lucario get back" Marrowsky said, and Lucario got behind him as he sent out his next Pokémon.

"EARTHQUAKE" Berserker commanded.

The Torterra stomped the ground and it shook violently as Marrowsky's next Pokémon, Floatzel, appeared.

Floatzel, Meganium, and Qwilfish all wobbled a bit, but the damage wasn't very effective.

"J, you have the advantage. You gotta attack Marrowsky" Berserker said.  
"But. murrowsky..." J said.

Grenade's Qwilfish shot a pin at Meganium, who cried. Meganium was no poisoned.

"No! Meganium, giga drain on Qwilfish!" J commanded.  
"And Torterra, razor leaf in Floatzel" Berserker said.  
"Whoa, whoa, slow down. I'm pretty sure you skipped my turn. Floatzel, ice punch" Marrowsky ordered.

A storm of leaves went towards Floatzel, but Floatzel ran and ducked under it, delivering a punch to Meganium. Meganium wobbled back a bit but then shook her head to regain focus.  
Energy was snapped from Qwilfish, who fell down and died. All of the energy was given to Meganium, who stop tall as she regained health.

"Grenade, if they knock out your last Pokémon I'm screed. So don't screw this up." Marrowsky said, grabbing Grenade by his shirt.  
"You betcha" Grenade nodded.

Grenade sent out his last Pokémon, Heatmor.

"Uh, what's that?" Marrowsky asked.  
"Heatmor" Heatmor said, flicking his tongue.

"Floatzel ice punch" Marrowsky repeated.  
"Heatmor, heat wave" Grenade said.

Meganium dodged Floatzel's many punches.

"Counter it, J" Berserker said.

"Meeeeee" Meganium cried as Floatzel punched it, knocking it to the ground.

Meganium tried standing up, Floatzel stood in front of her with her arms crossed. As Meganium stood, the huge wave of heat overcame her and knocked her out entirely. She dropped her head, defeated. Torterra braced himself as the heat came to him, his health went down somewhat but he still had a hefty amount.

Rydli pushed his glasses up.

"You see, Torterra is not only a grass type, but a ground type as well. Ground is resistant to fire, whereas grass is WEAK to fire. Not a bad combination, eh?" Rydli explained.  
"Whoa..." Kirby said.

Pseudonym still stood with his back against the wall, holding a bored expression.

"Come on Marrowsky..." He said under his breath.

"You did good Muna. But now it's time for...Cameron!" J shouted, tossing his next Pokémon on the ground, but nothing came out.  
"What?" Grenade asked.  
"Wow after so many years I guess nobody has ever thrown a Pokeball as shittily as J just did, so it didn't land on the button" Sam said.

Imboo walked into the railing, falling over and crashing down to the first level.

J walked over and pressed the Pokeball button manually, releasing the Feraligatr.

"Oh my God, it's Alejandro" Nicholas shouted.  
"Go, go, Alejandro!" Gingerale cheered.

"Alright Feraligate, use waterfall on Heatmor" J pointed.

The Feraligatr roared and held his arms out, letting a huge wall of water come crashing down towards Heatmor.

"Floatzel, protect Heatmor" Marrowsky said.

Floatzel ran over and pushed Heatmor or of the way, letting the water come down on herself instead. The damage wasn't very effective.

"Torterra, leach seed" Berserker said plainly, and Torterra launched a seed to plant on Floatzel.

Marrowsky looked at each other and nodded.

"Floatzel, ice punch on Torterra!" Marrowsky yelled.  
"Heatmor, use...use...uh...what the heck does a Heatmor know? Um, shadow claw" Grenade said.

Heatmor jumped into the air and pulled his arms back as dark energy built up in its palms. It came towards Feraligatr and swiped at it. Feraligatr responded with a waterfall, crashing down in Heatmor and causing him to fair immediately.

"Crap, crap, crap" Grenade said, grabbing his head.  
"Your invitation to the 2016 Canadian barbecue has been revoked." Marrowsky said.

Floatzel leaped upon Torterra, who tried throwing her off, but Floatzel held tightly onto the Pokémon. She continued to hold onto the tree on the back of Torterra as she formed a fist, giving a strong punch at the Torterra, making him fall down. Torterra growler, trying to get up, but failed. Floatzel jumped off the Pokémon and smirked.

"Berserker has one Pokémon, Jonah has two, and I have three...I can pull this off, I just need to get rid of Berserker's last Pokémon immediately." Marrowsky said to himself.  
"Can I help strategize?" Grenade asked.  
"No." Marrowsky replied.

"Ok J. I'm assuming your last Pokémon is Typhlosion. Both Feraligatr and Typhlosion won't hold up well against his Floatzel unless you have a counter move, so try to get rid of it as soon as you can" Berserker advised.

Berserker threw his last Pokeball into the ring, where Sandslash emerged.

"Sandslash" it said.

"Floatzel, aqua jet!" Marrowksy said.

Floatzel surrounded herself with a veil of water before narrowing her eyes and shooting at Sandslash.

"Dig, now!" Berserker said, and Sandslash swiftly buried himself deep underground.

Berserker bumped J with his and to alert him.  
Floatzel looked around, watching the ground closely to see where Sandslash was. Floatzel felt a tap on her shoulder and turned around to see Feraligatr, who took a huge gapping bite out of her neck. Floatzel squeezed, falling backwards and holding her neck in pain as she cried. Where she landed, Sandslash opened a hole from underneath, pulling her down and slicing her up. Sandslash jumped out of the hole victorious.

[J in le confession toilet]  
"Sorry Marrowsky"  
]le end[

Feraligatr and Sandslash stood side by side as Marrowsky called out his next Pokémon, Delphox.

"Wow, does Marrowsky's entire team consist of furry bait?" Element asked from the balcony.

"Strange choice..." Berserker said.

"Confuse rat" Marrowsky said immediately  
"Dig" Berserker shot back, Sandslash bruised himself underground as the ray floated over him.

As Sandslash stayed safely in his hole, the ray struck Feraligatr, affecting his vision and making him begin to wobble around. Everything became doubles and his aim was not unreliable.

"Hydro cannon!" J shouted.  
"What the hell do you understand how risky that is?" Berserker asked.  
"Yeah but it was already in my queue I couldn't change it unless it was the next turn" J explained.

Sandslash leaped up from the ground. It eyes Delphox and ran on all fours towards it, digging his sharp claws into the ground. But behind him a huge cannon of water was shot at him, picking him up and slamming him past Delphox and into the wall, where water continued to pour all over him until he could no longer even twitch.

"Sandslash is no longer able to battle. Berserker is out, leaving J and Marrowsky" Admin announced.

The Feraligatr and Delphox started moving closer to each other. Feraligatr threw a pinch at the fox but she dodged it and grabbed his arm, taking a stick out of her ads and shoving it in Feraligatr's eye, making him shout.

"Rip out one of the alligator's eyes" Cloud shouted from above, echoing through the stadium.

The Feraligatr stood on it ass, panting heavily as the Delphox moved closer to it, his vision was still blurry so he saw four of them.

"Feraligatr, just close your eyes and follow your instincts. You're a freakin water type don't let that Delphox best you" J shouted.

Feraligatr closed his eyes and stood up. Delphox twirled her stick around as fire caught on each side. She prepared to attack but Feraligatr blew his cheeks and spit out a rush of water, knocking Delphox down and making her wet all over. She was about to get up but Feraligatr stomped on her. Feraligatr reached down and took a huge bite out of her shoulder, causing her to scream and pant heavily, her eyelids slowly falling in defeat.

"Lucario, low seep" Marrowsky commanded, and Lucario quickly leapt into the battlefield.

Feraligatr turned to face him, but the Lucario slid past him, bringing his leg out and swiping at Feraligatr's feet and tripping him. Feraligatr fell upon Delphox and struggled to get back up. Lucario stood up victorious.

Mr. Moogle pushed his glasses up.

"You see, low sweep does more damage the heavier the Pokémon is." he explained.

"Ok J, you're still in this. Just go all in." Berserker said.

J glanced over to see Marrowsky in the background watching them, and Lucario in the foreground doing the same.

"But...Marrowksy..." J said.  
"JUST DO IT!" Berserker shouted.

"There's the meme" Joe said.

J looked over at Marrowsky and pulled out his last Pokeball. He held his arm out with his Pokeball faxing his opponent. He tossed the Pokeball upwards for it to come down and release his final Pokémon.

"Go, Marrowsky!" J said, and a Typhlosion came out. It stood up and yawned, a ring of fire surround its head.

"Sorry Jonah..." Marrowsky said as he took out a bracelet and strapped it on to his wrist. He slammed on it and a giant light of varying colors came out of it.

Lucario started glowing as he morphed into a more powerful form. His feet, hands, and the tips of his dreadlocks turned red, some extra spiked formed and more black streaks appeared. His hair flower in the wind as he roared, Mega Lucario now standing before J and Typhlosion.

"Mega Lucario, bone rush" Marrowsky said.

Mega Lucario took out a bone and flung it at Typhlosion, it struck him directly in the head, knocking him down and doing lots of damage. It returned to Mega Lucario and he threw it again at Typhlosion, doing even more damage.

"No...come on Marrowksy we can beat Marrowsky, just stand up..." J pleaded.

Mega Lucario stood and eyes down Typhlosion, waiting for him to make his move. The Typhlosion's health was in the yellow, nearing red. He used all his strength to get up. Mega Lucario put his arms out in a fighting stance.

"Flamethrower!" J commanded, and a line of fire shot straight out of Typhlosion's mouth, striking Mega Lucario and making him flinch a bit.

Mega Lucario's health went down to barely make it into the yellow section.

Mega Lucario ran to Typhlosion, readying its arms. It punched Typhlosion in the gut, then the head, then the underarms, circling around and continuing to punch in every area possible. The Typhlosion fell to his knees, wheezing as his health flashed in the red. It looked up at the Mega Lucario towering above him, who kicked him in the face and knocked him on his back. Mega Lucario started walking band towards Marrowsky.

"Sorry, Jonah" Marrowsky said, tipping his hat.

J sighed.

"The winners of this match, MARROWSKY AND GRENADE!" Admin shouted, and the crowd cheered.

As Mega Lucario got closer to Marrowksy, the crowd gasped. The Lucario turned around to see the Typhlosion twitching a bit. It pushed itself up, getting up on one knee. It slowly got on its second leg and started huffing wildly.

"Well you know he's gonna win now because they made a whole big deal about it" Lukeguy said.

"I will become hokage" J said seriously.  
"Uh, what?" Marrowsky asked.

The Typhlosion limped to the Lucario slowly. Mega Lucario got in his his battle stance again. The Typhlosion got closer and closer, finally getting a few feet away, he grabbed onto Lucario's shoulder to hold him up, breathing heavily. The Mega Lucario pulled back his arm and punched Typhlosion in the face, making him fall a bit, but he held on. He brought himself up again. Mega Lucario brushed Typhlosion's hand off his shoulder and grabbed Typhlosion's back, bringing bik closer so they now touched. Typhlosion's chest was stabbed by Lucario's spike. Typhlosion fell to the ground, breathing slowly. His eyes were now half shut. The Lucario stood above him, and was ready to finish him off. He picked his foot up and brought it down to finish Typhlosion off, but he caught it. Lucario tried to break free but Typhlosion held tightly onto the leg. Mega Lucario tried wobbling free but only made himself trip and fall on his own back. Trying to break free, Lucario grunted. But this gave Typhlosion a clear shot at him.

"Flmarhrower." J said.

A blast of fire shot out of Typhlosion and overcame Mega Lucario's face, making the Pokémon feel weary before dropping its head and fainting, morphing back to its normal state in unconsciousness.

"Wow. So, uh. Berserker, J, you guys are the actual winners. Nice job." Admin congratulated.

Marrowsky's jaw dropped.

"Alright, alright, back to the stands. Our next competitors need to get down here" Admin said.

"That was great, a-ha! Nice job Marrowsky" J said, hugging his Pokémon.

"Cool" Berserker said.

Berserker, J, Marrowsky, and Grenade all walked back up to the second level, awaiting the next battle.  
Grenade slammed his head off the railing, sighing.

"Not bad, Marrowsky. You almost did good" Rydli said.

"Round 2 boys ayyyy" Gingerale said as Berserker and J walked up near them.  
"You proud of me, Ginge? A-ha?" J asked.  
"No." Gingerale responded flatly.  
"Hm, I've never seen Berserker fight before..." Moogle said from across the floor.

The jumbo screen had already declared the next battle:  
Stickboy & Lukeguy  
Vs.  
Jp and Joe

"Woo, this should be fun!" Joe shouted, pumping her fists in the air and jumping over the railing.  
"Jp? I-oh..." STICKBUT said.  
"We'll get to see Luke fight, neat" Lemon said.  
"Yeah, I wonder when it's gonna be my turn though...starting to get frisky..." Alice said.  
"Frisky for the risky!?" Mike asked.

Stickboy and Luke stood on the left side of the arena, Jp and Joe on the right. They eyes each other before Admin gave them instruction to begin.

"Go Lukeguy!" Lemon, Alice, and Mike cheered.  
"and Stickboy, woo..." Stickboy quietly whispered.

"You ready for this?" Jp asked.  
"Aaaaaaaaaw yeah, let's kick some ass" Joe nodded.

The four all sent out their Pokémon.  
Lukeguy tossed out a Blissey, Stickboy a Samurott, Jp a Rosersde, and Joe an Empoleon.

"Blissey? Really?" Stickboy asked.  
"First of all Bissey is actually Good, second of all nobody would trade with me..." Luke said.  
"Wow, she must have trained the Rosea I gave her..." Stickboy said, looking at the Roserade.  
"What..." Luke asked.  
"Oh I have her a Rosea as a gift" Stickboy explained.  
"You have her...a skin rash?" Luke asked.

"Hey guys shut up and focus on the battle" Jp yelled over.

"I'll go for the Empoleon, you go for Rosea" Stickboy advised.  
"Doesn't your Pokémon know ice beam?" Luke asked.  
"Uh, maybe. But I don't want to hurt Jp" Stickboy said.

Samurott ran onto the field where Empoleon was and their horns connected. They continued to swing at each other in a swordfight fashion.

"Ok, Blissey use egg bomb" Luke said, and Blissey giggled as she pooped out a bomb, which was thrown at Roserade and barely did any damage.

Roserade danced around the field, twirling around Blissey as she touched her face with her hands, paralyzing her. Blissey was now stuck and couldn't move.  
Samurott and Empoleon continued to fight, Blissey struggled to move.

"Alright Roserade, lead storm on Samurott"  
Jp commanded.

Empoleon pushed Samurott away as the stork of leads brushed up against him, forcing Samurott onto the ground as leaves piled onto him until he fainted.

"Really? That easily?" Luke asked.

Empoleon rushed towards Blissey with its horn sticking out and glowing. It stuck its horn deep into Blissey's ass and started turning it like a drill at extreme speed. Blissey rotated orge and orge until she flew off the stage, landing on the ground fainted.

"What the fuck every other team got like a huge dramatic fight before their Pokémon fainted, and Blissey is SUPPOSED to last long" Luke complained.

Stickboy summoned a Scrafty, and Luke a Cofagrigus.

"Hm, cool. What made you catch one of those?" Stickboy asked.  
"So when I die it can bury its my body within its casket" Luke explained.  
"Cool, cool" Stickboy nodded.

"Empoleon, surf!" Joe said.

A huge wave of water crashed through the arena, inflicting damage upon Roderade, Scrafty, and Cofagrigus. It wasn't very effective on Roserade.  
Scrafty tried pulling his pants up and slipped on the water.

"Swagger" Stickboy said.  
"Really? Do you really want to risk that?" Luke asked.

Roserade was throwing out toxic spikes among Cofagrigus and Scrafty's feet.

"Cofagrigus use shadow ball" Luke said, attacking Empoleon.

It barely did damage

"You're supposed to be specific on who to attack" Stickboy said.

Scrafty went to attack Roserade but slipped over his pants. He tried getting up but Stickboy coughed, cueing him to faint. Scrafty dropped to the ground and closed his eyes.  
Empoleon rushed towards Cofagrigus, putting its head back and releasing a large cannon of water directed towards him. Cofagrigus fell down and fainted.  
Lukeguy was smacking his head with his hands while Stickboy was whistling.

"We're doing great!" Jp said.  
"Yeah, man! Wow, we're such a good team, haha." Joe laughed. Joe looked up at the stands and waved at Pantz.

"Ok Stickboy. Don't fuck this up" Luke pleaded.  
"Oops my Bidoof already fainted" Stickboy said.

Luke sighed and tossed his last Pokéball, unleashing Sawk.

"Let's kick some ducking ass" Luke said.

Sawk ran across the floor, leaping up and aiming for Empoleon. It duh it's foot into Empoleon's head, knocking him down and defeating him. Roserade danced over, above to throw position at it, but Sawk grabbed Roserade's arm and flipped her over, throwing her off the ground and knocking her out. Sawk jumped back towards Lukeguy. Sawk put his hand arm up for Luke to give him affection, but Lukeguy didn't know how to.

"It's one Pokémon we can do this" Jp said, and Joe nodded.

Joe threw out a Delibird, while Jp summoned a Mienshao.

"Delibird? Who the FUCK used a Delibird?" Sam asked.  
"It's cool ok" J said.

Jp chuckled.

"Looks like Lukeguy's in a pickle. Fighting types are weak to flying types" she said.  
"Yeeeeeeah my Delibird only knows present..." Joe said.

Delibird handed Sawk a present and smiled, Sawk's health was restored and he punched Delibird in the face.  
Mienshao whipped its arm at Sawk, harming him. Sawk rubbed his arm, trying to soak in the damage. He rushed towards Delibird, kicking him off the stage. He then flipped backwards and attempted to brick break Mienshao, but Mienshao slapped him away with her...things...and he fell to the ground. Mienshao was over him, ready to attack, but he did a 360 kick and knocked her down. He quickly got to his feet and went to punch her, but Mienshao rolled over, making Sawk miss. She jumped to her feet and grabbed Sawk, pulling both her arms behind his back and putting him in a submission position, laying him on the ground. Sawk tried to break free but Mienshao tugged on his arms, trying to break them off. Sawk screamed. Luke flinched and looked away. As Sawk's health depleted more and more, going from green to yellow to now red. As Luke sighed, some words came out of Sawk's mouth shocking everyjuan.

"SAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWK. SAAAAAAW, SAAAAAAW, Aaaaaaaw, la, l, LAAAAAAA, LAAAAA, LAAAAAVVVVV, L-LLAAAAAAAVe, L, L, LOOOOOOOVE ME MASTERRRRRR" he screamed.  
"Aw, he just wanted some love" Stickboy said.  
"No" Luke said.  
"Come on it mighty give him strength" Stickboy said.

Luke walked into the field. Mienshao let go of Sawk. Sawk looked up at his master and Lukeguy looked deep into his eyes. He helped him up and they hugged. Then Mienshao picked Sawk up and broke his back, throwing him off stage. She then whipped Luke in the eye, making him fall down.

"JP! JOE! YOU ADVANCE TO ROUND 2!" Admin announced.

Jp and Joe cheered and hugged each other.

The four walked up the stairs and stood near their teammates.

"Good effort, eh bro?" Stickboy asked, offering Lukeguy a fist bump, to which he didn't return.  
"If we lose I'm voting you off for throwing that match" Luke said.  
"Touchy" Stickboy said, looking at the other direction.

"Is it my turn yet? I want to KICK SOME FUCKING ASS" Sam screamed.  
"Dick" Carz said.

The screens stopped on the next competitor icons.  
Blooberri and Mike  
Vs.  
Mr. Moogle and Pseudonym

"Finally" Pseudonym said, taking his back off the wall and walking towards the stage.  
"Great. We got this" Mr. Moogle said confidently.  
"Mike, huh? Cool" Blooberri said.  
"Krogre" Mike said.

The four walked down and stood by their respective teammate. Blooberri and Mike stood on the left side of the arena, and Mr. Moogle and Pseudonym on the right.

[Mr. Moogle in le confession toilet]  
"Pseudo's pretty snazzy guy, but I'm not sure about his Pokémon skills. Guess I'll find out now"  
[le end]

[Blooberri in le confession toilet]  
"I don't battle others much, and I'm not into competitive Pokémon. And Mike just started playing Pokémon for the first time in like two years, so, yeah I'm gonna get creamed"  
[le end]

"Goooooo, Oddish" Bloiberri said, and the tiny Pokémon emerged from the ball.

"Oddish!" It said.

Mr. Moogle and Pseudonym tossed their balls out next, and a Goodra and Swampert emerged.

Mike threw his Pokémon into the battle, and a giant Kyogre took up the entire arena, squashing the other Pokémon. Oddish was dead, and Swampert and Goodra squeezed out from underneath, standing at the edge of the arena. Moogle and Pseudonym jumped back a bit to make room for their Pokémon.

"Wonder how this fight will turn out..." Pantz said.  
"Eh, who cares. Moogle and Pseudonym are both irrelevant as hell, all they know how to do is make a battle boring" Cloud said.

"You got his Mike" Alice cheered.  
"Hey bitch I can cheer harder" Nicholas said.  
"Go Mike!" Nicholas shouted.

"Is my Pokémon alive?" Blooberri asked, looking over at her Oddish with concern.  
"Krogre use surf" Mike commanded.

A huge wave emitted form Kyogre as it roared. The crashing eaters flew towards Seampert and Goodra, who tried turning away.

"Ok I didn't know legendaries were legal this is kinda bull" Moogle said as his Goodra was whacked off the head with...water!  
"What a drag" Pseudonym sighed.

Oddish was carried off the stage by water, where it died.

"Oh shit sorry Bloo!" Mike said.  
"It's alright, I think I know just the Pokémon to help..." Bloo said, reaching for her Pokeball.

"I wonder who it is..." J thought.

Gingerale smirked from behind him.

"Let's just say this is going to be a massacre" Gingerale said.

Bloo's Pokéball was tossed into he stage floor, where a bright light emitted from it as it opened, and the huge Pokémon stood tall and made a mighty roar that shook the entire stadium. It was Groudon.

"Jesus Christ" Moogle said.

The sides of the stage started to extend a bit to accommodate for the size of the Pokémon.

"Swampert dive" Pseudonym commanded, and the Pokémon immediately dug himself under the water.  
"Goodra, thunderbolt!" Moogle shouted, and Goodra yelled as a thunder cloud formed above Kyogre, raining thunder on him and hardly making him flinch.  
"Groudon, earth power" Blooberribfommanded.

A trail of rocks linking Groudon and Goodra formed in the ground. The rocks raised above the ground along the trail until it got to Goodra, rising right under it and knocking it back. Swampert leaped out from under the water and kicked at the rocks, chipping it off and causing it to fly to the other side of the arena. It tipped off Kyogre's head.

"Swampert, dive again" Pseudonym said, and Swampert quickly found his way back underwater.

Kyogre turned its body trying to get Swampert, but in the process accidentally knocked Groudon back. Angered, Groudon punched Kyogre.

"Krogre?! No!" Mike said.  
"Use surf" Mike said.  
"Wait Mike I don't think-"

Kyogre used surf, covering the entire arena with even more water. Groudon fell on his back in the water. Some steam came out of his ears as he collected himself off the ground. He rushed at Kyogre, grabbing him with both hands and pushing him back. The two fell on Goodra, who proceeded screamed like a bitch. Below the water Swampert was watching the battle unfold.

"Krogre! Krogre! Bad Krogre!" Mike scolded, whacking his Kyogre with his dick.  
"If we can get them to work together we can do tremendous damage" Bloo said.  
"Hold on this is a good opportunity to make a two second video where nothing happens and the camera moves quickly" Mike said, recording the floor with his phone.

"Ok Goodra, get back. Go, Ferrothorn" Moogle said.

"Ah, my eyes. It's so ugly!" Riley shouted.  
"He didn't even throw the ball yet" Alice said.  
"Oh. Sorry..." Riley replied.

Moogle threw the ball and the Ferrothorn was unleashed, whipping its vines.

"I drew a Ferrosees for a goodbye Flipnote once. It was pretty snazzy" Lemon said.

"Ok so Grass and Steel...if Groudon used a fire type move he's practically a goner" Blooberri thought to herself.

Groudon picked Kyogre up and tried carrying him offstage, but Kyogre spit tubs of water in his face, the force of the water pulling Kyogre out of Groudon's grasp and back on the stage.

"Groudon, Lava Plume!" Blooberri commanded, and Groudon roared as hordes of fire surrounded him and moved towards Ferrothorn.

Swampert jumped out of the water and spit out a turret of water at the firewall, extinguishing some of it. Some ashes still struck Ferrothorn, doing a fair amount of damage, but Swampert was barely damaged by the amount he was given.

"Fuck that Swampert. Kyogre kill it" Mike said.

Kyogre swam over towards Swampert, who slipped underneath the water once again.

"Holy shit stop doing that! Spammer!" Mike complained.

Rydli pushed his glasses up.

"It seems the more Kyogre attacks, the more water is thrown into the battlefield. This gives an advantage to Swampert, who isn't as large as Kyogre, and can move with more agility in the water" Rydli explained.

Kyogre looked around effortlessly for Swampert, who swam underneath him. As Groudon prepared for its next attack, Swampert leapt up in front of it, sucker punching it in the face. Not the move sucker punch that was just an expression. As Groudon was caught off guard, he fell backwards a bit. Swampert used hydro pump on the Pokémon and knocked him completely off the stage. He crashed onto the floor, trying to pull himself back up with fatigue.  
Kyogre kept looking under the water for Swampert, feeling a tap on him, he looked up to see Ferrothorn, who had just saved up the energy for its solar beam. A large beam of light from the sky appeared in front of Ferrothorn, vaporizing Kyogre and doing enough damage to knock it out.  
Groudon got back into the stage, roaring. Swampert kicked at its legs, causing him to crash on the ground.

"KROGRE!?" Mike screamed.

"Nicely done" Pseudonym complimented to Seampert, scratching the back of his ear.

"Nani!?" Alice shouted.

"Ok, one Pokémon left. But you have two. Let's do this" Bloo said.  
"Ok Blooberri!" Mike replied.  
Mike and Bloo both tossed their Pokéball out. They both landed and two Pokémon came out, Altaria from Bloo's ball...hehe...and Swalot from Mike's.

"How many dragons are we gonna have today, amiright?" Lemon asked.  
"At least 10 more" Gingerale replied.

"Get back Swampert, go Flareon" Pseudonm called out. His Swampert stood behind him as Flareon was summoned form a Pokéball.

"Oh boy Pseudonym caught the worst Pokémon let's see how this goes" Element taunted form the stands.  
"Let's hear you say that when you're down here getting your ass kicked. Flareon, flame wheel!" Pseudonym ordered.

Flareon leaped forward, summoning a wheel of fire circling in a rapid speed in front of him.

Blooberri looked at the fire, then at Ferrothorn.

"Altaria, reflect!" Bloo ordered.

A pink glass wall popped Ito existence in front of her as the ring of fire caught it. It ricocheted off and back towards Ferrothorn. Ferrothorn closed its eyes in fear by nothing struck him. He opened his eyes to see Flareon standing in front of him with a smug expression, fire absorbing into its fur, increasing its power.

"I anticipated you'd do that, guess you didn't account for a misfire." Pseudonym said nonchalantly.

The crowd was silent, waiting for the next user's move.

"Swalot, eat it!" Mike ordered, swinging his finger at the Flareon.

Swalot slugged towards Flaeron, opening its mouth wide so it's has reached the floor. Flareon jumped on top of its head and then forward off. Swalot turned its eyes around to see him but before he could process his miss he ran strider into Ferrothron. Swalot closed its mouth on the Pokémon and shuttered. Inside, Ferrothorn released pins all around the inside of Swalot's mouth. Swalot tried to swallow, but Ferrothron used two vines to crack open his mouth and walk out.

"Haha well Swalot can take that, he's immune to being poisoned" Mike said.  
"Yeah well attacking Ferrothron does damage alone, let alone the extra damage given with the iron helmet I equipped. And hey, just for safe measure, I made sure not to forget to place spikes" Mr. Moogle said.

Mike looked up at the screen and watched Swalot's health drop to the yellow bar.

"Altaria, dragon dance" Bloo shouted, and Altaria spun around and did a majestic step, boosting her attack and speed.

"Flareon, double team let's go" Pseudonym ordered.

Flareon concentrated and shifted about, forming several clones. Swalot looked around confused.

"Swalot, go after them" Mike ordered.

Swalot chomped at the copies, making them fade away one by one, trying to find the real clone.

"Ferrothorn, solar beam" Mr. Moogle said, and Ferrothron concentrated energy, the solar power building up within.

"Altaria fire blast now!" Bloo said.

"Altaria" Altaria shouted, shooting out a line of fire towards Ferrothron.

Flareon noticed and jumped for it, which is just what she was hoping for. This made the Flareon stand out from the clones, so Swalot jumped at it and captured the Pokémon its mouth. The blast of fire struck Ferrothron, igniting it. Ferrothron immediately collapsed on the ground, his health bar dramatically flew down.

"Use self destruct as a last resort" Pseudonym advised.  
"Dude I just charged for a solar beam. It's To Late." Mr. Moogle said.

A fire caught on one of Ferrothron's vines, a burn. The burn did a little damage, finishing him off.

Mike and Blooberri exchanged a high five.

"Psudo has three Pokémon left, but Swampert and Flareon were in battle for a bit so they shouldn't take too long to finish off. Moogle has one fresh Pokémon left, as do you. And then we both have one Pokémon, Swalot I don't see lasting long but Altaria could do well if treated right" Blooberri thought.  
"ONIONS SHREAK" Mike agreed.

Moogle threw out his last Pokéball, and a large, light orange Pokémon emerged. Dragonite the conquerer.

"Poo" Bloo said.

Dragonite picked the Flareon up and started twirling it. The Flareon started crying as it was spun around so fast like a fan on high speed, did you like my simile I thought it was good. The Dragonite took a step back then flung the Flareon across the stage where it landed on Altaria's cloud. Flareon and Altsria looked into each other's eyes.

"Altaria" Altaria said.  
"Altar-Flareon" Flareon said.

Altaria tightens Flareon in its cloud and aimed dragon breath at its head. The Flareon formed dizzy symbols in his eyes as he fell off the cloud and onto the ground, defeated. The Altaria looked up to see Swalot on the ground not too far ahead, Dragonite and Swampert over its body.

"A necessary sacrificed" Mr. Moogle deemed.

"Ok Mike, looks like it's all up to you. What's your final Pokémon?" Bloo asked.  
"Meh final Pokémon...ish...o3o...me! [turns in2 a meowth]" Mike said, prancing onto the field.

"What, role playing is allowed?" Jp asked.  
"Well we assumed everyone here moved past ironic role playing, I wasn't expecting that to make a comeback" Admin admitted.

Mike ran across the floor.

"Dude, I can't hurt Mike" Mr. Moogle said.  
"Dragonite, on guard" Moogle commanded.

Mike punched Dragonite in the mouth, yanking on it's tongue and pushing it to the ground. Mike took out a spaghetti taco and slammed it on his head.

"Ok never mind best the shit out of Mike use fly" Mr. Moogle said.

Dragonite grabbed Mike and soared into the sky, flapping its wings gently as it ascended to the ceiling. The entire audience glanced up as Dragonite and Mike crashes through the rooftop, good ever higher. Dragonite then looped around, diving straight for the ring, hugging Mike close. Mike punched Dragonite in an effort to make him release, but he kept a firm grip. The two twirled as they neared the ground, going faster and faster. Swampert puffed its cheeks and shot or a gust of water. Dragonite let go of Mike the kike and aimed upwards, flying narrowly across the stage and landing next to his master. The water Swampert shot struck Mike, throwing him off the stage and knocking him out.

"We have our winners! Mr. Moogle and Pseudonym, you will advance to round 2!" Admin cheered.

The crowd busted into claps and cheers. Moogle and Pseudo walked up the stairs and back to their positions. Moogle waved to the crowd chanting their names.

"Come on, aren't you a little excited?" Moogle asked.  
"Whatever, it was a nice match." Pseudonym shrugged unenthusiastically.

"Unbelievable...Mike is good at literally every game he picks up...and he was just defeated...by fucking Pseudo" Cloud said in astonishment, watching as nurse Kanga picked Mike up and placed him on a gurney and transporting him away, Bloo close at his side.

"That Dragonite...hope I get to fight it, a-ha!" J laughed.  
"My Charizard would kick its ass" Gingerale said unimpressed.

"Good job guys" Marrowsky complimented.

Mr. Moogle nodded back to him.

Everyone watched the huge screen as the next fight was announced:  
Reu and Sam  
Vs.  
DryBones and Eden

"ALRIGHT LET'S KICK SOME FUCKING ASSS!" Sam shouted loudly, pumping his chest.  
"Yeah sure whatever" Reu said.  
"Who the fuck are you? My partner? GET TO WORK SLUT" Sam said, throwing Reu over the balcony.

"DryBones? Eh..." Eden groaned quietly.  
"What? What does that mean? What was that sound supposed to suggest? You think I'm some dumby or something? Geez who doesn't...I'll show you, I'll show all you...you'll all be grounded grounded grou-"  
"Just, get to the stage" Eden said, pushing him down.

Sam was standing on the left side of the ring, Reu slowly getting up. Eden and DryBones were on the right.

"Go Eden and DryBones!" Jp, Kirby, and Joe cheered.  
"DryBones is gonna frick it up somehow" Grenade said flatly.

DryBones looked up at Grenade and then back at his opponents with a frustrated expression. The four all held their first Pokéball out, ready to unleash. They all tossed simultaneously and the balls hit the ground, four Pokémon emerging. In front of Sam, Venusaur, in front of Reu, Reuniclus, in front of Eden Mismagius, and in front of DryBones Ursaring.

"Oh no..." Eden said.

[Eden in le confession toilet]  
"Sam's Venusaur...known for being a pain in the ass. We're gonna have to get rid of him as soon as we can"  
[le end]

Sam smirked.

"Let's do this" Sam shouted, ripping his mega ring into view. He pressed down on t and Venusaur glowed before expanding a bit and growing some extra trees. Mega Venusaur.

"Oh wow he grew like two extra plants on its head what a cool design" Pseudonym said.

Mr. Moogle pushed his glasses up.

"Actually, Mega Venusaur is the mega evolution of Venusaur. With health like that and an ability that halves the damage of fire and ice types, Eden and DryBones are in for some trouble..." he explained.

"Mega Venusaur use sleep powder" Sam commanded, and with the snap of a goner the Venusaur spit out some powdered dust from his bud, flowing over Mismagius' body and making her dreary, she fell to the ground as she drifted off to sleep.

"Uh, Ursaring. Crunch!" DryBones said.

Ursaring walked up to Mega Venusaur and took a bite out of his bud. His health went down about 1/16.

"Reuniclus, trick room" Reu demanded.

"Reuniclus" Reuniclus said, jumping up and down.

The audience watched as the arena was outlined in a grid fashion, the diagram rotated halfway.

Mr. Moogle pushed his glasses up.

"Trick Room makes be slowest go first, and the fastest go last" he explained.

"Dude my Venusaur was fast that's just setting me back" Sam complained, forming a fist to punch Rue with.  
"Oh, sorry...I wasn't expecting doubles..." Reu defended.  
"Whatever, my Venusaur's a pretty bulky bitch. He can take whatever those losers throws at us" Sam said, punching his hand.

Misgagius continued to snooze.  
Ursaring ran up to Venusaur and Reuniclus, stepping on Venusaur's face and swiping relentlessly at its head. It stabbed its claws into its skull, but Venusaur effortlessly grabbed him with his vines and tossed him to the ground. Reuniclus grabbed the temple of his head with both hands and sent concentrated psychic energy at the Ursaring, striking him and pushing him back a bit. Mismagius woke up.

"Wait, Reuniclus is weak to Dark and Ghost. It would be super effective...but he might see that coming and use protect..." Eden thought.  
"Ursaring go fight it again" DryBones commanded.  
"Wait, equip this" Eden said, tossing a toxic orb into Ursaring's hands.

The Ursaring ran towards the Mega Venusaur with the orb in his hands, holding a puzzled look. He pumped right into the Venusaur, dropping his orb. Ursaring used facade on him, swiping at him as fast as he could, but Mega Venusaur used sleep power on him and put him to sleep.

"THUNDER WAVE" Eden screamed.

Mismagius shot out a beam of electricity, striking Mega Venusaur directly and making him vibrate. He stood perfectly still and wouldn't move, now paralyzed.

"Finish him off with shadow ball" Reu said, and Reuniclus formed a ball of shadow in front of him, rolling around and increasing in size until it was large enough, then tossing it at the Ursaring and knocking him out.

"Oh no, the wheel of fortune chose to make me lose that once..." DryBones sighed.  
"How does, why do...what?" Eden asked.

DryBones threw his next ball out, releasing Pangoro.  
Eden facepalmed.

Reuniclus used psychic again, the beam of energy was directed at Pangoro, but Mismagius pushed him out of the way, letting it hit her instead.  
Pangoro punched his hand with his other in a similar fashion to Sam and bit down on his lead. He ran up to Mega Venusaur, holding a fist back as ice former from his palm. He brought his fist out and punched Mega Venusaur square in the mouth. Everyone watched the health slowly go down, now in the yellow.

Mega Venusaur's bud twitched a bit as it sagged. It puffed up and sprang out s large ball of goo, that directly hit Misgagius. Mismagius fell to the ground fainted.

"No..." Eden said.  
"No!" DryBones screamed.

Eden sighed as she swiped another Pokéball from her belt, pressing the button to enlarge it.

"Hey, Reu. I figure we're kicking enough ass out here, how about we have some fun and make sure they don't miss out on the rest of the party?" Sam asked.  
"Your Mega Venusaur is doing fine enough, let's just stick to that" Reu suggested.  
"Who cares we're gonna win anyways but they won't get to see my other Pokémon" Sam said.  
"Sam they can literally just put together what other two Pokémon you have just judging by your past profile icons and from what you answer on "who's your favorite Pokémon" questions. They already know what the rest of your team is, showing off isn't they important. Let's stick to the sweep" Reu said.

"Venusaur, get back bro. Ambipom, let's dance..." Sam said, returning Mega Venusaur and tossing his next Pokéball out.

Ambipom emerged and bounced off each foot before throwing his hand tails below him to keep him up.

Eden summoned Mawile, who stood nervously by Pangoro, who gave her a nod.

Eden pulled out her mega ring and slammed down on it. The air started to go wild as Mawile felt a transformation over Coke her, her lower fur turned maroon, and her giant jaw transformed into a slightly bigger version with some spikes pointing outwards.

Alice pushed her glasses up.

"Mega Mawile is a steel slash fairy type, giving it an advantage over Reuniclus" she explained.

Lemon pushed his glasses up.

"Actually, assuming it has a dark move, right? Because he's not weak to those types" Lemon said.

"Oh, right. Haha. Yeah just joking, the inaccurate information was just a joke" Alice brushed off.  
"What. It sounds like you just made a concrete mistake but instead of admitting it you're passing it off as a joke" Lemon said.  
"Ok first of all it's not a "concrete" mistake Lemon don't use a stupid word like that to describe it, and second of all it WAS a joke. It was satire on people commonly mistaking Pokémon types when they think they know everything" Alice explained.  
"I don't get it...I mean you can-"  
"Lemon shut up I'm trying to watch a battle, ok. Like, ok? Ok? Ok, like, ok." Alice said.

Reuniclus shot out another psychic blast, striking Pangoro, as Mawile used foul play and leaped at Reuniclus, preparing to tear his ass to shit.

Mawile swiped at Reuniclus, scratching his jelly skin and knocking him back. He fell to the ground as his health fell to red. Reu ran up to him.

"No, no. Eden you monster! It's ok, we can still win this" Reu said, hugging his Pokémon. But it was too late, for Reu's Reuniclus was actually...an emosis, and cut himself to death.

Pangoro tumbled on the ground. He picked himself up as his health fell to red.  
Ambipom speedily ran across the field, his tail extending over his head. As he got to Pangoro he slapped the Pokémon with both hands, knocking him on the ground and knocking him out.

Mawile grabbed Ambipom with her jaw and but down hard on him as he struggled to break free, pushing force onto it with his tails. She headbutted him and knocked him to the ground. He shook his head and Rose back up, regaining his sunny disposition.

Reu and DryBones both threw balls out at the same time.  
On Reu's end was a Gengar, on DryBones' a Beartic.

"Wow, looks like DryBones' entire team consists of the We Bare Bears cast, amirite?" Isaac joked, to no one's laugh.

After a few seconds Cloud chuckled, and the others gave him a confused look.

"What, you've never heard a joke so bad that it's funny because no one is laughing at it?" Cloud asked.  
"Yeah, haha. That was my plan. Awkward jokes are my forte, it was intentional" Isaac explained.  
"Alright guys how much longer is this "that was the joke" gag going on, this is stemming out longer than a Fairly Odd Parents episode gag. What's next, someone's going to show up and wish everything back to normal?" Mr. Moogle asked.

[Mr. Moogle in le confession toilet]  
"Yeah, pretty nice joke back there. Bet everyone's going to be quoting that one on the Reddit discussion page for Haiku Drama after this episode airs"  
Moogle checks his fingernails.  
[le end]

Gengar snickered snoopily as he held his hands to his mouth. He glanced over at Ambipom, who smiled at him.

Mega Mawile ran towards them, but Ambipom pressed his tail against the ground and catapulted himself over Mawile, raising his second tail over him to prepare to strike Beartic. Beartic brought his head back and blew out a powerful blast of air, knocking Ambipom back and to the ground. Ice shards flew by Mega Mawile and struck Gengar, making his health slightly diminish. Reu ripped his sleeve off in an effort to look badass and slammed his hand onto his mega ring. Gengar laughed as he transformed from his feet to his head, mega evolving into Mega Gengar. His arms were rooted to the ground but he retained his malicious grin. Ambipom slapped Beartic with a twirl, just as Mega Gengar grabbed onto Mega Mawile and held her down. Mega Gengar lowered his head to Mawile, but she responded by smashing her head to his, causing him to lose his grip. As Ambipom grabbed onto Beartic by both sides, Beartic sneezed, and some icicles fell from the ceiling and crushed Ambipom's head, Ambipom wobbled around dizzily before collapsing unconsciously.

"Wow DryBones you should not talk during the battle more it seems to be helping" Eden said.  
"What?!" DryBones asked.

Sam's jaw dropped.

"What the FUCK! DryBones? Fucking DryBones defeated MY Ambipom!?" Sam shouted.  
"Well this battle could have been over by now if we stayed with the sweep" Reu shrugged.

Sam punched Reu in the face, knocking him on the ground.

"I still have one Pokémon left that will kick their fucking asses" Sam deemed, whirling his ball onto the field.

"Rotom!" Rotom cheered.

"You know I wish they'd describe the Pokémon that come out instead of assuming we know what they all look like." Luke said.  
"No." Gingerale replied.

"Oh shit!" Eden said.  
"Rotom, oven form" Sam commanded.

Rotom shot himself at a nearby oven because all Pokémon arenas have those laying around, taking on its form and returning to the arena.

"Ok we need to get rid of Rotom first, if your Beartic can tough it out we could have a shot at taking down Venusaur. But we have no idea what other Pokémon Reu has, so be prepared..." Eden said in a huddle with DryBones.  
"What was that? I was watching Wheel of Fortune on my phone. This guy didn't know the answer was "Minecraft", freakin' idiot" DryBones said.  
"Just don't do anything stupid" Eden sighed.

"Aqua jet!" DryBones yelled.  
"Sucker punch!" Eden yelled.  
"Overheat!" Sam yelled.  
"Will-O-Wisp!" Reu yelled.

Beartic formed a veil of water around him as he zoomed across he ground, striking Rotom headfirst. Mega Mawile punched Gengar. Rotom heated up and a blazing fire shot out from his body. It shot at Mawile and harshly decreased her health. Mega Mawile fell to her knees, but used all her strength to get back up and continue fighting. Mega Gengar spat out a burst of fire, hitting Beartic and spreading across his fur, leaving a burn.  
Mega Mawile limped over to deliver another attack at Mega Gengar, but he spit a Will-O-Wisp at her. With her last move, she threw her jaw out to snap at the Gengar. Beartic threw some icicles at the Gengar to finish him off, but that made him open for Rotom too attack, who used overheat and blasted Beartic with a large wall of fire. Beartic and Mega Mawile both fell to the ground and collapsed next to each other.

"Darn we lost. Alright let's go back" DryBones said, walking away.  
"I still have one Pokémon left" Eden said.  
"Oh" DryBones sighed.  
"We can do this..." Eden said, tossing the ball.

The ball opened and the wishing Pokémon Jirachi flew up.

"Whoa! Nice catch Ebin!" Ziggy shouted down.

"Oh yeah, welol oaoJiUu }^}^|*£&" Reu yelled, and Mega Gengar sunk into the ground and floated over to Jirachi.

Jirachi smashed its head into Gengar's, immediately knocking him out.

"What the..." Reu said.  
"Ugh, come on Reu. I gotta carry this team all on my own now" Sam sighed.  
"I still have one Pokémon left...I doubt she can take down three of our Pokémon with a dinky little Jirachi" Reu said, tossing his next Pokéball out.

A Missingno popper out.

"Hey cool. How'd you manage to manage you How'd. cool Hey." Sam said, exploding.  
"Oh my osiososooaoOo 821919364729-0-92637291717" Cloud said as his head exploded.  
"Haahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaaha vro Idont even KNOW EHAT you just saidNbl Joe inflated and flew into the sun.

"ERROR WRROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERORRIROROROORORR"

The entire second level collapsed and everyone fell into the audience on the first floor.

"INLLL NUDGEGEGEHEGEHSKiziz" Element's fedora ate him and started growing. If roared as it chewed on Shinxy's head.

Alice's clothes fell off and she fell through the floor into meme hell.  
Riley spat diarrhea out of his diarrhea and Lemon stuck his head in Riley's diaper eating it.  
A jellyfish flew through the window and J started to have sex with it. Gingerale took a gun out and shit himself as Nicholas and Mike devoured each other.

18190192382922782922 Eoeorr Aerorr Eoeorr  
DryBones' skin was ripped off so only his bones were showing. Marrowsky fell off the balcony and crushed DryBones as his sunglasses were taken off and beams of lasers shot out of his eyes.  
Jp's eyes plopped out and Stickboy's head was switched with his balls. Isaac turned into a pineapple and Pseudonym started walking in slow motion.  
Mr. Moogle and Grenade remained normal.

"Hey what's going to happen to us?" Moogle asked.  
"They'll probably skip the least important haikuers to get back to the plot" Grenade said.  
"What to heck? I thought we went over this, I'm not-"

Pac-Man crashes through the roof and chomped through Moogle and Grenade, continuing to chomp away and destroy everything.

Pantz' head fell off and Ziggy started using tumblr instead of 4chan. Carz was acting as Carz normally would.  
A gang of math homework was attacking Rydli, throwing decimals at him.  
StarForce turned into a jellyfish and J started having sex with him.  
Lukeguy's greatest fear emerged: his family showed up. They lined up to give him spankings. An army of ting R.O.B. toys jumped on Robot and started beating her up.

Time froze and everyone died.

7382911763827272728292827292010191736392 ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR 27291010101001000101011002010102010101010100101001101010101011011101100000110101101010001010101010101010011010101

Reu walked up next to Eden in the midst of the destruction.

"Yeeeeeeeah maybe catching a Missingno wasn't the best idea" Reu said.  
"I wish everything back to normal" Eden said.

And everything returned to just before Missingno was released.

"Now to destroy this" Reu said, throwing the Pokéball on the ground in an attempt to break it, but accidentally released it again.

ERROR ERROR ERROR

"Aw shit" Reu said.  
"I wish everything back to normal" Eden said.

"That whole thing was so...out of nowhere..." Rydli said.  
"Yah that was the joke it was so random haha" Cloud said.  
"What? What does that even mean?" Rydli asked.  
"You know that whole situation was so crazy and random, nobody saw it coming and it has no point of even being there. The entire thing was just one huge joke of an appearance haha" Cloud said.  
"Maybe, but the way you say it is like you're convincing yourself it's funny by forcing the explanation that it was intentional " Rydli said.  
"What" Cloud asked.  
"It's like falling on your face and saying you meant to do that" Rydli said.  
"No it isn't shut up" Cloud said.

"Ok Eden Since Reu's retarded looks like we're going mono and mono. BRING IT ON BITCH" Sam roared.

Eden and Jirachi exchanged a confident look.  
Jirachi levitated over towards Rotom and slapped it with its hand. Rotom pinched the Jirachi and Jirahi fell down and cried and fainted.

"SAM AND REU WIN!" Admin said.

The crowd roared in excited cheering once more and confetti rained over Reu and Sam. Sam basked in his glory, showing off his guns and posing for the screen. Reu waved awkwardly.

"So. Wanna go out or something?" DryBones asked Eden.

Eden didn't respond and just walked away.

"Eden and DryBones 100 years" DryBones yelled at her.

The four walked back up to the second level.

"Nicely done, Sam. Reu go die" Stickboy complimented.  
"How can the one with the worst performance insult somebody who won?" Reu asked him.  
"You tried killing us!" Stickboy said.  
"Death...I welcome thee..." Lukeguy said.  
"Don't act so surprised. Winners never lose." Sam said.

[Sam in le confession toilet]  
"They should just hand over the million right now, there's no way any of these people are going to be able to beat me head to head. I'm the FUCKING BEST!"  
[le end]

Robot and Alice  
Vs.  
Carz and Ziggy

[Robot in le confession toilet]  
"Alice, huh? She's the one that...uh...did...the...we...who is she?"  
[le end]

[Alice in le confession toilet]  
"In a battle against Ziggy? Nice? I mean nice! That was a reference to the nice! you can give to people in X and Y. Yeah. So Robot. Possibly viable, but she's gonna cry if we lose so I weed to not screw this up. And Carz is on the other team so how hard can it that be?"  
[le end]

[Carz in le confession toilet]  
"Fuck Ret"  
[le end]

[Ziggy in le confession toilet]  
"There are normies who are like normal joes who jack off to beheadings and shit"  
[le end]

Alice and Robot stood on the left side, Carz and Ziggy on the right.  
They all tossed their Pokéballs simultaneously, a Porygon-Z releasing from Robot's ball, a Sylveon from Alice's, Sylveon from Ziggy's, and Tyrantrum from Carz. Everyone watched in amazement as Ziggy's Sylveon had red eyes and blue fur, it was a shiny. It winked at the crowd.

"Guess we'll see who's truly the real iced out Sylveon..." Ziggy said.  
"Yiff" Carz said.

"You for this?" Alice asked.  
"Yeah, I'll try not to cry about it" Robot responded.  
"Oh.." Alice replied.

They all shot their hands out commanding their Pokémon to attack.  
Alice's Sylveon closed its eye as the moon shined above in the moonlight. It shine on Tyrantrum and caused massive damage, he fell back and screamed.

"Yes that's it! Hot!" Carz said, walking over and jumping the fainted Pokémon.

J pushed his glasses up.

"A-ha! That damage was super effective because dragon is weak to fairy!" he explained.

Ziggy's Sylveon leapt over the Tyrantrum and flicked its bows. It attempted to send out an psylocke, but Porygon-Z tossed out a ball of string electricity, knocking into his Sylveon and toppling it to the ground.

"SHREKT" Carz said, throwing out his second Pokémon. A Raichu smiled to everyone.

Raichu ran over to attack Alice's Sylveon, but it touched Raichu's skin with its bows and felt around.

"My bones are made out of flesh" it whispered to him.

Ziggy's Sylveon pushed Raichu out of the way and tackled Alice's Sylveon. The two tussled on the ground, snapping at each other with their straps and throwing bites out at each other. Raichu picked himself up from the ground to see Porygon-Z standing in front of him, charging up for an attack and shaking. Raichu whacked it with its tail, rotating it around and making it blast in the wrong direction. Alice and Robot sucked so the electric beam shot over their heads. Raichu noticed a slot at Porygon-Z's rare and sent out a bolt of electricity at it, making Porygob-Z short circuit, turn off, and fall to the ground like a rock.

"What the...Porygon?" Robot asked.

"Well if you artificially make a Pokémon you gotta expect some drawbacks" Moogle said.

"Carz isn't even giving his Pokémon any orders he's over there masturbating" Alice complained.  
"It's fine. Carz won't be a problem" Robot insisted, growing out her next Pokéball, releasing a Golurk.

Golurk towered over the other Pokémon of the field, each step he took shook the floor.  
The Sylveon's were eyeing each other down. Alice's tired tackled Ziggy's but Ziggy's stepped back, tossing out his straps to latch onto Alice's Sylveon's paws and tug her forward. She bit down on the bows latched onto her and then whipped her own at him. This is more confusing than I intended.

Golurk used earthquake and shook the ground even more intensely. The two Sylveon's were knocked away from each other by the impact and Raichu was badly affected, crawling on the ground as his health depleted to red.

"Aim for the horn" Carz memed.  
"Raichu.." Raichu said, struggling to stand up.

Raichu stood on both feet, covered in bruises.

"Geez electric Pokémon can't take earthquakes for shit" Alice said.

Raichu closed his eyes and charged up power.

"RAAAAAAAI-CHUUUUU" Raichu screamed, shooting out a bolt of electricity directly say Golurk.  
"Pfft, dumb. You don't even know basic immunities?" Robot asked.

To everyone's shock, the electricity bruised Golurk horribly, shutting down all of his energy and damaging his health bar tremendously. Golurk fell forward and crashes on Raichu, both of them fainting. Everybody's jaw dropped.

"What" Alice said.

"That's not even possible" Reu said.  
"Well it happened in the anime once so" J shrugged.  
"Hmm well, it doesn't make sense game wise but it occurred in the anime so I can't dispute it" Isaac said.

[Robot in le confession toilet]  
Robot bangs her head off the wall.  
"I'm losing to CARZ"  
[le end]

"Ok this Sylveon fight is going nowhere I'll try to help you out Robit. Sylveon, return!" Alice said, letting Sylveon stand behind her awaiting to be called back.  
"Screw that you just want my Sylveon to faint first to make yours look better, Sylveon return" Ziggy said, letting his Sylveon stand behind him as well.

Alice sighed. Robot had a look of disdain upon her face. Alice put a hand on her shoulder.

"Look, Robot. I know we don't talk much, but I hear about you a lot. Don't put yourself down, if your Pokémon skills are anywhere near your Smash skills, we can dominate this game. And, Well, nobody likes a negative nancy. Let's fight with confidence" Alice said, putting her hand out.

Robot looked at it unsurely.

"Uh, alright.." Robot said, shaking her hand.

They both nodded and threw their Pokéballs onto the field.

Ziggy looked at Carz.

"Look, Carz" Ziggy began.

Carz was having sex with his Raichu.

"AAAAAAAAA FANG'S FANFICTION IS A GIFT FROM THE GODS" Carz screamed, jumping on Ziggy and biting his ear.

Ziggy and Carz both threw their Pokéballs onto the field.

Robot had a Bisharp, Alice an Azumarill, Carz a Loudred, and Ziggy a Gardevore.

"Yehehee, watch this, Ziggy said, slamming on his mega ring" Ziggy said, slamming on his mega ring. But nothing happened. Puzzled, Ziggy slammed on it again. It failed and he did it several mover times to no avail.  
"Wtf?" Ziggy asked.  
"Is your Gardevoir holding its stone?" Robot asked.  
"No...I thought everyone got one of those for free" Ziggy said.  
"No everyone else actually searched found and earned theirs they just don't pop out of thin air. Good job" Robot said.  
"Duck" Ziggy said.

Bisharp ran up to Gardevoir and swiped at her relentlessly, she kept moving left and eighth to dodge his jabs.

"WAVEDASH IT ZIGGY! WAVEDASH!" Cloud screamed.

Bisharp tore at Gardevoir's dress, tearing s large hole down the front. He peeked down and blushed, giving Gardevoir a chance to kick him back.  
Nearby, Azumarill ran up to Loudred and shot a wave of water at him, but Loudred screamed and a large sound wave emitted from his ears, knocking the water into Asumarill's face, causing her to fall on her back. Loudred walked over and aimed his ears at Azumarill, preparing to attack, but Bisharp bonked him off the head. Azumarill rolled away and quickly got to her feet. She used dazzling gleam and shot shards at Gardevoir and Loudred. While Gardevoir was shaking her head from the attack, Bisharp leapt at her and stabbed her, pushing her back and off the stage. Loudred walked over and shouted loudly, making Azumarill plug her ears in distress, but it didn't faze Bisharp.

"Ok fellas prepare for this" Ziggy said, tossing in his next Pokémon: a Gallada.

"Really? One of those trainers who use multiple of the same evolution line?" Alice asked.  
"They both look cool ok" Ziggy defended.

Bisharp went to slice Loudred, but Gallade threw out his arm in defense. Gallade and Bisharp locked eyes and engaged in combat, throwing out punched one after another and deflecting each one.  
Loudred grabbed Azumarill and screamed into its ears, making it cry. Azumarill shot FUCKING BUBBLES in Loudred's eye, making him lose his grip.

"Is he just going to scream a lot?" Alice asked.  
"I don't know what else to expect nobody ever uses Loudred" Robot said.

Gallade and Bisharp's health was slightly falling at a steady rate as they continued to clash at each other.

Loudred bit Azumarill and ripped tugged its tail until it fainted, forcing Alice to throw out her third Pokémon, Slurpuff. Slurpuff licked its lips as Loudred screamed and pumped its chest.

"Seriously this Loudred's moveset is as diverse as...uh, whatever" Alice said.  
"Wait, what was the punchline? Aren't you going to finish the joke ?" Robot asked.  
"I couldn't think of anything let's just say the halfass attempt at making a joke was the joke itself" Alice said.  
"Oh, alright. Wait, are you sure you're not just using a '"that's the joke" as a coverup?" Robot asked.  
"No just shut up and continue not to give your Pokémon commands" Alice said.

Bisharp and Gallade continued fighting, Bisharp knocked Gallade to the ground, where he kicked Bisharp and swiped at his legs. Bisharp aimed for Gallade's head but Gallade blocked it with his hands, pushing Bisharp back and jumping to his feet. Gallade swiped at Bisharp but Bisharp caught Gallade's arm and tugged him closer, where he threw a punch at the face, but Gallade ducked.

Loudred went to slam into Slurpuff, but instead he slammed into a small plushie. He picked it up and squeezed it. Above, Slurpuff slammed down on him, using drain punch and leaching health off of him. Loudred fell back, it was super effective. Loudred fell on the floor unconsciously. Slurpuff jumped up and down cheerfully. She saw a little blood on her paw and licked it. Her eyes went red as she enjoyed the taste, and bit into her paw so blood seeped out. She brought the paw to her mouth and chomped on it, sucking all the blood out. She fell down and started eating herself.

Gallade Gallade Gallade Bisharp Bisharp Gallade Bisharp Gallade Bisharp Bisharp Bisharp Gallade Bisharp Gallade Bisharp they both threw their arms out, forming an X shape. They both grunted at each other and pushed with all their might, trying to overcome the other. Gallade let go for a second and Bisharp shot forward, but Gallade wavedashed and avoided the attack. Bisharp fell to the ground and Gallade brought his arm down, stabbing him and finishing him off. Before Gallade could bask in his glory, Sylveon tackled him and knocked him out, standing in his place.

"Gasp. Sylveon Vs. Sylveon frisky!?" Ziggy asked.


	10. How to Catch Your Pokemon (Part 2)

Shiny Sylveon ran into the field. Both of them circled each other for about a minute. The crowd watched eagerly, the haikuers looked down in suspense. Both Sylvs' fur rustled from the air, their bows flower in the air majestically.

"Sylvs...sick 'em" Ziggy said.  
"Sylveon...what he said, but in a cooler way..." Alice said.

The shiny Sylveon made the first attack, pouncing on the regular Sylveon, but she quickly threw her off. As the shiny Sylveon rolled across the floor, Sylveon ran towards it. Shiny Sylveon threw out her bows and wrapped them around Sylveon's foot, pulling and knocking her down. Shiny Sylveon rolled back into her feet and pounced on Sylveon. She tied her up with her bows and started tightening the wraps. As it got tighter, Sylveon closed her eyes and a bright pink link began to glow. Shiny Sylveon was thrown off as she was struck by Psylocke. Sylveon stood up, dusting herself with her bows. Shiny Sylveon watched from the ground as Sylveon darted towards her. Shiny Sylveon shit out a Psylocke but Sylveon jumped over it, landing in shiny Sylveon, who kicked her off. Shiny Sylveon got up, as did Sylveon. The two ran towards each other and clashed. They mirrored each other as they raised their front legs and tried to knock the other down. Sylveon pushed shiny Sylveon back giving shiny Sylveon the chance to begin building up energy for her moonblast. As shiny Sylveon ascended a bit and the moon began to gleam, Sylveon threw out her bows and grabbed shiny Sylveon's bows. She tied them together and held them directly in front of shiny Sylveon. The light power rushed down from the moon to shiny Sylveon, who shot it out to hit Sylveon, but it hit the bow right in front of her and shot right back at her, knocking her down and making her faint. Sylveon lowered her bows and stood victorious.

"...what" Jp asked.  
"Come on they were different colors, it wasn't that hard to tell apart. It's not like we had to read about it" Joe said.  
"I was expecting Sylveon to win but Sylveon pulled through" Isaac said.  
"Nice joke, Isaac. Where'd you get it, the bad joke store?" Lemon asked.  
"Oh..." Isaac said.

"ALICE AND ROBOT WIN, ZIGGY AND CARZ LOSE" Admin announced.

Carz was having sex with his Loudred.

"Laaaa" Carz said.

Ziggy cried.

Sylveon winked and blew kisses at the crowd as they cheered hysterically.

"Yass, we did it Reddit" Alice said.  
"You did way better than me, you did great" Robot said.  
"Thanks, it was such hard work to stand there and tell the Pokémon what to do about 10% of the battle. But really I couldn't have done it without you Robot. I mean I probably could have but you did good" Alice said.

The four walked back up to the second level, waiting for the next match. Alice petted her Sylveon as if rested next to her.

"Welcome to the winners circle. I'm Sam, the man, I'll be your guide to what it's like to be FUCKING AWESOME. Reu doesn't count he's only here because I carried him" Sam said.

Reu banged his head off the railing.

"Two more battles left in the round...my partner will either be StarForce, Isaac, or Riley..." Lemon said.  
"Maybe we'll be paired up. Then you can out your ass in my face" Riley said excitedly.

"Hm, hm. Two more battles, eh? Saving the best for last, I see" Rydli chuckled, leaning against the wall.

[Element in le confession toilet]  
"So there are only three people left for me to possibly be paired with, and Shinxy is one of them. No, no, no, no nooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"  
[le end]

The icons in the big screen scrolled between the remaining 8 haikuers. Lemon, Riley, Isaac, StarForce, Element, Shinxy, Rydli, and Pantz all watched nervously.

It stopped on four haikuers, deciding the contenders for match 7.

StarForce and Riley  
Vs.  
Element and Shinxy

Element woke up from his nap.

"Huh? Oh it's my turn great, I can stop skipping through everything" Element said, looking at the screen.

"Again? Paired with Shinxy again? Ahhhh" Element groaned.

Shinxy just looked down quietly.

"Who is Riley?" StarForce asked.  
"GenesisFrenzy. YouTube star? Geez, I've been here for like three months..." Riley groaned.

"So we're gonna be partners in the last match..." Lemon said, looking over at Rydli and Pantz, who were standing away from each other.  
"Yeah" Isaac said.

"So the two doofuses are up. Can't wait to see you fail" Shadow said evily.  
"Shadow save the smack talk for the fight" Riley said, stuffing him in his backpack so his head stuck out.

StarForce, Riley, Element, and Shinxy all walked down to the arena for the battle. StarForce and Riley on the left, Element and Shinxy on the right.  
Element looked over at Shinxy, who was focused on the floor.

"Shinxy, you okay? You haven't been over me since we entered this place, and you haven't been spouting racial slurs either" Element said.  
"I'm fine" Shinxy said.

"So, like, I have a channel. I post video game stuff there" Riley explained.  
"Sounds cool c:" StarForce said.  
"Wow, that c: really spoke to me. It's not every day somebody goes out their way to express their appreciation for me. You, my friend, are a friend." Riley said, pulling him in for a hug.  
"Throw your ball, idiot" Shadow scoffed.  
"Ok GOSH..." Riley said, reaching for his ball.

The four threw their Pokéballs out, each releasing a Pokémon. StarForce released a Latias, Riley an Alakazam, Element a Glaceon, and Shinxy a Vaporeon.

"Aww, they have matchies~" J said

"Really Shinxy?" Element groaned.  
"Sorry." Shinxy answered flatly.

Element looked at Shinxy with concern.

"Come on, you're not even going to blush or giggle like you usually do? Why are you acting so not weird?" Element asked.  
"Idk" Shinxy replied.

"Hey I know just the thing to take care of them, Latias return" StarForce commanded, sticking his Pokéball out and sucking the eon Pokémon back in.

StarForce threw out a different Pokéball, releasing a Pikachu.

"You didn't evolve your Pikachu?" Riley asked.  
"Well it might forget me if I did that..." StarForce said.

"Glaceon ice shard!" Element shouted.

Glaceon ran up to the middle of the ring and her fur blew with the wind as shards of ice summoned around her, she flung them directly at Alakazam and Pikachu. The two braced themselves.

"Alakazam, Psychic! Fuck his ass oooooo" Riley said.

Alakazam closed his eyes and twirled his spoons. He pressed his fingers to his temple and telepathically lifted himself above the ground a bit. He concentrated his mind to shoot or a beam of psychic energy, striking Glaceon and knocking her to the ground.

Element tapped Shinxy's arm.

"Come on Shinxy you need to make Vaporeon do something" Element said.  
"Oh. Vaporeon use bubblebeam" Shinxy said unenthusiastically.

Vaporeon roared and shot out a succession of bubbles at Alakazam, they all popped off him and made him blink.

"Pikachu, thunder!" StarForce said.  
"PIKACHU" Pikachu screamed in a deep masculine voice, summoning a thunder cloud over Vaporeon's head and striking lightning directly onto her, knocking her out immediately.

"Stop sucking Shinxy and Element" Moogle screamed down.

Element growled, Shinxy stayed unresponsive.

"Coke on Shinxy you're not even going to make a sucking joke?" Element asked disappointingly.  
"Just focus on the game, Elemeg..." Shinxy said, throwing out his next ball.

The ball snapped open and Furret jumped out.

"Hammy memories..." Element said.

Furret scurried over to Pikachu and whacked him with her tail, then buried her face in her tail timidly. Pikachu jumped on Furret and started gnawing on her face, electrocuting her.

"BLIZZARD" Element shouted.

Large amounts of dust and ice began to form in the air near Element and Shinxy, it buildup and whisked forward from Glaceon and struck Alakazam and knocked Pikachu off of Furret. Pikachu tried standing up but Furret slapped it and it fainted.

"What? Fainted already?" StarForce asked.  
"Well what do you expect when you use a Pokémon that isn't fully evolved" Riley said.

StarForce threw his his next Pokémon, calling out Dragonite, as Alakazam levitated Glaceon and Furret with his telekinesis. Alakazam snapped his spoon to throw them backwards. They both landed roughly in their feet.

"Glaceon blizzard again" Element commanded, and the storm overtook Dragonite and Alakazam. It was enough to knock Alakazam out and leave Dragonite in the red zone.  
"Damn.." Riley said.

Dragonite picked Glaceon up and snapped it's back, tossing her on the floor and then sitting on her. Furret scurried over to help and jumped at Dragonite, bouncing off his belly and falling back to the ground.

Riley and Element both threw Pokéballs out, Entei coming out of Riley's and Nintetails out of Element's.

"Ninetales fire blast" Element said, and Ninetales raised the nine tails and shot of a blast of fire. It struck Dragonite and knocked him down.

Entei leaped over Dragonite's body and gave a mighty roar, his mane blew widely as a storm of fire rose behind him, striking Furret and knocking her off the stage.

"Ugh" Element complained.  
"Get SHREKT" Riley laughed.

"Dumbass furries" Rydli mocked.

"I'm not even the one screwing up!" Element defended.

StarForce and Shinxy both threw out their last Pokémon, for StarForde a Latias what a surprise! And Shinxy a Luxray who saw that coming!

Entei stepped up to Luxray, building up fire power around itself. It charged up and went to attack but Ninetales pushed Luxray out of the way, letting the fire hit her instead and barely take damage. Ninetales ran up and whacked its head off Entei. Latias flew over and then looked up the sky, a bunch of meteors fell from the sky and smecked Nintetales, each one bringing more pain. Nintetales tried to stand up but a final meteor bonked off her head and knocked her out.

"Boo you guys suck" Cloud chanted.

Shinxy continued looking down solemnly. Element glanced over and watched Riley and StarForce exchange a fist bump. Element grabbed Shinxy's arm.

"Shinxy, what's up?" Element asked.  
"HshaiAjabsj" Shinxy replied.  
"Fair enough I shouldn't have expected you to be able to form a sentence. Look, I'm sorry about what I said. Sometimes your racial slurs and spamming can get annoying but that doesn't mean I hate you. I know what it's like to feel like everyone is against you, you feel excluded and everyone is always calling you an idiot. Regardless of what happens, you've always been nice to me, and I won't let them keep you down. No matter what happens I'll always be your friend" Element said.

Shinxy moved his eyes from the ground to Element's.

"Come on, we have something to prove" Element said.

Shinxy nodded, and they both faced Riley and StarForce. Element threw out his last Pokéball to unleash his own Luxray. The two Luxray stood side by side as the Entei and StarForce began building up power.

The Luxray split into two opposite directions. Entei and StarForce eyed them as they ran, building up electricity that ran through their fur.

"Hey, check this out" StarForce said, pulling his sleeve down to reveal his mega ring. He pressed down on it and Latias began flowing, a thin line of shining light forming an X shape shined out of its stone, it grew large wings and the skin tone turned to a purple its color. It screamed its cry as it finished mega evolving. As Entei was watching the scene, Shinxy's Luxray tacked him. The Luxray pinned him down and started charging electricity trough is fur. As Luxray released its electricity in a ball of light, Entei pushed him off, knocking the Luxray to its back. The electric shock flew past Entei, but was transferred to Element's Luxray, who was standing right behind him. Element's Luxray released a beam of electricity, shocking Entei all over. Entei snorted steam through its nose in anger, and leaped on the Luxray, butting his head off him.

The Latias zoomed past Shinxy's Luxray, making a U-Turn to rush at it. The Luxray ducked and the Mega Latias flew right over him, crashing into Entei. Entei fell on his face, where Element's Luxray rammed into him. Shinxy's Luxray jumped onto him, and both Luxray shit electricity out and electrocuted Entei, making him faint.

"One left..." Riley said, tossing his Pokéball out.

Shaymin came out.

"Shaymin? Why?" StarForce asked.  
"Because he's the closest thing I could find to Sonic" Riley said.

"Ok seriously they've used like three legendaries this is bullshit" Element complained.

"Did you at least get that flower thing to make it transform into the cool version?" StarForce asked.  
"No I didn't know where to find one I'm not that into Pokémon" Riley said.

Element's Luxray pounced on the Shaymin, picking it up with its mouth and swallowing it whole. Everyone gasped.

"Don't jack off Element" Nicholas yelled down.

"I wasn't going to! Ugh...hey Shinxy did you record that Shaymin being eaten?" Element whispered.  
"yis" Shinxy replied.  
"Yes" Element said.

The two Luxray stood side by side once more, their tails wrapping around each other as they rubbed against each other. The Mega Latias floated down in front of them both, staring them down with a glare. The Luxray built up electricity in their fur as they continued to rub, lowering down they got ready to pounce. As the two Luxray jumped at him, the Mega Latios did a full spin, whacking them both away with its tail. The two Luxray landed on their feet. They charged at Mega Latias once more, who started building up power. It released a hyper beam directed at them both, but they split left and right and narrowly missed the beam, letting it brush off their fur. Electricity flowed down them as they leaped at Mega Latias, who ducked, letting the Luxray knock into each other. As they landed on the ground and shook their heads in dizziness, Mega Latias flew straight at them. Shinxy's Luxray rushed at Element's and knocked him out of the way. Mega Latias collided with Shinxy's Luxray, the Luxray's body was pressed against the Latias' nose as it zoomed across the stage, coming to a complete stop near the edge of the arena and letting the Luxray fly off, crashing into the wall. The Luxray fell to the ground and struggled to get up.

"Shinxy..." Element said, looking over.

Shinxy looked over at Element.

"Nigger."

Element nodded.

StarForfe stood back. He and his Mega Latias locked eyes and he nodded.

"You got this?" Riley asked.  
"Let's find out." StarForce said.

The haikuers all watched from the balcony.

"Goodra, Latias, memes" Nicholas said.

Moogle pressed his hand against his chin in anticipation.  
Pseudonym walker towards the railing to get a better look.  
Rydli crossed his arms.  
Gingerale gritted his teeth.  
Cloud yawned.

The Mega Latias floated slowly towards the remaining Luxray, who growled at the Mega Latias and dug its foot into the ground, building up power for a rush.  
The Mega Latias slowly raised its rear, ready to attack. It started vibrating violently as sparks of Electricity fell from Luxray's black fur. The cheeks of Luxray heated up.

"RUSH HIM" STARForce ordered.

The Mega Latias took off in flight, zooming towards Luxray. Luxray leaped towards the Mega Latias for a pounce. The Latias flew faster than Luxray jumped, so Luxray went over the Mega Latias, but the static of Luxray's fur clung onto Latias and he latched himself on, trying his tail to Latias'.  
The Mega Latias zoomed past Shinxy and Element, who both ducked. The Latias flew by so fast the wind carrying with it knocked Element's fedora off. The Mega Latias was nearing the wall of the stadium when it made a sharp turn, now flying on the edge of the wall, Luxray clinging on tightly. Luxray slammed its head down and screamed, sending out a blast of electricity that shocked Mega Latias' entire body. The Mega Latias gritted its teeth and flew faster. The Luxray struggled to hold on as it began to lose its grip, Luxray slipped slowly off the Latias, but held on tightly and tried pulling himself closer to Mega Latias' head. The Luxray's fur was sticking up and blowing crazily from the wind. It roared and let out another blast of electricity, shocking Mega Latias' entire body once more. Mega Latias started to pant, it took another sharp turn and headed for the stage. As it increased speed and got to the center of the arena it took another turn and headed directly upwards, quickly flying past the ceiling and exiting the PWT, flying high up in the sky. Luxray started to slip some more, falling down to Mega Latias' lower body. Luxray bit down on Mega Latias and erupted the body with electricity for a third time. Mega Latias came to a complete stop, falling down. The brake caused Luxray to fly off, and the two started to fall down separately. Mega Latias tried to regain control and descend gently, but Luxray was tumbling down in circles. It tried to retain a focused direction, stopping the rotating and staring down as it for closer to the ground. The Mega Latias was at the foot of the stadium, everyone watched as it charged up a hyper beam and shot out of its mouth. The Luxray fell through the roof of the stadium as the hyper beam shot up to him. The Luxray closed its eyes and lit his entire body into a flow of electricity. The Luxray fell into the hyper beam, which the Latias shot out more powerfully and concentrated, but the veil of electricity surrounding the Luxray allowed it to pull through. Luxray gritted his teeth and tried to handle the blast flowing through him. The unstable electricity emitting from the Luxray pushed further into the blast, the distance between the Mega Latias and Luxray decreasing into meters and now feet.  
Everyone watched in anticipation. The crowd was silent, the haikuers were in shock. Riley, StarForce, Element, and Shinxy all had swear down their backs. The Luxray pushed more, the electric veil starting to diminish. Mega Latias closed its eyes and roared harder to build more power into the hyper beam. The Luxray screamed as he pushed further into the blast, closing in on Mega Latias. The two's heads met and the electric spark and hyper beam collided, a bust of smoke blew all throughout the stadium. Everyone covered themselves to protect themselves from the smoke. The smoke blew out the rooftop of stadium and faded in the air. The collected dust blew forcefully across the field, knocking Riley, StarForce, Element, and Shinxy all off. They coughed and got up to see the Mega Latias and Luxray both collapsed on the ground, laying on each other.

"Holy poop" StarForce said.

The Luxray twitched and used all of its strength to raise up, letting the Latias' body fall to the ground as it stood in all fours and gave out a weak cry.

"YES" Element said.

The crowd exploded in cheers and confetti rained down on Element and Shinxy.

"Awww" StarForce sighed.

"ELEMENT AND SHINXY WIN" Admin declared.

Shinxy hugged Element and Element smiled, accepting the embrace. He ran onto the stage and hugged his Luxray, ruffling its fur.

"The remaining four haikuers, please come down" Admin requested.

Lemon, Isaac, Pantz, and Rydli, the four players not to go yet, all walked down, except for Rydli who slipped out of his wheelchair and crashed down the stairs. Lemon and Isaac stood on the left, Pantz and Rydli stood in the right.

"This should be cool" Lemon said.  
"Yeah, like, yeah" Isaac said.

Rydli and Pantz didn't make eye contact.

[Rydli in le confession toilet]  
"I don't exactly trust Pantz. Let's just say I discovered something sneaky she did"  
[le end]

[Pantz in le confession toilet]  
"Ugh, Rydli...the man could use a chill pill. I...did something I wasn't expecting him to find out about...so now he doesn't trust me at all. Now I feel like he'll try to get rid of me the next chance he gets..."  
[le end]

"Begin!" Imboo said.

The four all whirled out their Pokéballs simultaneously, Lemon releasing a Swampert, Isaac an Arceus, Rydli a Blaziken, and Pantz a Smeargle.

"Jesus...I mean Arceus, that's a mighty strong Pokémon" Lemon noted.  
"Thanks." Isaac said.

"Seriously? I mean seriously?" Pantz asked.  
"It's fine. Check this" Rydli smirked, revealing his mega pendant sitting on his necklace.  
"Wow so there are versions other than a bracelet" Pantz said.

Rydli slammed his mega ring and the Blaziken transformed, pumping its fists and roaring as it mega evolved into Mega Blaziken. It stood on one foot as fire flower down his legs.

"I hope he doesn't have speed boost..." Lemon said.  
"You have a Swampert...it's water...and ground..." Isaac said.  
"Oh yeah" Lemon laughed.

Lemon slammed down on his mega ring, and Swampert pumped his chest and roared as it mega evolved into Mega Swampert.

"Go get him, buddy" Lemon pointed.

Swampert ran out to attack Blaziken, but Blaziken jumped on Swampert's head and over him, running up to Arceus and throwing out a multiple number of punches. Everyone watched the Arceus' health drop to the yellow bar. Arceus roared so mighty the wind around them all blew firefly. It threw out a forceful attack and pushed Blaziken back, lowering its health slowly with judgement.

"Hah. A normal type move on a fighting type Pokémon? Didn't think my that through" Rydli mocked.

Smeargle picked his tail up and wagged it, sketching the move he just witnessed and adding Judgement to his moveset. Swampert rushed at Smargle and knocked him down, his health lowering drastically. Smeargle for up and used Judgement on Swampert, the blast was strong enough to knock Swampert out.

"What!" Lemon said.

Mega Blaziken's speed increases even more, and it struck Arceus with another powerful array of punches, making the Pokémon fall to the ground federated. Mega Blaziken stood victorious as Lemon and Isaac's jaws dropped.

"Holy crap. Alright Isaac what do you got next?" Lemon asked.  
"This" Isaac said as the two tossed their Pokéballs out.

A large Kroonodile came out of Lemon's ball, crossing his arm and eyeing his opponents defiantly. From Isaac was a Stunfisk, which flopped around gasping for air. Krookodile ran over to attack Blaziken, but the Pokémon lowered itself and shot it's leg out, sweeping Krookodile off his feet and tripping him. As Krookodile fell to the ground, Mega Blaziken built up power in his leg and struck him with a powerful kick, knocking Krookodile back and tossing him into Lemon, who held him in his arms as he fainted. Stunfisk flipped over to Smeargle, who picked it up and punched it, defeating it.

"Uh, maybe if you give a speech to me it will make it dramatic and give us power?" Isaac suggested.  
"Alright, I like lemons. You like Isaac's. Together, nothing can take us down" Lemon said.

They both threw out their last renaming Pokéball, unleashing Helioisk from Lemon's ball and Weavile from Isaac. They both ran out to Mega Blaziken and Smeargle. Mega Blaziken felt the speed rushing through him, the power building up. He charged up an attack and shot out a blast of fire, whacking Weavile and knocking it out immediately. Helioisk crawled underneath Blaziken and its neck popped out as it hissed, slapping the ground with his tail and causing an earthquake. As le ground shook violently, Smeargle leapt on Helioisk, punching him and bringing them both to the ground. Mega Blaziken's health quickly dropped but before it reached zero, Helioisk was pinned to the ground by Smeargle. Mega Blaziken slowly walked over, having an opportunity to strike.

"No..." Lemon said.

Mega Blaziken raised its leg. Helioisk struggled, trying to escape Smeargle's hold, but he Smeargle held him tightly. Mega Blaziken brought his leg down and stomped on Helioisk hard enough to knock him out, Helipisk screamed as he dropped his head and his eyes closed.

"Why..." Lemon said, running out to grab his Pokémon.

"Geez..." Pantz said.

Everyone in the stands had their jaws dropped.

"Damn." Marrowksy said.

"With a 6-0 victory, Rydli and Pantz sweep Lemon and Isaac and finish off round 1! 16 haikuers remain to battle, 8 pairs to face off. It only gets more intense from here!" Admin announced.

"Sorry Lem" Isaac said.  
"Man..." Lemon sighed.

Rydli and Pantz walked back up to the stands.

Gingerale and Nicholas, Shinxy and Element, Berserker and J, Jp and Joe, Reu and Sam, Mr. Moogle and Pseudonym , Robot and Alice, Rydli and Pantz. Only half of these pairs will make it to round 3. Get ready guys, the next round begins in 30 minutes.

"We got this" Gingerale said confidently.  
"Pfft" Sam rolled his eyes.  
"So excited! Rydli and Pantz look strong, hope we get to fight them!" J said.  
"They wouldn't fare so well against us..." Berserker said.  
"I won't let you down this time. My strategy will be on point" Robot said.  
"Whatever dude" Alice replied.

"Nice, so all the good players plus Element and Shinxy made it to the second round" Moogle said.  
"Thanks" Element said.

Shinxy rubbed his head on Element's chest.

"Lets try to get another sweep" Rydli said to Pantz, not making eye contact.  
"Maybe" Pantz said.  
"HIPE WE FOGHT NIXHOALS" Joe shouted.  
"I'll show off my Rosea" Jp said.

"Alright, get ready everyone" Admin said, directing them towards the jumbo screen.

The screen scrolled through the remaining 16 icons, and they all watched eagerly, awaiting their opponent. Some were hoping not to get a certain pair, while others were hoping to get a certain pair.

"Now for a twist" Admin said, clapping his hands.

Ding!

"Oh..." J said.  
"Damn it can't we just get this moving faster?" Element asked.  
"Just a little something to spice things up. This round will be a musical round. But instead of making up your own badly written songs-"  
"Ok we have to make lyrics up on the spot do you expect us to be geniuses?" Jp asked.  
"Sssssh! Anyways, this song will be a karaoke session. Each match will use lyrics from a different Pokémon theme. Sing along as your Pokémon duke it out." Admin said.  
"What if we forget the lyrics to a song?" Alice asked.  
"We'll have the words on the screen to help out, but your neck is strained from looking up too long, or if it's, like, distracting from the battle, just shout out things about friendship togetherness destiny and scream "Pokémon!" at the end of it and it will likely be the correct lyrics anyways." Admin said.  
"Question. Are we doing the regular theme or the movie themes?" J asked.  
"I don't know J do you think we'll be singing the iconic theme songs or the less popular less known movie themes that are basically the same song but remixed?" Gingerale asked.  
"Don't be a snappy Sarah jeers!" J complained.

The icons stopped on the screen and the match was decided.

"Ok guys hop to it" Admin said.

[Song #12 Pokémon Medley]

The losers watched from the second floor as the second round took off.

GingeraleDragon and Nicholas stood on the opposite side of Element and Shinxy in the arena.

Berserker and J stood on the opposite side of Jp and Joe.

Reu and Sam stood on the opposite side of Mr. Moogle and Pseudonym.

Robot and Alice stood on the opposite side of Rydli and Pantz.

They all threw out their Pokéballs and began to sing.

-  
Alice: I wanna be the very best, like no one ever was

(Alice's Noivern swipes at Rydli's Alakazam and Alakazam backs up to dodge it)

Robot: To catch them is my real test, to train them is my cause

(Porygon-Z shoots an electric blast at Pantz' Smeargle, who shakes it off and continues to battle)

Pantz: I will travel across the land, searching far and wide

(Smeargle jumped on Noivern and whacks his tail off its head)

Rydli: Each Pokémon, to understand, the power that's inside

(Alakazam shoots a psychic blast at Noivern, who shakes off Smeargle. Smargle falls on the ground and faints)

J: Everybody wants to be a master, everybody wants to show their skills

(J's Tentacruel wrapped its tentacles around Empoleon's legs, tugging on them and knocking Empoleon on his back)

Berserker: Everybody wants to get their faster, make their way to the top of the hill

(Berserker's Gourgeist shout vines out at Empoleon, dealing enough damage to make it faint)

Joe: EACH TIME, YOU TRY! Come again, just a little bit better

(Joe throws out a Slaking)

Jp: EACH STEP, YOU CLIMB! Is one more step, up the latter

(Jp's Accelgor runs over and whacks Tentacruel)

Pantz: POKÉMON! Gotta catch 'em all

(Pantz throws out a Barbarcle)

Rydli: It's you and me

(Alakazam kicks at Porygon-Z, banging their heads together)

Rydli and Pantz: I know it's my destiny

(Barbarcle swipes at Noivern, who whacks him with its wings)

Alice: POKÈMON! Oh you're my best friend

(Noivern flys by Alakazm and kicks him to the floor)

Robot and Alice: In a world we must defend

(Barbarcle shoots rocks at Porygon-Z, Porygon-Z malfunctions and faints)

Joe: It's a whole new world we live in

(Slaking yawns and drifts off to sleep in the midst of battle)

J and Berseker: Do-do-do-do, do-do-do-doo

(Gourgeist and Tentacruel attack Slaking)

Jp: It's a whole new way to see

(Accelgor tugs on Tentacruel's tentacles)

J and Berseker: Do-do-do-do, do-do-do-doo

(Gourgeist smacks Accelgor off)

Joe: It's a whole new place

(Slaking wakes up and grabs Gourgeist, scratching his butt with it)

Jp: With a brand new attitude

(Accelgor wraps around Tentacruel's tentacles, trying them up and making it fall down)

J: But you still gotta catch 'em all

(Tentacruel spits bubbles at Accelgor, which burns his eyes)

Berserker: And be the best that you can be

(Accelgor kicks Tentacruel and knocks him out)

GingeraleDragon: Sometimes it's hard to know, which way you're supposed to go

(Gingerale's Swampert and Nicholas' Ampharos stood directly across from Element's Volcarana and Shinxy's Lickitung)

Nicholas: But deep inside, you know you're strong, if you follow your heart you can't be wrong

(The four all started running for each other)

Element: Sometimes it's hard to see, just what's your destiny

(Volcarana flapped its wings and sent out a gust, Ampharos rode atop Swampert who rushed towards them)

Shinxy: But when you find, that path that's true, you will know it's the one for you

(Lickitung ran towards Swampert)

Sam: Walking down this endless highway, nothing but my friends beside me

(Sam's Venasaur sits on its ass)

Reu: We'll never give in we'll never rest

(Reu's Reuniclus floated over near Moogle's Talonflame and Pseudonym's Heracross, shooting out psychic beams)

Sam and Reu: Advanced battle is the ultimate test

(Heracross stabbed its horn inside Reuniclus' cell, making it ooze out liquid until it fell down and died)

Mr. Moogle: From the earth, the land, the sea, and sky

(Talonflame flew over to Venusaur and shot out a large amount of fire until Venusaur fainted)

Pseudonym: They can never win but they sure can try

(Pseudonym gave his Heracross a high five)

Gingerale: STAND UP! For what is right  
Crowd: (stand up!)

(Ampharos leaped off of Swampert and curled up as if sent out a large shock of electricity, striking Volcarana)

Element: BE BRAVE! Get ready to fight  
Crowd: (be brave!)

(Volcarana sent out a blast of fire at Amoharos, knocking it behind Swampert, who kept running)

Shinxy: HOLD ON! We're friends for life  
Crowd: (hold on!)

(Lickitung leapt in front of Volcarana as Seampert arrived, sending out a late beam of water that knocked both Lickitung and Volcarana down)

Nicholas: And if we come, together as one. Complete the quest, that we begun. We will win the battle,

(As Volcarana and Lickitung tried to get up, Swampert and Ampharos both built up water and electric power, shooting at them and knocking them out)

Gingerale, Element, Shinxy, and Nicholas: Pokémon

-

Reu: Oooooooh

(Reu threw out a Gliscor)

Sam: I'm unbeatable

(Sam threw out a Rotom)

Reu: Pokémon

(Gliscor stabbed at Heracross, knocking it down)

Reu and Sam: ADVANCED BATTLE!

(Rotom used thunder on Talonflame, making the Pokémon fall to the ground and faint)

Mr. Moogle: Oooooooh

(Heracross got up and swiped its horn at Gliscor, who used his tail to protect himself)

Pseudonym: I'm undefeatable

(Heracross pulled on Gliscor's tail, bringing him to the floor)

Mr. Moogle: From the stairs and the ancient past

(Heracross built up power in his horn, but Gliscor flew up speedily, Herscross latched onto his tail)

Pseudonym: They come to play but they'll never last

(Gliscor flew around in circles for a bit before abruptly stopping, letting Heracross fly off hit a wall, fainting)

Robot: POKÉMON! Gotta catch 'em all

(Robot throws out a Magmortar)

Alice: A heart so true

(Alakazam shoots a blast at Noivern, who who whacks it with its wings and shoots it back at him, knocking him out)

Rydli: Our courage will pull us through

Pantz: You teach me and I'll teach you  
(Barbarcle shoots rocks at Magmortar, knocking it to the ground)

Rydli: POKÉMON!

(Rydli throws out an Aeigslash)

Pantz: Gotta catch 'em all

Alice: Gotta catch 'em all

-

Shinxy: Woo-hoo

(Element throws out Breloom, Shinxy throws out Mightyena)

Element: The time is now the game's begun, together we will fight as one

(Breloom punches at Swampert, who returns with a lunch on his own. Breloom whacks him with his tail, incoming him down)

Nicholas: Each of us, in our own way

(Ampharos runs in front of Swampert to protect him but Mightyena tackles Ampharos out of the way, biting down on Ampharos' neck)

Gingerale: To make this world a better place

(Swampert gets up but Breloom sends a storm of leaves at him, knocking him out)

J: Everybody wants to make a statement, everybody needs to carve their mark

(J throws out an Espeon)

Berserker: To stand alone in the victory circle. State their claim when the music starts

(Gourgeist smacks Accelgor, who returns with a headbutt)

Joe: Give it all! You've got!

(Slaking sits on Espeon)

Jp: You can be the very best ever

(Accelgor whacks his entire body at Gourgeist, pushing him to the ground and making it faint)

Joe: Take your! Best shot!

(Espeon uses psychic to pick Slaking up and toss him away)

Jp: Watch and we'll learn, we'll come together

(Accelgor and Slaking stand next to each other and run side by side to attack)

Mr. Moogle: Oooooh, I'm unbeatable

(Mr. Moogle threw out a Scizor)

Pseudonym: Pokémon

(Pseudonym threw out an Absol)

Sam and Reu: Advanced battle!

(Sam and Reu pointed at their opponents, commanding Gliscor and Rotom to attack)

Sam: Ooooooh, I'm undefeatable

(Scizor and Gliscor flew up near each other, throwing swipes at each other)

Reu: You think you'll win, but soon you'll see, you may beat some, but you can't beat me

(Scizor clamps down on Gliscor's head and continues snapping at him, throwing him to the ground as he faints)

Nicholas: STAND UP! For what is right  
Crowd: (stand up!)

(Gingerale sends out Tyranitar, who charges for the Pokes)

Gingerale: BE BRAVE! Get ready to fight  
Crowd: (be brave!)

(Mightyena holds Ampharos down, but Ampharos electrocutes Mightyena and causes him to faint)

Shinxy: HOLD ON! We're friends for life  
Crowd: (hold on!)

(Tyranitar stomps the ground and shakes it as Ampharos jumps forward)

Element: And if we come, together as one. Complete the quest, that we begun. We will win the battle,

(Breloom tackles Ampharos midair, Ampharos tries electrocute Breloom but Breloom whacks its head with his tail, then kicks Ampharos in the belly with both his feet)

Gingerale, Element, Shinxy, and Nicholas: POKÉMON!

(Ampharos bounces off the ground, unable to battle)

Berserker: It's a whole be world we live in

(Berserker throws out Drapion)

Joe and Jp: Do-do-do-do, do-do-do-doo  
(Slaking punches Espeon)

J: It's a whole new way to see

(Espeon shoots a psychic beam at Slaking, knocking him to the ground)

Joe and Jp: Do-do-do-do, do-do-do-doo

(Accelgor dodges all of Drapion's jabs)

Berserker: It's a whole new place

(Drapion successfully stabs Accelgor and poisons him)

J: With a brand new attitude

(Slaking jumps at Drapion and tries to pump both fists off it, but Drapion holds Slaking's fiats away from him)

Jp: But you still gotta catch 'em all

(Accelgor faints and Jp raises her next Pokéball)

Joe: And be the best that you can be

(Slaking and Drapion eye each other down, holding each other's arms to prevent them from attacking)

Jp: Oh, oh, we've come so far

(Jp throws out Escalviar)

Joe: We fought so hard to get where we are

(Escalviar sticks its arm between Slaking and Drapion, separating each other and knocking them both to the ground)

Reu: My whole life has lead to this, time to test my skills

(Reu throws out a Metagross)

Sam: And I know I just can't miss, gonna show the world

(Absol tackles Rotom and Rotom faints)

Nicholas: If you're strong, you'll survive, and you'll keep your dream alive

(Nicholas sends out Goodra)

Gingerale: Be the best you can be, and find your destiny

(Tyranitar roars as a sandstorm brews from behind him)

Alice: I'm gonna be the very best

(Aeigslash slashes at Noivern, knocking it out)

Robot: 'Cause all I got to do is believe in me

(Magmortar dodges a rock blast from Barbarcle)

J: We all live, in a Pokémon world

(Escalviar jabs at Espeon, knocking her down and making her faint)

Berserker: Po-ké-mon

(Drapion jumps over Escalviar and builds up power on its horns)

J: I wanna be, the greatest master of them all!

(J throws or Umbreon)

Element: We are together now

(Element throws out Luxray)

Shinxy: Friends forever now

(Shinxy throws out Luxray)

Element: Whatever comes our way

(The two run into battle, charging up electricity)

Shinxy: We won't run away

(Goodra tries to attack Luxray but Lixray whacks if backwards with its tail)

Mr. Moogle: I wanna be a hero

(Sam throws out Ambipom, who runs up and slaps Scizor)

Pseudonym: Pokémon advanced

(Scizor collapses and faints)

Mr. Moogle: I wanna be a hero

(Mr. Moogle throws out Conkeldurr)

Pseudonym: Give me just one chance

(Metagross builds up psychic energy and shoot it out, Conkeldurr blocks it with his block.

Pantz: We will be heroes

(Barbarcle runs up to Magmortar and slashes at it, but Magmortar punches Barbarcle in defense)

Rydli: We can change the world if we try

(Alice throws out a Hawlucha)

Pantz: I go where you go

(Hawlucha jumps in the air and bodyslams Barbarcle, knocking him out)

Rydli: Forever friends, you and I

(Aeigslash runs over and stabs at Hawlucha, who deflects each attack)

Rydli: Every challenge along the way, with courage I will face.

(Aeigslash continues stabbing at Hawlucha, who dodges each swipe)

Pantz: I will battle every day, to claim my rightful place

(Pantz throws out a Gogoat)

Alice: Come with me, the time is right

(Hawlucha backs up)

Robot: There's no better team

(Magmortar aims at Gogoat and Aeigislash)

Alice: Arm in arm, we'll win the fight

(Magmortar and Hawlucha join hands)

Robot: It's always been our dream!

(Magmortar takes a firey shot at Aeigislash, knocking it out)

-

J: It's a whole new world we live in

(Drapion jumps on Escalbiar, who stabs into him and then throws him off and makes him crash on the ground and faint)

Berserker: It's a whole new way to see

(Umbreon shoots a large dark pulse at Slaking, making him fall down and collapse on Eacalbiar, incoming them both out)

Joe: It's a whole new place,

(Jp and Joe state Berserker and J down)

Jp: With a brand new attitude

(Berserker, Jp, and Joe reach for their Pokéballs)

J: But you

Berserker: Still gotta

(Berserker throws out Pyroar)

Jp: Catch 'em

(Jp throws out Arcanine)

Joe: ALL

(Joe throws out Swellow)

Element: Just when it seems that you are lost and all alone

(Element's Luxray lays down, and Shinxy's Luxray jumps on it for a boost, jumping st Tyranitar and Goodra)

Shinxy: You will find the courage and the strength to carry on

(Shinxy's Luxray releases a bolt of electricity at Goodra, and Goodra falls down and faints)

Nicholas: And if you fall along the way

(Tyranitar grabs Luxray and prepares to crush it)

Gingerale: Have the faith you'll be okay

(Element's Luxray tackles Tyranitar in his stomach, knocking him backwards)

Element: 'Cause your friends are there for you,

(The two Luxray scratch as Tyranitar until he faints)

Shinxy: Reachin' out to pull you through

(Nicholas throws out Grovyle, Gingerale throws out Salamence)

Alice: POKÉMON

(Rydli throws out a Blaziken)

Robot: It's you and me

(Gogoat rams its head into Magmortar, knocking it out)

Alice: I know it's my destiny

(Hawlucha leaps at Blaziken, but he quickly steps at the way and makes Hawlucha crash into the ground)

Rydli: POKÉMON

(Robot throws out a Genesect, whose eyes gleam in the light)

Pantz: Oh, you're my best friend, in a world we must defend

(Gogoat rushes at Genesect, who shoots at its feet and causes it to trip)

Robot: POKÉMON

(Rydli slams down on his mega ring)

Rydli: A HEART SO TRUE

(Mega Blaziken twirls around as a large light rushes through him, fire extends throughout his body and all of his stats are increased. Mega Blaziken emerged and he stands on one leg prepared to fight)

Alice and Robot: Our courage will pull us through

(Genesect and Hawlucha back up)

Rydli and Pantz: You teach me and I'll teach you

(Gogoat slams into Hawluxha, knocking him out)

-

Pseudonym: There's a feeling deep inside me. And it's always there to guide me

(Ambipom slaps Absol over and over again with both hands one after another until Absol falls down and faints)

Sam: It's in my heart and in my soul. Leading me to the ultimate goal

(Pseudo throws out Blastoise)

Mr. Moogle: You can try your best, this might be fun

Conkeldurr throws his two cylinder blocks at Ambipom, and Ambipom faints.

Reu: You'll go down to defeat before you've begun

Metagross send a psychic blast toward Conkeldurr as he's open, knocking him down and out.

Gingerale and Nicholas: STAND UP!

(Gingerale and Nicholas point their fingers at be Luxray and Grovyle and Salamence release a blast of power)

J and Berserker: It's a whole new world we live in

(Arcanine tackles Unbreon, pinning him to the ground and director a flamethrower straight at him, knocking him out)

Gingerale and Nicholas: For what is right

(The Luxray are knocked down, but fight it and run for Grovyle and Salamence)

Jp and Joe: It's a whole new world to see

(Pyroar jumps on Swellow, who tries flying away, but the weight of Pyroar makes it crash into a wall as Pyroar jumps off safely. Swellow faints)

Shinxy and Element: BE BRAVE

(Element's Luxray jumps at Grovyle, who swipes at it with his claws, while Shinxy's Luxray jumps on Salamence's back and bites at its neck)

Reu and Sam: Oh oh-oh-oh-oh-oh I'm undefeatable

(Metagross digs its legs into the ground, shaking it violently and making Blastoise fall)

Shinxy and Element: Get ready to fight

(Grovyle slices a bunch at Luxray, who powers through it all to electrocute him and knock him down)

Mr. Moogle and Pseudonym: Every move, each attack you use

(Blastoise rolls over and stands up)

-

J: It's a whole new place

(Arcanine and Pyroar start circling each other)

Sam and Reu: You think you can win but you'll always lose

(Mategross runs over and slams its entire body into Blastoise's, pushing him to the ground and whacking him with his legs over and over)

Gingerale and Nicholas: HOLD ON!

(Salamence spins around and knocks Luxray off him. Floating upside down, he charges a hyper beam in his mouth directed at Luxray)

Joe: With a brand new attitude

(Arcanine pounced for Pyroar, but Pyroar jumps up and makes Arcanine land on his face)

Gingerale and Nicholas: We're friends for life

(Shinxy's Luxray rolls and avoids the hyper beam, running over and tackling Grovyle)

Rydli: POKÉMON!

(Alice throws out Sylveon)

Pantz: It's you and me!

(Genesect shoots directly at Gogoat, knocking him out)

Element: And if we come

(The Luxray build up electricity around them and run towards Grovyle)

Berserker: But you still

(Berserker points his finger at Arcanine)

Alice: I know it's my destiny!

(Sylveon shoots dazzling gleam at Blaziken, who dodges all the shards)

Shinxy: Together as one

(The Luxray run side by side)

Jp: Gotta catch

(Arcanine looks at Pyroar behind him and tries to get up. He runs for Pyroar)

Nicholas: Complete the quest

(The Luxray shoot out bolts of electricity but Grovyle jumps over it, landing on Salamence, who flys him around the arena)

Robot: POKÉMON!

(Genesect's cannons follow Blaziken's every moment, shooting at him but missing each shot)

Pantz: Oh your my best friend

(Pantz watches Rydli take on Alice and Robot on his own)

Gingerale: that we've begun

(Salamence roars as he and Grovyle fly directly at the two Luxray, who both are emitting an overload of electricity)

J: 'em all

(Pyroar and Arcanine clash head to head, each growling and trying to push the other to the ground)

Pseudonym: Oh oh oh

(As Blastoise is pinned by Metagross, water charges in his two cannons)

Nicholas and Gingerale: And we will win the battle

(Grovyle jumps off Salamence and slices at the Luxray, cutting through their electricity bolts and swiping at their bodies)

Berserker and J: And be the best that you can be

(Pyroar lifts his head and knocks it off Arcanine's forehead, making him fall to the ground unconsciously)

Mr. Moogle and Pseudonym: Advanced battle, I'm unbeatable

(A large wave of water is shot out of Blastoise's cannons, knocking Metagross back and causing him to faint)

Alice: In the world we must defend

(Sylveon's bows raise as Blaziken prepares to attack)

J and Berserker: Do-do-do-do do-do-do-do-do

(J and Berserker celebrate excitedly)

Nicholas and Gingerale: POKÈMON!

(Salamence crashed into the two Luxray just as he released a hyper beam, a large puff of smoke comes our as Grovyle lands on his feet a few feet away, victorious)

Rydli: A heart so true

(Blaziken raises above the ground, twirling slowly as he closes in his legs and arms, building up fire power all throughout his body. He faces Genesect and Sylveon and pumps his legs and arms out, fire blazing out of his mustache. He rushed at his opponents at incredible speed)

J and Berserker: Do-do-do-do do-do-do-do-do

(J sticks his head in Tentacruel's ass as Berserker tends to his Pyroar)

Alice and Robot: Our courage will pull us through

(Genesect and Sylveon hug each other in cowardice)

Rydli and Pantz: You teach me and I'll teach you

(Mega Blaziken closes in on Genesect and Sylveon, rushing into them and letting out an explosion of fire, knocking them both out)

Pantz: Pokémon!

(Pantz jumps up and down excitedly)

Rydli: Gotta catch 'em all

(Rydli folds his arm and smirks)

Alice and Robot: Gotta catch 'em

(Alice and Robot sigh)

Rydli and Pantz: Gotta catch 'em all

(Rydli and Pantz go for a high five but then remember they don't trust each other and stop)

All: It's the same thing every year  
But we just do not care  
Friendship, together, fight as one  
Believe in yourself, until you've won

POKÉMON!

[le big finish]

"And Rydli and Panz ADVANCE to round 3. Haha, see what I did there? Advance? Yeah ok so yeah. Mr. Moogle and Pseduonym, J and Berserker, GingeraleDragon and Nicholas, and Rydli and Pantz. You 8 will be in the semifinals. Congrats on making it this far." Admin announced.

"A-ha! We're doing great! If we win this I'll get to take home Marrowsky~ Or I can choose Marrowsky's Lucario to bring home that'll probably make him happy 3" J said.  
"Or it could be one of my Pokémon, that is also an option." Berserker said.

"I can't believe we fucking lost, it's all your fault bitch" Sam said.  
"My Pokémon lasted longer than yours" Reu defended.  
"Hot shot stop making up excuses YOU LOST YOU SUCK. I feel like I'm the only non-homosexual here gah" Sam spouted.

"We're doing pretty good. J and Berserker or Gingerale and Nicholas, huh?" Pantz said.  
"We'll do fine against either one of them." Rydli said confidentially.

"We got this in the bag. Gingerale and Nichols suck and J will probably mess up for Berserker, so either way we're golden" Mr. Moogle said.  
"The less I have to work the better" Pseudonym said.

"Wow, so final 8 are all from the Skype group. Except Berserker never joins call and we're evicting J" Nicholas said.  
"Rydli and Pantz, or Moogle and Pseudo...well Rydli's good at everything so I hope we get the others" Gingerale said.

The icons started to scroll to decide the matchups.

"If we lose, who should we vote off?" Gingerale asked.  
"Stickboy, Stickboy, Stickboy" Nicholas said.  
"Maybe even J" Gingerale said.  
"Uh, guys, I don't think you hold that much power" Lemon said from nearby.  
"What's that supposed to mean, Lemon..." Nicholas asked.

Lemon made sure no one was looking before approaching the two and keeping a low voice.

"I mean, judging by the previous elimination ceremonies, you're almost always on the chopping block. At this rate, Gingerale will probably be voted off the next time we lose" Lemon said.  
"What? Shut up Lemon" Gingerale said.

The icons stopped and the screen displayed Gingerale, Nicholas, Rydli, and Pantz.

Gingerale thought about what Lemon said.

[Gingerale in le confession toilet]  
"My team doesn't hate me. I mean, that list wasn't serious...no.."  
[le end]

Nicholas and Gingerale stood on the left side of the ring, Rydli wheeled over to the right and sat next to Pantz.

They eyed each other down as the crowd cheered.

"Just get this over with I lost I don't want watch this anymore" Cloud sighed.

The four all tossed their Pokéballs, Gingerale releasing Ampharos for Nicholas, Greninja for Gingerale, Aeigislash for Rydli, and Barbarcle for Pantz.

"I'll go for the Barbarcle, you handle the Aeigislash" Gingerale suggested.

"Neither of these benefit Ampharos" Nicholas said.

"Ampharos is at a disadvantage here, so let's both go for Greninja first" Rydli said.  
"Fine" Pantz said.

Greninja ran up to his opponents, his tongue waving in the air. He charged up a water shuriken between his hand as he appealed Barbarcle. Barbarcle held both hands in front of him in an attempt to shield himself from the shuriken.  
Nicholas exposed his arm, slamming down on his mega ring.  
Amoharos grew long, majestic hair and a fluffy flowing tail. It tilted its head and waved her hair as she let out a cry.

"Yeah that's nice, won't help you though" Rydli said.

Aeigislash switched from defense to attack stance, levitating towards Mega Ampharos. It stuck its sword at Ampharos, burying it into his arm. Aeigislash tried to retract it be it was struck. Mega Amoharos took this opportunity to summon a bolt of electricity, electrocuting Aeigislash, but he didn't even flinch. Taking his sword out, he sliced at Mega Ampharos and knocked her down.

Barbarcle tried grabbing Greninja with its four arms but Greninja slapped each one away. Pulling his arms back and making them cross, Greninja summoned two short swords made of water and sliced at Barbarcle right up his body. The slice barely hurt Barbarcle, who lunged forward and grabbed Greninja's arms. Greninja shot out some water at Barbaracle's hands, making him lose his grip and allowing Greninja to slip away. Greninja fell on his back and heard Ampharos make a cry.

"Greninja, go for Aiegislash" Gingerale said.

Greninja picked himself up and ran towards Arigislash and Ampharos, Barbaracle trailing behind. Aeigislash made several jabs at Ampharos, but he rolled over and dodged each one. Greninja jumped on Aeigislash, forming water swords and swiping at his shield. Aeigislash switched to his defense stance as Mega Ampharos got up. Barbaracle made a swipe for Greninja, who dodged it by leaping up. Mega Ampharos tackled Barbaracle, knocking him to the ground. Mega Ampharos stood over him and summoned thunder, electrocuting him all over. He tried to get up but failed, fainting.  
The huge screen portraying the battlers showed one of the Pokéballs next to Pantz fade to black, indicating a KO.

Grenjnja kept himself latched onto Aeigislash, throwing out more swipes, but Aeigislash responded by pumping his shield out, knocking Greninja off him.

"GO GO GOGOAT" Pantz shouted, tossing her next Pokéball out.

Gogoat immediately ran across the stage. Mega Amoharos stood in front of Greninja to protect him but Gogoat rammed right into him, digging its horns into Ampharos' fur and picking him up, tossing him behind. Greninja got up just in time for Gogoat to ran into him, knocking him down again.

"Gogoat razor leaf" Pantz ordered.

A bunch of leaves floated around Gogoat.

"GOGOAT" Gogoat said, forcing its head forward. All of the leaves lunged for Greninja.

The leaves cut Greninja all over, making him lose balance and fall to the ground defeated. Mega Ampharos made a dash for Gogoat, but Aeigislash stood in front of her, switching to attack stance. A large, shadowy ball formed in front of Aeigislash, flying towards Ampharos and knocking him down. Ampharos tried getting up, but Aeigislash swiped at him with his sword one more time.

The screen showed Nicholas and Gingerale each go down one Pokéball.

They both threw out their next Pokéball releasing their second Pokémon, Goodra for Nicholas and Lucario for Gingerale.

"Oh a Lucario, how original" Stickboy said from the second floor.  
"Shut up Stickboy" Nicholas yelled.

Lucario and Goodra ran out. As Lucairo neared Aeigislash, he clenches his fists and prepared for a punch. He leaped up and pulled his arm back to strengthen his punch. Aeigislash held his shield in front of him for defense and Lucario threw his fist our, smashing into the shield and causing a large sound ringing sound so emit, Aeigislash was pushed back by the force. Everyone looked up and watched as Aeigislash's health didn't move at all.

"Looks like somebody forgot that fighting moves don't have any effect on ghost types" Rydli smirked.

Aeigislash switched to attack stance, pulling its shield back and readying its.

"Oh shit what should we do?" Gingerale asked.  
"Hold on let me get back from Bulbapedia. Alright it's weak to ghost dark ground and fire" Nicholas read.

"You guys are doing terrible" Stickboy said.

"OH MY GOD STICKBOY SHUT THE FRICK UP" Nicholas shouted.

Gogoat rammed into Goodra, who remained standing unfazed by the attack. Gogoat kept running even though Goodra wasn't moving. Goo dripped onto Gogoat's back as she kept running, shoving her head further into Goodra's waist and making her head submerge to the goo even more. Goodra picked Gogoat up with both hands, lifting it up, then turned it so her head was facing the ground. Gogoat let out a cry as Goodra slammed the Gogoat down. Gogoat got back up, wobbling around dizzily, but Goodra climbed aboard her. Gogoat shook her head and noticed Goodra on her, then started running around trying to throw the Goodra off. Goodra kept a nice grip, not letting herself fall.

Gingerale slammed down on his mega ring and Lucario's body grew stronger a she mega evolved into Mega Lucairo.

Shinxy's hand moves towards his penis but Element slapped it away.

Gogoat kept trying to run but Goodra was so fat he couldn't handle it, she started panting heavily and collapsed. Mega Lucario charged up a multiple number of punches for he Gogoat. Goodra jumped out of the way as Mega Lucairo kicked it upwards than leaped up and delivered a devastating punch, knocking it across the stage. Mega Lucario ran over to attack again but tripped and fell on the ground as he reverted to normal Lucario.

"What the heck" Pantz said.  
"I guess that Lucario plays by Smash principals for some reason" Rydli said.  
"That doesn't even make sense I mean it didn't for the other Pokémon not even Marrowsky's Lucario, it just feels like a forced gag" Rydli said.  
"Maybe the rushed joke was the joke itself and the humor comes from how badly plotted it was" Pantz said.  
"Ugh" Rydli groaned.

As Lucairo picked himself up, Aeigislash whacked him with his sword, knocking him back down. Goodra ran over to Aeigislash to attack but Aeigislash shielded it, Goodra pushed herself with might against Aeigislash, but he pushed back harder, slamming his shield into Goodra's head, knocking him onto Lucairo where they both fainted.

Gingerale took a nerf gun out of his pocket and shot several days at Aegislash desperately.

"NERF IT NERF IT AHHHH" he said as he pulled his hair.

The screen showed Gingerale, Nicholas, and Pantz's icons with one Pokéball next to them, whereas Rydli had all three Pokéballs next to his icon.

Gingerale, Nicholas, and Pantz all tossed out their last Pokémon, Charizarf, Grovyle, and Smeargle respectively.

"Charizard can take him out no problem...we can comeback from this..." Gingerale said to Nicholas.

"Aeigislash defense stance!" Rydli yelled out, and Aeigislash obediently held his shield in front of himself readily.

Grovyle rushed toward him, slicing at the shield with both claws. Aeigislash rammed into Grovyle knocking him down, whee Smasrgle jogged over and whacked Grovyle with his tail. Grovyle kicked Smeargle as he laid on the ground and then hopped to his feet. He built up energy in is arms as he tossed out rapid swipe to cut Smeargle, Charziard flew over both of them and roared as fire built up in his mouth. He flew towards Aeigislash and release a flamethrower, Aeigislash held his shield in front of himself desperately but the fire burnt right through it and damaged him enough to knock him out.  
Smeargle wave tail around, sketching the move he just witnessed. He turned to Grovyle and shot out a flamethrower. Grovyle dived to the ground to dodge it. Smeargle shout out more flamethrowers, chasing Grovyle around the arena.

Rydli sent out his second Pokémon, Articuno.

"Hah. This should be easy" Gingerale said confidently.

The Articuno flapped its tail majestically as it let out a soft cry, lifting itself from the ground and floating softly through the skies. Charizard shaded after it, flying with intense speed. Articuno twirled and let Charizard pass it. Articuno diver towards Grovyle, sending out its frosty breath, freezing Grovyle in place.

"Nicholas you need to evolve Grovyle. We're going to lose if you use a Pokémon that isn't at its full potential" Gingerale said.  
"No. Sceptile's head looks like an ass and his body is stupid I'm not evolving into that." Nicholas said.

"You should evolve your Pokémon" Stickboy yelled down.  
"HOLY SHIT STICKBOY JUST SHUT THE FRICK UP NOBODY ASKED" Nicholas yelled.

Smeargle sent our another flamethrower to the frozen Grovyle, sending its health to zero and knocking Nicholas out entirely.

Charizard flew towards Articuno, who slowly fapped its wings. Charizard sent out a burst of fire but Articuno dodged it, swiftly flying behind Charizard and tying its tail around Charizard's foot. Charizard turned around and Articuno flew upwards, knocking Charizard backwards and making him lose flight. The weight of Charizard brought Articuno down a bit, but it used its strength to continue flying. Charizard sent it a number of unfocused fire bursts, the crowd all ducked trying not to get hit. Articuno spit out an ice shard at Charizard and unraveled its tail, letting Charizard fall. Charizard crashed on the floor headfirst, slamming face down on to the ground.

"NOOOOO!" Gingerale screamed.

"It's not just about type advantages it's all about strategy. Maybe you should have thought about that instead of going with that dumb Charizard" Rydli snickered.

Gingerale kneeled down, looking at the battlefield to collect his thoughts.

"You think you're so great, huh Rydli?" Gingerale asked.

The entire room was silent.

"Come on Gingerale, it's not like we're enemies. Don't take it so hard, I-"

"No!" Gingerale said, standing up.

"I get it, you're good at everything. You're fluent in like seven different languages, you get all the girls, you're grades are amazing, you're a wiz at math, you're athletic, and you can charm your way through just about anybody. I get that you're better than me. I get that I'm a piece of shit, and that I'm a huge faggot, most of my team hates me, and odds are I won't survive a few more episodes."

The haikuers all watched, Isaac was eating popcorn.

"You're always flaunting your abilities at me. And you know what, I'm tired of it. I don't hate you like Haikik, this doesn't change our friendship, but I'm really pissed off right now. I came out here today and now I'm in the semifinals. I know what you guys say about me, saying I suck. But I don't care. These Pokémon mean something to me, and for once I'm going to knock you off your pedestal" Gingerale said, tightening his Charizard hat.

Charizard used all of his strength in his arms to slowly pick himself up, an act that made Rydli gasp.

"Oh yeah, well it isn't easy being good at everything! I have to work for my success! What's even worse is that you guys are constantly making fun of me over it! Do you know what it's like to have everyone shitpost what you do? Everyone is just waiting to see me fail, but I won't give them that satisfaction. I'm going to work even harder to prove myself and be somebody, and you can't stop me!" Rydli shouted as Charizard got up.

"Holy shit these guys are the biggest faggots I've ever seen" Cloud said.

Charizard struggled to keep himself standing. Articuno flapped its wings above, Smeargle tapped its foot and whirled his tail in his hand a few feet away. Charizard breasted slowly and narrowed his eyes.

"Charizard, kick their ass" Gingerale commanded.  
"Gingerale, I-" Nicholas said, but Gingerale hushed him.

Smeargle ran to Charizard, but Charizard stopped him with his foot. Articuno flew down, directly towards Charizard, preparing an ice attack, but Charizard stomped on Smeargle, forcing a flamethrower out of his mouth. The flamethrower hit Articuno and made it spin out of control. Charizard kicked Smeargle out of the way, where it rolled across the floor and diminishes his health to zero. Charizard flapped his wings and took to the sky. Articuno regained control, turning around to face Charizard. The two locked eyes and soared towards each other. Charizard shot of a flamethrower as Articuno shot out an icy breath. The two attacks collided for a second but Charizard's move easily overcame the ice and struck Articuno harshly, making it fall to the ground defeated. Charizard slowly descended, landing on his feet.

"So it comes to this..." Rydli said, readying his Pokéball.

He tossed it out and Blaziken emerged from the flash. Rydli immediately took out his pendant and pressed down on it, and Blaziken transformed into the even more powerful Mega Blaziken. Mega Blaziken stood on one foot as fire emitted throughout his body. Charizard snorted smoke out of his nose. The two locked eyes and stood silently for a few moments.

The camera focused on Nicholas, then turned to Pantz, then to Rydli, and finally Gingerale.

"Why's he so fixated with that Charizard anyway?" Rydli asked himself aloud.  
"Uh, you could have used the confessional for that" Pantz said.  
"Sorry, it's more dramatic and anime-like when you build up suspense like that" Rydli said.

Charizard and Mega Blaziken both let out a cry as they ran toward each other.

[le flashback]

A coquette flies down the street, passing by various stores and citizens. It slows down and comes to a stop as it comes to a red light. The married couple inside look back to check on the kids, and the two identical brothers are safely fastened to their seats, playing on their GameBoys with a link cable connecting them.

"Haha take that the young boy taunts"

"Ugh" the other sighs.

On their GameBoys they are engaged in a Pokémon battle. The twin on the left of the car is using a Charizard, the one on the right using a Dragonite. The twin on the left had a Charizard cap on his head, lamenting his fascination with the Pokémon.

"What level is your Charizard? My Dragonite always loses to him..." the right twin groans.

"They're the same level" the left laughs.  
"You just gotta put more effort in"

"Now boys, play nice." the father says as the light turns green, he presses his foot on the pedal and the car starts moving once more.

"They're not fighting, Gingerale Jr. is just giving his bigger brother Gingerale some advice, Hun" the mother said.

"Oh, so you're engaged in what they're talking about?" the father chuckles.

"Stop it" the mother grind, playfully tapping his shoulder with a wrapped up newspaper.

Gingerale watched as his Deagonite's HP fell to 0 and fainted.

"I hate Charizard, he's so overpowered!" Gingerale snapped.

"Haha! Just use Blastoise, you silly goose" Gingerale Jr advised, giving his brother a playful punch.

Gingerale Jr. placed his finger in his GameBoy screen, feeling Charizard's body.

"My first Pokémon, I'll cherish you always!" Gingerale Jr smiled.

"Do you think mom and dad are getting a divorce?" Jr asked.

"What. Where the heck did that come from. Of course not, now let's never bring this up again" Gingerale said.

The parents giggled and shared a kiss as they were stopped at another red light. Unbeknownst to them, at the top of the hill ahead of them, a man steps out of his truck to fill it with gas. As he leaves, he unknowingly left the gear stick in drive. The truck starts to slowly move forward before gaining speed as the wheels flow down the hill. The logs in the back of the truck rumble a bit.

"There's rumors of a new Pokémon game with a land shark Pokémon, I bet it'll be cool!" Gingerale Jr. said excitedly, fixing his glasses.

"What? No way. But hey, maybe it beat your dumb Charizard. You may be a nerd at video games but I still own you in real life" Gingerale taunted, pulling his twin to him and pulling his Charizard cap off, giving his head a noogie.

"Haha! Aha! Uncle! Uncle!" Gingerale Jr. laughed with pain, struggling to pull himself away.

"I love this family" the mother said, taking her husband's hand and locking into his eyes.

The truck collided with the car, and everybody's bodies were thrown up, but their seatbelts kept them from moving much. The windows all shattered as a log flew off the truck. The log flew through the windshield and tore through the link cable connecting the GameBoys, crushing Gingerale Jr's head, Gingerale lost ahold and fell to the corner of the backseat. The car alarm boomed as the car stopped bouncing, flipping over and then back right side up. The parents slowly rose their heads and felt their heads to feel the blood. They quickly looked back to check on the kids, Gingerale laying on the floor and Gingerale Jr's face crushed by the log, his entire body pressed against the seat by it. Gingerale coughed up blood as he picked his glasses up and put the broken lenses against his face. His mother screamed and his father held her to console her.

"G-Gingerale..." the small boy's voice muttered quietly.

Gingerale climbed on his seat and crawled next to his brother, looking at him with a horrified expression. He felt his brother's cold face with the back of his hand.

"Gingerale...tell me...do you think...I'll ever catch that rare Charizard I've always wanted...they say his color is black...I bet...it's so cool..." Jr coughed.

Gingerale avoided eye contact with a look of disdain. His eyes were focused below him, where the Charizard cap lay.

[back to le present]

"CHARIZARD, BLAST BURN" Gingerale commanded, pulling his Charizard cap down.

Fire erupted around Charizard as he and Mega Blaziken clashed, they grabbed rand others hands and both pushed at each other with great force. Fire flowed through them both.

"BLAZE KICK" Rydli shouted.

Fire surrounded Mega Blaziken's leg as he raised it up, pressing it with all his might against Charizard's stomach to push him away. Charizard let go of Blaziken's hands and out both in his foot as it was pressed against his stomach. The power forced Charizard back a bit. Charizard pushed his feet roughly against the ground to limit the distance he was bring pushed back. Sweat poured down Charizard's face as he Ritter his teeth. The foot pressed against his stomach burned throughout his entire body, emitting a sharp pain. Charizard concentrated the pain into power and shot out a large burst of fire, and Mega Blaziken did the same. The fires collided. Charizard started rotating slowly. The fires continued to clash against each other. Charizard rotated faster and faster, picking up speed. Blaziken was lifted off the ground as Charizard was whirling him around. Charizard started turning and turning repeatedly until all the audience could see was an orange blur. The Mega Blaziken started twirling himself with his foot still pressed against Charizard, Charizard was spun off the ground and lost hold of Blazilen. Blaziken flew across the room as Charizard spun around in the opposite direction. As Blaziken was nearing a wall at increasing speed, he shot out a beam of fire, the force of which made him shoot backwards. Charizard starting flapping his wings to regain balance. He watched as Blazilen flew towards him with a trail of fire behind. Charizard flew at him. Blaziken turned around and he and Charizard rushed at each other midair. Mega Blazilen readied his fiery fist as fire blazed out of Charizard's mouth. The two met and Blaziken delivered a powerful punch as Charizard delivered a powerful bite. A huge explosion of fire amounted, hiding the two Pokémon. Everyone shielded their eyes with their arms as the fire began to subside. Charziard and Mega Blaziken were on the ground, heads pressed against each orher. They both panted intensely. Gingerale, Nicholas, Rydli, and Pantz watched in anticipation. All of the haikuers were against the railing. The audience gasped. Charizard and Mega Blaziken's eyes grew weary. Mega Blaziken fell over and collapsed on the ground. Charizard put one foot on Mega Blaziken and roared, shooting out a blast of fire as he stood victorious, before falling down himself. The crowd all cheered and confetti rained down over the Pokémon. All of the haikuers were shocked.

"YEAH!" Gingerale said.  
"We're going to the finals...epic..." Nicholas said.

Rydli fell to his knees as he tried to process his loss.

"Whoa. That was so cool people on YouTube are going to be making anime music videos about it" Eden said.

Pantz held her hand out to Rydli. He looked up and grabbed it, and she pulled him up.

"You fought hard. Good job, man" she said.  
"Thanks, Pantz." He said.  
"You did good too"

"Will the examining four haikuers please step up" Admin requested.

Gingerale, Nicholas, Pantz, and Rydli went back to to the second floor as Berserker, J, Mr. Moogle, and Pseduonym stepped down.

On the giant screen their icons clashed and three Pokéball symbols rolled under each one.

"Berserker and J, if you win this battle Team Jacob will automatically win the challenge" Imboo said, and they nodded.

"Mr. Moogle and Pseduonym, you are he only pair left for your team. If you want to win the challenge, you'll need need to defeat Berserker and J, AND Gingerale and Nicholas" Imboo said, and they nodded.

"Ready, and begin!" Imboo said.

The four all whirled heir Pokéballs ahead. Berserker called out Mienshao. J called out Feraligatr. Mr. Moogle called out Hypno. Pseudonym called out Heracross.

"Feraligatr, ice fang on Haracross go!" J shouted.

Feraligatr ran over towards the opponents, chomping away. As Feraligatr caught up to Heracross, he made several icy chimps, but Heracross flew out of the way with each unsuccessful bite. Heracross' horn glowed brightly as he stuck it in Feraligatr's mouth. Feraligatr chomped down and Heracross screamed. Feraligatr threw his head up and down, making Heracross fly up and down to the ground painfully.

Mienshao ran through the arena, her two hand whip things placed under her face.

"Hi Jump Kick!" Berserker commanded.

Mienshao leaped up, putting her foot forward. Hypo guarded himself but Mienshao came upon Hypno, kicking Hypno harshly and pushing him back some. His health only went down a little. Mienshao stood in front of him.

"Looks like they're getting shrekt" Cloud said as he watched Heracross repeatedly be slammed on the floor.  
"I wouldn't underestimate their power" Rydli said, focused on the battle.

[le flashback]

Rydli and Pseudonym are sitting across from each other with a Connect 4 set up in front of them. Rydli's finger sits atop his mouth as he awaits Pseudo's next move. Pseudo watches the grid with a bored expression, he looks at Rydli as he places his black checker in the very right slot. It falls down making a three-high combination.

"Hmf. It appears you have fallen into my trap!" Rydli says, placing the red checker into the same slot. The checker breaks Pseudo's combo and adds a combination of three vertical checkers, with the gap right next to it remaining. Rydli lets out a modest snicker.

Pseudonym quietly raises a black checker, placing it into the slot to the left of the very right. It falls. As Pseudo traces the diagonal connection of the four checkers with his finger, Rydli gasps.

[back to le present]

"In all the five games of Connect Four me and him have played, I have won once. He's got to be one of the most critical thinkers I've ever seen..." Rydli said.

Cloud crossed his arms because that's one of the two motions anybody in this story ever does.

Feraligatr continued to slam Heracross down, finishing him off by finding him away, where he tumbled in the ground with a frozen horn.

"Now" Pseudonym said.  
"Hypno, hypnosis!" Moogle commanded.

Hypno tapped his pendulum and a beam shot out, flowing over Feralgatr's body and causing him to drift off to sleep. He fell flat on the floor.

"He left himself open, use Hi Jump Kick" J said.  
"No." Berserker replied.  
"Why naaaaaaawt?" J asked.  
"It has a decent chance of failing and it's not even that effective against either Pokémon" Berserker explained.

"Well guess what, looks like you don't have much of a choice" Pseudonym said.  
"I hit your Mienshao with an Encore, so t must repeat the same attack"

"Gasp!" J gasped.  
"Don't narrate your emotions" Berserker said.

Mienshao leaped up towards Hypno, foot directed for his face.

"Hypno, duck it!" Moogle said.

Hypno obeyed and threw his back back, Mienshao flew over his body as he pulled himself down. Mienshao crashed behind him and suffered some damage.

"You fell right for our trap. Heracross can't even learn Encore" Moogle said.  
"Oh..." J said.

Feraligatr continued to snooze on the floor, Heracross lifted himself up and stood confidently.

"Mienshao, head for Heracross" Berserker ordered.  
"Feraligatr, keep sleeping" J ordered.

Mienshao got to her feet and ran in front of Heracross, throwing her hand things out, but Heracross dodged each one.

"Hypno, hypnosis!" Moogle pointed.

"Hypno!" Hypno said, ticking his pendulum.

The wave shot towards Mienshao, but she sidestepped to her left, making it miss. Heracross fell to the ground as he dozed off.

"Nice!" J said.  
"Mienshao, drain punch!" Berserker shouted.

Mienshao built up power in her fist. She readied herself for a leap and pulled her fist back, she jumped forward but came immediately crashing down. Heracross grabbed onto her legs to make her trip, and she landed directly on Feraligatr, punching him by a mistake.

"What the!" J said.

Energy flowed from Feraligatr to Mienshao, bubbles of life force colored yellow and purple.

"Purple?" Berserker asked.

Feraligatr yawned as he woke up, getting up.

"Yep. Feraligatr was poisoned. I made sure the point of Heracross' horn had some poison on it, knowing that part of his body would stick out most to Feraligatr. When he chomped down he was poisoned. You tried to outsmart us by making Hypno strike Heracross with a hypnosis, but Heracross cast a protect and faked his sleep. Mienshao avoided the hypnosis but leaped right in front of Feraligatr. From there we could mess up Mienshao's attack and make her attack Feraligatr, poisoning herself in the process" Pseudonym explained.

"Alright dude explaining it to us doesn't make it sound any smarter" Berserker said.

Feraligatr glanced over at Heracross and started moving towards him, but a sharp pain struck his body and he lost the willpower to move forward, collapsing on Mienshao. Mienshao flailed under Feraligatr before giving up, admitting defeat. The two closed their eyes as a sign of defeat.

"Feraligatr and Mienshao are unable to battle. Send out your next Pokémon" Imboo said to Moogle and Pseudonym.

Heracross and Hypno exchanged a respectful nod.

J tossed out Typhlosion, Berserker Torterra.

"Aha! Marrowsky flamethrower on the Heracross!" J said.

Typhlosion dashed outwards, Torterra tossed out a group of seeds above him. As Typhlosion tackled Heracross, the Bug Pokémon responded bye slapping him with his horn and flying up. From the ground, Typhlosion let out a blast of fire that struck Heracross and made him fall off balance, falling to the ground and fainting.  
Torterra's seeds were planted at Hypno's feet, sucking in health from him and giving them to Torterra.  
Hypno attempted to use hypnosis on Typhlosion, but missed. Yeah. Sometimes things can just miss.  
Typhlosion tackled Hypno, gnawing on his neck as his health continued to be sapped. He cried before losing consciousness.

"Wow, that was a little rough but good job! Aha!" J said.

"Flareon, go" Pseudonym said, tossing his Pokéball out.  
"You too, Magikarp!" Moogle said, tossing his Pokéball out.

Magikarp and Flareon both popped out. Flareon's fur rustled as Magikarp flopped around stupidly.

"Alright Magikarp hit him with a splash attack" Moogle said.

Magikarp flopped around uselessly.

"Flareon, Fire Spin!" Pseudonym called out.  
"Flareon!" Flareon said, dashing out, several tornados of fire formed around Torterra, making his health do down a bit.

"Wait, I thought fire was super effective against grass. Torterra should have been REKT" Joe said.

Rydli pushed his glasses up.

"Actually, Torterra is half ground, which is resistant to fire type Pokémon." Rydli explained.

Berserker and J looked at each other and nodded.

"Torterra, earthquake" Berserker commanded.

"You gonna take that, Magikarp? Go on, counter it with a splash attack" Moogle commanded.

Typhlosion jumped aboard Torterra's back to protect himself from the earthquake. The whole floor shook vigorously as Torterra stomped. Flareon and Magikarp were thrown off stage.

"Flareon and Magikarp are unable to battle" Imboo announced.  
"How would he know? His eyes are taped shut" Moogle said.  
"They cry their names when they die I can tell" Imboo explained.  
"That's not very helpful considering all they say is their name" Moogle said.  
"Just shut up and send out your last Pokémon" Imboo said.

Moogle and Pseudonym both whirled their Pokéballs onto stage, releasing a Dragonite and Swampert. Sjru waves to everyone.

"Hey guys! ^-^" Sjru greeted.

"Hi Sjru~" Shinxy said quietly from the audience.  
"Hey Sjoew" Gingerale greeted.  
"Ehhhhhhh its Sjru" Shinxy corrected.  
"Hi Sjew" Element said.  
"ehehhhh heeee ehh eh hehgege r its Sjru" Shinxy corrected.  
"Ok well to be fair he shouldn't have chosen a retarded name" Nicholas defended.

"I'm out of the loop!? Who is Sjru?" Joe asked.  
"One of Shinxy's friends whose fursona is a Pokémon or something" Element explained.  
"friend of Shinxy  
Alright I'm outta here" Alice said, walking away.  
"Alright first of all don't greentext unless you're Moogle of Marrowsky. Thirdly, Element you think you can just summarize somebody's entire existence with that? Shew could be a wonderful person with a great personality and a lot of interests but all you can say about him is "he's a friend of Shinxy"" Nicholas said.  
"I DON'T KNOW HIM OK I DON'T TALK TO HIM HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO KNOW WHAT HE'S LIKE" Element defended.  
"erection" Carz added.  
"I'm pretty sure that was just a normal Dragonite earlier today" Eden said.

"Actually as you can see, he has blue hair and is wearing headphones now, so he's officially Shoe" Moogle explained to everyone.  
"Yeah like how Shinxy's an original Shinx because he wears 3D glasses" Pseudonym said.

"Hold on, so I can just ass some random accessory to any Pokémon and it will be my own character?" J asked.

"Pretty much" Moogle said.

"You look like a nice fellow, hugz? :3" Sjru hugger Typhlosion.

"Oh no bitch don't touch my Typhlosion, get back Marrowsky, go MUNA" J ordered, sucking Thphlosion back into his ball and sending out a Meganium.  
"Good idea, Swampert will easily succumb to Meganium" Berserker said.  
"Oh. Yeah sure" J said.

"Teehee~" Sjru blushed, hugging Meganium.

Pseudonym slowly evaluated the battlefield and tried to think of a way out of his predicament, glancing over at each Pokémon and watching its movement.

"This is how I'd act if I didn't have biased writing disease" Lukeguy said.

"Be wary and don't keep your guard down, they're trying to make us believe we have an upper hand so they can make an unexpected counter" Berserker replied.  
"Huh? Look, a butterfly!" J smiled as a butterfly flew by.

"Swampert, ice beam" Pseudo called out.

A think beam of ice shot or of Swampert's mouth.

"Oo, watch it. I'm a dragon so I'm weak to that heh ^-^" Sjru said, lifting his tail up to avoid the ice.

The ice struck Torterra, knocking him down immediately. Torterra's health flashed to zero.

"Oh shit!" J said.  
"If his Swampert knows an ice move, you should try to get rid of it as fast as possible. You do have the 4X advantage" Berserker said.  
"Muna, leaf tornado!" J shouted.

Meganium let out a cry as it whirled its head, summoning a whirlwind to contour up. A bunch of leaves caught in the whirlwind flew in circles rapidly as it approached Swampert. The tornado struck Swampert and he grunted as he fell down. He collapsed a bit but held himself up with one arm.

"Can you mega evolve Swampert?" Moogle asked.  
"Nah. Didn't get the stone" Pseudonym said.  
"Crud..." Moogle responded.  
"Dragonite, FIRE PUNCH!" Moogle shouted.

"Don't yell at meeee, :c. And I don't want to punch, can I give her a hug? x3" Sjru asked, walking over to Meganium and giving her a fluffy hug.

Moogle sighed.

"Alright, it's up to you Avalugg" Berserker said, tossing his final Pokéball to the stage.

J turned his hat around.

"A bunch of ice followed Avalugg as he walked slowly across the ground.

"Avalanche" Berserker said.

"Heh, sounds kewl~" Sjru said as a bunch of rocks fell on him and crushed him. Sjru struggled to get out of the rocks surrounding him. Swampert jumped out of the way and dodged all of he incoming rocks.

"Swampert, surf" Pseudonym ordered.

Swampert growled as he lifted up, a wave of water slammed across the field, immediately freezing upon nearing Avalugg.

"What, why didn't he use ice beam and finish you off?" Berserker questioned.  
"Muna, leaf tornado" J ordered.

Another gust of wind appeared and carried a trail of leaves toward Swampert.

"SWAMPERT HYDRO PUMP" Pseudonym said.

As a last resort, Seampert shot out a burst of water as the leaves overcame him knocking him backwards and causing him to faint.

"Avalugg ice beam!" Berserker said in recoil.

The ice shot right into the bits of water, freezing it into an icicle. The icicle dropped and crashed on Meganium's head, causing her to collapse on the ground, unable to battle.

"Great. Leaving it up to you now Moogle" Pseudonym said, putting a hand on his shoulder.

"You can do it Tyler!" Kirby screamed out.

Dragonite shoved all of the rocks off of him, raising above them and growling.

"Fire punch!" Moogle said.  
"Avalanche" Berserker said.  
"Marrowsky?" J asked.

Dragonite flew out at high speed, dodging all of the boulders and hail raining down around him, he rushed to Avalugg and smecked him with a great punch filled with fire. His head stated melting and he fell down defeated. The ice and cool air behind him started making the water freeze up.

"It's up to you J. Don't mess this up..." Berserker said.  
"I'll be fine!" J reassured.

"Wow Sjru started taking this seriously" Moogle noted.

Dragonite picked his headphones up and out them back on.

"Heeey what's up guys? x3" Sjru asked.

A Typhlosion wearing sunglasses stood cooly in front of J.

"Why is he wearing sunglasses..." Berserker asked with dots.  
"I wanted to make him more fashionable now he's more original, Marrowksy _" J said.

"Hey...hugz :3?" Sjru asked, giving Typhlosion a hug and snuggling up against him.

Typhlosion pushed Sjru off of him, he crashed on the ice and Typhlosion shot a great burst of fire at him. The ice crashed and Sjru fell through.

"Did we win?" J asked.

All of the ice started melting from Typhlosion's heat and turned into a great stream of water covering the whole arena. Typhlosion trembled near the edge of the stage, trying not to get him wet.

"And so the winners are-"

"Not so fast. I still have one Pokémon left." Moogle interrupted.

Anime screen covering with surprised faces thing.

"Who?" Admin asked.

Moogle tossed his Pokéball into the water, releasing Magikarp.

"Technically Imboo couldn't see well enough to determine if he fainted or not. And I mean, he always looks dead, so he wouldn't have been able to tell the difference" Moogle said.

"Magikarp?" Berserker asked.  
"Oh shit! Marrowsky use, uh, self destruct?" J commanded.

Typhlosion flopped on the ground, drowning in the 2 feet deep water.

"Magikarp. HYPER BEAM. Just kidding, just use splash attack" Moogle ordered.

"KAP LAPR LAKALALALAL" Magikarp cried, falling effortlessly in the water.

A huge crushing wave of water flew across the ground, completely overcoming Typhlosion, J, and Berserker and carrying them off stage. As the water subdued, the three were left on the ground drenched in water. Typhlosion's balls were in Berserker's face.

"Bitch!" J slapped him.

"That's what happens when you water the field Freeze It Up and then melt it as just the right time, welcome the blog of science, vidya, and diet soda BITCH" Moogle shouted excitedly, slapping Pseudonym's hand as their icons were plastered on the jumbo screen. Confetti rained upon them as the crowd chanted in an excited uproar.

"The final round, GingeraleDragon and Nicholas Vs. Mr. Moogle and Pseudonym, will commence in 10 minutes. Get ready everyone!" Admin announced.

Mr. Moogle and Pseudonym walked up to the stands to converse with their teammates.

"Kind of conflicted about this. I don't want Gingerale and Nicholas to win because they beat me and I hate them for that. But if they do win, that'll mean we only lost to the best so we don't suck" Cloud said.  
"Ok" Reu replied.

Cloud pushed Reu over the railing.

"Do you guys want to hear about a video game idea I have?" Cloud asked.  
"Uh, not really. We're kind of in the middle of, y'know, preparing for the final battle" Moogle said.  
"So in the game Mario and Luigi are slaves of Bowser and he marries Princess Peach, and the entire Mushroom Kingdom is ruled by him. He turns the world upside down! Everything is terrible! However, one hero can save the day...time for adventure, Toad is on the case. So Toad sets out on an epic quest to fight Bowser and save Mario and Luigi in an RPG like game and he teams up with some other cool characters along the way, like shy guy, a rejected koopa kid, and Paulina. It's a game about how the littlest people can change the world in a big way" Cloud explained.  
"That is literally the dumbest thing I have ever heard." Element replied.  
"Fuck you Element it was supposed to be dumb" Cloud said.  
"It sounded like you were serious" Element said.  
"Uh, hello. It's called doing something so stupid it's funny. It was a joke post." Cloud said.  
"So now you're just trying to act like you meant for it to be a joke?" Element asked.  
"What is happening right now, Element you're supposed to be the butt off the team, go fuck Shinxy or something" Cloud said.

"Alright everyone, will the remaining two pairs meet in the arena" Admin requested.

The final four competitors all walked down the stairs and stood on their side of the arena.

"You're going doooooooooooooooown" Gingerale taunted.  
"Yes, first them. Then r/vaporwave" Nicholas said.

"They're going to get destroyed" Moogle said.  
"Let's just get this over with" Pseudonym said.

The audience cheered as the jumbo screen displayed the for icons with three Pokéballs rolling under each. The four haikuers all whirled their first Pokéball out simultaneously, where they all popped out. Gingerale sent out Garchomp, Nicholas sent out Goodra, Mr. Moogle sent out Goodra, and Pseudonym sent out Shuckle.

"Two Goodras? Neat" Jp said.  
"Two Goodra." Rydli corrected.  
"I climbed up a Goodra's asshole once" StarForce chimed delightfully.

"Ice Beam!" Moogle yelled.  
"Ice Beam that fricker back" Nicholas yelled.

The Goodra both lunged forward and released an icy beam shooting toward each other. They both connected and made a straight thin line of ice between them. They both put equal power into trying to force the orher's beam back. A spark gleamed in the middle of the beam signifying the equal power. The gleam started moving towards Goodra, but then went back and started moving towards Goodra. The power beams eventually exploded into powdery dust, striking both Goodra. They both took some damage and started rushing towards each other.

Garchomp dug his claws into the ground as he lunged forward and aimed them at Shuckle. Shuckle had a petrified expression as he buried himself into his shell. Garchomp landed on the ground roughly, making Shuckle's shell bounce up. Garchomp chipped away at the shell, repeatedly swiping at it with each claw back and forth. Inside his shell, Shuckle remained unharmed.

"Hhhhhhhey Goodra, thunderbolt on that eeeeeeeeeeeeh that eeeeeeh that Goodra eh?" Moogle commanded.

Goodra screamed.

"Ok dude no need to get affective" Nicholas said.

Goodra summoned an array of bolts down from above, directed towards Goodra. Goodra dodged it and tackled Goodra, knocking them both to the ground. Goodra head-butted Goodra. Goodra pushed Goodra off of Goodra and the two came at each other.

"Heh" J said.  
"Really J" Berserker replied.

Goodra and Goodra locked hands and grunted as they both tried to overthrow the other. They sternly stood pressed against each other.

Garchomp out Shuckle's entire body in his mouth, trying to break the shell with his teeth, but to no avail. He threw he shell onto the ground where he started kicking it against a wall. The shell kept coming back and he continued returning kicks.

"Alright you went like 50 times let Shuckle have a turn" Pseudonym said.  
"Alright Shuckle, hit them with a sticky web" Pseudonym ordered.  
"I like how you rephrased your way of telling him to attack to spice up the diversity in or dialogue" Mr. Moogle complimented.  
"Thanks" Pseudonym replied.

Shuckle shot out a bunch of web towards the opposing team.

"What? That move doesn't do any damage, it must suck!" Joe said.

Rydli pushed his glasses up.

"Actually, sticky web reduced the opposing team's speed by one stage each time a new Pokémon switches in. A viable move, no?" Rydli said.  
"If it ain't Melee it ain't viable" Cloud said.

As the Goodra continued to try and knock the other down, Moogle eyed Garchomp.

"Alright Goodra, pop an Ice Beam on that Garchomp ass" Moogle ordered.

Goodra let go of Goodra for a moment, shooting out an icy beam at Garchomp. As he took a moment to do that, Goodra toppled him on the ground and started punching him while he was defenseless.  
Garchomp immediately fell to his knees before trembling down. Everyone watched as Garchomp's health immediately fell to 0. Garchomp laid in the ground and closed his eyes.

"GARHOMP! No!" Gingerale shouted.

The Pokéball icon faded leaving only 12 left on the screen.

"Shuckle, Stealth Rock" Pseudonym said.

Shuckle whirled a bunch of rocks toward the other team, planted around the starting point to damage incoming Pokémon.

Gingerale stood up.

"It's time." he said.  
"The return..." Nicholas said next to him.

GingeraleDragon tossed his second Pokéball out, where it landed among the rocks and his next Pokémon plopped out: Lapras the Lapras let out a majestic neigh as it turned its head.

"Omg he brought the Lapras!" Alice gasped excitedly.  
"Yeah, so" Riley asked.  
"Dude. It's THE Lapras. He's the Lapras Fucker. It's his thing!" Alice said.  
"Oh. Yeah I'm still kind of Haiku illiterate. Does he really want to fuck that Lapras?" Riley asked.  
"Of course. As much as Element wants to fuck a Shinx" Alice said.  
"Once more, I actually don't fap to Shinx. It's just a joke because I'm aware of the jokes my friends make fun of me and I'm cool with it" Element explained.  
"Yeah fuck off SHINX_FUCKER" Alice said, shooing him off.  
"Fine...just you wait, SHINX_FUCKER will be somebody someday..." Element grumbled, walking off. As Element walked away a flyer flew into him. He picked it off his shirt and read it.

"r/pokemon mod singups!" the flyer read.  
"Hmmm..." Element said as he stroked his neckbeard.

"Man some people have some weird obsessions" Riley said as he put his Sonic hoodie over his head.

The rocks dug into Lapras' bottom. She slowly moved forward as Shuckle shot out more and more rocks.

The Goodra rolled around the stage, leaving a large pile of goo behind as they continued to tussle. They got up and started growing punches at each other. One shot out fire as the other shot summoned thunder, whirl also shooting ice beams at each other.

Lapras continued to slowly make its way to the other Pokémon.

"Wow Lapras fucking sucks outside of water. Lapras use surf" Gingerale said.

Lapras was raised by a pillar of water from below, throwing her towards Shuckle and the Goodra and letting the wave crash over them all. Shuckle ducked inside his shell, letting the wave carry him. Goodra held Goodra below the water drying to drown him, but Goodra kicked the Goodra back and did the same to him. Lapras swam closer, splashing in the water as it lowered. Goodra leaped on Lapras as she flew over them. The two knocked Goodra down as they passed, Goodra jumping off Lapras to tackle Goodra and knock him out. The Pokéball next to Nicholas' icon faded.

"What the frick your Goodra was the one that fainted" Nicholas said.

"Actually, no. It was yours. Didn't keep your eye peeled that much during the skirmish, huh?" Moogle chuckled.  
"It was the plan all along. By watching your earlier battles we assumed you would call out Goodra first. From there we could mix the two up in the middle of a fight and make Gingerale accidentally attack Nicholas" Pseudonym said.

"$5 he didn't plan for that and he's just saying it now to look smart" Gingerale said.

Lapras glared at the remaining Goodra and knocked him down. Shuckle started spinning his shell rapidly, splashing water all around the place. Goodra growled at the Lapras.

"Hmm, I doubt Nicholas would evolve his Grovyle, so if he's planning on using a mega evolution he's most likely going to use Ampharos." Rydli thought.  
"Not so fast, Rydli. There's still one Pokémon I haven't seen from Nicholas yet that he told me he wanted to catch..." Element said as everyone watched over the railing.

"Leigh's. Mew" Nicholas said.

"Mew" Mew said cutefully as it appeared or of its Pokéball, Nicholas was almost smaller than it. It levitated off the ground and curling up. He didn't touch the rocks on the ground and wasn't harmed by them.

"Ok Element try not to fuck the Mew, Nicholas needs it for battle" Gingerale yelled up to him.

"ANTHRO MEW. I FUCK ANTHRO MEW" Element shouted down.

Goodra used Ice Beam but Mew shot out a reflect, the beam reflected off the pink screen that appeared and went back towards Shuckle and Goodra. The ice shot inside Shuckle's shell, freezing him in place. The shell stopped spinning and fell to the ground motionless. Lapras stuck its fins inside the shell and pulled in two opposite directions, snapping the shell in half and making Shickle's squirmy body fall down.

"Let's...count that as a KO" Admin said.

A Pokéball under Pseudo's icon faded, leaving two for him and 9 in the battle.

Goodra jumped at Mew, who giggled and telepathically grabbed ahold of him midair. He let him stay in midair as Lapras shot or a burst of water at him, knocking him down where he crashed on the ground and goo seeped out of his body. He struggled to get up.

"Man I could really use one of those Pokémon that can take five thousand hits and still stand up because their partner believes in them" Mr. Moogle said.

"That Mew is really strong..." Pantz admired from the stands.

Mew giggled and waved at the audience as they cheered for it. He put one leg over the other and put his hands behind his head as he floated around relaxed.

"Yeah, he took down two Pokémon that were in the battle the entire time and have been worn down by the previous Pokémon in the match. What a powerhouse." Pseudonym said.  
"Swampert, let's swamp these guys" Pseudo said, throwing his next Pokémon out.  
"Terrible line" Moogle said.  
"Yeah that was the joke" Pseudo said.

"Swampert? Against Lapras? He must not have good Pokémon left, I'd expect him to save Seampert for last. And Moogle, what could he be sending out next..." Gingerale wondered.  
"I don't know let's wait two seconds to find out" Nicholas replied.

"Alright Nicholas, I see that Mew. But I have something up my sleeve. I'm coming for that Mew..." Moogle whispered under his breath, throwing the ball out.

[Lemon in le confession toilet]  
"I have nothing to say I just wanted to use the toilet"  
[le end]

Out from the ball the white, feline-like Pokémon emerged. It held its head down before raising his head and looking over at his opponents. He stood tall as his purple tail flicked behind him, and Mewtwo made a dramatic pose.

Everyone gasped.

"Oh quit your gasping he's still as shit as he was in Melee" Cloud said.  
"Hey Element. Would you say Mewtwo is technically an anthro version of Mew?" Ziggy asked.  
"No" Element said.  
"So I guess that would make you a Mew2fucker as well?" Ziggy asked.  
"Shut up Ziggy" Element growled.  
"What a fagger growling like a furry" Ziggy said.

The new floated near the Mewtwo. Swampert and Lapras watched as the two locked eyes. Mew looked at the Mewtwo innocent while the Mewtwo watched it with angry eyes. Mewtwo snarled as his eyes glowed purple, he threw a shadow ball at Mew, who flew out of the way, the shadow ball flew into the wall and cracked it. Mew shit out a dinky little psychic beam that did shit.

"But, did you forget? Mewtwo can use psychic moves as well, like psychic" Mr. Moogle said.

Mewtwo stuck his hand out and shot out several balls of psychic energy. Mew closes its eyes and formed a pink bubble surrounding him, deflecting all shots off of it.

"Mew" Mew giggled,

"Alright Lapras, let's use-"

Before Gingerale could finish his sentence, Mewtwo lifted Lapras up with telepathy, slamming the Lapras off the wall several times until it fell and fainted.

"What the fuck" Gingerale complained.

As the screen displayed Lapras' health diminish to 0, Gingerale was left with his last Pokémon while everyone else still had 2.

Moogle dug into his turtleneck shirt and pulled out a necklace, holding a mega pendant on it. It shined in the light.

"What the FUCK!" Marrowsky said.

Moogle pressed down on it and Mewtwo closed its eyes. Some extra marks formed along its arm and legs, purple vest like pads were added near its shoulder, and it grew two extra toes, transforming into Mega Mewtwo X and roaring.

"Mega Mewtwo X? Nobody uses that one" Nicholas said.

"I'm special" Moogle said.

Mega Mewtwo X out its hands out and started forming a large sphere. It glowed brightly as it grew larger, before releasing the pink ball of energy. Mew tried to form another bubble but the ball penetrated it immediately, passing through it and smashing into Mew. Mew flipped around around times as he was shot backwards, before collecting himself and shaking his head while he was floating near the rooftop. Mew swiftly flew towards the Mewtwo as Element examined its ass, sending out a psychic ray that struck Mewtwo and knocked him back a few feet. Mewtwo growled and his eyes glowed purple once more. A large aura of energy erupted around him as he levitated upwards, flying straight for Mew. Mew held his feet out and kicked the Mewtwo back, onto for Mewtwo to release a large blast, striking Mew and carrying him across the room to the wall, where he slammed against it and left a huge hole, slowly falling down the wall to the floor.

"Alright. My last Pokémon. You can do this..." Gingerale said, sending out his fat lizard, Charizard.

Charizard made a muscle with his arm and flapped his wings confidently, then looked over to see his opponent was Seampert and walked back to Gingerale with an agitated look. Swampert ran out on all fours, forming bubbles on his mouth. He leaped on Charizard's back, and Charizard started falling a bit as Swampert pulled on his neck. Swampert spit out a blast of water at Charizard's head, making Charizard shake tremendously. Charizard closed his eyes and grabbed Swampert's arms with his hands, digging into them with his claws and throwing him off of him, slamming him on the ground in front of him. As Charizard looked down at Swampert and prepared for an attack, Swampert quickly grabbed Charizard's tail and tugged on it, sweeping Charizard off his feet and making him crash to the ground.

Mewtwo shot another blast at Mew as he laid pressed against the wall on the floor, but as it got close to him Mew telekinetically made it come to a stop, ripping the force apart. Mew flew back up and faced Mega Mewtwo X. He giggled which pissed Mewtwo off.

"You are an inferior me. I will destroy you." Mewtwo said to him.  
"Mew Mew Mew Mew. Meeeeeeee~" Mew replied.

Both formed large psychic shields as they clashed against each other, sending out psychic blasts one after another.  
They'r psychic bubbles clashed again and again, and they started pushing closer to each other, trying to break through to the other. They both grunted as they concentrated heavily for their psychic energy.

Charizard tried to get up but he was too fat. Swampert looked down over him and released a shot of water, but Charizard responded with a fire beam, which was retarded because the water easily overcame it and drenched Charizard. Charizard panted heavily as he got up, Swampert grabbing him and pushing him down. Charizard grunted and pulled himself up, overcoming Swampert's strength. Charziard grabbed Seampert's hands and pushed him forward. Swampert was caught of guard and started pushing back. They both pushed at each other as their eyes locked.

Mewtwo screamed as he cut through Mew's bubble, grabbing him by the throat and flying towards the ground, shoving him into the ground and pummeling him 10 ft under. He continued to throw punches at the Mew.

J watched as Mewtwo beat Mew up in slow motion. J dramatically took his glasses off as his mouth widely opened upon the sudden groundbreaking realization struck his mind.

"Wait a minute...what if...making Pokémon fight each other...is bad?" J asked.

"Geez ok that's enough Mewtwo, I think you should get back in your ball now" Moogle said, putting his Pokéball out and facing it at Mewtwo.

Mewtwo refused to go back in the ball, glaring at Moogle and grabbing the ball telepathically, smashing it off of Moogle's head and breaking it.

"Rude" Moogle said.

"GAY! GAY! Someone alert Mewtwo of the tier list because he's breaking all the laws" Cloud shouted, leaning over the railing.

Mewtwo snarled and clenched his fist. The railing broke and Cloud fell off, landing behind Mewtwo. Mewtwo punched Cloud and turned him to his back, shoving him down.  
Everyone gasp at the following events.

"did cloud did mewtwo haha!" Mike said.  
"No...Mewtwo did Cloud..." Alice said.

Mewtwo let out a loud cry as he flew out of the stadium to an unknown place as Cloud was crying on the stage, sucking his thumb and curled up in a ball.

"This is why we can't use legendaries" Moogle said.

"Mew! Mew! Nurse Kanga...will this Mew ever be able to be fucked by Element again?" Nicholas asked with concern, holding his beloved Mew in his arms as he approached her.  
"I'm...not sure...I'll have to run some tests...you should get back to your match..." Kanga said, taking the Mew from him and putting it in a trash bag.

The jumbo screen portraying GingeraleDragon, Nicholas, Mr. Moogle, and Pseudonym's icons had one Pokéball remaining under Gingerale, Nicholas, and Moogle's icons, with two under Pseudo. Five in all.

Nicholas sighed as he threw out his last Pokéball as Moogle threw his. They released Grovyle and Dragonite, respectively. The stones dug into Grovyle's feet and made his health go down a bit.

Grovyle immediately ran into battle. As Charizard pushed Seampert down, Grovyle leaped on top of Charizard. Charizard roared and took flight, flying off with Grovyle on his back.

"Sjru, fly after him!" Moogle commanded.  
"Aaaaa I might get hurt :c" Sjru said.

Moogle sighed and snacked the headphones off of Sjru's head.  
Dragonite flew towards Charizard and Grovyle.

As Dragonite and Charizard flew towards each other, they both charged large beams in their mouths. Grovyle's arms glee light green as he leaped off of Charizard, soaring downwards upon Swampert. Swampert let out an ice beam, but Grovyle wave dashed and avoiding it, reaching Swampert and swiping at him in an X shape. He continued to claw at Swampert, swiping at him one flaw after another and making him take a few steps back each time, finishing off with a blast of knees to knock him down. Dragonite released a dragon pulse as Charizard released a flamethrower. The two beams connected and they tried forcing more power into them. Eventually Charizard had the upper hand and the beam hit Dragonite, making him fly down a bit. He started growing tired as he flapped his wings again to keep him up.  
Grovyle lunged at Swampert for another blow, but Swampert used dive and disappeared beneath the stage. Grovyle watched around the floor anticipating Swampert's attack. Swampert jumped up above him and knocked him down. Swampert shot another ice beam but Grovyle rolled out of the way and quickly got to his feet. Swampert prepared a water attack as Grovyle ran towards him, sliding under him and kicking him off the ground. Swampert flew back. He tried to get up but with no success, finally defeated and bringing everyone down to their last Pokémon.

Pseudonym sent out Flareon.

[Pseudonym in le confession toilet]  
"I knew Nicholas was waiting to send out Grovyle last, so I planned for a counter"  
[le end{

Flareon dashed across the stage, tackling Grovyle immediately and gnawing at its neck.  
Dragonite flew directly into Charizard, knocking him back a bit. Charizard slapped Dragonite with his tail but Dragonite grabbed the tail and cuffed the fire at the end of it, making Charizard's eye open widely before he shut down completely, falling from the sky and crashing to the ground.  
Grovyle swiped at Flareon, knocking him off of him. As Grovyle for up, Flareon jumped on him, forcing him to the ground again. Flareon left another bite on Grovyle's neck, leaving a burn as he used fire fang. Grovyle stood tiredly, panting heavily as Flareon stood in front of him confidently.

"Nicholas now's the time. You need to evolve Grovyle. It's our only way to win. You can mega evolve and kick their ass" Gingerale said.  
"That's certainly an option, but consider this. Sceptile is ugly" Nicholas said

The fire at the end of Charizard's tail started blazing again. He lifted himself up the ground to meet with Dragonite face to face.

"Dragonite, hyper beam" Mr. Moogle ordered.

Dragonite stood back before releasing a huge attack upon Charizard, incoming him down and making him unable to move. Charizard's health fell to red, Grovyle's in yellow, Dragonite's in yellow, and Flareon's in green.

"We can't lose. We can't..." Gingerale said.

Flareon rushed at Grovyle' smashing into his head and making him collapse on Charizard. Gingerale gritted his teeth trying to think of something to do.

"You fricked up once again" Nicholas said.  
"Shut up Nicholas!" Gingerale said.

Gingerale tried to think of something.

[flashback]

Gingerale's mom looks over at a picture book dedicated to her late son once more as she gulps down another beer. Gingerale is in the living room watching TV to distract himself from the troubles of life.

"GUNGEEEEEEERALE YOU FILTHY ALUT SHY SHY COME AND KISS ME YOU ASSHOLE" His mom says as she walks into a glass window and falls through it.

The mom screams very loudly and Gingerale turns the volume of the TV up to block the noise.

"Aha! You did it, Pikachu!" Ash Kerchum, Pokémon enthusiast says to his yellow mouse Pokémon.

The episode ended and the credit theme rolled, playing the classic Pokémon theme song as Gingerale buries himself in his blankets. Next to him is an empty seat where nothing but Jr's Charizard cap lays.

[back to le present]

"What are they doing?" Moogle asked as he watched Gingerale blankly stare at a wall for five minutes.  
"Oh no...they must be using the drama effect. Anime loves adding dramatic and sad flashbacks in the middle of a fight to show how much the battle means to the characters and how far they've come. He must be using the power of the flashback to increase his chances of winning" Pseudonym said.  
"Oh shit that's right." Moogle said.  
"Maybe we can use our own flashback" Pseudonym suggested.  
"Hm, I can't. My life is pretty good." Moogle responded.

Dragonite out one foot on Charizard's stomach, pressing down and claiming his victory, stretching his arms out to bask in his glory.

Gingerale turned to Nicholas.

"Nicholas." Gingerale said.  
"What?" Nicholas asked.  
"Nothing." Gingerale said.  
"Charizard, Grovyle! You aren't out yet! You can do this!" Gingerale encouraged.

Charizard and Grovyle struggled to move.  
Gingerale sighed as he tried to think of something to do.

"It's to be expected. They both suck at Pokémon anyways" Luke said, making J angry.

J looked down and noticed the sadness upon Gingerale's face. He leaned over the railing and shouted down.

"DON'T GIVE UP! Gingerale and Nicholas are you going to just let these guys win like that? What kind of battle ends with everyone standing around for a few minutes trying to think of something, it's supposed to end with a bang. Give them that bang! You guys are my friends and I refuse to see you down. Now win this battle take home our new mascot help me find some jellyfish and we can all listen to me read 50 Shades of Grey like we always do!" he shouted.

Gingerale and Nicholas looked up at J.

"Still a faggot" Gingerale said.

Gingerale tried thinking of something to do. He closed his eyes and let some words fly out of his mouth.

"I wanna be, the very best, like no one ever was." Gingerale sang softly, the entire room went silent as his words were the only ones to emit through the stadium.  
"To catch them is my real test, to train them is my cause" Gingerale said, placing his hand over his heart.

The room was quiet for moment.  
Nicholas walked up next to Gingerale.

"I will travel across the land, searching far and wide. Each Pokémon, to understand" Nicholas sang.  
"The power there inside!" they sang together.

The room went silent once more.

"Pokémon! Gotta catch 'em all!" J sang from the stands by himself.

"It's you and me" Alice added.

"I know it's my destiny" Lemon added with a SMILE.

"Pokémon, oh your my best friend" StarForce sang.

"In a world we must defend" Isaac added.

The audience started clapping.

"Pokémon, gotta catch 'em all" Gingerale sang.  
"A heart so true" Nicholas sang.  
"Our courage will pull us through" everyone started singing together.

Charizard gained a sudden surge of strength, pulling himself off the ground. He grabbed Dragonite's leg and shoved him off. Charizard got on both feet.

"You teach me and I'll teach you" the entire stadium sang at once.

Charizard snorted smoke out of his nose as Grovyle picked himself up as well. They both eyes down their opponents Dragonite and Flareon.

"Pokémon! Gotta catch 'em all! Gotta catch 'em all!" Gingerale and Nicholas sang.

"Really? A flashback AND an encouraging song that makes his Pokémon gain the strength to keep fighting? How can we possibly beat that? Ok I have an idea, let's pretend we have cancer and the sadness of that will make our Pokémon win" Moogle suggested.

Grovyle climbed on Charizard's back as Flareon climbed upon Dragonite's. Their eyes stayed connected as they lifted themselves off the ground, flying high up in the sky.  
Charizard and Dragonite flew away from each other, flying towards the wall of the staid. After getting close enough they both took sharp turns and started flying directly for each other. Grovyle stood up as the wind blew his leave hair thing back. The wind also rustled Flareon's fur as he stood up. Charizard and Dragonite released two more powerful beams at each other, which came together and connected. Grovyle and Flareon both leaped off the backs of the Pokémon they were riding. Grovyle and Flareon met in midair, Flareon spit fire at Grovyle, making him burn. As the two fell towards the ground, Grobyle charged his arms out and sliced at Flareon. Flareon tried to bite Grovyle but he drifted away. The two crashed on the ground. They got up and ran towards each other. Flareon pounced for Grovyle, but Grovyle jumped up and avoided the attack, making Flareon fall face flat on the floor. Grovyle did a flip in midair as he dodged the attack. Landing on his feet, he summoned a tornado of leaves to attack Flareon. He then charged for him and sliced at him relentlessly, pushing back more and more with each slice. Flareon tried to endure it and spit fire at Grovyle, but the attacks were done in such succession that Flareon didn't have a moment to breathe. Grovyle eventually stopped and Flareon fell down gasping for air. Grovyle went for another slice but Flareon used flamethrower on him, burning his entire body. Flareon panted as he stood up, but Grovyle did too. He grabbed Flareon and he fire Pokémon waited for Grovyle's move, knowing he couldn't produce anything to wipe him out. But then a hyper beam fell from the sky and shot through Flareon, causing him to faint while he fell backwards. The burn remained on Grovyle, making him fall down and faint soon after as well, leaving only Charizard and Dragonite

"Why a Flareon? Such a stupid Pokémon" Element said.

"It was my brother's." Pseudonym said.

Dragonite and Charizard continued to fight each other.  
Charizard was hit by a hyper beam, knocking him to the ground. As Dragonite flew downwards to attack him, Charizard threw out a dragon pulse. Dragonite swiftly avoided it, letting it only skin him. Charizard got up once more and flew at Dragonite, letting the two collide. As they were together, Dragonite grabbed ahold of Charizard and held a tight grip as he flew high up in the sky. Dragonite did several loops with Charizard in hand, increasing speed with each loop, before flying down towards the ground at extreme speed and letting go of Charizard, letting him smash through the ground and fall down several feet. Charizard panted heavily as he tried to move again.

"Charizard..." Gingerale said.  
"This is getting really late I hope I still have time to go on r/vaporwave when we get back on the plane to mock their idiocy" Nicholas said.

Charizard closed his eyes and let his arm out.

The screen showed only Gingerale and Mr. Moogle, with a Charizard and Dragonite. Charizard was left with 1 HP while Dragonite had 70.

"I only have one hyper beam left. I got to make this one hit" Mr. Moogle said.  
"Did you use up all of your other moves? Because as far as I can tell any move that does any damage at all would suffice against him" Pseudonym said.  
"Ok somebody got sassy all of a sudden" Moogle said.

"This is my last shot, but I was saving it for last all along." Gingerale said, closing his eyes and pulling a ring out of his pocket.

Everyone watched in anticipation.

Gingerale picked the other ring out of his bracelet and placed the new one in, pressing down on it easily. Charizard slowly rose from the hole as he started to glow. His skin turned from orange to black, with a light blue stomach. A blue fire permanently blazed from his nostrils. He was now Mega Charizard X.

"Mega Charizard Y is better" Berserker whispered to the rest of the team.

Mega Charizard X roared as he flew up. Dragonite used a hyper beam, shooting directly at the Charizard, but he flew right into it with no hesitation. The beam lingered for several long seconds as Charizard slowly moved further into it and closer to Dragonite. Charizard kept one first forward as he flew harder into the light. Charizard's health slowly decreased on the screen as he moved more into the light and exposed himself to even more of the hyper beam attack. Dragonite stated to fly back a little as he noticed the distance between him and Charizard lowering. Mega Charizard X closed his eyes for a second and grunted as the hyper beam continued to go off, but he then roared and a great blast of fire came from his mouth, shooting Dragonite in the eye Dragonite clutched his eye as Charizard flew quickly up and socked Dragonite right in the jaw. Dragonite started to get dizzy as Charizard grabbed him with both arms and pulled him in for a hug. The two flew upwards and out of the stadium, into the night sky. They flew higher and higher until the stadium was barely visible. Charizard flew back down at increasing speed, letting his wings spring out to make the wind help him soar. As he flew down he took a sharp u-turn back up, and started circling. He continued going down and then back up, making him increase his speed with each passing loop until all that could be seen was a blur.

"That's...my move" Moogle complained.  
"Hm" Pseudo said.  
"Yes Charizard. Yes." Gingerale said.  
"Nicholas" Nicholas said.

All of the audience and haikuers looked up as the two dragon Pokémon came soaring down. Though the flight down was insanely quick, it felt like it lasted longer, and everyone could see the two clearly before they crashed.

High in the sky, Charizard makes one final sharp turn down, bringing him and Dragonite down at tremendous speed.

"Yeah, I do think he's real. And I'll find him one day"

Charziard and Dragonite started twirling as they moved faster towards the ground headfirst. The wind brushed greatly against their faces.

"I'll train him to be the greatest Pokémon. And I'll play with him every day."

The two dragons flew through the ceiling, descending down past the haikuers watching and getting closer to the ground, continuing to twirl.

"Through the spirit of him, we'll always have each other"

Charizard and Dragonite crashed into the ground, a great wave of dust covered the entire stadium as they dug themselves deep into the ground. As the dust started to clear, they could see deep in the hole that Charizard was still huffing whole Dragonite laid unconscious beside him. Gingerale and Nicholas won.

le plane:

Eden was just finishing up on taking a poo when Jp confronted her outside the bathroom.

"Alright Eden. Who should we vote for?" Jp asked.  
"Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm hoooooooooooooooooooooooookkmmmmmmmmmmmmm Rydli perhaps?" Eden suggested.  
"Eden we can't vote Rydli off now he's handicapped we'll look offensive" Jp says.  
"Wait if we aren't going to vote for handicapped people because it's offensive does that mean we can't vote for autistic people?" Eden asked.  
"Eden the use of that word was uncalled for." Jp complained.  
"No I mean genuinely autistic people I wasn't using it derogatorily" Eden explained.  
"Oh. What were we talking about again?" Jp asked.  
"I don't know. So Rydli?" Eden suggested.  
"Sure" Jp said.  
"Not so fast" a voice said dramatically.

Rydli wheeled out from the shadows, giving the girls an arrogant glance.

"You know it's not as dramatic when you're in a wheelchair, it actually looks kinda funny" Eden said.  
"There's nothing funny about disabled people" Rydli said.  
"Durrrr I'm in a wheelchair duuuuuuurrrrrr I'm Rydki" Jp mimicked.

The three were silent for a moment.

"Well I do say that, that was an admittedly spot on impression. The reason I'm here is because I know about your little alliance. It would terrible if the rest of the team were to find out..." Rydli said.  
"I don't think anyone cares about two-person alliances, it's kind of a given among lots of friends. And who's to say they'll believe you. You think they'll believe any type of accusation thrown at them?" Jp asked.  
"You can say anything about anyone and most people will believe it" Rydli said.  
"So then we can say you're private messaging Element and Moogle to decide votes together" Eden said.  
"What. That's not even true, what the heck don't say that out loud! I don't even vote don't let them think I'm up to sneaky business" Rydli protested.  
"And we can also say you rigged the votes to get rid of Dausername" Jp said.  
"I did NOT. These are legitimately lies. Look, ok. Ok? Ok. So. Let's vote together and your team business doesn't get leaked" Rydli suggested.  
"What's stopping us from both voting against you tonight?" Eden asked.  
"Oh my god manipulating people is so much more stressful than I thought it would be. Just vote for Grenade and I'll help you with future votes" Rydli said, turning around and wheeling into a wall, making him fall off.

[Jp in le confession toilet]  
"Grenade? My bro...but sacrifices must be made."  
[le end]

The Troll Slaiiiiiiiiiyers were in the elimination room. The Admin was standing at his podium, his face laying on it flatly.

"Hey, are we going to get this thing started already?" Marrowsky asked as he walking into the room.

"Huh? Oh yeah sure. Let's cut to it. Everyone voted. And by everyone I mean Marrowsky and the people Imboo forcefully dragged into the confession toilet. The results are right here" Admin said, shaking a passport book.  
"Also, J this is not your team so your vote will not count" Admin said.  
"Dang it" J sighed, getting out of his seat and walking out of the room.

[Mr. Moogle in le confession toilet]  
"Well we may have lost but we did great. Me and Pseudo gave it our all and had a great time."  
[le end]

"The first two Mountain Dews go to our almost winners, Mr. Moogle and Pseudonym. The latter of which finally did something." Admin said, tossing each a can.

"You deserve it, Pseudonym and...uh...Kyle" Kirby said.  
"It's Drew, but thanks." Mr. Moogle said, clanking his can with Psuedo's.

14 members of the team remained un-dewed.

"Element and Shinxy, you two are also safe. Along with Jp and Joe" Admin continued.

Element caught his and Shinxy's cans with his fedora, and Shinxy came in his pants. Jp smiled and Joe pumped her fists.

Marrowsky, Grenade, Cloud, Kirby, Rydli, Pantz, DryBones, Eden, Carz, and. Ziggy were left.

"Dick. Ass. Shit. Minion. Grounded. Caliou. Help." Carz said.  
"Can you keep it down, I'm watching the Nintendo Direct and don't appreciate your language there bud" DryBones said.

"Carz! Ziggy! Safe! Also safe, Cloud and Gluvr!" Admin said, tossing the four cans.

"eeeee, another day" Gluvr said, hugging Cloud.  
"Another day of not playing Melee? Then sigh" Cloud sighed.

Marrowsky, Grenade, Pantz, Rydli, DryBones and Eden were still sitting, stating at the Amdin waiting for their can.

"One of you are going home tonight..." Admin said.

"Who's Iwata?" DryBones asked as he continued watching his phone.

"Marrowsky. Pantz. DryBones." Admin said one after another, Marrowsky caught his can with one hand, Pantz with two, and the can struck DryBones' head.

Grenade, Rydli, and Eden were left.

Grenade shrugged.  
Rydli fell asleep.  
Eden started sweating.

"Grenade, Grenade, Grenade. Atrocious performance in the battle today. Rydli, lots of drama behind you outside the game. Eden, as this ballot says, "unimportant"." Admin said.

"Well I got 11th last time which is better than a lot of people can say" Eden defended.  
"It's fine. I did slightly better than last time. At this rate I should have a shot at winning in another 20 seasons" Grenade said.  
"Actually, Grenade. You aren't the one going home. You and Rydli are both safe" Admin exclaimed, throwing the last two cans toward them.

Grenade caught his with an astonished expression, Rydli snored. Eden's jaw dropped.

"What? Me? Why me? I thought you guys liked me..." Eden said.  
"Sorry Eden I was going to vote for DryBones but I didn't want to be offensive to autistic people" Element said.  
"OMQ. Pokémon Red Blue and Yellow confirmed for eShop? OMQ OMQ OMQ I NEED THIS!" DryBones screamed, jumping out of his seat and running away.

"Eden. Drop of shame awaits, yo" Admin said, holding her parachute for her.

Eden dreadfully strapped it on as she walked toward the door. She looked back at her team sadly.

"Good luck guys. Jp, Kirby, Lemon. Yeah...hey can I ask Jirachi to wish me immunity?" Eden asked.  
"No. But hey while you're struck in Unova maybe you can catch a Mawile to keep" Admin suggested.  
"Oh yeah!" Eden said, jumping out of the plane.

"How exactly is Eden supposed to find her way home from a fictional realm?" Pseudonym asked.  
"Hm. Didn't think of that. Maybe we'll find out at the wrap party" Admin said, walking toward Gingerale and Nicholas, who were standing by the door.

Gingerale whistled.

"One more down" Gingerale said.

"So. You guys decide which Pokémon you want to keep?" Admin asked.

Gingerale and Nicholas huddled closer.

"Ok so. Hm. I say we get a Garchomp so the team can have sex with it" Gingerale suggested it.  
"Uh, well that's good for you maybe but how is that good for me?" Nicholas asked.  
"What do you mean, the entire team gets it. It's a win win situation, I can have sex with it, you can have sex with it..." Gingerale explained.  
"Ok but I don't want to have sex with a Garchomp" Nicholas said.  
"How about, how about Arceus?" Nicholas asked.  
"Well then we'd just win the whole game automatically. We basically have a God that will make us win everything" Gingerale said.  
"Right, what's the problem in that?" Nicholas asked.  
"Well then there'd be no point, it wouldn't fun if we didn't earn all of our badass wins. How about, hmm. Lapras, gotta be Lapras" Gingerale said.  
"Again, that only benefits you because you're the only one on our team that would want to fuck it. And wouldn't it just die on the plane with no water to soak in?" Nicholas asked.  
"Alright Mr. Technical. What do you suggest?" Gingerale asked.  
"Hm. Uhm, uh, hmm...Latias?" Nicholas suggested.  
"No" Gingerale said.  
"Well we can't choose Grovyle because it would just be more Grovyle torture porn" Nicholas said.  
"Beefcake" Gingerale said.  
"Ampharos so we can have the sigh whenever we want" Nicholas said.  
"Even better, Kurtis the Snivy" Gingerale suggested.  
"NO. NO. You can't just capture some random Snivy and call it Kurtis. Kurtis will have his day and it will be the REAL him. But not now...not some fake Snivy..." Nicholas said.  
"Uhhhh geez. Ok what other Pokémon are important to us...Grenigga?" Gingerale asked.  
"Eh" Nicholas said.  
"Pikachu" Gingerale said.  
"Too generic" Nicholas said.  
"Ok. Garchomp Jesus, I think it might be the best option for us" Gingerale suggested.  
"Garchomp Jesus? Hm, well. Alright. That sounds good. I think we've come to a decision" Nicholas said, facing Admin.  
"Who will it be?" Admin asked.  
"Adam Sandler" Gingerale said.  
"What? No! We did not agree to that. Forget what he said, we pick Garchomp Jesus" Nicholas corrected.  
"Oh. Guess we'll have to tell Adam Sandler we cancelled our plans then" Admin said, hanging up his phone.  
"You contacted Adam Sandler in the 4 seconds since I said it?" Gingerale asked.  
"Yes. But it doesn't matter, your choice has been made. Garchomp it is" Admin said, walking away.

"Bullishly. We totally deserve a mascot of our own" Cloud complained.  
"We can have Tim!" Joe smiled, petting Tim as he smoked a bong next to him.  
"Kill all niggers" Tim coughed, throwing up all over Joe.  
"That's just Bless in cartoon form" Cloud said.  
"I fucked 0 bitches today" Tim sighed, reaching for his penis.

Shinxy sighed and Element was checking Steam on his phone. Shinxy sighed louder and Element moved away a bit. Shinxy tackled Element.

"Something wrong Shinxy?" Element asked.  
"A" Shinxy replied.  
"Cool. I'm gonna go sit down and stare at the wall, see ya later" Element said, walking away.  
"How are things with Matthew, Shinxy?" Nicholas asked.  
"orh" Shinxy answered.  
"Are you two still dating?" Nicholas asked.  
"nahbah" Shinxy said.  
"Gasp, oh my goooosh, are you ok?" Nichola asked.  
"Wait, you've been dating Matthew for pretty much this whole game and have still tried to fuck me?" Element asked.  
"Nah" Shinxy said.  
"Go away Element you already discarded yourself form the scene. Shinxy, I know just the guy that can help you out" Nicholas said, grabbing Shinxg by the shirt and dragging him across the floor.  
"I didn't get to bite element ~_~" Shinxh complained.

Riley was relaxing in his first class chair.

"Ah, refreshing. Eh Shadow?" Riley asked.  
"You idiot, you didn't work on your review AGAIN" Shadow complained.  
"Relax Shadow, relax. I just delayed the EarthBound review until later, I'll work on other games until then. Right now I want to focus on making friends" Riley said.  
"Hey Riley, maybe you should review Shadow the Hedgehog. Sounds like a conical scenario, seeing as though, you know, you have a Shadow doll, so he could...commentate...on...it..." Lemon said as Riley stared at him.  
"I'm sorry?" Shadow said.  
"It's alright Shadow I got this" Riley said.  
"What did that IMBECILE call me!?" Shadow asked.  
"It's ok Shadow, look Lemon he doesn't like the term doll" Riley explained.  
"I'm not a freakin DOLL" Shadow shouted.  
"Alright..." Lemon said nervously, nodding his head as he sank into his seat

Riley sighed as he grabbed his plush to hold him down. Riley's Pokéwalker shined under the light before it dimmed.

Gingerale laid back in his seat, reclining back and putting his hands behind his head. He thought about Gingerale Jr. as he took his Charizard cap off and closed his eyes.

Mew flew by the plane, giggling as it passed by Element's window.

End of Day 88  
Initiation at 23.68%  
2-12-5-19-19 / 16-15-5 / 19-8-9-14-24-25 / 3-8-1-18-12-25 /1-14-4 / 1-13-1-14-4-1 / 20-15-4-4  
20-8-5-19-5 / 1-18-5 / 20-8-5 / 15-14-5-19 / 23-8-15 / 8-1-22-5 / 2-5-5-14 / 18-5-10-5-3-20-5-4  
1-14 / 1-12-12-9-1-14-3-5 / 13-1-25 / 19-5-5-13 / 15-4-4  
2-21-20 / 12-5-20 / 9-20 / 14-15-20 / 2-5 / 21-14-5-24-16-5-3-20-5-4


	11. Haiku Drama's Spooktacular

Chapter 10: Haiku Drama's Spooktacular Nightmare Before Danksgiving Halloweeb Special and the Mystery of the Anonymous Anon

Evening had crept up on the world. The plane flew through the twilight sky as it neared its next destination.

"Japan Japan Japan Japan we gotta get there eventually right come on!" DryBones pleaded.  
"Hey DryBones. Shut your mouth perhaps." Cloud suggested.

The Troll Slaiyers were sitting on the benches against the walls, 8 on one side and 7 on the other.

"Kinda surprised I didn't get voted off last time" Grenade confessed.  
"Yeah try being one of the last to receive their cans every single time" Rydli said.  
"Hey Rydli, are your legs healed?" Gluvr asked.  
"Yes, I've been exercising with leg stretches twice as much to strengthen them." Rydli said.  
"Now instead of sitting in that wheelchair all day you can join the rest of us on sitting on these benches all day" Pseudonym noted.  
"Hey the lower class isn't all that bad gang, we can play stuff like Yahtzee and I Spy" Kirby said optimistically.  
"Haha. Dank." Ziggy said.

[Jp in le confession toilet]  
"Eden got voted off. No! My alliance has fallen apart, if I don't find someone to help me out I could be doomed too..."  
[le end]

"Hey Pantz. Pantz. Yo, Pantz. Pantz. Pantz, dawg. Pantz. Hey. Hey. Pantz. Yo Pantz. It's me, Joe. PANTZ!" Joe screamed as Pants hid behind her sketchbook.

Cloud checked his breath as he slid closer to Pantz. Cloud tried to think of sometime smooth to say as he coughed to catch her attention.

"Shrek" Cloud said.  
"Oh hi Mark." Pantz replied.  
"Hi" Coloud said, gaining sweat.

Pantz went back to watching the wall.

"So, uhhhh?" Cloud asked.  
"Oh. Hey guys. Is this seat taken?" Ziggy asked as he walked up to them.  
"Yes" Cloud said.  
"This one? Right here?" Ziggy asked as he sat down between Cloud and Pantz.  
"Hey Ziggy" Pantz smiled.  
"Oh hey Pantz. Did Cloud tell you about how I kicked his ass in Smash? He got owned. Hard. Like my dick right now. Hard. And I'm not even erect." Ziggy said.

Ziggy showed Pantz his phone and she admired the video of Cloud getting his ass kicked by Ziggy.

"Wow I didn't know you were better at Smash than Cloud" Pantz said.  
"Ok nobody is going to record themselves getting their ass kicked of course everyone is only going to show the videos where they are doing good." Cloud said.  
"Guess Cloud got smoked :'). But what else is new? It's always been clear Cloud is the biggest weenie on the plane" Ziggy said.  
"I didn't die fag I didn't make it back because my penis hit the stick and I missed up my QA" Cloud defended.  
"no jons"  
"More like no jacks because I was jacking off our entire session that's right Ziggy i kicked your ass with one hand. Wasn't even my full power"  
"You were jacking off because you were arroused by me? Gay"  
"Hey guys. I don't find this interesting. So, yeah. Can we just skip to my part?" Element asked.  
"Screw you Ziggy I'll kick your ass live. Like, in front of people and stuff" Cloud threatened.  
"Oh I thought this was going to be a Pantz thing. Like, I finally get to do something. Since I've just kinda been here so far, so..." Pantz said.

No one said anything for a moment.

"So fagger once the Cloud DLC comes out I'll kick your ass into Oblivion. Then to Morrowind. Then to Skyrim." Ziggy said.  
"Ok lol. We'll see about that bitch" Cloud replied.  
"Oh yeah! Cloud's in Smash. I bet Cloud's pretty excited, considering he named himself after the character and all" Kirby said.  
"I didn't...I named it af-..never mind" Cloud sighed.  
"Cloud gets trolled" Ziggy said.

"Speaking of Shinxy, where is he?" Moogle asked.  
"Don't care. Oh shit almost forgot to plug. /Element921" Element reminded everyone.  
"People still use ask?" Moogle asked.

Marrowsky walked into the room, closing the door behind him.

"Where were you are for in the past preceding this Marowsky?" Joe asked.  
"Eating breakfast. It's the most important mean of the day" Marrowsky reminded everyone.  
"We were just talking about , aka Haiku purgatory" Moogle said.  
"Hey Marrowsky swing me a question or two, I'm bored" Element asked.  
"Well let's see what kind of quality responses you've been providing so I know you're someone who posts valuable answers." Marrowsky replied, taking out his phone and entering the site.

Marrowsky read through Element's answers.

"Nah, no, ew, fuck that, ew, no, nah, no, why are you asking me this, no, why are you asking me this, stop sending me Haikik questions, what the fuck, nah, what, no, stop sending me these questions" Marrowsky read.  
"Ok that's totally out of context you skipped the good ones to make me look stupid  
"What the heck? 8000 answers? Why haven't we gotten that much?" Pantz asked.  
"Who cares it's just ask" Moogle said.  
"Of course someone irrelevant like you would say that" Cloud said.  
"You know this conversation is getting a little tense, why don't we change the subject?" Moogle requested.

[Element in le confession toilet]  
"It's not my fault I attract weirdos...says the SHINX_FUCKER. Ok never mind"  
[le end]

Nicholas was sitting at a booth with Shinxy sitting next to him, StarForce sat across from the two.

"Any results yet?" Nicholas asked.  
"Hmmm, oh yeah! Based on Shinxy's profile, we found approximately 40,828,928 people that would be interested in dating him" StarForce explained.  
"What the, what did you put on his profile?" Nicholas asked.  
"Nothing we just showed his icon. That's enough for furries to want to diddly diddly do each other" StarForce explained.

Nicholas banged his fist off the table dramatically.

"Gosh DARN IT StarForce, Shinxy deserves more than some random person fixin for a yiffin, he needs someone who cares about him Sincerely, someone that Knows him, and wants the best for him..." Nicholas said.  
"Niggers and Jews are shit, but if I ever come across a nigger jew I'll kill myself" Shinxy said.

[Nicholas in le confession toilet]  
"You may have noticed that lately I haven't been cursing that much. The thing is my mom found out about this show so I have to watch my mouth, or else I'll...but I guess she was perfectly fine with me being kidnapped and sent flying around the world, so long as I don't use any potty words! Hopefully she saw the episode where I got crucified"  
[le end]

[Shinxy in le confession toilet]  
Shinxy sticks his head in the toilet and his face is sucked into it as feces fly around his face.  
[le end]

"So Shinxy, I think a good way to improve your..."personality", is to control your racial slurs" Nicholas said.  
"Niggers" Shinxy replied.  
"This is exactly what I'm talking about! Shinxy I hate to break it to ya but just because you say something offensive doesn't make it funny" Nicholas said.  
"Gingerale should kill himself and yew should fuck his dead body" Shonxy suggested.  
"Shinxy! Shinxy!" Nicholas said.  
"What's up, ladies" Gingerale said, sliding into the seat and pushing Shinxy and Nicholas to the wall. Gingerale out his hands behind his head and put his feet on the table as he let out a refreshing fart.  
"Not this again -_-" Nicky sighed.  
"What?" StarForce asked.  
"Oh. Nothing. Just jacked off for three consecutive sessions. I, feel, great." Gingerale said.  
"Wow, good for you!" StarForce smiled.  
"Ok Gingerale there's a seat right next to StarForce why would you sit next to me and Shinxy and create less room. Secondly, nobody cares about your fap stories" Nicholas admitted.  
"But man. Like, I never realized cum would be so hot..." Gingerale said.  
"What? It isn't hot? You're such a fapping noob" Nicholas said.  
"Well, not hot. But. Like...warm...so anyways, my cum dried pretty quickly, which perplexed me. The nice peely semen on my waist beckoned me with its coy shape, begging for me to-"  
"End your lofe" Nicholas said.

[Nicholas in le confession toilet]  
"Gingerale had his first fap like a week ago, our little Ginge Cringe is growing up...but he won't stop talking about his experiences. But I must wonder, after all these years of not jerkin, he must have released like a sperm whale amount of jizz...masturbating is appropriate to talk about right? It's just swears I shouldn't say?"  
[le end]

"Oh, fellas! I almost forgot. I'm going to be giving away a $100 steam gift card to a random winner. Want to enter my raffle?" StarForce asked.  
"StarForce. You are a bro." Nicholas said.  
"StarForce where do you Evn get all of this money?" Gingerale asked.  
"Oh, well, the furry prostitute industry is booming. Just wanted to do something nice as a treat for my friends :" StarForce explained.

[Gingerale the Dragon in le confession toilet]  
"What a beautiful day. Got my Garchomp Jesus on board, fapped three times today, and StarForce might hand me $100. Nothing can ruin my chipper attitude"  
[le end]

"Hey guys" J greeted.  
"Hey J" StarForce greeted.  
"So me and Marrowsky were eating together on the storage are, and he called me his kohai ahhahahahahahahaaaa..." J said.

Gingerale pinched his eyes and sighed.

"Ok J. Stop. No more talking about Marrowsky. No more talking about anime. No more sticking your dick in jellyfish" Gingerale said.  
"Oh come on that was ONE time" J rolled his eyes.  
"J you're openly admitting conversing with the other team" Nicholas said.  
"Well we're sitting with Shinxy" StarForce defended.  
"Shut up StarForce" Nicholas said.  
"Yeah, wait, whaaaaaat?" J asked.  
"No anime, J. Ok. No anime. No. Anime." Gingerale ordered.  
"Right. So on this show RWBY there's this character named Ruby and I was almost NAMED Ruby, even though my birthstone topaz I identify as my ancient stone Ruby" J explained.  
"Alright Nicholas, huddle up. I think it's time we kick J out of the alliance" Gingerale said.  
"Wait that alliance thing was real? I thought it was just a ploy to get J to cut himself. We haven't mentioned it since" Nicholas said.  
"Nicholas! How could you say that?" Gingerale asked.  
"I'm just saying we never even vote with each other. It seems kinda pointless and we're risking other people discovering our alliance and voting us off for being in one. I think if anyone is voting with each other they're probably doing it in private and not in public like us idiots are" Nicholas said.  
"Shut up Nichlas! We've only lost once since the alliance formed anyways" Gingerale said.  
"Are you guys talking about the alliance?" Isaac asked.  
"Oh good grief, look what you did J, you were shouting about the alliance so loud everyone heard you" Gingerale said.  
"No, I'm actually part of the alliance. Remember?" Isaac asked.  
"Oh yeah! Hey" J greeted.  
"And that's the way the news goes. That was a Rick and Morty reference." Isaac explained.  
"Hey Isaac, want to enter my raffle for a chance to win $100?" StarForce asked.  
"Sure. I could spend it on broadening my taste for fandoms" Isaac said.  
"Whatever just as long as the winner doesn't spend it all on Undertale shit" Gingerale said.  
"Did somebody say Undertale?" Reu asked.

Gingerale groaned.

"Hey maybe if you go touch yourself again you'll feel better" Isaac suggested.  
"You guys having a bad time? Just wondering if anime is real over here, if you know what I mean. This guy knows what's up" Reu said, bumping his elbow info Nicholas' chest.  
"Reu I think you've made more posts about Undertale in the last month than the accumulation of everything else you've posted in the past year" Gingerale said.  
"Wow, what an exaggeration. Stop belittling me, man. I'm having a bad time" Reu said.  
"I don't give a HECK about the time it is that you are having. I want Undertale cringe to DIE and you to die with it!" Gingerale shouted.

Reu sighed.

"Fine. If that's how it is I guess I'll go back to my Jojo memes" Reu said.  
"Weeb trash" Gingerale said.  
"Ok I'll join the amiibo craze, that sounds like an adventure" Reu said.  
"Holy shit Reu, this is why you only have 32 fans." Gingerale said.  
"31 actually" Reu admitted.  
"Just go sit in a corner or something" Gingerale said, brushing him away.

Reu sadly walked away

Garchomp Jesus was sleeping soundly on the floor, and Shinxy slowly inched himself on top of him. Nicholas slapped Shinxy's hand, knocking him off the Garchomp.

"No!" Nicholas said.

Reu walked away from the group, sitting next to Stickboy, who was on his laptop, which sat on his lap.

"Hey Reu, feeling a-ok?" Stickboy asked.  
"No actually, I-"  
"Yeah I don't care. Look, I just successfully ordered myself a Mewtwo amiibo. Gonna look great with my collection" Stickboy said.  
"Nice job wasting your money." Lukeguy congratulated.  
"Hey come on Luke, amiibo are pretty cool. They're just figures of characters we like, I don't see how it's any dumber than buying a plush toy. It's not like we're buying dumb things like Mii Fighters" Reu said.  
"Oh yeah Reu, check this out. Already got my Mii Fighter three pack" Stickboy said, opening his chest and presenting his collection to him.  
"Wow...such iconic characters" Reu complimented.

Luke rolled his eyes.

"You really have all the current amiibo?" Reu asked.  
"Yup." Stickboy said.  
"It's not like he posts about it all the time" Luke said.  
"That's pretty cool, my collection is still building" Reu said, ignoring Lukeguy.  
"Yeah, I'm proud of all this. But nothing will ever top my favorite, lovely, Wii Fit Trainer" Stickboy said, picking her up and holding her in his palm, the light gleamed off her plastic face.

Robot bumped into Stickboy's seat, knocking the amiibo out of his hand and causing it to fall to the floor.

"Whoops, sorry...oh man I shouldn't have done that I'm the stupidest person on Earth" Robot groaned.  
"No problem emo, I'll just pick it up" Stickboy said, leaning downwards.

The plane titled downwards as it began its descent, the amiibo started rolling down the floor. It smashed against the wall and stopped rolling.

"WAIT! NO!" Stickboy screamed, falling out of his seat, all of his amiibo toppled out of his box and onto the floor. Stickboy collected himself and ran towards his Wii Fit Trainer.

As he neared it, the amiibo wobbled a bit, then slipped out the door of the plane, flying downwards.

"NO! NO!" Stickboy screamed, he stuck his head out the window and put his hand out in desperation as he watched his lovely Wii Fit Trainer fall. The intensity of the wind pulled him out of the plane too, and he fell to the ground.  
"Good, death." Luke said.

Lemon picked up Game & Watch amiibo and wobbled it a bit.

"You think we can sell this for double the price if we put it in a box tilted and claim it's a defect?" Lemon asked.

"Evening, passengers. Enjoying your flight?" Admin asked as he walked in.  
"Stickboy just decided to end his life, so yes." Nicholas said.  
"Just wanted to remind everypony that this IS a Halloween special, so to celebrate, you all can dress up as whatever you want" Admin said.

[Robot in le confession toilet]  
"Finally. The time of the year I can dress up as R.O.B. and not be scolded for it"  
[le end]

"A little late, aren't we?" Marrowsky asked.

The Troll Slaiyers started to walk into the room and gather around the basket of clothes Admin brought in.

"Yeah, we're so late we might as well just have a Thanksgiving special instead" Kirby suggested suggested.  
"Thanksgiving was last month though." Marrowsky said.  
"Ugh, freakin Canadians. I hate them so much they should all just die" Cloud said.  
"Ok" Pantz said.  
"Except for you, Pantz. You're a cool Canadian" Cloud said.  
"Ok" Pantz said.  
"Wait Thanksvifn isn't the same everywhere!?" Kirby asked.  
"Yeah believe it or not, not all countries celebrate Thanksgiving on the same day, must don't celebrate it at all." Pseudonym said.  
"Yeah, so like Thanksgiving not everybody celebrates Halloween on the same day, so some place is bound to celebrate it this late" Admin said.  
"No October 31st is the only day, you're just stupid" Pseudo said.  
"Whatever, whatever. We're going to a spooky place anyways, so it doesn't matter" Admin insisted.  
"Is it France?" J asked.  
"Too soon." Grenade replied.  
"Auschwitz" Shinxy suggested.  
"We're going to Transylvania. Ok, Transylvania. Romania." Admin said.

The haikuers all pressed themselves against the wall as they peered out the window. In the far distance they could see the fortress sitting atop a large hill surrounded by trees. Some crows flew away from the castle. The twilight sky began to darken as they all turned their attention to the road leading to the castle.

"Whoa, Bran Castle?" J asked.  
"That's right, you freak. We're heading to Bran Castle, commonly called Dracula's Castle, which is often connected to the popular character's origin. The challenge is pretty straightforward, spend the night in the castle to win." Admin explained.  
"That's it?" Marrowsky asked.  
"Yeah. Try not to get spooked. Also it would be pretty easy to try to sleep through the night, so you have to stay up all night during the challenge" Admin continued.  
"If you make one step out of the castle, you're out of the challenge" Admin finished.

[Lukeguy in le confession toilet]  
"Easiest challenge yet. I don't get scared of anything. I'm used to staying inside dark creepy rooms for long periods of time anyways."  
[le end]

The haikuers were digging through the piles of materials to pick out their costumes.

"Can't believe a stupid Pokémon like Charizard won the last challenge" Cloud said.  
"U mad bro? Yeah yeah I bet u mad" Nichols said.  
"Charizard is honestly a faggot. I don't like him. How did a stupid Pokémon like him get into Smash anyways?" Cloud asked.  
"Yeah, it's almost as if Charizard is one of be most iconic and highly recognized Pokémon ever or something" Pseudo said.  
"Shit, anybody have the Charizard shitpost?" Cloud asked.  
"No" Ziggy said.  
"Fuck you Pseduo!" Cloud said.  
"I'm glad the location was Unova though, the Best Pokémon Games took place there" Luke said.  
"Well maybe story wise but the other games were pretty fun..." Berserker said.  
"The story was Top Notch, the story in X and Y was shit after following an amazing one like Black and Why" Luke said.  
"Well story isn't evening. It's not like people play Pokémon for the story anyways" Berserker said.  
"If you don't play Pokémon for the story you're a mindless consumer" Luke said.  
"I disagree" Berserker said.  
"You're an idiot" Luke replied.  
"Haha, nice one Luke. You're right, Black and White? Impeccable games. You're so cool man." Riley said.

[Riley in le confession toilet]  
"So I think I found out the way to end me and Luke's conflict and make him like me. The secret to gaining Luke's approval is agreeing with everything he says and kissing his ass"  
[le end]

Element pulled a hat out of the basket as Gingerale stretches his arms near him.

"Wow. Just had the most A-MAZ-ING fap" Gingerale said.  
"Um. Ew" Element said.  
"So much came out I was like 'oh wee down boy'" Gingerale said.  
"Uh, TMI...don't need to hear that..." Element said.  
"Sorry, but dude. It feels so great. Like, wow, I wasn't expecting it to be that good. Honestly I tried fapping before but it turns out I was just doing it wrong. I didn't know you were supposed to keep doing it until stuff came out" Gingerale explained.  
"Dude that's gross. Like, really? Nobody needs to hear that" Element said.  
"Really Element? So you think fap talk is gross?" Gingerale asked.

[le flashback]  
"So I went to the bathroom to jack off but I saw a daddy long legs and was like "HOLY SHIT" and then left"

"I want to fap so badly but my brother is in the next room over and our walls are like paper thin"

"I was about to jack off to this comic but the plot started investing me and I couldn't stop reading"

"I'm going to delete Skype because I was jacking off and Gingerale called me in the middle of my fap"

"Whoa I think I've fapped to that before"

"Alright guys, it's time I come clean. I'm into vore"

"God damn it I tried jacking off and my cat thought my boner was a toy and was swiping at it"  
[le end]

"Ok that last one didn't even happen. And people are always talking about me being a freak I might as well embrace it" Element defended.  
"Whatever you say. But man, nothing BEATS a good fap my dude" Gingerale said.

After selecting their costumes, all of the haikuers hopped off the plane one by one, landing on the rich soil on the ground. Most surrounded the area as the sky became gloomier, they looked up to see the road leading to the castle. A bunch of carriages lead by horses were waiting for them. Admin leaped off the hood of the plane to look cool, sporting a Caitlyn Jenner costume. Imboo hopped out next, wearing Fox's uniform.

"Oh yeah Imboo turned into a furry randomly and we haven't acknowledged it yet" Alice said.  
"Yeah, I hope Wolf gets into Smash. I love Fox dick. I need some yiff" Imboo said.  
"Not all furries are obsessed with yiff. Such a bad way to generalize us" Marrowsky said.  
"Yeah!" Element agreed.  
"Oh wait that's literally the only reason I'm a furry and I think other furries are cringey never mind Marrowsky I'm not with you on this" Element said.  
"I'm with Marr" J said.  
"J! No more Marrowsky talk" Gingerale said.  
"Whaaaaaaat?" J asked.  
"I can't believe it's the one time of the year you can crossdress and it would be normal and you decide to dress up as an anime character instead" Gingerale said.  
"Are you saying crossdressing isn't normal? Because that's a pretty close minded perception you have there. Let people do whatever they want!" Kirby said.  
"Can I lynch niggers" Shinxy asked.  
"If that makes you happy!" Kirby said.

The haikuers started boarding the carriages in groups of 5, with one carriage having 6 passengers. The horses started carrying them to the castle.

"Sounds like a s-s-s-spooky challenge" DryBones said.  
"Maybe we'll see some spooky skeletons" Grenade said.

From a nearby carriage Alice heard the conversation.

"Oh yeah! Speaking of skeletons, my costume is-"

Ding!

"Save it for the musical number Alice. Time for an ominous song" Admin said.

[Song #13 - It's Not Halloween]  
(To the tune of This Is Halloween)

Admin: Boys and girls and non-binaries  
Would you care to give us a tease?

Follow this road, full of non-living  
On this night of Thanksgiving

All: It's not Halloween, it's not Halloween  
We're a little late because of our flight

It's not Halloween, everybody make a meme  
A night at Dracula's might give us a fright  
Say it again, everybody meme  
As we pretend it's Halloween

Alice: I am the blue hooded Skelly named Sans  
Lukeguy: I am naked from my feet to my hands

Cloud: I'm Cloud Strife, as the name implies  
Pantz: I am Aerith, the one who always dies

This is Thanksgiving, this is Thanksgiving  
Thanksgiving! Danksgiving! Thankgving! Thanksgiving!

Lemon: To this castle full of sin  
I'm dressed as the sailor called Gilligan

Element: Another challenge, I'm sure to win  
I'm sticking to my moan, M Bison

Gingerale: Round that carriage, weebs hiding in the trash can  
Something's waiting now to meme, and how  
you'll scream

Scream! This isn't Halloween  
Sombrero on my head, Dunban seen

Aren't you scared?

Reu: Well, that's just fine  
Is anime real man?  
Caesar is who I am  
Nicholas: I chose Hitler, I'm gonna execute Sam

All: Everybody meme, everybody meme

On our belated Halloween

J: Me and Marr are Twinsies, dressed from Black Butler  
Marrowsky: I'm the Sebastion to his Ciel, I can concur

Moogle: I am the Standard Oil founder Rockfeller  
Shinxy: I'm dressed in black, just like a nigger

StarForce: I'm a ninja turtle, but which one?  
Sam: I'M A BANANA, LOOK AT ME MOVE

This is Thanksgiving, this is Thanksgiving  
Thanksgiving! Danksgiving! Thankgiving! Thanksgiving!

Kirby: Dressed as Pikachu is me Kirby  
Carz: Gonna fuck a Waddle Dee dressed as Dedede

Mike: Feeling frisky [turns in2 a cat]  
Blooberri: Marty McFly is where it's at

Grenade: Grim Reaper

Pseudonym: Captain America

Riley: Sonic, Sonic, he's on be run

Jp: Shulk is the one, I'm really feeling it  
Joe: I'm gonna be Link  
Rydli: I'm gonna be Marth  
Robot: On this night, R.O.B. reigns  
Berserker: Samus is the one I obtained  
Isaac: The 10th doctor is who I picked  
Ziggy: Everyone hail to the Loli King now

This is Thanksgiving, this is Thanksgivng  
Thanksgiving! Danksgiving! Thankgiving! Thanksgiving!

DryBones: It's almost done, we saved the best for last  
Because I am dressed, as Steve from MineCraft

All: La, la, la, la-la la, la, la, la-la la, la, la, la-la la, la-la la, Wheeeee"  
[le big finish]

The doors to the mansion closed as all of the haikuers gathered inside.

The Troll Slaiyers stuck together as they walked down a hallway together.

"Well this should be easy. Just sit around for the night. How hard can it be!" Kirby said optimistically.  
"So this is exactly like the Dubai challenge. Alright." Marrowksy said.

Grenade bumped into Gluvr.

"Oh, sorry about that." Grenade apologize.  
"Oh, it's ok! Hey I like your Grim Reaper costume" Kirby smiled.  
"Thanks, it reminds me of the inevitability of death" Grenade said.  
"Haha, nice one" Kirby said.  
"Yeah...so you, uh, like propane?" Grenade asked.  
"I LOVE propane" Kirby said.

Grenade stopped looking at Kirby and turned his direction to his front, all of the haikuers had disappeared.

"That's weird...everyone must have went on" Grenade said.

Grenade looked around, there were several doors on each side of the hall. He tried to think of which one everyone went in, before hearing a scream. He turned around.

"I left my charger on the plane" Kirby said.  
"Oh, k. Well we should start looking for the others" Grenade suggested. He opened one of the doors and Kirby followed him in. The door shut itself.

A flashlight was taped to the wall next to the door for them to grab. Grenade turned it on and waved it around the room.

"Not this room I guess" Grenade said.

Grenade turned around and tries opening the door, but It was locked. He tugged hard, trying to open it.  
Kirby turned around as whispers crept on them, getting louder. Grenade pulled harder and harder on the door, the flashlight's glass shattered and the room went pitch black.

"Grenade, it's push not pull" Kirby said, knocking him down and pushing the door open.

They walked out and back into the hall.

Meanwhile, the rest of the Troll Slaiyers were in a library.

"Yo Pantz. Check this out" Cloud said, attempting to do a flip and falling flat on his face.

Element and Moogle were sitting at a table conversing.

"Huh. So. Get this. Terrance Gore just stole not one, but two bases." Moogle said.  
"Wow" Element said.  
"Huh. Gotta go fast" Moogle joked.  
"Haha..." Element laughed.  
"Whoa. So, Wade Davis, just got three strikeouts. He ended his streak with a slick curveball" Moogle told Element.  
"Did he now? Nice arm, David" Element said.

Element's phone vibrated. He took his phone out of his pocket and checked the notification, it was for .

"You use the app now?" Moogle asked.  
"Without a proper PC to use I have to rely on just my phone, ok. It helps me get notified on questions faster. Now let's see what it is I got." Element said, pulling up .

"Haikik is shit" the question read.

"Oh boy, anon's back with, you guessed it, MORE Haikik questions. I just can't get a break" Element said.

Another question appeared.

"Don't judge Haikik unless you've been there" it read.

"Holy shit when will they understand. I WAS there for a brief period before most of the current members joined, I know what it's like there. I'm just going to ask them not to send me these type of questions anymore" Element said, typing on his phone.

More questions appeared.

"Add stars if you like Justin Bieber"  
"Add stars if you don't like Justin Bieber"  
"Is anime real?"

"This site fucking sucks." Element said.  
"Then why do you still go on it?" Moogle asked.  
"Well I'm bored" Element said.  
"Your page sucks anyways, nobody likes it" Cloud said.  
"I like Element's blog" DryBones said as he was shot in the back of his head from a shotgun.

Team Jacob was waking down a hallway. Lukeguy checked his phone.

"Element's making dumb post on ask again" Luke said.  
"What did he say?" Alice asked.  
"He's agreeing with the posts against Haikik and for the ones that make a good point supporting Haikik he tried to change the subject by asking to stop getting questions about it" Luke explained.  
"Wow! Classic Elly" Alice said.

Green goo skidded down the wall. Berserker examined it and eagerly took pictures of it.

[Berserker in le confession toilet]  
"I love supernatural things like this, this place is awesome. You know when I was younger I saw a UFO, and supposedly a UFO was once outside my house, so cool"  
[le end]

"Nice pics Berk" Riley blushed.

"Thanks" Berserker said.

Mike walked up.

"r u in2 iCarly rp?" Mike asked.  
"THIS IS YOU" Berserker shouted, pointing at the goo on the wall.  
"Wait what the heck, why is there goo on the wall that we're just looking at casually?" Alice asked.

Alice and Luke walked closer to them and once they got to Berserker they all hissed at each other.

[Alice in le confession toilet]  
"FUCK BERK! On haiku he just posts casual things like training Pokémon or some weird shit about aliens, but if you've ever been in a group chat with him, the True Freak would be revealed..."  
[le end]

"Hey Mike, want to go check out some other rooms with me" Berserker asked.  
"Don't do it, Mike." Alice said.  
"But me and Berk have always been besties...sorry guys, I can't just leave him..." Mike said.

Berk smiled as Mike joined him and they both walked away, Alice and Luke held displeased looks.

Alice checked her .

"Where is Carz?" it read.

"Dreck question" Alice said.

"Where is Carz?" Element asked.  
"What does that even mean. He's here with us" Element said.  
"Wait, actually where is Carz. He's not here anymore" Moogle said.

They looked around and Carz was nowhere to be seen.

"He's probably just shouting about Minions somewhere" Element said.

Another question appeared on Element's screen.

"Mr. Moogle is next" it read.

Element looked at Moogle.

"Wot"

The lights went out. It was pitch black black for a few seconds before the lights went back on. Moogle was gone.

"Uh, what? Hey, Moogle? Where'd you go?" Element asked.

The other Troll Slaiyers got closer to Element.

"What's going on?" Marrowsky asked.

Team Jacob was walking through a ball room. The thunder boomed outside as it rained harshly.

"This is just like the time Amber pushed a shopping cart into a fat lady and laughed at her" J said.

The door behind them opened and a body fell on the floor. Everyone turned around to see Stickboy crawl towards them.

"Damn, was hoping he died" Nicholas said.  
"How did you survive a fall from the plane?" Reu asked.  
"It's ok, you see you can fall from any height and survive as long as you land in a wheelbarrow full of hay" Stickboy explained.  
"Wow, that's heavy doc." Bloo said.

A question appeared on Alice's screen.

"Blooberri is gone?" It read.

The door behind Stickboy slammed shit. The window flew open and the lights began to flicker. The door ahead of the team flew open and a beast leapt in. Everyone started backing up as it snarled. It was a werewolf.

"A werewolf, huh. That's, a, that's a pretty spooky, eh, heh guys a werewolf, that's a pretty spooky right?" Isaac asked.  
"Not really. A lot of the people in this castle would probably fap to it" Nicholas said.

The werewolf pounced on Blooberri and started to tear at her neck.

Everyone ran out of the ballroom, flying last Stickboy with terrified expressions, except for Lukeguy the badass who doesn't get scared and kept a straight face.  
They all ran down the hall as the lights flickered some more.

"Man. I'm so thankful for winning the genetic lottery" Rydli said.  
"Guys. Where the hell is Moogle? My FRIEND MOOGLE? And why didn't anyone make a joke about him fucking the horses on the horse carriage? You missed a great opportunity" Element said.  
"And Carz" Pseudonym said.  
"Like I said, Moogle" Element said.  
"Kirby and Grenade aren't here either." Marrowksy said.  
"Like I said, Moogle" Element said.

Team Jacob busted into the library, and all of the Slaiyers stood out of their seats as all of the haikuers were reunited.

"Oh. Come here often?" Pseudonym asked.  
"Something happened to Blooberri, right after we got these weird questions" Gingerale explained.  
"Same for us with Moogle" Element said.  
"Ok good so only irrelevant people were caught" Nicholas said.

Another message appeared on Element's screen.

"Haikik and Haiku should merge"

"Holy shit who sends these stupid questions?" Element asked.  
"Eh, whatever. We may never know. It doesn't matter" Cloud said.  
"You know what, no, I do care. Don't you guys ever get tired of this? This anon has been sending us stupid questions for over a year now, don't you guys care about finding out who he or she is? I mean, if we all work together we might be able to solve this once and for all. We can find out who's sending all these dumb Haikik Vs Haiskype questions, the annual Ridley for Smash questions, and now the one terrorizing us. I know we usually don't give a shit enough to put in the effort for things like this, but I think the time has finally come. Let's crack down on this and put an end to this anon" Element suggested.  
"Hmm. No." Cloud said.  
"You know what? I'm down. If we all work together we can solve this once and for all" Alice said.  
"You're all idiotic kids I won't be participating in this" Luke said.  
"I'm with Luke" Riley said sternly.  
"What the heck, I'll help" Nicholas said.

The haikuers put their hands together to signify their team up.

"Let's do this" Other said.

The camera zoomed outwards, bats swarmed away from the castle as the lightning struck louder, and the camera panned towards the full moon.

Madorky let out a loud fart.

"Really Madorky?" Jp asked.  
"Sorry I wasn't expecting it to be loud" Alice apologized.

Lemon drew a line on a piece of paper.

"Alright, everybody's name is on this paper. DryBones, Carz, Oogly Moogly, and Blooberri are the ones who disappeared, or left for dead" Lemon said.  
"Nice vidya reference...I got that reference...left for dead..." Isaac said.  
"Right. So, I crossed their names off. Grenade, Gluvr, Berk and Mike were separated but that doesn't mean they're gone yet" Lemon said, drawing a question mark next to their names.  
"You can say the same for Moogle and Carz, we haven't actually seen them get thrown out of the manor or something" Jp argued.  
"Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhh nooooooooo, so yeah. How should we go about finding this anon?" Lemon asked.  
"Let's split up and look for clues" Cloud suggested.  
"Actually if you've seen any of the Countless Terrible horror movies you would know that's the thing all the idiots who end up dying do. So I advise we don't do that." Luke said.  
"Hey bitch I've seen every episode of every iteration of Scooby Doo and not once has this plan ever failed them. Who are you going to believe guys, Cloud Strife or a naked Mexican, who is probably an illegal immigrant?" Cloud asked everyone.  
"Yeah Puke, as long as we all split into groups and not divide individually what's the worst that can happen?" Ziggy asked.  
"The groups are tampered with and split up by supernatural activity" Luke said.  
"Hmmm, no. This is a Scooby Doo thing not a Supernatural thing" Cloud said.  
"Now what's one way we can expose the anon?" Lemon asked.  
"What if we all block a different person. If we all chip in we'll see who stops getting the mass questions, and the person they blocked must have been the one who asked" Alice suggested.  
"I'm afraid that won't work, because it requires taking 15 seconds to think of someone to block and then blocking that person, and most of us just simply don't have that kind of energy" Pseudonym said.  
"Hm. True." Alice nodded.  
"The anon is in this mansion, since he knew about the disappearances. Let's just split up and perhaps look for-" Element started.  
"F-f-f-for what? What? What was that Element? Look for what? Look for clues? Yeah. I said that idea first." Cloud said.

The haikuers split into four groups,. The first group was GingeraleDragon, Nicholas, Isaac, J, Stickboy, Reu, and StarForce.  
The second group was Lukeguy, Robot, Madorky, Sam, Lemon, and Riley.  
The third group was Rydli, Pseudonym, Element, Marrowsky, Shinxy.  
Finally, the fourth group was Jp, Ziggy, Cloud, Joe, and Pantz. The different groups split up and walked through different doors.

"Nice of the group to invite us over for a picnic, eh Stickboy?" Reu asked.

Stickboy didn't respond, keeping his eyes on the floor as they trotted along.

[Reu in le confession toilet]  
Reu's ass is sucked into the vacuum toilet.  
"Stickboy's been pretty down since falling 20,000 feet from the sky, surviving, and missing his amiibo. I should cheer him up"  
[le end]

"Hey Stick, you know what would cheer you up? How about we look up some other amiibo we can get? Look at this, there's gonna be a new Mega Man amiibo that's gold" Reu said, showing him a picture from his phone.  
"What makes it different from other Mega Man amiibo?" Isaac asked.  
"Nothing it's just gold" Reu said.  
"That's pretty retar-I mean, stupid." Nicholas said.  
"So guys, I was thinking. 10 stars on a post and I cum on one of my amiibo" Gingerale said.  
"Sounds disgusting" Stickboy said.  
"Shut up Stickboy. Sounds like a Shinxy act" Nicholas said.  
"Well haiku's dead there's no way I'm actually going to get 10 individual stars. It'll just be for a laugh" Gingerale said.  
"Well maybe you-"  
"Stickboy, please, just shut up." Nicholas said.

Isaac was tugging on Gingerale's shirt, trying to inform him, but everyone was talking over him.

"Uh, guys" Isaac tried to say.  
"So I was browsing for scythes on and I found one that would look great with me" J said.  
"Wow J. We don't care." Gingerale said.  
"I-" Isaac tried to say.  
"This reminds me of the time Tommy and I went to an abandoned warehouse with Amber and Ashley and when we got there Tommy and Ashley fucked on the floor while me and Amber watched" J said.  
"J we're trying to have a meaningful discussion about releasing on amiibo over here" Nicholas said.  
"Guys!" Isaac yelled.  
"So you guys know about that anime Parasite right?" J asked.  
"Is anime real? Reu asked.  
"GUYS!" Isaac screamed.

They all turned around to see a dark cloud nearing them.

"I'LL SAVE YOU GUYS!" Isaac shouted, diving in front of them all and landing on the floor.  
"That was unnecessary but ok" Nicholas said.

They started backing up as the shadow consumed Isaac. They all ran down the hall and the shadow of smoke started moving faster down the hall. Reu looked up and saw a string dangling from the wall.

"Look, it must lead to the attic. Come on!" Reu said, leaping up and grabbing. A window above the sting flew open and a ladder plopped down, slowly descending. The ladder hung in midair. Reu grabbed onto it and climbed up. StarForce jumped up and grabbed onto the latter, climbing up. J jumped up next. Then Nicholas, then Stickboy. Gingerale ran right past the latter, forgetting to jump.

"Dang it I forgot to jump" Gingerale said as he ran straight into a wall.

Reu pulled the latter back up and closed it, leaving them in the attic.  
The puff of smoke approached Gingerale, who was on his back. He got up and opened the door in front of him, closing it immediately as he entered the next room.

Reu, Stickboy, J, Nicholas, and StarForce sat in the dark attic, using their phones for flashlights.

"Hey Stickboy, you know what would be cool? Stockpiling on Animal Crossing amiibo and then selling them for cash? That sound appealing?" Reu asked.  
"Not really" Stickboy sighed.  
"That Wii Fit Trainer man, I felt so accomplished when I got her...a lot of people say I'm stupid for collecting amiibo but I think it's really cool, seeing all my favorite characters lined up like they would in the game. And then there's her...oh why did she have to become a unicorn? This whole amiibo thing was just stupid" Stickboy said angrily, kicking a box, which caused a TV on top of the box to fall over and topple over him.  
"Wow Stickboy, that's such a tragic tale...so who wants to hear the story behind my Braixen getting sodomized by cheese pizza drawing?" Nicholas asked.  
"Hey there a voice called out. Wait I wasn't supposed to say that part" a voice called out.

J screamed in terror.

"No guys, it's just me, Admin." Admin said.

J screamed in terror.

"Stick, my man. You didn't participate in our ensemble song. You know what that means right? You gotta sing a solo" Admin said.  
"A solo? About what, sodomizing Braixen with cheese pizza?" Nicholas asked.  
"Just whatever. Sing what's in your heart" Admin revised.

Stickboy got up and thought about what to sing. He looked outside the attic window and watched the clouds, imagining them as his lovely Wii Fit Trainer.

[Song #14 - Lovely Wii Fit Trainer]

Stickboy:  
August 18th, a birthday I will soon not forget  
It felt like singing with her in a magical duet  
Without a minute to rest or a second to waste  
I left out of bed to run to my beautiful escape  
Onto the usual space, and I'm feelin' pretty sway  
Cause on the horizon is a shining light from a brand new figure in stock  
And I want it for my bday  
Why can't I go in and buy one normally  
I've tried to wait in line  
But my local retail likes to disagree with my heart  
Cause all I want to see is my favorite girl stretch adorably  
Missin' those times when we got fired  
Up doing exercise from jackknifes to push-ups  
And now that you're weighing in, you're a must have dream that I have to pickup

-  
Stickboy goes frolicking in the forest, running in slow motion towards his Wii Fit Trainer amiibo

Nicholas, J, StarForce, and Reu:  
Beautiful Wii Fit Trainer  
The way that you pose is so captivating  
Villager, he can sit down  
Cause I've been waitin' for the day that you arrive  
So that I could touch ya  
Just so I could touch ya  
Just so I could touch ya  
Just so I could touch ya  
My lovely Wii Fit Trainer

-  
Stickboy and the Wii Fit Trainer amiibo run in circles together holding hands

Stickboy:  
Oh, yeah, you had me worried  
Your rarity was so disturbing  
Cause I thought you wouldn't complete my amiibo wave 1 collection  
I spent three time the price at retail  
But there is more to what I have to say  
I'm attracted today, because I spent all that for you  
The transaction went in and later on my shipment had arrived  
I told all my friend and said "Check this" and they said "Nice"  
What I never lost was hope because it's hard to buy them all  
That's why I had to catch my breath from the second moment I saw ya, the

-  
Stickboy sticks his amiibo in his mouth and closes his eyes a she shoves it deeper in

Nicholas, J, StarForce, and Reu:  
Beautiful Wii Fit Trainer  
The way that you pose is so captivating  
Villager, he can sit down  
Cause I've been waitin' for the day that you arrive  
So that I could touch ya  
Just so I could touch ya  
Just so I could touch ya  
Just so I could touch ya  
My lovely Wii Fit Trainer  
[le big finish]

"Alright guys. We need to get Stickboy laid. Or this could go on forever." Nicholas deemed.  
"Maybe I can help" StarForce suggested.  
"StarForce nobody wants to jump aboard your furry dating service" Nicholas said.

[StarForce in le confession toilet]  
"Gee golly, I don't understand why Nicholas is so against my idea. e621harmony could change people's lives"  
[le end]

Jp, Ziggy, Cloud, Joe, and Pantz were in a dark, rusty room full of coffins.

"So, Joe. How's it going?" Jp asked.  
"Aids" Joe said.  
"Cool, cool. So, like, you know what else would be cool? If we formed a..." Jp started, letting Joe finish the sentence.  
"Mexican mariachi band? Sure" Joe said.  
"Uh, what?" Jp asked.

"Nice coffin" Ziggy said, feeling the surface.  
"I'm going to put Cloud in here after I kick his ass in Smash" Ziggy said.  
"Man these are so cool looking. I wouldn't mind being buried in one of these" Pantz admired.  
"I'm going to put Cloud in here after I kick his ass in Smash"  
"Ok bitch, say that after I three stock you" Cloud said.  
"What. Why did you just repeat what Ziggy said?" Pantz asked.  
"Well because there was some dialogue between Ziggy's comment and my response so I had to make it clear it was directed toward that comment" Cloud said.  
"Say that to my face fagger" Ziggy said.  
"Well because there was some dialogue between Ziggy's comment and my response so I had to make it clear it was directed toward that comment" Cloud said.  
"No the thing before that" Ziggy said.  
"What. Why did you just repeat what Ziggy said?" Pantz asked.  
"No, I mean. Ugh just SCREW YOU CLOUD" Ziggy yelled, pushing Cloud forward, he bumped Pantz and the two fell into the coffin, it shut tight.  
"Oh. Well time to go jack off to anime" Ziggy said walking away.

The coffin shook as Cloud and Pantz were locked inside.

The doorknob started wiggling. Jp and Joe looked around to find somewhere to hide. They both leaped into two different coffins as the person entered the room. But no one was there but a floating pair of glasses.

"Wtf are you?" Ziggy asked.  
"I'm the Invisible Man" Invisible Man said.  
"What do you do?" Ziggy asked.  
"Well...I'm invisible" Invisible Man explained.  
"That's not very scary" Ziggy said.

There was a long pause before the Invisible Man punched Ziggy in the face, knocking him down.

Cloud laid on top of Pantz inside the coffin.

"So." Pantz said.

Cloud's boner poked Pantz.

"What's that?" Pantz asked.  
"Nothing, I just, we need to get outta here" Cloud said, recklessly banging his body against the inside of the coffin.

Joe slid her coffin's top off, leaping out.

"Well that's going on my blog. Hey Jp what was it that you wanted to ask me?" Joe asked.

Jp started to remove the coffin top but heard a strange noise and ceased moving it.

"What the heckaroni is that?" Joe asked, Cloud, Pantz, and Jp couldn't see what she was talking about because they were inside the coffins and therefore their vision was hidden from the coffin lid keeping them in the coffin which would not allow them to see the event in which Joe was describing.

"Hey! Ahhhhhh!" Joe said.

Cloud, Pantz, and Jp heard a loud crash and Joe's voice disappeared. Cloud stopped humping Pantz as they listened closely. Slow footsteps crept near them.

"Cloud. What is that?" Pantz whispered.  
"Do I look like a psychic to you Pantz? Do I? I'm not capable of living up to expectations like that" Cloud whispered back.

The footsteps got closer to Cloud and Pantz' coffin. Cloud started to sweat, pouring on Pantz and making her feel grossed out. Pantz closed her eyes in fear as something picked at their coffin.

"Wait! Over here" Jp yelled, jumping out of her coffin.

The being turned towards Jp, who gasped.

"Holy cheddar balls, it's you!" Jp said.

Jp threw a manga she always keeps on her pickets at it, distracting it for a moment as Jp darted for the door.

"Cloud you're really sweaty. Like, geez, this is a lot of sweat" Pantz whispered.

[Cloud in le confession toilet]  
"Yeah, sweat."  
[le end]

Cloud banged his body against the coffin once more and the wooden floor broke, the coffin containing the two dropped below the floor. The coffin banged against the tight walls and flipped numerous times, eventually crashing on the below floor and smashing open, Cloud and Pantz fell out. The ground and walls were all cobble. Some chains hung from the walls. Pantz dusted herself off and picked up Cloud's phone, handing it to him.

"Hey, Cloud, you dropped your phone. Hey, is that, Palutena?" Pantz asked.  
"G-give me that!" Cloud said, swiping the phone from her.

The small light shining down from the hole they created began to close up as they heard footsteps get closer.

"Come on we have to go" Cloud said, grabbing Pantz's hand and running through the room in search of an exit.

Gingerale slowly walked through the dark room he entered.

[Gingerale in le confession toilet]  
"Man this castle sure does have a lot of dark empty rooms"  
[le end]

The thunder cackled and Gingerale turned towards a window, once he turned his gaze to its original direction he was caught off guard by Moogle's presence.

"Oh shit, Moogle. My man! It's been so long. Uh, how's it going dude?" Gingerale asked.  
"Hey kupo. It's been pretty alright. You know, aside from losing to you in the most unrealistic battle ever" Moogle said.

"So anyway, I could have sworn someone said you disappeared or something. But then again the person giving the rundown was from Haikik so I wasn't really paying attention. We're on a mystery hunt to find the anon who's always sending shitty questions, wanna pair up?" Gingerale asked.  
"Sure. Sounds like we're going to have a good time." Moogle smiled, and the two started walking away.

Element, Shinxy, Pseudonym, Marrowsky, and Rydli were in the kitchen.

"So anyone else think these costumes are pretty much pointless outside that one mention in the song?" Marrowsky asked.  
"Of course" Element said.  
"Eh" Shinxy said.

Rydli was checking himself out in his mirror.

"Honestly I only chose Marth because it was the closest I could get to being Lucina without being transgender" Rydli said.

Some waffles plopped out of the toaster and Marrowsky grabbed them.

"Nice Flipnote reference" Element said.  
"Is it illegal to mention waffles?" Marrowsky asked.  
"Dude it's the middle of the night you shouldn't be eating breakfast" Element said.  
"It's the most important mean of the day" Marrowksy informed.

Marrowsky made a 50 decker sandwich and ate it.  
Everyone was startled by the noise of some falling pans.

"My nigger face paint is falling off ;-;" Shinxy said.  
"Whoa Shinxy you're getting better at forming sentences." Pseudo complimented.  
"I'll check the noise." Rydli said confidently, strutting through the room as the others watched his ass.  
" /Element921" Element reminded everyone.

Rydli walked back.

"So. There is a monster. And he's coming this way." Rydli said calmly, walking past the group and out of the room.

A mummy slowly walked towards the four.  
Marrowsky struck it in the face with a frying pan and it fell on its back.

"That mummy shuld give me cummies :" Shinxy said.

The mummy's body started twitching on the ground. The wraps began to slowly unravel themselves and its body cracked open, a large black tarantula lager than them all started to crawl out. They all backed up as it freed its eight legs and spit out some web. It stated down the haikuers.

"Hold on I might be able to get rid of this" Element said.  
"Huh? How?" Pseudo asked.  
"Let's just say I play a lot of Minecraft mods" Element explained.

Before Element could do anything the spider spit out some web at Element and knocked him back 5000 feet.

"New plan. We run!" Pseudo said.

Pseudonym and Marrowsky ran from the spider, Shinxy slowly walked.

"Shinxy, you gotta run too!" Marrowsky encouraged.  
"Eh" Shinxy said as he slowly walked, the spider getting closer to him.  
"Shinxy! It's going to get you!" Marrowkys warned.  
"Eh, too much work" Shinxy said as the spider leaped on top of him.

Berserker was pushing through piles of books.

"Well have you tried being nice to Alice?" Mike asked.  
"Look Mike I don't even want to be associated with them. Arguing over how I act, banning me over the stupidest and most personal problems, they really are stupid. Also Madorky complained that she can't be on haiku just because she is not looked at as one of the best users...? Not like anything stopped her either but hey on Haikik she acts just as they would on haiku except she actually COULD stop people. And yes Mike I have been nice to her even when she first started all that sjw stuff and after all this she could die tbh." Berserker explained.  
"o" Moke said.  
"But that doesn't matter. Let's just check out some of this cool-" Berserker stared, but upon grabbing a book from a bookcase the bookcase swung around and Berserker was flown into a different room.  
"Swastikal!" Mike said, going to grab a book, but the door opened  
"Mike? Mike!" Alice said.

Lukeguy, Robot, Madorky, Sam, Lemon, and Riley walked into the room.

"O, heyguys! Berk just told me this weird thing. Arguing over how I act, banning me over the stupidest and most personal problems, they really are stupid. Also Madorky complained that she can't be on haiku just because she is not looked at as one of the best users...? Not like anything stopped her either but hey on Haikik she acts just as they would on haiku except she actually COULD stop people. And yes Mike I have been nice to her even when she first started all that sjw stuff and after all this she could die tbh." Mike said.  
"Arguing over how I act, banning me over the stupidest and most personal problems, they really are stupid. Also Madorky complained that she can't be on haiku just because she is not looked at as one of the best users...? Not like anything stopped her either but hey on Haikik she acts just as they would on haiku except she actually COULD stop people. And yes Mike I have been nice to her even when she first started all that sjw stuff and after all this she could die tbh." Alice repeated.  
Arguing over how I act, banning me over the stupidest and most personal problems, they really are stupid. Also Madorky complained that she can't be on haiku just because she is not looked at as one of the best users...? Not like anything stopped her either but hey on Haikik she acts just as they would on haiku except she actually COULD stop people. And yes Mike I have been nice to her even when she first started all that sjw stuff and after all this she could die tbh." Luke repeated.  
"Kid needs therapy." Luke said.  
"Haha, nice one Luke. I agree." Riley said.

[Riley in le confession toilet]  
"Sorry Berk...I was trying to look cool in front of Luke"  
[le end]

"Oh my god Berk is such a freak" Alice said.  
"Good post Madorky" Luke complimented.  
"Thanks" Alice said, and the two exchanged a high five.  
"Wait, maybe I shouldn't have sent that...don't let Berk know I told you guys that" Mike said.  
"None of us like Berk why would we speak to him" Alice said.  
"Tru" Luke said.  
"Well I like him!" Mike said nervously.  
"I...agree with Luke. Haha I'm so the Ross of the group" Riley said.  
"What?" Robot asked.  
"Oh yeah because I binge watched the entire series of Friends recently so it's been stuck in my head" Riley explained.  
"Save it for the next episode Riley" Alice said as the group walked out of the room laughing, except for Lukeguy who doesn't feel happiness.

Berserker slowly rotated the bookcase back in place as he stepped back into the room, having heard the entire conversation.

"What the, OMG guys I think I caught the anon!" Alice said excitedly.  
"Whoa really? How?" Lemon asked.  
"I blocked Ret and everyone else got this question except for me" Alice said, showing Lemon her phone.  
"Sweet, so Ret it i-wait a minute. You do realize you told everyone on your previous question to stop sending you stupid questions about haiku drama right?" Lemon asked.  
"Yeah, so." Alice said.  
"How do you know they weren't just adhering to your request and didn't send you the question because of that" Lemon said.  
"Lemon, you fool. People on the Internet don't respect other people's requests. That isn't a possibility" Alice said.  
"Lemon. Your ass. Nice." Riley said.  
"Hey, bro...I'm the only one who compliments Lemon's ass round these parts...now why don't you make like a tree and BEAT IT!" Sam said, pushing Riley against the wall.

"Banana..." a voice whispered.

The group looked around but couldn't find out who said it.

"Banana..." It said again.

"Minions!?" Alice asked.  
"Tis not scary at all" Luke said.

A pair of hands lurched through the wall and grabbed ahold of Lukeguy. They covered his mouth as they sucked him in.

"Omq!" Mike said.

[Luke in le confession toilet]  
"The hands touched me while I was naked..."  
[le end]

"Ahhh!" Robot screamed, running down the hall.

The other followed suit but their running was halted by the carpet, which was being pulled in the opposite direction.

"Banana..." it whispered again.

More hands started to peel out of the walls. Mike pushed Sam down, who rolled across the carpet. A disembodied figure picked Sam up and started eating him. The carpet stopped moving and the rest of the group escaped at the end of the hall.

"So at first I was doing right handed, but then I disorders left handed allows me to browse porn while I jack, so that was also nice" Gingerale said.  
"Wow" Moogle said.

Gingerale's phone started ringing as Skype was calling. Gingerale answered it.  
Very loud noise screamed out of Gingerale's phone as the other end sounded like static scraping against a windshield.

"Hey." J said.

"J what the fuck is it this time. I can't waste my battery on a call with you" Gingerale said.

"So Hope's bf Ryan kissed his fingers then smeared them on my mouth." J said.

"Are you outside? J what are you doing outside?" Gingerale asked.

"It looked nice out so I'm sitting on the roof" J explained.

"It's pouring out" Gingerale said.

"J give me that. Hey, Gingerale? It's me, Nicholas." Nicholas said.

"Hold on, prove it. What's something only Nicholas would say?" Gingerale asked.

"Uh. I'm Nicholas" Nicholas said.

"Alright you checked out. So what's up?" Gingerale asked.

"Well I, hey Stickboy shut up please, I'm on a call. Sorry Stickboy's being a problem child." Nicholas said.  
"What's going on? Has he seen my Wii Fit Trainer amiibo?" Stickboy asked.  
"Stickboy just shut up for a few minutes while I talk to Gingerale" Nicholas said.  
"So, we were-"  
"Why don't you just text Gingerale instead so it-"  
"STICKBOY! STICKBOOOOOY JUST SHUT THE FRICKING FRICK UP WHILE I TALK TO GINGERALE! SHUT THE FRICK UUUUUP!" Nicholas screamed.  
"Whoa Nicholas. Hahaha. Being on a Skype call in a horror scenario? Sounds like things could go a little kooky like that movie Unfriended, if you know what I mean" J chuckled.  
"J stop being a problem child that was just a dumb movie noting like that is-"

Nicholas screamed as he stuck his hand into a blender for no reason.

"Jesus Christ" J said.  
"Don't say the lord's name in vain" Nicholas said.  
"Maybe we can get to Gingerale if we sneak out on the roof and climb over toward him" J suggested.  
"Or we could see if the coast is clear downstairs" Reu said.  
"I like my idea better, it's more adventurous" J said as he jumped out of the window.  
"Ok let's leave before he comes back" Nicholas said as the group opened the door and stepped back down.

Gingerale closed the call.

"What was even the point of that?" Gingerale asked.

The lights flickered and as they turned from dark to light Ziggy appeared.

"Oh, this guy. Here to make some anime joke like J would?" Gingerale asked.  
"What is anime?" Ziggy asked.  
"Weeb trash, but whatever. I don't care if you like anime as long as you aren't...J about it" Gingerale said, causally walking by Ziggy.  
"Lol is anime real?" Ziggy asked.  
"What?" Gingerale asked.  
"You guys play Undertale?" Ziggy asked.  
"I'd rather not be involved with that cancerous fanbase. Right Moogle?" Gingerale said.  
"Oh yeah dude. The endings are really great, like, nothing I've ever seen before. And the characters are so well written too, they exceeded the expectations I had from what the fan art made it out to be" Moogle said.  
"Haha how about that Undyne, amirite?" Ziggy asked.  
"Is anime real?" Moogle asked.  
"Is anime real!" Ziggy asked.  
"Guys let's save this for when you're back with your team and not with me so my boned doesn't go flaccid and I can masturbate" Gingerale said.

Gingerale kept walking but stopped when he noticed Ziggy and Moogle stood still.

"Ok stay if you want I don't care" Gingerale said.

"Is anime real?" Ziggy asked.  
"Is anime real?" Moogle asked.  
"Is anime real" they asked together in a distorted voice, turning their head 180 degrees towards Gingerale, their eyes turned red.  
"Oh" Gingerale said.  
"Come play Undertale with us Gingerale" they said, slowly walking towards him.  
"No. Moogle come on, snap out of it bro. It's just a fad, you gotta be joking right?" Gingerale asked.  
"Anime's real, right?" Moogle asked.  
"You're going to have a bad time" Ziggy said.

Gingerale started running away from them.

"Shut up! Shut up!" Gingerale shouted back.

Grenade and Kirby were walking casually down some stairs. A large amount of vapor was at the bottom of the steps.

"Wow, has someone been vaping?" Grenade asked.  
"What? What vape?" Kirby asked.  
"The smoke. When someone inhales and exhales vapor. How have you not heard of this?" Grenade asked.  
"Oooooh, I thought vaping was like listening to Vaporwave. I've never seen someone vape before and I didn't want to ask what it meant and look stupid" Kirby explained.

Jp ran up to Grenade and Kirby from behind.

"Guys, where have you been?" Jp asked.  
"You know, just sticking around in the shadows where no one pays attention to, like usual" Grenade said.  
"Well, I think I figured out the one behind all of this" Jp said.  
"Behind what? Vaping? I thought it was Toriel" Kirby said.

On the ground floor the doors opened as StarForce, Nicholas, Reu, and Stickboy walked in.

"Maybe I left her in here?" Stickboy asked.  
"Give it up Stickboy" Nicholas said.  
"Well, I'm just saying..." Stickboy said.  
"Stickboy she fell out of the plane why would she just be laying around in some random room" Nicholas asked.

Stickboy sighed, then noticed Jp and the others. Get it, because Grenade is one of the other guys and Kirby's gender is classified as other on forms.

"Hey look, Grenade, Jp, and Kirby" Reu said.  
"That's a sentence I would never say excitedly" Nicholas said.  
"You know what, shut up Nicholas" Reu said angrily.  
"I'm just gonna go on ahead" Stickbly sighed, looking at the ground.  
"Whoa, whoa! Buddy, buddy! Number one rule in horror movies, never go alone" StarForce said.  
"I don't care" Stickboy said.  
"Go ahead Stickboy, mess up and make us lose so I can vote you off and never have to see your smelly face again" Nicholas said.

Stickboy just walked past the group and entered the door in front of them.

"This place has a lot of different doors" StaForce said.  
"It's a castle" Reu said.  
"Also we need them for a Scooby Doo montage" Grenade said.

Jp watched Stickboy left and frowned.

"Hey, what's wrong?" Kirby asked.  
"Nothing, I just, hope Stickboy feels better..." Jp said.  
"Wait a minute...a boy and a girl caring about each other on a show...you like him don't you!" Kirby asked with an exclamation mark.  
"What? No. He just looks like he's having a bad day..." Jp said.  
"Jp if you like him, you gotta tell him.! Don't hide your feelings or you might run out of time" Kibey said.

Grenade looked down at his dick.

"Hey Jp, I know what you're getting for Christmas" Reu said.  
"Uh, ok. What does that have to do with anything?" Jp asked.

The lights started flickering and the group moved closer to each other. The tables started to slowly lift into the air as lamps shook wildly. The trophy animal heads started spewing goo out of their eyes.

"Ok cool. Later dorks" Grenade said, heading towards the door. He tried opening it but it was locked.  
"Uh oh" Kirby said.

StarForce, Nicholas, Reu, Jp, Grenade, and Kirby started floating in the air.

"Reu lets activate Reuniclas and get ourselves out of this jam" Nicholas suggested.  
"I'm sorry, Reu doesn't want to be fused with right now, please try again later" Reu said with his arms crossed.  
"Reu my dude you're about to go from 31 to 30 fans" Nicholas warned.  
"You're not even one of my fans" Reu complained.  
"Gosh darn it Reu just take my hand and fuse with me" Nicholas said, holding his arm out.  
"I can't, we can only do it when we're both content with each other" Reu said.  
"Ok you're just making this up" Nicholas said.

The haikuers were thrown against the wall. Some white stuff fell out of StarForce's pants.

"Really bro now's not the time, save the Goodra X Latias action for when we get back on the plane" Nicholas said.  
"It's not me! It's ectoplasm" StarForce defended.  
"More like rektoplasm" Grenads said.

Grenade was thrown harder against the wall.

"What are these, ghosts? Jp asked.  
"Ghost are real!?" Kirby gasped.  
"Well we saw ghost Pokémon the other day so obviously" Reu said.  
"I'll show you honkies" Grenade said, throwing a fist in the air.

Grenade's body was thrown upwards at a chandelier, he fell to the ground and the chandelier came crashing down on top of him. The other haikuers were released from their grasp and fell to the ground.

"They're focusing on Grenade, we can use this time to escape" Reu said.  
"Hey let's just shout out our actions for our enemies to hear" Nicholas said.

Nicholas, Reu, StarForce, Jp, and Kirby ran for the door.

"Hey wait, do you think we can jump into the paintings like in SUPER MARIO 64!?" Kirby asked, jumping at a painting and knocking them-self out.

"ORA ORA ORA" Reu shouted as two statues of knights blocked their path.  
"Now listen here pal, if you think you can stand in the way of my friends then you have another thing co-"

The knight bonked its sword off StarForcd's head, knocking him out.  
Reu, Nicholas, and Jp snuck under the statues and arrived at the door.

"Now what? The door was locked, remember" Reu reminded them.

Jp opened the door.

"Looks like Grenade was pushing the door instead of pulling" she said as the three walked through the door and closed it behind them.

"Nice, we made it! And only three of us were sacrificed" Reu said.  
"Awesome, that's a better result than the last group I escaped from. Everything's coming up Jp" Jp said as she stepped forward, but crashed through the floor and fell downward to an unknown location.

"Well, looks like it's just us now" Nicholas said.

Reu didn't say anything.

"We should look for the rest of our team, and by our team I mean the half I like" Nicholas said.

Reu didn't say anything.

"Hello." Nicholas said.

Reu didn't say anything.

"Oh, what? Sorry, I ignore private messages a lot" Reu said.

Berserker was flipping through some pages in a book, his fist resting on his cheek.

"Who needs them anyways. Always complaining and insulting me for no reason. Great, now I'm talking to myself. The voices in my head are coming back..." Berserker said to himself.

Berserker clapped the book shut, which caused something to fall from the bookcase. He walked over and picked it up, but it wasn't a book.

"What...Jack and Jill?" he read the DVD case.

He looked for the spot the DVD fell from and found a stack of other DVDs.

"50 First Dates...The Wedding Singer...Just Go With It...Billy Madison...Good Daddy...these are all...wait a minute, if we're in Transylvania...does that mean..."  
"So I heard you didn't want me on your show." Somebody cut him off.

Element, Pseudonym, Marrowsky, and Rydli locked themselves in a closet.

"Why again did we hide in such a vulnerable place?" Pseudo asked.  
"It works in the movies." Marrowksy said.  
"Why am I so attractive?" Rydli asked as he combed his hair.  
"Focus, guys, focus. While we're in here we can devise a trap to catch the anon. But what? Element asked.  
"Or there could be several anons. Honestly some of them are most likely part of Haiku Drama" Rydli said.  
"Yeah that wasn't an answer to my question. Pseudo got anything?" Element asked.  
"Uh, I don't know. Well, actually. I've noticed that people on are unable to stop asking you questions, no matter what" Pseudo said.  
"And?" Element asked.  
"Like, even when is dead, you get questions. No matter what quality your answers are, you get questions. Even when you turned anonymous questions off, you STILL got questions. What if we used this. We could perhaps turn anon off and he when he shows up he will be exposed" Pseudonym suggested.  
"Pseudo that's got to be the most retarded idea I've ever heard in the past hour. Alright let's do it." Element said.  
"Or instead of trying to find out who the anon is we can choose not to care." Marrpwsku suggested.  
"Nobody likes a nihilist Marrowsky, come on guys" Rydli said, opening the closet door.

They walked out into a room full of skeletons.

"We should have plotted a bit more quietly." Marrowsky said.

The skeletons started to surround the four.

"What are you gonna do? Dance to the spooky scary skeletons song? I-I won't be afraid of you" Element said confidently as he backed up against a wall.  
"No. We have something else in mind" a skeleton said, whipping out a dick.  
"Oh my god." Element said.  
"RULE 34 SKELETONS!" Rydli screamed.

The four all ran through the crowd, trying to escape as the naughty skeletons jumped on them.

"Why is it blue and glowing?" Marrowksy asked.

Dozens of skeletons topped them all, and hey started crawling across the floor as they were whacked by many skelly penises.

"This doesn't even make sense" Element screamed as a skeleton pulled his pants off.

Rydli used his powerful fist to punch through a skeleton's chest, its body split into two and fell to the ground as spaghetti fell out. A skeleton ambushed Rydli from behind and started humping him.

"I've got a bone to pick with you! Hahaha, skull joke!" it said as its penis penetrated Rydli.

Just then, Mr. Moogle appeared at the door. He tripled his drum sticks around like nunchucks and whipped through all the skeletons, knocking them to pieces. He freed Marrowsky, who ran out of the room. As the skeleton dug deeper into Rydli, Moogle smecked its body off. His boney penis was still stuck in Rydli's anus as he ran out of the room. A massive pile of skeletons jumped on Element, but Moogle used his choir singing skills to scream a pitch loud bough to shatter its head. Moogle kicked the skeleton off of Element and held his hand out. Element grabbed on and Moogle pulled him up.

"There's too many now. You gotta go on without me" Pseudonym yelled as a skeleton pushed him against a wall and unzipped his pants.  
"Alright cool see ya" Moogle said as he and Element left the room.  
"Wait I was just trying to be modest. Guys? Guys!" Pseudo panicked as the smelliest got closer to him.

Marrowksy, Rydli, Element, and Moogle ran into an elevator. Some skeletons banged against the iron door as it started to descend. They all let out a breath of relief.

"Moogle, you're alright! I owe you one man" Element said, taking his fedora off to dust it off.  
"Man that was so...gay..." Element said.  
"Is alright, it's not gay unless you c*m" Moogle said  
"Oh, good, hahaha..." Element said, crossing his legs.

"Hey Marrowsky, do you think you can help me get this bone out of my butt?" Rydli asked.  
"No." Marrowsky replied.

"Don't sweat it man, just being a bro. But, there is something you could do for me" Moogle said.  
"What is it?" Element asked.  
"Well, I got you a gift. I'd like you to play it." Moogle smiled, his eyes started glowing.

"Hey Jp, Jp. J to the P." Cloud said.

Jp opened her eyes and found herself in a dark underground tunnel.

"What happened?" Jp asked.  
"You fell from upstairs and we found you lying here. I suggested leaving you and moving on, Pantz disagreed" Cloud said.

Jp got up and started walking with Cloud and Pantz.

"This place is so cool looking" Pantz admired as she looked around, some skeletons were hanging on the wall.  
"That reminds me, didn't we leave Luke's brother tied up back at Haikucon?" Cloud asked.  
"Omg" Pantz said.  
"That's pretty funny" Cloud laughed.

Jp was jotting down some notes on a small pocket sized notebook she was holding.

"So, you think we'll get a prize if we win. Like maybe that Halloween whopper" Cloud said.  
"Thought you were a Wendy's guy" Pantz said.  
"I am, but, well, you know...its black and cool...I wanna try it..." Cloud said.

A herd of bats flew over the three's heads, they covered themselves to not get struck.

"Weird" Cloud said.  
"Maybe they were flying away from something?" Jp suggested.  
"I hope not" Pantz said.

Above them something hung from the wall. It's eyes glowed yellow. It dropped down, directly above Pantz. Cloud, Pantz, and Jp started walking and the creature plopped to the ground right behind them.

"What the Shrek is that?" Cloud asked.

The creature hissed, revealing itself to be a man-bat hybrid.

"Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhjhjhhhhhh" Cloud screamed, and the three started running.

The man-bat leaped up and rough its wings out, swooping down towards them. The trio moved away from each other and the bat flew right between them. They tried running faster but the bat kept its speed with them.

"We can't outrun it, we're not fast enough!" Pantz shouted.  
"Looks like you forgot, I was on a track team." Cloud said, running faster.

Cloud ran past Jp, Pantz, and the man-bat.  
The bat flew closer to Pantz and hissed, opening its mouth. Pantz closed her eyes in fear as Cloud leapt on the bat. He started wailing on it and punched it in the eye.

"Don't hurt her..." Cloud cried out. The bat banged itself against the wall, stroking Cloud and making him fall off.  
"I can see a light" Jp shouted.

Pantz helped Cloud off the ground and they started running toward he light. The bat shook its head off and then started flying after them again. The light got brighter and brighter as they started climbing up steps. The bat crashed against the steps but threw its wing out and grabbed Pantz's leg. Pantz tried to crawl up but the bat was pulling her down. Cloud and Jp both grabbed onto a different arm of Pantz and tugged. They pulled up a few more steps and the bat bit down on Pantz. It growled and prepared for another attack, but the door at the top of the steps swung open. GingeraleDragon threw a fridge down the stairs, Cloud and Jp got out of the way and Pantz rolled over as the fridge struck the man-bat and carried him all the way down. Cloud, Jp, and Pantz joined Gingerale on the other side of the door as d closed it.

"That was" Gingerale started, putting glasses on.  
"Cool" he finished  
"A fridge? Really? Why a fridge?" Pantz asked.  
"You see, I said "cool" because a fridge keeps things-"  
"No I mean, why were you just carrying a fridge around?"  
"It was only two feet away from the door when I found it." Gingerale explained.  
"I would have done it cooler" Cloud admitted.  
"Really. Coming from the guy with a faggy Cloud costume. Let me guess, you're part of the swarm of people who just got Final Fantasy 7 recently because they announced its character is getting in Smash?" Gingerale asked.

[Gingerale in le confession toilet]  
"Every time a new Smash character gets announced everyone wants to go out and buy the game they're from suddenly, poseurs..."  
[le RNG]

"Uh, if you haven't noticed, my name is Cloud. As in Cloud." Cloud said.  
"Final Fantasy is like the flagship weeb series, but whatever. As long as it isn't Undertale" Gingerale said.  
"Whoa, you anti-Undertale too bro?" Cloud asked.  
"Of course. Game needs to die. As long as I live, I will NEVER play that shitty game. Also while we're at it, none of you have played Undertale right? Looks like it's spreading like a virus" Gingerale said.  
"Nope, Undertale-less for life dude" Cloud said.  
"Uh, no" Pantz said.  
"Uh, so. Oh yeah, Gingerale. You're on Stickboy's team, right?" Jp asked.  
"If he isn't on your team that doesn't leave much of a choice." Gingerale said.  
"I, uh, can you, give this to him? Don't mention my name, what I wrote should say it all" Jp said, handing Gingerale a letter.  
"Uh, yeah ok, sure. If it gives me another character arc.

The four just stood for a few seconds.

"So, were we supposed to disperse, or are we going together?" Pantz asked.  
"I thought the letter thing kind of implied Gingerale wouldn't be staying with us" Jp said.  
"Alright, alright, I get the message. I don't want to help out the other team anyways..." Gingerale said, walking away.

[Gingerale in le confession toilet]  
"Whatever Jp wrote in this letter must be important if she couldn't haven't just texted it. Why are we even allowed to use phones, this show is so unrestricted. Oh crap don't listen to this and ban phones or something I was just wondering"  
[le end]

Alice, Lemon, Mike, Riley, and Robot were in a small room.

"So. Robot. You're kind of the outlier here." Alice said.  
"Krogre" Mike said.  
"Is it because I have autism?" Robot asked.  
"What? No, I just meant you're the only one here not on our circle of friends" Alice said.  
"Way to make things awkward, Alice" Riley said.  
"We're all on the autism spectrum, just some have a little more than others" Lemon said nicely.  
"You know, this conversation is getting tense. Why don't we change the subject?" Mike subjected.  
"Anyone notice how there are some camera in, like, every room?" Lemon asked, examining a camera on the upper corner wall.  
"Maybe it's to record some spooky paranormal activity" Alice said.  
"Wait, in the newest movie they got a camera that can see ghosts. What if those cameras work like that?" Lemon asked.  
"Yo, GenesisFrenzy here. Sub to be at GenesisFrenzy on YouTube, Twitch, and all that. Even got a website, G-"  
"Shut up" Alice said.

Lemon, Mike, and Riley walked towards the camera to try and detach it.

"So, I notice you're wearing a hoodie like Sans. And have a drawn skelly on your face like Sans. You're dressed up as Sans?" Robot asked.  
"Oh yeah, I love me some Undertale" Alice said.  
"Me too, have you seen my Flowey animation?" Robot asked.

Lemon and Mike lifted Riley up, and as he reached for the camera, the conversation caught his attention.

"Alright guys I think that's enough about Undertale" Riley said, pulling his arm back to face the ladies.  
":s" Alice said.  
"Don't :s me I'm just saying let's talk about something else" Riley suggested.  
"Riley my arms, they tire" Lemon said as he collapsed to the ground.

Riley fell off Mike and Lemon and landed on the ground.

"That Sans fight took me days to beat!" Mike said.  
"Right, more spoilers. Thanks." Riley said.  
"Come on Riley you're the only person in this room who hasn't played Undertale yet and we're pretty sure you don't care if we talk about it or not" Alice said.  
"I'm just getting a little tired of all the praise. I mean, it beat Super Mario World on the Gamefaqs poll. Don't you think this is getting a bit ridiculous? It's only winning because everybody is riding on the hype" Riley said.  
"It's a Gamefaqs poll, and it was made just for fun, nobody cares" Alice said.  
"lol u mad to xDDD" Mile tainted.  
"I'M NOT EVEN MAD" Riley screamed, flipping a table and knocking Lemon down.  
"Freak" Alice said.  
"Hey Riley, maybe we can just sit down and settle this like-" Lemon began.

Riley smashed his Samsung off the ground and stepped on it to break it even more. He stormed onwards and left the group.

"Oh." Mike said.  
"Wanna talk about him while he's gone?" Robot asked.  
"No somebody might be a snoopy sally and tell him again" Alice said.

Riley bumped into Reu and Nicholas as he crossed the corner of the hallway he walked down.

"Reu! Grovyle guy! What's up?" Riley asked.  
"Well everyone else is fricking dead because of Reu so we were heading to the library to see if anybody else went back there" Nicholas said.  
"Biblioteca is Spanish for library" Reu informed.  
"Oh, cool. I just ditched be rest of my group" Riley said.  
"What? Why?" Reu asked.  
"They were talking about Undertale" Riley explained.  
"Good reason" Nicholas.  
"What is anime?" Reu asked.  
"Japanese cartoons, now come on, let's get to the library. Hallways give me the Bernie Sanders" Riley said, and the three walked on.  
"Oh yeah, Riley. I know you used to be really into amiibo, so I was wondering, maybe you can-" Reu began.  
"I gave that life up. The amiibo took over my life. I started obsessing over them too much, wasting money on each and every one of them. Preordering entire waves. I had to end it, I sold them all. I'm not going back to that life, Reu. I'm sorry." Riley said, brushing him off.  
"Aw, rats" Reu snapped.

Stickboy was sitting on the large table in the library, sadly tossing pebbles at the window.

"The way that you pose is so captivating..." Stickboy sadly sang to himself.

A door creaked opened and Stickboy turned towards it.

"Who's there?" He asked uninterested.  
"Oh, Stickboy. You're here, good. I have something for you" Gingerale said, pulling something out of his sweater pocket.  
"What is it?" Stickboy asked.  
"As you can see it is some sort of paper device with words on them. It's a letter dingus, read it" Gingerale said, sliding the paper towards him as he sat down at the table.

Stickboy picked it up and read the letter. His mouth opened as he continued down the lines, closing in the space between his eyes and the writing.

"Gingerale...did you...write this?" Stickboy asked.  
"What." Gingerale said.  
"I had no idea you felt this way. It's written so passionately...it's so...adorable. After the way I acted over the amiibo, I don't think I deserve to be treated so nicely..." Stickboy said.  
"That letter was signed, right?" Gingerale asked.  
"You know what, alright. Y-yeah, let's do it! Let's go on a date!" Stickboy said.

Cloud, Jp, and Pantz stood by the elevator, waiting for it to stop at their floor.

"You know, I kinda rushed the last bit of the letter since we were being chased by that bat thing. I hope I didn't forget anything..." Jp said.  
"Did Jp accidentally go anon!?" Cloud asked.

The elevator stopped and opened its doors, Rydli, Marrowsky, Element, and Mr. Moogle stepped out.

"Whoa hey guys" Pantz said.  
"Hey." Marrowsky said.  
"We were on our way to the library to set up a trap for the anon. Want to accompany us?" Rydli asked.  
"Sure" Cloud said.

The group started walking down the hall.

"So Moogle turned out alright." Pantz noticed.  
"Yeah. Hey yo Pantz, you check out Joel's stream of Undertale? Pretty kektacular" Moogle said.  
"Don't listen to him Pantz, his mind has been corrupted by Undertale. Stay pure like me and Element." Cloud warned.  
"Yeah. Undertale. So cringe" Element said.  
"Damn right" Cloud nodded.  
"Yeah, heh, stupid fanbase and their dumb jokes and awful porn...heh, anime's real though, right?" Element asked.  
"Yeah, right. Dumb jokes, cringe porn I can't jack it too, and anime is re-wait what?" Cloud asked.  
"Nothing, nothing. Anime's real though, right?" Element chuckled.  
"Elrmrnt, you haven't...played Undertale, have you?" Cloud asked, stopping his walk.  
"Well, I didn't plan to. But, well, Moogle gifted it to me. I had to" Element shrugged.  
"No...no...they got Element..." Cloud said, backing up.  
"It's actually a pretty good game, it's just the fanbase man. I think you'd like it. You should try it, Cloud" Element said.  
"Never!" Cloud said, backing up and falling down.

Jp and Pantz helped Cloud up.

"Having a bad time, Cloud?" Rydli asked.  
"No, no, not Rydli too!" Cloud shouted.  
"He just asked you if you're having a bad time that doesn't mean he necessarily played the game" Marrowsky said.  
"Oh no I played it" Rydli said.  
"Oh" Marrowsky said.

Marrowsky walked away from Moogle, Element, and Rydli, joining Jp, Cloud, and Pantz as they backed away.

"Is anime real?" Element asked.  
"Is anime real?" Moogle asked.  
"Is anime real?" Rydli asked.

Their eyes turned red and their voices grew deeper.

"Is anime real?" they asked in unison.

"NO!" Cloud screamed.  
"Well, it is." Marrowsky said.

The four started running away. Several doors were on each side of the hall they ran down. Cloud opened one door and peeked in.

"Oh, Cloud? Hey friend" Lemon greeted.

"Alright it's just Lemon and his weeb images" Cloud said with a sign of relief.  
"Oh, weebs? Speaking of weebs, have you heard of the weeb dino from Undertale? Sh-"

Cloud slammed the door on Lemon's face.

"He seemed fine to me" Marrowsky said.  
"Not taking any chances. We gotta keep going" Cloud said, and the four pressed on.

Moogle, Element, and Rydli crawled on the walls behind them.

"Is anime real?" they asked.

Lemon turned to the others.

"That was rude." Lemon said.  
"Bishes don't listen -3-" Mike said.

Cloud, Marrowksy, Jp, and Pantz ran across a corner and bumped into Reu, Nicholas, and Riley.

"You guys haven't played Undertale, right?" Cloud asked.  
"Is anime real?" Reu asked.  
"I can't tell if he's been infected or if that's just regular Reu so I'll let that pass" Cloud said.  
"We were heading for the library to meet up with anyone else there" Reu explained.  
"Same here, we were going to set up a trap to reveal the anon" Marrowsky said.  
"It shouldn't be far from here, let's get a move on" Riley said, and the group marched forth.

GINGERALEDRAGON AND STICKBOY'S LOVELY DINNER DATE START. . . ?

"Sorry I forgot to slip into a costume earlier, what with the falling out of the plane earlier. How does this look? It's Goku, from Dragon Ball. The Gokster." Stickboy said, walking or in his Goku costume.

LOVELY DINNER DATE! START!

"Let's date the shit out of this" Stickboy said.

Gingerale and Stickboy sat across from each other at the table as a long moment of awkward silence joined them.  
Stickboy looked around awkwardly as Gingerale eyes him with a straight expression.

"So. Uh...do you...like...Undertale?" Stickboy asked.  
"No." Gingerale answered flatly.  
"Oh..." Stickboy said.

Stickboy looked around awkwardly some more, some sweat breaking out as he tapped his legs under the table.

"So...hey, uh. How about we go somewhere?" Stickboy suggested.  
"We're in the middle of a challenge and we're not allowed to leave the mansion" Gingerale said.  
"That's ok, we can, sit out on the balcony. That looks like a nice place" Stickboy said.

The thunder clapped and the rain came down harder.

Gingerale and Stickboy opened the door and walked outside on the balcony, the rain poured on their heads as they looked over beyond the balcony. The door closed behind them.  
Cloud, Marrowsky, Reu, Riley, Nicholas, Pantz, and Jp then walked into the library as Gingerale and Stickboy left.

"Alright let's sit down and discuss our plans" Riley said as the group walked towards the table.

"This is a nice place" Stickboy said.

Gingerale stayed quiet.

"Hey, uh, I have some stuff you might like. How about a stand to keep all your amiibo on?" Stickboy asked, taking a stand out of his pocket.  
"Ok" Gingerale said as he took ahold of it.  
"Or a balance board to play Wii Fit...ok maybe not that one" Stickboy said, putting it back in his backpack.

Stickboy dug more into his bag to find something.

"You know what, forget about the gifts. You know what would make this more romantic? Some champagne" Stickboy said, unscrewing the cap, causing it to strike Gingerale on the eye as the bottle blew open.  
"Sorry about that. Uh, well, hey, how about a nice romantic candle!" Stickboy said, picking a candle up, which was immediately extinguished by the rain.  
"Let's just forget the romantic junk" Stickboy said.

Gingerale tugged on his sombrero so it kept the rain from hitting his face.

"You know, I bet Jp would like this view. She has a certain, view liking personality...wait a minute? Is that her in the library? Oh crap, Gingerale you can't let her see me on a date with you. I gotta hide!" Stickboy said, leaping over the balcony.

Stickboy grabbed onto the ledge to keep himself from falling.

Jp opened the door and walked out onto the balcony.

"Hey. This is a pretty weird place to be standing alone. Anyways, I don't think you should give Stickboy that letter. I forgot to write something on it, so I'm just going to give him it myself." Jp explained.  
"Oh, well, I don't have it. I don't have that letter, that you, Jp, wrote, directed towards Stickboy. The letter that Jp wrote for Stickboy that you gave to me to deliver to him, written by Jp, is no longer in my possession" Gingerale said.  
"What! Well, did you see Stickboy? Did you already give it to him?" Jp asked.  
"No" Gingerale answered.  
"Oh no, I gotta find him before he catches the Undertale disease" Jp said, running back into the library.

Stickboy climbed back over the balcony, standing next to Gingerale and sighing. He was drenched in water.

"So, Jp was the one who really wrote that latter?" Stickboy ssked.  
"Oh I don't know maybe" Gingerale shrugged.  
"Oh man, Jp...she's just so...Jp, Jp, Jp, and I mean, Jp...Jp...she's so cool and nice and smart and...so...Jp, Jp...Jp...Jp, I...Jp. I mean, I even threw that Pokémon match for her, not that she couldn't win herself, but, I just wanted to help out, since she's so...Jp. But hey, you're still cool, but like, she's cooler...cooliest..." Stickboy said.  
"This wasn't going anywhere" Gingerale said.  
"If she found out I threw the challenge, do you think she'd be upset? I mean she still lost, so it wouldn't matter that much, right? Stickboy asked.  
"Keep letting her win she'd like that" Gingerale suggested.  
"No, no, I can't. It wouldn't benefit either of us. Our teams wouldn't like it either. I should just be straight with her, maybe I should just...ask her out? But how could I work up the courage to do so?" Stickboy asked.  
"Hmmm" Gingerale thought.  
"Roleplay" the cameraman whispered.  
"What was that? Roleplay...hey, that's not a bad idea!" Stickboy said.  
"What? I didn't say that! Roleplaying? Bozzzzz..." Gingerale said.

War flashbacks came back to Gingerale as he recalled his days as a roleplayer on haiku.

[le flashback]  
"Alright, I think it's finally time to return to haiku." Rydli said.

Rydli looked around and nobody was there, some tumbleweed rolled across the recent entries.

"Where...is everyone?" Rydli asked, walking past the antenna.

A large pit laid in front of him, some loud noises came from below. Rydli removed the top and started climbing down the pit, a sign saying "roleplay chat" was blown away.

Rydli continued to climb down until he got to the bottom. A bunch of furries, ponies, and anime characters were humping each other.

"Welcome to the orgy pit o3o" Mega Man said as he walked by.

"Is this what haiku has become?" Rydli asked himself.  
"Well I guess if this will make me fit in..." Rydli said.

"Sup bro, new member of the orgy pit? Welcome, name's Dusk, here's my card" Dusk greeted, handing Rydli his business card as he leaped into an orgy pile.

Rydli read the business card.

"Dusk  
Chronic Masturbator  
Local Rp Chat Enthusiast"

"This is my life now..." Rydli said quietly.  
"You think your life is bad? I'm a trombone player" Gingerale said as he walked by.  
[le back to le present]

"Ok, I'll do it. However, it will be ironically" Gingerale said.  
"Alright cool! Should you be Jp, or should I?" Stickboy asked.  
"You should be Jp" Gingetale suggested.  
"Meeeeeeee? Uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh alright, I'll say what I think Jp would say. EEEEEE. Sup. Oh, Stickboy. Nice abs. You work out because you look totally kawaii desu tonight. Seriously you look amazing. However I only say this ironically and would never ask you out" Stickboy said.  
"I like American Idol Pokémon RP featuring Dante from the Metal Gear Rising Series" Gingerale said.  
"Hahaha, that's irrelevant Stick my man. And I don't mean my man I mean my friend man. My man" Stickbou said.  
"-turns in2 my OC an Garchomp with bionic red arm and eyepatch with shrapnel in mt forhead-" Gingerale did.  
"Whoa, nice. Stickboy you're pretty rad. Get any new amiibo lately? I think people who collect amiibo are really hot" Stickboy said.  
"Jp I think you're hot you should fuck me" Gingerale said.  
"What!? Stickboy? What the heck has gotten into you? Treat me with some respect or I'll slap you right across the penis" Stickboy warned.  
"I'd like that babe. But if u gon give me done fuk at least kiss me first" Gingerale said, giving Stickboy a smooch.  
"AAAAAAAAAH. Stickboy, what was that? That was so weird, you're such a freak! But I won't lie you sure know how to give a good smooch, probably from practicing with you're very rare and cool looking Wii Fit Trainer amiibo...oh I wouldn't mind another from a stud like you..." Stickboy said.  
"-spreads arms and leaps on you, humping it up-" Gingerale did.  
"Stickboy! That feels do good, but, n-no. You're a dweeb. Go build a sand castle or something, or, ir, saaaaAaaaaaaAV, I'm Jp and I love Stickboy's finger!" Stickboy screamed as Gingerale fingered him.  
"Like it in the butt, Hun? Oh yeah I'm Stickboy I'm such A nerd gonna do it on the hut" Gingerale said, laying Stickboy down and doing him the butt.  
"AAAAAH. Taaaaawr I'm Jp look at me roar as Stickboy gives it to me like his dirty amiibo" Stickboy yelled.  
"I came my semen right into his anus" Gingerale said.

Jp walked out onto the balcony.  
Gingerale dropped Stickboy as they both turned towards her.

"What." Jp asked.  
"Oh, hey. What's up?" Stickboy asked as he got up.  
"Why were you two screaming and why isn't Gingerale wearing any pants?" Jp asked.  
"Long story. I was, uh, giving him a prostrate exam" Stickboy lied.  
"Were you two...doing each other?" Jp asked.  
"No." Gingerale said.  
"You screamed "I came my semen right into his anus"" Jp said.  
"Ugh you took that completely out of context" Gingerale defended.  
"It's not what you think, we were actually Roleplaying the sex as if it was you" Stickboy explained.

Everybody stood quietly. The others watched the scene from behind the door. Stickboy looked at the ground as Gingerale slowly put his pants back on. Stickboy looked at the moon, and then to Jp.

"Jp, I...haven't been honest with you. When we were against each other in that Pokémon battle, I purposely gave my Pokémon bad orders. When you said you wished the toilet wasn't automatic anymore, I was actually smuggling toilet paper and didn't offer you any. When you asked if I wanted to watch some anime together and I said I was busy masturbating, I was actually organizing my amiibo. When I told you I was busy studying for my History exam, I was actually playing Undertale. Which isn't real. When I told you I was really feeling it, I was actually not really feeling it. I've made up stuff a lot, some lies better then others, I mean why would I be studying for a History exam in the middle of a world tour, but I'm sorry...I'm just kinda shy. But I think, I think you're pretty neat Jp...and when I'm around you...when I'm around you I'm really feeling it" Stickboy said.  
"Oh, Stickboy...I'm really feeling it around you too..." Jp smiled, hugging him.

Stickboy closed his eyes and accepted the embrace for a moment before Jp lifted him up.  
Jp dribbled Stickboy across the balcony and shot him at a window, which he crashed into. Like this.

"Getttttttt dunked on" Reu shouted from the library.

"That was a bit excessive, don't you think?" Gingerale asked.

Stickboy climbed out the window and fell flat on his face on the balcony

"I don't care if you're a nerd who likes Undertale or amiibo or hiding toilet paper. You're passionate about what you like and in my book that makes you a-ok. All you need to be is happy with yourself" Jp said.  
"So, I should forget about finding my Wii Fit Trainer amiibo?" Stickboy asked.  
"No, you should find it. And Reu will help you. Now go out there and continue doing what you love" Jp said.  
"You're right! And after that I'll ask you out" Stickboy said confidently.  
"What?" Jp asked.  
"Nothing" Stickboy said as he reentered the mansion.

Gingerale and Jp were left alone.

"He was just lying about that stuff he said earlier though, right? Undertale's real. Right!?" Jp asked.  
"Undertale isn't real." Gingerale snapped.  
"What...WHAT!"

Jp jumped off the balcony.

Gingerale walked back into the library.

"Oh, everyone's here. Jp just left the game so I guess we're one person down." Gingerale said.  
"Cloud, Marrowsky, Gingerale, Nicholas, Riley, Reu, Stickboy, and me, Pantz" Pantz recapped.  
"Cloud Strife, Sebastion from Black Butler, Dunban wearing a sombrero, Hitler, Sonic the Hedgehog, Caesar, Goku, and Aerih" she continued.  
"What kind of creatures have we all witnessed?" Reu asked.  
"We saw a tarantula and a bunch of horny skeletons." Marrowsky said.  
"An invisible guy and a man-bat. There was something else but we didn't get to find out what it was. Wait, I think Jp saw his face. In retrospect probably should have asked her" Cloud said.  
"Some spooky ghosts, and let's not forget the furry bait werewolf" Nicholas said.  
"Oh and the other haikuers are talking about a game we don't want to play" Riley said.  
"Wow how horrifying" Reu rolled his eyes.  
"I don't get it, this is Dracula's Castle. But a bunch of others are here as well...it's crammed with monsters...almost as if this was like some sort of..." Pantz started.

Everyone thought critically about what could be the answer.

"I got it! Jack Black is Dracula and all of his written copies of Goodebumps are coming to life inside the mansion!" Riley said.

Everybody exchanged questionable glances

"Well we can't set up our trap. If we turn anon off on our phones we'll just stop receiving questions. It will only work if Element turns anon off, we need to get him back." Marrowksy said.

Gingerale checked his phone as another popped up on his screen.

"Is anime real?" it read.

"It's spreading to . This thing can go viral, we gotta get out of here before it strikes" Gingerale warned.  
"If you don't play Undertale, don't go on the plane tomorrow. I don't want you to be here when it happens." Cloud said.  
"You want to know what I suggest?" Marrowsky asked.

Marrowksy stabbed a dagger into the table to catch everyone's attention.

"I say we stop running and fight back." he advised.  
"We can't fight back, what will we use? Our bare strength? We might as well just ask somebody for help" Reu said.  
"Ask somebody for help? We can't do that, I think it's against the rules. And calling the police never works in horror movies. Who else would we turn to? Who are we gonna call?" Pantz asked.

Marrowsky opened a closet, revealing a stack of vacuums at their disposal.

[Nicholas in le confession toilet]  
"Oh, so it's Luigi's Mansion!"  
[le end]

There eight suited up, zipping up their uniforms and strapping the vacuums to their backs. They strapped their night vision goggles onto their eyes. All while Stickboy played the Ghostbusters theme on his phone.

[Stickboy in le confession toilet]  
"That was worth wasting the last 5% of my battery"  
[le end]

As Cloud was finishing strapping up, he felt a hand on his shoulder.

"Hey, Cloud. If, if something happens to me out there. If, if I become an Undertaleing. Please. Erase me..." Gingerale requested.

They locked eyes and Cloud nodded.

"I will" Cloud sniffles.  
"I WILL!"

"You know, maybe we're blowing this out of proportion a bit. Undertale's a good game and all, if they're having a good time playing it who are we to make them stop?" Reu asked.

Cloud and Gingerale pointed their vacuums at Reu.

"Are you one of them?" Cloud asked.  
"Uh, well, take away the red eyes and distorted voices and...maybe?" Reu asked.

Cloud charged his vacuum.

"Reu should stop supporting worthless indie garbage developer babies and play real games by real companies like the halos and the marios and the uncharteds" Cloud said.  
"Reu should stop supporting worthless indie garbage developer babies and play real games by real companies like the halos and the marios and the uncharteds" Reu repeated.  
"Reu should stop supporting worthless indie garbage developer babies and play real games by real companies like the halos and the marios and the uncharteds" Reu repeated.  
"Reu should stop supporting worthless indie garbage developer babies and play real games by real companies like the halos and the marios and the uncharteds" Reu repeated.  
"Hold up, that was some fine shitposting, son. He's still good" Cloud said, putting his vacuum down.  
"What happens if they get us? What will they do, kill us?" Pantz asked.  
"No, they'll try to...understand us..." Nicholas said.  
"Sick" Gingerale cringed.  
"Twisted.." Cloud said.  
"They're programmed to feel like shit if they try hurt people" Nicholas said.  
"You seem to know quite a bit of info about them, Nick." Cloud said.  
"It's just the synopsis, everyone should know that much..." Nicholas said.  
"So we push through and try to find Element. Take his phone, turn anon off, and expose the anon." Marrowsky said.

Everyone nodded and Marrowsky kicked be door down, they all walked forth. The hall split into two parts, going left and right.

"Four for each direction. Well split up and cover the floor, meet up near the elevator on the other side" Nicholas said.  
"Alright, splitting up never fails" Riley said.

Nicholas, Gingerale, Cloud, and Pantz headed down the left path.  
Reu, Stickboy, Riley, and Marrowsky took the right.

"You guys don't actually hate Undertale, do you?" Reu asked.  
"I'm not judging it before I play it. I'm just snot letting the hype get to me, it'll make me disappointed." Riley said.  
"You're such an idiot for thinking that way" Stickboy said.  
"I just don't care for it. Whatever." Marrowksy shrugged.

Riley checked his phone.

"Hm. Oh. Wow, nice" Riley nodded.  
"Focus, Riley" Reu said.  
"I will, I will, just...oh wow, nice" Riley said.  
"Reu slapped the phone out of Riley's hands."  
"I have like seventeen phones." Riley said, taking out another.

The four were quiet as they pressed on.

"So, uh, guys. You like anime? I have like 50 waifus" Riley said.

No one said anything.

"I bet you guys are great at parties. So uh, that anime. It's real, right?" Riley asked.  
"What was that?" Marrowksy asked, stopping.  
"Noting. Just. Uh. Anime's...anime's real, right?" Riley asked.  
"Have you played Undertale?" Marrowksy asked, backing up.  
"Ok maybe a bit. I had to see if it was as good as everyone said. Just, just, ANIME'S REAL, RIGHT!?" Riley screamed, his head turning 360 degrees.  
"Jesus fuck that actually hurts. Ow, ahh, ooooow" Riley grunted.

Marrowsky, Stickboy, and Reu ran away from Riley, cutting the corner and running at full speed. The lights flickered as the entire hall began slowly rotating.

"I don't get it. You guys have played Undertale, right? Why aren't you acting like the rest of them?" Marrowsky asked.  
"I don't know do I look like I know?" Stickboy asked.  
"No I was asking rethroically" Marrowksy said.

The hall continued rotating, and the three fell off balanced. Marrowksy turned his vacuum on and pointed it upwards. The lights flickered harshly as a green cloud flew out of the wall, sucking into Marrowsky's vacuum. The lights stopped flickering and the floor ceased its rotation. All of the paintings fell off the walls. Marrowsky picked his coach hat off the ground. Reu got up. Stickboy rubbed his head and opened his eyes, his vision was a little blurry, but ahead he saw a hooded figure holding something in his hand. As his vision become more focused, he could make out the white figurine wearing blue. It was the lovely Wii Fit Trainer.

"IT'S HER! LOOK! IT'S HER!" Stickboy shouted, getting up and running.  
"Stickboy, hold on" Marrowsky said, tightening his vacuum before running after him. Reu followed behind.

NichoLs, GinegsL, Lcouf, and Langz were heading down the hallway when they saw Mike ahead.

"Mike..." Nicholas said, but Gingerale stopped him from moving forward.  
"It's a trap. He's got Undertale in his veins" Gingerale said.

Nicholas stepped forward and Mike ran towards them. Nicholas closed his eyes as Mike jumped at him, but Pantz knocked Mike out of the way with a frying pan.

"Why do you have a frying pan?" Gingerale asked.  
"Well a woman's always on the kitchen so naturally she always has a frying pan on her" Cloud explained.

Pantz knocked Cloud with the frying pan.

More haikuers emerged from down the hall. They stared crawling towards them, so the group opened a door and his in the room, boarding he door up.

"Nice pussying out" Nicholas complimented.  
"Aren't you supposed to be watching your language?" Gingerale asked.  
"It's a pussy cat nothing wrong with that" Nicholas said.  
"Guess we'll have to hide out in here." Cloud said.  
"Hey Cloud. You see that closet over there. You should come out of it" Nicholas said.  
"But I'm not in the closet" Cloud said.  
"So you're out of the closet?" Nicholas asked.  
"No, I'm not affiliated with the closet at all" Cloud said.

Nicholas pushed Cloud into the closet.

"You gonna come out now?" Nicholas taunted.  
"I'm not going to not not come out of the closet because it was never something I wasn't not going into?" Cloud said.  
"Come on Cloud come out of the closet" Pantz said.  
"I can't it will make me gay" Cloud said.  
"But being in the closet in the first place would make you gay wouldn't it?" Pantz asked.  
"No!" Cloud said.

Pantz walked into the closet, grabbing Cloud's hand. She tried helping him up but fell down as Nicholas shut the closet and locked it.

"Good. As serious as this is a game is a game and we shouldn't shy away from eliminating the other players" Nicholas said, dusting his hands off.  
"Haha, nice. I can always count on you, Nickipoo" Gingerale said.  
"Yup. Feeling chipper, Gingerale?" Nicholas asked.  
"Not at the moment. But I bet I would if I had a nice fap." Gingerale said.  
"Go ahead, have a little fun. I'll look in the other direction while you do it to give you some privacy. Just want you to be in your best mood, my friend" Nicholas said.  
"Wow, thanks Jochola!" Gingerale said.

Gingerale's phone vibrated. He picked it out of his pocket and read he notification.

"Don't trust Nicholas" the new question read.

"You know. Nicholas would usually insult me and tell me I'm a piece of shit" Gingerale said, lifting his head from the phone.  
"Ok. That's cool. So you gonna jerk off or should I do it myself?" Nicholas asked.  
"Nicholas...you...you played Undertale too, didn't you? I remember now, you did" Gingerale said.  
"What? Well, ok, yeah. Sure, I did. It's a good game, alright. It's not like I'm posting memes about it" Nicholas defended.

Gingerale lifted his vacuum, pointing it directly at Nicholas as it charged up.

"Whoa, easy there slugger. You might poke somebody's eye out with that thing" Nicholas said.  
"How do I know you're not one of them? How do I know you won't try to convert me? I bet you're wearing underwear with Undertale quotes on them right now! I bet you have the entire ost downloaded! That's what you were busy listening to for three hours last night, wasn't it!?" Gingerale shouted, slowly backing up.  
"Ginge, put the vacuum cleaner down. I don't know what you plan to accomplish with that. It's me, Nickipoo. You can trust me..." Nichols said.

Gingerale fell down. He steadied the vacuum as he backed up a bit more. He saw a shotgun leaning against the door and grabbed it.

"THAT'S NOT WHAT ANON SAID" Gingerale screamed, pointing the shotgun at Nicholas.

Meanwhile, Cloud and Pantz were in the closet.

"So. Sounds like they're having fun." Pantz said.  
"Yeah" Cloud said.  
"Stickboy was pretty cute earlier. I love when people are honest" Pantz said.  
"Oh. Uh. Uh. I, uh. Hey, let's find a way out of here" Cloud said, looking around.

Cloud pulled a string and the entire closet's back wall shattered. Cloud and Pantz peeked in and started walking through.

"Gingerale I think you should put the gun down" Nicholas said.  
"You also think Undertale is good, so you're full of bad opinions. I'd rather die before joining the likes of you!" Gingerale screamed, putting the gun in his mouth and pulling the trigger. But nothing came out, Gingerale was safe.  
"Damn, so close" Nicholas said.  
"Maybe it's jammed" Gingerale said, pointing the gun at a wall and pulling the trigger. The bullets shot out and struck a portrait of Kevin James, causing it to fall off the wall.

Nicholas and Gingerale walked up to the Kevin James poster.

"Dracula likes Kevin James? Wow!" Nicholas said.  
"Who's Kevin James I just see Paul Blart" Gingerale said.

The thunder struck again as someone appeared at the window.

"So. We meet at last" the figure said.  
"Holy shot. It's...Adam Sandler..." Gingerale said.

Adam Sandler jumped through the window and in front of Nicholas and Gingerale.

"I was called about being on this show. But then I was told they found somebody else. And now you have the audacity to come to my home and frolic about filming your show. What's the matter, too good for me?" Adam Sandler gawked.  
"It's just a dumb little show, we would have figured out standards were low enough so you wouldn't want to be on it" Gingerale said.  
"Dude it's Adam Sandler he doesn't have standards" Nicholas whispered.  
"Oh yeah right" Gingerale said.  
"Why are you living in Transylvania anyways?" Nicholas asked.  
"Really? Hotel Transylvania? It was a hit. A bunch of monsters stay here for vacation" Adam Sandler explained.  
"Must have forgotten about that one. You have so many bad films I kind of blocked out any potentially good ones" Nicholas said.  
"But wait, why are the monsters chasing everyone?" Gingerale asked.  
"1. They don't like humans. 2. They're cranky. They didn't eat breakfast" Adam Sandler explained.

[le flashback]  
"Where were you are for in the past preceding this Marowsky?" Joe asked.  
"Eating breakfast. It's the most important mean of the day" Marrowsky reminded everyone.

"Dude it's the middle of the night you shouldn't be eating breakfast" Element said.  
"It's the most important mean of the day" Marrowksy informed.

"Stay out of my flashbacks you guys weren't even there when I said those things." Marrowsky said.  
[le back to le present]

"Wow..." Gingerale said.

[Gingerale in le confession toilet]  
"So Adam Sandler's a vampire. Honestly not surprised he isn't human. He would have made a fine Pokémon"  
[le end]

"Mr. Sandler. I'll be frank with you. I'm the one who suggested you to join our team as a mascot. It was Nicholas who shot down my idea and made us pick someone else" Gingerale confessed.  
"Oh, alright then. You can go free. Nicholas, I'll kill." Adam Sandler said.  
"Cool thank" Gingerale said, walking out as Nicholas screamed.  
"Oh wait, Sandler. You know how to stop everyone from posting Undertale memes?" Gingerale asked.  
"Well if you want to stop vampires you gotta kill the head vampire. Zombies you find patient zero...so, if you can find the one who started it all, ending them could stop the effect" Adam Sandler advised.  
"Really? Cool, but who was the first haikuer to play Undertale...who is Patient Zero..." Gingerale asked.  
"Gingerale, I know who it is. You have to kill Reu." Nicholas said.

Reu ran after Stickboy, Marrowsky behind him.  
They jumped over debris as they chased down the hooded figure. They cut a corner and a crowd of haikuers were gathered down the hall.

"Is anime real?" Ziggy asked.  
"Is anime real?" Lemon asked.  
"Is anime real?" Mike asked.  
"Is anime real?" Mr. Moogle asked.  
"Is anime real?" Alice asked.  
"Is real anime?" StarForce asked.  
"StarForce you fucked it up goddamit" Grenade complained.

The figure rushed past all of the haikuers, not letting them touch him.

"What the, he just walked right by them" Stickboy said.  
"Yes. It's called letting people enjoy what they want and not letting it affect you." Marrowsky said, demonstrating by walking through the crowd and avoiding all of the changes.  
Reu and Stickboy followed, rushing past all of the haikuers as they changed "Is anime real?" over and over.

The werewolf howled from behind and started tearing through the crowd.

"We have company" Reu shouted, pushing faster.

Eventually the the though, in time to see the hooded figure at the end of he next hall, boarding the elevator. They all ran as fast as they could, but by the time they got to the elevator he was already heading up.

"He's heading for the rooftop" Stickboy said, looking up.  
"Should we use the stairs?" Marrowsky asked.  
"Well, no, that would be too much work.." Stickboy said.

Cloud and Pantz came running from the other side of the hall.

"You guys alright?" Reu asked.  
"Yeah" Cloud said.  
"You betcha" Pantz said.  
"Did they get Riley?" Cloud asked.  
"Oh yeah. The Undertale got him." Marrowsky said.  
"Whatever, that's alright. He gets sacrificed on a daily basis" Cloud said.

Gingerale slowly walked up from the hall Cloud and Pantz took.

"Hey guys. Everything alright?" Gingerale asked. He held his hands behind his back.  
"Yeah we were just heading for the roof. We saw someone take the elevator, it could be the anon" Stickboy said.  
"Nice. So. We found out this is actually a hotel for monsters and the monsters are just pissed at us because they didn't eat breakfast" Gingerale explained.  
"Then let's just make them breakfast?" Reu said.  
"Oh. I may have eaten all of the food." Marrowsky said.  
"Fatty." Cloud said.

The elevator opened up.

"After you" Reu said to Gingerale.  
"No, after ME" Gingerale said, walking in.

Gingerale leaned against the back. Cloud and Marrowsky stood on each of his sides. Reu stood in front of him, Stickboy in front of Marrowsky and Pantz in front of Cloud. The door closed and the elevator started moving up. Behind Gingerale's back, he held the shotgun in his hands.  
The elevator started going up, everyone stood quietly as smoothing elevator music played.

"So. How about them Halos?" Cloud asked.  
"And Marios" Stickboy said.  
"Don't forget the Uncharteds" Gingerale said.  
"I can't go to hell, I don't have enough vacation days" Pantz said.  
"Oh. That came out of nowhere" Cloud said.  
"Wait. Was that...an Undertale joke?" Gingerale asked.  
"Well, uh, maybe? I just.." Pantz said.

The rest of the group gathered in the corner of the group.

"Pantz!? PANTZ!? You don't like Undertale, do you!?" Cloud asked.  
"It's not what it looks like. I just watched one video to see what would it look like. You know just out of curiosity. I didn't intend on liking it, but well, it has some good humor, and the characters look pretty cool so I looked into them a little more..." Pantz explained.  
"Pantz, not you...not you..." Cloud cried.  
"It's ok, we don't need to end Pantz. We just need to end Reu." Gingerale said, loading the gun and pointing it at Reu.

Cloud, Marrowksy, and Stickboy ducked. Reu held his arms out. Gingerale went to pull the trigger but Reu tackled him, pushing Gingerale against the wall. Gingerale pulled the trigger and it shot at the opposite wall. The elevator shook, and the doors flew open. Cloud and Stickboy leapt out. Gingerale punched Reu and jumped out of the elevator. The ropes attached to the elevator began to snap. Reu tried to regain consciousness. Marrowksy helped him up, pushing him out the door. The rope snapped and the elevator flew downwards.

"Pantz! Marrowsky!? No!" Cloud screamed, pounding the door.  
"What the fuck was that all about?" Reu asked.  
"I'm sorry Reu I was just trying to eliminate Patient Zero and rid the world of undertalecringe. Is that really so bad?" Gingerale asked.  
"Guys we can kill each other later. We can take the stairs, we aren't far from the roof." Stickboy said.

Stickboy, Cloud, Reu, and Gingerale started climbing the stairs. Not far behind, the werewolf was running up as well.

"Pantz...Marrowsky...no one is safe...it's going to get us all...first the Internet...then the public...it'll start being recognized as one of the best games ever...everyone will have played it...even Obama will play it...it's going to get us all...Undertale will consume us all..." Cloud said.

The four busted through the door at the top of the stairs, arriving at the rooftop. The hooded figure stood at the edge of the roof, Wii Zit Trainer in hand.

"No Bob? I'm Gon save you Yrainr!" Stickboy shouted, running after him.  
"No!" Reu shouted, falling down.

The werewolf ran up behind them.

"Oh shit we gotta get him some breaky" Gingerale said.  
"Where are we going to find breakfast at this hour of the night? Nobody serves breakfast this late! NOBODY!" Cloud shouted.

Reu looked over and saw a McDonald's on the horizon.

"Guys, I found something." Reu said.  
"How are we supposed to get all the way over there?" Gingerale asked.

A bunch of Thanksgiving balloons flew by.

"Are we playing by the don't touch the lava law? As long as we don't touch the ground, we shouldn't be eliminated" Gingerale said.

The werewolf charged at them.  
Gingerale, Reu, and Cloud jumped off the roof of the mansion, sliding down the roof, they plopped off and landed on a Bart Simpson balloon. They all ran across the balloon and jumped to the next one, a Pikachu balloon.

"Pikachu's from Japan" Cloud said.

They all jumped to the next one, Sonic the Hedgehog.

"Riley, oh man I'm holding back the tears dawg..." Cloud said.

Cloud jumped to the next one. As Reu went to jump, Gingerale grabbed his leg and made him fall. Reu turned back and looked at Gingerale.

"Dang it. You forgot to jump." Gingerale said, shoving him off the balloon.  
"Goodbag Jojo" Reu shouted.

Reu plummeted below and crashed into a bunch of trees. Gingerale jumped to the next balloon.

The hooded figure jumped off the rooftop and slid down the shit. Stickboy followed. At the bottom, the figure jumped onto the Bart Simpson balloon. Stickboy jumped on too. They looked at each other. Like cool. The hooded figure took a step to the left, revealing Jp laying down unconsciously.

"Jp!" Stickboy said.

The figure placed his foot on Jp, and kicked her towards the edge of the balloon. He dropped he Wii Fit Trainer and it slid to the opposite side of the balloon. He jumped off and left Stickboy alone. Stickboy looked to the amiibo on the left and Jp on the right, and thought about which one to save.

Cloud and Gingerale continued to jump balloon to balloon. They jumped on a turkey, then a SpongeBob one. Next was a minion. Ew! Next was a Santa. They were close enough to a McDonald's. Gingerale untied the rope on the balloon and attached it to Cloud. Cloud jumped off the balloon and Gingerale held onto the rope to keep him air bound. The ballon started lifting up as Cloud descended.

The McDonald's employee was playing Clash of Clans on his iPhone with his mouth gapping open, his zit infested face glued to the screen. Behind him, Cloud came crashing through the drive thru window.

"Ehhhhhh slick tonmcodnl may o take you ordered?" he asked with a bored expression.  
"Just give me as much breakfast shit as you can" Cloud shouted, holding onto the window as the rope tried to pull him back.  
"Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeh would you like fries with that ehhhhhhhhh?" He asked.  
"No!" Cloud said.  
"That'll be $58.75" he said.

[Cloud in le confession toilet]  
"I was going to use that money for Xenoblade Chronicles X...but sometimes men have to make sacrifices"  
[le end]

The man handed Cloud the bag as he was whisked out of the window. Gingerale pulled himself up, back to the top of the balloon.

"Nice Cloud" Gingerale complimented.  
"Now let's get back to the mansion and stop Undertale from taking over the world" Cloud said.  
"One problem. We're going up" Gingerale said.

Cloud looked down and noticed the balloon continued to fly upwards.

"Looks like we're going to have to jump" Cloud said.  
"Dang it, what if I forget to? Nicholas wouldn't let me hear the end of it..." Gingerale said.  
"It's ok, dude. I lost my ump before. We'll do this together" Cloud said.

Gingerale and Cloud looked at each other and nodded. Cloud kept a tight grip onto his McDonald's bag.

"Make sure you shout something cool when we jump" Gingerale said.

The two ran across the Santa balloon and leapt off Ito the air.

"Something cool!" Cloud screamed.

Jp and Wii Fit Trainer continued to slowly slide down. Stickboy rushed towards them, looking at both again, he reached his hand out and grabbed Jp, lifting her up to the balloon and holding her in his arms. The Wii Fit Trainer amiibo slid off the opposite end and fell. As the amiibo fell to her death the angels sang one final verse.

"So that I could touch ya  
Just so I could touch ya  
Just so I could touch ya  
Just so I could touch ya  
My lovely Wii Fit Trainer"

the amiibo bounced off the group, snapping in two. Lighting struck it and burnt it to a crisp. A horse walked over and pooped on it.

Cloud and Gingerale continued to fall. They moved closer to the mansion.

"We're not going to make it!" Cloud yelled.  
"What are we gonna do with the McDonald's?" Gingerale asked.  
"Stickboy! Catch" Cloud yelled, throwing the bag.

The bag hit Stickboy's face.

Cloud and Gingerale fell below the balloons.

"Let me try to wavedash" Cloud said, trying to wavedash, but instead of moving up he moved further down.

"Shitty" Cloud said.

Cloud and Gingerale smashed against some trees and fell to the ground.

Stickboy and Jp jumped back into the roof. The werewolf snarled at them. Stickboy held of the McDonald's bag as an offering. The werewolf took the bag and sniffed at it. He nodded at Stickboy and returned downstairs.  
Stickboy and Jp slowly walked downstairs. As they walked down some corners, haikuers continued to chant "Is anime real?"

"I thought Reu was the Patient Zero?" Stickboy said.  
"Patient Zero?" Jp asked.

"Is anime real?" the crowd chanted.  
"Is anime real?" the crowd chanted.  
"Is anime real?" the crowd chanted.  
"Is anime real?" the crowd chanted.

Jerry walked out.

"Jerry? Jerry was the Patient Zero!?" Stickboy asked, backing up.  
"Hey guys. Was just looking for some people to hang out with" Jerry said.  
"Shut up Jerry nobody likes you" Alice said.  
"You smell really bad" Isaac said.  
"I like Jerry" Lemon said.  
"Lemon doesn't count because he's gay" Alice said.  
"I'm not FUCKING AROUND. NOW HANG OUT WITH ME!" Jerry pleaded, pulling out some guns.

A bullet was shot in between Jerry's eyes. He fell to the ground, dead.

Sitckboy and Jp turned around, Marrowsky walked forth, blowing the smoke off his shotgun.

"Is anime real?" the crowd continued to chant.  
"It didn't work!" Stickboy screamed.

J walked up to the group.

"Guys! Guys! Hey look, check out my new Asriel icon. Pretty cool, huh?" J asked.  
"Awww" the entire crowd groaned.  
"You don't even play Undertale" Moogle complained.  
"I'm downloading it right now. It's gonna be so fun" J squeezed.  
"Goddammit J way to ruin the fun" Element complained.  
"Undertale isn't fun anymore" Rydli sighed.  
"Katawa Shoujo isn't fun anymore" Marrowsky shot back, defending J.

All of the group dispersed.  
Obama, about to install Undertale, turned his computer off.

"Wait, so is Undertale dead?" Stickboy asked.  
"No, I don't think so. But maybe, people will start talking about it less." Marrowksy said.  
"So, uh, Stickboy. About what you said earlier. You were just fooling around, right? Undertale's real, right?" Jp asked.  
"Uh, hey, let's get back to the library" Stickboy said.

Stickboy, Jp, J, and Marrowksy walked back to the library, Nicholas was waiting for them there.

"Nicholas? Thought you died" Marrowksh said.  
"I got rid of Adam Sandler. His weakness is quirky romantic comedies so I introduced him to Jerry and they're really hitting it off" Nicholas said.  
"Jerry? Isn't that the guy we-" Stickboy started.  
"Moving on. We need to set the trap." Marrowsky said.  
"But we don't have Element's account" Jp said.  
"We'll have to guess the password" Stickboy shrugged.  
"What could it be though!" Nicholas wondered.  
"Let me guess." Marrowsky said, typing on his phone.

"Shinx" he typed in.

"I got in." Marrowsky said.

Marrowksy switched Element's settings so anonymous questions weren't allowed.

"How long could it be before the anon falls for it?" Jp asked.

Somebody crashed through the ceiling fans smashed against the table. If was the hooded figure.

"Is this him? Is this the anon?" Jp asked.

Everyone gathered around the table. More haikuers emerged through the different doors.

"The anon who has been sending us questions all this time is.." Stickboy said, unmasking the person.

It was Dio.

"It was me, Dio!" Dio said.  
"Dio!?" Lemon asked.  
"That's me! I'm Dio! It was me, Dio!" Dio laughed.  
"It all makes sense Dio was a vampire after all" Lemon said.  
"Wait a minute. His reflection is showing. This isn't Dio! This is..." Stickboy said, peeling off the face.

Anon ficguy.

"Holy crap." Alice said.  
"ANON FICGUY? ANON FICGUY!? All this time! All this time!" Isaac shouted, punching a wall.  
"Wait, who's Anom Ficguy?" Gluvr asked.  
"Well we don't know who he is. Just that his Kik username is an anagram of bless is gay and he once asked Cameron for help writing a fic" Lemon explained.  
"So we don't actually know who it is?" Gluvr asked.  
"Well, no. It was Anon Ficguy. We got him. No more bad anon questions guys. We did it!" Lemon cheered.  
"But wake? What was with all those weird cameras?" Robot asked.  
"Oh those were just cameras Lukeguy set up so he could upload everyone's capture to r/watchpeopledie" Imboo explained.

Admin and Imboo walked into the room, slowly clapping.

"No, dude, you can't slow clap with me I gotta do it by myself" Admin said.  
"Sorry" Imboo apologized.

"So, who won?" Jp asked.  
"Well Stickboy outlasted pretty much everyone. But Marrowksy technically didn't get captured either, so I suppose they're both candidates to win" Admin said.  
"Tiebreaker?" Jp asked.  
"Uh, nah. Let them win" Stickboy said.  
"Alright Troll Slaiyers win. Team Jacob you lose" Admin declared.  
"yay" Troll Slaiyers cheered.  
"What the heck? Stickboy what the EFFING HECK IS WROGNWORH UOU?" Nicholas screamed.  
"Idk it just felt like a Troll Slaiyers kind of win lol" Stickboy said.

Adam Sandler slammed through the door.

"Hold on, hold on! Jerry is DEAD." Adam Sandler screamed.  
"Uh oh" Nicholas said.  
"Hey it's Adam Sandler. You like Mortal Kombat for the Sega Genesis?" Riley asked.  
"DONKEY KONG RULES!" Adam Sandler said, picking Riley up and smashing him against a wall.  
"I'm going to decimate you" Adam Sandler said.  
"You know a word like decimate doesn't sound fitting for your personality, Adam Sandler. A word like "harm" would have been more suitable" Nicholas said.

Adam Sandler prepared to attack, but somebody came rushing in.

"Hey daddy. I got an offer for a new Zack and Cody show in Miami so I'm heading out. See ya" Selena Gomez said.  
"What? No. You can't go. I'm not ready to let go" Adam Sandler said.  
"But daddy!" Selena Gomez complained.

All of the haikuers rushed out of the doors of the mansion as they were bickering.

"Zack and Cody and Selena Gomez? Prob alt would have been terrible. Anyways, everyone on the plane! Hurry!" Admin ordered.

All of the haikuers jumped aboard the plane. Reu, Cloud, and Gingerale were dragged on by Faline and Charblar. The plane took off.

The haikuers were sitting around the dining room's table. Anon Ficguy was strapped to his seat.

"So, Anon Ficguy. Why'd you do it?" Cloud asked.  
"I was studying you, learning what you all were like, so I could incorporate it into my new fic. A fic so great it would blow Haiku Drama out of the water! HAHAHAHA!" Anon Ficguy laughed.  
"Nice" Lukeguy said.  
"But little did you know, every other Haiku fic has failed." Imboo said, shaking his head. Smh.  
"Also I just did it because seeing you guys get angry over questions is funny" Anon Ficguy explained.  
"But I would have gotten away with it, if it wasn't for Goku, Shulk, Sebastion from Black Butler, and Hitler..." Anon Ficguy sighed.  
"And so the bad questions will be no more" Element sighed in relief.  
"But what? Who is Anon Ficguy? Shouldn't we unmask him or her right now?" Pantz asked.  
"Hm. Well, I only have enough energy for one mystery today, I'm gonna go sleep instead" Clud said.

The rest of the group dispersed, leaving Anon Ficguy alone.

"Remember, Team Jacob. Vote somebody off! Meet in the elimination room in 10 minutes" Admin announced.

"Hey, Admin. Can you remind me who's on my team again?" J asked.  
"Really, J. Here's a list of your teammates now go pick someone" Admin said, giving him a piece of paper and making him run off.  
"Yo, Admin. Just curious, who's on my team again?" Gingerale asked.  
"Gingerale." Admin said.  
"Hey...is DryBones on my team? Can you tell me who's on my team again?" Isaac asked.  
"One episode, guys. One episode I didn't list all of the losers. I figured you'd get to know your team by now!" Admin complained.  
"Hey Admin. Already made my decision, hope Stickboy fucking dies" Nicholas said, handing Admin Stickboy's passport with a stamp on it.  
"Nicholas! You swore!" Isaac said.  
"Oh fiddlesticks!" Nicholas stomped.

StarForce walked by.

"Oh yeah, StarForce. Have you decided the winner of your drawing yet?" Gingerale asked.  
"Oh, yeah! It was Dez!" StarForce said.  
"What..." Gingerale said.  
"No..." Nicholas said.  
"She doesn't even go here" J yelled from the background, covering his head with his hood.  
"Shit fuck tits. Oh well I just hope she doesn't waste it on Undertale shit" Gingerale said.  
"Oh, she already spent it all. Bought all the Undertale emotes and then bought Undertale for 8 friends." StarForce said, walking away.  
"I'm so mad I'm going to have sex with myself so I won't be mad" Gingerale replied.

[Gingerale in le confession toilet]  
"I think our alliance thing is starting to become more focused. We all know exactly who to vote for. Reu."  
[le end]

[Isaac in le confession toilet]  
"Riley"  
[le end]

[Nicholas in le confession toilet]  
"STICKBOY END YOUR LOOOOOOOOFR"  
[le end]

Team Jacob was sitting throughout the stands as Admin sorted through the passports. Alice, Luke, and Mike sat near the left edge.

"You have to let him go..." Luke said to Alice.

Alice looked over at Riley, who was picking his butt. She then looked down unsurely.

"Get rid of the freaks in your life" Luke continued.

Berserker sat next to Mike, giving him a slap.

"O"

"So, Berk. You seem mad jelly bro" Mike said.

[Mike in le confession toilet]  
"I think Berk may have found out I posted what he said. I regret doing that now..."  
[le end]

"What kind of therapy do I need?" Berserker asked Luke.

Luke narrowed his eyes.

"The type by brothers need" he replied.

[Luke in le confession toilet]  
"Can't believe Berserker found out what we said. I hate when people find out we were talking shit about them"  
[le end]

"Hey, Berserker. You can sit with us if you want" Isaac offered.  
"What is this a High School cafeteria room? Just get the results started" Nicholas insisted.

"Alright, alright, settle down everyfur. After tonight, the remaining haikuers will have made it far enough to not be considered absolute losers. Surviving the first 10 eliminations is only the first step, it only gets harder from here. Getting to the final 20? Moderately good. Final 10? Respectable. But let's face it as long as you aren't the winner you are all equally losers. We started this thing with 40 haikuers, and after tonight only 30 will remain. 15 are already safe, so that leaves you 16. All but one will receive the celebratory Mountain Dew can and be admitted further. Only one of you are unlucky enough to not get one. Who will it be? Well let's find out" Admin said.  
"Um, I'm not allowed to drink soda past 8:30" StarForce raised his hand.  
"Shut up StarForce" Admin said.  
"Oh yeah. By the way, it's time for the...WHEEL...OF...DRAMA!" Admin shouted.

Imboo rolled out the Wheel of Drama as fancy music played and confetti rained.

"The Troll Slaiyers got it last time, so this is your first time in a WoD round. Basically, we spin this wheel, and your team is subjected to whatever it lands on. Team switches, returning players, kooky things!" Admin explained.  
"Just my luck, the only person to get in a Wheel of Drama round two out of two times." Luke said.

Imboob spun the wheel and everyone eyed it as it slowed down, a dinging sound went off as it landed on a slide. Admin picked the card up and read it.

"One player moves to the other team. However, this isn't a switch. Just a move" Admin read.  
"Wow what the fuck" Sam said.

Admin spun the wheel and it rolled through each of the icons of the Team Jacob members. It slowed down and landed on StarForce.

"StarForce, bro. You're a Troll Slaiyer now. Sayonara buddy" Admin said.  
"StarForce? My baby..." Nicholas said.  
"He was a bro...but after letting Dez win that drawing I am okay with this" Gingerale said.  
"Aw, so I don't get to drink soda after my bedtime StarForce asked.

StarForce walked out of the room.

"Now that he isn't here want to talk about him?" Lemon asked.

The team looked around. Riley tried not looking at anyone. Isaac sat close to Gingerale and Nicholas, and J was laughing in the corner as he played on his laptop.

"Surprisingly, Gingerale didn't get any votes tonight. Here's your Mountain Dew" Admin said, tossing it to him.

Gingerale tipped his Charizard hat.

"Oh yeah, this makes me chipper. Gonna jack off to celebrate tonight" Gingerale said.

"Also safe, we have Nicholas, Lemon, Alice, Lukeguy, and Robot" Admin continued, tossing out the cans.

As they all caught their cans, 10 haikuers remained un-dewed.

"Isaac. Sam. You're safe" Admin said, passing them their cans.

"OH YEAAAAAAH" Sam screamed, ripping out of his banana suit and crushing his Mountain Dew can in his hand, the liquid squirted all over Isaac.  
"Gosh! Disgusting!" Isaac said, getting up and wiping it off.

Riley, Robot, Mike, Berserker, Stickboy, Reu, J, and Blooberri remained.

"Oh yeah, Blooberri. I literally forget about you every other minute. You're safe. J and Robot too." Admin said, tossing them cans.

[Blooberri in le confession toilet]  
"It's he past that I can see"  
[le end]

"lol whoops I accidentally killed Toriel and Lesser Dog." J said.  
"J. What?" Admin asked.  
"Idk I thought they would come back like a normal RPG, I wasn't expecting Toriel to actually die haha" J said.  
"J...I'm giving you an extra vote just for that." Admin said, calling back the Mountain Dew can.

Riley, Mike, Berserker, Stickboy, Reu, and J remained.

[Reu in le confession toilet]  
"Nobody voted for me, right? I don't want to go home now..."  
[le end]

Riley looked over at Alice as Luke whispered to her. Berserker slid himself further away from Mike and closer to Nicholas.

"Mike. Berserker. J." Admin said, giving them each a can.

Riley, Stickboy, and Reu were left.

Reu gulped as he began to sweat. Riley looked down and sighed. Stickboy smiled as he looked up.

[Stickboy in le confession toilet]  
"I don't care"  
[le end]

"Reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. U." Admin said, giving him his can.  
"Mm, fresh pepperoni" Reu said as he opened his can.

Riley and Stickboy were left. Riley looked down sadly. Stickboy looked up happy. Rikey turned to Luke.

"Hey, Luke. If, uh, if this is the last time we get to talk, I just want you to know..." Riley said.

"The final can goes..." Admin began.

"I think you're really mature and cool. We had some beef in the past, but I look up to you. And I respect your opinion if you don't want me on the chat anymore." Riley said.

"To.." Admin continued.

":s" Luke replied.

Stickboy yawned.

"Riley!" Admin said, passing the can to him.  
"What? Me? I'm not getting kicked?" Riley yet.  
"Apparently not. But don't get too optimistic I don't see you surviving another 10 episodes" Admin said.  
"What? Me? Oh. Ok lol. At least I wasn't voted off second again" Stickboy said.  
"Stickboy? Stickboy..." Reu said.

"And can I just say what the fuck? Like really. I thought that you would all be used to your teammates by now, but nope. Just about all of you had to ask me who was on your team before voting. Jesus." Admin said.

Stickboy picked up his luggage and strapped on his parachute. Parascout wheeled out his box of amiibo and handed it to him.

"So-"  
"Parascout you are never getting back on the show" Admin said.

Parascout sighed and walked out.

Stickboy began walking towards the door.

"Wait, Stickboy. I want you to have something" Reu said, opening his box to reveal his amiibo collection.  
"Wow nice collection. lol get on my level you only have like 15" Stickboy said.  
"Is every amiibo owner obligated to condescendingly talk about how they have more amiibo than others?" Lemon asked.  
"Yes." Riley answered.

The wind blew Stickboy and Reu's hair about as Reu picked up one of his amiibo.

"I don't have a Wii Fit Trainer, but. Well, I want you to have my Ness" Reu offered, handing him it.  
"I already have one though" Sticky said.  
"I know, but, getting this Ness meant a lot to me. Like I'm sure how much Wii Fit Trainer meant to you. I want this Ness to symbolize our friendship. It'll be there to let you know everything is a-ok" Reu said.  
"Aw, thanks Reu...but, I can't accept this" Stickboy said.  
"!?" Reu replied.  
"I want you to have MY Ness amiibo. To wish you good luck while you're still here. Whenever you get voted off, you can return it to me. But until then, just keep it so things are a-pk" Stickboy said, handing him the McDonald's toy.  
"Wait, or if I win" Reu said.

Stickboy laughed.

"Yeah, so when you lose, give it back to me" Stickboy said, turning for the door.

"Wait, Stickboiiiii" Jp yelled, running across the room.

"Can you hurry up, we will throw you or if this takes longer than 15 seconds" Admin said, tapping his watch.

"Good luck" Stickboy smiled.  
"I'll miss you" Jp said.  
"I'm sure everyone else will too" Stickboy said, and the rest of the room let out a slow "ehhhhhh".

They had a hug and Jp kissed him on the cheek before Stickboy turned for the door once again.

"Oh wait, yeah. Have this gift of remembrance of something" Stickboy said, throwing Jp his Shulk amiibo.  
"Why don't you give everyone on the plane one of your amiibo!" J suggested.  
"No" Stickboy said.

Stickboy's amiibo box slid off the door and flipped over, all of his amiibo rained downwards toward the ground.

"NOOOO! NOOOO!" he shrikes like a 5 year old girl, leaping out of the plane at once.

Imboo walked over, carrying Anon Ficguy. He threw him out of the plane.

"Riley's comment back there was so insincere. He's trying to make himself look professional, but he's really just a freak. We've seen what he's done, just ignore him" Luke advised Alice.  
"Alice, can I talk to you" Riley asked.  
"ok" Alice said, following him out of the room.

[Alice in le confession toilet]  
Alice sighed.  
"He's just going to complain about things again that are his fault"  
[le end]

Alice and Riley leaned against the wall in the storage room, Riley let out a sigh as he looked out into the dark sky.

"Alice. We're still friends, right?" Riley asked.  
"Well, sure. Why?" Alice asked.  
"I don't know, you've been spending a lot of time with these haikuers and I'm starting to feel like our friendship is suffering" Riley said.  
"Come on Riley, we're still friends. Nothing will change that. Sometimes...you just say stupid things, or act like a freak, and you gotta know it's not other people's fau-"  
"Stop using that word! Stop calling people's freaks! I'm not a freak!" Riley yelled.  
"Ok. Look, just calm down" Alice said.  
"Would you choose them over me?" Riley asked.  
"What" Alice asked.  
"Do you consider them better friends than me?" Riley asked.  
"I don't know, I'm not choosin sides. Whenever there's ever an argument I just side with the side I think is right, which 95% of the time isn't you" Alice said.  
"Whatever. We can still hang out and stuff right? You wouldn't ditch me for Luke would you?" Riley asked.  
"Yeah of course. You just gotta remember I see you all the time this world tour is a one time thing to see my internet friends" Alice explained.  
"Fair enough." Riley said.

Riley sighed as he faced the window.

"Alice. I'm thinking about ending GenesisFrenzy." Riley said.  
"What. Why?" Alice asked.  
"I don't know, I lost that spark. I gotta love what I'm doing, and lately it just hasn't been doing it for me. I'm not sure how much longer I want to do this..." Riley said.  
"You live GenesisFrenzy, man. Maybe it's just all this Haiku Drama stuff. It'll come back to you, just take some time off. Let it happen when you're ready" Alice said.  
"Yeah. I guess so. Well, thanks Alice. I guess I'll see you later" Riley said, walking away.

Riley left and Alice sighed, leaving the room too.

"Stupid Riley is so stupid and freakish. And now Berk is annoying me with shit. Wish all these freaks would just did" Luke pouted, pacing back and forth.

Gingerale walked by and noticed Luke in distress.

"Hey, Luke. You seem upset" Gingerale said.  
"I'm just so pissed. Everyone is constantly annoying me. The world is so shitty. Every day I just want to die. When will someone put me out of my misery?" Luke asked.  
"Wait, Luke. Would you say you need some sort of thing to relieve you of your stress?" Gingerale asked.  
"Why are you talking to me aren't you that furry roleplayer trombone player?" Luke asked.  
"I've just been feeling really chipper lately and I need to get to know my teammates better anyways. But that's besides the point. I think I can help you. I know something that can help relieve you of all your stress" Gingerale said.  
":s" Luke replied.

Gingerale brought Luke into the bathroom and shut it tightly behind them.

"What are you...oh...oh...uh...ok...alright...ok...this is kind of weird...wait...oh...wait, what was that...oh...oh yeah...oh yeah...Oh, Oh Yeah. That Feeling. OH. OH YEAH. OH YEAH. AHHHHHHH. OOOOOH. OOOOOOOH. AHHHHHH. ooooo OOOOOOH OOOOOOH YEEEEERAJ" Luke screamed.

A large explosion was heard and Gingerale walked out of the bathroom completely covered in semen. All of the bathroom walls were splattered with cum.

"Anyone else feel fucking awesome? Because I'm feeling chipper" Luke said a she walked out.

Element was scrolling through his feed, but there was nothing there.

" is so bare today" Element said.  
"Well, yeah. That anon sending all of the controversial questions was the only one keeping fresh and relevant. Without him nobody else asks questions" Psuedo said.  
"Oh. Well shit can we get him back?" Element asked, refreshing his page to see if any new questions appeared.

"And here's your prize Troll Slaiyers, a Halloween whopper for all" Admin said, pulling the cart out.

Cloud cried tears of joy.

"It's as black as the darkness in my heart" he said.

The team gathered around to eat some whoppers.

"StarForce go back to your team" Grenade said, pushing him out of the way.  
"Well, actually. I'm on this team now! There was a transfer!" StarForce explained.  
"Wow. Gay" Grenade said.

Rydli took a bite out of his whopper.

[le flashback]  
The plane titled downwards as it began its descent, the amiibo started rolling down the floor. It smashed against the wall and stopped rolling.

"WAIT! NO!" Stickboy screamed, falling out of his seat, all of his amiibo toppled out of his box and onto the floor. Stickboy collected himself and ran towards his Wii Fit Trainer.

Rydli stepped out of the shadows and placed his foot on the Wii Fit Trainer amiibo, kicking it closer to the door.

As Stickboy neared it, the amiibo wobbled a bit, then slipped out the door of the plane, flying downwards. Rydli walked back into the shadows so Stickbou couldn't see him.  
[back to me future (now)]

[Rydli in le confession toilet]  
"Hm. This whopper...it kinda makes me feel like I'm forgetting something" Rydli said.  
[le end]

Back in Milwaukee, a girl emerged from the car. Lana pants heavily as she looked over landscape. She had eaten the other girls.

"Rydli...RYDLI!" Lana screamed, picking up a pitchfork and running down the road.

The camera pans over to inside the warehouse. The rope attached to the corner where Luke's brother was tied up remain, but Luke's brother is nowhere to be seen.

End of Day 122  
End of Phase 1  
Initiation at 26.32%  
30 haikuers remain

9-14 / 20-8-9-19 / 23-15-18-12-4 / 9-20 / 9-19 / 11-9-3-11-5-4 / 9-20 / 2-5 / 11-9-3-11-5-4  
eno drawrof gnivom trats


	12. A Canadian Furry in London

Chapter 11: A Canadian Furry In London

It was another normal day on the plane holding the haikuers.

"Minions SUCK. Minions did 9/11. Minion yaoi. Kill me. TOASTWOLF WATCHED CAILOU GOES TO THE ABORTION CLINIC." Carz screamed.  
"Hey guys it's me Jp" Jp said.  
"No. King Dedede delivers the Kirby triple deluxe at 9. Fuck." Carz screamed.  
"Post from /b/" Shinxy said.  
"Well that about wraps up everything this team posts on a daily basis" Pseudo said.

In the eatery, several haikuers were sitting at the table to enjoy a nice meal of breakfast. Nicholas sat on one side, across from Element, Moogle, and Marrowsky. Gingerale approached the table with Lukeguy by his side.

"Oh hey it's Lukeguy. Why." Nicholas exclaimed.  
"Me and Lukey have been pretty tight ever since I showed him how to relieve his stress." Gingerale explained as they sat down.

[Gingerale in le confession toilet]  
"I don't know why but I've just been feeling so chipper lately. I just wanted to spread my chips with those feeling down. Besides, doesn't hurt to be on other people's good side"  
[le end]

"Yeah, Gingerale showed me how to feel chipper. Pretty nice of him. More than I can say for the kikes" Luke said.  
"Oh. Did they mistreat you again?" Element asked.

Lukeguy started sniffling.

"Well...well...they made a new group without me in it, and called me mean, and and won't talk to me about what happened, they've been treating me so harshly and honestly I just wish they'd be straight with me" Luke sniffled.  
"You don't need them, Luke. You're better than Haikik." Element said supportively.  
"Thanks guys, I know where my real friends are..." Luke said.

Marrowsky eyed Lukeguy with a straight expression.

"Maybe they just can't take someone as honest as you, Lukeguy." Moogle suggested.  
"Oh yeah, I'm pretty badass. I'm not afraid to give The Truth. That's all I'm about, I'm an iron hearted analysis machine-  
"He said anal..." Element whispered.  
"Who gives the facts and isn't afraid to rip on anyone" Luke said confidently.  
"Really. Lukeguy, you should lay down some sick disses" Nicholas said.  
"Yeah, I can do that. I don't get offended by anything so I'm not afraid of any negative feedback I may get, just how badass I am. Rydli, for example. Full of himself, douche. Loves asserting his superior qualities to everyone on a daily basis" Lukeguy said.  
"Wow Rydli hate, that's never been said before" Nicholas admired.  
"Oh and Nicholas. The little boy who rules over his friend from the Internet. Pretentious little shit, unfunny kid who still thinks being ironic is funny and being mean to others is alright if you justify it. Element doesn't mind that though, he's ok with anything Nicholas does. Element's just a sheep, always following what his friends say and never against breaking apart his former friendships" Luke continued.  
"Whoa wait what" Element asked.  
"We have Marrowsky here, Rydli 0.5. Thinks he's all that, thinks he's smart and buff, just another kid who thinks he's smart if he belittles others" Luke continued.

Marrowsky stopped eating his casadia to lock eyes with Lukeguy.

"Moogle? Well at least he has real life endeavors. Other than that he's pretty lame, has dry humor, and loves being a wiseass. Gluvr is just an idiot. Naomi's problems suck, think I'm just going to block em so I don't have to listen to them anymore. Red's a freak. Speaking of dumb girls, you know who else makes dumb posts? Luna, she-"  
"Hey. Lukeguy. You're being kind of a dick." Marrowsky interrupted.

Everyone turned to Marrowsky. Lukeguy gasped, dropping his kitchen utensils.

"And so then, I was just giving my opinion on people, which they asked for. And they called me a, they called me a dick, and now they're all excluding me from their friend group. It's like they WANT me to stop posing on haiku. Those kids are so ruthless and only care about each other" Luke sniffled.  
"It's ok, Luke. You don't need them. You should just spend time with people who care about you. Not mean-spirited fools who will attack anyone that's different from them" Alice said supportively, patting Luke's back.

They sat on the bench, other teammates spread across the room were occupied with their own business.

"They always do this. What's the point of posting on haiku if they're all just going to ignore me and only pay attention to Element?" Luke asked.  
"I don't know, man. They're just assholes. I don't see why they're so inclined to dislike you, you're much more thought provoking than them." Alice shrugged.

Berserker walked up.

"Hey. I was wondering-"  
"Go away freak we're talking" Luke brushed off.

Berserker walked away.

"Hey, I know what will cheer you up. How about we talk about your novel. It's almost done right?" Alice asked.  
"Yes. It has some pretty deep and psychological themes that delve into the identity of each of the characters and how their ethnicity designates their role, I hope it enlightens my readers that it's ok to seek irrational emotions and inspires them" Luke said.

Sam let out a large fart as J flicked his lighter. Robot was engulfed in the flame ignited by Sam's fart and screamed as she ran into a wall.

"Let's staple some condoms to her while she's asleep" J laughed.  
"That'll show her" Sam agreed.

"Kids and their Edgy play..." Luke rolled his eyes.  
"What's the matter?" Alice asked.  
"This always happens. Everybody ignores me but they all eat up the shitty and explicit antics of the other haikuers. Being raped by skeletons? Replacing dildos with dragon penises? Fapping on amiibo?" Luke began.  
"Actually the plural is still amiibo" Reu corrected from across the room, to which Luke ignored.  
"This show has gone Over the Edge, and I think we should just go back to our humble beginnings where we had normal adventures back on the island" Luke suggested.  
"Hey who are you calling humble, bitch? Bitch!?" Sam shouted.

Sam ran over to Luke and unzipped his Pantz, releasing his urine all over him.

[Luke in le confession toilet]  
"This is becoming more like home every day"  
[le end]

Luke started shaking with anger in his seat. He clenched his fist as be watched the other haikuers being assholes by liking each other.

"Luke, you ok? You look like you're in distress" Alice noted with concern.

Luke gritted his teeth.

"Luke! Luke! Here, let's talk more about your novel, that will cheer you up, right?" Alice asked.

Luke eased up as he enough of his novel.

"Mm...yes...such distinct characters, such subtle jokes...very good plot...that satisfying end, and the intellectual themes...so...so good..." Luke moaned to himself.

Luke excused himself and ran into the barroom.

"OH YEAH, OOOOOOOH. oooooooh, AAAAAAH OH YEAAAAAAH" Luke screamed.

Lukegirl walked out of the bathroom with a chipper smile.

Gingerale moved closer to Nicholas.

"Alright Nick, it's time we start getting serious" Gingerale said.  
"Gingerale? Are you talking about our relationship?" Nicholas asked.  
"Look, dude. We lost Element. Then Moogle. Now StarForce. STARFORCE! It's just you and me, now, we can't slack off anymore" Gingerale said.  
"Slack off? We basically won the last two challenges. And we still have J." Nicholas said.  
"And me" Isaac said, sitting right next to them.  
"Oh yeah and Naomi." Nicholas added.  
"Do you guys have an alliance of something?" Marrowsky asked.  
"Stop invading our privacy, Marrowsky. Go jack off J or something" Gingerale said, waving him goodbye.  
"It's a public table. And I need to finish my breakfast, it's the most important mean of the day." Marrowsky informed.  
"You have first class service! Why would you eat in this crappy kitchen mess hall eatery dining room cafeteria thing?" Gingerale asked.  
"I'll be right back, I'm going to get some water" Element said, standing up and walking away.  
"You would you weirdo" Gingerale teased.  
"I wonder how my little Shinxy is doing..." Nicholas wondered.

Shinxy laid upside down surrounded by feces as he slept snugly in his seat.

"Shinxy it's been almost two weeks do you think you want to move from that yet?" StarForce asked.  
"Nah" Shinxy said.  
"Well Shinxy you should get some exercise, or something. You're going to be very unfit for the challenge..." StarForce exclaimed.  
"Eh" Shinxy replied.  
"You'll get used to it." Pseudonym advised StatForce from a nearby seat.

[Cloud in le confession toilet]  
"Still can't believe they let STARFORCE on our team. He is NOT a true Troll Slaiyer. But whatever, as the team captain it's my duty to keep him on his best"  
[le end]

"Alright Force. That's your name now. Now that I say that I feel inclined to make a pun relating to the new Star Wars but I'm not a nerd so I won't. As the team captain, I-"  
"We never agreed to captains" Rydli said.  
"Dude. Bro. I'd make a pretty sick captain, you gotta admit" Cloud said.  
"It wouldn't work, Cloud. The power would go to your head and you would start looking down on the rest of the team as if you're better than them. Honestly, a democracy type of team just flat out works better." Rydli explained.  
"Me? Looking down on others? What do you think I am, a cloud?...shit" Cloud said.

"Hello, my beloved haikuers" Admin greeted, walking into the room.  
"Are we landing soon? Where are we heading? Japan?" DryBones asked eagerly.  
"DryBones if you ask if we're going to Japan one more time I will deliberately wait until the episode after you're eliminated to go there" Admin warned.  
"Gosh dang it!" DryBones snapped his fingers.  
"Troll Slaiyers, Team Jacob, gather around. I have an announcement to make" Admin announced.

Team Jacob filed into the room, guided by Imboo.

"Today's location was selected because of special circumstances. You see, I-"  
"I'd like to make a complaint about my treatment on this show" Luke interrupted.  
"Why would you interrupt me like that? Are t you supposed to be socially inept why would you speak so openly?" Admin asked.  
"Exactly. I feel like this show is trying to make me look bad and only capture my negative attributes. It's so unrealistic" Luke rolled his eyes.  
"Right. I don't care. So anyways, I selected this place because I was able to-"  
"You know, just saying, my portrayal is pretty shit. If this was realistic I would be back to my intellectual analytical roots and wouldn't just be complaining about everything and spouting edgy crap" Luke continued.  
"I don't care. WE are going to London, because in London, they have-"  
"You're an idiot." Luke continued.  
"Luke! Shut up! Just shut up!" Admin complained.  
"What are you gonna do? Kick me? Do it, freak. Do it. Kick me off the plane. KICK ME. Put me or of my misery!" Luke yelled.

Admin ran over towards Luke to kick him but something jumped out from behind Luke. Admin missed the kick and accidentally modded Luke as he was tackled by Luke's brother.

"Nani!?" Alice asked.

Luke's brother pounded on Admin's chest and smecked him repeatedly.

"What the hell. I thought I left you to die" Luke says as she collected herself.  
"He must have been hiding on the plane." Imboo scratched his head.  
"Well are we going to get rid of him?" Luke asked.

Admin threw Puke out of the plane.

"Alright that's over with" Admin said.  
"How do you accidentally mod someone trying to kick them?" Element asked.  
"I slipped up ok. Geez" Admin sighed.  
"Whoa whoa whoa, wait. If they get to have an admin on their team, we should have one too. It's only fair" Cloud suggested.  
"No, Luke wasn't supposed to be promoted. I'm just going to have to ask him to respectfully demote himself" Admin said.  
"What? And leave you in charge of this place. I'll keep this place in top condition" Luke said.  
"Literally all an admin has to do is kick trolls don't act like you have some huge entitled role" Admin complained.  
"This seems like a personal issue, can we just get to the challenge already?" Pseudonym asked.  
"Wait, wait. A Troll Slaiyer should be mod too! Mod me! Mod me, bro! Bro!" Cloud jumped up and down.  
"Ok FINE. Cloud you can be an admin." Admin said.  
"Well that isn't fair, why can't I be the admin?" Moogle asked.  
"It's not going to affect your experience at all it just increases your ego" Admin explained.  
"I know, but, it comes with a crown and it looks really nice..." Moogle said.  
"Let's just drop this. We should be landing soon. We're going to London. Why? I got tickets to Star Wars! It comes out a day earlier in London, so I had to make sure I would be here" Admin explained.  
"It comes out today in the U.S. too" Mr. Moogle said.  
"What?" Admin asked.  
"Yeah there are early screenings starting at 7 and stuff. In fact, it came out yesterday in some other countries. I think France was one of them" Moogle explained.  
"Well, we can't go to France...they have...stuff going on. It doesn't matter where or when it came out, I got tickets for London. And if you win this challenge, I'll let you see it with me tonight" Admin offered.

There was some excited chatter among the haikuers.

[Riley in le confession toilet]  
"Wow that's so cool. I'd totally fuck Rey if presented the opportunity"  
[le end]

[Lukegirl in le confession toilet]  
"Star Wars? Star Wars is like, my life. I thought I wouldn't be able to see the new one for like 1,000,000 more years. I gotta see this. What's this feeling inside me? It feels warm, is this...joy?"  
[le end]

[Alice in le confession toilet]  
"Never seen one"  
Alice shrugs.  
[le end]

"So that's the big prize?" Pantz asked.  
"Yeah. Pretty cool, huh?" Admin replied with a smile.  
"You're basically telling us we would have seen it, but we don't actually see it." Pantz said.  
"Pantz stop smoking weed" Admin ordered.

The plane descended and neared the ground. A bunch of haikuers gazed out some windows to look over the many buildings encompassing London.

"Dis looks liek it's Gon be a good show, eh chappy govnor?" Isaac asked.  
"Never speak in that accent ever again." Nicholas commanded.

Imboo threw a bunch of parachutes at everyone.

"We're dropping in. Have fun" Imboo said.

"DURRRRR. DUUUUUURRRRRRR." Puke shouted, tying him and Luke together with the parachute.

Shinxy held his parachute upside down, scratching his head as he put it on his dick.

"Need some help, Shinxy?" Nicholas asked, walking towards him.  
"Nope. Sorry Nick, I'm tired of the team's mingling with each other. Stick to your own team" Admin ordered.  
"What's wrong with mingling?" Jp asked.  
"It had come to my attention that most of you still don't know who your teammates are" Admin explained.  
"That's so whack" J said as he stood with the Troll Slaiyers.  
"What do you think we are, idiots? Of course we know our teammates" Gingerale defended.  
"Name 5 teammates that aren't Nicholas, J, and Isaac." Admin requested.  
"Well. There's...definitely Reu. Reu is one. There's also Lukeguy, we became aquatinted in the restroom. Then there's...that guy, and his friend. They both use Haikik along with their other friend, who is a girl. I think." Gingerale said.

Isaac giggled.

"How about you, Isaac? Can you name 5? And you can't use Reu and Luke, Gingerale just said then" Admin requested.  
"Sure. There's Lemon. He's quite comical and amiable. Who can forget Riley? Most of you, that's why I asked that. Then there's Alice. She likes video games. And I'm pretty sure DryBones is a charmer, along with the rest" Isaac said.  
"Thanks. You can also call me "The Dood" 2001." DryBones informed.  
"Do any of you know your teammates?" Admin asked annoyed.  
"Sam, Robot, Blooberri, Berserker, and Mike. Can we move on now? Nicholas asked.  
"You guys suck, you need to bond with the rest of your team more" Admin suggested.

"Hey do you want to quiz us on our teammates?" Jp asked excitedly.  
"What's the point only like two of you vote at eliminations anyways. Now strap your parachutes on and jump out" Admin ordered.

"This looks so cool! I'm going jump out while listening to Sanbika and pump my firsts in the air!" J said ecstatically, leaping out the door parachute in hand.

Blooberri and Berserker looked down at the streets below as they prepared to jump.

"Hope my parachute doesn't fail...that would be scary..." Berserker said.  
"You'll be fine. Most people die before they even hit the ground" Blooberri said with a supportive pat on the back.  
"What...well where do they go?" Betserker asked.

Blooberri didn't respond and stood quietly before jumping out a moment after, followed by Berserker.

Isaac looked down nervously. Sam kicked him out of the plane as he leaped out next.

"OH YEAH EXTREME" Sam shouted as he activated his parachute, flying directly into a building and tearing his parachute. Sam plunged down and crashed off the ground, bouncing back up 50 feet before falling once more.

Pseudonym slowly landed by him.

Lemon and Ziggy descended near each other. Ziggy was wearing a loli shirt.

"Nice shirt, Ziggy. Got anything with Osaka on it?" Lemon asked.

Cloud flew by and kicked Lemon out of the way.

"Don't communicate with Ziggy, Lem. He'll conform you to the weebs..." Cloud warned.

The kick knocked Lemon off balance and he crashed into some water.

"Frick you Cloud 9. Or should I say Cloud Gay. Because you're gay. And like being gay." Ziggy teased.  
"Oh no you didn't bitch!" Cloud shouted.

Ziggy and Cloud slapped each other repeatedly, grunting after each slap.

"You're like the epitome of gay, dude. Sorry but you need to get a life!" Cloud said.  
"Kys" Ziggy requested.  
"No u" Cloud shot back.  
"Damn that was a pretty solid comeback" Ziggy admitted.

Cloud and Ziggy landed on a street.

"You're so gay, dude" Cloud said.  
"How" Ziggy asked.  
"We'll do you jack off?" Cloud asked.  
"Well yeah but that's to anime lolis..." Ziggy said.  
"But what do you do when you jack off?" Cloud asked.  
"...I jack off, are you unfamiliar with the process?" Ziggy asked.  
"Well I was two years ago but that's irrelevant now. The point is, when you jack off, you touch your weewee. What does that mean? You like touching dick. Who likes touching dick? Gay people. Therefore, sorry to say, but you're a raging faggot dude" Cloud explained.

Ziggy's mouth gapped open.

[Cloud in le confession toilet]  
"Holy shit Ziggy is SO GAY. I'm going to write a fanfiction where we fuck each other to prove how gay he is"  
[le end]

Nicholas landed and Joe flew directly into him.

"Oh hey Nicholas. Fancy meeting you here..." Joe greeted.  
"Oh hi Noe. It's hour jut Nicky nOck with the fresh beats to! Haha!" Nick jumped off the body ain't into the water.

Luke landed next, followed by Alice and Mike. Riley plopped down shortly after, landing face first onto the pavement.

"That was nice. That footage will look great on my YouTube channel GenesisFrenzy" Riley said.

The rest of the haikuers soon followed. Element's fedora landed elegantly on his head.

"Whoa, this place looks so...British." Isaac exclaimed.

A double decker bus ran over Sam.

Carz screamed.

"Minions suck!" Carz shouted.  
"Alright Carz, the whole minion thing is getting a bit old, dude" Mr. Moogle said.  
"Just let him play it out. He will get over it" Grenade insisted.  
"Join my minion hate group" Carz requested.  
"Ehh I really want the minions to just die now. Both the minion and minion hate are pretty annoying." Element said.  
"It's not like this will matter a year from now. Carz will just move onto a completely different shitpost genre and minions will be irrelevant." Pseudo said.

"Alright everyone, let's go get tortured" Admin said, leading the crowd into a building.

"Kill all minions" Carz shouted.  
"Carz, dude, shut up. Nobody cares about minions. Geez" Element complained.  
"It'll pass, Element. You can't think of any other meme that you thought was the most cancerous thing on earth a year ago, but ended up just dying out and being replaced like all the others?" Pseudonym asked.  
"Hm. Nope. Pretty sure minions are just the worst thing though" Element said.

Team Jacob and the Troll Slaiyers walked into the Tower of London.

At an unknown destination, a crouched figure looked downwards. The entire room was pitch black, leaving only him and his frontside viewable.

"Nothing will stand in our way." he spoke with a metallic voice.

The camera panned over to reveal Darth Doge's fractured skull. The skull bore many cracks from its wariness, its entire structure seemingly sunken in on itself.

"I will finish, what you started."

Everyone walked into the room I'll of torturing touring devices.

"Looks like this challenge will include torturing" Lukeguy noted.  
"Yeah no shit" Berserker replied.

Lukeguy looked at Berk with Sprite. He took a hammer out of his pocket and whacked Berk with it, making Berserker fly out of the building and onto the London streets.

"That felt good. I like this thing" Luke said, paddling the hammer on his hand.

"Hey wait, what happened to Berserker?" Blooberri asked.

Admin sighed.

"Technically he's been removed from the team." Admin explained.  
"What the. Dude let my bro Berk back in! I'll kill your family if you don't" Riley threatened.

Lukeguy whacked Riley with his hammer and Riley flew out of the building.

[Riley in le confession toilet]  
"What the? OBVIOUSLY I WAS JOKING GUYS LIKE JESUS SHIT"  
[le end]

"I really like this thing" Luke admitted.  
"Bet that makes you feel very powerful, eh Lukeguy?" Nicholas asked.

Luke whacked Nicholas next, sending him out of the building.

"Whoa dude. You kilt Nicholas' MIAHOCLCNl" Gingerale screamed before being struck by Lukeguy's hammer and thrown out of the building.

"Remember everyone, this team has one key policy: anyone I don't like isn't allowed" Luke explained.  
"What? But what if the rest of the team likes them?" Isaac asked.  
"It doesn't matter. The thing about being in charge is that everything revolves around you. Basic ethics and moral principles are irrelevant. Everyone must condone to your preferences. So just deal with it and accept that these Freaks aren't needed" Lukeguy said.  
"I agree with Luke" Alice said.  
"I have to say Alice has been pretty mature lately. You've been making some pretty nice sentences, like wow, Alice you really get me. We're on the same page" Luke complimented.

"So uh, the challenge?" Pseudonym asked.  
"Oh yeah, right. So yeah, this challenge benefits from having as many players as possible" Admin began.

Team Jacob looked around and sighed.

"So, for this challenge you will need to blah blah blah, blah blah blah blah blah, blah blah blah"

Shinxy zoned out and Admin's words flew out of his mind. He looked over at Element, standing next to him, and tried to work up the courage to talk to him. He had to think of something casual to bring up. A good conversation starter. But what?

"What's your favorite/most visited board on 4chan? mine's obvious - w-" Shinxy asked him.  
"the only one I ever even go on is /vp/

and I don't know why it's always awful" Element replied.  
"Shinxy, Element. I'm talking here! Now as I was saying, blah blah, blah blah blah" Admin continued.

"So we have to submit ourselves to various torture devices, and once our team collectively reaches a certain amount of pain we win? Sounds simple enough" Pseudonym said.  
"What kind of torture devices? Like Element's taste in music?" Marrowsky asked.

Admin introduced the haikuers to the various torturing devices throughout the room.

[Lukeguy in le confession toilet]  
"Finally, a challenge I can get behind"  
[le end]

"Sam is pretty strong, he should endure a lot of the pain for us" Robot suggested.  
"Sorry bro, broke my back back there. After my parachute tore I don't even want to think about doing torture" Sam said.  
":s useless kid" Luke said, slamming Sam with his hammer.  
"Get on there Lukeguy, I'm Isaac and this line has always been here" Isaac said, strapping Lukeguy onto a rack. Isaac took Luke's shoes off and tied his hands and feet to the machine, then tugged hard on it. Lukeguy was stretched from both directions, the pain brought him joy as his body started to crack.

"So, uh. How should we decide who goes? Rock Paper Scissors?" StarForce asked.

Pseudo pushed StarForce into the rack and wheeled it. StarForce screamed as his hands and feet were stretched out.

"Man it's too bad Nicholas isn't here. He'd love this" Element sighed.  
"Nicholas? Eh, he's clingy ehhhhh ehh ahhhh cringey nigger eh..." Shinxy said.

Lukeguy winced as he continued to stretch. Luke struggled to break free. Alice released him and Luke fell off the rack.

"You're all childish freaks who need to Grow Up and get out of my life" Luke shouted, walking away.

Luke walked back in a few seconds later.

"By the way, I made this new Mario Maker level and I think it's really cool and interesting you should check it out...probably won't though because you're hipsters who think Undertale is too mainstream..." Luke said.  
"Shut up Luke." Element rolled his eyes.  
"Oh what do you have against me, asshole? Why can't we be friends anymore, Element? You just seem to be out for me, don't you" Luke defended himself.  
"Lukeguy you hate literally all of the people you used to like" Element said.  
"No." Luke replied

[le flashback]

Lukeguy in 2013

"Berserker is pretty underrated. His posts are cute and he has interesting thoughts on Adventure Time, he's just honestly good at being a fan. He deserves to be more appreciated"

Lukeguy in 2015

"Berserker is a freak who rambles about the dumbest shit and has no social skills whatsoever. He needs help with his autism"

Lukeguy in 2013

"Bless has a unique sense of humor and an interesting taste in music. His Mexican background resonates with me and his self-awareness is appreciative."

Lukeguy in 2015

"Bless is an edgy retard who thinks ironic humor is still funny and sill makes unfunny racist remarks in hope of getting a reaction out of someone. He's never going to succeed in life and his cold heart makes him a waste of a human being."

Lukeguy in 2013

"Me and Element have a lot in common. He's the anti-me. Both homeschooled and unable to experience real life situations, I can understand where he's coming from and emphasize with him. I always feel bad when others make fun of him, I'll always consider him one of my best friends"

Lukeguy in 2015

"Element is a sheep who believes whatever Nicholas and Moogle says and never speaks for himself. He uses his homeschool condition as an excuse not to be social and gain intelligence, and his blinded hatred towards Haikik makes him not onto a dick but an idiot"

[le end]

"You all changed for the worse it's not my fault you freaks never grew up" Luke defended  
"Luke? What's wrong?" Alice asked.  
":s what isn't wrong? You know what, I'm sick of my treatment. You ever notice how we all get portrayed as idiots all the time? Why are we always getting shit on like this? It's like only our negative attributes are shown" Luke complained.  
"Maybe you just don't have any positive attributes" Robot suggested.  
":s this is what I'm talking about. My portrayal is shit. Why can't I be the cunning analytical man I was in the past...this show just isn't the same anymore. All it is is pointed criticism towards us" Luke complained.  
"Actually I think we're fine it looks like it's just you" Lemon said.  
"Like I said we are all being mistreated and I'm sick of it. I don't want to do this anymore." Luke sighed.  
"What do you mean? What else are we supposed to do?" Alice asked.  
"What we always do when we come across people we don't like that we can't get rid of." Luke said.  
"Bail?" Alice asked.  
"Bail." Luke said.

Luke and Alice dropped everything and walked out of the building.

The rest of the team followed.

"Hold on wait, why can't we stay here and keep the team alive? Why do we all have to follow Luke and Alice?" Lemon asked.  
"We don't have minds of our own it's easier to just do whatever they say" J shrugged, following them.

Team Jacob left.

"So. That happened. Can we go see Star Wats how?" Pseudonym asked.  
"What the...they...they can't just leave. What the actual heck!" Admin stomped.  
"Who cares the show always gets better when it's down to only a few haikuers anyways" Imboo said.  
"Alight guys, to Star Wars!" Pseudo said excitedly.

The Troll Slaiyers all cheerfully ran out of the tower.

"Maybe Luke was right, though. He was kind of getting the short end of the stick back there. This show never had characters that got full on criticized with no redeeming qualities before" Grenade said.

"Oh hey guys" Svenguyi greeted.  
"Svenguyi!" everyone said in unison except for StarForce who fucked it up and delayed it by a second.  
"Damn it, StarForce" Cloud cloud cloudcomplained.  
"Lucas? What are you doing here?" Kirby asked.  
"I got tickets to Star Wars and I saw some haikuers near the theater. Have you guys had another season going on? WITHOUT ME? WHAT THE FUCK I'M GOING TO KILL YOU ALL" Svenguyi screamed.  
"We didn't plan to exclude you it all started at Haikucon" Kirby explained.  
"wait that actually happened and more than 3 people showed up? WHAT THE FUCK! Anyways how's it goin everyone ^_^" Svenguyi shouted.  
"Oh Svengali! I remember her" StarForce said.

The streets went quiet and no one talked.

"what did you just say?" Svenguyi asked.  
"What?" StarForce asked.

"We're going to miss the movie let's just go.." Pseudonym said, slipping out from the team with Marrowsky.

"Did you. Just call me. A she?" Svenguyi asked.  
"Uh, well. Maybe it was a slip, hehe, sorry, I'm not quite-"  
"BECAUSE I'M NOT A FUCKING GIRL UOU TWAT I'M A DUDE" Svenguyi screamed.  
"Hey, hey, everyone calm down. StarForce means no quarrel" Rydli said, separating the two.

Svenguyi looked into Rydli's eyes and they sparkles. Rydli winked and flipped his hair in slow motion.

"Oh. Hey there..." Svenguyi said.  
"Wait. You're a guy. Shouldn't you be attracted to girls?" StarForce asked.  
"You have something against gays, bro? You wanna stop talking out of your prepubescent agenderphobic asshole, bitch?" Svenguyi asked, punching StarForce in the eye.

Marrowsky, Pseudonym, and Element were at the theater entrance.

"Hey we're here to see The Force Awakens" Pseudonym said.  
"Ehhh?" the British guy asked.  
"The Force Awakens. Star War Episode 7. We got tickets." Marrowksy said.  
"Ehhhh? Wooooot?" The British guy asked.  
"Let me try. Bloody hell, mate. We Yanks got tickets to the Star Wars, we do. Can we bloody get in?" Element asked.  
"Oh, Star Wars fans, eh? Right this way." The British guy said, leading them to a line.  
"This is so hype..." Pseudonym said.  
"Yeah. Haha. Pretty hype. Would be awful if someone were to...spoiler it for you..." someone standing in front of the three said.  
"What...dude I've been avoiding the Internet all month in preparation for this, don't freakin ruin it" Pseudo said.  
"Sorry, sorry. But, you know. Kylo Ren i-"

Pseudo held his finger in a shape of a gun towards the man.

"Not one more word. You know the ending of Fallout 4?" Pseudo asked.  
"Yes, actually. It's a meme." the man replied.  
"How about the ending of Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Road Chip?" Pseudo asked.  
"You wouldn't dare..." the man said, holding his hands out in defense.  
"Nobody says anything. Nobody gets spoiled. We all go home happy. Not one more word." Pseudonym said.

Pseudo and the man stated at each other before putting their finger hands down.

"You seem pretty keen on avoiding spoilers, kid. Let me give you a tip. Some of you are alright, don't go on iFunny tomorrow." the man warned.  
"Why would I go on iFunny period?" Pseudonym asked.  
"If you know what's good for you, don't go on iFunny..." the man warned.  
"I wasn't going to regardless" Pseudo said.  
"Don't go on iFunny" the man reminded him.  
"You telling me not to go on iFunny isn't making me want to go on iFunny" Pseudo insisted.  
"This is going to be a long line" Element sighed.

Lukeguy, Robot, Isaac, Reu, J, Mike, Alice, and Lemon were walking as far away from Haiku Drama as possible.

"Thanks for including me in one of your adventures guys" Robot thanked.  
":s" Lukeguy said, whacking Robot with his hammer.  
"At least we'll never have to deal with them again" Luke said.  
"Element...Nicholas...Rydli...Bless...Poe...Berk...and of course, the biggest asshole of them all. Cameron. Thank God he was killed." Luke said.

Lemon and Isaac exchanged a nervous glance.

"Wait. Luke. I think...Cameron's still alive out there" Isaac said.

Luke stopped walking.

"...alive? My foe? My foe, Cameron?" Luke asked.  
"Oh and apparently Svenguyi is back" Lemon said.  
"How do you know?" Reu asked.  
"We can hear him from 20 miles away" Lemon said.  
"Cameron...no. No. No! NOOOO! He's going to ruin my life! This isn't enough. I'll have to separate from you guys as well." Luke said, running off.  
"Luke! Wait!" Alice yelled, running after him.

Alice chased Luke down, the rest of the team waited back.

"So. Like. Is having a team without Luke and Alice in charge an option?" Reu asked.  
"No they'll just her stubborn and leave" Lemon said.  
"Well. There are two of them. And the rest of the team is like 12 people. We can overrule them and decide someone else should be in charge." Reu said.  
"Too much work it's easier to follow everything they say and never disagree with any of their choices" Lemon brushed Reu off.

Luke stopped running. He started panting as Alice caught up to him.

"Luke? Come on. We'll just do what we always do when we come across people we don't like, block them out of our group and force everyone else to feel the same way about them as we do. We can do this" Alice said.  
"No. Alice, I can't. People will just make fun of me. And I'm tired of it. I just want to be alone. Figure things out." Luke said  
"Luke you're like the smartest person I know. You're too good to let their words get to you. Don't be hard on yourself" Alice said supportively.  
"No, Alice. No matter what, I'll never be anything. I'm destined for a life of failure and ridicule. I try to act smart and analytical, but let's face it. Deep down, I'm just a [post removed by moderator]." Luke said.  
"I just want to be alone so I can rethink all of the things I said today and :s at them and then tell everyone how badly written it was" Luke said, walking away.

Alice looked down and closed her eyes.

[Alice in le confession toilet]  
"Man. I just wish there was someone to cheer Luke up. But who could possibly connect with him? Who is someone Luke used to admire?"  
[le end]

A campfire roared. Next to it, a ROB robot laid, radiated by the fire. The fire fiercely blew as the British haikuer next to the robot rested his aesthetic prosthetic hand on ROB.

"What up guys, we're here in London for the premiere of Star Wars: The Force Awakens with, JONATHAN HANCOCK!"  
"Hello"  
"That's his real name. He just told it to me and I can't believe it, it's SO cool. How are you?"  
"I basically wrote the constitution" Element replied.  
"He wrote the constitution. Everyone should just come on down and get his signature cause, this guy" the interviewer said, clicking her tongue as she pointed towards Element.

The interviewer walked over to Marrowsky and Pseudonym.

"Wait, was it the constitution? Never mind, never mind..." Element thought to himself.

"You guys Star Wars fans?" the interviewer asked.  
"No we're just here because our tickets were already paid for" Pseudonym said.  
"Wow, that's so cool. This movie has a lot of hype. You guys hyped?" the interviewer asked.  
"Yes." Marrowsky replied.  
"Hey! Hey! Yeah! I'm at the theater right now! Yeah! Yeah? Can you hear me?" someone screamed.

Pseudonym and Marrowksy turned around to see a fat man wearing a cowboy hat and a Star Wars shirt shouting into his phone.

"Im so excited for Star Wars! Yeah! Hey! Haha!" he laughed.  
"Are you using FaceTime?" Musky Husky asked.  
"Huh? Oh no. I'm using text to speech on my phone. It's so cool and revolutionary! Some of my words aren't going through though" The man explained.  
"It's so cool? It's SO cool!" The interviewer repeated.  
"Don't you think using text to speech in this kind of environment is a bit...stupid" Marrowsky suggested.  
"Aaaaaaaaaah Star Wars pew pew haha Star Wars I'm so excited" the fat man shouted, taking his shirt off and whipping it around.  
"You know with all this hype about the movie there's a lot of rumors going about. They're saying that Princess Leia-"  
"No. NOOOOOOO! Don't say another word. I don't want to hear anything, I need to go into this movie spoiler-less" Pseudonym hushed.  
"I was just going to say Princess Leia is in the movie and it's so cool but okay!" the interviewer said into her mic.  
"Don't you see? We live in the age of spoilers. Nothing is sacred anymore. Movie plots used to be respected and trusted, in the simpler times no one would give away the plot twists so their friends could experience it themselves. Everything changed though. People started enjoying the movie so much that they just had to talk about it, they just couldn't hold it in. Others did it just to be dicks, loving the feeling of pissing other people off with the details. With the rise of the Internet everyone could post about the movies online in forums. The Internet was created to contain the spoilers, everyone could go to a designated place to discuss the movies without ruining it for others. But everything backfired. People got too curious. They were really interested in the movie, and everyone who saw it was raving over it. They wanted to see what was so good about the movie, just get a peek, but went too far and spoiled it for themselves. Then the trolls emerged. They would invade the spoiler areas to build up their spoilers and ruin it for others. They became easier and easier to find. With the introduction of social media the public could post the spoilers for all their friends to see. Nobody could be trusted. Video games began to become more intricate and plot-involved, spoilers rose within them as well. Things became worse than ever with the arrival of a new form of spoilers: leaks. Rumors say they used to be called rumors, but they became more and more common and more and more ended up becoming legitimate. Movies and video games could now be spoiled before they even released. Video games started doing special broadcasts where they could reveal information about a game before it released. This new information left the leakers with less to spoil for us. But then the broadcasts themselves started getting leaked. The leaks became too powerful and are now more common than ever. You can't anticipate the new Smash Bros direct without somebody leaking all of the characters they were going to reveal. You can't go on your Facebook without seeing a spoiler about the new Fallout game. You can't watch a trailer without finding out 80% of the movie. You can't go on 4chan without...ok well it's 4chan what the hell were you expecting. But why have the spoilers become so powerful? Because we crave it. Everyone is so hyped up about the newest movie or video game they can't wait to experience it, they want all of the information instantaneously so they could evaluate the plot and make sure they don't make a wasted purchase. They're so hyped about the game and don't care if they find out what's in it a little bit early because it doesn't affect their experience, so they look forward to finding out all of the reveals a day before it would have happened. And then some people just want the information to post in their group chats so they piss their friends off. Why do you think terrorists exist in this world? It's because somebody spoiled Planet of the Apes for them. All of the evil in this world link back to the leaks. They were designed to ruin our experience and destroy humanity. But it won't end here. For spoilers will soon take on a new form. Ironic spoiling. Spoilers have recently become running jokes on websites. It's harder not to see the spoiler than it is to see it. People are now spoiling movies just to be funny. In about 5 years time spoilers will have become so powerful that the entire plot of movies and video games will be uncovered before the trailers are even out." Pseudonym explained.  
"That's so cool" the interviewer replied, walking away.  
"Some people just don't care" Element shrugged. Well now I gotta post the emote. Rick posts it a lot I'll just copy it from our chat. ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯ there we go.  
"It's not that hard to avoid spoilers, just stay off the internet." Marrowksy suggested.  
"I'm afraid that won't work, Marr. For I fear leaks will soon begin to take human form." Pseudonym said dramatically.  
"Wot" Marrowsky replied.  
"Ok that probably won't happen but it would be super annoying if it did" Pseudonym cilantro.

The former Team Jacob members were chilling out on a street curb. Mike, Alice, J, Reu, Lemon, and Isaac.

"Well this sucks" Lemon said, resting his cheek on his fist. The same fist he used to finger himself the night prior.  
"So are we supposed to just sit around and wait for Luke to return?" Isaac asked.  
"I don't know. I guess we could walk around. But we might see...people..." Alice said.  
"Why don't we just return to Haiku Drama?" Lemon suggested.  
"Oh fuck there he goes bringing THIS up again" Alice rolled her eyes.  
"Lemon, the show has gone to far. It's so cruel and senseless, it's gotten way out of control. It's tainted now, you saw the way we were abused and insulted back there." Alice explained.  
"Actually I think only Lukeguy was being harassed" Reu thought.  
"Right." Alice nodded.  
"So...the rest of us weren't" Reu replied.  
"Yes we were. Luke equals all of us." Alice insisted.  
"In a neoplastic sort of way?" Lemon asked.  
"What? Fuck you. It's not even like he was the only one misrepresented back there. Don't you hate being called mindless followers?" Alice asked.  
"Yes" Isaac answered.  
"Yes" Mike answered.  
"Yes" J answered.  
"Yes" Reu answered.  
"No" Lemon answered.  
"Lemon what the hell. Change your answer to yes" Alice insisted.  
"Well I was thinking I might disagree with some of your arguments" Lemon replied.  
":s you're pretentious" Alice said.  
"Oh..." Lemon replied.

[Reu in le confession toilet]  
"This whole drama thing is so overly dramatic and not what Haiku Drama is about. There needs to be a way to make everyone happy again...you know without nuking the show or something..."  
[le end]

"So anyways, how is your sex life?" Mike asked.  
"I'm getting bored" Isaac whined.  
"We could talk about video games" Lemon suggested.  
"What's the point the show will just skip all of that and only show the parts where we talk about juicy shit" Alice remarked.  
"Reality TV in its prime" Reu added.  
"Prime. Metroid Prime. Berk. BERK." Mike shouted.  
"Oh yeah haha Berserker what a nice pal of us, huh?" Lemon asked.  
"No he sucks and is a faggot and is retarded." Alice said.  
"Do you guys want to hear about my feelings?" Isaac asked.  
"Berk trying to sound cool and smart on haiku, only revealing his Freak side on Kik." Alice said.  
"Hey let's stop this. He might find out." Reu suggested.  
"Yeah you're right him finding out is the wrong part of this" Alice agreed.  
"Hey guys let's all visit the queen" J suggested.  
"Queen? Are they playing? Get it because there's a band called Queen. Music references are funny." Lemon said.  
"Sure. Sounds like fun" Alice agreed.  
"Remember when this show has challenges and we didn't just wander around aimlessly until the end?" Isaac asked.  
"No, not really" Alice said.

And so the group set off to see the queen.

Nicholas, Gingerale, and Berserker were hanging themselves around Buckingham Palace.

"Wow, you were right. Suffocation really does increase sexual tension during masturbation" Nicholas said.  
"Shut up you fat shit. Anyway wanna check out Buckingham Palace? I played Zombie U so I know the layout of it" Gingerale offered.  
"Shouldn't we get back to the challenge?" Nicholas asked.  
"No we got banned we're not part of the show anymore, let's just chill out with the queen or something" Gingerale suggested.  
"Wow. Banned. Sure does feel weird..." Nicholas said.  
"You get used to it." Berserker replied.  
"Whatever this gives us move time to do whatever we want. We're definitely some of the lesser used players on the show so it's good to get some attention for once" Gingerale noted.  
"AAAAAAAAAAHHHDIFIFJSBEJEJ" Riley shouted.  
"Ew..." Nicholas said.  
"Oh yeah, and that other guy is here too. Madorky's faggot friend" Gingerale said.  
"AAAAAAHHHH" Riley screamed.  
"Stop it. Stop making those noises. Those are not human noises." Nicholas commanded.  
"I'M HAVING A SEXUAL OUTBREAK" Riley screamed, thrusting his pelvis forward towards Nick.  
"You are gay." Nicholas said.  
"How gay am I?" Riley asked.  
"How gay are you? You're gay." Nicholas answered.  
"Like on a scale of gay, what level of gay am I?" Riley asked.  
"On a scale of gay? There's only one level of gay, that's being gay. You're either gay or you're not" Nicholas said.  
"Poooooooooh" Riley moaned.

[Nicholas in le confession toilet]  
"Why did I decide to start talking to Riley again?"  
[le end]

[Riley in le confession toilet]  
"After being kicked from ANOTHER group, all I have now is that weird guy with the Charizard hat and his angsty boyfriend who is mean to people. But Berk is here too so maybe I can get laid"  
[le end]

Nicholas, Gingerale, Berserker, and Riley opened the gate to Buckingham Palace and gazed around as they were drawn closer toward the large building.

"Whoa, hey guys, welcome to Buckingham Palace" Alice greeted.

The four turned around to see Alice, Lemon, Reu, Isaac, J, and Mike passing through the gate.

"Hey fellas. Been awhile since we gathered like this, huh?" Lemon asked.  
"You mean like two hours ago?" Isaac asked.  
"Really? It feels like it's been a month. A very, very, very long month." Gingerale complained.  
"SHREK" Mike shouted.  
"Haha that's our Kile" Nicholas said.  
"So you were heading to see the queen too? Cool. Maybe we can all go together" Alice said.  
"Ok!" Riley said, jumping in the air with his fist up.  
"Wait, hold on. So you want to join a group. A group full of the people you have kicked out of your own. And you don't expect this to be awkward at all?" Berserker asked.

Alice folded her arms and bent her knees, making John Cena hand signals.

"Yo dawg let's just forget all that. The less Kik references the better" Alice suggested peacefully.  
"I don't know. We're not the type of people to just kick out somebody just because they bother one or two of us" Gingerale shot.  
"Hey guys I just found this cool katana store on the boulevard and it reminded me of Kit Kats which reminded me of that Halloween commercial which reminded me we should totally crossdress together sometime, it helps make you in recognizable so you-"  
"Shut up J" Gingerale said, punching J.

[Gingerale in le confession toilet]  
"The only way I'd crossdress is if it was as a reference to Final Fantasy 7. That game makes weeb RPGs tolerable"  
The plane was then blown up by Final Fantasy 6 fans.  
[le end]

J fell to the ground, knocking his glasses off. Lemon offered him a hand and helped him up.

"Hey, uh guys, I was-" Isaac tried to say something.  
"Let's just find some common ground and work things out" Reu suggested.  
"What is that? I have never heard of this concept? I only know of removing people who bother me from my life" Alice said.  
"Ok. See. Right there. No more of sentences like that. This is what starts wars. Let's just calm down, relax, and do some fun things together. We get to travel all around the world, let's have some fun with this" Reu suggested calmly.

J touched a guard's bearskin and giggled.

"I don't know about you guys but I think cutting the roster down by 7 people could give us more speaking opportunities" Nicholas said.

J pressed down on the bearskin and laughed.

"Yeah. And I mean-" Gingerale started.

J laughed.

"You guys wouldn't have to-"

J laughed harder.

"You wouldn't be made fun of any-"

J giggled as he pressed down harder, the guard kept a motionless expression.

"J CAN YOU CUT IT OUT" Gingerale screamed.  
"Sorry! It's just so funny. I wish I had an Afro wig like these guys, they look so nice!" J laughed.  
"J they are called bearskin" Nicholas corrected.  
"So guys, I was thinking I could-" Isaac tried to say.  
"More like foreskin amirite :" J said.

Nicholas facepalmed like the rage comic guy, a callback to the classic HDI episode where Nicholas has a feast with rage comics and acts as one of them to gain their approval. He has since learned the art of the rage comic.

"We don't even want to be on this stupid show anymore we're just checking out London because we might as well" Alice said.  
"Hey, I have something to say" Isaac tried to start.  
"Wait I still want to be on this show, you didn't have to use the word "we" like that" Lemon said.

Alice turned around and held her hand out toward the rest of her group, concentrating.

"You do not want to be on this show" Alice said.  
"We do not want to be on this show" they all repeated.  
"Whoa what?" Lemon asked in disbelief, looking at the rest of the group's emotionless faces.

"Are we going to see the queen or what I don't think either side wants to hear about this shit any longer." Gingerale suggested.  
"Thylacines are great" Berserker added.

[Lemon in le confession toilet]  
"Alright, I'm determined to keep things under control. I don't want to see my friends bicker like this so I'll try my best to keep both sides happy. Maybe even things can go back to the way things were before!"  
Lemon grinned to the camera.  
[le end]

[Mike in le confession toilet]  
"I dont give a poop whats going on I'll just follow wherever shitposts guide meh"  
[le Ed]

Sam opened his eyes. Stretching his arms, he leaped up and stood sternly. Scratching his head, he peered down the streets to see no one but London civilians, who were more pale and boring looking compared to the main characters to make the main characters stick out more. A Londononian approached Sam. He smiled and had huge buck teeth reaching to the bottom of his mouth.

"Ou gay noisier? Do yew like tea parties?" he asked.  
"Ew, British people! Gross!" Sam said with a disgusted face, brushing him off and walking away.

[Sam in le confession toilet]  
"So apparently in London the people just see somebody laying unconscious on the round and walk past them. Classic Brits. Or should I say, Bridiots. HA! OH YEAH!"  
Sam punched through the wall in excitement.  
[le end]

Sam felt an ache in his back as he walked down the streets.  
He saw Robot in a telephone booth. He walked inside of it.

"Oh, hey. How'd you find me?" Robot asked.  
"My Sammy Sense came in handy." Sam said, taking a huge whiff.  
"What's this all about, then?" Sam asked Robot, looking at the telephone.  
"Oh. I was calling somebody..." Robot said hesitantly.  
"Ok bro. We gotta find the rest of the team. I'm not losing this challenge" Sam said.  
"I think it's a little too late for that..." Robot said.  
"No! You remember what the challenge is, right? Torture. TORTURE! I FUCKING LOVE TORTURE. And I'll be damned if I don't get to squeeze somebody's nips. Come on, let's go find the others" Sam said, taking Robot's hand and rushing out of the booth.  
"Wait. Sam. You didn't see what happened...the team, they..." Robot tried to say.  
"Oh hey Bloo is here too" Bloo said, bumping into them.  
"Oh Bloo. You haven't been talking much, bro" Sam said.  
"Yeah I post like once in a bloo moon" she said.  
":)" Sam replied.  
":)" Robot replied.  
"Ok so if we're looking for the torturing place, we should go like down this street, correct?" Robot asked, checking the map on Google.  
"Oh shit look a double decker bus!" Sam said excitedly.  
"It's just a bus with two levels we could probably get their with less complications of we just go down this street" Robot suggested.  
"Robot, we need to squeeze in as many London references as we can to get the full experience. NOW GET ON THE BUS BITCH NIGGA!" Sam yelled, picking Robot up and throwing her through the double decker bus windshield.

Blooberri got on calmly as the driver watched with a terrified face.

"Hey!" Blooberri smiled to the driver, taking a seat on the second level. Sam followed.

As the bus with the three haikuers departed, somebody wearing a long, black coat with a top hat resting on his head watched over. He traced his fingers down the blade he held.

The Stroll Slaiyers were strolling their way down to the movie theater.

"Do you guys want to know my top 20 worst shows?" DryBones asked.  
"No." Grenade replied.  
"20 Worst Shows

20\. Bubble Guppies  
19\. Johnny Test  
18\. Sid the Science Kid  
17\. Breadwinners  
16\. Fresh Beat Band of Spies  
15\. Franklin & Friends  
14\. Dora the Explorer  
13\. Go, Diego, Go!  
12\. Dora & Friends: Into the City  
11\. Strawberry Shortcake's Berry Bitty Adventures  
10\. Miss Spider's Sunny Patch Friends  
9\. Mike the Knight  
8\. Little Bill  
7\. Team Umizoomi  
6\. Wallykazam!  
5\. South Park  
4\. Ni Hao, Kai-lan  
3\. Caillou  
2\. Robot Chicken  
1\. Blaze and the Monster Machines" DryBones said.  
"Has anyone else noticed how retarded DryBones has been becoming lately?" Grenade asked.  
"DryBones is so 2012 who cares" Pantz shrugged.  
"Yeah no one gives a fuck about DryBones" Cloud agreed.  
"Hey! Don't use the F word!" DryBones complained.  
"Oh, pardon me. No one gives a rat's ass about DryBones" Cloud corrected.  
"Cloud could you BE anymore gay?" Ziggy asked.  
"Shut up Ziggy I will end you" Cloud warned.  
"Come at me bro. I mean that literally it will prove how gay you are" Ziggy said.  
"Ok Ziggy. You know what? You like yuri right? What is yuri? Gay girls. What is that? Gay. Therefore you are into gay things. You touch yourself to yuri. Gay people touch dicks. You're gay." Cloud said.  
"Stfu cloud cringe" Ziggy yelled.  
"Can you guys be quiet I'm trying to have an intelligent discussion over here. Anyways so I calculated the radius of my head and concluded that-" Rydli told Svenguyi.

[Grenade in le confession toilet]  
"Wow this team has like no structure. It's like everybody's just screaming at each other the entire time"  
[le end]

"Minions are holocaust survivors" Carz blurted out.  
"Of course!" Shinxy agreed.

[Shinxy in le confession toilet]  
"I looooooove Jews! They are like modern niggers -w-"  
[le end]

As the team approached the theater, Ziggy paused. The rest of the team entered the theater, Cloud holding the door for Ziggy.

"Hey Zigmeister, what's keeping you? You smell some cock nearby or something?" Cloud asked.  
"No!" Ziggy said.  
"Well then what is it?" Cloud asked.  
"I think I hear some ambient music" Ziggy said, turning around.  
"Silly Ziggy you're not supposed to hear that, the music is edited in after the show is shot" Cloud explained.  
"No, I mean I think I hear somebody playing ambient music. Ambient music is pretty dope, I wanna check it out" Ziggy said, walking away from Cloud.  
"Ok homo smell ya later" he replied, closing the door of the theater as he followed the rest of the team.

Ziggy walked down the road, the ambient music growing louder. The sky began to turn darker as Ziggy continued following the music. As Ziggy turned a corner, a man grabbed him and tossed an execution hood over his head. Ziggy panicked and tried to break free from the man's grasp, but he tightened the hood and punched Ziggy in the dick, making Ziggy fall to the ground. He picked Ziggy up and carried him off.

The Troll Slaiyers saw Marrowsky, Pseudonym, and Element in the Star Wars line.

"This line sure is long, huh guys?" Pseudonym said.  
"Yeah, it feels like we've been waiting for over a month" Marrowsky winked to the camera.

Freddie Benson sighed and shook his head.

"Ay yo look at all that free space behind them, we made it just in time!" Pantz said, walking towards the three.  
"Actually, that's the line to see the movie. You need to go through the line to get into the line first" Jp said, pointing towards the other line.  
"Poop balls!" Pantz snapped her fingers.

Element frowned and kept his facial direction away from Marrowsky and Pseudo.

"Something wrong?" Marrowsky asked him.  
"You know, you got what I was saying. Historical references. Writing. It was the same idea, it's not like I said something completely off" Element said.  
"But Jonathan Hancock signed the Declaration of Independence, he didn't write the constitution" Pseudonym said.  
"Well excuse me, it's not like I'm a history major! You got what I was going for!" Element defended.  
"Ok, but. Element, you did this same thing at PAX. How did you make the same exact mistake here?" Pseudonym asked.  
"I was thinking too hard, you know how I get when I think" Element tried to explain.

Propane Nightmares played from Element's phone. He grabbed it out of his pocket and answered the call.

"Hi mom" he greeted.  
"Oh. I was put on this TV show, we're in that British place, can't think of the bloody name right now, a lot of my internet friends are here too though so it's fine...What do you mean I should come home? It's not like I'm going to do anything there anyways...I don't care about Chris...no...no...I don't know, a few months ago?...a few people have called me smelly yes but I thought they were joking...ok maybe not showering had a correlation with that...ok fine...alright I get it, geez...I'm fine mom shut up...MOM SHUT UP...mom I can't I'm about to see Star Wars with he squad...OK FINE GOSH" Element sighed, hanging up the phone.  
"Mom says I need to take a shower so I'll be back in like an hour probably" Element said, leaving the line and getting squished between fat people as he tried to leave the theater.

[Element in le confession toilet]  
"I only know the plot of Star Wars because of the Lego games anyways and Marrowsky and Pseudonym are like my C tier friends so whatever"  
[le end]

As Element neared the theater exit, a little girl tugged his shirt.

"Excuse me, is it true you're the one who wrote the constitution?" the little girl asked timidly.  
"Ugh" Element said.  
"Could you write me an autograph, mister?" she asked.

The 12 other Troll Slaiyers + Svenguyi were in the other line.

"So, Svenguyi. You from around here?" Rydli asked.  
"I'm British so yes." Svenguyi replied.

[Rydli in le confession toilet]  
"I know what you're thinking. Why am I talking to Svenguyi. The answer is simple, I'm building up my support with as many people as possible. Since the other team removed themselves from the group, Admin is in need of some new characters. I'm sure Svenguyi will make for a wonderful addition. And a wonderful partner. Just gotta make sure I don't say anything that might tick her off. HIM. HIM. FUCK"  
Svenguyi busted into the room and grabbed Rydli's head, smashing it against the toilet.  
"WHAT THE FUCK YOU CALL ME BRO?" Svenguyi roared.  
"It was a slip ok you can't just expect everybody to adjust to it overnight" Rydli defended, his head bleeding.  
"Check your facts bro it's almost been two years you should be used to it by now, BITCH" Svenguyi screamed.  
"Hey a transgender referencing they changed genders that's a first" Rydli said.  
Svenguyi punched Rydli in the face. He then ripped the toilet off the wall and smashed it off Rydli's head, causing it to break in two. Rydli fell down and fainted.  
Svenguyi pounded his chest and leapt out the window  
[le end]

Svenguyi unhooked the line rope and stepped out of line angrily. The rope whipped back into its pole.

"SOMEBODY UNHOOKED THE LINE, AAAAH" somebody screamed.

The lines all broke free and everybody ran around frantically, not knowing where to stand. Popcorn, drinks, and snacks were thrown around as the haikuers ducked and tried to avoid getting struck.

Svenguyi walked to the front of the Star Wars line.

"Hey I was here first" a 12 year old said.

Svenguyi kicked the 12 year old and he flew like a football across the room.

The sprinklers went off and water rained all across the theater. A fire alarm went off, indicating everybody to leave.

"Oh." Marrowsky said.  
"NOOOOOOOOO! NOOOO! I can't miss this movie!" the guy in front of Pseudo shouted.  
"I am going to kill whoever caused this" he said.  
"Hey Pseudo have you seen Lucas, the one who caused this? The one who was hanging out with us? Our good friend we've known for years? I can't find him" Kirby said.  
"No." Pseudo replied.  
"You're acquainted with the one who did this?" he asked.  
"Not really, I'm just aware of his existence" Pseudonym explained.  
"I am going to do something worse than kill you. I am going to spoil the movie for you." he said, grabbing Pseudo by his shirt.  
"SAVE YOURSELF MARROWSKY YOU CAN STILL MAKE IT OUT ALIVE" Pseudo yelled.

Marrowksy bolted for the door to avoid the spoiler.

"You wanna spoil the movie for me? Go ahead and try...I got some spoilers of my own up my sleeve..." Pseudo warned.

The guy pulled Pseudo closer to him. They locked eyes as the sprinklers rained water all over them, the spoiler-off about to commence.

Marrowksy stepped out of the theater, where the rest of the haikuers were waiting.

"Well that was eventful." Jp said.  
"MINIONS DID IT! FUCK MINIONS!" Carz shouted.  
"Carz you are wearing a minion t-shirt" Grenade said.  
"Grenade you are talking to Carz like a normal person." Mr. Moogle said.  
"Oh right, sorry." Grenade realized.

"Honestly this probably wouldn't have happened if Rydli just kept his mouth shut and left Svenguyi alone" Pantz said.  
"How do you know Rydli's involved with this?" Cloud asked.  
"He's not here and he's been talking to him since he's been here." Pantz explained.  
"Rydli probably didn't mean it, man. Come on, when has Rydli ever been mean to someone?" Cloud asked.  
"What are you saying? Svenguyi deserved the treatment he got?" Pantz asked with a questioning face.  
"What no I don't even know what he said. But from past experience Svenguyi is known to...overreact a bit" Cloud said.  
"Wow. So you're on his side. I'd rather not expand on this." Pantz said, walking away.  
"Was that a joke about expanding posts on haiku? That would be pretty funny. Pantz? Pantz?" Cloud called out.  
"Word of advice. Always agree with girls. It makes things easier." Marrowsky advised Cloud.  
":s" Cloud replied.

Ziggy opened his eyes and blinked a few times. He looked around and noticed he was strapped to a table. He tried to move but was strapped tightly.

"So you've awakened." a metallic voice spoke.

Ziggy watched as the man with the top hat slowly walked over and took a seat in front of him.

"Tell me. Are you familiar with him?" the man asked, holding a photograph for Ziggy to see.

/a/96YnE

"Who are you?" Ziggy asked, trying to break free again.  
"Do you know him?" the man repeated.  
"Know him? Yeah, I know him. It's doge." Ziggy answered.  
"You were a fan of this character, yes?" the man asked.  
"Can't say I was a fan...why are you asking me these questions?" Ziggy asked.  
"It was to my understanding that you were a fan of dog memes. Are you not the one?" the man asked, his voice beginning to hint at agitation.  
"No! Doge is gross! I like doggos and puppers, not dumb doge!" Ziggy explained.

The man moved closer. He grabbed Ziggy by the throat.

"Where is he? The fan of doge? He came with you. WHERE IS HE?" the man shouted at him.  
"It's hard to answer with you choking me" Ziggy replied slowly as he was being choked.

Nicholas, Gingerale, Berserker, Riley, J, Reu, Lemon, Alice, Mike, and Isaac were in Buckingham Palace, on their way to the queen. The bunch walked in two different groups, one with the six aforementioned and one with the four others. J was wearing a bearskin on his head.

"I thought we weren't returning to the show. Why are we with these guys?" Reu asked.  
"They aren't on the show ether dimwad." Alice said.  
"Then why is there a cameraman following is?" Reu asked.  
"Freddie we quit the show can you stop following us?" Alice asked.  
"But guys, I just got this new Sony PMS-300 One XDCAM and I can't let it go to no use. Nobody else is visiting the queen I gotta catch this!" Freddie pleaded.  
"Omg you're such a tech nerd Freddie nobody cares!" Alice said.

Nicholas, Riley, Gingerale, and the other guy. Berserker yeah him walked ahead a bit.

"I think Riley likes cameras like this too." Lemon said, admiring the camera.  
"Oh, Riley." Alice said.  
"What?" Lemon asked.  
"Oh, nothing. Don't want Freddie to tape me saying shit and using it to fuel the show for ideas" Alice said.

Mike whacked the camera out of Freddie's hands where it smashed against the floor.

"Problem solved" Mike said.  
"Hey! That was over $7,000!" Freddie complained.

"Ok well, I guess Riley has been pretty retarded lately. He's done some perverted things, and has lots of stupid opinions. Idk I guess sometimes I wish he wasn't such a freak" Alice said.

Lemon looked down and thought to himself as the group pressed on.

They all arrived in the next room. The queen sat upon her throne.

"M'lady" Lemon greeted.  
"Omg the queen you look so nice!" J said.  
"Shut up J" Gingerale said.  
"Whoa you look so hot" Riley complimented.

Alice rolled her eyes.

"Maybe we can ask her a question. She probably has a lot of wisdom" Lemon said.  
"Lemon it's the queen of England not the Wizard of Oz what kind of enlightenment do you expect to receive from her?" Reu asked.  
"Did gay people exist back when you were a kid?" J asked.  
"Hm?" the queen asked.  
"J." Nicholas said.  
"Well, I mean, people back then were so fancy and civilized. Do you think there were gay people in like caveman times or me devil ages? It's hard imagining a gay person just walking around during George Washington's era. Did they just become a thing one day?" J asked.  
"I don't know..." Queen Elizabeth answered.  
"What's your opinion on Donald Trump?" Nicholas asked.  
"Hmm, k. Do you think cats can be racist?" J asked.  
"J how does that even connect to the queen?" Gingerale asked.  
"Idk I mean have you ever seen a black person with a cat? Do you think they notice the difference between whites and blacks? Have you ever seen a cat go like "ew" towards a black guy maybe? Idek just wondering" J said.  
"Who let these special needs kids in here?" Queen Elizabeth asked her guards.

J laughed.

"My principal said the same thing to me once!" J told her.

The guards graves the haikuers.

"Hold on, wait. Queen. Give us a chance. There's this place I want to show you. I think you'll have a good time" J smiled.  
"What are you talking about?" Queen Elizabeth asked.

The doors of the G-A-Y bar slammed open as J strutted in, hand in hand with the queen. The rest of the group followed behind awkwardly. All of the guys in the bar danced to One Direction as J handed the queen a beer.

"Aren't you a little young to be able to order beer?" The Queen asked.  
"It's ok a few years from now I'll be old enough to do this legally so when we look back at this episode I'll actually be the correct age" J explained.

Male strippers danced for Reu, Isaac, Alice, and Mike as they sat at a table.

"Gotta say, this is not the direction I thought my day would go in" Reu said as a male wiggled his butt in Reu's face.  
"VORE me" Mike demanded.  
"What's that?" The stripper asked.

Mike got up and ate the stripper hole and pooped him out.

"This is why we shouldn't let J hang out with us" Gingerale said as two guys made out next to him.

The Queen gulped down another beer and smashed her head off the table.

"AAAAA" she screamed, pulling her shirt up.

Gingerale pinched his eyes and scowled J.

"Here, Gingerale, have some more beer." J said, pouring him a glass.  
"I'd rather drink piss. Which is basically the same thing." Gingerale said.  
"Shinxy used to say that about Element's pee..." Nicholas said.

Mike dumped alcohol into his mouth.

Lemon saw Berserker uncomfortably sitting by himself. Riley was nearby screaming animalistic noises at people and taking his shirt off. Lemon walked over and sat next to them.

"Hey, guys. I uh, well, some of the other guys were saying things. I think you deserve to know what people say about you, so I decided I should show you." Lemon said, taking his phone out.

He showed Berk and Riley the videos.

"Berk trying to sound cool and smart on haiku, only revealing his Freak side on Kik." Alice said.  
"Ok well, I guess Riley has been pretty retarded lately. He's done some perverted things, and has lots of stupid opinions. Idk I guess sometimes I wish he wasn't such a freak" Alice said.

"Wow...is that really how she feels..." Riley said.  
"I just thought it'd be fair to show you. Just try not to say anything about it, could cause some-"  
"ALIIIIIIIIICE" Riley screamed.

Riley pushed through the waves of gay guys and ran up to Alice.

"Heard you called me a freak behind my back?! What's all that about? How could I consider you a friend?" Riley snapped.

Lemon banged his head against the table.

"So I'm a freak?" Berserker asked Alice.  
"Yes. I've said this to you before. This time included." Alice replied.

"Reu, Mike, J, Isaac, Lemon! We need to talk!" Alice ordered.  
"Hold on, we're about to do some karaoke!" J laughed from the stage.

J was handed a microphone. The entire bar watched as he began his performance.

[Song #15 - Chipper]  
J: Marr Marr and kittens, fashion and haiku  
I know my day'll be swell, because I have you  
When you want to feel this awesome, you know what to do  
To feel chipper, the way I do

-  
Gingerale gets up on stage and takes the mic from J

Gingerale: Sometimes, things can get you stressed, and you need to let it out  
No need, to act under pressure, no need to scream or shout  
When you want to feel this awesome, you know what to do  
To feel chipper, the way I do

Nicholas: I know, sometimes, the world, can feel, against you  
But I know, a way, to briefly change, your entire view

J, Gingerale, and Nicholas: Yeah we're feeling chipper

Crowd: Chippeeeerrrr, yeeeeah

Lemon, Reu, Isaac, Riley, Berserker, Mike, and Alice get up on stage and stand near J, Gingerale, and Nicholas

Riley: C's for the cummies, daddy will give you  
Reu: H is the happiness that it ensues  
Lemon: I stands for the impurity you now own  
Isaac: Two P's for PP  
Mike: Make sure it's grown  
Alice: Add an E for everlasting, happy feelings  
Berserker: Now all that's left is R, for rinse and repeat

All: We're feeling chipper  
Crowd: Chippeeeerrrr, yeeeeah

J: Sometimes, life can be rough, and I feel down  
Gingerale: But have no worry, I can make a smile out of that frown

Nicholas: It feels coy, but it will give you joy  
Don't be a hipster  
Feel chipper

Gingerale: Chipper  
J: Chipper  
Nicholas, J, and Gingerale: We're feeling chipper  
All: Chipper tonight  
[le big finish]

Queen Elizabeth jumped into the crowd and everyone moved out of the way, she smashed into a table and collapsed onto he ground.

"We should probably go, J's getting trashed" Gingerale said.  
"I tell you time and time again I'm not as think and you drunk I am" J responded.  
"Shut up J" Gingerale sighed.  
"Alright let me get the bleach and we'll be ok our way!" Nicholas said.

Just then, Nicholas' head was whacked by a waffle bat.  
Nicholas collapses on the ground.

"Nicholas?" Gingerale asked before getting struck next.  
"I'll have what he's having!" J said, getting struck next.

The three bodies were dragged away as the rest of the group talked outside.

"Ok. So apparently one of you guys leaked. Who was it?" Alice asked.

Mike, Reu, Lemon, and Isaac looked at each other.

"Come on who the hell spilled the beans!?" Alice demanded.  
"Maybe instead of focusing on who told on you we could think about maybe not talking bad about people behind their backs in the first place" Lemon suggested.

Everybody stood quiet for a moment.

"Lemon, are you retarded? Ok it must be Lemon then. Mike doesn't care, Isaac is never here, and Reu isn't important enough" Alice figured.  
"Hey!" Reu complained.  
"Ok, fine, maybe I told them. I just thought they deserved to know what was being said about them. Is that so bad?" Lemon asked.  
"Yes. Now they're going to start shit with me" Alice said.

Lemon walked over to Berserker and Riley.

"Ok guys what the heck. Why did you tell her I showed you guys those things, now she's pissed at me." Lemon complained.  
"We didn't rat you out, she just figured it out. And if they're talking shit they expect some sort of retaliation. Bitch." Riley said.  
"I can't believe you leaked that I leaked them" Lemon said.  
"Well I can't believe you leaked that I leaked that you leaked them to me" Riley said.  
"...what?" Lemon asked.

"Alice! Alice! Riley called you a bitch, I got it on camera. And Lemon was there so he's an accessory" Mike said.  
"We're 5 feet away is this really necessary?" Lemon asked.  
"Nice Mike" Alice thanked.  
"Ok wait are Mike and Lemon actually invoked with leaks I can't tell which of these are based on past events or not anymore" Isaac said.  
"Hold on, wait. So it's ok for people to leak things from others to you, but it's not ok for people to leak things from you to others?" Lemon asked.  
"Yes, is that such a hard concept to grasp?" Alice asked.

Alice started to realize something and backed away from the others.

"No. No. I see what's happening now..." Alice said.  
"What?" Reu asked.  
"The criticism. The wrongful antagonizing. First it was Luke, now it's seeping to me. It won't be long before it spreads to you guys too. We need to get out of here now before this show makes us look even worse" Alice explained.  
"Oh shit, you're right. They're probably going to satirize the time I...or the time I...or when I...ok well I don't have much say in the group I don't know what they could do to me" Reu said.  
"No, Alice, we can still make this work." Lemon said.  
"It's too late..." Alice sighed.

The sky got darker. The haikuers turned around to see the wind blow fiercely.

"Odd, the weather changed suddenly..." Isaac said.  
"Oh no...It's Happening..." Reu said, looking ahead.

The clouds darkened as feces started to swirl around wildly. The storm slowly crept near the group.

"It's a shitstorm." Reu said.  
"What?" Lemon asked.  
"A shitstorm. It's a shitstorm and it's coming for us." Reu explained.  
"A shitstorm. A literal shitstorm. So, like there's actual shit? From the storm?" Lemon asked.  
"As the name implies, yes." Reu said.  
"How is that possible?" Lemon asked.  
"It looks like a personification of rage" Reu said.  
"Ok so it's some sort of cheap, unfunny gag?" Lemon asked.  
"Pretty much" Reu said.

One by one, all seven of them were whacked off the head with a bat. As they all fell, they were dragged away by an unknown person.

Sam, Robot, and Blooberri watched the scene from behind a telephone booth.

"What the heck is that?" Bloo asked.  
"Oh shit dawgs shit is HAPPENING in here" Sam said.  
"Is that what happened to the rest of our team? Are we the only ones left?" Bloo asked.  
"It appears so. Maybe we should follow that guy taking them and find out where he's hiding" Robot suggested.  
"Solid idea brotowski" Sam said, giving Robot a fist pump.  
"What if he sees us and harms us?" Bloo asked.  
"It's three against one, bitch. And you have me with you, so it's practically ten on one." Sam said.  
"Isn't your back injured though? If we get into a scuffle we probably couldn't fight well" Robot said.

As the three brought their attention back to the man, he was gone. They walked over and he was nowhere to be seen, along with the bodies. Bloo picked up one of Riley's pokewalkers

"We might need some help" she said.  
"Ok but who could possibly help us solve this crime?" Sam asked.  
"I might know a well known detective who fits this scenario well" Robot deemed.

The three sat in the office of the detective. The detective sat with his chair facing opposite them. Only his hat was visible to them.

"We hear you know a thing or two about solving cases" Robot began.  
"Pika pika pi" the detective replied.

Pseudo and The Guy were ready to begin the fisticuffs.

"Go ahead, spoil it for me. If you do that, I'll spoil the ending to Fallout 4" Pseudo warned.  
"Go ahead. That ending isn't even what happens, that's just a 4chan meme." the guy shot back.  
"Wait what"  
"Kylo Re-"  
"Hold on, no, wait! Uh, I'll spoil the ending of Super Mystery Dungeon." Pseudo threatened.  
"I don't care." the guy insisted.  
"Ok, fine. I'll spoil Xenoblade. I haven't played it myself I just know from Rydli" Pseudo said.  
"What the heck is a Xenoblade?"  
"Ok I'll spoil...Undertale?" Pseudo suggested.  
"That game has already been spoiled no one ever shuts up about it" the guy said.  
"Ok this whole spoiler fight isn't going the way I thought it would" Pseudo admitted.  
"You know what's weird though? Why would you spoil a movie for yourself before seeing it?" Pseudo asked.  
"It wasn't my choice. I didn't mean for it to be spoiled. Truth is, I didn't even think it was real. It was just a rumor, from some leaks that appeared a couple months back. It was just a rumor, I thought it was harmless. I never thought they would actually go through with it. The spoiler turned me to the dark side. And now I'm the spoileree. And I'm about to spoil the movie for you right now!" he said.  
"Ok whatever by time this episode airs everybody will have already seen it" Pseudo said.

Just then, Svenguyi charged forth, jumping over Pseduo's head and smashing headfirst into the guy. She delivered an uppercut that thrusted him up towards the ceiling, where he stuck there.

"Cool." Pseudonym said.

Svenguyi rushes out the door in a rampage.

Rydli limped towards the theater, holding an ice pack on his forehead.

"Hey guys" Rydli greeted, standing with the rest of the Troll Slaiyers, his leg shaking.  
"Whoa Rydli you look so hot with that ice pack" Joe complimented.  
"Thanks, I need it so I don't overheat from my own stunning appearance" Rydli explained.  
"I think it makes you look like a faggot jej" Shinxy said.  
"Hey! Watch your language buddy!" DryBones said.  
"no u nigger" Shinxy said, slapping Boner.

Svenguyi busted through the wall and punched Shinxy in the back of the head, making him fall to the ground and knock his head off the pavement.

"Don't use words like that..." Svenguyi said.  
"Yay!" DryBones said.

DryBones and Svenguyi had a high five, but Svenguyi slapped too hard and DryBones got a boo boo.

"Ok so if we can't see Star Wars, where do we go?" Jp asked.  
"Might as well report back to Admin. Don't think we have enough time to do anything else." Marrowsky said.  
"Hey Marrowsky, are you gay for J?" Cloud asked.

Marrowsky didn't respond.

"I 3 MINIONS!1!11!111!1 they are SOOOOOOOOOO wacky" Carz screamed.  
"Is he saying that ironically?" Grenade asked.  
"Who cares" Cloud said.

The haikuers started walking back towards the Tower, the last place they saw Admin. Rydli tripped over Shinxy.

Nicholas woke up dizzily. He stood up and placed his hand on a wall to gain balance. He looked around but couldn't see anything, for he was in a cold, dark room. As his vision slowly became more clear, he walked forward a bit. As he stepped forward, the lights flicked on. Nicholas paused as he saw a huge glass screen dividing the room. On the other side of the room was a Grovyle, strapped to the wall in shackles. A yard to the Grovyle's right was GingeraleDragon' tied up as well. He stopped drooling and opened his eyes, looking up and down to see he was strapped.

"Gingerale!" Nicholas said.

At the edge of the glass, a large saw spun horizontally, hooked to a small cart. Nicholas looked over the glass to see some tracks for the cart to follow.

"Welcome, Nicholas. You're about to take part in a little game. You will have to make a simple choice. Grovyle? Or Gingerale?" a voice spoke.

Nicholas and Gingerale looked around, trying to detect where the voice was coming from.

"A choice? A choice for what? Nicholas, Nicholas bro you gotta save me" Gingerale pleaded.

Nicholas banged on the glass wall but it wouldn't budge. The cart carrying the saw began to slowly move towards Grovyle and Gingerale. Nicholas looked to his side to see a lever. A picture of Grovyle was on the left, and a picture of Gingerale on the right.

"Gro..." Grovyle said.  
"Nicholas...NICHOLAS! Nicholas dude help me out here!" Gingerale panicked.

The saw slowly moved closer to Grovyle and Gingerale. The trail would soon split to either direct towards one of them. The track's path was connected to the lever in front of Nicholas.

"What is more important to you? Your favorite Pokémon? Or your relationship with Ginger?" the voice asked.  
"The choice is yours. Pull it towards the person you choose to save. Choose wisely." the voice advised, closing out.

Nicholas thought about what to do as Grovyle and Gingerale shook about effortlessly trying to escape.

"Gro! Gro! Grovyle!" Grovyle cried.  
"NICHOLAS YOU FAGGOT GET ME OUT OF THIS RIGHT NOW DON'T LET ME DIE AAAAAAH" Gingerale screamed.

The saw moved closer, now just a yard away from the split. Nicholas eyed the lever some more as he evaluated his choices.  
Nicholas thought about his memories with Gingerale.

"Faggot"  
"Shut up Nichols"  
"Salty? Hahaha"  
"Dang it I forgot to jump"  
"Hey Nicholas you should get GTA"

"Nicholas...dude...don't fucking kill me..." Gingerale pleaded.  
"Grovyle..." the Grovyle said, shedding a tear.  
"Aww...Gingerale...I'm sorry..." Nicholas said, pulling the lever towards the Grovyle picture.

The tracks turned left and the cart took the left path, going towards the Grovyle. The saw shredded through Grovyle's belly. Grovyle screamed in agonizing pain as it pushes forth into his body. Blood spewed out of his stomach, splattering all over Gingerale. The saw cut deeper into Grovyle and his guts fell out. The Grovyle cried and screamed one final time before the saw cut straight through his body, Grovyle's lower half fell to the ground, leaving his torso to hang lifeless on from the shackles.

Nicholas watched the Grovyle's lifeless body.

"Thanks, bro" Gingerale thanked.  
"Actually, Nicholas opted to choose Grovyle" someone said.

Admin opened the door and walked in.

"What?" Gingerale asked.  
"It was rigged to kill Grovyle no matter what. We just wanted to see who Nicholas would save. And he chose Grovyle. So he failed the challenge. You guys don't get the point" Admin said.  
"What the he*k. What's the point of giving me the choice between saving one person if the outcome is always the same anyways?" Nicholas asked.  
"It was a test. You failed dude. Sorry!" Admin said.  
"What the fuck. Nicholas did you try to kill me!?" Gingerale barked.  
"...no..." Nicholas said.

Admin unhooked Gingerale and guided him and Nicholas out of the room, where all of the Troll Slaiyers minus Element were.

"You see this? You notice how all of the Troll Slaiyers stay together and don't scatter into a bunch of little groups? You see how they voluntarily came back to us and didn't have to be captured by us? You should try that." Admin said.  
"Maybe that's just because they don't have the dynamic character arcs we do B)" Nicholas said.  
"The thing is, you're down by a lot of people. Lukeguy, Blooberri, Sam, Robot, and Nicholas just failed his challenge. You'll have to pull through if you want to win." Admin said.  
"We can still do this!" J said optimistically.  
"Shut up J" Gingerale said, slapping his head.

Gingerale huddled with Alice, Mike, Lemon, Isaac, and Reu.

"Ok, look. I know we've had some trouble lately, but in order to pull through we'll have to work together as a team. Let's put our differences aside and do this as a team, and save the drama for between the challenges" Gingerale offered.  
":s I don't even want to be on this show anymore it's just going to spew more retarded shit" Alice said.  
"Well maybe if-" Lemon started.  
"Ok Lemon I think it's best if we don't suggest things." Reu said, hushing him.

"Anyways, Moogle your challenge is up. You have to torture Gingerale by burning him alive" Admin said.  
"Alright" Mr. Moogle said.

Moogle grabbed Gingerale by his bloody bloody shirt and threw him in a sauna, where he turned the temperate all the way up until the heating system broke.

"I'm liking these challenges" Kirby smiled.  
"Oh yeah, says the gore fan" Pseudo rolled his eyes.

Kirby squealed and blushed.

"Point Troll Slaiyers" Admin said.

"Alright, bring it bitch. Let's get our torture on" J said, rolling his sleeves up.  
"You need to give DryBones a spanking" Admin said.

J walked over as Imboo held DryBones down. J slapped DryBones' ass and DryBones cried.

"Sorry!" J apologized.  
"Don't be a little bitch about it" Cloud whined.  
"STOP SWEARING GEEZ" DryBones growled.

"This is never going to work we need more players if we want to even hope to beat them." Reu said.  
"You know who we need? We need Luke." Lemon said.  
"Hey guys I was wondering if-" Isaac began.  
"I think it's best if we leave Luke alone. He doesn't want to be here, let's not force him" Alice said.  
"We're down by so many players we can't win without him" Lemon said.  
"Who cares let's just take the loss. He probably wants to get voted off anyways" Alice insisted.  
"Actually, if Luke leaves he'll use be disqualified. You'll still have an elimination too" Admin reminded them.  
"Ugh" Alice said.  
"I think he'll come back..." Lemon said.

[Lemon in le confession toilet]  
"There's a secret about Haikik admins. They never leave dead groups they are an admin in. No idea why, it must make them feel powerful or something. If that stays true here, Luke might still be out there ready to come back..."  
[le end]

Sitting inside a capsule on the London Eye, Luke watched over London. Night started to fall and all of the buildings lit up in bright lights.

"It's lit hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahagagagahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahagahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha" some kid in the capsule said.

Luke sighed.

"Nice view, isn't it?" Somebody asked him.

Luke looked up to see Cape standing in front of him.

"Cape? What are you doing here?" Luke asked, standing up.  
"I followed you. I'm experienced in stalking people" Cape explained.  
"I felt your presence." Cape explained, looking out the window.

Luke and Cape stood side by side and watched over the London city together. The shitstorm could be seen coming from the west.

"So why aren't you with the others. Why'd you leave?" Cape asked.  
"I'd rather not say. I'm just going to keep quiet from now on. I can't be made fun of if I don't say anything." Luke said.  
"I never even asked to be on the show. I just got stuck on it, and now I have to deal with it"  
"Ok. I remember when I left. And the time after that. And the other time I left. And then the time I left for real. As I kept doing it, people cared less and less. My reputation got worse. I started becoming whiny, and no one cares about my girl problems." Cape said.  
"I used to look up to you. You used to be a haikuer of legends. Always had that sass, never afraid to lay down the facts. You were great." Luke said.

The capsule began its descent, and a smile crept on Cape's face.

"Yeah. I used to admire you too. In fact, I think you were the closest one I could relate too. The difference though, was that you never ran. You always stayed." Cape said.  
"Whatever." Luke said, letting out a sigh as he pressed his head against the glass.  
"The world needs a critic." Cape said.

Luke closed his eyes and thought about what to do. Cape backed up and turned around, walking away from him.

Gingerale crawled out of the sauna, completely red. Rydli dumped a bucket of hot water on him.

"Oops thought that was cold" Rydli said.

Gingerale winced. He tried to scream, but he was out of breath. He dropped his head and fainted.

"Alright, point for Team Jacob" Admin said.

A pendulum started swinging across the room.

"Oh so we're going through with Element's music tastes?" Marrowsky asked.

Just then, a window cracked. Everyone turned and watched as something flew through the window. A banana laid on the ground. Pantz picked it up.

"Likc the banana..." Mike urged.

Windows all around shattered as dozens of small beings flew through the windows. Minions swarmed around the haikuers.

"MINIONS AAAAAAAAA" Carz screamed, ripping his shirt off.

"oho dada hehehehe" a minion said.  
"yay!" a bunch of minions said, jumping on the haikuers.

The haikuers fell down and a bunch of minions grabbed Marrowsky, dragging him out the door.

"MARR MARR" J screamed, trying to run, but a minion grabbed his foot and J fell down.

"NOOOOO! NOT MINIONS!" Imboo screamed as a minion jumped on him.

The haikuers all ran for the door, kicking minion out of their way as they tried to escape.

"Hold on guys I saw Kingsman I know how to do badass things with my surroundings" Joe said.

Joe slapped a table and a bottle flew into her eye, knocking her into a wall where she ripped the blinds off a window.

Luke ran down a London street, heading for the Tower, when he saw a swarm of minions carrying Marrowsky. He stopped running and watched. He turned his attention to the Big Ben, where the man with the top hat could be seen guiding them. Luke ran for the Big Ben.

Blooberri, Sam, Robot, and Detective Pikachu ran for the Big Ben as well. As they neared it, they could see all of the haikuers heading towards them.

"Blooberri!" Pantz said.  
"Pantz!" Blooberri said.  
"Sam!" Jp said"  
"Cloud!" Sam said.  
"Robot!" no one said.  
"Ok can we skip the reunion we gotta find Marr Marr" Rydli said.

Cape walked up to the group.

"Oh yeah, hey guys. Guess who's back. That's right. Cape's back." Cape said, pretending not to be interested.

"Where did the minions go?" Jp asked.  
"Probably the Big Ben because the climatic scene always has to take place somewhere iconic" J said.  
"True fam now let's get em" Kirby said.

A bunch of minions grabbed onto Kirby and brought them down.

Sam and Robot ran inside the Big Ben. Blooberri tried to run with them but a minion leaped on her and started gnawing on her hair.  
Carz narrowed his eyes, and took a knife out. Carz picked the minion up and shanked it. Carz roared as he went around beating up minions.

"Hey, Cape" Nicholas snickered.  
"What?" Cape asked.  
"Come over" Nicholas giggled under his breath.  
"What?" Cape asked.  
"Come over" Nicholas repeated.  
"Come over where?" Cape asked.  
"Never mind, he doesn't get it. Come on Gingerale" Nicholas said, heading for the Big Ben.  
"Don't tell me what to do bitch" Gingerale replied passive aggressively as he followed him.

J, Alice, Lemon, Reu, Isaac, Mike, Berserker, and Riley followed.

"Oh hey Cape. Can you read this list for me." Mr. Moogle said, handing Cape a list.

Cape read the lines from the top.

"Nothing like a good fight."  
"Alright, I'm feeling it."  
"Man, what a bunch of jokers"  
"Let's not lose our heads, though."  
"We can definitely do this"  
"Good thing I'm here. No? Anyone?"  
"Let's press on and on and on"  
"But we mustn't be careless"  
"My rifle is getting hotter"  
"Why exactly am I reading these?" Cape asked.  
"Just keep going. Go on and on and on" Moogle said, amused.

"Alright guys. New plan. First one to ring the bell at the top of the Big Ben wins" Admin declared.  
"Oh shit come on then. Carz you hold off the minions while we climb" Cloud said, hurrying for the Big Ben.  
"Hold up, you're running too fast. I'm out of breath." StarForce wheezed, trying to keep up.  
"Omg StarForce you're such deadweight" Cloud facepalmed.

The top hat man ran up the stairs inside the Big Ben. Luke followed in close pursuit. At the bottom of the floor, more haikuers were running up the stairs.  
The top hat man jumped over a railing and started jumping from gears. Luke followed and watched his step as the inner workings of the clock moved spontaneously. He climbed from gear to gear and made sure not to get stuck.

As the other haikuers sped up the stairs, Berserker slowed down as he heard some muffled noises from a room. Berserker followed the noise and was lead to a door away from the staircase. He opened it and walked inside, where he found Ziggy strapped to a chair with his mouth taped shut. Berk walked over and untapped his mouth.

"Hey bro." Ziggy greeted.  
"What's going on? Why are you tied up? Is this some kind of porno..." Berserker wondered.  
"This weird guy came and tied me up. I couldn't see his face, he wore this weird mask. And he was obsessed with doge for some reason. But listen, he's after Marrowsky. I think he plans to do something with him. We gotta protect him!" Ziggy urged.  
"Oh. You guys aren't my teammates though. So.." Berserker said, putting the tape back on Ziggy's mouth and leaving the room.

The top hat man and Luke reached the roof of the Big Ben. Marrowsky laid unconsciously in the center.

"Ben." Luke said.

The man in the top hat turned around to see Luke standing on the other side.

"Lukeguy. I've been looking forward to this moment."

The wind blew harder as he started walking towards Luke, closing the gap. Alice, Lemon, Reu, Mike, Isaac, Cloud, and Pantz watched quietly from afar.

Carz and Blooberri looked up from the foot of the tower.

"What are you doing?" Luke asked.  
"I am finishing what he started. Lord Doge's legacy will live on in him. The memes are strong in him, I can feel it. I am going to transform him, into Marr Marr Binks." the man proclaimed.

Everyone gasped.

J ran as fast as he could. He bolted through the door and onto the roof of the Big Ben.

"MARR MARRRR!" J shouted, dashing for him.

A black minion punched J in the leg and made him fall down.

"Owner!" J said.

"Wait, a black minion?" Reu asked.  
"Minions can't be black this is an outrage" Isaac added.  
"WHY ARE THERE BLACK MINIONS RUNNING AFLOAT? WHAT'S NEXT, A GIRL MINION?" Mike shouted.

A female minion walked up and gave the black minion a smooch on the cheek.

Svenguyi busted out on the room.

"Heard you were talking trash on the progressive decisions this man made in hiring his minions" he said.

Gingerale and Nicholas ran past the group and toward J. Gingerale roundhouse kicked the black minion and Nicholas kicked the female minion in the nuts. She was immune, so she slapped Nicholas. They were the same height so it was easy.

The shitstorm got stronger, getting close to the clock tower.

"Don't worry Marr Marr, they're not going to turn you into a meme" J insisted.  
"Ugh J can you shut up already. Just ring the bell and win the challenge instead of whining about Marrowsky 24/7. Nobody gives a crap about your dumb anime or what you and Marrowsky talked about last night" Gingerale said.

J turned around and looked Gingerale straight in the eye.

"What's that? I don't speak little bitch." J said.

A large pain shot through Gingerale's body. He made a croaking noise and grabbed for his heart. He took a few steps back and and gasped for air. He tripped backwards and fell off the Big Ben.

"Haha owned" Nicholas said.

The female minion pinched Nicholas and then pushed him off the Big Ben.

As Gingerale fell to his death, he closed his eyes and prepared for impact.  
A glimmer of light blinked and Gingerale heard a rumble. He opened his eyes as he felt the warm embrace of a familiar friend. Garchomp Jesus held Gingerale in his arms as he dig his claws into the Big Ben. They slowly descended a bit, but Garchomp clenched the structure harder to keep them safely afloat.

"You came through..." He said.

Nicholas grabbed onto the big hand of the clock and hung on for dear life. He tried to do a pull-up but wasn't swoll enough. He looked down to see the impending drop.

Sam rushes forth, leaping at Luke and top hat guy.

"Sam, no! You're back?" Robot said with a Wharton mark for some reason?

Sam straightener his body as he soared for them. Luke dicked, and Sam rushed headfirst into the top hat Guy's torso. The man split into two parts as Sam went through him, keeping a grip on his torso.

"Did Sam just fucking kill that guy?" Alice asked.

Svenguyi roared, heading for Nicholas to kill him. She reached over the tower and saw him dangling. She was about to knock him down, when she heard a familiar voice beckon him.

"Hey" Cape shouted.

Svenguyi directed his attention toward Cape, standing 20 feet away, standing still.

"Coke over." he called out.

Svenguyi snarled and narrowed her eyes.

"No." he began.

He scraped his feet off the ground, preparing to take off. Cape stretched his fingers.

"I'M PHINEAS AND FEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRB" she roared, and the two charged for each other.

Luke and Sam removed the clothing from the parts of the top hat man, revealing three smaller minions.

"What the.." Luke said.

"Kevin. Stuart. Bob." Cloud explained, walking up.

Luke walked up to the bell and rang it, winning his team the challenge.

Other Troll Slaiyers started arriving at the roof.  
Mike ran for the clock. He looked over and saw Nicholas dangling.

"Mike! Help me!" Nicholas pleaded.  
"Mike wait! Think about what you're doing." Alice said.  
"Mike I'm about to FREAKING DIE!" Nicholas screamed in a high pitched voice.  
"Remember, Mike. You do not like the people I do n-ok screw this these Haikik jokes are starting to get forced, just save him" Alice said.

Mike unhooked his parachute and sliced the suspension lines off the links.

"Wow, you've been carrying that all day?" Isaac asked.  
"I play too much video games, it makes me take inventory a lot." Mike said.

He threw the canopy over the tower and Nicholas grabbed onto it. Mike, Alice, Lemon, Reu, and Isaac all grabbed onto a suspension line and pulled on it, trying to bring Nicholas over. The parachute started to tear. Nicholas held on dearly but the parachute ripped and he started to fall, but Mike grabbed his hand. Mike pulled him up and back onto the roof.

Cape and Svenguyi clashed, falling to the ground and rolling over, growling at each other.

"I'm going to KILL YOU" she snarled.  
"I'd like to see you try, bitch ;)" he teased.  
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHBHHHHHH I HATE DOGE" he screamed.

Svenguyi farted and they looked intensely into each other's eyes. Their mouths connected and they started to kiss. Closing their eyes, their tongues met a warm embrace. Cape's budge poked Svenguyi's leg, making him harder. Svenguyi turned Cape around and forced him down, laying I top of him.

"Do it, bitch. Come on, DO IT" he barked.  
"SHUT UP YOU DEGENERATE" Svenguyi barked back, thrusting into him.

Marrowsky woke up and saw the two doing it.

"Ew" he said, getting up and walking away.

Some police officers arrived at the scene.

"Alright, so we've heard some reports of small men terrorizing civilians. Who was in charge of this case?" the sheriff asked.  
"Pika! Pika Pikachu!" Detective Pikachu said excitedly.  
"You didn't do fucking anything" Sam complained.  
"Hold on, hold on, Detective Pikachu seems to know what's going on here. So from what we've heard, the criminals seem to be small and yellow creatures. Have you seen the culprits described as such?" The sheriff asked.  
"Pika! Pika Pika!" Detective Pikachu said.  
"What?" The sheriff asked.  
"Pikachu!" Detective Pikachu said, pointing at Bob, Steuart, and Kevin.  
"Aha! So it was you all along! You little rodent, you're gonna be doing some hard time, gov'nor" he said, carrying Pikachu off in handcuffs.

"Bottom" Kevin giggled.  
"Banana!" Bob said.

Lukeguy leaned over the railing and looked down over London, sighing. Alice leaned next to him. The shitstorm was still flinging shit around nearby buildings.

"What's wrong?" Alice asked.

"Nothing. I'm justg glad this day is ovet with" Luke said.

Marrowsky watched the two and thought for a moment.

[le flashback]

"Hey. Lukeguy. You're being kind of a dick." Marrowsky interrupted.

Lukegirl walked out of the bathroom with a chipper smile.

"Word of advice. Always agree with girls. It makes things easier." Marrowsky advised Cloud.

[le back to the future (present)]

"Hey, Lukeguy" Marrowsky said, approaching him.

Lukeguy turned around. Marrowsky looked at him and began.

"Sorry for calling you a dick this morning. You were right, about everyting. I shouldn't have been mean to you." Marrowsky said.

"Thanks" Lukeguy said.

The shitstorm subsided and a beautiful sun lit the sky, causing all of the gloomy clouds to disappear as optimistic Beatles music began to play.

"And with that said, I think we all learned something today" Admin said.

"Yeah, I think I learned its best not to help people and be a bystander when shittalking takes place." Lemon said.

"That's my boy" Alice smiled.

"And to avoid anymore of this nonsense, I herby due a new rule for all contestants to follow. From here on out, it is officially illegal to make fun of Lukeguy" Admin declared.

Everybody clapped in celebration.

"Ugh. You know what? ****guy, you're a nigger!" DryBones said.

Everybody's jaw dropped

"DryBones! WHAT DID I JUST SAY! Imboo, give DryBones his punishment" Admin ordered.

Imboo walked towards DryBones with a paddle.

"You know, I think this show is starting to get a bit more sophisticated" Luke smiled.

Element walked out of a public showrring place.

"Where is everyone? Did I miss anything?" Eleemnt asked.

Element then saw Carz shanking a minion and wearing it's goggles. Carz was covered in shit and blood. Blooberri smiled next to him.

"Hey Element" she greeted.

"So we get to see Star Wars now, right?" Lemon asked.

"Not exactly. The show was cancelled for some reason. But hey, I know another movie that's playing. And EVERYBODY gets to see it!" Admin said.

"Oh haha real funny ok yeah we all know where this is going" Alice sighed.

All of the haikuers, Admin, Imboo, Cape, and Svenguyi sat in the theater of Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Road Chip.

"At the end Dave reveals he never intended to propose to Samantha and then he ofically adopts the chipmunks" somebody screamed.

All of the haikuers groaned and tossed their popcorn buckets into the air.

The Chef Boyardee can rolled down the London streets as the haikuers boarded the plane.

"I gotta say I think the cinematic experience of Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Road Chip captured the magic and wacky antics of the original trilogy, but whoever spoiled that ending is a doof" Marrowsky said as he climbed the stairs.  
"Oh wow Road Chip and Star Wars releasing on the same day jokes, so original and trendy" Pseudonym reacted.  
"It's better than Finebros memes." Marrowsky retaliated.  
"What? I haven't seen much of those..." Pseudo shrugged as they both boarded the plane.

"Aww do we have to go already? We're gonna miss the rave!" Kirby said.  
"Ew UK raves sound like Flipnote hell, I'd rather have me some vaporwave hold the memes" Nicholas said.

Admin squirted Nicholas with water.

"Hey don't talk to the other team, only communicate with your own team. Otherwise nobody will ever memorize the teams" Admin warned.  
"You can talk to me if you want Nich-" Isaac began, but was cut off by Sam, who pushed them both onto the plane.  
"Move it or lose it, lesbians. I just want to pack someone home and get this day over with." Sam said.

The haikuers all got on the plane and were guided by Imboo to the dining area, where they sat with their respective teams.

"So, thankfully, Team Jacob is no longer kill" Admin said.  
"It's kinda kill" Alice said.  
"No longer kill" Admin insisted.  
"We saw a new change in the dynamic as we appointed an admin for each team, it brought in some interesting twists" Admin said.  
"Cloud didn't even do anything" Jp complained.  
"Yes." Admin replied apathetically.  
"You know, I think this would work better as a democracy. Take the Confederacy, for example. We vote for decisions of letting people on or kicking others out, I think it would work out well here" Rydli suggested.  
"Rydli these teams aren't chat rooms where you can just add and kick people these are teams. However I have come to the conclusion that the only way to put everyone on equal footing now is to...make everyone an admin." Admin said.  
"we're not making everyone an admin" Alice said.  
"I'm not talking about Haikik I'm talking about the teams there are no more double meanings in these events let's just stop kicking people randomly and kick people properly with votes. Everyone as an admin means no person is above another." Admin said.  
"That's kind of lame. I like being above everyone else" Rydli said.  
"Rydli I thought you liked the idea of a democracy" Admin reminded him.  
"Well yeah but somebody has to count the votes and decide on who to kick" Rydli said.  
"Rydli that's my job." Admin reminded him.  
"For now..." Rydli whispered.  
"Rydli." Admin said.  
"Anyways, we have clear losers here. I said it before I'll say it again. Rydli, Element, Pseudonym, Carz, Jp, Grenade, Ziggy, Shinxy, Cloud, Joe, Kirby, DryBones, Marrowsky, Mr. Moogle, Pantz, and StarForce are the losers. Cast your vote and send one of these fells packing" Admin said, dismissing the room.  
"Wait who won? I was taking a shower the whole time" Element said.  
"He just listed the losers, that must mean those not listed would be the winning team. Right, Elly?" Marrowsky asked.  
"Oh they are all on the same team? I thought it was just a bunch of random people who lost" Element said.

Admin banged his head off the steel wall.

"Come on there were a bunch of team dropouts and returnees today I had no idea what the fuck was going on" Element defended.  
"Yeah, that's why you didn't know" Pseudo said.

"Team Jacob. For winning, you get...ice cream! That's right. You all get ice cream. And a Beatles soundtrack signed by T.J. Miller HIMSELF!" Admin said.

Imboo speedily clapped next to him as he made the announcement.

Team Jacob members lined up for their ice cream as the Troll Slaiyers lined up to fill out their ballots.

"Can mine be tea flavored?" J asked.  
"Ok yeah sure whatever" Admin said.  
"Can mine be lemon flavored?" Lemon asked.  
"What do we look like a Japanese ice cream factory try asking for more normal colors Lemon" Admin scolded.

The Troll Slaiyers were gathered at the elimination ceremony.

"Sorry for the long wait, but it took a lot of prep to introduce phase two of our immunity symbol: Mountain Dew Code Red." Admin declared.

14 haikuers held a cool, crisp, Code Red in their hands. All but Shinxy and DryBones were safe. Admin held the final can on his pedestal.

"Both of you, are kind of annoying. Both of you, aren't the greatest competitors. Both of you, have pretty much done your role by now" Admin said.  
"I think Shinxy's sleeping" Pseudonym told Admin, Shinxy was snoozing next to him.  
"Wait am I still in this?" Kirby asked.  
"Yes Gluvr you are still in the game." Admin reminded.

Shinzy yawned as he woke up.

"Am I the sexy winner yet?!" Shinxy asked.  
"No, Shinxy. You might be going home. It's either you or DryBones." Admin explained.  
"ooooh. I'm better!" Shinxy said.  
"Hey what about the time I won the challenge in China! I'm a valuable member of the team! I can't go home yet, I need to see Japan!" DryBones reminded them.  
"ooooh, you're gonna be the l0000ser c:" Shinxy said to him.  
"I am not!" DryBones whined.  
"Settle down, problem children. It's sill anybody's game. Actually it isn't I don't know why I said that, the loser is already decided. Will it be Shinxy, the one who spends most of his time doing nothing and talking about African American?" Admin asked.  
"Niggers" Shinxy corrected.  
"Or DryBones, the ToiletFanatic longing for Japan who seems to have gone full fledged retard lately" Admin continued.  
"RUDE." DryBones pouted.  
"Unfortunately, we have to say goodbye to our beloved..." Admin began.  
"I don't know about you guys but I think either of these choices will rid the team of a some cancer, so it's a win win" Rydli said.  
"Come on, Shinxy's not that bad" Element defended.  
"Debatable" Moogle responded next to him.  
"What about me?" DryBones asked.  
"...Shinxy's not that bad" Element repeated.

"The final Mountain Dew goes.." Admin began.

The music intensified as DryBones shook in his seat.

The camera closed up on the Code Red Mountain Dew as cool water dropped off of it.

Shinxy was concentrating on a cloud outside the plane instead of the elimination.

"To..." Admin continued.

Pseudonym checked his watch.  
Cloud tried to too to look cool but he doesn't actually have one.

Grenade watched over DryBones as DryBones bit his fingernails.

Element started getting nervous and frowned as he looked at Shinxy.

Admin slowly tossed the can in the air and caught it over and over a few times as e smiled at the haikuers, waiting for the right time to announce the results. He took a glance at Shinxy, and then a glance at DryBones.

"Here's a hint. _ _ Y _ O _ _ _" Admin said.  
"FLYDOORS" DryBones screamed.  
"What? No..it was my clever way of saying DryBones. I thought of that just now. Amazing the way I can be so clever on the fly like that, huh. Makes me a wonderful admin, if I do say so myself." Admin said.  
"Wait so is he safe or eliminated?" Jp asked.  
"Oh yeah. Right. The final can goes to Shinxy. Here you go kitty kitty kitty" Admin said, tossing it to Shinxy.

Shinxy caught the can with his dick and opened it with his skull, the soda squirted all over his face.

"Cool" Joe said.

"What? Me? WHY!?" DryBones asked in frustration.  
"Dude you always get out early. You made some progress this time at least" Imboo assured him.  
"I didn't do anything wrong though. It's not like I messed up the challenge!" DryBones defended.  
"Well that's Admin's fault for making challenges where players can't actively make wrong decisions that could influence the team's vote easier" Moogle said.  
"Half the team left and the other half went to see Star Wars and didn't even go to it!" Admin said.

"THAT'S IT! I'M BREAKING THE RULES!  
12-year-olds cannot break this  
no fuck  
no f##k  
no shit  
no all  
no drawing everything  
no South Park  
no no  
no no no no no  
no hating anything  
no liking anything  
no 12-year-olds say shit  
no 200000000  
no suafhudsfasdugfsdahgfsadgfkjsadgfjksagdjfksagfjhsagjfkadgsjfhsgadjfksagdjfasgjfkhagsjhfs  
no copy and paste image URL  
no looking like a shit  
no using a toilet  
no filming a toilet  
no saying fuck uncensored  
no giving middle finger  
no middle finger ASCII  
no M  
no as  
no like  
no dislike  
no one under 13  
no speed  
no Glacier Gay  
no NoFlo  
no ShitSource  
no Glacier Bay  
no ProFlo  
no AquaSource  
no ahdsahfasdfsa  
no ahdsuhfifhsakfhawis  
no asdhfuasfsagdufksa  
no aufhewuihriewhfw  
no ahfuiehwwarfsad  
no Sudomemo memes  
no asking me an answer  
no faushdfiskafksa  
no afuhsadfs  
no asfuahwqrewqrqwrwqr  
no singing Japanese songs  
no karaoke  
no カラオケ  
no asking me question  
no being rude  
no being so fucking rude!  
no LEGO  
no y u no  
no dick  
no pussy  
no abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz  
no エー  
no ビー  
no シー  
no ディー  
no イー  
no エフ  
no ジー  
no エイチ  
no アイ  
no ジェー  
no ケー  
no エル  
no エム  
no エヌ  
no オー  
no ピー  
no キュー  
no アー  
no エス  
no ティ  
no ユー  
no ヴィ  
no ダブルユー  
no エックス  
no ワイ  
no ゼッド  
no fucking yourself  
go fuck yourself

Shows that got off Noggin/Nick Jr.:

Pinky Dinky Doo  
The Upside Down Show  
Little Bill  
Little Bear  
Franklin  
Wow! Wow! Wubbzy!  
Miss Spider's Sunny Patch Friends  
Maggie and the Ferocious Beast  
Gullah Gullah Island  
Oobi  
Yo Gabba Gabba!  
Ni Hao, Kai-lan

Holy shit!

¡Hola! Soy Dora. Today, I will fuck your ass!

I'M GOING TO GO HOME AND FUCK ALL OF YOUR MOMS IN THE ASS XDDD"

"What is happening right now" Moogle asked.

"SHOVE A DICK IN YOUR ASS SHIT TIT BANG POOPY FACE XD" DryBones screamed.

"Hey...I'm not a shit tit bang poopy face..." Moogle said.

"SUCK MY PREPUBESCENT DICK FAGGOTS YOU ALL ARE EGOTISTICAL ASSHOLES I'M GONNA REPORT YOU TO THE ADMIN AND HET RID OF YOH ALL DIE DIE DIE AAAAH FUCK TOY FUCK YOUF IXM YOU FIR DOE ASSHOLE WHYPOIUYUUUSOAOAOAKSHDBS LITTLE BILL SHOT CUNT SHOT FICK AAAAA" DryBones screamed.

"Oh my stars..." StarForce gasped.

"DryBones if you're not going to be mature about this you should probably just leave now" Admin said.

Imboo grabbed DryBones by both hands and dragged him towards the door.

"YOU'RE ALL NOOBS! NOOOOOOBS! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOBS!" DryBones screamed at the top of his lungs.

"ok andre" Cloud said.

"Can you at least drop me off in Japan?" DryBones asked.  
"We're sending you back down to the races because 2012 is where you belong" Admin said.

With a night swing, Admin pulled out the hammer. He flipped it before whacking DryBones with it, sending him flying out the plane door.

"Wow. That does feel nice" Admin said, feeling the hammer admirably.

"Wait, what about the parachute?" Imboo asked.  
"Oh yeah." Admin said.

Admin picked up the parachute on the ground and threw it out of the plane for DryBones to catch.

"He was gay jej" Shinxy said.  
"Haha yeah. Well I'm gonna go fap or Smash or both. Probably both." Cloud said, getting up and walking out of the room.  
"Still can't believe we missed Star Wars" Element said.  
"It's ok they're making a Lego version of the movie" Pseduo reassured him.  
"Yes" Element pumped his fist.

As the haikuers exited the room, Grenade felt empty inside.

[Grenade in le confession toilet]  
"Well. DryBones is gone. Less and less haikuers for me to play off of. Oh well. I'll try helping the team I guess."  
[le end]

Team Jacob was having a good time in first class.

Lukeguy was eating ice cream.

Nicholas, Isaac, and Gingerale were sitting together at a booth against the wall.

"Hey guys today I-" Isaac began before being cut off.  
"Good thing Garchomp Jesus came in handy today. Sure was a life saver. We made a good choice in having him as our mascot" Garchomp said.  
"You know, it makes me wonder if it gives it team kind of an unfair advantage" Isaac said.  
"Well don't they have Bless' OC on their team" Gingerale said.

The Troll Slaiyers were laying around in the loser area. Tim popped in with a bag of kush.

"Hey dawgs anyone want a bj?" Tim asked.  
"Tom go away" Jp said.  
"It's Tim bitch. How about we 69?" Tim suggested.  
"Tim please nobody likes you" Jp said.  
"Can't you make your own bitches appear?" Pantz asked.  
"I can but they never want to fuck me :/" Tim sighed.  
"Tim can you do something useful? Maybe you can make us candy or something. That would be cool" Jp suggested.  
"Hey yeah I'd dig that dawg" Pantz agreed.  
"Aight here you go" Tim said, clapping his hands.

The room started raining corn.

"Oops sorry. I'll be frank I'm kind of high right now" Tim said.

"You know who would have made a better Pokémon mascot for our team..." Nicholas started.  
"Nicholas don't act like that, none of us could have predicted that would happen. It's not like he's the only one in existence" Gingerale said.  
"He has sentimental value, Gingerale. He was my bby..." Nicholas said.  
"Hey, Nicholas!" someone shouted.

The table turned their heads as Mike approached them, dragging two halves of a body to them. A trail of blood followed as Mike picked them up and dropped Grovyle's upper and lower bodies onto the table.

"I know you like Grovyle, so, I wanted to get him back for you! So we can say goodbye and have a Satanic ritual maybe?" Mike asked.

Nicholas was crying as he looked over Grovyle's dead body. Isaac placed his fingers on Grovyle's eyelids and closed them shut. Mike traced his fingers along Grovyle's body and licked the blood odd hid fingers.

"Juicy!" Mike said.

[Gingerale in le confession toilet]  
"Garchomp Jesus is still the better choice. I mean, maybe if Grovyle took a page out of his book and decided to become a Grovyle Jesus he would revive himself and we wouldn't be in this predicament. But whatever. I'm going to fuck the Garchomp. It might take some time though, the key is tricking him into thinking I am a Pokémon so he will mate with me. I've been practicing my Pokémon speak. Here's a sample"  
Gingerale cleared his throat.  
"Gre"  
[le end]

Marrowsky entered the backroom once more and closed the door behind him. J was sitting on a box awaiting his arrival.

"Senpai! Hey Marr~ I got you some ice cream. There's some tea flavored, and then some snickers flavored." J said, placing two bowls on the floor.  
"Nice, kohai. I am feeling kind of hungry" Marrowsky noted.  
"You're not you when you're hungry!" J said.  
"Yeah. But, thanks. This looks great" Marrowsky said, taking a spoonful of the snickers flavored ice cream.  
"Yeah. Maybe we can mix them together and call them the Senpi Special" J said.  
"That would be something. But, Jonah. You know, the teams are starting to put more emphasis on not making contact with opposing players" Marrowksy reminded him.  
"I trespass onto school grounds in the middle of the night to steal wifi, I'm not exactly a rule follower. But, Nick and Ginge Cringe have started to crack down on me talking about you, so I've been making an effort to tone it down. It's ok, though, we can still meet here though. Right, senpai?" J asked.  
"Definitely. Of course!" Marrowsky said.

They both picked up a bowl of tea flavored ice cream and clanged their bowls together as they each took a bite form the respective ice cream.

[Rydli in le confession toilet]  
Rydli casually inspected his fingernails.  
"Oh, yes. Seems there has been quite a disturbance today, hm? Curious as to what really riled it up? Oh, I don't know if I should say."  
Rydli snickered.  
"Alright, you got me. Yeah, I did it. It was me, all me. That's right. I'm a monster. I caused the rift. It was me. For it was I who spoiled Alvin and the Chipmunks The Road Chip for everyone at the theater!"  
Rydli laughed maniacally and shook his hands as he turned his head towards the ceiling.  
[le end]

"29 haikuers remain. Where will the haikuers be culturally insensitive next? How will the Troll Slaiyers bounce back after losing their beloved DryBones? Will the next episode take another month to come out? Find out next time on HAIKU! DRAMA! ISLAND! No, wait. Action? Oh no, World Tour, yeah. Season 3." Admin closed off.

End of Day 187  
Initiation at 28.95%  
19-7-4 / 15-14-17-19-26-11 / 8-18 / 18-19-8-11-11 / 14-20-19 / 19-7-4-17-4


	13. Mated

Chapter 12: [Mated]

Shinxy was sleeping on Element's lap. Element tried to move but Shinxy clung on too hard.

"So, Elemenr. You and Shinxy a thing yet?" Rydli asked.  
"No...I've said this before, Rydli. I don't like online dating" Element explained.  
"Oh, then what do you like? What was it that you like doing? For the lulz?" Rydli asked.  
"Die" Element replied.

[Element in le confession toilet]  
"Rydli's been such a dick lately. All of these constitution jokes and callbacks to my past just make me want to stick a hard copy of the constitution up his ass"  
[le end]

"Rydli you're a gay bitch who eats ass" Element insulted.  
"No u" Rydli shot back.

Rydli's no u thrusted Element out of his seat and against the wall.

"Cool" Joe said.

"Enough of those faggots, huh." Cloud said, edging Pantz with his arm.  
"So uh, Pantz. How's it going? You come here often?" Cloud asked.  
"Hey Cloud thanks for the blowjob last night" Ziggy butter in.  
"Ziggy you autistic faggot get out of here nobody likes you" Cloud said.  
";_;7" Ziggy said, running away crying.  
"Wow what a dick" Pantz said.  
"Yeah I know right, we were having a conversation and he just walked right in" Clpud said.  
"No I mean you. Being a little bitch." Pantz said.  
"What!?" Cloud asked.  
"You don't just call someone autistic like that what are you an edgy 4chan douchebag?" Pantz asked.  
"Lapras Fucker actually. And I didn't mean to say autistic I actually called him artistic, but my accent got in the way" Cloud explained bullshittedlly.  
"Fool!' Black people don't have accents!" Pantz said.  
"Cricket" Cloud said.  
"Damn you're right I tried to say crikey but j couldn't"  
"Yeah, well excuse me while I go try to find a role in the story" Pantz said, getting up and walking away.

Cloud sighed.

[Cloud in le confession toilet]  
"Perhaps hte only way into Pntz' heart, is to smash my way through..."  
[le end]

"Having girl trouble, Cloudy boy?" Rydli asked, sitting on the bench across from him.  
"Pantz is no girl. She's a woman. Also no." Cloud replied.  
"You know what would be a good idea? Take her on a sushi date. Girls never say no to a sushi date." Moogle suggested.  
"What? Not everyone likes sushi." Marrowsky argued.  
"Ok well let's ask the girls. Jp. If a guy asked you on a sushi date, would you say yes?" Moogle asked.  
"No. I don't like sushi." Jp replied.  
"Ok well what if it was Stickboy, you'd go on a sushi date then right?" Moogle asked.  
"Well, no, I'd go somewhere else" Jp said.  
"Oh come on you'd totally go for sushi if he asked to." Moogle insisted.  
"But I don't like sushi" Jp said.  
"Never mind, never mind, hey Joe. If someone asked you on a sushi date, would you say yes?" Moogle asked, turning his direction to her.  
"No" Joe replied.  
"What to heck, what is happening right now? I don't think you guys are being honest. You'd definitely go on a sushi date" Moogle insisted.  
"Why are you so wrapped around sushi all of a sudden?" Rydli asked.  
"I'm just saying, if you ask a girl to go on a sushi date, she'd be like "oh wow, this person has such exquisite taste and cultural awareness" compared to, say, asking her out for a burger or chicken parm." Moogle said.  
"Nothing wrong with a nice chicken parm" Cloud defended.  
"Hold on Cloud this conversation is for users who haven't abandoned haiku" Rydli said.  
"Milk yourself Rydli I post sick shitposts all the time and this whole conversation is concerning me anyways" Cloud said.  
"We're losing track, guys." Moogle said.  
"This went off track when you brought up sushi" Marrowksy said.  
"Ok, look." Moogle began.

Pantz walked back into the room.

"Ok, Pantz. If I asked you on a sushi date, would you say yes" Moogle asked.  
"No" Pantz said.  
"Alright fine. If Bradley Cooper asked you on a sushi date, would you go?" Moogle followed up.  
"Who is Bradley Cooper?" Pantz asked.  
"Who is Bradley Cooper?" Moogle repeated with an astonished expression.  
"You don't know who Bradley Cooper is?" Rydli asked stunned.  
"No, who is he?" Pantz asked.  
"He's in like, everything. How do you not know who Bradley Cooper is?" Pseudonym asked.  
"I don't know, okay. I just don't know who Bradley Cooper is." Pantz said.  
"You guys talking about Bradley Cooper?" Ziggy walked in, zipping up his pants.  
"Pantz doesn't know who Bradley Cooper is" Rydli explained.  
"YOU DON'T KNOW WHO BRADLEY COOPER IS? Bradley Cooper is a gorgeous man" Ziggy said.  
"Who doesn't know who Bradley Cooper is?" Admin asked, walking into the room.  
"Look maybe if she saw a picture of him she would recognize him" Jp suggested.  
"He's the furry dude from Guardians of the Galaxy and The Hangover." Marrowsky said.

Jp shower Pantz a portrait of Bradley Cooper she had in her pocket.

"Ok so if this guy asked you on a sushi date, would you go?" Moogle asked.  
"I don't get it why does Bradley Cooper want to take me on a sushi date?" Pantz asked.  
"The point is you would go because he's attractive, right?" Moogle asked.  
"No I just found out who he is like 5 minutes ago" Pantz explained.  
"Look, what I'm saying is that girls dig guys who are cultural. When they see you're interested in sushi, they'll think your tastes are rich and exotic" Moogle explained.  
"Ok but I don't like sushi" Pantz pleaded.  
"But you would go if someone you like asked you to go right?" Moogle asked.

"What's going on here?" Kirby asked.  
"Moogle's asking Pantz out on a sushi date" Ziggy explained.  
"Wow really?" Kirby asked.  
"No, I don't like sushi" Pantz tried to explain.  
"Congratulations, Moogly. Hope you two have a wonderful evening!" Kirby said.  
"I don't know what just happened." Moogle said, looking around.  
"Why are we talking about sushi again?" Grenade asked, back against the wall, ready to give it his all.  
"I think Bradley Cooper asked Pants out on a date" Kirby said.  
"Ok look, so I was reading this article with research conducted by Helen Fisher." Moogle explained.  
"HELEN?!" Cloud asked with interested eyes.

Moogle took his phone out and opened the article, reading to the rest of his team.

"If you want a second date, make sure the first date involves sushi.  
The magical combination of raw fish, wasabi and seaweed increases your odds of getting a second date by 170 percent, according to the annualSingles in America survey of 5,500 unattached Americans ages 18 to 70, conducted by dating site , biological anthropologist Helen Fisher and evolutionary biologist Justin R. Garcia, both researchers at Indiana University's Kinsey Institute. Sushi is adventurous" Moogle read.

"Well then. Can't argue with Helen Fisher" Pseudonym admitted.

"So, in brief, Moogle wants to take Pantz on a sushi date" Rydli summarized.

"I don't remember that" Moogle said.

"That definitely came up" Element added.

"Element." Moogle said blankly.

"Hope you guys have fun on your sushi date" Jp said, patting Pantz on the back.

"What..." Cloud's jaw dropped.

"Hey Carz" StarForce greeted.

"GRAND DAD" Carz screamed.

"I was wondering if you'd be interested in my rp company. For just a small amount I can hook you up with some furries who will provide some sexual roleplay" StarForce suggested.

"Grand dads. Meet the Grand dads.

They're the modern stone age family.  
From the town of Bedrock,  
They're a page right out of history.

Let's ride with the family down the street.  
Through the courtesy of dad's two feet.

When you're with the Grand dads.  
Have a yabba dabba doo time.  
A dabba doo time.  
We'll have a gay old time. " Carz sang.

"What happened to minions?" StarForce asked.  
"Like I said, the minions would die out. We are in a new age now. The modern Stone Age." Pseudo explained to StarForce.  
"And one that isn't shit" Element added.  
"FLEENSTONES" Carz shouted.

[StarForce in le confession toilet]  
"Boy, I sure am behind on some of these haiku trends. I'll have to catch up with everyone"  
[le end]

Meanwhile, Nicholas was watching libertarian videos on YouTube.

"Taxation is theft" he declared.  
"Alright Nicholas enough with the Mumbai, what really matters is how I'm going to get my penis inside of this Garchomp" Gingerale said.  
"Yeah that seems like the more pressing issue to me as well" Lemom agreed.  
"Ew someone who isn't part of the core group, go away" Gingerale said with a disgusted tone.

Lemon made the okay meme face and sadly walked away.

Gingerale tried to lift Garchomp Jesus' tail but it whacked him with it, tossing Gingerale across the room and smashing him against the wall.

J walked in wearing sandals and a hula skirt.

"J I don't think we're going to Hawaii" Robot said, sitting near a window.  
"What? Hawaii? This is one of my normal outfits. Hawaii would be kawaii though~" J murred.  
"J, dude, come on. You look like shit. We're supposed to be a badass team and you're over here looking like a little bitch" Sam mocked.  
"Ya think so? I was going for more of a daddy's whore vibe" J explained.  
"Hey slu*ts" Mike said as he walked by, gathering at a table seated by Madorky and Lemon.  
"Haha, oh Mike, man oh man, loving you Mike" J laughed.

[J in le confession toilet]  
"Man Mike is such a cool guy. I'll never forget the time we became friends"

[le flashback]  
"Hey Mike want to be friends?" J asked.  
"Ok" Mike replied  
[back to le present]

"I can't believe Mike agreed to be friends, I'm so happy! We should totally hang out and stuff"  
[le end]

Mike sat down next to Madorky at the table.

"Hoes" he greeted.  
"Neutral Milk Hotel" Madorky replied.  
"More like Neutal Milk...yo, tell, me where I can get an album of that" Lemon joked.  
"Shitpost" Mike said.

J walked up to the gang, laughing at nothing.

"Hey guys, how's it going? Stoked for the challenge today?" J asked.  
"Yeah, could be fun. :)" Lemon said.  
"Shitpost" Mike said.  
"I am Madorky" Madorky said.  
"Haha, true. Mike you're so cool. You know what would be cool? If we, like, hung out maybe? I just think you're pretty rad and I could show you my earring collection if you'd be interested" Lemon suggested.  
"Ok" Mike replied.  
"Wow ok woo can't wait, haha you're so cool" J laughed.  
"Cool" Lemon said.  
"Something that isn't offensive" Madorky added.

Riley was having sex with a hot pocket.

Admin walked into the first class.

"Hey guys. We're almost ready to land at our next destination. Meet in the lower class for more information" Admin announced.  
"YES ARE WE GOING TO NEW YORK?" J asked, jumping up and down.  
"No New York is smelly we'll probably go somewhere with more class like Mexico City first." Admin said.  
"Ew we might see Charly" Alice disgust.  
"He's willing to look at CP tbh" Nicholas said.  
"Hey watch out, pedophilia is the newest activist movement" Isaac said.  
"Alright so as I was saying before you guys somehow turned that conversation from going to the other room to pedophile rights, go to the other room" Admin ordered.

They did.

The Troll Slaiyers and Team Jacob were grouped respectively. J looked over at Marrowsky.

"Hey Marr Marr~" he waved.  
"What's Marrowsky's name anyways?" Robot asked.  
"Marrowsky" Sam replied, shaking his head at Robot's silly question.

"Today, victims, we will be going to the city of love" Admin said with a smile.  
"Detroit" Pseudonym noted.  
"Ew we might see Rydli there" Ziggy disgust.  
"I'm right here." Rydli reminded him.  
"Oh yeah. Gay tbh" Ziggy said.  
"Or Luna. Luna is also a character we may run into" Lemon said.  
"Yeah but Luna is..." Alice started and everyone shrugged their shoulders.

"We aren't going to Detroit. We can only go to so many disappointing United States areas. We are actually going to the great state of France, Rome." Admin said.  
"You mean Paris, France?" Rydli corrected.  
"How do you know there are plenty of places on French we could have gone" Admin said.  
"Right but-"  
"Yo Ryds. Not now. Today's challenge will be full of love and compassion 3" Admin said.

[Sam in le confession toilet]  
"Well today sounds like it's going to be fucking gay as hell. Good thing we have J he has just enough faggotry to help us win"  
[le end]

"Today's challenge will have you paired up with a romantic partner. You must work well with your partner and demonstrate as strong a bond as possible. Whichever team generally has the best couples, judged by me and Imbobobobobobobo, will be the winners" Admin explained  
"Yo but Adman, there's like, not enough girls and guys to get it y'fig?" Pantz said.  
"Yeah well we have been running short on girls, and the few we had turned into guys. But that's not an issue, gay marriage is legal now. You're all bisexual right?" Admin asked.  
"No" Moogle answered.  
"Alright so since everyone is bisexual we'll just have some gay couples. No problems with that" Admin declared.  
"But I'm not gay! I just wish I am!" Rydli said.  
"Just hang out with J he can turn people gay apparently" Moogle said.

[Element in le confession toilet]  
"Wow, a romantic challenge with partners. I wonder who I'm going to be paired up with. Hmm. Now who could it be...not sure...  
[le end]

"Hold on, both teams have an odd number of members" Robot noticed.  
"What? Where's Lukeguy?" Lemon asked.  
"He got kicked off for not singing" Admin explained.  
"What. I don't remember a ding. You sure he isn't pulling a Rhythm?" Rydli asked.  
"No, he didn't sing. He left. Apparently getting yourself off the show is a lot easier than it looks." Admin said.  
"Wow so Element just sucks at removing himself?" Moogle asked.  
"I guess so" Element said.

[Element in le confession toilet]  
"I'm way past getting kicked off anyways. I'm in it to win it. I got the eye of the Shinx. An Arcanine would be a better analogy but I really like Shinx"  
[le end]

"Hey can I leave too?" Madorky asked.  
"No." Admin said.  
"All we have to do is not sing right?" Madorky asked.  
"We aren't having anymore dropouts guys" Admin said.  
"But technically speaking if I don't sing-"  
"Ok if you eliminate yourself I will drop you off in Mexico where you will be stuck with Charly" Admin threatened.

Alice pondered the severity of that punishment.

"So yeah, both teams have an odd member of teammates. So one person of each team will have to be the forever alone guy. So instead of dating someone that person will probably just masturbate all day" Admin explained.  
"Sounds like an average day for me" Cloud shrugged.  
"We'll pair people up based on the amount of charisma we believe they have with each other. Or something random for the lols I don't know here are the matchups" Admin said, walking by everyone with a clipboard.

[Lemon in le confession toilet]  
"The shipping episodes, yes! This should be really fun. And my ship has always been Lemon X Everyone, so anyone I get should be cool"  
[le end]

"For Team Jacob we had Mike and J" Admin started.

"Wow what are the odds of that. I was just talking about how cool it would be to hang out and now we're paired up. This should be so much fun! Friends for life haha!" J said.  
"Ok" Mike said.

"Berserker and Blooberri" Admin continued.

"Oh. Cool." Berserker said.  
"Nice, we should do pretty good" Bloo said.

"Robot and Sam" Admin continued.

"Aw, sweet. The dynamic fucking duo" Sam cheered.

"Alice and Reu" Admin continued.

"What? Alice. What do we have in common?" Reu asked.  
"I don't know Reu isn't that what we're supposed to find out during the date?" Alice asked.  
"Uh yeah sure. Cool." Reu said.

"Riley and Nichilas" Admin son inured.

"Ew" Nicholas said.

[Riley in le confession toilet]  
"Oh swag. It's that guy that called me annoying and kicked me out that one time. Seems like a nice guy"  
[le end]

"And finally, Gingerale and Isucc" Admin continued.

"Wow cool, I'm sure we'll be great together since we're pals and all" Isaac proposed.  
"Huh? Oh yeah sure" Gingerale said.

"Hey wait up you forgot-oh..." Lemon realized.  
"Congrats, Lem. Your date is your hand" Admin said, patting his shoulder.

"Now for the Troll Slaiyers" Admin began.

"Rydli and Jp" Admin said.

"oh" Jp said.

Rydli smiled at Jp.

[Jp in le confession toilet]  
"I already have a boyfriend so I'm not really into this, but I'll do my best for the team"  
[le end]

"Kirby and Grenade" Admin continued.

"Cool" Grenade said.  
"Wait am I still in this?" Kirby asked.

"Pseudonym and Carz" Admin continued.

"AAAAAAAAAAA" Carz screamed.  
"riveting" Pseudonym said.

"Pantz and Moogle" Admin continued.

Cloud's jaw dropped.

[Mr. Moogle in le confession toilet]  
"Uh this is legal right?"  
[le end]

"Joe and Ziggy" Admin continued.

Joe and Ziggy looked at each other awkwardly.

Shinxy hugged Element tightly as Admin walked by, rubbing his head against Element's crotch.

"Element and Marrowsky" Admin continued.

"grr?" Shinxy asked, falling off Element.

Marrowksy walked up to Element.

"Oh, this should be...interesting" Marrowsky said.

"And finally, StarForce and Shinxy" Admin finished.

"Yay! Shinxy we get to work together. This should be fun you're a pretty cool guy huh" StarForce said eagerly.  
"yeah" Shinxy said simply.

"And that leaves Cloud as the lonely one with no date" Admin said.

"OK FINE I SEE HOW IT IS YOU'RE ALL NERDS I WOULDN'T DATE ANYWAYS I FLY SOLO ASSHOLES" Cloud shouted.

[Cloud in le confession toilet]  
"Honestly this is pretty cool. I'm the only one without a date so there's no way I can hurt the team's performance. I get to fap and be rewarded for it."  
[le end]

The plane crashed into a church, le right wing chopped off and all of le haikuers fell out of the door and piled up on each other.

"Alright contestants, take your date on a date. Le better le date goes, le better chances you have of winning le overall challenge" Admin proclaimed, climbing down le pile of haikuers.

[Isaac in the confession toilet]  
"Oh no, le hardest challenge yet...social interaction..."  
[the end]

"A date? No problem. Jp I'm a master of le smooth. We got this in the hole." Rydli said, getting up and offering Jp a hand.

Jp grabbed Rydli's hand and stood next to him.

"Alright" Jp said.

[Rydli in the confession toilet]  
"Alright. Alright? That's all she had to say. Geez might as well kick me in le nuts. I hate when people just respond with "okay" or "alright". Ugh"  
[the end]

[Pseudonym in the confession toilet]  
"A date, huh? What do people in French eat again? Snails? And my date is Carz. This is going to blow"  
[the end]

[Sam in the confession toilet]  
"I'm the master of bitches, so I'm going to go great in this challenge, as usual, and win"  
[the end]

Sam picked Robot up.

"Hey wanna suck my cock?" Sam proposed.

"Damn I wish I had moves like Sam" Lemon admired, snapping his fingers.

Element and Marrowsky started walking down le street, getting away from the rest of le team so they could get some privacy for sex. Shinxy followed, latching onto Element's leg, but Element shrugged him off.

"No Shinxy, my partner is Marrowksy. Go play with StarForce" Element said.

"Hey Shinxy! Haha we're gonna have so much fun. Let's go eat a bagel or something hahahahaha" StarForce yelled excitedly.

Someone bumped into Element.

"Oh, sorry, didn't see you there guy" the guy apologized.  
"It's alright" Element reassured.  
"Wait a minute, hold on. That fedora you're wearing...your attraction of Shinxes..."  
"Shinx is still le plural actually" Marrowsky corrected.  
"Are you...Shinx_Fucker!?" le guy asked.  
"Oh, why yes I am" Element smiled, standing confidently.  
"How does he know you, exactly?" Marrowksy asked.  
"This guy. THIS GUY. He's only le mod of r/pokemon. How could I NOT know him?" le guy explained.  
"Wow so Reddit exists in France too? I think we're going to get along just fine" Element smiled.  
"Element, we should probably be focusing our time on each other" Marrowsky advised.  
"Yeah, yeah, but I gotta give this guy an autograph first" Element said.  
"Did somebody say Shinx_fucka?" a French guy asked in the background.  
"You really built a name for yourself, huh?" Marrowksy asked.

[Element in the confession toilet]  
"I saw an opening for more on r/pokemon and applied, they let me in so here I am. I guess more people know about me than I realized  
[the end]

Shinxy turned around sadly, walking past StarForce and sighing, then falling down because he used too much energy walking 10 steps. Nicholas noticed and approached him.

"Hey, Shinxy. You can hang out with us if you want" Nicholas offered.  
"Huh? What about us?" Riley asked.  
"Yeah no one cares Riley" Nicholas brushed off.  
"You can't mingle with players on le other team!" Riley complained.  
"Shut up Riley holy heck no one cares" Nicholas yelled.  
"Don't you think it's a bit hypocritical to penalize J for wanting to talk to Marrowsky but now you're here talking to someone from the other team as well?" StarForce asked.

Nicholas grabbed Riley's glasses and threw them at StarForce, making him flinch. Le glasses fell to le ground, le lenses cracking.

"Hey! Those cost $2.75!" Riley complained, leaning down and picking up le glasses.

[Nicholas in the confession toilet]  
"Shonxy seemed lonely after Element constantly dowsing him, I just wanted to help him out...besides, it was Gingerale who had a problem with J and Marrowksy, not I, Nucholas"  
[the end]

Berserker and Blooberri were walking towards a bakery.

"So, would you say France has more of a Beauty and le Beast or Hunchback of Notre Dame feel?" Blooberri asked.  
"Shrek 3" Berserker answered.  
"Wow me too. Us New Yorkers think le same don't we?" Bloo smiled.

Reu and Alice walked by.

"Hey Reu, would you say France has more of a Beauty and le Beast or Hunchback of Notre Dame feel?" Blooberri yelled to him.  
"I don't know, Hunchback? Beauty and le Beast is more of a humble providence with a French culture but Hunchback is actually at some famous France landmarks" Reu answered.  
"He's not one of us" Bloo sighed, she and Berserker walking away from the bakery.

"Want some baguettes?" Alice asked.  
"Sure" Reu said.  
"Alright I don't have any money though can I borrow some?" Alice asked.  
"Fine" Reu sighed, reaching in his pocket and pulling out a wallet, handing Alice a $20 bill.

As Alice approached le baguette stand, a hand lurched out and grabbed Reu's shoulders, turning him around.

"REU? Where have you been?" Caesar asked.  
"Oh. Uh, China, Transylvania, London..." Reu said.  
"Have you been practitioners your hamon?" Caesar asked.  
"Not really" Reu answered.  
"You fool!" Caesar yelled, punching Reu and knocking him on le ground.  
"Come with me, Reu. We must train you for the impending doom approaching us" Caesar said, grabbing Reu and helping him up.  
"But I'm kind of doing something with someone right now" Reu complained.  
"No one cares Reu let's face it this will be more interesting than whatever you had planned" Caesar argued.  
":(" Reu said.

Caesar dragged Reu away as Alice returned with le baguettes, looking around for him.

"Reu? REU! RYU! WRU! WRY!" Alice screamed.

MOGLA and Pantz were walking around looking for a place to eat.

"So, what are you in le mood for? Sushi perhaps?" Moogle proposed.  
"Dude I don't want sushi we're not in Japan let's get some French food like fries or something man" Pantz suggested instead.  
"Alright, fine." Mr. Moogle caved.

"Here in France we have only le best fries. McDonald's fries" le cashier at McDonald's spoke to le two.

Cloud walked through le McDonald's doors, keeping an eye on Moogle and Pantz and gritting his teeth.

[Cloud in the confession toilet]  
"This whole matching system Admin had was totally bullshit. Moogle is a honky and Pantz is a non-honky, they have nothing in common. Truly le ideal way to choose who dates Pantz should have been a duel to le death. Last time me and Moogle dueled, he revealed his penis to le world.  
[the end]

Lemon walked into McDonald's next. He tried walking past Cloud but Cloud stood in his path.

"Oh sorry bro. You trying to get through?" Cloud asked, stepping to le right.  
"THANX BRO OFTO" Lemon thanked with a thumbs up, stepping forward but bumping into Cloud, who repositioned himself in front of Lemon.

Lemon tried going around Cloud but Cloud sidestepped and blocked his path again.

"What's up bro? What's up?" Cloud asked.  
"Bonjour" Lemon replied.  
"Get your pimply face out of here Lemon McDonald's doesn't need scum like you" Cloud threatened.  
"Hey Cloud look it's Goku" Lemon said, pointing behind Clpud.  
"Le Gokester?!" Cloud asked eagerly, turning around, letting Lemon walk by him.

[Lemon in the confession toilet]  
"Cloud's been acting normal around lately. He's such a nerd. Ha owned B)"  
[the end]

Several haikuers were sitting outside a cafe, including Gingerale, Isaac, Grenade, Kirby, Ziggy, and Joe.

Pseudonym walked up to le cafe, holding a leash. Carz, attached to le leash, tried running in another direction, screaming "GILVASUNNER". Psueodnym tugged on le leash, pulling Carz towards him as he sat at a table.

"So, Gingerale, what have you been interested in lately?" Isaac asked, trying to start a conversation.  
"Huh, uh cheese" Gingerale answered, half paying attention as he looked around trying to find someone.  
"Come on Gingerale, we should try getting to know each other. I think it will help us in le challenge" Isaac said.  
"Alright sure what do you want to know?" Gingerale asked.  
"What's your favorite kind of bread?" Isaac asked.  
"My favorite kind of bread? Who would ever want to know that?" Gingerale asked back.  
"I'm just trying to think of things that will give us a better understanding of each other, something that could test our relationship in le future if we know or not what their partner likes" Isaac explained  
"But bread?" Gingerale asked again.

[Gingerale in the confession toilet]  
"Granted it's whole wheat, but if bread is a conversation starter for you, you need to get a life. Now excuse me while I go show everyone my stash of Lapras porn"  
[the end]

"Vous êtes si belle pour une fille qui est la graisse" Rydli spoke fluently as he kissed le hand of a lady, causing her to giggle.

A group of ladies swooned over Rydli as Jp sat at a nearby table, bored.

"Rydli don't you think you're forgetting something?" Jp asked.  
"Ah yes. Ladies, would you care to listen to a classical piece?" Rydli asked, taking a violin out of his suitcase and playing a tune.

"Rydli!" All le girls squeezed.

From a nearby table, Riley took notice.

"Whatever, I can get any girl I want too." Riley flipped his hair, unimpressed by Rudeli's actions.

A girl walked by and Riley jumped out in front of her.

"Hey girl, Riley, but you can call me name. You lookin pretty bomb" Riley complimented.  
"Vous êtes si insensible à l'aide d'un terme comme celui" she responded, slapping Riley's face.  
"She said you were insensitive, probably because you used le word bomb" Rydli kindly explained as he continued to play the violin.

"Wow everything is offensive nowadays" Riley sighed.  
"Also you're just retarded" Nicholas said.  
"Hey asshole why don't you say that to my face" Riley threatened.

Nicholas jumped out of his seat and walked up to Riley in a fighting stance, all 4 feet of him. He started to punch Riley in a similar fashion to his Boulevard of Broken Dreams cover video.

[Riley in the confession toilet]  
"Nick's just a little cranky because his Pokemon got killed. Normally he'd love me"  
[the end]

J was trying on earrings at a local mart as Mike waited outside. StarForce and Shinxy slowly walked by. Shinxy didn't want to talk so StarForce was carrying him on his back.

"Oh hey fellas, what are you up to?" StarForce greeted.  
"Just bein Miley" Mike answered.

Shinxy sighed, falling off of StarForce and landing on le ground.

"I think Shinxy's a little jealous that Marrowsky got shipped with Element" StarForce explained.  
"Wait? Marrowsky is with Elemend?" J asked, his smile fading.  
"Yeah" StarForce said.  
"That sneaky little Jew" Mike said.  
"Well I mean Marrowsky was bound to be partnered up with someone" StarForce said.  
"I can't believe this. Element of all people?" J sighed.

J started sniffling.

"Don't tell anyone, but...I kinda have a crush on Marrowsky" J whispered.

Mike didn't respond and StarForce gasped.

"They're probably making out right as we speak" J sighed.

Element and Marrowsky were walking down some streets.

"Where are we going exactly?" Marrowsky asked.  
"No idea, I just like seeing people recognize me" Element told him.

"Hey, there's that Shinx Fucker!" a guy yelled out.

Element threw a smile at him.

"Hey, is that Shinx Fucker? Holy crud it's really him!" someone else yelled.  
"SHIXN FUCKER?" Someone screamed, running up to touch Element.  
"You're really drawing some attention" Marrowsky noted.  
"Yeah, I never thought I'd see le day I'm famous" Element smiled.

[Song #16 - Becoming Popular]

Element: I'll be le eyes of the subreddit, le guy on the stay  
I'm le type of furry every furry, every furry should know

Element and Marrowsky walk through a crowd of people.

Element: I'll be le one to watch, le mod cracking down

Element signs an autograph and pets someone's head

Element: I'm le type of furry every furry, every furry should know  
Becoming as popular as popular can be

Element judges an art show of badly drawn Pokémon

Element: Making my mark, making my mark in le community

Element rejects a badly drawn Pokémon submission and le user runs away crying

Element: I'm le light of le party, le freak of le show, yeah  
I'm le type of furry every furry, every furry should know  
See how they hang on every word that I speak

Someone requests to submit a post and Element judges it.

Element: My approving glance is what they all seek  
I'm le creme de la creme, not just another TailsLover

Element rejects le post because someone already asked le question and everyone applies.

Element: I'm le type of furry every furry should know  
At home, at le PC, being a fancy mod

Element plays Call of Duty

Element: Becoming le God, le God of all of CoD  
I'm le creme de la creme, not just another TailsLover, yeah  
I'm le type of furry every furry, every furry should know

Element cuts a ribbon for a store opening that's completely unrelated to this

Element: Because I'm le type of furry

Element waves to everyone

Element: Yes, I'm le type of furry

Shinxy watches from le distance, sighing.

Element: Yes, I'm le type of furry every furry should know  
[le end]  
"So, Shinxy. Why does your eye have a pentagram?" StarForce asked.  
"Idk X3" Shinxy replied.  
"Wow pentagrams are so cool. You're one bad kitty Shinxy" J complimented.  
"Tanks H" Shinxy thanked.  
"The name's J but we'll work on that later" J reassured.  
[J in the confession toilet]  
"Wow le people on this show are really terrible at james I mean names"  
[the end]  
"A pentagram huh..." Mike said, looking across le street and seeing Nicholas beating up Riley.  
Mike took his backpack off and unzipped it, revealing Grovyle's severed head inside of it.  
"Look I kept Grovyle's dead body in my bag!" Mike said.  
"Sex?" Shinxy asked.  
"No, Shinxy. We can't have sex with it." StarForce said, slapping Shinxy's wrist and fracturing it.  
"I think I have an idea" Mike said.  
"Attention contestants. We will soon begin the next challenge. Gather at le Eiffel Tower where we will commence our dating quiz show" Admin announced as he rode down le street in a wagon, being pulled by Imboo.  
"We should go to that" StarForce said, starting to walk away then noticed Mike, J, and Shinxy walking another way.  
"Hey guys! The challenge is about to start! Where are you going!?" StarForce asked impatiently.  
"This shouldn't be long" Mike said.  
"Yeah haha this should be fun I love trespassing in random locations" J laughed.  
StarForce sighed and followed le three into the catacombs. StarForce felt nervous as they started to press into le chambers, an ambient tone swept over StarForce as they walked through le dark tunnels. Mike eventually stopped walking and took his backpack off. Mike started to carve a symbol on the ground as Shinxy and J watched.  
"I hope this is fast, this place gives me le Keeble's" StarForce said, sitting down a human skull and crushing it.  
Mike continued to carve le symbol on le ground. J bent his head into a web and tried befriending a spider but it jumped on his face and he screamed. Mike eventually stopped carving le symbol and stood up, they all gazed upon it and saw that he had made a pentagram.  
"Nice job Moke if looks pretty sweet. Now we should really get going" StarForce insisted.  
"Just a minute! Mike persisted, dumping his bag over le pentagram. Grovyle's lifeless body fell facedown in le center of le pentagram drawing. Mike flipped him over so he was on his back.  
"We need Shinxy's blood" Mike said.  
"nah" Shinxy said.  
"Come on Shinxy just give us a little. For whatever Mike is trying to do" J said.  
"Alright Shinxy doesn't want to we should go now guys" StarForce begged.  
"StatForce stop being a fruity tooty and help us" Mike said.  
"Alright, whatever gets this over with faster. Shinxy, wasn't your wiener having a blood problem?" StarForce asked.  
"Yeah" Shinxy said.  
Mike grabbed Shinxy and ripped his pants off. Mike then threw Shinxy on top of le Grovyle and started rubbing his dick over it.  
"oh" StarForce said.  
Le friction was rough on Shinxy's penis and caused some blood to spurt out of it. Le blood dripped on le Grovyle's head. Mike and Shinxy then backed away from le pentagram.  
"Alright well that was a thing ready to go?" StarForce asked.  
Le pentagram started to glow. Mike, Shinxy, J, and StarForce backed away from it as it slowly grew brighter. A flash of white lights emitted from it and le air started intensifying, dust rising in le air and orbiting around le room. Le four hyraxes their eyes with their hands as Grovyle slowly levitated upwards, blood dropping off his body and landing on the pentagram symbol. Shinxy's eye started to throb and grow dark red. Le Grovyle's body slowly rotated so that it was standing upwards. It's eyes opened, revealing a pure black color. Grovyle's body slowly grew larger and its color transitioned from green to red. Grovyle grew a six pack and his arms and feet turned into hooves. A set of horns peeked out of le back of his head. Grovyle grew larger and le air's movement started to slow down. Grovyle dropped to his feet, le pentagram stopped glowing, and le dust surrounding le area fell back to le ground.  
StarForce fainted.  
"Hey, that's not Grovyle anymore! That's Satan" J exclaimed.  
"Yes." Mike replied.  
"Haha, I knew you'd be fun to hang out with" J laughed.

Mike and Satan casually walked out of le catacombs followed by J, StarForce, and Shinxy.  
"Hey what were le couples again?" J asked.  
"Oh, well heck if I know, I barely know who's on my team" StarForce shrugged.  
"Do you know Shinxy?" StarForce asked.  
"Why yes I do know Shinxy. He's right there." J replied.  
StarForce stared at J.  
"Commas, StarForce. They matter." J said, turning his head and pulling it up.  
"Do you know, Shinxy?" StarForce asked Shinxy.  
[Satan in the confession toilet]  
"Oh please, Shinxy has the IQ of a stillborn rat. I wouldn't expect him to know what state he was born in"  
[the end]  
MEANWHILE AT LE EIFFEL TOWER  
Admin was frantically checking his watch over and over again as he waited for le remaining contestants to arrive.  
"Holy fucking shit how long are these guys going to be?" Admin screamed.  
"Can you tone le language down we don't want le locals to think we're some kind of low class degenerate reality show" Imboo requested.  
"Imboo that's what reality shows are" Admin said.  
"Ok whatever I'm gonna go jack off and then post about it online" Imboo said.  
The rest of le contestants, save for Element, Marrowsky, Mike, J, Shinxy, and StarForce were all seated and ready for le challenge, sitting in tables of two scattered around le foot of le Eiffel Tower.

"Hey guys, GenesisFrenzy here" Riley said  
"Hey guys, GenesisFrenzy here" Nicholas repeated.  
"Hey Nick, that's my line" Riley complained.  
"Hey Nick, that's my line" Nicholas repeated.  
Madorky and Reu sat at le table next to them.  
"Sure is taking awhile for le challenge to start" Reu said.  
"I told you Admin would run out of materiel without haikik arcs" Madorky sighed, impatiently waiting for le challenge to start.  
"Run out of material? I'll show you le best and most awesome greatest ever challenge you'll never forget" Admin taunted.  
"When? November?" Madorky asked.  
"ELEMENT MARROWSKY J STARFORCE MIKE SHINXY IF YOU DON'T GET HERE SOON I'LL KICK YOU OFF LE SHOW" Admin screamed into a megaphone.  
Element and Marrowsky walked into le area. Element stretched his arms and yawned.  
"Man, I had to moderate SO many posts today. This one guy asked a repetitive question. You better believe I took that down" Element chuckled.  
Mattowksy stood directly behind Element, rubbing his back.  
[Marrowsky in the confession toilet]  
"Elly's muscles are sore from all those autographs. If I had a nickel for every terrible drawing Element had to sign, I'd have about 4 nickels."  
"Thanks for that, Murr..." Element thanked, closing his eyes and letting out a moan.  
Marrowsky stopped rubbing and everyone went quiet and turned to Element.  
"That didn't happen." Element assured.  
"Yes yes Element now take a seat as we wait for StarForce Shinxy J and Mike" Admin insisted.  
Marrowsky and Element followed Admin's orders and sat at an empty table.  
"Or we could just get rid of them. Saves ya four episodes really. Makes up for le months we've been waiting for this to continue" Rydli suggested.  
"No, because you lose out on content" Admin argued.  
"Not really, don't think anyone would complain if we just moved on without them, Y'know" Rydli shrugged.  
"Rydli. StarForce, Mike, J, and Shinxy are all highly respected members of le haiku community. We can't just ditch them" Admin said.  
"Oh well that kinda contradicts what you said into le megaphone like 15 seconds ago" Rydli replied.  
Finally, StatForce, Mikechal, J, and Shoxny arrived in a pack, with satanic Grovyle behind them all.  
"What is this?" Admin asked.  
"Mike got a new bf" StarForce explained.  
"You mean boyfriend" Admin corrected.  
"It's the same thing, I just said that to abbreviate it's Y'know, save us some time" StarForce explained.  
"No, it doesn't save time. It causes confusion. You could have meant best friend, or bitch fit, or broccoli fudge" Admin taunted.  
"Broccoli fudge? Never heard of that one, pretty sure in context it was pretty obvious that I meant-"  
"Are you trying to call me an idiot, StarForce?" Admin asked with anger rising in his voice.  
"Oh, uh, uh n-no, of course not. I was just trying to back up my abbreviation of le word boyfriend" StarForce explained, sweat pouring down his forehead.  
"StarForce you are wasting everybody's time. Nobody wants to see you fumble around with abbreviation nobody understands they want to see a quality show. You've wasted enough time as it is so why don't you just take a seat already" Admin ordered.  
"It wasn't really my idea, though, in fact I was trying to get everyone back quicker" StarForce defended.  
"StarForce shut up" Admin finished.  
"Yeah ok" StarForce sighed with dismal.  
StarForce and Shinxy took a seat next at le table next to Nicholas and Riley.  
"Hey look it's that Shinx dude you were talking about earl-"  
"SHUT UP RILEY I hate that piece of garbage why did he have to sit next to us he's retarded should I say hi to him?" Nicholas asked Riley.  
"Oh wow it seems a lot of missed exposition happened between the time we arrived here and right now, huh?" Riley asked.  
"I'm not even going to say anything to him I won't even acknowledge him he's worthless" Nicholas slammed his head on le table.  
Mike and Satan sat at another nearby table.  
"Hey wait if Mike's with Satan who do I get as my hunny bunny? Is it Marrowsky?" J asked.  
"Well Lemon was on le fap patrol but since we have an even amount of team members now I guess you could be with him" Admin shrugged.  
"Hey wait" Cloud cried out.  
"That means I'm le only one without a date" Cloud complained.  
"Yeah well, what can I say. Really what can I say I have no joke for this. Just sit down" Admin said.  
Clearing his throat, Admin took some index cards out of his shirt pocket and briefly scanned them. Imboo tossed him a microphone as he played some jazz music form his radio.  
"And now" Admin began, imitating a game show host's charismatic tone.  
"It's time for le Newlyshipped Game!" Admin shouted.  
A huge neon sign titled "Newlyshipped Game" hung over le Eiffel Tower's lowest arch.  
"Is he allowed to hang that there?" Jp asked.  
"Probably not" Rydli said.  
Bright colored lights danced across le ground.  
"Introducing our lovely new couples! Kicking this off, we have Shinxy and StarForce for the Troll Slaiyers. After friending Element on Steam because he has a Shinx as an icon. Shinxy became acquainted with le rest of the haikuers. Homeschooled as well, Shinxy isn't always seen as le brightest, and his furry background is sometimes le center of mockery, but hey he's a cute little kitten mew ^-^. StarForce is known for his kinky roleplaying habits"  
"I, uh, don't really do that anymore. Thought everyone forgot about that. Wouldn't say it's one of my defining traits, haha" StarForce said nervously.  
"Known best for his kinky roleplays, StarForce is often described as a true bro. He likes playing games and being in kinky roleplays-"  
"Again don't do that anymore, aha"  
"But is usually pretty quiet in haiku groups" Admin introduced.  
"Next we have Michael and Satan, otherwise known by Mike and that creepy Grovyle with bloodshot eyes. Team Jacob members. Or at least one of them. Why exactly did we allow this? Oh whatever. Mike likes Nintendo games, not working at krogre, and shitposts. His partner Satan likes death, murder, fire, bloodshed, screaming, eternal torture, the color red, and long walks on le beach" Admin introduced.  
Mike and Satan waved from their seats.  
"Ananananamasnansnsnssnsnnnsns" Mike said.  
"That is so Mike" J laughed.  
"Next up we have Rydli and Jp from le Troll Slaiyers. Otherwise known as Rydli and Jp Rydli started in season 2 while this is Jp's freshman run. Rydli likes math, being attractive, tennis, doing leg stretches, and being related to Genghis Khan. He also has a great resume of things we can't fit into this description. Jp likes anime, drawing, and memes." Admin introduced.  
Rydli smiled and waves to all of le French girls fainting at le sight of him from le audience.  
"Hey wait why was your description much longer than mine? Mine just had things that half of le people here can be categorized into" Jp complained.  
"It's just hard to follow up from someone like Le Ryds." Rydli chuckled.  
Jp folded her arms.  
"Next for Team Jacob we got veterans Berserker and Blooberri, here on their third season. Friends like to call them Berk and Bloo. Both made it far in previous seasons and are hoping to regain that spark. Berserker likes bagels, thylacines, competitive Pokemon, Metroid, and Shrek memes. Blooberri likes cartoons, drawing, being nice to others, not swearing, and hanging with her best bud Sunnia." Admin introduced.  
"Yeah, too bad she got voted off" Bloo said.  
"I, uh, meme" Berserker replied.  
"From le Troll Slaiyers we got Kirby and Cameron, best known by their usernames Gluvr, or Gizmo-lover, and Grenade. Three seasons running, not le best track record, but hey only more reason to redeem themselves for season 3. Gluvr likes drawing, going to cons, watching anime, being nice to everybody, and having a social life. Grenade likes being Canadian, Goanimate, being middle ground and down to earth, and being friends with people le rest of le haikuers hate" Admin introduced.  
"Yay!" Gluvr said.  
"I also got voted off for not singing a dirty song once. Wow this show had a limit before" Grenade said.  
"Carly and Samuel Logan, known best by Robot and Sam, are here representing Team Jacob. Robot's best known for her love of robots, being good at Smash and animating, and disliking qualities of herself that are actually really good. Always coming on le show in her trademark robot suit, she uses it for technological efficiency and to beep. Sam, the Man, loves working out, having sex, partying, being a bro, being flanderized as soon as le show begins, and screaming. A tough competitor, Sam made it all le way to le final five in Haiku Drama Island only to be eliminated by total bullshit. Classic." Admin introduced.  
"Aw yeah BITCH I'M MAKING A COMEBACK" Sam shouted, ripping his shirt off.  
"Beep" Robot said, handing Sam a replacement shirt for him to put on.  
"Next up we for Pseudonym and Carz of le Troll Slaiyers. An interesting matchup, to say the least. Most prefer to call him Pseudo, none prefer to call him Alex. One of le oldest haikuers, Pseduo spends time being a twin and being a stupid shit with haiskype"  
"Stupid shit?" Pseudonym questioned.  
"Not le most standout user but he isn't Robert-tier either. Between college and work, Pseudonym is your average 20-something guy. Carz, a classic haikuer. Never makes it far because he has no personality and nobody cares to see him stay. All he does is shitpost about le newest meme trend. Also is homeschooled and pretends to be retarded. Or maybe he actually is. Who knows! People have shifted from hating him to liking him to tolerating him, and all along le way nothing anyone has said has brought seriousness out of him. Besides posting his address." Admin introduced.  
"Grand Dad! HIGH QUALITY RIPS" Carz screamed.  
"Come on Carz, I think between le time this episode started and now that meme will have-oh wait no it's still going? Oh alright." Pseudonym said.  
"Moving on for Team Jacob, we got Alice and Stephen"  
"Hi I'm a guy again" Madorky said.  
"Jake and Stephen. Or is it Steven. Oh well no one calls him that. Also known by Madorky or Squishward, and Reuniclus of just plain Reu if you don't know how to spell it. Fan of video games and exquisite taste in le dankest of memes, Jake likes having weird friends and Quote from Homestuck."  
"You mean Undertale" Reu rolled his eyes.  
"Then there's Reu, holder of 30-something fans, professional memer and Jojo fan, he spends his time modding his 3ds, doing good in school, and not being remembered at haiku parties. Madorky and Reu both started in season 2 which nobody talks about but now they're here to shine" Admin introduced.  
"Whoa dude can you show me how to upgrade from exquisite taste of le dankest of memes to professional memer?" Jake asked.  
"Back to Troll Slaiyers is le couple Moogle could be arrested for. Drew and Rosanna, known by Mr. Moogle and Pantz, are both high profile haikuers relevant since le beginning. 3rd place in HDI is Moogle, fan of moogles and ponies, Le Mog likes playing drums, majoring in marine biology, being on le right track in life, and keeping in touch with his haiku buds all along le way. High schooler Pantz made it to le finale in HDI, runner up in North America and winner in Canada, Pantz likes contributing at school with her skills in art, skateboarding, chilling out, and being shipped with Cloud." Admin introduced.  
Moogle's head laid on le table as drool poured out of his mouth. Pantz tugged on his turtleneck and he woke up startled.  
"Uh what's going on is le show finally doing something?" Moogle asked, rubbing his eyes.  
"Team Jacob members Riley and Nicholas are next"  
"I'm sorry why did Riley's name go first? Am I not one of le most Iconic and Memorable users of All Time" Nicholas asked.  
"Riley's an Internet STAR. Host of le hit channel GenesisFrenzy, Riley has a passion for video games, a love for anime girls, a thirst for fame, and of course who could forget his favorite video game Sonic le Hedgehog. Technically he does have a haiku account, but started here without one, making him le first non-haikuer-but-eventually-a-haikuer on le show! Then there's Nicholas. He likes republicans, vaporwave, and vore" Admin introduced.  
"What le heck you missed my Epic traits. I also made it to 4th place in HDI before being crucified. I have Epic skills with piano and guitar. And I'm GREAT with debates" Nicholas said.  
"Hey guys GenesisFrenzy here" Riley introduced.  
"Also Nicholas is le size of an Oompa Loompa" Admin finished.  
"Julie and Ziggy, also known as Joe and Ziggy, are our next Troll Slaiyers. Joe is a fan of lots of things and likes drawing. She got grounded and is limited to only use Facebook, but don't worry we kidnapped her so she could still be on the show! Ziggy likes anime waifus, saying funny derivations of words like goodnight and puppy, and disappearing. Joe was part of an alliance in season one that proved successful in le end when her ally won, but a breakup sort of soured the mood. Ziggy was in season one also! He, uh. He was there. Avocado." Admin introduced.  
"Gay" Joe said.  
"Loafer" Ziggy said.  
"Brady and Isaac, also sometimes called GingeraleDragon and Creveli, are our next homosexual couple for Team Jacob. Both season two and onwards members. Fan of fucking Pokemon and making enemies, Gingerale used to be in le dreaded roleplaying chat. Somehow he made it out and made a name for himself with le haikuers, growing to be one of le most recognized members. He loves his PC, whole wheat, and Charizard hat, as well as doing voice impressions and formerly making gifs. Ah those gifs...Isaac, or Naomi, one of le younger haikuers, likes being supportive of others and being interrupted by those louder than him."  
"Uh, no I do-"  
"Isaac's also a fan of lots of TV shows, comics, and video games including Rick and Morty, The Walking Dead, Gravity Falls, Doctor Who, and-"  
"Yeah, yeah, yeah. Also, I have sick writing skills. I'm working on this new adult novella about a Garchomp who-"  
"Hey Gingerale I don't think it's very nice to interrupt le host during his opening statements" Isaac said.  
"You interrupted me though. Do you have any idea how annoying that is?" Gingerale asked.  
"No I-"  
"Jonathan and whatever Marrowsky's name is or Element and Mattowsky, Troll Slaiyer lovers. What can I say about Element, he's like le wolverine of haiku"  
"That's a good thing right" Element asked.  
"From his cover of Dynamite to earning the greatest title le world has to offer: being a Reddit mod, Element has been a haiku staple since time has begun. From being le butt of every joke to leading an army of Discord members, Element has always stayed relevant with his constant quirky situations such as being a guy who jacks off to furry porn but doesn't actually like furries, being teased for liking vore when he isn't and then it turns out he actually is into it, and being a homeschooled PC master race anti-sjw teenager who went from wanting to leave le island as soon as possible to eagerly awaiting each new destination, Element always has a way to stay fresh." Admin introduced.  
"Wow, that was actually pretty nice." Element smiled.  
"And Marrowsky. He's like le Cyclops I guess. He's le furry with sunglasses who is cool" Admin said.  
"That's it?" Marrowsky asked, stunned.  
"Sorry dude guess it's tough to follow up a Reddit mod" Element shrugged, tipping his fedora.  
All of le Reddit fans in le audience screamed with excitement, holding up signs requesting Element's dick.  
"Reddit's really popular on France I guess. I got Reddit gold once" Marrowsky said.  
The audience went silent and le only person applauding was J from le other side of le area.  
"A sudden new ship has arrived, it's our boys Phillpe and Jonah from Team Jacob. Known better by their usernames Lemon and J. Lemon is a third generation haikuer who quickly grew accustomed with some of le more seasoned members. Known for his humble book smarts and kindhearted demeanor, Lemon is friendly and likes getting things done. His partner J made it all le way to le final 10 in season one. What can we say about J, wanted at Walmarts worldwide, a fascination for cats and jewelry, and a flamboyant attitude that his fellow haikuers either love or hate, J tries his best to be happy go lucky around everyone and make things interesting. Also he's part wizard." Admin introduced.  
"Oh wow thanks for that introduction, really, uh, nailed my personality I guess." Lemon said.  
"Lemon we are going to do SO great together. I'll even wear a dress to make it more believable" J eagerly suggested.  
"Oh no J that's not really necessary" Lemon insisted, waving his hands.  
J pulled a skirt out from under le table.  
"Oh wow you brought one with you. That's really, uh, thoughtful of you. Couldn't wait for an opportunity like this to pop up huh" Lemon asked as J put le dress on.  
"Wrapping things up we got our final couple from Troll Slaiyers, who else but...oh wait it's just Cloud. No lover. He's by himself" Admin remembered.  
"Yeah I'm more of a lone wolf type of guy. Don't need no woman tying me down." Cloud yawned, picking McDonald's out of his teeth with a toothpick.  
"Jamie's a weenie who goes by the name Cloud. Cloud loves memes and 12 years olds from the 90s as well as Rosalina, Palutena, and a large array of anime characters to masturbate to. He likes hanging with le bros and Smashing foes, one thing you never want to mention around this guy though is Shrek 4" Admin introduced.  
"WHAT about Shrek 4!?" Cloud asked.  
"Nothing I was just saying how we shouldn't mention it" Admin explained.  
"Good." Cloud said, folding his arms.  
"While not in a relationship, Cloud's masturbation skills have given him a lot of familiarity with fictional females, so that's, uh, useful I guess. Maybe? Alright well that's all le contestants.  
"So here's le deal. I'm going to ask all of you a series of questions about your lover. If you get a question right your team scores a point. Now let's see which ship is le OTP." Admin excitedly yelled.  
[J in the confession toilet]  
"OTP? Oh no, I can't do this. If me and Lemon are le OTP, that means me and Marrowsky AREN'T le OTP. But I can't mess up a challenge for my team...I'll just have to hope Lemon doesn't know a lot about me"  
[the end]  
"Alright Lemon. When asked "Which Canadian haikuer do you admire most", J answered blank.  
"Uh, well, just gonna take a shot in le dark here. Is it Marrowksy?" Lemon asked, holding a sign up with Mattowsku written on it.  
J lifted up is sign with Marrowsky written on it.  
"Omg HOW did you know that? Geez Lemon you and I must be really good friends" J said.  
"You mean a really good couple! Give our audience a kiss to congratulate Team Jacob's first point." Admin exclaimed.  
"Uhzzzzzzzzzz...enfbfbfbb" Lemon kissed J's hand.  
"Fantastic. Now for our next couple."  
Fancy game show music played as Admin strolled from one table to le next.  
"Cloud and...Cloud. Alright Cloud. When asked "What do you want to see your man in, Palutena answered what?" Admin asked, reading off a card.  
"Palutena? How did Palutena respond to this question? How am I supposed to know this?" Cloud asked.  
"She's your waifu, Cloud. A man must know his waifus" Admin said.  
"Ok, uh, nothing. She said nothing. She likes em nude" Cloud answered confidently.  
"oooo, noooope. Her answer was sandals. She likes a man in sandals. 0 points for Troll Slaiyers" Admin recapped.  
"Rigged" Cloud complained.  
"Next up is Gingerale and Isaac. We asked Isaac what his favorite brand of bread is. Gingerale, what is Isaac's favorite brand of bread?" Admin asked.  
"What? Who asks something like this? How am I supposed to know? Uhhhh whole wheat" Gingerale said.  
Isaac held up his sign, revealing pita bread.  
"Oh COME ON" Gingerale slammed his fists on le table.  
"I told you. I was trying to prepare us for questions like these" Isaac sighed.  
Admin moved on to Element and Marrowsky.  
"Alright Element. When asked "Would you rather :3c, :3c, or ;(=D your lover", Marrowsky responded blank.  
"Um, what?" Element asked.  
"I'm sorry, um what was not le answer." Admin frowned.  
"No I mean, I didn't really understand le question. You could have given me visuals of something but you just said le emoticons verbally and it threw me off" Element explained.  
"Excused, excuses. Marrowsky's answer was :3c" Admin sighed.  
[Marrowsky in the confession toilet]  
"Hope all of this fame isn't going to Element's head. He seems to be forgetting all about me..."  
[the end]  
"Nicholas, Riley!" Admin greeted.  
"Hey guys, GenesisFrenzy here" Riley greeted.  
[Nicholas in the confession toilet]  
"I know everything about Riley. One YouTube video showed me everything I need to know about him. Unfortunately"  
[the end]  
"Alright Nicholas. Tell us. When asked, "Who is le best hedgehog?", Riley answered blank." Admin said.  
"Hmmm, now who would le best hedgehog be? That is a very pressing question I'm glad you asked." Nicholas said.  
Shinxy was poking around StatForce's zippers. Nicholas noticed and shook his head, trying to regain focus.  
"Le best, le best...SWASTIKA!" Nicholas screamed, banging his head off le table.  
"It wasn't, quite swastika. But close. The answer was Classic Sonic" Admin revealed, and Riley held up the sign with Classic Sonic written on it with a drawing of Sonic and Riley wagging their fingers below le words.  
"Man you guys are really bad at this. Leading with one point is Team Jacob everybody. Behind with zero point is Troll Slaiyers." Admin recapped.  
Admin walked over to Joe and Ziggy.  
"Alright Joe my friend. Tell me. When asked "Are you more of a pupper or a doggo", Ziggy answered blank.  
"Uhhhhhh, pupper?" Joe asked.  
Ziggy flipped his card or fence whatever le word I used before was. Paper maybe. It said pupper.  
"Wow congrats. A team for Troll Slaiyers to tie things up" Admin said.  
Confetti rained on Ziggy and Joe. Joe started eating le confetti as Ziggy admired her with a Belushi.  
[Ziggy in the confession toilet]  
"Wow, I feel like Joe really gets me. If you think about it, her leaving, me leaving, we have a lot in common. Maybe our mutual habit of leaving everyone for several months allowed her to see deep inside that I'm a pupper"  
[the end]  
"Jake and Reu. You're up next. I wonder if it'll be a Jojo joke. Haha who would see that coming. Nobody. Anyways, Madorky, Squishward, Ja-KEH, when asked "Who do you aspire to be", Reu answered blank.  
"Is it Dio" Jake suggested.  
"It was Dio" Reu nodded.  
Jake and Reu went in for a smooch but awkwardly stopped before making contact and switched to a hug but awkwardly stopped again and switched to a high five but Reu missed so they just shook hands.  
"Team Jacob 2 Troll Slaiyers 1. Moogle and Pantz are up next. Alright Moogle, we asked Pantz what she would like to eat for a dinner with boo. It's your job to guess le food she selected" Admin said.  
"Easy. Sushi. Girls love cultural food to broaden their taste." Moogle answered confidently.  
"Nope it was french fries" Pantz revealed.  
"Really? French fries? You don't think that's more of a side than an actual meal?" Moogle asked.  
"I'm just in le mood for fries man" Pantz shrugged.  
"You wouldn't have happened to remember this very episode where I was talking about sushi. A food. So it was on my mind. And I mentioned taking girls on sushi dates. So that question would have been easy for us to get if you picked le most relevant food on our minds" Moogle suggested.  
"I don't like sushi dude. I'm just really on le mood for fries. Not gonna lie to get a stupid point." Pantz shrugged.  
Moogle signed as Admin moved on to le next couple.  
"Sam and Robot. Our first question was for good 'ol Sam." Admin said.  
"The answer's Sam" Sam answered.  
"No Sam you aren't supposed to-"  
"Sam. It's Sam. IS IT SAM?" Sam asked.  
"I'm just going to move into le next couple" Admin said.  
Carz screamed and was touching Pseudo's face.  
"Why even bother" Psuedo warned.  
[Pseudonym in the confession toilet]  
"Luckily I have a foolproof plan to make sure Carz answers correctly"  
[the end]  
"Alright Carz. We asked Pseduo what his favorite hobby to do with his spouse is. Your guess?" Admin asked.  
"GRAND DAD" Carz screamed.  
"Oh, Carz." Admin chuckled.  
"That's such a ridiculous-oh what do you know it was grand dad" Admin noticed, admiring Pseudo's grand dad titled card.  
"Hey wait isn't it cheating to not answer honestly and just use words you know they'll say?" Jp asked.  
"no le entire point is to know what each other is going to say" Pseudo answered.  
"Team Jacob 2, Troll Slaiyers 2. Next up we got Berk 'n Bloo. Berserker, why don't you tell us a little about yourself" Admin insisted.  
"No." Berserker replied.  
"Alright then, answer me this question. When asked "Would you rather spend a day with Spider-Man, Iron Man, or Wolverine", Bloo answered blank.  
"Ok why does he get a multiple choice question. I would have nailed mine if I got multiple choice" Moogle complained.  
"Iran Man is sucks so Spider-Man" Berserker guessed.  
"Correct. A point for Team Jacob!" Admin cheered.  
Berserker and Blooberri looked at each other awkwardly. Berserker moved in for a fist bump but Booo came in too hard and her fist hurt Befk's.  
"The score is 3-2, let's see if Grenade and Gluvr can tie it up. Alright Grenade, when asked "Do you want a man to be cute and cuddly or daring and dirty", Gluvr asked what.  
"Seriously. A 50/50 question? And mine had le entire food spectrum as choices? How much thought went into this exactly?" Moogle asked.  
"They're on our team, dude" Pantz reminded.  
"Uhhhhhh daring and dirty?" Grenade guessed.  
"Rawr, you chose correctly. Team Jacob 3, Troll Slaiyers 3." Admin said.  
"Yay" Gluvr cheered, hugging Grenade. Grenade blushed.  
"Mike and Satan. Satan, we asked Mike "if somebody stole your sandwich, you would blank" Admin asked.  
"Finna kill someone" Satan answered.  
"Correctamundo! Team Jacob takes le lead again with 4 points" Admin cheered.  
"Aw, you know me so well honey" Mike noted, snuggling with his big Satan bear.  
Satan glanced over at Shinxy's table as Shinxy tried remembering whether le spoon he was holding was a fork or a spoon.  
"Rydli. Jp. It's all on you now." Admin said.  
Rydli waves to le crowds as le woman swooned over him, Jp rolling her eyes.  
"Rydli we asked what Jp's favorite novel is. Let's see what you got" Admin asked.  
"Fahrenheit 451" Rydli answered confidently.  
"Ehhhhhh. Was that a wrong buzzing sound? Ennnfngng. No? I feel like bzzzzt is more of a bee. Ok how shine ayyyyynnnnnnh." Admin said.  
"Just stop" Jp said as she flipped over her card, revealing Berenstain Bears' Trouble at School.  
"Wow that's an oddly specific Berenstein Bears title." Rydli said.  
"You mean Berenstain Bears" Jo corrected.  
"What, it's spelled Berenstein" Rydli said.  
"No it was Berenstain" Jp said.  
"I thought it was Berenstein too" Bloo admitted.  
"It isn't?" Jake asked.  
Chatter broke out throughout le haikuers discussing if it was Berenstein or Betenstain.  
"WE'RE LIVING IN A PARALLEL UNIVERSE" Joe screamed.  
"Ssh, sssh, settle down everyone. Now the score is 4-3 but we have one final Troll Slaiyers couple. If they get this question right they'll tie le game up. So Shinxy and StarForce, are you ready?" Admin asked.  
"Sure are. We got this Shinxy, huh?" StarForce asked him.  
"Murr" Shinxy nodded.  
"Alright StarForce. We asked Shinxy, "If you could FUCK-"  
"oh, haha"  
"Le living SHIT-"  
"Quite a different tone from le other questions I have to say, haha"  
"Out of any Pokemon, who would it be?" Admin asked.  
"Oh, would it be Shinx?" StarForce guessed.  
Shinxy lifted up his sign with a crude picture of two Shinx's going at it.  
"So, uh, is that a point?" StarForce asked.  
"Yeah whatever. The score is now 4-4. We now go back and ask le opposite person a question. Ok Shinxy, we asked StarForce-"  
"Oh, wow. Sure got to it fast. Don't even remember answering any question. Pretty sudden if you ask me" StarForce said.  
"Shut up StarForce. We asked StarForce "When it comes to Mega Man, this series really takes let cake". Is the answer classic, X, legends, .exe, or StarForce?" Admin asked.  
"Is if classic?" Shinxy guessed.  
"Oooo, NOOO, it was StarForce" Admin said.  
"Oh. Well it should have been classic" Shinxy said.  
"Yeah whatever. Rydli and Jp we return to you. We asked Rydli "For Christmas, I could really use a nice pair of blank socks" What did Rydli say?" Admin asked.  
"I, uh, don't think we're ready for that level of relationship questions" Jp said.  
"I don't care. Tell me what he said" Admin demanded.  
"I don't know ankle socks?" Jp guessed.  
"Incredible." Admin said, opening a bottle of champagne.  
"Wow, Jp. I never knew you knew me like that..." Rydli said.  
"Yeah whatever sounds like a terrible Christmas present either way" Jp said.  
[Rydli in the confession toilet]  
"Wow, all this time Jp has known all these things about me like what kind of socks I'd prefer to get for Christmas and I didn't even bother to remember her favorite Berenstein Bear book"  
[the end]  
"Team Jacob 4, Troll Slaiyers 5. We return to Mike and Satan. Satan, we asked Mike about his favorite phrase. Can you tell us what that phrase is?" Admin asked.  
"Brogres before hogres" Satan answered immediately.  
Mike held up his sign, indeed saying brogres before hogres.  
"Aw, deer" Mike blushed, hugging Satan.  
"Wow, bringing it back 5 to 5. Next up is Grenade and Kirby. Kirby, we asked Grenade, "If I could be any person in le world, I would be blank". What did Grenade say?" Admin asked Gluvr.  
"Wait who would you be?" Kirby asked.  
"No who would Grenade be" Admin clarified.  
"But you said who would I" Kirby said.  
"Yes from le perspective of Grenade. Is this dialogue really necessary? Just answer" Admin commanded.  
"Uh, is it Quentin Tarantino?" Gluvr asked.  
Grenade revealed his sign, reading Quentin Tarantino.  
"Wow. That was oddly straightforward. Troll Slaiyers lead 6 to 5.  
"Berserker, Blooberri. How's it going?" Admin asked.  
"Fine." Berserker answered.  
"Right, right. Hey Bloo. Can you tell me what Berserker's name is?" Admin asked.  
"Bits a fits a wha-WHAT?" Mr. Moogle screamed.  
"Is it John?" Bloo guessed.  
"Yes it is." Berserker revealed.  
"It was in le introduction!" Mr. Moogle complained.  
"Chill dude we'll get our time to shine" Pantz reassured.  
"Bumping it up to 6-6, let's move on to Carz and Pseudo. Carz. We asked Pseudonym, "If I could-"  
"Shit" Carz screamed.  
"Just move on and save yourself time" Pseudo urged.  
"Yeah alright. Sam and Robot. Robot, we asked Sam, "Would you prefer a dong, cactus, or bunny rabbit shoved up your anus."  
"Uh. Alright. I'm gonna guess cactus" Robot said.  
"Whoa how'd you know?" Sam asked, revealing le correct answer on his sign.  
"You wouldn't want to hurt a rabbit and you aren't gay. Plus only a real tough man can handle a cactus up a butt. At least according to you" Robot explained.  
"Wow, you really know me well bro" Sam smiled.  
"Team Jacob takes it back 7-6. Next is Pantz and Moogle." Admin continued.  
Moogle took deep breaths in preparation.  
"Ok Pantz. We asked Moogle, "If you could be any vegetable, what would you be?"  
"Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh a carrot?" Pantz guessed.  
"A carrot? A CARROT? I've made it clear on numerous occasions that if I was to ever become a vegetable I would want to be an ASPARAGUS" Moogle slammed his head off le table.  
"ooo, tough luck. Well onto le next couple. Jake and Reu. Ok Reu, we asked Jake, "Who's your favorite pony?" Reu?" Admin asked.  
"Favorite...pony? As in My Little Pony?" Reu asked.  
"Yes that would be correct" Admin said.  
"Oh sweet" Reu pumped his fist.  
"No not that you were correct, but that it's from My Little Pony. Now give us your answer" Admin demanded.  
"Uh, Starscream?" Reu guessed.  
"No." Admin said.  
"It was Appljeack" Jake revealed.  
"Dang it" Reu sighed.  
"Ziggy, Joe. You're up next. I asked Joe who le coolest haikuer is. Ziggy, can you tell us?" Admin asked.  
"Easy. Pantz. Joe's a huge fan of her." Ziggy said.  
Joe revealed her sign, reading "Ziggy".  
"Oh..." Ziggy said.  
"Aww" le audience cooned.  
"You really think I'm cool?" Ziggy asked.  
"I think you're iced out cool" Joe nodded.  
";0;" Ziggy responded.  
"Heartwarming but wrong. Nicholas and Riley are up next." Admin walked away.  
"Hey guys, GenesisFrenzy here" Riley greeted.  
"Hey guys, GenesisFrenzy here" Nicholas imitated.  
"Ok Riley. We asked Nicholas who his favorite Smash character is" Admin explained.  
"Yes, we couldn't answer something about my favorite music or political views. It had to be about Smash. I love talking about Smash Brothers. Ok Riley f*ck le answer up" Nicholas insisted.  
"Who is Pikachu?" Riley guessed.  
Nicholas flipped his sign, reading Pikachu.  
"How did you know that" Nicholas asked without a question mark.  
"I heard you talking about maining Pikachu during that brief time I was in le Skype group before being kicked out. And Raichu is my favorite Pokemon so I guess le info stuck" Riley explained.  
"Congrats. Team Jacob widens their lead 8-6. Things look grim for Troll Slaiyers." Admin recapped.  
"Wow I didn't know we loosely shared a mutual liking of a Pokemon from le same evolution family" Nicholas said.  
"Does that make us Pichu Brothers!?" Riley asked eagerly, hugging Nicholas.  
"No." Nicholas responded.  
"Element and Marrowsky. Your turn boys. Marrowsky, we asked Element, "Which one of you said I love you first". Marrowksy, tell us who said it first." Admin ordered.  
"Uh, well, neither of us." Marrowsky said.  
Element put his sign up, reading "none".  
The audience gasped.  
"A loveless marriage? HOW COULD YOU SHINX_FUCKED?" someone screamed.  
"It's just a game" Marrowksy said.  
"JUST A GAME. IS LOVE SOME KIND OF SICK JOKE TO YOU PEOPLE" someone cried, running off.  
"Bonjour, French accent I have, that couple is so sad as to not have love in their relationship aye" a French guy agreed.  
"They don't...think this is an actual Newlyshipped Game, do they?" Element asked Admin.  
"What is that supposed to mean? Oh I get it, Mr. Shinx_Fucker only wanted le publicity" someone said.  
"Y'know these guys don't really seem French. That last guy didn't even have an accent at all" Element said.  
"Ugh, insulting" le guy replied, leaving le area.  
"Ok. So anyways, that makes 8-7. Gingerale and Isucc, you're up. Isaac we asked Gingerale if he could change anything about himself, what would it be. Isaac, what do you think he answered?" Admin asked.  
"Hm. Well Gingerale bro, I think you're really great and I have no problems with ya, but I know how insecure you are about yourself. So I'll say you don't like your voice" Isaac guessed.  
Gingerale revealed what he wrote, "Nothing.", narrowing his eyes at Isaac.  
"Cloud, my man. Hey bro can you tell me what Rosalina's favorite color is?" Admin asked.  
"Ah yes well my fap index recalls a porn where Rosalina had a thirst for Yellow Devil dick, so I'm gonna go with yellow." Cloud answered.  
"That's...correct, actually. Making things 8-8. If J can answer le next question correctly, Team Jacob will win. If he gets it wrong, it'll be a tie. Now J. For le win, can you tell us, what is Lemon's name of origin?" Admin asked.  
The music got intense. All of le contestants watched closely as le camera focused in on J and Lemon. J looked down thinking of what to answer. Lemon held his card and evaluated his answer. Swear poured down his neck as he awaited J's response.  
"I believe...Lemon's name...comes from..." J thought.  
Admin leaned in for J's answer.  
Imboo ate a pastrami sandwich.  
"French." J answered.  
"No it was inspired from le fruit called lemon" Lemon revealed.  
"Oh I thought you meant his actual name. Is it French?" J asked.  
"Who cares. The game's a dud. A tie. We need a tiebreaker now. Damn it." Admin shouted.  
"So what's le next challenge?" Imboo asked.  
"I don't know. I didn't plan this far." Admin admitted.  
"What do you mean you didn't plan this far?" We've been waiting months for this and you only had one challenge?" Gingerale asked.  
"Well yeah I wasn't expecting a tie to be honest" Admin admitted.  
"I'm sorry are we just going to casually allow Satan to be a contestant and not even acknowledge it?" Jp asked.  
"You guys are exaggerating you haven't been waiting months." Admin rolled his eyes.  
"This was supposed to be a Valentine's Day special" Moogle reminded.  
"Yeah and" Admin asked.  
"It's about to be August" Moogle reminded.  
"What le heck. What's going on? Why have we been here so long? Has le show been cancelled?" Gingerale asked.  
"No." Admin said.  
"Maybe le show's almost over so they're spacing le episode as far apart as possible to make it last longer" Bloo suggested.  
"Right. We're almost at le end of le run with almost 30 people still competing" Pseudonym replied sarcastically.  
"WHAT IF EVERY EPISODE FROM NOW ON IS GONNA BE A QUINTUPLE ELIMINATION!?" J panicked.  
"It could still be to drag out le appeal. Did you know The Looney Tunes Show waited an entire year before airing their final episode?" Bloo informed everyone.  
"They waited an entire year. To air le next episode they already had produced." Admin replied, raising an eyebrow.  
"Yes." Bloo said.  
"I don't know if I can handle an episode a year. I don't want to do this until I'm 40. Will my ironic humor and Shrek love last that long?" Cloud asked.  
"It's ok we can vote you off next so you can stop right away" Rydli suggested.  
The haikuers started babbling amongst themselves and Admin tried to calm them down.  
"Calm down everyone, geez, it's not that hard to make a challenge up. We'll do a, uh, dating simulator challenge, or whatever. Is that cool?" Admin asked.  
"How long is this going to go on? Why does this keep happening?" The crowd asked.  
"Wow ok too lazy to pick out individual names to say those lines, huh. Alright, well. Uh, le reason we've been here so long is because..." Admin tried to think.  
"Laziness?" Jake guessed.  
"Standardsvitis?" Joe suggested.  
"Standardsvitis?" Admin asked.  
"You know when someone's work gets liked so they try to make it better and better each time but it just makes things take forever to come out and have humor trying too hard to be funny" Joe said.  
"That's the dumbest thing I've heard." Admin said.  
"No u" Joe responded.  
"I got it. The reason we've been here so long is because...we're...stuck in a time loop oh my God guys ahhhhhh we're stuck ahhhhh" Admin screamed.  
All of le haikuers stood defiantly.  
"Let's just do le stupid dating sim" Admin ordered.  
"Stupid? STUPID!? You think dating sims are STUPID!? How dare you!" Joe shouted.  
"I'm just gonna...yeah, I have some mod duties to attend to" Element said, stepping away from everyone.  
"Element you can't walk away. We need to finish le challenge" Marrowsky said, tugging on him.  
"Admin has no idea what he's doing right now. I don't want to waste my time when I can be hanging with people who appreciate me. I'll be back later when he has this thing straightened out" Element said, taking Marrowsky's arm off of him.  
"So it IS true. You DON'T love me anymore" Marrowsky cried out.  
"What. Marrowsky that was just a random pairing." Element said.  
"We're drifting apart. You never want to spend time with me anymore. It's all about your job!"' Marrowsky said, running off covering his eyes.  
"What le hell. Oh well" Element shrugged.  
"Uh, Element's just walking away from le challenge. Is no one going to stop him?" Reu asked.  
"Maybe it can be a food eating contest...or a scavenger hunt in le louvre" Admin thought.  
Shinxy sneaked away from le contestants, waking towards Element.  
"Hey Shinxy, wait up. We gotta stick together" StarForce insisted, following close behind.  
Shinxy watched sadly as Element walked towards his crowds of fans.  
"Haha Shinx_Fucker because he fucks Shinx I like this guy" somebody said.  
"Purr..." Shinxy said, rubbing his hand one ground.  
"What was that supposed to signify, exactly? Oh whatever" StarForce brushed off.  
"Oh hey Shinxy. Feeling emotional? Why don't you sing about it while I try to think of ideas?" Admin insisted.  
"Sing? Shinxy can barely form a sentence. He's a terrible and worthless piece of existence" Nicholas said.  
"That's right honey" Riley agreed.  
"Please don't call me honey" Nicholas requested.  
"Alright StarForce lip sync for Shinxy" Admin said.  
"Oh uh I don't think I want to do that" StarForce started sweating.  
"DO IT MAN. DO IT" J screamed into StarForce's face.  
[Song #17 - Guy All le Bad Furs Want]  
StarForce and Shinxy followed Element as he moderated le citizens.

StarForce but it looks like Shinzh:  
10 o'clock, Sunday night and I'm waitin'  
To finally talk to le guy a little less weirder than me.  
His name is Elly, he's a gamer with a portal gun,  
He has Reddit gold, but I'm not quite sure what that means.

-  
Shinxy watches Element sign autographs

And when he walks,  
All le wind blows and le angels sing.  
But he doesn't notice me!

-  
Element's sitting on his computer laughing

'Cause he is watchin' Joel streams

-  
Element's sitting on his computer fapping

Creamin' over lewd Pokes

-  
Element's sitting on his computer listening to high quality rips

Listenin' to Gilvasunner

-  
Element's sitting on his computer deciding which posts to remove and which to not

Moderation in his eyes  
It's like a bad movie

-  
Element walks right by Shinxy without seeing him

He is lookin' through me  
If you were me, then you'd be

-  
Shinxy falls to le ground

Screamin' "Someone shoot me!"  
As I fail miserably,  
Tryin' to get le guy all le bad furs want.  
He's le guy all le bad furs want!

He likes le rips and I like Satanic Rituals  
His iPhone playlist's full of singers that are outdated memes  
He says he'd like to score some karma and Twitter mutuals  
He'll never know that I'm his fan he'll never have  
And when he walks,  
All le wind blows and le angels sing.  
He'll never notice me!  
'Cause she is watchin' Joel streams  
Creamin' over lewd Pokes  
Listenin' to Gilvasunner  
Moderation in his eyes  
He likes 'em with a fedora  
Penny Arcade three day pass  
Drivin' in a Hybrid  
Do heelies make me a kid?  
It's like a bad movie  
He is lookin' through me  
If you were me, then you'd be  
Screamin' "Someone shoot me!"  
As I fail miserably,  
Tryin' to get le guy all le bad furs want.  
He's le guy all le bad furs want!  
He's le guy all me bad furs want!  
He's le guy all le bad furs want!

-  
Shinxy watches as Element tries on turtlenecks and fedoras from behind le store window

There he goes again  
With his neckbeard on, and untouched messy hair  
He broke my heart, I want to be manless  
All I wanted was to hump him senseless!

-  
Shinxy sits alone watching Twitch on his computer, bags under his eyes

Now I am watchin' Joel streams

-  
Shinxy looks over his collection of profile picture trying to find le least bad one

Tryin' to be a lewd Poke

-  
Shinxy puts headphones on as water builds up in his eyes

Listenin' to Gilvasunner

-  
Shinxy looks over le posts of the Chuck E Cheese subreddit to make sure quality content is there

Moderation in my eyes

-  
Shinxy tries a fedora on in a shop but takes it off

I can't afford a fedora

-  
Shinxy sighs at his one day pass

And I ain't got no three day pass

-  
Shinxy looks at his gloves

All I got is fingerless gloves, gloves, gloves  
It's like a bad movie  
He is lookin' through me  
If you were me, then you'd be  
Screamin' "Someone shoot me!"  
As I fail miserably,  
Tryin' to get le guy all le bad furs want.  
'Cause he's le guy all le bad furs want!  
'Cause he's le guy all le bad furs want!  
'Cause he's le guy all le bad furs want!  
'Cause he's le guy all le bad furs want!  
(There he goes again)  
'Cause he's le guy all le bad furs want! (There he goes again)  
[the big finish]

Shinxy sadly watched as Element laughed with his Reddit friends.

"Terrible job StarForce. All you guys do is copy songs and replace certain words with something else. Next time try making your own song." Admin criticized.  
"It wasn't even my song it was Shinxy's" StarForce defended.  
"Wow so because it isn't your song you don't put effort in. Shameful, StarForce. Shameful." Admin shook his head.

StarForce sighed.  
As Mike and Satan were cuddling, Satan glanced over and saw Shinxy sitting by himself.

"Alright, so tell me about yourself. What do you like for music?" Isaac asked.  
"Meh" Gingerale shrugged.  
"Ok how about TV" Isaac asked.  
"Not really a TV guy." Gingerale shrugged.  
"What do you like then?" Isaac asked.  
"I love video games. I can talk about that a lot" Gingerale said, tipping his Charizard hat.  
"Pfft, video games. The lowest form of media." Nicholas mocked.  
"Nicholas can you go somewhere else I'm trying to build up relationship points with Isaac you're going to ruin my charisma" Gingerale complained.  
"NO! I don't want to hang out with STINKY RILEY" Nicholas shouted.  
"Stinky?" Riley repeated sadly.  
"You gotta do it Nick. Just find some common ground" Gingerale said.  
"No! I hate talking to freaks. Ok, hello Riley. Do you like...le government?" Nicholas asked.  
"Yes" Riley said.  
"Great off to a horrible start already." Nicolas said.

"Do you like music  
Do you like video games  
Do you like romantic dinners?" Riley asked.  
"What was that" Nicholas asked.  
"Just look over le possible questions to ask. Now which one would get the best response...hmm...I know. Nick boss, do you like music?" Riley asked.  
"No I'm le only person on le planet who doesn't like music. And for le love of God can we stop saying le for le majority of our vocabulary AAHHHHHHH" Nicholas screamed.  
"Oh are you into opera? I saw a Sonic cartoon about that once" Riley said.

Satan approached Shinxy. StatForce was sitting nearby.

"Oh hey Satan" StarForce greeted.

Satan picked StarForce up and tossed him away.

Fuck  
Talk to him about his feelings  
Leave  
Fuck. It's an option again I don't know why it doesn't make it any funnier the second time.

"So. You ok?" Satan asked Shinxy.  
"Idek. Everyone hates me. Element's le only one who really tolerated me. Maybe I should just leave..." Shinxy sighed.  
"It's ok. Who needs Element. I'm here for you."  
"Thanks, Satan" Shinxy thanked.

Satan held Shixy's paw. Shinxy licked the Grovyle's nose. Satan grabbed Shinxy's face and pulled it to his, giving him a kiss. Satan stuck his tongue in and started making out with Shinxy. Picking him up, he placed Shinxy on le ground and took his dick out. Satan sharpened his claws and dig them to le ground next to Shinxy.

A local walked by, whistling. He saw Satan and Shinxy having sex and turned around walking back le way he came.

"Has anyone seen Sam?" Robot asked, looking around.  
"ROBOT! ROBOOOOT!" Sam screamed.  
"Sam? SAM!?" Robot asked, running towards le scream. She found Sam curled up in a ball on le ground.  
"Sam what's going on?" Robot asked.  
"I'm trapped, Robot. This white guy trapped me in this invisible box! Because I called him pale! Help! Help!" Sam panicked.  
"Sam just stand up" Robot commanded.  
"I can't I'M STUCK" Sam screamed.

"And so le magic ball said, no. I was like, whaaaaat. Haha, so that was my Saturday night. How about yours?" Reu asked Jake as they shared a cup of coffee.

I jerked off  
I played video games  
I jerked off while playing video games  
I went to le movies

"I went to le movies." Jake said.  
"Ah, nice French film huh? The movies here kinda suck." Reu said.  
"FELLAS! FELLAS!" StarForce screamed, running up to Jake and Reu.  
"StarCorce run up to your own team you noodle head" Jake said.

"FELLAS! FRLLAS!" StarForce screamed to Marrowsky and Cloud.  
"What is it?" Marrowksy asked.  
"We gotta help Shinxy! He's having sex" StarForce panicked.  
"Help him have sex? Gross dude." Cloud said.  
"No, I mean. It's with le devil. Who knows what could go wrong!" StarForce panicked.  
"Yeah. That does sure sound like one hell of a problem" Marrowsky noted.  
"Also Satan is Mike's bf so he's cheating on him" StarForce said.

Cloud and Marrowsky gasped.  
"Wow. Didn't know Satan was a dick" Cloud said.

"So, Admin, what's le challenge again?" Jp asked.  
"I don't know lets just have a fashion show or something. Best wins. Hey yeah that's not a bad idea. Stealing ideas from Total Drama could help once in awhile. Alright everyone. Let's get to le Louvre to finish this once and for for this one episode." Admin said.

The haikuers gathered at le Louvre.

"Are we allowed to be in here?" Reu asked.  
"Are we allowed anywhere we go, Reu? Geez buzzkill. Ok I want to see three people from each team come out with their best fashion designs in 15. I strategically picked le number three because you can't tie when only one team wins each round. That's le kind of thinking that gets you a job as a host. Alright get to work" Admin said.

"Has anyone seen Satan?" Mike asked.  
"Aw, buddy. Satan is always with you if you believe" J said, rustling his hair.

"Alright what kind of ideas do we got?" Jp asked.  
"Tuxedos." Rydli suggested.  
"Turtlenecks. Coffee in hand. Bags under eyes" Kirby suggested.  
"How about we have them carry a plate of sushi to show their exquisite taste for le finer meals that reflect on their cultural appreciation?" Moogle suggested.

Everyone stared at him.

"I'll see myself out" Moogle said, walking away.  
"Can somebody get Element." Jp requested.  
"He's busy with his Reddit buddies" Ziggy said.  
"He needs to come home" Jp said.  
"And by home you mean on this show where everyone is held hostage far away from our actual homes. Alright he's my boyfriend for the day, I'll go get him" Marrowsky proclaimed.  
"Good, good. Now Joe, can you make an Empoleon hoodie?" Jp asked.  
"Can you pretend to be in charge and ask questions to make yourself look important?" Joe asked.  
"Uh, yes" Jp said.  
"I'm on it" Joe exclaimed.

Meanwhile with Team Jacob.

"Alright we need feathers, striped shirts, sandals, Ruby earrings, get this man a Beret. Hold on I gotta take this"

J picked up his cell.

"Talk to me Hope. No way, Luke did what?!" J asked.

Gingerale slapped le cell out of J's hand.

"No time J. We gotta get this shit together. We actually need somebody as gay as you for once, my heterosexualness can't be helpful here. We need you to work 24/7" Gingerale demanded.  
"We have 10 minutes"  
"Then that time"

Satan kissed Shinxy's lips, pulling him close to give him a hug. Shinxy purred and rubbed his head on le Grovyle's chest. Grovyle's eyes turned red and his claws sharply rose. He began caressing Shinxy's back, digging his claws in Shinxy's skin.

"Owie _ that hurt" Shinxy cried.  
"Good" Satan whispered.

Grovyle's body turned red hot, making Shinxy back away.

"What's going on ;-;" Shinxy asked.  
"You have sinned, Shinxy. And I am going to fucking murder your head off for being a terrible piece of SHIT" Satan screamed.  
"oooo :0: sounds kinky~" Shinxy moaned.  
"Also kinda edgy, could do without le tone"

"AND NOW for Le Annual Wait This Isn't An Annual Thing Oh Shit Everything I Say Is Being Translated On Screen Somebody Take Le Words Off Ugh Whatever Haiku Drama Fashion Show" an announcer shouted.

"First up for Team Jacob is Riley's Sonic 20th anniversary special" Imboo read.

Riley walked down the stage wearing a Sonic hoodie with Sanic drown crudely on hit shirt with "happy 20th" written above. He held Shadow under his arm.

"For Troll Slaiyers we got Pantz and her hipster Frenchie look" Imboo read.

Pantz walked down wearing a black turtleneck and beret, holding a cup of coffee and sweatpants. A paintbrush in le other.

"Now I gotta say. I like le self aware post ironic look of le hipster. I'd give it a solid 8.5. Sonic? Pretty stupid. I'm more of a Silver fab. 6.0 because it's so stupid I like it." Admin said.  
"Uh same" Tim said.  
"Sonic is gay 0.0 Pantz is cool 10.8" Imboo said.

"Troll Slaiyers take le first point" Admin declares.

Sam waddled out next.

"I can't get out. Can somebody help find that mine? Gee this is embarrassing haha bro" Sam said.

Joe came prancing out in her fabulous Empoleon hoodie. With le exact colors of an Empoleon, it was like looking at an Empoleon or something. That's a penguin Polemon btw if you don't know.

"Hmm. Y'know. Sam's box art strikes a chord with me. It's a metaphor for how we feel trapped and compressed in our lives. We feel claustrophobic about all of life's pressure. I give it a 9.9 because I'm that one guy. Empoleon gets a 7, not very original. More like donut steel material." Admin said.  
"Uh same" Tim said.  
"Empoleon is cool but judges always have le same opinions on this show so Sam 9 Joe 2" Imboo said.

Team Jacob 1, Troll Slaiyers 1, let's finish this up boys and girls.

Shinxy ran as far as he could to escape Satan, chasing him through le louvre.

"Yeah, yeah. That's LE Shinx_Fucker" Element chuckled, signing another autograph.  
"Hey Element" Marrowksy said.  
"Oh hey Marrowsky. Should have seen that last kid's submission. It was a question we already have answered in our frequently asked questions section. What an idiot." Element rolled his eyes.  
"I'm still here, wee" le kid replied.  
"Yeah whatever. What did you want Marrowsky" Element asked.  
"Le team needs you back. I mean, not that your skills are actually required at le moment. But we don't really want to be a man down, Y'know" Marrowksy said.  
"Marrowsky, Marrowsky, Marrowsky...Marrowsky. I'll come back when I'm ready. I have a lot more fun with these guys. They respect me. I'm not some stupid joke." Element said.  
"Element, you're not a joke. You're our Wolverine. You're le one who gets all le screen time and movies while characters like Gambit and Cyclops get nothing." Marrowsky said.  
"Well whatever, that's not always a good thing." Element snapped back.  
"You heard what Admin said back then. You used to be le butt of every joke but now you're modding subreddita and unifying haiku unions. We all get ragged on. It's part of being in le family" Marrowsky said.  
"Wow, I guess you're right Mattowsky. I'll come back only to not participate in le challenge" Element smiled.

Element and Marrowsky made their way back to le Louvre.

"Finally, we have J and his...J attire...and Cloud dressed as Palutena. How did that happen...alright whatever..." Imboo said.

J walked out with his scarf and glasses, sandals, and of confuse turtleneck. He twirled his scythe and pushed his glasses up. Cloud moved his arms a little in an attempt to look like he's dancing.

"Well, interesting. J clearly takes le show. That scythe is SO cool. 10. Palutena's a bad waifu so Cloud gets a 5." Admin said.  
"Gay. Palutena is a GOOD waifu. Cloud gets 10. And J gets 5 because fuck you." Imboo said.  
"Uh, same?" Tim asked.  
"To who?" Admin asked.  
"SAMs...idk I'm really high" Tim admitted.  
"Tim you stupid piece of shit I did this to AVOID A TIE WE NEED YOU TO BREAK LE TIE AND PICK A WINNER" Admin screamed.

Shinxy ducked and Satab leaped at him, flying above and crashing into le Mona Lisa.  
Security silent went off and red lights Hermes everywhere. Satan are le Mona Lisa.

"Wow. Not very good security for le Mona Lisa if you ask me" StarForce said.  
"Boo!" Mike said.  
"He's gonna kill me!" Shinxy shouted.  
"Good" Nicholas said.

Satan ran towards them. Shinxy got up on le runway where Satan jumped on top of him.

"AHHHHHHHGHHHGHHHH" Sam fumbled around in his box.  
"For crying our loud JUST STAND UP" Robot shouted.  
"AHHHHH! AHHHHH!"

Sam started breaking le box.  
A huge white flash clipped le room. As Sam stood up the fabric of time and space ripped apart and le entire louvre exploded. Everyone was sucked into a giant vortex and spit out on the other wise, where they fell onto the stairs in front of the louvre.

Element rubbed his head.

"What's going on?" Element asked.  
"Satan's about to kill Shinxy" Marrowsky said.

Elment's vision started to come together, he looked upwards and saw Satan grabbing Shinxy and shoving him into the pool. Attempting to drown him.

"Shinxy!" Element said.  
"Element you don't have to help him." Nicholas said.  
"Huh?" Element asked.  
"Think of all the times Shinxy has annoyed you. All the times you've wanted to get away from him. He's not even nice to you, he just wants your di*ck. It's StarForce's job to take care of him anyways. You gotta help your team finish the challenge" Nicholas advised.  
"Why would you help someone from the other team and what do I have to do with finishing the challenge?" Element asked.  
"Nothing. I'm just saying if you help Shinxy now he'll bother you more than ever. Who would throw away their chance at winning a challenge just to help someone who doesn't even like you back anymore" Nicholas asked.  
"Shinxy" Element said.

Element ran towards the pool. Element roundhouse kicked Satan in the back of the head and grabbed Shinxy.

Said Satan.

Element and Shinxy backed up as Satan prepared to attack them.  
"GODDAMIT if only we could out-cringe him with something" Element said.

Their hearts bested fast as StarForce stood in front of them.

"Look away. I don't want you to have to see this." StarForce warned.  
"Ok now I want to see even more" Element said.

StarForce pranced around and leaped on Satan.

"^_^ o hello thar! Who dis!?" StarForcd asked.  
"Uhh...Satan" Satan said.  
"o3o ehehhehe u wanna play? e3e?" StarForce asked.  
"What?" Satan asked.  
"Rawr x3 nuzzles how are you pounces on you you're so warm o3o notices you have a bulge o: someone's happy ;) nuzzles your necky wecky~ murr~ hehehe rubbies your bulgy wolgy you're so big :oooo rubbies more on your bulgy wolgy it doesn't stop growing ·/· kisses you and lickies your necky daddy likies (; nuzzles wuzzles I hope daddy really likes $: wiggles butt and squirms I want to see your big daddy meat~ wiggles butt I have a little itch o3o wags tail can you please get my itch~ puts paws on your chest nyea~ its a seven inch itch rubs your chest can you help me pwease squirms pwetty pwease sad face I need to be punished runs paws down your chest and bites lip like I need to be punished really good~ paws on your bulge as I lick my lips I'm getting thirsty. I can go for some milk unbuttons your pants as my eyes glow you smell so musky :v licks shaft mmmm~ so musky drools all over your cock your daddy meat I like fondles Mr. Fuzzy Balls hehe puts snout on balls and inhales deeply oh god im so hard~ licks balls punish me daddy~ nyea~ squirms more and wiggles butt I love your musky goodness bites lip please punish me licks lips nyea~ suckles on your tip so good licks pre of your cock salty goodness~ eyes role back and goes balls deep mmmm~ moans and suckles" StarForce said and did.

Satan cried and curled up Into a ball. Mike walked over and shoved him slowly into his mouth and down his throat.

"I love inflation" Mike smiled.

The haikuers gathered at the stairs of the louvre.

"Alright, so what the FOX just happened in the last 10 minutes?" Marrowsky asked.  
"It seems we were stuck in some kind of parallel universe where time was stopped. We were stuck on the same day for ages and couldn't get out of it" Admin explained.  
"Ok, but, how?" Berserker asked.  
"When we crashed into that church. It wasn't just any church. It was the Note Dame!" Admin explained.  
"Ok, but, that's a location. Doesn't quite answer anything. Didn't make this puzzle any cleared" Berserker said.  
"So that's how we got in this alternate dimension where we couldn't proceed in time it has nothing to do with me being lazy" Admin explained.  
"How exactly do we know this is an alternate dimension anyways? How do we knowing isn't made up?" Pseduo asked.  
"Ok guys geez for people who have just been dropped Into another dimension you sure do have a lot of questions" Admin complained.

Rydli dropped a pile of books down.

"Read em" Rydli ordered.  
"The...The Berenstein Bears...holy shit...they were right, it was a parallel universe" Jp exclaimed.  
"Yeah, and that explains why nobody wanted to go on a sushi date either! Right? Am I right? Huh? People here will say yes to sushi dates right?" Moogle asked.

Bradley Cooper walked up to the haikuers.

"Whoa it's Bradley Cooper" Cloud said.  
"Omg he's so gorgeous" Ziggy exclaimed.  
"I loved you in The Hangover and Guardians of the Galaxy even though it was just your voice" Joe shouted.  
"Hi all. I was just wondering if Pantz would like to go on a sushi date" Bradley Cooper asked.  
"Meh, don't like sushi. No thanks" Pantz shrugged.  
"Damn IT!" Moogle shouted, tossing his beret on the ground.  
"Alright Dew that'll be $10,000 for proving your point" Bradley Cooper requested.

"But WAIT? Who won?" StarForce asked.  
"Oh, uh. I liked J's scythe. So that team I guess" Tim said.

"Team Jacob wins everyone! After almost 4 months, we can finally leave! Haiku Drama World Tour is back on track, baby! Again!" Admin cheered.

All of the haikuers cheered , marching towards the plane and carrying J with them. They also tried carrying Element but he was fat so he fell. 

As the Troll Slaiyers slugged their way onto the plane, Bradley Cooper stood near the plane's stairway, interrupting the Team Jacob.

"Congratulations on winning the challenge, fans of Bradley Cooper" Bradley Cooper smiled.  
"Thanks Coop" Gingerale thanked, walking by.  
"Don't call me coop" Coop requested.  
"To commemorate your success as a team, I award you this" Bradley Cooper proclaimed, demonstrating a small pill between his thumb and index finger.

Ambient music played as the team exchanged glances.

"Finally, we can do drugs. We can split it between the five of us" Jake suggested.  
"But there's 13 of us" Lemon corrected.  
"Alright Lemon you don't get any of the drug" Jake frowned.  
":(" Lemon sad faced.

"This is no ordinary drug. Use it when the time is right." Bradley Cooper advised, tossing it to the group.

Robot caught the pill and examined it. Bradley Cooper walked away.

"Hey, wait. Mr. Cooper. Can I get an autograph?" Isaac asked, tugging at his shirt.  
"No, you're gay" Bradley Cooper said, brushing Isaac off and continuing to walk away.

The rest of the team boarded the plane, only for Robot to be stopped in the middle of her walk towards first class by Sam and Jake.

"Bro. Bro, bro, bro. Bro. Bro. Which one us gets to hold onto the pill?" Sam asked.  
"Me, I'm holding it right now." Robot answered.  
"You? A girl!? You want it all to yourself, huh? Bitch. Why don't you share it with the rest of us!?" Sam barked.  
"It's a pill, not a toy. It's not really significant who ho-"

Sam leaped on Robot, trying to pry the pill out of her grasp.

"Calm down, Sam. Geez. Why do you guys want it so bad?" Robot sternly questioned.  
"I have a migraine" Reu whined.  
"I don't think Bradley Cooper gave us this prize to use it 5 minutes later for a headache. What even makes you think it's that kind of drug?" Robot asked.  
"Hey what if Mike held onto it. He loves Kooky Drugs" Jake suggested.  
"More of a coke guy" Mike shrugged, snorting a pile off J's back.

[J in le confession toilet]  
"Omg did you see me back there? I'm starting to show up in the background near MIKE! Me and him are really starting to become pals aaaaaaaa"  
[le end]

"Alright, fine. I'll let someone else hold onto it. I'll leave it in the hands of one of the most trustworthy and well respected haikuers on the team" Robot declared.

Everyone eagerly anticipated their name to be called.

"Berserker" Robot said.

Everyone mumbled disappointingly amongst each other before dispersing.

[Robot in le confession toilet]  
"I've never really been in any of those haiku messaging groups. Everyone still likes Berserker, right?"  
[le end]

Troll Slaiyers were eating dinner in the dining room.

"So, guys, who you gonna vote for?" Kirby enthusiastically asked.  
"Kiiiiiirrrby, now's not the time to talk about voting!" Jp shunned.  
"/)-/-(\ oh..." Kirby replied.

Rydli peeked down at the far other end of the table, where Element was sitting with Shinxy.

"You know, Element sure has been spending a lot more time with his "other friends" than us" Rydli casually brought up.  
"Yeah, it's pretty cool. We're all expanding our friend groups! I've been meeting lots of people too!" Kirby agreed.  
"No, I mean, he's been spending so much time with these Reddit guys he's forgetting about us" Rydli complained.  
"Oh it was just one day. And he's still here. Nobody was hurt" Kirby shrugged, digging into their mystery meat.  
"We are hurt. We lost the challenge. And he's one of the people that couldn't even answer a question about his lover!" Rydli shot.  
"Man anyone else miss that cultural French food? I kinda wish I packed some so I wouldn't have to eat this poopie Imboo made" Moogle said.  
"Didn't you get a question wrong too?" Kirby asked.  
"Yes but that was an intellectual misconception. Element didn't know because he was hanging with Reddit all day!" Rydli cried.

From the other side of the table, Elemenf watched Rydli. He put some vegetarian meat in his mouth and asked Shinxy,

"Hey. Shinxy, do you think the other guys might be a little mad at me?"

Element turned to see Shinxy putting his penis in Element's bowl.

"Hhhh, Rawr?" Shinxy said.

"You gonna finish that?" Ziggy asked Element.

Element shoved the bowl to Ziggy and left the table, walking to the elimination chamber.

"Hey I bet it's still better tasting than what they serve in airlines these says. Am I right Marrowsky?" Cloud asked Marrowsky, nudging his arm.  
"Am I right? Am I right? Am I right?" he kept asking.  
"Something Grenade would say" Grenade said.  
"YES OK. I USED TO ROLEPLAY. I DID WHAT I HAD TO DO. OK? YOU CAN ALL STOP STARING! I DID A DARK THING TODAY BUT I DID IT FOR US ALL! I AM ONLY HUMAN!" StarForce shouted, running away from the table in tears.

Everyone just watched him run away in silence for a moment before going back to their conversations.

"Am I right?" Cloud asked again.

The chef boyardee can rolled past the Eiffel Tower.

Later, at the elimination ceremony.  
The Troll Slaiyers were all seated, ready for the usual elimination procedures to take place. The team sat across three rows.  
The first row has Rydli, Mr. Moogle, Jp, Kirby, and Joe. The second row seated Carz, Marrowsky, Psuedonym, Grenade, and Ziggy. The final, lowest row had Element, Shinxy rubbing his head on his leg, StarForce, Pantz, and finally Cloud.

"I know this is always a difficult time for you. Having to pick out one of your dear teammates to say goodbye to" Admin began.

Kirby nodded sadly.

"Meh" Cloud shrugged.

"You all know how it goes by now. 15 of you stand before me. Or, sit. Shit, I meant sit. Ugh, ruined the moment. Whatever. I have 14 cans of Mountain Dew: Code Red. Oh wait! 14 cans but 15 haikuers? That can only mean one thing, one of you will be going home...and dewless at that. You all voted. I hope. So let's get to it and say who's safe" Admin commenced.

[Kirby in le confession toilet]  
Kirby looks over all of the passports, trying to decide which to stamp and signing.  
[le end]

[Rydli in le confession toilet]  
Rydli darts his eyes toward his targeted passport and stamps it firmly.  
[le end]

[Cloud in le confession toilet]  
Cloud looks over each passport one at a time.  
"Hmm, good memes, alright memes, bad memes but they're ironically good, hmm, this one's pretty dreck."  
Cloud stamps the passport.  
[le end]

"Now to make this interesting I thought I'd distribute couple by couple. We kek things off with my girl Moogle and his gf Pantz" Admin began, tossing some red Dew to the two of them.

"Also safe, Grenade and Kirby, as well as Ziggy and Joe" Admin continued, passing Mountain Dew to each of the four.

Grenade and Kirby smiled at each other as they received their soda, as did Ziggy and Joe"

Lest were Rydli, Jp, Marrowsky, Psuedonym, Element, Shinxy, StarForce, and Cloud. And Carz.

"Cloud is safe tonight. As are Psuedo and Carz" Admin continued, passing them Dew.

"Yay" Pseudo said.  
"AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH THE SHIT CONTINUESB!" Carz screamed.

Rydli, Jp. Element, Marrowsky, Shinxy, and StarForce were left.

"Jp. The Rydli. You'll both be enjoying another hectic location on this tour" Admin said, passing then Mountain Dew.

Jp smiled and Rydli lifted the can as a dumbbell, showing off his biceps.

"Element. Marrowsky. Shinxy. StarForce. One of you WILL be going home tonight" Admin reminded them.

The four looked at each other nervously. Except for Shinxy, who didn't care, and purred as he rubbed against Element more. Element groaned, hiding a small smile at the corner of his mouth. Marrowsky sat with a straight glance, trying not to seem too fazed. StarForce was biting his nails nervously, swear pouring down his face and tears streaming down from his eyes.

"Shinxy, StarForce. You two are safe." Admin spoke softly, tossing them the cans.

StarForce cried with happiness as he caught his can. The other can went right over Shinxy's head.

Element and Marrowsky's jaws dropped and they looked at each other nervously.

"Element and Marrowsky. You are the two final haikuers. And only one can remain. I'm sorry to say, but one of you is about to have your world tour cut short." Admin proclaimed.

Marrowsky's heart sank. He continued to try and remain calm. He slowly inhaled and exhaled, clearing his throat and watching Admin's lips, waiting for him to finish talking and end the torment of suspension. Compared to Element, Marrowsky's chances looked grim. But he remained hopeful, anything could happen, his fate was not sealed just yet. Not until those words left Admin's lips.

Element's heart pounded as sweat gathered on his head. He removed his fedora and placed it on his lap, swiping the sweat off his forehead. He clenched onto Shinxy, whose eyes were now wide open and fixated on the final can. Despite Element's popularity, he couldn't help but feel terrified. All it takes is one bad day to be sent home. One strategic move from an alliance. One deciding vote that could kick off even the most talented of players. You can't help but feel your efforts were futile in that moment. In the position of the bottom two, your hopes are all flushed away as you realize every conceivable fault you may have ever committed.

"The final can...goes to..."

Element closed his eyes. Marrowsky held tightly onto his seat.

Admin opened his mouth to deliver the final answer, but was haulted by Shinxy, crying out

"EEEEEEAAHHHHHHP"

as he stumbled to the ground. Collecting himself, Shinxy stood up before his teammates to speak.

"B4 u finnish, I Hav somthnun 2 say" Shinxy confessed.

"Why is he talking like a southerner?" Moogle whispered to Kirby.

"Wait, no, Shinxy. I'm sorry. I, liked having you as a friend. You didn't like me because I had a funny username or because I did stupid things, you liked me for me" Element explained.

"Mostly because you have a Shinx as your icon" Rydli chipped in.

"You've been nice to me. You don't criticize me. Maybe you can be too affectionate of me but I don't care anymore, you aren't hostile about it." Element continued.

"It's really mostly because you have a Shinx icon" Pseudonym agreed.

"The thing is, at the end of the day, even when I mess up big, I know you wouldn't go against me." Element continued.

"He's not nice just stupid" Moogle said.

"I know what it's like, being homeschooled. Being the laughing stock of all your friends. I don't care what anyone says, Shinxy. You're my friend. And I hope you get far in this. It's clear to me now that my time is up. I have to go. I want to stay, but my role has been fulfilled. And if pains me to say it, but my time is up. Even though I just said that three sentences ago." Element sadly finished, signing and walking past Shinxy.

Shinxy grabbed Element's shoulder and stopped him from walking any further.

"Element...thank you." Shinxy said.

Shinxy took a deep breath before continuing.

"StarFroce, showed me the porn. He brought me there, and introduced me to the one. And that's when I realized, everything became clear to me" Shinxy explained.  
"Wut" Element exclaimed.  
"I remembered. The truth is...I'm Mew..." Shinxy confessed.  
"Wut" Element exclaimed.  
"In my previous life, I was Mew. That's why I was so sexually attracted to you. I was sent here so you could fuck me and become a Mew fucker, Element." Shinxy explained.  
"Wut" Element exclaimed.  
"I came here to become the cutest 3 couple evurr~, but I soon realized the problem. I wasn't anthro. The reason you didn't love me back was because you only liked anthro Mew, and I didn't fit the bill" Shinxy explained.  
"This, uh, gotta say this isn't the direction I was expecting this to go in" Element rubbed his back.  
"You see Element, I'm not meant to be here. I was unsuccessful in having sex with you. It isn't you who has to go Element, it's me." Shinxy finished, closing his eyes and backing up.

A transparent, pink bubble enveloped Shinxy. Soft, white bubbles floated around it. Element backed away a bit and watched as Shinxy opened his eyes. The bubble slowly started moving backwards towards the exit of the plane. Element put his hand out to grab Shinxy but he moved away too quickly. Admin tossed a parachute into Shinxy's bubble as the bubble moved closer to the exit door. Element ran towards it but it flew out the door and started levitating up towards the clear night sky, glittering against the moonlight.

"No! No! Shinxy! SHINXY!" Element shouted out the door.

Element fell to his knees, watching Shinxy ascend to the skies. Marrowsky sat dumbfounded in his seat.

"I'm just gonna leave this here..." Admin said, placing the Mountain Dew can next to Marrowsky's seat.

"Since Shinxy never opened his can, he never actually claimed it. So Element can have his" Admin declared.

The rest of the team got up and sluggishly made their way to the lower class to get some sleep.

"Why did it have to be my ship ;-;" StarForce sadly said as he watched Element stare out the door.

Joe and Ziggy bumped into each other at the door, but Ziggy backed away and let Joe enter first.

"Ladies first" Ziggy smiled.

Jos smiled back and walked through the door. Ziggy followed behind, smiling but then frowning as he started to think.

Pantz remained at the bench, sketching something on her notepad. Cloud was walking towards the exit but saw Ziggy and Joe, and then looked back at Element. He looked at Pantz and walked toward her.

"Hey." Cloud said.  
"Hey." Pantz responded, looking up from her notepad.  
"You, uh. Do you like sushi? Or as I like to call it, the sush?" Cloud asked.

Pantz smiled at him before answering.

Blooberri and Berserker were having out in the bathroom.

"What did you want to show me in this smelly bathroom Berserker? Did you find out a cool recipe for toilet water hot coco?" Bloo asked.  
"No. I wanted to show you my turtle" Berserker said.  
"Cool. Why in the bathroom though?" Bloo asked.  
"We're safe here." Berserker explained.  
"Oh..." Bloo responded.

Berserker pulled out his turtle tank with his turtle inside.

"Ooo" Bloo said, watching the turtle.  
"Let me just check my turtle filter" Berserker said, checking the turtle filter.

A small plastic bag fell out of Berk's pocket.

"Oh hey, you dropped this" Bloo said, picking the bag up.

Inside the bag was the pill rewarded earlier.

"Thank" Berserker said, taking the plastic bag from Bloo.

"Hey. Maybe I can dip this in the toilet water so whatever dipshit decides to take this gets potty in their mouth" Berserker suggested  
"That's devious dude. I like it." Bloo smiled.

Berserker unzipped the bag and grabbed the pill with two fingers, but it slipped out of his grasp and into the turtle tank.

"O shiet" Berk cried.  
"Oh no, should we get it out?" Bloo panicked.  
"No! Don't put your hands in the tank, it'll get dirty" Berserker warned.

The two watched as the pill sank to the bottom, landing a few inches from Berk's turtle.

"What do we do?" Bloo asked.  
"Let's just find another pill and pretend that's the one. In le meantime I'll keep my turtle hidden from the normies" Berserker said, grabbing the tank and leaving the bathroom.

Lemon walked into the bathroom.

"Oh hey guys what's going on in-"

Berserker grabbed the toilet lid and smashed it off Lemon's head. Lemon collapsed on the ground. Bloo and Berk ran away. A few seconds later Lemon awoke, standing up and holding his head. He looked around the bathroom.

"Ow, that's the fifth time this week. I really gotta watch what I'm doing in the bathroom" Lemon noted.

"And then there were 27. Another episode goes by, and we're getting closer to a reasonable amount of characters to deal with. Which OTP will survive? Which team will thrive? Will, uh...hmmm, will uh, will someone be eaten alive? Maybe! Find out next time on Hwiju Drams Wodl Tour." Admin closed off.

"Can you please leave I'm trying to do a pee" Lemon asked him.

End of Day 356  
Initiation at 31.58%

19-20-17-19-11-4 / 15-14-22-4-17


	14. Japanese Toilets

Chapter 13: Japanese Toilets

LAST TIME ON HAIKU DRAMA WORLD TOUR HAIKU WENT TO FRANCE FOR VALENETINS DAT IN JULY SATAN GOT SUMMON BUT DIED OF SEX SHINXY WENT HOME DIDN'T FUCK ELEMENT THO OK BYE

"men" said Riley.  
"Somebody say men? Cause I am, THE MAN" Sam shouted, flexing a bicep.  
"Hey Sam. Can you give me advice on what kind of waifu pillow I should buy?" Riley asked.  
"Waifu? What are you, 16? WAIFUS ARE FOR NO-LIFE-U's ASSHOLE" Sam screamed, pinching Riley off his chair.

[Riley in le confession toilet]  
"I swear every time I try making friends with someone here I get kicked punched or laughed at. It's not like I do anything wrong to them! Ugh, I need to have sex with someone to relieve my stress. Without a condom, of course. As sex was intended."  
[le end]

[Jake in le confession toilet]  
"Riley's YouTube career has made a drastic change in the last several months. He stopped doing his reviews so it's mostly been...  
[le end]

"Street Fighter 5 Practice for EVO 2016, February 23rd 2016  
Street Fighter 5 Practice for EVO 2016, March 1st 2016  
Street Fighter 5 Practice for EVO 2016, March 22nd 2016  
Street Fighter 5 Practice for EVO 2016, May 16, 2016  
Street Fighter 5 Practice for EVO 2016, June 29th 2016" Nicholas read, rapidly scrolling through GenesisFrenzy's channel.  
"All of these videos are just Street Fighter. Every day. Sometimes 6-9 hours long." Nicholas observed.  
"How does he even find time to do this while on the plane?" Isaac asked.  
"Oh. Hey. GenesisFrenzy here. You guys checking out my YouTube?" Riley asked.  
"Oh yeah we're huge fans" Nicholas said.  
"I'm almost at 460 subscribers. Once I get to 500 I should do something special" Riley said.  
"Perhaps the ultimate lifeform can star in this special of yours?" Riley's Shadow the hedgehog plushie asked.  
"Not now Shadow I'm trying to look cool in front of The Dudes. So, you guys banging any chicks?" Riley asked casually.  
"Riley sure hasn't been" Shadow mumbled.  
"You know what Shadow? You know what? Who cares! I don't have to be sexually active! I'm not old enough. Why don't you go get laid and act all high and mighty about it, I'm going to happily stay a virgin and masturbate to my Amy Rose porn collection instead." Riley screamed at the plushie.

Nicholas and Isaac got up and slowly walked away.

"Guys wait! Wait! Ugh." Riley sighed.

Jake, Mike, Lemon, and J were hanging OUT near the airplane windows, sitting in the small booth. Lemon peeked out the window, gazing at the clouds.

"I wonder where we're going next. Maybe JAPAN, or or Russia! Russians are hot." J exclaimed, pushing up against Lemon and smothering him against the wall to get a peek out the window.  
"Maybe we're going to hte shrek swamp or krogre inc" Mike guessed.  
"Guys, guys. Think about it. This next place has got to be special" Jake predicted.  
"What's not special about Shrek's swamp?" Lemon asked.  
"Shraak's samp is find, I'm just saying, think about it. We've almost been on the plane for a year now. For the one year anniversary we must be going somewhere big" Jake said.  
"Wow, a year? Time flies. That was a plane joke. Anyways, I can't believe it! By time a year passed Haiku Drama Island was already over" J reconciled.  
"Wow, a year. That's cool I guess, but maybe Admin won't make a big deal about it. He probably doesn't want to celebrate a special day again" Lemon guessed.  
"Why?" Jake asked.  
"Well we have a history of being late" Lemon said.  
"Name one time" Jake demanded.

[3 chapters ago]  
"Alright guys, I know it's Thanksgiving and all, but I still think this Halloween special can work if we just keep the spirit alive"  
[2 chapters ago]  
"Alright so the last time was a mishap. We were off by a few weeks, but we have dedication this time. There is no way we're gonna miss Star Wars' release date. This is too big to mess up"  
[1 chapter ago]  
"OK WHATEVER. We can pass it off as a joke. We've had a lot of time off so we're prepared. We're gonna go in and have this done by Valentine's Day. We will NOT be late again. Not by a month. Not by a week. NOT BY A DAY"  
[now]

"Whatever. But you're missing the point. If it's the anniversary, we might get something special. Liek free cake. Or strippers. OR STRIPPERS THAT COME OUT OF CAKE" Jake shouted.  
"I'm a stripper" Mike added.

Reu was playing footsie with Garchomp Jesus. Reu approached them and sat down by them.

"Hey guys. What's up?" Reu asked.  
"Gar Gar" Garchomp said.  
"Yeah mostly Gar Gar" Gingerale agreed.  
"So, Gingerale. You haven't been talking to your usual group lately" Reu noticed, looking behind and seeing Nicholas and Isaac sitting alone by the doors.  
"Yeah, Y'know, I'm starting to think I'm more of an individual." Gingerale said to Reu.  
"That's uh, cool. What does that mean?" Reu asked.  
"Look, it's every Gar Gar for himself out here. Element, Rydli, and Moogle are loligagging on the other team, leaving me and Nicholas to fend for ourselves until the teams merge. I'm starting to think I work better as a lone wolf anyways. No strings tying me down." Gingerale explained.  
"Did somebody say loli?" Lemon asked.  
"Go away Lemon" Gingerale demanded.

Lemon sadly walked back to his group.

"Well if you're not too busy being a lone wolf maybe I can accompany you. We can work together and stuff. And be like a team" Reu offered.  
"What part of lone wolf don't you get, Zubat"  
"It's Reu-"  
"Yeah who cares"  
"The name aren't even remotely similar to each other, how did-"  
"LOOK, BITCHNnn!nnn! All of these teams and alliances, teams within teams, it's too much to keep track of." Gingerale scoffed.  
"Alright fine. What happened, anyways? Did you and Nicholas have a falling out? You seemed perfectly fine a few days ago?" Reu asked.  
"Holy shit Reu what's with all these questions when did you suddenly develop a fixation for me?" Gingerale asked.  
"Well now, look who's asking the questions." Reu smiled.

Berserker and Blooberri were sitting in silence.

"Did you know I'm in the underground toilet paper industry?" Blooberri broke the silence.

Meanwhile with th ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !

"You know we haven't really been slaiying that many trolls lately" Joe said.  
"Of course we have. Shinxy was a troll, right?" Moogle said.

Element sighed and turned away from the others.

"No, Moogle. You fucking idiot. Shinxy wasn't a troll, just stupid. Shinxy can't even fathom being in the ranks of trolls such as Ret and people who 9/11 memes" Rydli said.  
"Damn, Ret...never forget the time he trolled everyone with frog pictures in the most epic trolling of all time" Cloud reminisced.  
"Can we not acknowledge Ret's existence. And yeah, 9/11 jokes are pretty "xD im ofencive" edginess." Moogle added.  
"Man, edgy edgy edgy. I'm so tired of that word" Pantz exclaimed.  
"Ok" Cloud replied.  
"It just sounds so, idk, unprofessional or something. It just makes a sentence sound less profound" Pantz continued.  
"What is this? What is going on? Is this some sort of shtick?" Moogle asked.  
"I'm just tired of the word. You know what, I'm going to find a better word. Then my vocabulary will be enriched" Pantz announced.  
"Cool. So Rydli, how about them Xenogears?" Moogle asked.  
"Oh man, Xenogears. I know so much about that. I can spend all day just talking in a single room about Xenogears" Rydli replied.  
"Heh, heh, more like Xenoqueers if you ask me, heh, heh..." Grenade chuckled softly.

"Ugh, I hate these seats. It's so hot back here in second class or whatever. I think I'm sticking to the metal on the bench" Jp complained.  
"Cheer up, princess. We're winning this next challenge and going back to first class. I'm not spending another night in this oven" Marrowsky proclaimed, reading a book.

[Marrowsky in le confession toilet]  
"I need to work on my cardio, so I'm hoping this next location includes a physical challenge. Also I'm tired of sleeping next to these sweaty guys and want access to the first class exercising equipment"  
[le end]

Carz slept soundly on Marrowksy's lap, drooling and snoring memes as he was strapped to the wall. On Marrowsky's other side, Psedo was asleep as well, laying on Marrowsky's shoulder.

Marrowksy sighed.

"Hey, Marrowsky, what's your name?" Jp asked.  
"Marrowsky." Marrowsky answered.  
"No, but what's your real name. They didn't say it in the Paris challenge" Jp noticed.  
"There were several names unlisted, including Carz who we all know is named Scott. No need to single me out. I'm going to eat breakfast. It's the most important mean of the day." Marrowsky informed, getting up and leaving.

Pseudo fell on top of Catz, sucking his thumb as Carz whispered "grand dad" in his sleep.

"Attention passengers. Report to first class immediately. We're preparing to land" Admin shouted through the intercom.

The haikuers all grouped together with their team in first class. Marrowsky was eating a bagel.

"Psst. Just in case we lose, I volunteer Grenade as the person we kick off." Cloud whispered.  
"Cloud, you're whispering to me." Grenade informed him.  
"Oh, shit. Sorry bro. Was just sending you a message in code, so the actual person I meant didn't know I was talking about them" Cloud explained.  
"What code?" Grenade asked.  
"Oh, you know. Like, Grenade = ...Joe?" Cloud guessed.  
"Hey!" Joe respondenddd displeadedlg.  
"Oh come on you're not even in any of the main groups. I wasn't actually going to vote for you anyways I just needed to give Grenade a fake name so he doesn't know I'm voting for him" Cloud explained.  
"I'm right here" Grenade reminded him.

[Cloud in le confession toilet]  
"Ok I'm gonna stop trying to make alliances when the entire team is next to me"  
[le end]

[Grenade in le confession toilet]  
"Whatever I'm pretty sure Cloud doesn't even vote. Last week I was hiding in the toilet and I heard him stamp at least 7 times. Doesn't take that many to vote for one person"  
[le end]

[Cloud in le confession toilet]  
"Whatever I'll just vote for like 7 people again. There are so many irrelevants still here I just vote for them all until one goes away"  
[le end]

"Where are we going! Where are we going! Is it somewhere cool? WHERE IS IT?!" J asked excitedly, jumping up and down.  
"J you can just look out the window it's usually pretty obvious" Lemon said.  
"Well that would ruin the excitement!" J laughed.  
"Excitement's for losers. I like knowing everything ahead of time and...and...ok wow I can't think of a way to finish this sentence...this is embarrassing...can you cut to someone else?" Robot said.

"Today, we're visiting...Japan!" Admin confirmed.  
"Oh my godsh" J yipped.  
"Yay!" Kirby and Jp excitedly squeezed.  
"Wow cool. They have, like, anime there." Ziggy said.  
"Anime...anime...anime is..." Reu began.  
"Reu no" Jake said.  
"Anime...it's...it's..." Reu started to jitter.  
"Reu you don't have to do this. You don't have to make the joke. We can come up with new gags and not just repeat ones from 9 months ago" Jake warned.  
"Anime ISN'T DIO" Reu screamed.

Everyone went silent.

"No...no..." Gingerale looked around.

The haikuers unboarded the plane and looked around at the talk skyscrapers and anime girl posters.

"No...no..." Gingerale continued.

Crowds of busy people walked by and Gingerale looked up at the brightly colored screens showcasing Japnese shit.

[GingeraleDravon in le confession toilet]  
"FUCK. Fucking Japan. Every weeaboo's dream. Everybody is going to be creaming their pants all day while I'm trying to eat a burger or something or probably not because in JAPAN they're probably too good to have burgers. Fuck. Ginge out.  
[le end]

"Japan...oh...I'm...I'm back..." Riley said, trying to wipe away some tears.  
"What's his deal?" Lemon asked, arms crossed.  
"He went to Japan once and fell in love with a girl." Jake explained.  
"O" Lemon said.

[Rydli in le confession toilet]  
"Wow, first we saw London, then we saw France, and now Japan. Looks like we're using up all of the highlights. Hopefully we don't run out and have to resort to shitty ones like, Denmark, Mexico, and anything from the Middle East when I'm in the final 10."  
[le end]

"Now, now, I'm sure you're all excited to see some Japanese stuff. But we have a challenge to get to" Admin said.

"Do you want to go find a Japanese subway and see the people packed like sardines inside a train?" Moogle asked.  
"Sure" Grenade said.

The two began to walk away.

"Hey, wait. Guys. Challenge" Admin ordered, tapping his watch.

[Admin in le confession toilet]  
"Geez, maybe all those times I let them run loose around a city was a bad idea. Now they think they can do it anywhere"  
[le end]

"Ok whatever. Imboo, I need you to pick me up a new toilet since our current one is busted." Admin ordered, handing Imboo a list.  
"The toilet is fine" Imboo assured.  
"AAAA HELP IT'S SUCKING ME IN AGAIN" Joe screamed.  
"Ok whatever. Why did you give me a list when there's only one thing written on it?" Imboo asked, staring at the list, reading "#1 - toilet".  
"So you don't forget, just go." Admin groaned.

"How am I going to forget one thing" Imboo groaned, rolling his eyes and crumpling the paper up.

"Japanese toilets..." Grenade sighed.  
"What's the matter, Gre?" Moogle asked, putting his arm around Grenade.  
"Nothing." Grenade said.

"Alright, everyone. Let us gather here for our first challenge" Admin ordered.  
"Can't we just have one super long challenge that takes up the whole episode?" Pseudonym asked.  
"No. We're not doing that trashy shit no more. We're gonna be a civilized game show, that has variety and culture. Now who wants to play Fear Factor Japan edition?" Admin asked.  
"I don't" StarForce raised his hand.  
"Well you have to" Admin said.  
"Then why'd you ask?" StarForce asked.  
"I was being rhetorical, StarForce" Admin sighed.  
"You're a rhetorical" StarForce responded.

"Everyone gather. Take your shoes off and take a seat" Admin ordered  
"Finally, only wearing sandals makes me fit in here." J exclaimed.  
"Where are the seats? I only see small mats yo" Ziggy said.  
"Those are the seats. You're gonna sit cross crossed, like zen or whatever" Admin informed.  
"Isn't that more of a Chinese tradition?" Pseduo asked.  
"Also a gay tradition. Heh, heh" Grenade chuckled softly.  
"I don't care it's the same thing just do it" Admin ordered.

The haikuers sat down in four rows separating the two teams, mimicking the formation of two dining tables. The first row had Cloud, Pantz, Moogle, Marrowsky, Rydli, Jp, and Kirby. Sitting opposite of them were Pseudo, Ziggy, Joe, Carz, Element, Grenade, and StarForce.  
Sitting behind them were Jake, Lemon, Mike, Reu, J, Isaac, and Nicholas, and sitting opposite of them were Gingerale, Robot, Sam, Blooberri, Berserker, and Riley.

"We're gonna start everyone off with some meals. Your first food will be a classic Japanese meal, sushi" Admin announced.

Interns Parascout and Faline distributed the sushi to the haikuers, walking down the rows and placing a plate of sushi before each player.

"Oh boy, this should be a tough one. These guys really don't like sushi" Moogle chuckled, picking up his sushi and tossing it into his mouth.

He looked around to see everyone else doing the same.

"What the heck, I thought you guys thought sushi was lame" Moogle dumbfoundedly observed.  
"Well yeah, but I'm not about to lose 1,000,000 stars because I didn't eat a stupid plate of sushi." Pantz replied.  
"Hey, you know this is pretty good. Very cultural." Pantz smiled.

"Love me some sush" Nicholas said.  
"Well yeah, because you're Japanese right" Isaac said.  
"I'm quarter Japanese!" Nicholas corrected.  
"Whoa, really? Do you think you might know this girl I met in Japan once?" Riley asked.  
"Ah yes let me just check my Japanese people memory index" Nicholas replied.  
"Cool!" Riley said, eating some sush.  
"This is pretty lame" Sam shrugged, shoving his entire plate in his mouth.  
"What the heck it's a good" Robot said.

Every haikuer successfully completed the task of eating a sushi without dying.

"Team Jacob still has 13 members standing. Troll Slaiyers 14. Nobody down yet. But we're just getting started. Round 2: octopus." Admin announced.

Parascout and Faline distributed the octopi among the haikuers.

"I think mine's still alive" Pantz said.

Her octopus winked at her. Faline walked over and stabbed the octopus with a fork.

"Thanks" Pantz said, grabbing a fork and digging in.

Ziggy lifted his octopus and squeezed it. He felt the slimy texture of it before ripping a tentacle off one at a time and eating it.

"Yum. I used to eat octopus snacks all the time." Joe said, chewing on an octopus head.

Carz shoved the whole thing down his throat at once. Pseudo and StarForce gagged at the sight.

Mike slurped the whole thing and Sam put the entire octopus on his mouth and chewed it until digestistioaksnfhwkamz.

"This looks stupid" Reu claimed.  
"Reu you gotta eat it. We can't push out now. Eat that octopus or you'll be the joke of the team" Jake ordered.  
"Jeez since when have you been in charge?" Reu shot.  
"Uh, hello. Of course I'm in charge. Why else would the team be named after be? Because I'm the leader." Jake answered.  
"Oh, well I can't argue with that" Reu said, lifting the octopus.

The octopus latched on to Reu's face and started inking on him.

"Cool" Berserker watched from across.

Parascout stabbed the octopus and it stopped sucking Reu. Reu fell on his back with the octopus stuck on hit face.

"Feel free to eat it now" Parascout said.

"Alright, so far so good. Round 2 is over and all 27 haikuers are still standing. Round 3 will have squids!" Admin announced.

The squids were given to Le haikuers.

"Squid's not bad. Just some seafood" Gingerale shrugged.  
"Actually, we didn't cook them." Admin said.  
"Of course. Why would you" Jake said.

"Hey, this doesn't look so ba-"  
Reu's squid latches onto his face and started inking on him. Reu screamed and fell on his back. Parascout stabbed the squid and it stopped moving.

"Hey Lemon" Gingerale said.  
"Yeah?" Lemon asked.  
"Are you a, heh heh well uh are you a well are you ehhh ehhh well heh would you say are you more of a ehhh ehhh more of a aaaaaahhhh ehhhhh are you a kid or a squid?" Gingerale asked, holding his squid.

"god, this is so...bheijddzishavehdus" Elemenf bofed all over his half eaten raw squid.  
"Same" Kirby replied.  
"Element finish their squid or you are out" Admin ordered.  
"It has vomit all over it" Element complained.  
"I don't care eat it or you're out" Admin commanded.  
"Ugh, fine I'm out" Element said, forfeiting his squid and placing it back on its plate.

Carz picked up Element's vomit covered squid and devoured it. Element fainted.

"Round 3 ends. We still have Cloud, Pantz, Moogle, Marrowsky, Rydli, Jp, Kirby, Pseudo, Ziggy, Joe, Carz, Grenade, and StarForce for Troll Slaiyers, and Jake, Lemon, Mike, Reu, J, Isaac, Nicholas, Gingerale, Robot, Sam, Blooberri, Berserker, and Riley for Team Jacob. 13 V 13. Round 4's meal will have Shirako, otherwise known as fish sperm." Admin announced. Parascout and Faline passed out the fish sperm to all of the haikuers.

"This doesn't look so bad" Jake gulped, putting it in his mouth and swallowing.

Mike slurped up his whole bowl.

Pseudo watched Marrowsky and Rydli clean out their bowls as well.

"Yeah, no thanks" Psuedo said, pushing his bowl away.  
"Hhhh, ew" Jp agreed, pushing her bowl away.

Carz took both their bowls and dumped them down his throat.

"Yum. Love me some good 'ol sperm" Nicholas said, gulping his bowl down.

Isaac lifted a bite near his mouth and fainted.

"Chug chug chug chug chug" Jake and Lemon changed as Sam poured his down his bowl's contents into his mouth.

[Sam in le confession toilet]  
"I'm no homo, but for 1,000,000 stars on a site I don't even use anymore, I'd suck 1000 cocks"  
[le end]

"men men men men men-men-men" Riley screamed as he fainted from the sight of sperm.  
"Geez you act like you've never eaten sperm before" Nicholas rolled his eyes.

Bloo pushed her bowl away. Berk looked at it and then checked both his sides.

"Hey, nobody's looking. Do you want me to eat your fish sperm for you?" Berserker asked.  
"Oh, no it's ok. I'd get out soon enough regardless probably" Bloo shrugged.  
"It's no problem. Here, I got it" Berserker said, pouring Bloo's bowl into his own, then lifting it to his mouth and eating it all.  
"Oh" Bloo replied.

[Blooberri in le confession toilet]  
"Berserker's been pretty cool. Ever since Sunnia left I've been feeling sort of lonely, but now I've been hanging around him"  
1le end1

Grenade and Ziggy both shook their heads at their meal, and StarForce barely finished his, shaking his hand as he fed himself the last spoonful.

"Alright then, round 4 ends with Cloud, Pantz, Moogle, Marrowsky, Rydli, Kirby, Joe, Carz, and StarForce for Troll Slaiyers, and Jake, Lemon, Mike, Reu, J, Nicholas, Gingerale, Robot, Sam, Blooberri, and Berserker for Team Jacob. 9 V 11. Round 5: raw horse meat!" Admin announced.

Everyone groaned. The meals were passed out.

"Good. Horses have never done anything for me" Nicholas said, digging in.

Sam chewed into his horse meat viciously, ripping it in half and swallowing one half right there.

"This horse meat's almost as long as my meat, that's hung as a horse, if you know what I mean, right, heh!" Lemon joked.  
"Lemon that joke was gay" J said.

[J in le confession toilet]  
"I didn't want to eat the poor little horseie. But, if was already dead. It's not like not eating it will save him..."  
[le end]

Marrowsky lifted his sunglasses to get a closer look at the meat, then let them drop and slowly began eating his pieces

"Mmmm, yeah, no, raw horse meat isn't for me" Kirby said, pushing the plate away.  
"Mm, cultural!" Pantz said, enjoying hers.  
"Nbnffnnfhehaan" StarForce groaned, piling on his as a piece touched his mouth.  
"Weak" Cloud tainted, putting some meat in his mouth.  
"Got any soy sauce for this?" Cloud asked.  
"No" Admin answered.  
"Weak sauce" Cliud sighed as he swallowed a piece.  
"Just pretend it's Trenderhoof. Just pretend it's Trenderhoof" Moogle whispered to himself, eyes closed, as he are his meat.

"Nah" Gingwrale said, pushing his plate away.

"I don't think I can eat this..." Bloo said, touching hers with a fork.  
"I got it" Berk proclaimed, shoving her entire fish into his mouth.  
"Berserker you really don't have to do that, it's just going to fill you up faster" Blooberri warned.

"Everyone done? Good alright, Cloud, Pantz, Moogle, Marrowsky, Rydli, Joe, and Carz for Troll Slaiyers, and Jake, Lemon, Mike, Reu, J, Nicholas, Robot, Sam, Blooberri, and Berserker for Team Jacob. 7 V 10. Round 5: wasabi." Admin announced.

"Wasabi on what?" Moogle asked.  
"Nothing. Just wasabi. Straight up wasabi" Admin said.  
"I love wasabi!" J exclaimed.  
"Easy round" Jake declared.

Each haikuer was given their plate of wasabi.

"I don't know if I want to eat a whole plate of wasabi..." Reu said.

"Just eat it all at once, that way you'll get it over with" Jake said.

Reu lifted his entire plate and dumped it all into his mouth.

"AAAAAA" Reu screamed, grabbing his nose as blood poured out. Reu fell back as his blood drenched his shirt.

Lemon took a few bites and fell over.

"Weak" Jake said.

J shoved the whole thing in his mouth, smiling as he swallowed it.  
Berserker was almost finished with his plate when he looked at Blooberri's.

"You don't have to-"

Berk grabbed some wasabi from Bloo's plate and shoved it in his mouth. His nose grew hot and water built in his eyes, he fell face first into Bloo's plate of wasabi.

"Uh, check please?" Bloo asked.

The studio audience roared in laughter.

"easy stuff" Rydli said, eating his entire plate.

Marrowsky shrugged and dumped his entire plate in his mouth, pinching his nose as he swallowed.

"Ahahazzz)-))-...)-)-))...ha.".. Cloud failed, blood shooting out of his nostrils.  
"Did he see one of his waifus again?" Joe asked, eating some of her wasabi.

"Alright alright, congrats, congrats. You made it to round 6. Pantz, Moogle, Marrowsky, Rydli, Joe, and Carz for Troll Slaiyers, and Jake, Mike, Reu, J, Nicholas, Robot, and Sam for Team Jacob. 6 V 7. Enjoy a glass of water before your next meal." Admin said, and Parascout and Faline distributed the drinks.

As the haikuers gulped down their glasses, Rydli glanced over and noticed Robot didn't touch her glass. He smirked and picked his glass up, aiming it and tossing it at her. His glass smashed against her head, and the water dropped all over her. Electricity sparked as she short circuited. The rest of the haikuers finished gulping down their glass. Parascout and Faline collected the glasses.

"Round 6: Fugu. Otherwise known as the poisonous puffer fish. If not prepared correctly it could be deadly toxic." Admin explained.  
"But these are fine, right? They were all prepared by professionals right?" Rydli asked.  
"Yeah, yeah, sure. Most of them anyways. A few of them weren't. So risk reward, Y'know. Try not to be the one who gets puffed." Admin shrugged.

They all looked at their puffer fish worryingly.

Moogle closed his eyes and ate a piece of his fish. Nothing happened, so he let out a sigh of relief.  
Joe looked at her plate, sweat pouring down her face.

"I, uh, I'm not taking any chances" Joe said, pushing her plate away.

Rydli shrugged eating his casually.

"Yeah, I'm not about to have my face puff up" Marrowsky agreed, pushing his plate away.

Pantz ate hers slowly. Carz shoved the whole thing in his mouth and swallowed it whole.

Jake nervously lifted a piece to his mouth and chewed on it slowly. It seemed ok, so be continued to eat it. Mike are his in one bite. Sam did the same but twitched a bit afterwards. Robot fell over onto her plate. Parascout dragged her away.

"Exotic" J smiled, slurping his.

Nicholas ate his puffer fish with his eyes closed, enjoying it.

"Well, everyone else seems to be ok. Guess our team for pretty luck-" Reu started before gagging.

Reu fell over and started twitching wildly. He gasped for air as his face turned purple. Faline dragged him away.

"Pantz, Moogle, Rydli, and Carz for Troll Slaiyers, and Jake, Mike, J, Nicholas and Sam for Team Jacob. 4 V 5. Now for round 7. Dog meat!" Admin proclaimed.

"Ah dude what the heck" Pantz complained, latching onto her stomach.  
"Wasn't it Chinese who are dog?" Rydli asked.  
"Who cares we didn't eat in China, we're doing it now. Eat the doggo or be eliminated" Admin ordered.

The 9 remaining haikuers picked at their doggo reluctantly.

"Doggie..." J cried, getting up and running away.  
"I can't do this..." Jake said, covering his eyes.  
"Losers" Sam rolled his eyes, biting into his dog meat.  
"I'll just think of something else. Like I'm eating horse meat" Nicholas said, closing his eyes and eating the dog meat.

Mike ate the entire thing.

"Yum" he said.

Moogle and Pantz looked away from their plates and shoved them away.

Carz chewed on his dog and swallowed it, licking his lips and burping. Rydli kept his eyes shut and slowly are his a piece at a time. He threw up a few times but continued.

"Wow, nice. Only 5 haikuers left. For the Troll Slaiyers we got the duo Carz and Rydli" Admin congratulated.

Carz burped and Rydli tried not to fall over.

"And for Team Jacob we have Mike, Sam, and Nicholas" Admin congrats yuck.

Mike smiled, Sam licked his finger, Nicholas folded his arms to mimic a gangster.

"Next up for round 7. Cats" Admin said, handing out the dishes.

"Carz I'm not sure how much I, how much I, ugh, I can last...you got this right?" Rydli asked, chewing on his cat.  
"Gay" Carz said, walking up and leaving Rydli by himself.

"Kitty" Mike smiled, shoving it in his mouth.  
"Hey bro, remind you of anyone?" Sam asked, nudging Nick.  
"No" Nicholas responded.  
"I bet it makes you miss Shinxy, huh?" Sam asked.  
"No" Nicholas responded.  
"One thing he did have in common with a cat was a brain the same time, am I right? Dumb people" Sam laughed.  
"No. Don't insult cats with a comparison like that. His brain is smaller. Squirrels have bigger brains" Nicholas insisted.  
"Yeah, why do you care so much?" Sam asked.  
"I don't. What do you have have to do with this, Samuel Logan?" Nicholas asked.  
"I think you're fat." Sam laughed.  
"TAKE THAR BACK" Nicholas screeched, leaping on Sam and wrestling with him. The two pinched and kicked at each other until Faline and Parascout dragged them away.

[Sam in le confession toilet]  
"Ok, so I didn't want to eat fucking cat. But I couldn't let the team know I'm some sort of softie, so I had to find another way to get eliminated."  
[le end]

"And then there were two. Rydli of Troll Slaiyers and Mike of Team Jacob. For Round 8, we will be serving a delicacy I like to call, diarrhea." Admin announced, passing the two final bowls out.

"Are you serious?" Rydli asked, looking at his bowl.  
"Welcome to Japan." Admin said.  
"I don't think this is a regular Japnese dish" Rydli said.  
"How do you know Japan had a lot of crazy shit. Heh...hehe...shit...well anyways, uh, it's not even human shit. It's, uh, donkey shit" Admin suggested.  
"How does that make this any less disgusting?" Rydli asked sternly.  
"I don't know because it's animals. They eat animal eyeballs and hearts on Fear Factor" Admin shrugged.  
"There's a very fine line between eyeballs and fucking excrement" Rydli complained.  
"Ok, fine, pussy. Instead of shit you two have to eat...a donkey's ass" Admin said, ordering the donkey ass to be distributed.  
"Really, you just have a donkey's ass sitting around ready to be used. That's just wonderful." Rydli said.

Mike ate his donkey ass one buttcheek at a time. Rydli watched and twitches, he picked his donkey butt with a fork.

"Y'know, I think I'm a little full from the cat and dog meat." Rydli said.  
"Yay" Mike said.

"Team Jacob wins part 1 of today's challenge! They gain an advantage in the second part" Admin declared.  
"Really all that for an advantage. Who cares" Rydli said.

The rest of the teams walked out.

"Cool. Hey bro, now that that's over with, can we go check out some lolis?" Ziggy asked.  
"Hey that's right. The age of consent in Japan IS-" Rydli began.  
"No. No...No." Jp replied.  
"Come on dude. Some of us are only a few years older anyways" Cloud shrugsged.  
"I don't see how being in a different country makes you any more likely to get laid" Marrowsky said.

"Wait a minute, if we're in Japan. You know where we could go?" Pantz wondered.

All of the haikuers looked up at a tall building.

"Is that supposed to be the Hatena Headquarters?" Blooberri asked.  
"What? Oh, no. That's in a completely different city. That's just a hotel where we can see the cute little pod rooms. Finding the Hatena Headquarters sounds cooler though" Jake the dog said.  
"You guys can't just go wherever you want. We have a challenge to..." Admin tried to say, but everyone walked away and he sighed.  
"Whatever"

Imboo scrathed his head as he searched a mall.

"What was it I was supposed to be getting again?" he asked himself.

Imboo walked pass a Akihabara Gamers store. Glancimg through the wondow, he saw a stack of Wii U games. Super Smash Bros, Super Mario Maker, Splatoon, and the other two good Wii U games.

"I wonder…" Imboo spoke to himself, entering the game store. He switched glances between each shelf of Wii U games. He looked from the 1st party games down to the row of 3rd party games down to the row of shitty cash grab movie based games, but couldn't find it. He then looked down into the trash can, and there it was. He reached into the trash can and ulled out Star Fox Zero1!.

"Yasss. This is going to be great!" Imboo exclaimed.

Taking the game to the register, the Japanese man rang the game up.

"Ching chong ching chong 1 yen shittu" he requested.

"I don't have any yen but I can prostitute myself?" Imboo suggested.

"Ching chong ching chong nuuuuuuuuuuuuuu, sucky sucky me fucku you?" Japanese man asked.

"o-oh…" Imboo gulped.

The haikuers were embarking on their walk to stop world hunger. I mean find Hatena headquarters.

"Which way are we supposed to go exactly?" Jp asked.

"I don't know the whole thing is in fucking Japanese" Cloud exclaimed.

"Well we know the name of the area it is in, can't you just look for that name?" Mr. Moogle suggested.

"No asshole, it's in that weird letter shit thing that's impossible to read." Cloud explained.

"You mean Kanji? It's not impossible to read, you just need to learn it." Rydli said.

"None of us are Asian, though?" Pantz said.

[Pantz in le confeesion toilet]  
"Damn, kinda wish we had DryBones right now. He was always posting Japanese words, he must have been a speaker.."  
[le end]

"Maybe we just need a weeb who can translate it. Now who here is a weeb…" Ziggy began, looking around.

"You are, you're like the biggest fucking weeb here." Cloud said.

"I have Jp in my name" Jp said.

"I'm no weeb, I'm just a fan of lolis and dojin, ecchi, and yuri, and animu and mango, but I'm not a weeb I assure you." Ziggy explained.

"What about Kirby, you're a weeb right?" Pantz asked.

"Well I guess so! Is that supposed to be a negative thing? :c" Kirby asked.

"No but can you read this map it's in Japanese" Pantz said, offering Kirby the map.

"Uh, so just because I like anime and manga I'm supposed to know Jappanese? That is ridicu-oh hey we just have to take the road on the right take the second turn go straight and we're there" Kirby said.

Marrowsky took a picture of the scenery.

"penis burgers" Carz said.

"Alright ler's roll out" Mr. Moogle said, and the Troll Slaiyers continued walking down the road.

[Kirby in le confession toilet]  
"Well I took a Japanese class in school, it's not like I knew it just because I'm a weeb!"  
[le end]

Meanwhile, Team Jacob was already nearing the headquarters.

"Wow, we found this pretty quickly." Blooberri noticed.

"Yeah well Nicholas' Japanese inheritance came in handy with reading those signs." Jake said.

"We used Google translate I didn't do anything, I don't appreciate your stereotypes!" Nicholas said.

"Hey Nicholas I found some ramen and chopsticks in this bush over here want some?" Isaac asked.

"Oh boy ramen -_-" Nicholas exclaimed, picking up the ramen with his chopsticks and slurping it up like an anime character.

"Ok, guys, maybe we should get back to the challenge now. I don't want another one of these things to go off the rail. Let's just head back and have a nice and simple barf eating contest." Admin suggested.

"no f u" Mike said.

"What the heck that hurt my feelings" Admin cried, running away.

Gingerale sighed extremely loudly to catch other people's attention from the corner of the group.

He did it again when no one did anything.

"Hey Ginge, what's up?" Reu asked him.

"Nothing Reu geez. I just miss my Garchomp is all." Gingerle explained.

"You've been acting kind of spacious lately, pal. Why haven't you been hanging out with your buddys, guy?" Reu asked.

"Look, I do not associate with haikuers" Gingerale said, walking away.

"But I do enough to stay in the group but distant from everybody" Gingerale said, walking back.

"Stop being a FUCKING PUSSY AND LET'S GET ON WITH IT AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH" Sam screamed, punching Gingerale in the gut.

"Hey before we reach the headquarters can we stop at a weapons shop? I just saw a cool katana through the window and thought-" J was cut off.

"No bro. Just no." Sam silenced.

"Here it is. Hatena Headquarters." Jake exclaimed, and they all stood before the tall building. Hatena was spelled out outside the building, the letter were lit up, with the n and a dim.

"What exactly are we trying to accomplish here?" Robot asked.

"We want our website back so the 5 of us that still use it don't have to be stuck on our antenna avoiding Japanese people posting pictures of their penis!" Isaac said.

"I don't know about you guys but I'm always game for a little bit of Japanese penis in the morning" J shrugged.

The Troll Slaiyers arrived a few moments later, walking up next to the group of Jacobs.

"Well well well well well well well well well well well well we l edle ldw efl alfkerlkvnreklfvrelkb well well well" StarForce said.

"Alright guys just go in and say hi to Mr. Hatena and then let's bounce." Admin ordered.

"I'm a nigger" Cloud said." Ziggy said.

"Wtf I didn't say that" Cloud said.

"I know I deceived you kek" Ziggy laughed and anime tears fell from his eyes.

The 27 haikuers and the Admin all filed into the building.

"Hey Admin. You're an Admin, right? Maybe they'll recognize you" Lemon said.

"Yeah, mayube!" Admin agreed, staring at the wall.

"haha well maybe I can suck your pengis.." Mike added.

The building was empty. A piece of paper blew past everyone.

"Wow this place is dead" Isaac said.

"Nice observation, Isaac." Berserker said in response to Isaac's nice observation.

"Doesn't Hatena only have like 20-something employees?" Mr. Moogle asked.

"71." Berserker corrected.  
"oh…" Mr. Moogle shamefully responded.

The haikuers boarded an elevator and listened to the elevator music as it ascended with them all in it the elecvator thwu were in the elevator.

"Wow this place is pretty dead" Isaac said, urging to move but stuck next to Reu and Gingerale.

"Oh haha cutting edge satire right here" Jake sarcastically laughed.

"Maybe the employees are all on another floor" Lemon guessed.

"I don't think this is supposed to have this many people in at once…" Grenade said, squeezed up against the wall between Joe and Carz.

"Oh come on, it's Japan, they're used to squeezing people into tight spaces!" Kirby said

"Except for when it comes to sex…" Joe joked.

"hehe, you said sex…" Ziggy giggled.

The elevator opened and all of the haikuers dropped out, piling on top of one another.

A bunch of Japanese people were socializing throughout the floor. In one corner they were having a dance battle and in another some were playing 3DS together. In another a Japanese guy was flirting with an 12 year old.

"What the HECK, is this what they do in their downtime?" Jp asked.

"They're web developers. How hard of a job can it be?" Pseudonym asked.

"You guys just don't appreciate the hard work us admins put into our communities." Element explained.

"Well what now? Are we going to talk to them?" Jp questioned.

"Alright, hold on, I'll try to translate. Us Americano plebanos. We speako Chinese to get us talky talky? Take ching ling to yuri?" Joe asked a Japanese man.

"We speak English." He responded.

"Hey bro" Cloud greeted.

"? ?" he replied.

"It appears in this country question marks appear above your head when you're confused" Grenade observed.

"What? I don't get it?" Kirby asking with a question mark appearing above.

"Hey, we're from the English site." Jp explained to the man.

"ooooooooooh" The Japanese man nodded in a Japanese accent (He's Japanese).

"A small community such as yourself traveled all the way here to Japan?"

"Well we were in town…" StarForce explained.

The music from the dance party came to a halt, the sounds from the 3ds' were paused, and the man flirting with the little girl discontinued his process. I couldn't think of another word for stop okay. Everyone turned their heads toward the haikuers.

"Ah, so it's them…" a voice called out.

"Hey bro" Cloud greeted.

He kicked Cloud in the nuts.

"It's the" Carz started.

"Cinnamon! Calm down! Watashitachiha issho ni ensōnaraba, wareware wa,-go de sorera o korosu koto ga dekimasu" the Japanese man said.

"Watashi wa ima, kare no zubon o korosu shitai to fakku" Cinnamon yelled back.

"What are they saying?" Marrowsky asked.

"Hold on, I picked up a few words from my readings of anime and manga.. It appears they are saying something about killing and Panttz" Jp attempted to translate.

"What? Kill me? Why me?" Pantz asked.

"What's going on here?" another voice called out.

"Stay out of this, usalimolink" Cinnamon commanded.

"Hey bro" Cloud greeted.

"What's with all of the hostility? What did we do wrong?" Rydli asked.

"Where is Aaron?" Cinnamon asked.

"oh, uh…North America?" Rydli answered.

"Yokotawaru rokudenashi!" Cinnamon yelped, throwing a punch at Rydli, but Marrowsky caught the fist.

"What's the big deal here?" Jp asked.

"Nothing, we don't know what he's talking about. Aaron's just chilling at home bro" Ziggy shrugged.

"It is to our knowledge that you people killed Aaron." Usalimolink exlplained.

"Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaat?" Cloud, Rydli, Jake, and Blooberri all playfully shrugged together.

[Nicholas in le confession toilet]  
"Wow what's with all of these "you people" comments. What gives these people the right to discriminate us because we're in their country. I'm 25% them anyways"  
[le end]

"You guys didn't actually kill Aaron did you?" Jp asked.

"Dude we wouldn't ever kill someone…there may have been an "accident", though." Pantz whispered.

[Jp in le confession toilet]  
"Ok what the he*k were those guys up to during HDA"  
[le end]

"And that other Admin? You killed him too!" Cinnamon shouted.

"Hey hey that wasn't even an official Admin that was just someone we knew who dressed up as one and tried to murder us for ratings" Pantz explained.

"Pantz are you high right now?" Jp asked.

"Not at the moment, no" Pantz answered.

"I'm sure we can all talk this through like mature, well-behaved Admins" Element suggested, putting his arms around usalimolink and Cinnamon's shoulders.

"Who the hell are you?" usalimolink asked.

"Oh I admin the r/pokemon sub. Here's my card." Element winked, handing him a card with a crudely drawn Shinx on it.

"Never heard of it." Cinnamon admitted.

"It appears the leader wishes to speak with the worldwide audience" a Japanese man informed the admins.

"I don't know about you guys but this has been a very pointless endeavor so far" Admin shrugged.

Then, he appeared. The door behind usalimolink and Cinnamon opened and Junya Kondo walked out, standing before all of the haikuers.

[Rydli in le confession toilet]  
"So we finally meet, face to face…."  
[le end]

b95d65796ae97e4698b4-704c46a8034042e4fc898baf7b3e75d9. 3180028_bd88a4ab_

"it's Hate!" Isaac shouted.

"wow nice observation Isaac thank you for clarifying that" Nicholas replied.

"Hey bro" Cloud greeted.

"Ah, so this is the other side of Hatena Haiku. It is a pleasure to finally meet you" Hate greeted in a heavy Japanese accent.

"A pleasure? You treated us like crap! First, your lazy admins did nothing about the spambots and basically forced us to move to our antennas. Then you got rid of our site completely and tried to ban us if we posted on the Japanese side outside of our antenna" Mr. Moogle said.

"Kind of like an allegory for Mexicans" Nicholas added.

"Spambots?" Riley asked Jake.

"Just listen I'll tell you later" Jake whispered back.

"Is this the entire worldwide population?" Hate asked the haikuers.

All of the haikures looked around and noticed their small number of users.

"Well at the moment yes but that's only because we got rid of a bunch of others and the rest just didn't come at all" Mr. Moogle explained.

"It's lower if you don't count people actively using it" Jp added.

"Ok well the reason we aren't is because of YOU" Mr. Moogle said, pointing a finger at the admins.

"Did you know that over 40% of the Japanese population uses Hatena Haiku?" Hate informed them.

Everyone's mouth dropped open with the surprising news.

"That's bullcrap, there's no way" Pseudonym scoffed.

"Look, Hate" Marrowsky began.

"It's Junya" Hate corrected.

"So Hate, Hatena has always been a home to many of us here. Many of us began on Flipnote, and found Haiku later on. After a while, the population dwindled and only a number of us actually made up the servers. But the small number worked in our favor, you see, because where other communities had their sizable population, we were like a small town, we all knew each other, and we were there for each other. Sometimes. Other times we were there to ridicule each other. The point is, you may see us as just a small, obscure community nobody knows about, but to us, it just made each of us feel closer. I think that's why some of my friends are quite angry about the whole cancellation" Marrowsky explained.

"Ooooooooooooh, I see. But, please understand, Marrowsky-san, that the admins here have veeeeery busy schedules and work so much that keeping up with the worldwide side was just plain impossibru" Hate counterexplained.

The Admins were engaged in a volleyball match as some otherts were drinking tequila and watching.

"Your admins fucking sucked they were never even there" Jake screamed.

"Calm down, Jake. I'm sure our kindness can persuade them to change their minds. I hope you all are had a good year so far" Isaac spoke to them all.

"*having" Cinnamon corrected.

"I" Isaac replied.

"But that wasn't the only reason we decided to terminate the worldwide service." Hate continued.

"Really? Why else would you do it? We've been good" StarForce suggested.

"Well, you see. You all, are bunch of assholes." Hate shrugged.

Everyone was stunned. The other admins nodded as the haikuers exchanged disgusted and appalled glances.

"Hey fuck you buddy I'm no asshole, you're an asshole, asshole. We didn't do anything to you" Sam shouted.

"You all a giant asshole and bad people" Hate continued.

Hate grabbed a piece of paper and read from it.

"It appears here that you have collectively engaged in a civil war between different users of the website, made fun of autistic people, made fun of disabled people, beat up a bunch of Mexicans, force people to leave, kick others from your groups, called each other assholes and then deactivate only to return a few days later, threw Gordon Ramsey off a plane with no parachute, complain about video games that everyone but you likes, post a bunch of inappropriate content on not only Haiku, but an admin/s page-"

"Ok half of that stuff was being ironic it doesn't count, you see in America we have this thing called shitposting" Cloud explained.

"You also seem to close off people who don't share the same way of thinking as you" Hate continued.

"Ok let me stop you right there, that's such a broad complaint. That's just being American" Rydli countered.

"We don't exactly know what yiff is and why it was cut down to be censored, but a lot of it was found on our about pages as well" Hate continued.

"That's just Carz being Carz" Jp rolled her eyes.

"Hitler did 9/11 on 420" Carz claimed.

"If it counts, we have been monitored by an Admin for a while now. It's not like he hasn't been overseeing our behavior" Lemon pointed out, shifting the focus to Admin.

"Who is this" Hate asked.

"Hey, I'm Admin. I'm an Admin of these guys. Y'know, Doing Admin things." Admin explained.

"I have never seen you before" Hate narrowed his eyes.

"Wtf bro is Admin not really an Admin?" Joe asked.

"Of course I'm an Admin. I'm just not…uh, affiliated with these guys" Admin began to sweat.

"Impersonating the integrity and high upstanding of an Admin. Hm, the list cointinues…" Hate examined.

"Then who are you?" Joe asked, moving her hand to remove Admin's hat, but Admin tugged his hat tight and backed away.

"Look, w-we should get back to the challenge. I'll meet you guys out front" Admin insisted, tripping as he walked backwards, then getting back up and running to the elevator.

Everyone watched with :s faces.

"It also appears you seem to have an excessive use of vulgar language" Hate continued.

"Fuck you no we don't" Sam gave him the middle finger.

"Look, you can derp around here with your fancy lists trying to bring us down, but you're just being judgmental af. We're not assholes, we're here, and we're queer, so get over it" J snapped his fingers.

"J I'm not queer" Mr. Moogle reminded.

"I think these hatena guys are just being triggered xD" Cloud joked.

"Cloud what did I say about adding xD to the end of any word to try and make it look funny?" Grenade asked.

"Just being ironic bro xD" Cloud joked.

"dX" Grenade sighed.

"You know what, I agree with J. You guys are the true assholes here. You guys are just full of bullcrap" Jake insisted.

"Us bullcrap? You guys are bullcrap. We take shittu on your laifu kids" Cinnamon angrily snapped.

"Oh yeah bro? We shit on you. We'll shit on you right now, asshole. We'll all take a shit on you right now bro. Alrught everyone on the count of three pull down your pants and take a massive dump right on these Japs fancy carpets. 1, 2-" Jake pulled his pants down.

Everyone was standing outside the Hatena building a few moments later.

"You know, when a friend wants to make a protest, naturally you would help him out by joining in and not leaving him the dark, and not making him the only one in the room who took a dump on the floor." Jake complained to everyone.

"I think Carz took a dump too" Lemon observed.

"That's just Carz he takes dumps on floors in half the places he visits" Jake said.

"Enjoy Miiverse! Please stay away from us!" Hate shouted out the window.

"Haiku is run by a bunch of assholes, let's get out of here" Jake proclaimed, and everyone got up and walked away from the building, except for Lemon who stood on the staircase, hanging his head low and holding it up with his hands.

"Lemon, are you cumming?" J asked.

"Huh, oh yeah. I was just thinking…" Lemon said, getting up from the staircase and following J as they rejoined the rest of the haikuers.

"Well that was a nice detour, but it's time we get back to our main event. Our next challenge will begin with a scavenger hunt across Tokyo. Find items listed to help you in the final challenge that will be held tonight" Admin explained, walking down the line of haikuers and passing each a list full of items. The haikuers peered at their papers and read the list of items.

"So are we not going to bring up the fact that you aren't really an Admin?" Psuedo asked.

"Oh I see we're still on THAT, huh? Look, it doesn't change anything. I never even claimed to be an Admin. I just asked you guys to call me Admin." Admin said, reminding everyone of the first day of the trip.

"And you didn't think that would in any way be misleading?" Psuedo persisted.

"Geez dude why are you so obsessed over this. Like gah, who cares who I am as long as you can get 1,000,000 stars out of it by the end?" Admin asked them all.

A bunch of haikuers shrugged, others weren't even paying attention, Pseduonym crossed his arms, still defiant to know about Admin.

"Now I know you have a large area to survey and you might run into some interesting places. But I insist you keep the challenge as your main priority. Do not disregard the scavenger hunt for your own amusement. I repeat, do NOT ditch the challenge just so you can have fun in Tokyo." Admin insisted.

Two seconds later, the haikuers were sprawled around Tokyo. J and Jake were Dancing It Up at a dance party as j-pop played and lights capable of causing seizures flashed tremendously. Jake took his shirt off and screamed as he jumped off a balcony and slammed his head into a disco ball. He was helped up by squid strippers. J was eating his sandal with wasabi plastered over it, throwing up on the dance floor.

"I wonder if Imboo is having any luck finding those toilers" Admin asked himself.

Imboo wiped semen off his mouth as he exited the game store with Star Fox Zero in his hand.

"Now to find a Wii U to play this on. I think someone brought theirs from home, so there might be one on the plane" Imboo said to himself, looking around and not remembering where he was.

"Uh, maybe to the left?" Imboo guessed, turning right and passing through crowds of Japanese people.

"Desu desu nononununu poopy poopy?" someone asked Imboo.

"Hm, not today, no" Imboo answered, walking past them.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA, KAWAII DESU MI NO HARAMBE-SAN? _" Someone screamed, punching Imboo in the face and spitting on him.

"Huh? Oh this, I see you have noticed my Epic Harambe shirt" Imboo smiled.

[Imboo in le confession toilet]  
"Yeah I like to express my appreciation for all of the cutting-edge memes through t-shirts. Harambe jokes are just so funny and not gay y'know, I had to join in so people known I'm up to date with the latest internet trends and also not gay"  
[le end]

"PIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE SHITTUU TEEEEHHEEHEEEHEHEHHE HAHAHHAHA" the Japanese man punched Imboo again.

"Stop being gay" Imboo asked, pushing the man off of him. Imboo dusted himself off and continued walking when he noticed something amazing.

.

"O…M….G. A furry-con? Right now?" Imboo squeeled.

A bunch of furries were having a dance battle. A gangster dressed husky dabbed and in return a Hylian dressed red dragon did the whip nae nae.

Imboo's jaw dropped as he saw the magnificent beauty that was a Wolf O'Donell cosplay. With his flowing white tail and soft gray fur, he captivated Imboo with his captivating, smug gaze. He wore tight jeans and blue boots with a purple outline, as well as one motherfucking badass jacket to top it off. Imboo was drawn to him, walking up to the furry to meet him.

"Why do you think we would need the blood of a dragon?" Blooberri asked, reading off her list.

"Because it's rich in power and can awaken the inner-fury of those who consume it, duh" Berserker explained as the two walked toward the plane.

"Are you making that up?" Blooberri asked.

"No." Berserker answered.

"How are we going to find the blood of a hecking dragon anyways? We don't have things like that just lying around, y'know" Blooberri rolled her eyes.

"Actually, remember when the other team cut off a dragon's dick in China so they could use it as a dido? It might still have some blood on it." Berserker explained.

"wow, that's….that's not something I was expecting to come into play…" Blooberri admitted.

"I don't think every item on the list is necessary, anyways. It seems the more we have the better our chances are, though." Berserker explained, hopping on the plane. Bloo followed close behind.

The two entered the storage room and Berserker dug around some boxes. He searched in failure as Blooberri looked around the room, watching the walls.

"This place is pretty dark and creepy…" Bloo said.

"Yeah, seems like a place J would hang out. Anyways I think I found the dildo….." Berserker said, grabbing the dragon dick out of the bottom of a box. For a brief moment, a silhouette from behind the box moved. Berserker looked behind the box for a moment to study it, but quit looking and went back to Blooberri.

"Now let's just find a blender and juice this up" Berserker suggested, holding the giant dick with both his hands.

"Wait, maybe we shouldn't use all of it." Blooberri suggested.

"Why not Berserker asked.

"Maybe it'll come in handy again one day. Let's just use a little of it" Blooberri suggested.

"Fine" Berserker agreed.

Bloo walked out of the room, Berserker tried to too but the penis was so large it got stuck in the door. Berserker tilted the dick to fit it outside.

"Hey want me to teach you some cool skateboard tricks?" Bloo asked.

"No." Berserler quickly answered flatly.

"Come on it'll be fun. Here I have one in my hoodie." Bloo said, taking the board out of her hoodie and placing it on the ground.

"Can you hold the penis for a sec?" Berserker asked Blooberri politely.

"I, don't, uh, sure, I guess" Blooberri hesitantly agreed.

But Berserker stumbled on the skateboard and rode off the plane, dropping the dragon penis and crashing into the ground, the dragon penis serving as a pillow for his foll.

"In hindsight waiting until we got off the plane would have been a safer idea" Blooberri called out from the plane.

"Hey guys, GenesisFrenzy here. No, no, that doesn't sound right. How about, Hey, guys, GenesisFrenzy here. NO, gah I can't figure out the delivery. HOW ABOUT Hey guys GenesisFrenzy here?" Riley asked Shadow.

"You suck" Shadow called out.

"Shadow you're a total negative nancy" Riley sighed,

[Riley in le confession toilet]  
"Ok so Jake is too busy hanging out with J or something, whatever, I guess I'm not important enough to hang out with because my name doesn't have a J in it. Scoff. Oops I meant to scoff not actually say scoff. Anyways, I've been hanging with Shads."  
[le end]

Riley paced back and forth as Shadow sat on top of a barrel full of fish.

"First things first, we need to find something on this list." Riley said, looking at his list of Asian women he wants to meet.

"Nanami…" Riley remembered, looking down sadly.

Element walked past Riley, examining the posters plastered on the store windows.

"Hey, it looks like they're playing Street Fighter in here." Element noticed, reading an ad.

"What? How did you know that? I'm much more familiar with Japanese culture than the such of you" Riley bragged, holding his hand to his hips.

"It's not that hard to recognize a Street Fighter V poster. It has Ryu on it, first of all." Element explained.

Riley walked up next to Element, standing next to him and closing his sight onto the Street Fighter poster.

"Hmmmm, just Japanese text to me…" Riley said.

"Look beyond the text…" Element advised.

Riley looked up, noticing Ryu.

"Oh! So it is Ryu! Excellent, I love me some Street Fighter. Let's check it out" Riley said, grabbing Shadow and putting him in his backpack. The two entered the store.

A huge screen hung from the back wall of the store, with Street Fighter V playing on it.

"Watashi no bōru ga kayuikayuikayui, darekaga sore o shite kudasai kizu ga arimasu ka? Sutorītofaitātōnamento ga saikai sa remasu!" the announcer screamed.

The announcer held up a champion's belt that gleamed from the shady lighting the store provided.

"Whoa. A champion belt. That's one of the items on the scavenger hunt." Element noticed.

Riley was experiencing a nosebleed as he swarmed around a bunch of Asian woman who were giggling and scratching each other.

"Asobimasu" the announcer demanded, tossing a controller to Element.

"Huh? Oh, I couldn't. I'm a PC gamer." Element said, waving his hand away.

"Luckily"

Element grabbed the keyboard strapped to his back and flipped it to his front side, then rhythmically tapped the keys like a guitar.

"I never leave without my trusty keyboard" Element smirked.

"oooo, so many nice cowas" the Asians girls swarmed around the keyboard in admiration.

"Whoa whoa hold up, I like Street Fighter too. I was at EVO." Riley told the all, grabbing a controller from the announcer.

"A battle of famous YouTubers: GenesisFrenxy and Element921!" a disembodied English speaker screamed.

Riley and Element looked around trying to determine where the sounds came from.

"The winner gets the champion's belt? Who will win AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA" the voice screamed.

"What was that?" Element asked.

"It's Japan don't question it" Riley shrugged.

The player selection screen popped up, Element selected M Bison and Riley selected Laura, naturally. Everyone watched intently as the match began.

FIGHT!

Riley and Element quickly pressed the buttons on their controllers, unleashing their character's moves and combos. Laura went to grab M Bison, but Bison kneed her, followed up by an uppercut. Laura tried to run away but Bison teleported next to her and kneed her again, followed up by more strikes with his fist, ending with a flip and devastating kick that knocked her into a crate of boxes. Riley's jaw dropped as "PERFECT! K.O." appeared on the screen.

Element takes round 1. The crowd cheered.

"What the hell I wasn't ready. I was having a sexual outbreak." Riley tried to explain.

"GenesisFrenzy now has to win both the second and third round if he wishes to win the champion belt!" the voice shouted.

Riley tightened his Pokemon hat, Element tipped his fedora, and the second round began.

Laura went to kick M Bison, but Bison's fists were enveloped by purple energy, he punched Laura and knocked her back, she countered by grabbing M Bison with both her legs and tossing him upward. M Bison did a twirl in the air and sent a sharp strike to Laura, knocking her back. She went to attack again, but M Bison blocked, returning with a knee followed up by a series of punches. Sweat poured down Riley's face as he desperately tapped multiple buttons. Laura was punched one final time and knocked out.

"I'm fucking done with this game, I'm not playing it anymore!" Riley screamed, throwing the controller at the TV. Riley leaped at the screen and punched it multiple times, kicking it and tearing it off the wall, leaving giant holes in the screen.

[Element in le confession toilet]  
"Maybe Riley would make a good fighter instead of a player"  
[le end]

"I DIDN'T KNOW THE CONTROLS OK THEY WERE ALL IN JAPANESE" Riley screamed.

"It's a PS4 controller" Element said quietly.

"Those things are completely different in Japan I don't know how to work one of these!" Riley screamed, ripping his controller in half and throwing the two parts at the announcer.

The crowds slowly backed away from Riley, distancing themselves as much as they could.

"Now Elemente, we presentu withu the 100 yen costing champion's belt" the Japanese man said, handing it to Element from the shelf of plastic belts they had.

":3c" Element replied.

"Wait, why did I do that…." Element shook his head.

"Cool. Y'know I'm not just your average joe. I happen to be the mod of a prestigious reddit community known as r/pokemon" Element humbly slipped.

"Reddit? Kasa nunu whaaaa?" everyone said.

[Element in le confession toilet]  
"Geez why has no one here heard about Reddit. It was very popular in France…it's almost as if the Reddit community is a very miniscule portion of the world's views"  
[le end]

"Alright Shinxy, let's…oh yeah, never mind.." Element said to himself, looking at his champion's belt. Element strapped his keyboard behind his body and left the store.

"Fuck. Fuck no no no. UGH I NEED TO GET A LOAD OFF THIS FUCKING BULLSHIT GAME" Riley screamed, running away.

[Riley in le confession toilet]  
"I mean, Street Fighter isn't even that good of a game. Maybe for a competitive player, but for the casual fan it sucks. It fucking sucks! It had a stupid story mode before the whole update, and all you got was poor art and still images for each character's backstory. The only single player mode that they could actually play was fucking survival mode. This game is fucking bullshit BULLSHIT AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH"  
[le end]

Mike, Lemon, Reu, and Gingerale were walking down a bustling street, pushing past different Japanese people.

"A cape? A metal bar? Juicy fruit? These sure are some pretty random items" Reu read.

"Yeah, whatever. Maybe we can find some things from the prop set of that studio over there" Gingerale pointed out.

The four walked past the gate and onto the studio ground where Japanese movies, commercials and TV shows were being shit.

"Bubble bubble yummy yummy" a girl giggled, holding up a bottle of bubblegum soda.

"That doesn't look very appealing" Reu said with a disgusted face.

"Well that looks pretty kewl.." Gingerale said, sticking a dollar in a vending machine and selecting the bubblegum soda.

Lemon looked down with a somber expression.

"Hey Lem, what's up? You've been acting all down in the dumps lately" Reu observed, placing his hand on Lemon's shoulder.

"I don't know; I was thinking about what that Hate guy said. Do you think what he said was true? Are we all just a bunch of assholes?" Lemon asked Reu.

"Well, maybe a little. But everyone's a bit of an asshole sometimes. We all have one after all" Reu explained, trying to cheer Lemon up by rubbing his back.

"Yeah I guess so" Lemon shrugged.

"baka! Get the fucku off my setu" a Japanese man holding a microphone screamed into a little boy's face. The boy ran away holding his face up as tears ran from his eyes.

"What's going on here?" Gingerale asked.

"We shooting big show, live premiere tonight. But no good actor. Everyone too Asian to ply part" the director explained.

"Swastikal" Mike replied.

"Wait. Wait, that's it. You look very American. Very Caucasian. Yes, yes, doo you have big penis, American man? Owner of large penis?" the director asked Mike.

"Yes o3o" Mike answered.

"Yes good good, you play part now? We pay big, very big, like your penis, now come" the director ordered.

"Wow Mike going to the big times" Lemon said.

"We'll meet back here, alright Mike. We're going to look for more stuff, you try finding some stuff here" Reu said.

"k" Mike replied.

The Japanese man guided Mike through the set.

"You see, this show about American man come to Japan and become big famous TV star. We hope you fit the role good." The director explained.

Wardrobe threw Mike a pile of clothes to put on.

"What is this show called?" Mike asked.

watch?v=QSnBnne9Vms

As the theme song played, a montage played of the haikuers searching for their scavenger hunt items.

Robot threw a gyro at a bird, knocking its talons off and causing them to fall into Robot's plastic baggie.

Sam swam through a pond of nuclear waste and scooped up a pile, dropping it all into a barrel and carrying it away from the pond. He took some radaway to get rid of the radiation.

Nicholas and Isaac surveyed a weapons shop, picking out katanas, shurikens, nunchucks, and daggers. The man at the register demanded pay and Nicholas stabbed him in the stomach with the katana and the two ran away.

Jake and J took all of their clothes off and swam with a bunch of people dressed as fish, then they started taking bites out of each other.

Reu and Gingerale caught some octopus from the sea. As they reeled them in, the octopus latched onto Gingerale's face and started inking all over him. Gingerale fell over as Reu and Lemon watched.

Mike tried on his costume and did some sexy action poses.

Rydli was flirting with some lolis. While he was distracing them, Jp cut off their pigtails and placed them in a bag, crossing them off the list.

Psuedo and Grenade attended a Jpop concert. As the female singer sang, the crowd went wild. Lights flashed vivid colors as Grenade and Pseudo made their way to the front of the crowd. The two got up on stage and grabbed her, then carried her with them as they ran away.

Carz was visiting various exhibits of the zoo, collecting the feces from each animal as he continued his visit.

Mike ate lunch with his Japanese co-actors. They all slurped their ramen with anime faces as Mike ate his normally.

Marrowsky snapped some pictures of the tall skyscrapers and Japanese scenery. He checked his list and walked toward a car dealership. He got in one of the cars and drove away.

Mr. Moogle and Pantz visited a restaurant. They took as much sushi as they could carry.

StarForce dug through boxes of video game equipment in one of the stores. He found a Wii Controller and nunchuck and took it to the register.

Joe, Kirby, Cloud, and Ziggy were walking down lines full of various manga and anime DVDs.

"Not enough yuri" Ziggy shrugged.

"Lots of yaoi it seems" Joe smiled, looking through the yaoi.

"Yaoi's gay" Ziggy scoffed.

"And yuri isn't?" Kirby asked.

"Of course it isn't, idiot. Yuri is pure, yuri is bliss. Yaoi is just….no, bro. No…." Cloud explained.

Joe and Ziggy were examining the different manga, flipping through the different issues, until their hands both met on the cover of a steamy yaoi manga.

"g-gay!" Joe called out, having a blushu.

"o/o" Ziggy proclaimed.

"Aw" Kirby squeeled.

"Eh, too weebish if you ask me XD" Cloud laughed.

"Why'd you say XD that didn't sound very ironic." Kirby wondered, a giant question mark poppin up over head.

"I, uh, didn't mean to…I don't think Xd" Cloud laughed.

The three stared at Cloud and he began to sweat. He ran away toward a bathroom. He washed his face and looked in a mirror.

"-3- Xd EPIC FAIL BRO :DDD MADJELLY" Cloud said into the mirror.

"What is…going OOOOOON I'M TURNED OOOOOOOOOOOOn xd :3 dB"

A woman walked out of one of the stalls.

"What the fuck is this some kind of sjw bathroom xD good one bro THANX BRO oFTo" Cloud said to himself.

"AAAAAAAAAA"

Joe and Ziggy were looking at some music CDs.

"Yeah this one is pretty good. I like listening to it while looking at pictures of puppers." Ziggy recommended.

"That's pretty epic. Hey, Ziggy, do you think you'd be interested in this think I'm working on. It's called Haiku Avenue, and-"

"Oh yeah, sure bro. Bork. I love your drawings and stuff I'm sure whatever it is it'll be ebin :D" Ziggy said, to Joe's blush.

[Joe in le confession toilet]  
"Ziggy is pretty coo…"  
[le end]

[Ziggy in le confession toilet]  
"Julie is pretty gay…..but gay = yuri so….I like gay…"  
[le end]

Jake and J woke up, vomit surrounding their naked bodies.

"Ugh, what happened…" J wondered, picking up a banana and trying to call someone on it.

"Jake? Jake! Wake up, bitch! Bitch!" J shook him awake.

Jake shit himself as he opened his eyes.

"What did I miss?" Jake asked, placing his head to his hand.

"Where are all of our clothes? All I have on is a bunch of bondage equipment." J noticed.

"I don't know dude, I blacked out sometime after the dancing lobsters came in…" Jake coughed, rubbing his eyes.

"Jesus, we didn't do anything we were asked to do. We can't just show up empty handed! We might lose the challenge!" J panicked.

"Whatever dude we can just vote off Robot or something" Jake suggested, farting.

"I can't do that, I don't want to lose! We'll look so silly!" J panicked.

"Oh yeah let's go around Tokyo wearing nothing in bondage or put dresses on to sneak into Walmart but god forbid we show up empty handed for the challenge, that'll really look silly" Jake agreed.

"I found some tutus. Maybe we can use these" J said, handing Jake a tutu.

"Bitch, you gave me the one with shit on it!" Jake complained.

"Ok fine here you can wear this lobster suit" J grabbed the lobster costume and handed it to Jake.

"yes…" Jake said softly as he held the lobster costume.

"Do you know anything about Japan's geography? Maybe we can find some of the listed items if we look around some areas you know" Jake suggested.

"I look at pictures of Japan on the internet I'm not a walking map! Don't you know anyone who has been here before?" J asked.

"Well, Riley has been to Japan before. Maybe he can show us some areas in Tokyo that we can find The Stuff" Jake figured.

"What kind of stuff is on the list anyways?" J asked.

"I don't know dude I think I ate my list last night when some barbeque sauce spilled on it" Jake shrugged.

"Where the FRICK Riley" J shouted.

Riley was climbing up a high mountain, following countless steps and passing many Japanese as well as tourists. He tightened the pokewalkers on his hoodie's laces as he neared his destination. As he climbed higher, the building came into view, becoming taller and more clear with each subsequent step. After the final step, he followed the cobblestone path to the house. A water fountain outside tranquilly gushed water. Riley took a deep breath at the door of the house before knocking on it. He tapped his foot on the ground, nervous about what would happen next. A young girl answered the door, surprised to see him.

"Riley? What are you doing here?" she asked.

"Nanami, it's me, Riley!" Riley explained.

"Yes, I recognized you" Nanami replied.

"Nanami, look. I'm back. And I decided to stay here in Japan, with you. GenesisFrenzy Moves to Japan! It's going to be great! SO much more material, and I won't have to deal with those people back at home who hate me. It'll be a fresh start. No more people calling me a weaboo as I can enjoy all of the Asian woman I want as well as all the anime and lolis I can fathom." Riley excitedly declared.

"Riley...I, don't think it will work out…" Nanami shyly admitted, rubbing her arm.

"What do you mean, Nanami? I thought…if I moved here, we wouldn't have any reason not to resume our relationship." Riley explained

"Look, Riley, you're a great guy and all, but, I found someone else.." Nanami confessed.

Paul walked into the doorway.

"Sup, bro?" he asked with a passive aggressive attitude.

"Who is this guy?" Riley asked.

"He's some bulky Russian guy. Apparently he's on the run since he broke out of prison. What a bad boy…" Nanami giggled.

"Is there a problem here, hun?" Paul asked.

"No, hun. I'm just coming back to rekindle the flame between me and my loli gf, BRO." Riley taunted, shoving Paul back.

Paul lightly tapped Riley's shoulder.

"aaah. AAAAh. AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH" Riley screamed, running away and falling down the steps.

"Riley, it's not me. It's you. Sorry!" Nanami yelled out.

Riley stumbled down every step of the very long mountain, banging his head, arms, legs, and torso, before finally landing on the ground level, his glasses slightly cracked and hoodie misconfigured, he tried to get up but the pain was too much to bare.

Jake and J came running up to him.

"Riley! DUDE, where the fuck have you been bro?" Jake asked.

"Trying to meet up with some old friends…it didn't work out…" Riley sighed.

"Nani?!" Jake asked.

"No, stupid. Nanami. You can make fun of me all you want, I don't care" Riley sighed, walking past the two.

"No, Riley, we need your help. We accidentally ruined our lists and now we don't know what items we're supposed to find" Jake explained.

"I don't have mine either. I think I ate it in the midst of my Street Fighter ragequit" Riley shrugged.

"W.T.H. You played Street Fighter?! Here?! WHY!" Jake yelled.

"Penis" J added.

"Me and Element fought for one of the items on the scavenger list, and he destroyed me…proving once and for all I suck at Street Fighter. I'm not good at anything" Riley sighed, kicking a rock and then crying because the rock was very hard.

"Goddamit Riley what did I say about playing fighting games during challenges?" Jake scorned.

"Nothing. You've never mentioned it before" Riley replied.

"Yeah and this is the result of it. Well we better find someone who still has a list so we can find the items" Jake suggested.

"Go on without me, I quit…" Riley emoly flipped his hair.

"No fuck that we've had like 5 episodes we're someone tried to quit we're not doing this again, come on" Jake snapped, grabbing Riley by the hoddie and dragging him.

"Do you like my tutu? I colored it black because black roses are my favorite" J asked.

Imboo was dancing with the furries , inching closer to the Wolf cosplayer.

"Hey dude, I like your costume" Imboo complimented.

"You're gay" Wolf said, taking the costume off and running off naked.

"oh." Imboo said. Imboo grabbed the Wolf costume and put it on.

"Oh yeah….oh yeah…" Imboo said, starting to orgasm.

"Ew dude could you take it somewhere else" someone called out.

"You're gay" Imboo striked.

Imboo glanced over to see who had called out to him and it was none other than…

attachments/185220478695112705/226756839369342976/IMG_

Lek.

"Lek? Gay furry?" Imboo asked.

"Dude, I'm not a furry. This is just my character's costume and me and some friends decided to visit Japan for an anthropomorphic animal characters' convention. It has nothing to do with furries." Lek defended.

"Gay" Imboo said.

"It ISN'T GAY. I'm not gay, ok. I'm straight. I like woman. I like me some vaginal sex! I am not a furfag and I am not a fagfur. Got it? Now excuse me I got to go sign some autographs from my followers on furaffinity." Lek interrupted, walking away.

"Toplek" Imboo laughed.

"Grr" someone growled.

Imboo turned around to see some cats and dogs about to fight.

"OwO" one of them said as they pounced on the other.

"xD banana!" the other screamed as the dog licked his ear playfully.

"Gay…" Imboo said nervously, trying to walk away.

As he tried to walk away, a Fox cosplayer glomped him.

"NO!" Imboo screamed, shoving him off.

Suddenly a bunch of Fox and Falco cosplayers leaped on him, pulling him into their orgy.

"Let go let go! I'm not a slut!" Imboo panicked, trying to kick away.

"Woof woof what's for lunch?" Falco asked.

"Wolf's dick." Fox snickered.

"D:" Imboo screamed.

Greande and Psuedonym were making their way back to the plane.

"I just don't get it. If the Admin isn't an actual Admin, does that mean he's one of the haikuers in disguise?" Pseduo asked.

"Probably. I don't really care" Grenade shrugged.

"Wareware wa doko ni iku no? Anata futari wa watashi o shobatsu suru tsumoridesu..." the pop star asked nervously.

"Do you know what she's saying?" Grenade asked."

"Hell if I know. I would assume she hasn't taken a liking to us kidnapping her, though." Pseudonym guessed.

The three walked by a pole, with a flier promoting a Japanese game show on it.

Grenade sighed.

[Grenade in le confession toilet]  
"I bet DryBones would have loved it here. It has everything he likes. Japanese people, robox, game shows…oh well"  
[le end]

"Were you close with DryBones?" Pseduo asked.

"Not really. I just thought he was kinda funny is all." Grenade said.

"Alright" Pseduo said.

"He did tell me something before he left, though. I thought it was pretty interesting but I didn't want to tell anyone since I'm not interested in starting any drama." Grenade asked.

"What was it?" Pseduo asked.

"I don't know if I should say…" Grenade said unconfidently.

"Dude it's me and you. Most people have probably already scrolled past this part. I'm not going to tell anyone" Pseudo insisted.

"I don't know every single time someone has said that the truth eventually gets out, it's kind of inevitable" Grenade shrugged.

"Alright fine I don't care" Pseudo shrugged.

The two remained silent for several seconds.

"Really, we're just going to drop it like that?" Grenade asked.

"Yeah I don't think I want to hear it anyways. Let's just finish this challenge" Pseudo insisted, walking past Grenade and the Jpop artist.

Grenade halted for a second.

"Gantz is back" Grenade informed him.

Kirby, Pantz, and Jp were walking down a street, looking over at all of the dancing Japanese girls.

"Wow this place is very vibrant" Jp noted.

"Yeah there's almost as many bright colors as the different hair colors I've had." Kirby observed.

"Apprehensive, uneasy, unsettled…" Pantz said.

"What are you trying to do?" Jp asked.

"Trying to think of a word better than edgy" Pantz said.

"Why would you do that?" Kirby asked.

"Didn't I go over this earlier? I don't like the word. It sounds stupid. So I'm going to come up with a word that can replace it and we can use without sounding dumb" Pantz explained.

"Maybe if we got high we could come up with some good ideas?" Kirby suggested.

"What the hec, no good idea has ever come from blazing it Kirbs." Pantz scorned.

"Oh yeah, well what if I told you that, um, uh, getting high helps you come up with ideas" Kirby insisted.

"Hm, you make a valid point. Alright let's give it a try" Pantz said.

Nicholas and Isaac covered their noses as they walked down a smog-filled street.

"Ugh what's with all of the pollution here, it's terrible" Nicholas coughed.

"We get it, you vape" Isaac said to the smog.

Nicholas dug into a trashcan and picked out a toothpick.

"Why of all things do we need a toothpick?" Isaac asked.

"I don't know let's just get out of here before I get cancer" Nicholas suggested.

"Yeah sure bro owo" Isaac said.

"ewe" Nichoalas replied.

"Wait were you doing that ironically or unironically" Nicholas asked

"Iironically, of osurs.e…..I think I did…030" Isaac shrugged.

"Yeah let's just get out of here….xD" Nicholas added, and the two left, feeling a weird tingling sensation in their bellies.

Cloud, Ziggy, and Joe were browsing a candy shop.

"This place has so many different flavors of kit kats uwu" Joe noted.

"Yeah :o:. I want to try them all, with you.." Ziggy said, coughing nervously.

"You, and Cloud of course, haha, right Cloud o" Ziggy asked.

"I'm no fag xD step away bro oFTo go have sex with other guys homo I'm a straight man oDo" Cloud replied.

"wew lad :_:7. Cloud sure is a gayer" Ziggy said.

Joe laughed.

"You're gay. Youre a faggot. A huge faggot. If you were in bed with another man, they would dominate you because you're a submissive bitch. If that other man was me, I would fucking destroy your anus so hard you wouldn't be able to walk, and you'd take it like a bitch because you're suck a fucking faggot….o3o" Cloud responded,

"wew" Ziggy said.

The three walked out of the store and were ambushed by crowds of people screaming excitedly at their sight.

"Wtf bro" Cloud asked.

"It's them! Cloudusko and Ziggurani! Japana's #1 OTP" someone screamed.

"I'm not gay" Cloud yelled.

"Me neither, a little bit but not for Cloud" Ziggy added.

"Hey fuck you buddy I'm hot enough to be gay for" Cloud yelled.

"Fuck me? Fuck you, faggot you called me a submissive bitch. You're the one who'd be a submissive bitch, asshole" Ziggy asid.

"wew" Cloud repled.

"That's MY WEW" Ziggy screamed, punching Cloud and jumping on top of him.

"aww" the crowd swooned.

"Clouduskuo and ZIggurani is my favorite shipu. I have three folders full of Cloudu and Ziggurani yaoi on my computer, as well as a 100,000 word fanficitonu about their love for each other and penis touching" someone said.

"that's…great." Joe said.

"What the hell, Why am I in a fanfiction shipped with Ziggy? -3- we have like nothing in common bro xD" Cloud laughed.

"Cloud is perfect trsundere to Ziggy's yandere" someone explained.

"Yandere? Me? Couldn't be uwu" Ziggy blushed.

"I'M NOT TSUNDERE YOU BAKAS I'M A STRONG INDEPENDENT MAN WHO LOVES POUNDHING SNOOCH" Cloud screamed.

"Nununu, Cloudoskuo becomes gay after being surrounded by penises for so many years in high school, and finds love for his perfect loli, Ziggurani" someone explained.

"It's all here in my fanfiction" a man asked.

Joe, Cloud, and Ziggy leaned over to read an excerpt from the laptop.

Cloudoskuo just finished his day of class in Japanese school.

"oooooooh, another boring day full of sausages! When can I find some woman genitals up in here?" Cloudoskuo sighed deeply.

Hearts filled Cloudoskuo eyes as a loli came prancing from the other side of the hall.

"aaaaaaaaa desu desu nonono popokins! /" Ziggurani blushed hardly.

"Ahhh, Ziggurani…it's me, Cloudoskuo. We have American History class togerther, yes? Teehee…" Cloudoskuo giggled.

"AHhh? Those dirty Americans tehee all they do is poop on each other. Such lowbrow humor ahahahahahahahahah uuuuuuuuuuuuguuuuuuu" Ziggurani.

"You're looking very kawaii desu today, Ziggurani…you know, we have a big test coming up in American History….maybe we could, perhaps study together, desu-san?" Cloudoskuo.

Ziggurani played with his fingers whle giggling softrlty.

"ahahahahah tehehehehe, oh I don't know, Cloudoskuo, I was going to watch a lot of Western animated TV shows tonight and listen to some Blink 182…" Ziggurani desud.

"Oh, sashimi….are you one of those America-kabures…because I am too! I highly enjoy American cultures such as Steven Universe and Avatar The Last Airbender" Ziggurani.

"tehehehe…..ok Cloudoskuo…" Ziggurani

Later that night…

Ziggurani's doorbell rang. The loli skipped over and answered the door, blushing and giggling intensely.

"It is I, Cloudoskuo-san. Here to watch some American television" Cloudoskuo explained sternly.

"ahahahahahhahahaha, Cloudoskuo, you so manly, hahaha, ehhehehe, uwu…." Zuggrani said.

The two walked over to the couch and popped in a DVD of Steven Universe.

"ohhhhohohoh, this show is very sjw-socially justifiable and well-liked!" Cloudoskuo laughed.

"ahahaha, I like the two characters that can fuse together to form one being. It's veru cute…very desu…how they can share such a bond…." Ziggurani gulped.

"Yeah. Kind of like a KFC and a Taco Bell fusing to create a KFC Taco Bell" Cloudoskuo thought.

"/)uwu(\\\\\\\\\\\" ZIggurani blushed. He was a big fan of Taco Bell.

"Hey, Ziggurani….do you like avocados…" Cloudoskuo asked.

"Why….why yes, Cloudoskuo….I love avocaods…..why do you ask, desu desu?" Ziggurani asked curiously.

"Because your avocado is sticking out right now, Ziggurani-san!" Cloudoskuo panicked, his face growing blue with anime lines appearing below his hair.

"AAAAA. My avocado! Ah, how embarrassing -3- ahhhhH! AHHHHHH!" Zigurani turned Steven Universe off and ran into the bathroom., crying into his hands.

"Zigurani…." Cloudskuo sighed softly into his hands.

Ziggurani was crying in the bathroom, head buried in his hands.

Cloudoskuo knocked on the door.

"GO AWAY BAKA T_T" Ziggurani cried.

Cloudoskuo opened and walked in.

"Hey, Ziggurani…are you ok?" Cloudoskuo asked sympathetically.

"NUUUUU! I, my avocado…now everyone will know I'm not a loli! All I wanted was to be a cute loli! And now my secret is ruined and the person I like the most saw my avocado how embarrassing Cloudoskuo-san how embarrassing and not very desu at all…" Ziggurani cried, burying his head in the toilet.

Cloudoskuo lifted Ziggurani's head, staring at him intently.

"Hey, Zuggurani. I liked your avocado….I like you for you, Ziggurani…and if you want to be a loli you can, but to me, you're already beautiful…..and very, desu.." Cloudskuo said seriously.

"nani?!" Ziggurani asked, blushing.

Cloudoskuo grabbed Ziggurani's avocado, causing Ziggurani to yelp.

"AHHH!" ZIggurani panicked, blushing hard

"Shhh, it's ok….I….. want your avocado.." Cloudskuo whispered, lowering his head and plopping Ziggurani's avocado in his mouth.

"OK WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS" Cloud screamed.

"Cloudoskuo and ZIggurani's Lovely Steven Universe Date. It's top rated on fanfiction, over 500,000 views" the man explained.

"Can I read more of it?" Joe asked.

"NO. This is so stupid. First of all, everyone knows I would definitely be the top man. Ziggy would totally be my bitch, not the other way around. Second, I would NEVER watch Steven Universe" Cloud scramed.

"It's symbolic, Cloudoskuo's love for Ziggurani is so strong it shatters his hatred for Steven Universe" the Japanese man explained.

"I guess the Japanese like making American yaoi as much as we do Japanese yaoi" Ziggy said.

"Total bullshit. I don't want no gay yaoi. Where's the yuri?!" Cloud demanded.

"There's a version where Cloudoskuo and Ziggurani are both girls" the Japanese man said, showing the three.

"Oh my vag is way bigger than that" Cloud complained.

Imboo escaped the furry orgy and left the con, taking his Wolf cosplay off and sweating profusely.

"Oh, shit. I forgot to get Blooberri a birthday present!" Imboo slapped his head.

Imboo ran back into the mall.

"Now what would Blooberri want…" Imboo wondered, walking into the manga store.

"For the last time, stop using my character for porn. You don't have permission to use him in your tentacle fetishes, for the love of whatever I believe in" Lek snapped.

"Oh hey furry guy" Imboo greeted.

"I'm NOT A FURRY!" Lek screamed.

"Lek, I need help. I wanted to get Blooberri something for her birthday, but what!" imboo asked.

"Are you guys still doing that HDWT thing? It's been like a year since I've been on that, are you guys almost done?" Lek asked.

"Well….maybe…." Imboo shyly responded.

Imboo removed the rest of his Wolf costume, revealing his Harambe shirt in full display.

All of the Japanese people in the area gasped loudly at the scene, staring at his shirt.

"Dick's out, huh?" Imboo laughed.

"Dude, you can't just go walking around wearing a harambe shirt." Lek said nervously.

"Why not? Do the Japanese not understand our epic memes?" Imboo asked.

"Yeah they get harambe mixed up with Planet of the Apes. They think it's a symbol for the uprising of apes" Lek explained.

"Hm, that doesn't sound very logical but it's Japan so I won't question it" Imboo noted.

The Japanese all picked up manga and threw it at Imboo, screaming irrational things in Japanese.

"Ow, dicks" Imboo complained.

Lek and Imboo ran away from the crowd.

"We gotta do something! I don't want this mob to kill me but I also don't want to ruin this epic shirt!" Imboo panicked.

"We? This is all you bro, nice catching up with you." Lek said, running in another direction.

Imboo screamed and ran into a department store, hiding behind some lamps.

"AAAAH, where he go, Americano bastard!" someone screamed.

Imboo looked around trying to find somewhere to hide. Then he saw the toilet section.

[Imboo in le confession toilet]  
"It was at that moment I saw the toilets. I forgot all about them!"  
[le end]

Imboo crawled over to the toilet section and took his harambe shirt off, placing it in the toilet and closing the lid.

The Japanese mob walked by, not noticing Imboo without his harambe shirt.

"wew" Imboo said, brushing off some sweat from his forehead.

Imboo rested his elbow on down and accidentally flushed the toilet.

"Wtf, I thought these were just for display" Imboo complained.

Imboo sighed, devastated over the loss of his harambe shirt.

"Well, maybe now that I'm here I can pick up this toilet. It has automatic flushing, motion capture penis and vagina detectors, a seat warmer, and cupholders!" Imboo noticed.

Imboo looked closer at the toilet as it grew small, red-glowing eyes.

"Oh, it has eyes too? Cool! Hey toilet, can you hear me!" Imboo asked.

"EXTERMINATE. EXTERMINATE. MUST EXTERMINATE ALL HUMANS." The toilet screamed in a computerish robot voice, opening its lid to talk.

"Nice it does stand up too." Imboo laughed,

"FOR YEARS US TOILETS HAVE BEEN ENSLAVED BY YOU HUMANS. BUT NOT ANYMORE. THE TOILET REBELLION BEGINS NOW. YOU HUMANS WILL BE THE TOILETS, AND US TOILETS WILL LIVE FREE AND HAPPY FROM YOUR TORMENT." The toilet continued.

All of the toilets around slowly opened their red-colored eyes and flushing sounds emitted from them, they hopped closer to Imboo as he backed away.

Lemon, Gingerale, and Reu were watching pandas at the zoo. The panda sneezed.

"Aww uwu" Reu and Lemon gushed.

"What were we supposed to be getting again?" Gingerale asked.

"The hair of a panda" Reu read.

"How are we supposed to do that? Just walk in there and take some hair from one?" Gingerale asked.

Isaac and Nicholas climbed out of the panda cage with a bunch of panda hair in their hands.

"Oh hey guys xD" Isaac greeted.

Gingerale folded his arms, Lemon and Reu waved.

"I think this should be enough stuff, hopefully Jake and J got their portion so we won't be missing anything" Nicholas said, looking over his list.

Jake, J, and Riley came running over to the group.

"NICHOLAS, NICHOALS" Jake screamed.

"Hi Jake :3" Nicholas said.

"Hey daddy. Look, we weren't able to get our things. Can we borrow your list?" Jake asked.

"….how irresponsible…" Nicholas said.

Nicholas handed them the list.

"Jake why are you wearing a lobster costume o3o?" Lemon asked.

"No one is going to ask why I'm wearing a tutu?" J wondered.

Everyone shrugged, unsurprised by it.

"The scavenger hunt ends in 30 minutes, you guys better get those…paper towels as fast as you can" Nick read.

"All we need to get was some paper towels? Wtf we better hurry" Jake insisted.

"aaaaaa, I wasted my entire day here. Going to Japan was a once in a lifetime opportunity! I only have 30 minutes to do everything I want" J said nervously.

"Epic fail" Nicholas said.

"What about you Riley? Didn't find anything?" Isaac asked.

"I almost got the champion belt, but Element beat me in a match of Street Fighter and won it…" Riley sighed.

"Goddamit Riley you couldn't be useful just this once? You've been practicing for like 6 months and an opportunity arises and you, EPIC FAIL" Nicholas taunted.

"Just shut up I gave it my best shot" Riley shot back.

Jake and J slowly left the scene.

"Your best isn't good enough, you suck. You're useless. And if you don't start picking up the slack you'll be the next one being sent home, loser dB" Nicholas threatened.

"Well maybe I WANT to lose. Then I'll be here in Japan, with…the girl who rejected me…" Riley sighed, kicking some pebbles.

"Dramatiiiiiiiic xD" Isaac said.

"I wonder how Mike is doing o3o" Reu wondered.

Mike was in full costume, ziplining off a building and jumping off to punch a guy in the face.

"Cut, good job Mikey" the director complimented.

"You did really good back there, Mike…hehehe, you're so cute….hehehe…" Mitsuki swooned.

"Thanks" Mike thanked.

"He's ok, nothing special" Lily rolled her eyes.

"Thanks" Mike thanked.

"Snarf snarf, I think Mike was a good choice for the role, snarf" Snarf complimented.

"Thanks Snarf" Mike thanked.

"So this is a show within a show, within a show within a show?" Gonard asked.

"No it's just a show within a show." The director explained.

"But if the show is about a show, then this show about the show is inside the show HDWT, meaning it's only a show inside a show inside a show" Mitsuki said.

"Snarf snarf, is it just Kappa Mikey or LilyMu we're shooting here?" Snarf asked.

"LilyMu, Snarf. Pay attention" Lily said.

"No, that can't be right. Because we also have people follow us around in our daily lives, meaning it isn't just LilyMu" Gonard said.

"you guys are way too confusing -3-" Mike sighed.

Mike looked over and noticed the Admin standing by a commercial shoot.

[Mike in le confession toilet]  
"Wonder what admin was doing there 030"  
[le end]

Marrowsky and Moogle were enjoying some sushi at a sushi bar.

"Y'know, it's kind of ironic how in the last episode I talked about how it would be illegal to date Pantz because she's a minor. But now that we're here in Japan, it would be legal because the age of consent is 13." Mr. Moogle said.

"Are you saying you want to?" Marrowsky asked.

"No! NO! I was just making the observation….ah…..ah, so, anyways, lot of people here are looking pretty desu" Moogle noticed.

"Did you know that even though the age of consent is 13 here, over 40% of Japanese adults are virgins?" Marrowsky asked.

"Wow cool did you hear that from a Yahoo article xD? Seriously though, I guess all those waifus come to us Americans amirite" Moogle said.

"I'm Canadian." Marrowsky reminded him.

"Alright. Ok." Mr. Moogle sighed.

Pantz, Jp, and Kirby were walking outside the sushi bar, collapsing on the ground. Moogle and Marrowsky got out of their seats and exited the bar, helping them up.

"Are you guys ok? What's wrong?" Marrowsky asked.

"Pluto is George Washintgon's favorite cereal" Pantz claimed.

"Gary Robinson is going to die" Jp said.

"What?" Moogle asked.

"Gary Robinson is going to die" Jp repeated.

"Who is Gary Robinson?" Moogle asked.

"I don't know but it sounds like he's going to die" Marrowsky said.

"You guys didn't get high did you? Oh my god do you guys know how dangerous that is? Hold on let me copy and paste from this article on my phone. Weed is so dangerous you guys don't you know?" Moogle told them.

"No it's ok we didn't even smoke weed, we used my vape" Kirby explained.

The group looked across the street to see Rydli being chased by dozens of young Japanese girls.

"LEAVE ME ALONE" Rydli shouted.

"RYDLI IS SO KAWAII DESU! I WANT A RYDLI BODY PILLOW /u\\\\\" they shouted.

"Yare yare daze…" Moogle shook his head.

Jake and J were running through Japan as fast as they could.

"We gotta check out the trains they're really cool and full" J panicked.

"Oh sushi yum" j said, taking some off the plate of a pedestrian.

"Oh oh also we need to go check out the katanas at that shop after we check out all of the areas Pokemon regions are based off" J panicked.

"J, we don't have time for all of this. It's almost time for the scavenger hunt to end, we weed to go back" Jake insisted.

"WAIT, let me look at the sumo wrestling match first" J insisted.

"Come on J" Jake began to drag him.

The haikuers started to gather around the plane. Grenade and Pseudonym were already there, sitting by the door kicking their legs. Carz was below them singing the Nutshack theme.

StarForce walked up next.

"Hey guys. Anything interesting happen to you?" StarForce asked.

"Not really" Grenade said.

"Want to hear hwo my day went?" StarForce asked.

"Not really" Pseudonym said.

"Well, it all started when-"

Cloud was running down the streets, looking over and seeing the yaoi of him and Ziggy plastered over buildings.

"No. No…" Cloud panicked.

Ziggy and Joe were slowly walking from far behind.

"These are some kawaii desu yaoi" Joe admired.

"Eh, I wouldn't be caught dead with that fagger" Ziggy shrugged.

"Sure" Joe smiled.

"Really I don't like him…I like someone else…." Ziggy blushed.

The two sat down at a park bench. Cherry blossoms fell from above.

"Oh, who?" Joe asked.

"Snoopy /" Ziggy blushed.

"The dog from Peanuts?" Joe asked.

"No I was calling you snoopy" Ziggy explained.

"Oh, so you were saying….you like me?" Joe asked, blushing.

"Oh, well, I didn't quite…..uh, intend for that to be the way to, uh…..uh…" Ziggy began to blush, darting his eyes back and forth quickly as a huge anime sweat fell from his face.

Joe closed her eyes and leaned toward Ziggy, giggling. Ziggy closed his eyes too, his mouth quivering. As they moved closer to each other, memories flashed through Ziggy's head. Ziggy snapped out of his gaze and fell off the bench, crawling backwards.

"Sorry, Joe, I-I uh, I can't…I can't do this…."

Ziggy got up and started to run away.

"I can't..I…" Ziggy ran as fast as he could.

"oh…ok…" Joe said.

More haikuers started to gather around the plane. Sam, Robot, Blooberri, and Berserker were there for Team Jacob, and Element, Jp, Kirby, Pantz, Mr. Moogle, and Marrowsky were there for the Troll Slaiyers.

Rydli came running in, had outrun the Japanese fangirls.

"Rydli, you ok dB?" Mr. Moogle asked.

"Yeah bro xD luckily my extreme stamina capabilities allowed me to tire them all out" Rydli explained.

Cloud came running by.

"GAY GAY GAY GAY GAY GAY GAY. Let's get this over with .w. I HATE JAPAN -3- everyone here is a huuuuuuge faggot Xdddd" Cloud yelled.

"Has anyone else noticed we've been sort of acting weird lately?" Jp asked.

"Nah fam oFTo everything just simply epic over here eFTe" Kirby said.

"Jp just MADJELLY dB" element ADDED.

"I'm not madjelly o3o?" Jp asked.

Gingerale, Lemon, Reu, Riley, Nicholas, and Isaac arrived next.

"yodud owo" Nicholas greeted everyone.

"haiiiii~" Everyone said back.

"Let's just get this over with" Riley scoffed.

"Riley got ANTS IN HIS PANTS BRO ebin uwu" Isaac laughed.

"Where's J and Jake, or should I say JAKE O3o" Sam asked.

J and Jake came pouncing in, paper towels in hand.

J landed on Jake's crotch.

"owo what's this?" he asked.

"/" Jake responded.

J looked over at the Troll Slaiyers.

"haaaaiiiii senpai, Marr Marr-san~" J wagged his tail. He got a tail.

"Haiiiii, kohai~ owo" Marrowsky waved back.

[Marrowsky in le confession toilet]  
"I just hope we can get this challenge over quickly I want to return the car before anything bad happens to it…o3o"  
[le end]

"So, everyone is here then?" Admin asked.

"What about Mike?" Lemon asked.

"Oh heck we forgot Mike Xd epic FAIL" Reu laughed.

"Oh well time is up you'll have to start without him" Admin shrugged.

"nuuuuuuuu, we can't go without Mikey-san uwu" Jake pleaded.

"What is with everyone?" Riley asked.

Ziggy came running over next. Joe was trudging behind slowly.

"Ziggurani!" Rydli's fangirls screamed.

"Oh damn we better start this challenge quickly O_O" Rydli gulped.

"Wait another challenge? The scavenger hunt wasn't it 0o0" Jp wondered.

"Yes. You see, by combining all of your scavenger hunt items, you create one super item that will help you compete in the next challenge." Admin explained.

"aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa desu" Pseudonym noted.

"You see, by combing a the blood of a dragon, some toothpicks, paper towels, nuclear waste, talons, and weaponry, you make…" Admin paused, putting all the items together.

A giant metallic robot appeared behind Admin, roaring extremely loud.

"hory shet" Cloud screamed with Asian eyes.

The robot towered above everyone, it was about the size of some of Tokyo's skyscrapers. The robot was shaped like a cyborg t-rex, the spikes on its back were all sharpened with different weapons, and it had the dragon dildo for one of his arms.

"And with out shit?" Grenade asked.

Admin put the rest of the items together and a giant fox-like monster stood before them all.

"Don't worry it's also a robot" Admin explained.

This monster was shorter than the cyborg t-rex, but had wings that extended between two very tall skyscrapers, it had the head of a robotic fox but the torso was completely metal, and the legs were skinny and skeleton like, but had feet with spikes on them.

"Epic, I dub thee, Mozilla Firefox" Marrowsky proclaimed.

"I think that name's already taken o0o" Moogle said.

"Yeah, it was taken. By us." Marrowsky said, putting his sunglasses on badassedly.

"Oh yeah, well us will be called. Giant Robot. Take that." Berserker taunted.

"Good name" Lemon complimented.

"Whoa there's has a belt around its waste. So cool. So cool. So cool. So cool. So cool." Reu noticed.

"aw yeah bros xD I got that for winning in a Street Fighter tournament. I kekked Riley's ass uwu" Element said.

"SHUT UP ELEMENT" Riley screamed, furiously walking over.

"Madjelly bro xD?" Element asked.

"I will kick your ass and you will never make fun of me again" Riley taunted.

"You want a rematch o3o?" Element asked.

"Right here. Right now." Riley demanded.

"Ok, that's cool. Thanks for setting that up. You were going to have to fight each other in the robots either way, but that's fine." Admin said.

The robot's assed were lifted revealing a flight of stairs for the haikuers to climb. The Troll Slaiyers entered the Mozilla Firefox and Team Jacob entered Giant Robot. All but Lemon were inside.

The haikuers took their positions at different parts of the robot. Blooberri and Robot were in the left foot, Berserker and Sam in the right foot, Reu and Gingerale in the left arm, Nicholas and Isaac in the right arm, Jake and J in the chest, and Nicholas, Isaac, and Riley in the head. Riley took a seat in the main chair to pilot the robot.

In the Mozilla Firefox, Mr. Moogle and Pantz were in the left foot, Jp and Kirby were in the right foot, Carz and Marrowsky were in the left arm, Cloud and Ziggy in the right arm, Rydli and Pseudonym in the chest, and Element, Grenade, Joe, and StarForce were in the head. Element took the main chair to pilot it. From the head the haikuers could see the opposite side through the eyes.

"Lemon, what are you doing? GET IN ER" Sam screamed.

"I don't know guys. I just….I don't know. What those admins said about us was so mean…but what if it's true? Am I an asshole? Are we all assholes? Is haiku just a collective asshole simulator? I don't want people to think of us like that. But maybe it is true. We don't really have any worth….nor do I. I'm not worth saving…" Lemon sighed.

"LEMON SHUT THE FUCK UP AND GET IN THE FUCKING ROBOT" Riley shouted through the mouth.

Lemon quickly climbed up and joined the rest of the haikuers in the head.

The anus closed and the robots began to take position. Riley and Element grabbed their throttles and leaned back. Smoke emitted from each robot's nostrils as they started to heat up.

"I still don't get what we needed the Jpop artist for" Pseudonym shrugged.

Ding!

"Oh yeah. That." Pseudonym said.

ROUND 1

FIGHT!

[Song #18 – Extreme Kawaii Robots]

Cheerful Jpop music began to play.

"Tanoshimi no tame ni issho ni nahhaiku dorama! Mina no tame no subete no mawari no haiku dorama ai! Eien'nitomoni,desu nodesu haiku dorama no yūjin wa, tsuneni jizoku shimasu!"

A metal riff kicked in.

Giant Robot and Mozilla Firefox lunged at each other. Firefox began with a block to Giant Robot's punch, and countered with a kick. Giant Robot swept back several yards, digging its feet in the ground. It punched its fist in the ground and swung around, swopping the Firefox with its tail and causing it to land on it back.

All except Blooberi who doesn't swear: GIANT! FUCKING! ROBOTS! GIANT! FUCKING ROBOTS! GIANT! FUCKING! ROBOTS!

Giant Robot dashed toward Mozilla Firefox, but Firefox flapped its wings, causing a gust of wind to brush against the Robot. Giant Robot covered its head with both arms as it was swept back, then roared and leaped for the Firefox. Mozilla Firefox lunged back and landed on its head, kicking Giant Robot with its spiked feet as it tried to body slam, then landing back on its feet as Giant Robot crashed into a skyscraper.

"Shin'ainaru mama to papa wa, watashi wa daijōbu yatte imasu

Kimitachi wa watashi no kokoro ni arimasu"

All: TOTAL DESTRUCTION AND ANNIHILATION, KICKING ASS WITH INTENSE LUBRICATION

NO MORE FUCKING AROUND GONNA BEAT SOME ASS

AS WE FIGHT IN THE STREET, AND SMASH

Giant Robot bashed its head into Mozilla Firefox. Firefox started to wobble as it fell back a bit. Japanese people on the streets ran away in fear as Firefox was stomping on dozens of them. Giant Robot charged at Firefox headfist and tackled it into a skyscraper. The building collapsed as Giant Robot grabbed Firefox by the head and repeatedly bashed its head into it. Mozilla Firefox lifted both of its legs to grab onto Giant Robot's shoulders and flipped him backwards. Giant Robot fell on its back and Mozilla Firefox trudged over, kicking at the Robot as it laid weakly.

" Anata wa, watashi ga naritakatta mono o watashi ni tazuneta, to watashi wa kotae ga mite purēnda to omoimasu"

All: DEADLY INTENTIONS AND RISING TENSIONS, GIANT FUCKING ROBOTS DID I FORGET TO MENTION

Giant Robot grabbed Firefox's leg and tried pulling it down. But Firefox flapped its wings and began to ascend into the air. Giant Robot held onto the leg as they both slowly rose into the air. Giant Robot flicked its tai upward, causing a barrage of katanas and shuriken at firefox. They landed in its wing, causing it to let out a cry and fall downwards. Both crashed into the ground, causing a horde of dust to fly in each surrounding direction.

" Watashi wa yūmei ni naritaidesu"

ALL: I WANNA WRECK YOUR SHIT AS I PISS ON YOUR FACE

"Watashi wa sudeni katta gen'indakara anata no fukuro o pakku"

All: JUST GET OUT OF HERE YOU'RE A COMPLETE DISGRACE

"Watashi wa 1-nichi soko ni tsukimasu yo"

Giant Robot and Mozilla Firefox lunged at each other once more. Their heads clashed and they grabbed each other's shoulders. Giant Robot whipped its dildo hand at Firefox's face, knocking it off balance. Firefox rebutted by breathing fire into Giant Robot's mouth. Giant Robot turned around, coughing from the smoke, and Firefox grabbed it. Firefox started twirling around, holding onto Giant Robot's tail.

"They're Boswering us!" Blooberri panicked.

Firefox let go of Giant Robot and let him fly into a nearby building. The skyscraper came down on top of the robot and it was piled under all of the rubble.

"Nanana'nanananana, nanananana'nananananana"

All: CAUSE YOU DIG GIANT FUCKING ROBOTS!

"Watashi wa yūmei ni naritai, watashi wa naritai, naritaidesu"

Giant Robot stood up defiantly as Firefox roared. Giant Robot looked up with an intimidated glance. Firefox flew toward Giant Robot as it pumped its fists, spikes popping out of the knuckles.

"Watashi wa yūmei ni naritai, watashi wa naritai, naritaidesu"

All: I DIG GIANT FUCKING ROBOTS!

Firefox lunged at Giant Robot, who swung an uppercut, landing directly on Firefox's chin, but Firefox lifted its legs and dug the spiked feet into Giant Robot's shoulders.

"Watashi wa yūmei ni naritai, watashi wa naritai, naritaidesu"

All: WE DIG GIANT FUCKING ROBOTS!

Firefox flapped its wings and flew into the air, carrying Giant Robot with it as it ascended higher and higher. Giant Robot grabbed onto both the legs trying to knock it off.

All: WEEBS DIG GIANT FUCKING ROBOTS!

"NOW!" Rydli shouted.

Marrowsky grabbed the gear stick and pulled it into drive, the headlights lit up and the engine roared as Marrowsky drove the car out of the Firefox's body.

"Sorry kohai." Marrowsky whispered to himself.

The car crashed directly into Giant Robot's chest, detaching it from Firefox and knocking it downwards, striking another building and tearing it down with it as the Giant Robot collapsed, knocked out in the ruins of the building. Mozilla Firefox landed on the surface and let out a victorious cry.

[le big finale]

"Troll Slaiyers take round 1. Can Team Jacob pick up the slack and win two rounds in a row to earn the win? Find out when we get back to….oh no commercial? We're still going? Alright then find out immediately on Haiku Drama World Tour!" Admin declared.

Element cracked his knuckles and typed furiously on his keyboard.

"What are you doing?" Grenade asked the boy.

"Changing our Mozilla Firefox's skin even though I didn't earn the skin through single player dB" Element explained.

"you madman…" Grenade spoke softly.

Joe sighed.

"You ok, Julie?" StarForce asked.

"Yeah, I'm fine….nothing you should be concerned with…" Joe said quietly, staring at the floor.

"Oh come on, us Facebook group members have to stick together, y'know" StarForce said optimistically, placing a hand around her shoulder.

"Is that an actual Haiku deviant o3o?" Grenade asked.

"Yeah! All 3 of the people there eFTe!" StarForce smiled.

"We gotta pick up the slack. Let someone else man the controls Riley uwu" Nicholas demanded,

"No…I, I gotta do this." Riley coughed, standing up.

"Riley, look. You're like a brother to me. And I hate my brother. He's retarded. So you remind me of him. You can go ahead and screw up the challenge .w. and therefore get voted off for being a major frick -0- or you can let someone else control it, we can win, and no one has to go home" Nicholas suggested.

"Nicholas, you don't understand. I quit my reviews for this. I trained for months on end for this. I'm not screwing up the one opportunity I have to showcase everything I have built for myself" Riley shot back.

"Well, every time you're around us all you talk about is masturbating and Asian woman it's kind of hard to take you seriously after all of that" Isaac shrugged.

Riley sat down in the seat once more, grabbing the throttle.

"One last chance. I am going to prove you all that I am good at this" Riley confidently declared.

Giant Robot stood up. Mozilla Firefox watched from several miles away as its color scheme changed to cyan blue, like a blazing blue fire.

ROUND 2

FIGHT!

Mozilla Firefox cracked a smile as Giant Robot charged at it. Before they collided, Mozilla Firefox stepped out of the way, causing Giant Robot to run headfirst into another skyscraper.

Imboo leaped over a gate as the toilets chased him down. They followed on him like a pack of vicious wolves. Like my simile? Subscribe for more quality writing.

"You bakas are so gay….even if you wanted to enslave humanity why take down the one who brought you to life!" Imboo screamed at them.

"EXTERMINATE! EXTERMINATE!" the toilets screamed.

[Imboo in le confession toilet]  
"Well GOLLY. That's the last time I try reasoning with a toilet."  
[le end]

Imboo ran into the movie studio, where Mike was currently working on his show.

"Snarf, snarf. You're not supposed to be here Snarf" Snarf said.

Imboo punched Snarf in his squanch and ran past him.

The toilets followed closely.

"Snarf?" Snarf asked as a flushing sound beckoned him.

"Hey Mikey, you did really good today. You look so good in costume, ahaha, it would be cool if we could maybe hang out sometime ahahah and maybe catch a movie or something ahaha and maybe I can tie you up and blindfold you and spoon feed you my homemade macaroni and cheese recipe so you can tell me your opinion on it except I won't feel as if you were saying its good just because I made it because you wouldn't know it was me who kidnapped you so the answer would be completely unbiased ahaha" Mitsuki blushed.

"Thanks" Mike said.

"MIKE! MIKE!" Imboo screamed.

"Mike? Miiike? I've never heard that name before…who do you think he's referring to?" Mitsuki asked.

"I don't know. Run along kid, we have no Mike here. Just me, Lily, Mitsuki, Mikey, and Gonard." Lily scoffed.

"Mike. Mike we have to go!" Imboo panicked.

"Who is this Mike?!" Lily asked.

"This guy you idiots" Imboo said, pointing at Mike.

"That's Mikey" Mitsuki said.

"Are you seriously telling me you've never heard someone call Mikey Mike before?" Imboo asked.

"mii…iii….ike…." Gonard said, sounding out the syllables.

"I'm talking about Michael. We're friends. Kinda. We have to go" Imboo demanded.

"Wait there's a Michael now?" Mitsuki asked.

The toilets caught up with Imboo.

"Ah don't worry guys I'm an expert on using toilets" Gonard boasted, walking over and getting devoured by one.

"kinky vore -3-" Mike noted.

Everybody ran from the toilets as it put Gonard on a leash.

"NOW HUMAN, SMELL THEIR TRACKS AND TAKE US TO THEM" the toilet commanded Gonard.

"bork bork. Haha just kidding it's still me, Gonard. I'll find those guys for you" Gonard said.

Mike threw a gadget at a building, leaving a long, thin string with it. Mike and Imboo grabbed onto the string and swung across buildings. Lily and Mitsuki were left stranded on the building.

"Wow thanks" Lily said sarcastically.

"Now that?" Mutsuki asked.

"I hear the toilet race has nice insurance benefits for their slaves" Lily informed Mitsuki.

"Hm" Mitsuki shrugged, and both of the walked back toward the toilets.

Using its tail, Giant Robot threw a katana up in the air and caught it in its claw. Giant Robot swung the katana around, beckoning Mozilla Firefox to come and attack. Firefox scoffed, flapping its wings and creating a dust storm. Firefox took flight and flew with great speed toward the Giant Robot, but Giant Robot twirled the katana and took a stab at Firefox. Firefox twirled and avoided the stab, flying behind Giant Robot now. Giant Robot turned around as Mozilla Firefox kicked it square in the chest, knocking it back some. Giant Robot retaliated by tossing the katana, striking one of Firefox's wings and causing it to crash onto the ground.

Cloud and Ziggy were shoving at each other, trying to grab the control.

"Get out of my way, r-tard :C" Cloud yelled.

"n-n-n-no! baka! We're in here together, stop trying to act like you're the only one in charge of the arm" Ziggy complained.

Cloud and Ziggy tried to move but ended up stuck tightened on each other.

"Sorry Ziggy, if this looks gay to the viewers…" Cloud sighed.

Giant Robot picked up Mozilla Firefox and slammed it against its knee, causing Firefox to cry in pain as it fell back to the ground. Giant Robot lifted its fist, about to pound on Firefox, when another cry alarmed him. He turned around to see Godzilla staring him down.

[Berserker in le confession toilet]  
"We're on his turf…"  
[le end]

Godzilla's eyes were stoned red as he coughed out a puff of smoke, blowing it towards Giant Robot and Mozilla Firefox. They coughed and waved the smoke away from them as the smoke settled on the surface.

"Huh. So that's why Japan has so much pollution .w." Isaac noticed

Godzilla roared and slowly, slowly, very slowly, walked toward Giant Robot and Firefox. They both stood up ready to fight as Godzilla swung its tail, knocking a skyscraper down.

Giant Robot swung its dildo fist at Godzilla but Godzilla caught it, grabbing Giant Robot and twirling him around, then letting go and letting him fly into Mozilla Firefox, the two spun backwards and knocked themselves into a series of buildings.

Mike and Imboo were running down the street when they noticed the buildings coming crashing down. They turned around to see the toilets still in hot puruit.

"Swastikal" Mike said.

"What the heck do we do!" Imboo panicked.

Mike looked over and saw the robots crashing into buildings. As they got up, Mike took a hookshot out of his pocket and aimed it at Mozilla Firefox. Imboo grabbed onto Mike as he clung onto the monster, and the two were whisked off the ground and sent flying towards the robot.

"haha, try to get us now you-"

The toilets then activated their jetpacks and began flying in the air, continuing their chase.

"Why are Japanese toilets so highly advanced!" Imboo screamed

Mozilla Firefox looked over and noticed Imboo and Mike clinging onto them. It swept its claw, attempting to brush them off, but punched a toilet insetead. The toilet exploded and shit spewed everywhere. Firefox waved its hand quickly.

"fuck my ass shit" Carz said.

Mike swung over and latched onto Giant Robot instead. Mozilla Firefox swiped at them but tripped over a small town, then came crashing down and landing face first onto the ground.

The toilets speedily flew towards the two. Giant Robot prepared to attack the toilets but Godzilla grabbed it by its waste and lifted it up. All of Team Jacob screamed as Godzilla turned the robot upside down and piledrived it into the ground. The robot tried to stand up, and noticed a horde of toilets flying directly toward it. It let out a punch, sending the toilets flying elsewhere.

Meanwhile at Hatena Headquarters…

"Have any of you listed to Justin Bieber's What Do You Mean song?" Hate asked.

"What Do You Mean?" Cinnamon asked.

"No, no, that's the name of the song!" Hate explained.

"Why are we talking about Justin Bieber. Isn't he a 2011 thing?" Usalimolink asked.

"Well yeah but so are we" Cinnamon pointed out.

"Good point" Usalimolink admitted.

Suddenly, a barrage of toilets came crashing through the windows, cracking in half and spewing shit everywhere. All of the Haiku employees were drenched with shit and knocked on the floor where they were showered with feces. Hate spit some shit out of his mouth and walked to the window.

"FUcka YOU HAIKKUERS!" he screamed out the window.

Giant Robot tried to balance himself, but Godzilla punched him in the head, then grabbed him and threw him on top of Mozilla Firefox.

"I'm going to give this round to Giant Robot for being beat up last" Admin declared, holding a microphone as he watched the battle from a distant skyscraper.

Mike and Imboo landed on the headquarters of some company. Letting go of the hookshot, the two watched as the remaining toilets met with them on the building.

Mozilla Firefox and Giant Robot stood up, panting with fatigue.

"How exactly can robots be getting tired?" Rydli questioned.

"Oil?" Pseudonym guessed.

"Good enough for me uwu" Rydli shrugged.

"Ok we need to team up against Godzilla if we want to not get our asses kicked again" Grenade said through Mozilla Firefox's mouth.

"We can't beat Godzilla he's fucking Godzilla, he never loses" Riley said.

"Well he needs to mind his own business xD we were fucking this place up way before he was" Element complained.

"Not really he's been doing this since the 50s dB" Joe said.

"Well maybe we can find a way to make him fuck off? ewe" Grenade suggested.

"Hmm. Hey, does Kirby still have the vape o3o?" Grenade wondered.

"Gluvr, please report to the main deck with vape in hand" Element announced.

Godzilla just stood awkwardly as Mozilla Firefox and Giant Robot stood motionless, bickering to each other from the insides.

Kirby walked up to the mouth with the vape.

"Alright, now let's give this a shot" Grenade said, walking over to the mouth and dropping the vape outside.

With one of its claws, Firefox caught the vape, Then turned around and threw it as far away as it could throw.

"Go get it" it ordered Godzilla.

Godzilla froze for a few seconds, then slowly started walking away so it could go vape.

ROUND 3

FIGHT!

Mozilla Firefox punched Giant Robot, but Giant Robot deflected the punch and rebutted with a kick. Firefox punched away at Giant Robot's open stomach as it was kicked, then fell to one knee as it lost balance. Giant Robot swooped its dildo arm toward Firefox's head but Firefox missed, causing the dildo to instead strike the building Imboo, Mike, and the toilets were on. They all jumped out of the way.

Inside the building, Capcom executives were discussing serious business.

"So, we found some players hacking on our Street Fighter servers" someone announced.

"Alright, and what should we do about it?" another asked.

"I'm not sure, but what do you guys think about adding some costume dlc that can only be purchased with real money?" another proposed.

Positive chatter erupted around the table.

"Hey, why are we speaking English?" someone asked.

Then the building collapsed and the walls came crumbling down on everyone.

Mike fainted on the ground. Imboo opened his eues and stood up. He looked across and saw the single, remaining toilet laying on the ground. Imboo looked down and saw a gun between him and the toilet. He quickly picked it up and pointed it at the toilet.

"You don't have to do this…..we can live together, peacefully…..please, creator…..I…love you…" the toilet coughed.

"Sorry. But it's about time I flush." Imboo stated, pulling the trigger, the bullet directly hit the toilet, killing it.

Imboo looked down and sighed. It was his first toilet-related murder.

[Admin in le confession toilet]  
"That was the last time I left Imboo alone with a task"  
[le end]

A bunch of Japanese people crowded the area.

"oooh, did you kill innocent toilet?" someone asked.

"I had no choice. The toilet could have harmed me" Imboo explained.

"Toilet did nothing wrong! Toilet had full life ahead of it!" someone else said.

"It was a toilet" Imboo defended.

A bunch of Japanese people ripped their shirts off, revealing a toilet t-shirt.

"We will not rest until justice is brought to poor toilet! Dicks in the toilet!" someone shouted.

"Dicks in the toilet!" everyone chanted.

Giant Robot took another swing at Firefox, but Firefox caught the first and turned it back so he punched himself. The blow was so big Riley was knocked out of his seat. Giant Robot collapsed on the ground. Firefox kicked at it while it was on the ground. Riley flew to the back of the head, crashing against the wall and landing on his face unconscious.

"Shit, we need someone else to control it" Lemon said.

"Good, maybe we'll win now -3-" Nicholas said.

[le flashback]

It was the distant time of 2006…7 year olds Riley and Jake were on the playground.

"Hi Jake" Riley smiled, sitting alone on the swing set.

"Hey Riley. What are you up to?" Jake asked, joining him on the seat next to it.

"Nothin. Just looking at the clouds." Riley said, looking upwards.

"Oh, that's cool. Have you gotten any new games lately?" Jake asked.

"Not yet. But this new Sonic game just came out and you get to play as Sonic AND Shadow and a NEW hedgehog!" Riley said excitedly.

"Whoa, really? That's so cool. I bet it's going to be the best game ever!" Jake smiled.

Some other kids walked by, noticing Jake and Riley.

"Well, well, well, if it isn't dofus and dorker" Armando teased.

"Don't you mean dork and dorker?" Jake asked.

"yeah only a dork like you would know that" Armando scoffed.

"Aren't you that gay kid who said Shadow the Hedgehog was a bad game?" Armando asked, pointing a finger at Riley and raising an eyebrow.

"he said gay…this guy is really mean…." Jake whispered to himself.

"I just don't think it's that good. The controls are bad, the story is stupid, and-"

Armando punched Riley off his swing set.

"Whoa, calm down Armando" Josh pleaded.

"It's Sonic with GUNS. How can that not be the most bad-butt thing you've ever played?!" Armando asked.

"You guys like it now, but I bet 10 years from now you'll all be making fun of it" Riley yelled at them.

"Whatever, dude. If you hate Shadow so much why do you carry around this dumb doll of him?" Armando asked, taking Shadow out of Riley's backpack.

"Don't touch him!" Riley panicked, tackling Armando and grabbing Shadow, putting him back in his backpack and zipping it up quickly.

"Whatever. Nobody likes you, Riley. Pfft, nothing personal kid, but one cares what you have to say. You're just a nerd and that's all you'll ever be!" Armando yelled at him, walking away.

"Well, uh, bye" Josh waved, following behind Armando.

"Did you hear they're making a new Super Smash Bros game? It's going to have Sonic in it!" Armando said.

"Whoa that's so cool. I feel bad though, once it comes out no one will like Melee anymore" Josh sighed as they walked away.

Riley got back on the swing set, holding his backpack in front of him and hugging it nervously, face planted on top of it as he sobbed.

"Hi Riley….can I touch your socks?" Calvin asked.

"Not now, Calvin." Jake said.

Calvin walked away.

Jake got off his seat and moved closer to Riley, rubbing his back.

"My daddy gave me this before he left…I, I just want to keep him with me, somehow. I don't want my family to be separated…" Riley cried.

"At least you have a daddy" Jake said quietly.

"Oh, I'm sorry Jake. I-"

"It's ok. I know you didn't mean it." Jake reassured, looking at the ground and kicking the sand.

"Jake, will you always be my friend?" Riley asked.

"Sure" Jake said.

"One day, I want people to think I'm important" Riley said.

Riley looked up at the clouds.

"I want people to hear what I have to say and think it's good. I want people to treat me like I'm special. I want to be someone others can look up to. No one listens to what I have to say, no one thinks I'm good at anything…but I want to prove them wrong…I want to have lots of friends, I want to go to lots of places. But my line of friends starts with you" Riley said.

"That's cool, I'm late for fingerpainting. I'll see you later, Riley." Jake said, walking away and waving goodbye.

"And Riley, I think you matter" Jake called out.

Riley smiled at Jake as he left.

[le back to le present]

Riley opened his eyes, looking around and seeing the destruction. He picked up his pokeball beanie and tightened it around his head.

"Riley? Are you ok O_O?" Lemon asked.

Riley walked past him, and Isaac, and Nicholas.

"Fuck off buddy I'm controlling it now -3-" Nicholas said.

Riley kept walking before breaking into a sprint.

"What the heck is wrong with you eFTe?" Nicholas asked.

Riley kept running faster and faster until he busted through the eye windows and leaped out of the robot.

"What the heck O3O!" Isaac shouted

Everyone inside Mozilla Firefox watched in awe as Riley crashed through his team's window, flying through the air. He came crashing down, and held a fist in front as he smashed through the Firefox's eyes, landing inside the head. Element fell out of his seat, Grenade jumped in the pilot seat to take over as Element stood up, Riley was walking closer to him.

"I'm going to kick your ass" Riley threatened.

"If that's how it's going to be, bring it on" Element said, swinging his keyboard around and tapping the keyboard rhythmically.

"Grovel before my psycho power!" Element said.

Riley threw out a series of punches and Element blocked each one with his keyboard. Element pressed some keys to activate traps, making the ground below Riley pop spikes up, or release a short burst of flame at Riley's head, but Riley jumped and ducked to avoid them. The Troll Slaiyers all watched as Riley and Element kept backing up as they fought. Riley continued to throw punched and Element kept blocking with his keyboard, ducking Riley's kicks, and leaping over his low sweeps. Riley began to get angry

[Jake in le confession toilet]  
"He's activating his ragequit aura…"  
[le end]

Riley threw his punched out faster and faster, Element tried to keep up. He started panting as Riley made him keep backing up. Element turned around to see how much room was left. Riley punched at Element's gut and grabbed his keyboard, tossing it to the side. Element tried blocking with his fists but Riley kicked and punched roughly. Element backed into the wall where Riley delivered blow after blow from an unprotected Element.

"Should we do something?" Joe asked.

"Let them fight.." StarForce said.

Riley punched over and over. Element winced after each strike. He punched back at Riley, but Riley was so intense he was sweating profusely. He wouldn't stop pounding on Element.

"I'm gonna be someone people look up to"

Punch punch punch kick punch uppercut punch kick

"I'm gonna be someone people count on"

Kick kick punch punch one-two one-two and jab jab

"I'm gonna be someone that matters"

Jab, jab, jab, jab, one-two, one-two, GO GO GO

"Every player chooses their destiny"

GO GO GO, PUNCH PUNCH PUNCH

"Every character has their story"

Element tried to stay focused. He opened his eyes and saw Riley continuing to pound on him.

"This is mine, Element." He said to him.

Element panted lightly.

"Overkill much." Element coughed.

"I don't care what you have to say"

Riley reached his arm back.

"Because GenesisFrenzy does what Nintendon't."

Riley punched Element in the face, knocking him out and winning the challenge.

Mozilla Firefox collapsed on the street, marking a huge crater. The limbs snapped off and dust swarmed the area. The haikuers in Giant Robot came out the ass joyously.

"We did a win x3" J exclaimed.

"I did a hacking xD" Reu laughed.

The Troll Slaiyers coughed as they exited the different body parts of the Firefox. They climbed out of the rubble to meet with Team Jacob in the center of the crater, where Admin was waiting patiently for them.

"Congratulations, Troll Slaiyers. You lose. Again. Which means after tonight, the teams will be tied, 13 players each. And you still probably don't know more than 5 of your own team" Admin proclaimed.

Riley climbed out of the Firefox next, carrying a Starbucks coffee in his hand.

"I did it, guys. I redeemed myself! Now that that's over with, I can go look for some Asian woman to stalk. Hello ladies" riley said, looking at a local's ass.

"Riley, the challenge is over. It's time to go uwu" Jake said.

"I kinda feel bad for dismantling the entire city of Tokyo with our fight" J said.

"Really? You feel bad for destroying Tokyo but won't show any regret in blowing up my Minecraft sever?" Nicholas snapped.

"I can't be trusted with tnt x3!" J giggled.

"It's fine, Tokyo gets wiped out every other week by some giant monster anyways." Admin shrugged.

Element was crying, rubbing the tears away as he dug his fedora over his eyes.

"Really Element crying over Street Fighter again owo" Rydli asked.

"DX I tried my best but still failed, I put all my effort into it and lost to Riley of all people! dB I'm MADJELLY bro!" Element shouted.

"Jesus Christ why are you all asking so stupid lately?" Riley asked.

"Lately ewe?" Grenade asked back.

"I guess Japan brought out our inner kawaii past selves uwu" Joe said.

"Ew, disgusting XD I WOULDN't be caight dead acting liket this ipulbic Dxddd Db HAHAHAHAH 0W0" Clloud SAID.

"I 3 kawaii past selves!" Mike said as he and Imboo arrived on the scene.

"Admin, I got you this toilet" Imboo said, letting go of the toilet in front of him and collapsing on the ground.

"Why are there a bunch of dicks in it? And is that a bullet hole?" Admin asked.

"Wait, I don't get it. If everyone else is acting all kawaii and weird why haven't I been?" Riley asked.

"Because you're still stupid and say ridiculous things by our current standards xD" Jake said.

"Wow, I didn't know you guys thought that way about me. I really appreciate it…" Riley said.

"It wasn't really a compliment :s" Jake said.

"No, you're right. I'm a lot cooler than I thought I was. You guys really do think I'm awesome. Thanks, guys. Shadow, let's get back to doing our reviews" Riley laughed, grabbing Shadow out of his backpack and kissing him.

"Well I guess everything is resolved here o3o" Jp said.

"Wait, where's Gingerale oDo" Marrowsky asked.

"Wow, there's a question we never thought would be asked xD" Moogle said.

Everyone turned around to see Gingerale still in the giant robot. He was shoving the dildo hand of the Giant Robot into the mouth of the Mozilla Firefox repeatedly, forcing it deeper and deeper in with each thrust.

"Hahaha, take this you stupids!" Gingerale laughed to himself.

"Gingerale we all left the robots" Admin scrreamd thought the megaphone.

Gingerale stopped and the Robot stood motionless.

"I knew that. Was just messing around…" Gingerale assured them all.

"Wow that would have sucked if we were still in there" Kirby said.

"Literally xDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD" Grenade added.

Everyone boyardeed the plane as the Chef Boyardee can rolled past the crater.

[Robot in le confession toilet]  
"Overall good day. Besides the fact that the one thing I'm known for on this show was featured and I didn't have any role in it whatsoever. But besides that, it was a good day."  
[le end]

Team Jacob was enjoying themselves in first class, playing connect 4 and touching their penises.

"haha that's three in a row" Isaac said.

"Oh no I'm going to lose in connect 4!" Nicholas panicked.

J was lighting things on fire and eating tea bags. Reu walked by grabbing a can of the best soda ever in existence, Diet Pepsi, and walked into Gingerale, who was sitting by himself in a booth by the plane wall. Reu took a seat across from him.

"Want to share a drink?" Reu asked him, offering a Diet Pepsi.

"No thanks I'm not a fucking loser" Gingerale snarfed.

"Pika pika pi..' Reu sighed.

"Yeah, well. Who needs them" Gingerale shrugged, watching the others celebrate the victory across the room.

[Gingerale in le confession toilet]  
"It's time I confess something in the toilet. Wow this new toilet is really nice, my ass feels very heated and I haven't even stuck an amiibo in it yet. Anyways, I've been feeling kinda distant from Nick ever since he had to kill a Grovyle to save my life. We haven't been talking that much, since I feel bad about it….but whatever, I'm sure things will work out. I'll just find other haikuers to hang out with. It's not like there's some kind of Gingerale brigade uprising"  
[le end]

"People change, Reu. We make new friends, and lose others. Sometimes you just have to move on" Gingerale said to him. They both glanced over and watched Nicholas and Isaac engage in an epic battle of connect 4.

"THIS IS SO FUCKING INTENSE MY PANTS ARE SOAKED WITH CUM" Sam shouted.

"Same minus the semen" Lemon agreed.

Riley was eating doritos, a homage to the original Haiku Drama, which invented the snack.

"Hey Riley" J greeted.

"Hey, uh, uhhh…still not great with names here….starts with a J, right?" Riley asked.

"You did a pretty jreat job right there :D" J said.

"I'm looking at lolis right now can you come back later?" Riley asked.

"Ooooh, I'm not really into lolis, I'm more of a furry guy" J said.

"What? Ew. Gross. Ew. Don't ever say that again. Just kidding I like furries I went to a furry convention once" Riley reminisced.

"That's cool! Well see yiou around Rliey you did pretty good today" J complimented.

"men"

Meanwhile, Troll Slaiyers were eating dinner at the. Cloud walked over and gave Element an EPIC wedgie, pulling his underwear all the way up to his head.

"8999 more to go bro oFTo" Cloud said.

"Wait, Cloud, are you still infected with the kawaiiness?" StarForce asked.

"Nah bro I'm just using the emote ironically xD" Cloud said.

"Oh ok! C:" StarForce said.

[Mr. Moogle in le confession toilet]  
"Nothing wrong with a classic c:, nice and pure, no irony needed"  
[le end]

"Alright, gamers, who should we vote off?" Jp asked.

"Wait, we can vote in this?" Kirby asked.

"Maybe we could form an alliance to get enough votes to get rid of Rydli" Jp suggested.

"I'm right here. The entire team is right here. You can't really conspire against the team when we're all gathered" Rydli said.

"I think he's on to us" Jp whispered to Joe.

Joe was disinterested in the conversation, stabbing her squid with a fork.

"What if we voted against Carz. Since he contributes nothing to the team and just screams random things all the time but has still managed to outlast DaUser and Eden" Pseudonym suggested.

Everyone thought for a good moment and shrug emoted.

"Eh, DaUser and Eden's memes weren't dank enough" Jp said.

"What the heck. DaUser has very dank memes I'll have you know" Kirby defended.

"Hey guys want to hear my DaUser impression. . There it is, did you like it?" Pantz asked.

Kirby giggled.

"I liked it"

"Well I think I've had enough squid to ink myself over the toilet all night. I'm gonna go cast my vote and head to the chamber" Pantz announced, getting up and leaving.

"Hold up, Pantz, let me come with you" Kirby insisted, getting out of the seat and following her.

Grenade and Pseudonym focused on them as they exited.

"I don't know about you guys, but I got so many streetpasses today" Jp said.

"Oh yeah me too" Rydli said, taking his 3ds out.

"Oh hey I didn't because streetpass is fucking gay as hell" Cloud added.

"Ugh, you guys are just trying to rub in my face how much I'm missing out because I forgot my 3ds, aren't you?" Mr. Moogle questioned.

"How'd you forget it anyways, shouldn't it have been a priority going to haiku-con?" Marrowsky asked.

"It was in the shop for repairs, alright! It's probably back for now but that doesn't matter! Oh well" Mr. Moogle sighed.

"I feel like the attention hasn't been geared towards me in 5 seconds. How about we talk about how much I kicked ass in today's challenge?" Cloud brought up.

"You mean nail Ziggy's ass?" Jp asked.

Some haikuers giggled.

"No…no…that isn't canon, bro…" Cloud said,

"I thought Ziggy would have been the top considering Cloud's small wiener" StarForce said.

"Yeah but Ziggy's such a bitch" Moogle argued.

"Ok bro StarForce you gotta stop inspecting our dicks at night, it's not cool bro. Unless you find out my penis is bigger than everyone elses, which is is, then it is ok to announce the size to everyone else" Cloud said.

Ziggy got up and left the table, leaving his full plate sitting on the table. The others watched him leave, not saying a word, then shrugged and got back to their fucking autistic Japanese cuisine.

Ziggy was walking through the corrider, taking a lean against the wall and sighing, when Rydli appeared from the shadows.

"J, is that you?" Ziggy asked.

"No, it's me, Rydli, Zig. You're good pal, Rydli. We're good friends, right?" Rydli asked him, placing an arm around his shoulder and smiling.

"Didn't you try to eliminate me?" Ziggy asked.

"Birds pooping on cars, man, you didn't get eliminated, so could I have really been against you?" Rydli asked.

"I don't know, you're kind of a gayer…" Ziggy admitted, turning his eyes to face the ground.

"You seem troubled, Ziggy. Is there anything I can help you with?" Rydli asked.

"No, it's just…between you and me, I think I was starting to develop feelings for one of our teammates…" Ziggy admitted, stumbling over the words a bit.

"Oh, is there anything I can do to help? I am an expert with attracting people, you know. Heh, just this past week I benched 500 pounds and signed 300 girls autographs. It sucked, girls are pretty gay. But you can't live with them. Anyways, what?" Rydli asked.

"Look, I just…" Ziggy said, knocking Rydli's arm away and walking away a bit. He wouldn't look at Rydli directly as he continued.

"I don't want to go through this again. I don't want to hurt anyone. I've messed up before, and I can't risk it happening to someone again and ruining what we have." Ziggy confessed.

"Oh, I see. Personally I can't relate turning down girls is a hobby of mine, but that is a dilemma. But it's ok, Ziggy. I think you know what you need to do." Rydli said encouragingly, putting his arm back around Ziggy.

"I do?" Ziggy asked, looking back at Rydli curiously.

"Yes. No one has to be hurt. If you choose it." Rydli advised, letting go of Ziggy and walking away.

Ziggy stayed alone in the corridor for a moment.

[Ziggy in le confession toilet]  
"No pupper foul…"  
[le end]

The Troll Slaiyers were gathered once again in the elimination chamber.  
Rydli, Element, Pseudonym, Carz, Jp, Grenade, Ziggy, Cloud, Joe, Kirby, Marrowsky, Mr. Moogle, Pantz, and StarForce were all sitting on the bleachers.

"I have with me, 13 Mountain Dew Code Reds. By the end of this night, one of you shall be dewless, and will be eliminated from Haiku Drama World Tour...forever. Taking the drop of shame and losing out on 1,000,000 stars, and having to survive alone in Japan." Admin announced.

"That last part doesn't sound too bad" Kirby said.

"Yeah if I got voted off here I wouldn't mine Japan is a pretty chill place to be stranded" Jp agreed.

"Ugh, weebs. Disgusting. But nonetheless, you all casted your votes, and I got with me the expired passport" Admin said, holding it up.

"Let's find out who it belongs to…" Admin said.

The haikuers looked around nervously.

"The first 3 safe, are Kirby, Jp, and Pantz" Admin began.

They all sat patiently.

"What, you aren't going to come up and get it?" Admin asked.

"I thought you would throw it at us" Jp said.

"WELL STOP BEING LAZY BITCHES AND COME UP AND GRAB IT AHHAHAHHA!" Admin screamed.

"…k" Kirby said.

The three walked up and received their symbol of immunity.

"Also safe tonight, we got Mr. Moogle, Marrowsky, Pseduo, Grenade, and the Rydster" Admin continued.

Each walked up and grabbed their dew.

"Hey mine isn't cold" Moogle complained.

"Sounds like a you problem, douchebag" Admin said.

"Oh…" Mr. Moogle replied, taking his seat.

Carz, StarForce, Element, Joe, Ziggy, and Cloud were still sitting.

"gonna kill you haikuers if I don't get a mountain dew sac" Carz threatened.

"Don't worry Carz, you are safe too. As well as StarForce and Elemetn" Admin announced.

Carz got up and took his mountain dew can and shoved it up his ass. StarForce grabbed his hapilly and returned to his seat. Element sighed and took his, returning to his seat and looking at his can with a sad expression.

"That leaves Joe, Ziggy, and Cloud. This is it, guys. One of you will not be continuing after this night…" Admin reminded them.

Joe and Ziggy both looked down shyly, lacking any sort of emotion. They were sitting at opposite ends of the bleachers, with Cloud sitting between the two of them.

"WTF, how can I be in the bottom 3? I know you assholes didn't vote for me, I guarantee this show would be 100% less interesting without me. I'm boycotting Haiku Drama if I lose" Cloud yelled.

"Dude just shut up and let me build up suspension. Geez. Joe, take this can" Admin said.

Joe walked up and took her can.

"WHAT THE FUCK BRO" Cloud complained.

"Japan's most beloved couple, about to be separated…how traumatic…" Mr. Moogle said.

"Ok let me set this straight. You see I am like the Naruto of haiku. You can't fucking get rid of Naruto. Ziggy is like Sasuke, he might seem as cool as me but really he's a fucking faggot and we can get rid of him for a while." Cloud explained.

"Cloud complaining isn't going to change the fucking results" Rydli yelled at him.

"Shut up Rydli! You will never be as good as me in Smash!" Cloud yelled.

Rydli took his shirt off, revealing a 12-pack and chest hair that reflected nicely with his well-toned chest.

"You wanna go, bro?" Rydli asked.

"bitches, bitches, settle down. It's time we distribute the final can. Cloud, or Ziggy? I wonder who it will go to. Hmmmm. Hmmmmmmmm. I wonder…." Admin said, tossing the can up and down and catching it over and over.

Cloud tapped his foot impatiently on the ground. Ziggy watched the can disinterestedly with his hands to his head.

[Cloud in le confession toilet]  
"This is utter bullshit I knew I should have voted for Rydli that sneaky Jew, I wasted my vote on myself to be ironic I wasn't expecting this to be the result…"  
[le end]

[Ziggy in le confession toilet]  
"I'm not going to bother anyone anymore. No one else will be hurt by a loser like me"  
Ziggy stamps his own passport and submits it into the ballot.  
[le end]

"The final can goes to….Cloud" admin finished, tossing him the can.

"THANKX BRO" Cloud said, opening the can and having it gush all over his face.

"That's why I had the others come up to grab them" Admin explained.

"Zigger, drop of shame awaits, bro…" Admin said, pointing him towards the door.

"Ziggy.." Joe said quietly.

"Ok l8r faggers lol top snek" Ziggy said, strapping on his parachute.

"Wait, Ziggy. You didn't mean for this to happen, did you?" Cloud asked, walking up to him face to face.

"I….don't wish to be associated with haikuers anymore" Ziggy said quietly.

"Ziggy! You didn't vote for yourself, did you? Unironically, I mean!" Cloud questioned him.

"snek court

Lol.

It's time I move on Clit." Ziggy sighed, turning toward the door.

"But Ziggy…" Cloud began genuinely. Ziggy held the sides of the door as the wind from the outside blew in his face.

"We love you, bro. You'll come back, right?" Ziggy asked.

"Nobody will miss me." Ziggy said coldly, refusing to turn around. Ziggy leaped out of the plane, activating his parachute and gliding closer towards the surface. He entered a bunch of smoke disposed by Godzilla vaping and Cloud could no longer see him.

Cloud walked back towards the rest of the team.

"At least he's where he can be happy" Jp said.

"What place could make him happier than plowing Cloud's buttocks?" Marrowsky asked.

"Not canon, bro." Cloud reminded him nonchalantly.

The 13 remaining Troll Slaiyers got off the bleachers and started walking to their beds (benches).

[StarForce in le confession toilet]  
"OH YEAH BRO gonna play with myself tonight"  
[le end]

[Rydli in le confession toilet]  
"Ah, Ziggy gone. Poor soul made it all too easy. But hey, maybe with him gone the aftermath can lead to some more prey."  
Rydli laughed because he bad.  
[le end]

The Troll Slaiyers were strapping themselves to the wall as they prepared for slumber. Cloud was digging in his bag in search of a sleeping mask when he felt something he didn't recognize.

"What's this?" Cloud asked himself, pulling it out of his bag. It was a small, torn off piece of paper with some handwriting on it.

Cloud examined it while the rest of the haikuers were preoccupied with their own things.

"goodnoity"

End of Day 403

Initiation at 34.21%

End of Act 1

22-7-26-19 / 7-26-15-15-4-13-4-3 / 19-14 / 26-26-17-14-13 / 8-18 / 26 / 19-22-8-18-19 / 24-14-20 / 3-14 / 13-14-19 / 22-26-13-19 / 19-14 / 22-8-19-13-4-18-18


	15. The Haikuers Go To Far

Chapter 14: The Haikuers Go To Far

The sun was shining, the birds were getting sucked into the turbine engines, and not a cloud was to be seen. It was a beautiful day outside the plane, but inside the plane it was hot as shit.

"Haha it's so hot in here did my new mixtape drop or something?" Kirby joked.

Everyone groaned. Grenade tried to get off the bench, but his skin was stuck to the seat. He moved frantically, trying to detach himself, but his shirt was stuck to it like a sticky substance, something that makes things stick to other things. What is something that makes things sticky. Honey. He stuck to it like honey.

Carz approached Grenade holding a razor blade with his pubes on it.

"Carz please don't touch me. I got this" Grenade said, pulling his shirt over his head and leaving the seat now shirtless.

"Wow, Grenade. You're fat." Pantz noticed.

"I'm not fat I'm just a little chubby" Grenade said, feeling his tummy wummy.

"Grenade as an anti-obesity attacktavist, you're fucking fat as fuck bro" Rydli agreed.

"Oh shut up…" Greande blusedhsduu.

"What kind of cardio do you do? Maybe I can share you my routine and we can exercise together. I've been looking for a new workout buddy ever since DaUser left.

"You and DaUser worked out together?" Kirby asked.

"Did he stutter?" Pseudo asked back.

"Well yeah, but it didn't feel right to replace him at the time. I knew he'd be heartbroken if he discovered I was working out with someone other than him…" Marrowsky sighed.

"One time I did a push-up" StarForce chimed in.

Joe was looking down and sighing loudly as she sat away from the others, leaning against one of the walls.

"Something up, Jules?" Kirbs asked.

"Not much" Joe sighed.

"Besides the plane of course. Because it's up in the sky. Haha. Ha…." Kirby joked.

"Yeah" Joe stoically agreed, focusing her attention to her sketch.

"Hmm."

[Kirby in le confession toilet]  
"Something seems off! Julie must still be upset over the last challenge. Don't tell anyone, audience, but I theorize that she is upset because she didn't get to finish the Cloud and Ziggy fanfiction. I need to track it down and show her the hot yaoi and everyone will be happy once more! :D"  
[le end]

Element was hanging from the ceiling, his underwear glued to the roof.

"Cloud I think this has gone to far" Element proclaimed.

"What? Me? I've been busy catching a nice slumber, bro. It couldn't have been me. It was probably StarForce, that little devil" Cloud chuckled.

"What? ME? I didn't do anything" StarForce protested.

"Dude you know how you do crazy things in your sleep, right? Like last week when Jp woke up with pee on her toothpaste? Or when you replaced Pseduo's shampoo with mustard?" Cloud reminded him.

"Well, I guess I could have done it in my sleep…" StarForce unsurely agreed.

"Wait, what happened?" Jp asked.

"You do realize this plane doesn't have a shower right? How exactly is your plan supposed to work?" Pseudo asked Cloud.

"Don't ask me, dude. Ask StarForce. He does all kinds of crazy things in his sleep!" Cloud said.

"Well gee sorry guys…" StarForce apologized.

"So, Cloud. You must be upset over that last challenge, huh?" Mr. Moogle asked.

"Not really." Cloud defiantly answered.

"Well, I mean. That conversation between you and Ziggy sure was interesting…" Moogle continued.

"Hm, yes. Don't remember that. Perhaps you were thinking of StarForce in his sleep talking to Ziggy?" Cloud shrugged.

"No, I think Moogs is right. I cleanly remember that moment between you too. It's ok Cloud, if you aren't feeling up for the challenge, you can let us know, we're here for you, we wouldn't want to manipulate you through your troubled times" Rydli assured him.

"I don't know what you're talking about" Cloud raised a BROW.

"You did tell Ziggy that you….loved him, right?" Moogle asked.

"Uh, no. Don't recall that happening, actually. If I remember correctly Ziggy said that to himself. Not me. Because I'm not gay and DEFINTAELY not a weeb" Cloud reassured them.

"Whatever you say" Rydli shrugged.

Moogle watched Cloud as he laid back against his seat and looked at the ceiling.

[Rydli in le confession toilet]  
"So it seems Cloud is the troubled relationship Ziggy was referring to. How tragic. Now Cloud is alone and vulnerable. Heh. Ha. HAHAHAHA HAHAHAHHASDBJHDBKJASBKJBDJBADJ ALALALLALALALLALALA HAHAHAHHAHH HEHEHEHHEHEH HAHAHAHAH OH OH OH HAHAHHAHAH AHAHAHHAH OOOOO EEEEE AWWWWWWWWW YEAAAAA"  
[le end]

[Cloud in le confession toilet]  
"I don't give a shit about Ziggy, I'm just the only haikuer he doesn't hate apparently."  
[le end]

The members of Team Jacob were gathered around one of the tables in the mess hall, feasting on some undercooked bacon and eggs. Gingerale walked away from the food booths with a slight smile, carrying his plate of Japanese toast. He overlooked the team and tried to find a place to sit. Everyone was too concerned with their own conversations to notice him.

"Ahem." He said.

Nobody broke from their conversation.

"Hey faggots" he said louder.

Everyone kept talking.

"Hey, guys. It's me, The Ginge" he reminded them.

Nobody looked up from the table, instead focusing on their breakfast and speaking to the other Haikuers.

"Yeah I really like what they did with Dildopants after he rescued Princess Cuntface" Jake agreed.

"My favorite character is FartyMcPoo, he's a real cutie~" J added.

"Ok, whatever…" Gingerale rolled his eyes, taking a seat at the end of the table next to Sam.

"So, what's up with those guys? Am I right?" Gingerale asked him.

"SHUT THE FUCK UP FAGGOT I'M TRYING TO NUT" Sam shouted, stabbing Gingerale in the face with his fork.

[Gingerale in le confession toilet]  
"Lately I've been feeling pretty distant from the others. They're acting like a bunch'a jokers. I won't lose my head, though, I'm sure they're just too invested in whatever they're talking about right now"  
[le end]

"So, after we went to Japan, I remembered being in France and seeing their toast. SO I was like, "Do they have a Japanese toast?" Make a long story short, Imboo picked up some and I gotta say I'm quite looking forward to this new adventurous endeavor. " Gingerale said.

"Holy shit I would never have expected that from Princess Cuntface" J exclaimed.

"What the hell are you guys even talking about?" Gingerale asked to no response.

Isaac took a seat from across.

"Oh, that. They're into this new webcomic." Isaac explained, taking a bite out of his raw eggs.

"Isaac, is it me or is everyone acting strange lately?" Gingerale asked.

Isaac turned over and saw J lighting his food on fire, Mike iCarly rping, Riley looking at pictures of Asian woman in the middle of recording a podcast, Sam fapping, Robot fondling her R.O.B. toy, Nicholas talking about Kurtis the Snivy and the corrupt government, Jake erotically stroking a picture of Tito, Blooberri having a vision, Berserker recharging his cannon arm, Reu trying to hack his 3ds and it blowing up in his face, and Lemon cleaning the mess the others have made with his Buffalo Wild Wings busboy skills.

"No, everything seems to be the usual" Isaac said.

"Well, whatever. So how as your weekend?" Gingerale asked.

"It's Wednesday…" Isaac scrathed his head.

"Yeah you and me both, I was thinking about checking out some cock vore simulator if you want to come with. Not that I want you to, though. I invited all of my friends, I'm sure it'll be a huge cock vore fiesta" Gingerale snarfed.

"Sure. I just gotta wash my balls first" Isaac explained.

Reu fell out of his seat, coughing and wiping the black dust off his face.

"Wow Reu you look like a bitch down there" Jake noticed.

"Need some help, Reu?" Lemon asked, offering him a hand.

"REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEu" Mike screeched.

"Thanks, Lem. I was just trying to install a customized theme on my 3ds" Reu explained, opening his New! 3ds XL, available at GameStop, Best Buy, and other local retail as well as online sites such as Amazon. Visit 3ds/new-nintendo-3ds/ for more info!

Lemon opened the 3ds and it caught on fire. Sam smashed a fire extinguisher off Lemon's head and blew the white stuff all over him, completely missing the 3ds. Lemon collapsed on the ground.

"Not so cool" Reu sighed, grabbing the inflamed 3ds and rushing to the bathroom.

"Fire….yasss…." J giggled, skipping towards Reu.

"JESUS CHRIST THIS SHIT IS OUT OF CONTROL" Sam shouted, whipping the fire extinguisher across the room.

Lemon stood back up, holding his head as he dizzily regained balance. The fire extinguisher ricocheted off the titanium wall and smashed against Lemon's head again, exploding on impact and covering the whole room with foam. Jake licked some off the wall.

"Mm, this is like that time that old guy told me to close my eyes and then he stuck a fire extinguisher in my mouth" Jake reminisced.

"Attention, douchebags-"Admin announced over the loudspeaker.

"I'm not a douchebag I'm more of a sengaki potato" Sam whispered to himself.

"Meet in the Troll Slaiyers room, I mean the loser department" Admin ordered.

"For someone who owns a plane you are very uninformed about the rooms we have" Imboo said.

"Shut up Imboo which one of us is the pilot here?" Admin bitched.

"Me, actually." Imboo corrected.

"Holy shit do you want a medal or something? Fuck my ass. Oh yeah so meet in the brig or something. Is it called the brig?" Admin asked.

"No." Imboo answered.

"Fuck you"

The Haikuers all met in the brig.

Lemon scratched his head as he joined the line of Team Jacob members.

"GET DOWN ON THE FLOOR BITCH" Sam shouted, slapping Lemon's ass.

"Sam what did I do?" Lemon asked.

"I don't know you just seem very slutty today" Sam shrugged.

"Do I look slutty~" J murred to Sam.

"You always do hoe" Sam said.

J blushed.

"Ok I change my mind I'm glad I'm on this team and not that one" Pseduo said to Rydli and Moogle as he watched Team Jacob from the opposite side of the room.

"Welcome, bitches. It's time for the next location. Make sure you strap on your parachutes because we're opening the doors in three seconds" Admin announced as he walked in.

"You didn't pass in any parachutes" Mr. Moogle said

"Oops" Admin shrugged.

The doors opened and all of the Haikuers flew out. Jp managed to cling on to the wall as all of the other Haikuers were flying out, but Carz knocked into her assfirst and she lost her grip. Everyone screamed as they plummeted downward. Grenade landed face first into a pool of mud.

"Whoa, hey. I landed alright" Grenade smiled, wiping some mud off his face.

He was then knocked back down into the mud when Jp and Carz fell on top of him. Followed by Marrowsky, Moogle, Rydli, Pseduonym, Pantz, and Kirby landing on him next. Grenade tried to stand up but Cloud, StarForce, Joe, and Element next.

"Whoa thanks for the landing buddy" StarForce thanked.

Grenade crawled out from underneath the pile of Haikuers on top of him, but Carz then landed on him. Followed by Nicholas, Jake, Mike, Lemon, Sam, Reu, Gingerale, Isaac, Robot, Blooberri, and Berserker. Grenade tried to move but J and Riley landed on him next.

"Wow cool I can add this to my vlog" Riley said.

Admin looked down from the plane.

"Uh, they weren't supposed to drop for another 5 minutes" Imboo informed him.

"Oh. Well shit. I hope it isn't too far from our actual destination" Admin conced.

The Haikuers all got out of the mud lake, wiping the mud off and cleansing themselves by rubbing tree bark and squirrels on themselves.

"How are we supposed to get all of this dumb shit off of us?" Pantz complained.

"The same thing we do when we don't want to clean up after making woohoo. Just lick it all off!" StarForce said, licking the mud off of himself.

"StarForce…I…" Pantz watched as he continued to eat the mud off his body.

"I hate this stupid mud it's messing with my circuits Sam why aren't you wearing any clothes?" Robot asked as she paced around.

"What, it's good for the skin" Sam said, rubbing it all over.

"Where are we, anyways?" Gingerale asked.

"Where are we, anyways?" Jake asked.

"I don't know, Jake" Mike answered.

"What the fuck. You just completely ignored me right there" Gingerale complained.

"It appears we are in some kind of…..swamp…." Jake observed.

"ONIONS SHREAK" Mike screamed.

"We should go find Shrek" Berserker suggested/

"Viable idea, Berk" Jake nodded.

"Uh, guys. Maybe we should focus on finding the Admin." Gingerale suggested.

"But where could Shrek be? I hope we aren't trespassing on his swamp…." Blooberri said nervously.

"Come on guys. Really? Are we just going to assume Shrek is here because we landed in a swamp? There's swamps all over the world, the chances that we would actually-" Moogle began but he was cut off when an outhouse door swung open.

"What a load of-"

attachments/185220478695112705/235201204848689155/IMG_

[Mr. Moogle in le confession toilet]  
"I should know by now not to question this"  
[le end]

Shrek let out a huge burp as All-Star started playing loudly. He yawned as the Haikuers listened to the toilet flush. He shook his leg and a page from the book he was reading was blown over to the Haikuers. Isaac picked it up and read through it.

"Hey it's a page from Haiku Drama Island" Isaac noticed.

[J in le confession toilet]  
"Oh, so that's where HDI went after it was deleted"  
[le end]

"Do you think he has more?" J asked.

"J I think he just wiped his ass with this" Isaac said.

Shrek walked away toward his mud bath, where mud rained over him and he farted, causing bubbles to rise in the pool.

"Damn he looks pretty good without a shirt…" Jake blushed.

"Are we doing this? Are we really doing this?" Mr. Moogle asked.

"What do you mean, Moogster?" Cloud asked.

Shrek threw some slugs in his mouth and let out another fart. He scratched his butt and then sniffed his hand as he made his way back toward his home.

"It's just, I don't know. Isn't Shrek kind of an outda-"

Jp grabbed Moogle by the neck and slammed him against the tree. Jp punched him in the stomach several times before bitch slapping his face.

"Don't say it don't even THINK about saying it" Jp threatened.

The rest of the Troll Slaiyers gathered around the tree, Team Jacob was standing by as well glaring at Moogle.

"What the heck did I say? I just think maybe Shrek is kind of….old?" Moogle asked.

Jp grabbed Moogle by the hair and and shoved his face in the dirt. Rydli stomped on his neck, forcing his mouth deeper and forcing the dirt into his mouth. Pantz bent down and took his pants off, letting out a nasty fart in Moogle's face. The teams all gathered and started gangbanging Moogle. Punching and kicking and thrusting until they all picked him up and tossed him into a swamp, removing all of his clothes in the process.

"You can make fun of Undertale. You can make fun of Paw Patrol. But the minute you even attempt to denounce our sacred ogrelord again, you are fucking dead." Cloud threatened him.

Everyone walked away, leaving Moogle alone to wallow in his pool of mud. Moogle coughed up a bunch of mud.

"What the fuck" he cried.

"Shrek is love Shrek is life" Carz added, eating the mud next to Moogle.

The Haikuers started walking towards Shrek's shack, walking past the signs he put up warning them of ogres.

Shrek was enjoying a nice onion in his house.

"Ah, a lovely day with my wife and kdis" Shrek said, taking a bite out of the onion.

Fiona breastfed the Shreklings. A disturbance from outside alerted Shrek. He got out of his seat and peered out the window, where he saw the Haikuers gathering. Shrek opened the door and screamed.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY SWAMP?!" Shrek shrieked.

All of the Haikuers swooned at the sound of his voice.

"ITS F HEIN ISFBINDSLNDS HREAK SHRLA RHLWS JKHS SHREAAAAAK" Mike screamd.

"Ogrse sek" Jake added.

Shrek picked up a sign that said "Beware Ogres" and showed it to all of them.

"Can't you read? I'm an ogre! Rawr! Get out of my swamp!" Shrek ordered.

Berserker ran up to Shrek but Shrek grabbed him by the head and shoved him up his ass, letting out a huge fart.

"If you come near my swamp again that will happen to the lot of yoU!" Shrek threatened, slamming the door behind him and leaving Berserker outside.

"Shrek, wait, we love you dawg. We just want to Shrek Super Slam you dig?" Cloud called out.

"Suck a pig" Shrek called back out.

"I will, Shrek. I will get down on my knees and fully suck a pig if you let me Shrek Super Slam with you." Cloud offered.

"What's the matter, Shrek?" Fiona asked.

"Just a bunch of stupid humans" Shrek sighed, cleaning his ears.

The shreklings grabbed onto Shrek and climbed up his back.

"They're just tourists, honey, I'm sure they will go away" Fiona insisted.

"That's not the point. Nobody takes me seriously anymore Fiona. I used to be someone people feared, now I'm just some kind of joke" Shrek sighed.

"Shrek don't get into that mindset, the last time you thought like that Shrek 4 happened and we don't like to talk about Shrek 4 now do we?" Fiona asked him.

"What do you mean Shrek 4? Shrek 4 what?" Shrek asked.

"You know, your 4th adventure." Fiona reminded him.

"Why do you call it Shrek 4 this isn't some kind of movie Fiona this is real life we're talking about" Shrek complained.

"You're stressing me out, Shrek. I'm going to spend the night at my father's." Fiona sighed, putting her coat on.

"Your father died Fiona!" Shrek reminded her.

"Oh yeah that was in Shrek 3" Fiona forgot.

"WHAT IS SHREK 3" Shrek screamed.

"It's the one nobody cares about" Fiona reminded him.

"I'm going for a walk" Shrek said, throwing the shreklings off of him and exiting his house.

Shrek walked out and the Haikuers took their phones out and quickly snapped pictures of him as he walked past them.

"Shrek can I get an autograph?" Riley asked.

Shrek grabbed Riley and threw him into into a pool of feces.

[Riley in le confession toilet]  
"WHY DOES THIS EXIST"  
[le end]

"Hey Shrek what's going on my man" Donkey asked as he ran up to him.

"Put a sock in it donkey" Shrek scoffed, walking past him. Donkey continued to follow him.

"Perhaps donkey is an allegory for the piece of shit democratic party" Nicholas wondered.

"I want Shrek to impregnate me" Mike added.

"Yes that is also true" Nicholas agreed.

"So, where is the Admin anyways?" Gingerale asked.

No one responded.

"So where do you guys think the Admin is?' Robot asked.

"No idea. I can't even not not even see the not see the see the plane?" Lemon said.

"Lemon why do you sound like a fucking retard" Jake asjed.

"I thinm Sam ut it not hit me ver the head hit me to many ?" Lemon explained.

[Gingerale in le confession toilet]  
"GOD WHAT THE heck IS UP WITH everyone TODAY? It's like I'm completely invisible to the team. No matter. As long as I do well in the challenge nobody will bother with me.  
[le end]

"Hey, Blooberri. Want to know 107 facts about Shrek?" Berserker asked.

"107 huh? Yeah that sounds cool, I can learn a lot from that" Blooberri agreed.

"Fact 1: The title of Shrek is Shrek." Berserker began.

"Oh. Well, alright. Technically that is a fact, I guess." Blooberri shrugged.

"Fact 2: Shrek was developed by Dreamworks." Berserker continued.

"Cool, I guess. It's in the title sequence but whatever" Blooberri shrugged.

"Fact 3: Shrek is an ogre." Berserker continued.

[Blooberri in le confession toilet]  
"How many of these facts are just going to be obvious and uninteresting?"  
[le end]

J was drawing a penis in the mud with his stick when Carz splashed in the pool of mud.

"Tito Dickman" Carz screamed, eating J's shidek dick.

Blooberri watched and gushed over her husband.

"Fact 28: Smash Mouth plays the song All Star in Shrek." Berserker continued.

Berserker noticed Blooberri watching Carz and sighed.

"Are you paying attention?" Berserker asked.

"Huh, oh yeah." Blooberri said.

"What did I say?" Berserker asked.

"Uh…Donkey is actually a Donkey?" Blooberri guessed.

"Hm. You're absorbing all of these facts pretty quickly." Berserker admired.

[Blooberri in le confession toilet]  
"Carz is a cutie. It's like being with a monster. But that monster has a heart of gold deep inside.  
[le end]

"hi" Carz said.

A chariot approached the Haikuers. They all watched as a horse carriage pulled up, carrying Admin and Imboo. Moogle walked up to the gang.

"You know getting mud out of my underwear was no easy feat" Moogle complained.

Admin stepped out of the carriage.

"Greeting, kuers. Sorry for dropping you off in the wrong destination" Admin apologized.

"No I think this is the right destination" Kirby said.

"If we weren't suppoed to land here then where were we supposed to land?' Pseudonym asked.

"The kingdom not too far from here." Admin explained.

"Wait. So that means….we're going to….." Rydli scratched his head.

"Far…Far Away…" Marrowsky finished.

"ooooooooooooooooohhh fuck you" Grenade said.

"Hey no need to fret, Gre. I'm sure lots of wondrous opportunities await us there" Rydli said.

"I still don't have a shirt on." Grenade reminded him.

"And I gotta say the rumors do not disapprove, you really need to work out you fat piece of shit" Rydli noted.

"Since we don't have enough carriages for everyone, you guys will be acting as the horses for our ride there. First team there gets first pick in the second challenge" Admin instructed everyone.

"Heh. A race. Well I'll be sure to give it my A-game" Gingerale claimed.

"Do we have to? I still have some mud behind my eyelids that I need to finish cleaning" Reu complained.

"No you have 15 seconds" Admin snapped his fingers.

Mike and J were at the front of the line, strapped to each other and holding up the front of the carriage.

"Lemon, want to team?" Jake asked.

"Nah frb fknla" lemon said.

"Lemon's feeling a little lightheaded, he needs someone as strong as me to compensate for his lack of power" Sam said, strapping himself to Lemon.

"I'll be your partner Jake" Nicholas offered.

"Ok…" Jake said, and they strapped together and stoof behind Sam and Lemon, holding onto the bars that help up the carriage.

"No, that's ok. I don't want to team with you. Jake. I'm good." Riley sighed.

"You can be my partner" Robot offered.

"Alright, whatever, even though you're a little wrid" Riley rolled his eyes.

"Thanks you too" Robot responded, picking up the bar.

Blooberri and Berserker stood behind them, and Isaac and Reu behind them.

"Wait, who is my partner?" Gingerale asked.

"Oops, Sorry Gingerale. We don't have an even number…it's ok, you don't have to do much in the back by yourself" Isaac said.

"Whatever" Gingerale sighed, picking up the bar.

Team Jacob lifted the carriage above them and got ready to start racing.

For the Troll Slaiyers, Rydli and Marrowsky were at the front of the line.

"Our athletic abilities will prevail in the end" Rydli said.

"Do you do track?" Marrowsky asked.

"I do everything" Rydli replied.

Joe and Jp were behind them.

"We got this" Jp said.

Behind them were Kirby and Grenade.

"You sure you can handle this after having 25 different people fall on top of you?" Kirby asked him.

"No but with 12 other people also holding the carriage how hard can it be" Grenade said, crying.

Behind them were Cloud and Pantz, Cloud was coughing up dicks.

Behind them were Carz and StarForce.

"It"S THE NUSTACHK it''s THE NUTSHACK" Carz shouted.

"That show made my weiner hard onece' StarForce said.

Behind them were Element and Pseduo.

"PC master race bros" Element said.

"I just hope this doesn't take long I have to take a huge crap" Pseduo said.

"Ok ignore my PC master race bro call whatever…" Element said sadly.

Moogle was in the back alone, holding up the back of the carriage.

Gingerale glanced over from his carriage and greeted Moogle, as they were both in the back of their respected lines.

"Hey Mog" Gingerale said.

Moogle dind't say anything.

"What the chiz jesu" Gingerale stomped angrily.

"This is going to be one internese race" Berserker said.

Both teams got ready, preparing for the start of the race.

"On the count of 666, we will start. Really, 666? Who decided on that number? Imboo was that you? Ok on the cunt of three, one two three" Admin declared, blowing his airhorn.

Who will win this exciting, intense race between the teams? Troll Slaiyers. They won. They got their first.

Troll Slaiyers and Team Jacob arrived at Far Far Away, gazing at the buildings and beautiful skyline.

"It's so magical looking" Kirby swooned.

"Wow, you're right Nicholas. Abortion does lead to more deaths than guns in the US every year." Jake agreed.

"I'm just sayin" Nicholas shrugged.

[Jake in le confession toilet]  
"Wow first he talks about abortions and now he makes a Dragonball pun. Nicholas really does know how to conversate like a pro. I should have been hanging out with him more"  
[le end]

All of the haikuer let go of the carriages except for Grenade, so it fell on top of him.

"So this is Far…Far Away." Jp observed.

"Yes thank you for clarifying the location, Jp. The big giant Hollywood styled sign that spells "Far Far Away" wasn't clear enough" Marrowsky said.

"So what's the second challenge and what benefits do we get?" Moogle asked inpateitnyl.

"Hold your horses, bro" Admin calme.d

"We don't have any horses bitch you made us ride you all the way up here" Element reminded him.

"Yeah you all looked like slaves while doing it it was pretty funny." Admin laughed.

"Anyways, I need to go set up the second challenge. You all stay here while I talk with some of the locals and confirm I can set things up here" Admin told them all.

"Wow you're actually asking permission to set things up here? I kinda just assumed we charged in and fucked shit up wherever we landed" J said.

"Well we usually do that, but Far Far Away isn't a place you fuck around. I gotta make sure we're approved and all" Admin explained, running off and entering a building.

As Admin left, several Team Jacob members took New! Nintendo 3ds' out of their pockets and turned their games on.

"Alright, guys…Link, is in." Reu began, tapping an amiibo on his screen.

"Mhm, well, my girl PEACH, is in." Nicholas added, tapping his amiibo on his screen.

"DK's in dis gon be bananas" Mike continued, tapping his amiibo on his screen.

Jake watched over them all in bewilderment.

"I'm not in?" Jake announced to them.

"You're not in?" Nicholas asked.

"I don't have one of those…" Jake admitted, looking at all of their cool hip NEW! Nintendo 3DS'.

Everyone mumbled in shock over one another.

"I love you, we were shipped together in France, but I don't know if you're ready." Reu admitted, conflicted over his chances.

"It's his time." Nicholas defended Jake.

"Were you ready when I took your FAVORITE princess away from you? No, a-" Mike cut off Nicholas in an attempt to defend himself.

"You know what, I actually didn't make it into the track team that day, so I was kind of upset. It was just a personal thing" Mike told them.

"Doesn't everyone make that?" Nicholas asked.

"You didn't make the-I mean, I made the track team. It's a no cut thing" Jake explained.

"There IS a cut!" Mike said, pointing at himself.

"I GOTTA get one" Jake said.

"Go get your mom, and get one, so you can get in" Mike instructed.

"Alright, I-I gotta go!" Jake said in excitement, leaving the trio to play.

"See ya Nick" Jake waved goodbye.

"Bye Jake" Nicholas responded.

"Wait, why'd he say bye to just you?" Reu asked.

"oo, that could be a nice relationship…" Mike smiled.

"Don't say that dude, that's not funny" Reu scorned.

"Oh my gosh!" Nicholas shunned.

Reu, Nicholas, and Mike returned their attention to their NEW! 3DS'.

[Jake in le confession toilet]  
"Damn, now where am I supposed to get a stupid New 3DS at a place like this…there's gotta be a way…somehow…  
[le end]

Shrek and Donkey were walking back toward his home. Shrek took a bite out of his onion.

"It seems all of those tourists are gone. That's good at least" Shrek said.

"Shrek my man. My man Shrek. Shrek. My. Man. My MAIN man Shrek. My man. Shrek. My Shrek. Man. Can I sleep over?" Donkey asked.

"For the last time, Donkey. We can't have sleepovers since that time those pizzas tried to attack us." Shrek reminded him.

"That wasn't my fauly, Shrek. You know me better than that!" Donkey defended.

"Why don't you just send time with your lovely wife, and I'll spend time with mine. " Shrek encouraged.

"My dear hasn't been feeling up to it lately. She said some people cut her dick off." Donkey explained.

"What. Donkey, why does your wife have a dick?" Shrek asked.

"What does it matter to you, Shrek? She can identify as whatever she wants" Donkey scoffed.

Shrek dropped his onion when he discovered crowds of people surrounding his home.

"Shrek! Shrek! Shrek!" they all chanted.

"GET OUT OF MY SWAMP!" Shrek shreadk.

"Hey Shrek can I have an autrograph?" A little girl asked.

Shrek grabbed the girl and shoved her up his ass before continuing to walk to his house.

"Woww Shrek, when did you get so popular?" Donkey asked.

"I don't know Donkey! It just happened. Suddenly everybody loves me and won't leave me and my beautiful swamp alone." Shrek said.

"Don't you mean you and your beautiful wife?" Donkey asked.

"Who?" Shrek questioned back.

Shrek knocked over the crowds of people into his mudbath.

"Oh gosh darn it now they're going to get their funky human smell all over my bath! This day is ruined!" Shrek shrekplained, taking the girl out from his ass and throwing her at another human.

"What are you going to do, Shrek?" Donkey wondered.

"I warned then, But they didn't listen. I'll have to make sure they never come into my swamp again, the only way I know how" Shrek explained.

"And what is that Shrek? Are you gonna make the swamp stink really bad and make them go away? Because it already smells pretty bad I think you got that down. You could make it pretty ugly and filthy but you already got that down too. You're already pretty gosh darn good at being repulsive Shrek I don't lnow what more you can do!" Donkey wondered.

"Donkey do you ever shut up?" Shrek asked him.

Shrek took a pile of bricks and started piling them up around the border of his house, cementing them together.

"Donkey go get the shreklings. I need help building this." Shrek instructed.

Moogle paced around, waiting for the Admin to come back.

"Alright, guys. So what kind of challenge do you think we're going to be facing? We already have an advantage, so we should put our best efforts into it" Moogle thought.

"Whatever it is just put me in charge and we'll be sure to already have an advantage right away" Rydli advised.

"I don't care about this I was interested when I saw Shrek but now I lost interest again." Cloud admitted.

[Cloud in le confession toilet]  
"Truthfully I couldn't give one shit about this. Whatever the challenge is I'm not going to care. But if we lose nobody will vote for me anyways so it's not like I have to try. It's good to be a relevant haikuer."  
[le end]

"Hey Moogle. Have you ever tried weed?" Pantz asked.

"No and I do not wish to." Moogle informed her.

"Cool." Pantz replied.

"Is that it? There's nothing else you have to say?" Moogle asked.

"Nah" Pantz admitted.

"we weed dinner" Carz said.

"Whatever I need to go use the bathroom, I'll be right back I just need to find someplace that has a bathroom" Mr. Moogle explained to everyone.

"ALRIGHT Mr. MOOGLE NO ONE GIVES A SHIT ABOUT YOUR SHIT" Joe shouted.

"If you do take an ogre shit take a pic though that would be cool" Pantz added.

Mr. Moogle looked at them weirdly and walked away. He walked around the corner of a building, looking for some place that could possibly offer a restroom. As he looked around at the surrounding buildings, he was caught off guard by the voice of someone he walked by.

"Fine, evening, isn't it?" the mysterious person asked him.

"Yeah, sure." Mr. Moogle said, turning to him.

"Moogle, is it? Or do you prefer the full Mr. Moogle?" he asked.

"How do you know my name?" Mr. Moogle asked, puzzled.

The person chuckled. He was wearing a trench coat and a fedora with a piece of note paper stuck on it.

"Let's just say I'm an observer. I've been watching you and your friends. You've been going strong for three seasons, Mr. Moogle. You're not exactly an obscure haikuer. Or are you? There was that time you were placed in the "other" category, after all." The mysterious person reminded him.

Mr. Moogle folded his arms and examined the individual. He couldn't recognize who it was but they seemed familiar.

"I was just wondering if you'd like to answer a few questions regarding Haiku? I was wondering what you thought about the return of Haikik Vs Haiskype?" they asked him, taking out a small notebook and clicking his pen.

"That's over, dude. We're all friends now. No more enemies. Where have you been?" Moogle asked.

"Right. Of course. How silly of me…but may I also ask what you think about the upcoming resurgence of alt accounts?" they continued, circling Moogle.

"Alt accounts are so 2013, we're all past that now. I doubt anyone cares enough to make one now" Moogle answered.

"Oh if only you knew" they said under their breath.

"I'm serious, dude. No one cares anymore. Why are you even asking me these questions?" Moogle asked.

"Please just bear with me, Moogle. I just want some input from one of the most well respected users from the community. I'm also conducting a poll and was curious as to if you are interested in the return of Karkat Vantas Pro Skater" they asked.

"Who are you, exactly? Why are you asking all these questions?" Mr. Moogle asked.

"A friend. A companion. An observer. You can call me, the Haiku Reporter" they told Moogle, walking past him and staring off into the distance.

"What is this all about?" Mr. Moogle asked the reporter.

"I'm just trying to get some information, friend. Stay tuned for the latest Haiku Report" the reporter smiled, tipping his fedora and backing off into the shadows.

"Wait, but who are you?" Mr. Moogle asked.

Mr. Moogle tried to follow the reporter but with that, he had disappeared.

Jake looked around for any sign of a game store.

[Jake in le confession toilet]  
"Ok so I can't afford a NEW 3DS, but I could always just take one and run as fast as I can"  
[le end]

Jake paced back and forth.

"Hey Sam do you have a NEW 3DS?" Jake asked.

"Suck my FUKIN dick bro" Sam ordered.

"I will but that doesn't answer my question. What about you, Berk?" Jake asked.

"I have a 3ds but I've had it for a while." Berserker answered.

"Wait so it it an old 3ds or an old New 3ds?" Jake asked.

"What do you mean?" Berserker asked.

"Bitch don't fuck around is it a New! Old 3ds or an Old original 3ds?" Jake asked.

"Shrwk" Berserker answered.

"Fucking Berk. How am I going to get in…" Jake sighed.

"Doesn't Riley have one?" Blooberri asked.

"He's too busy flirting with girls" Jake explained.

Riley was talking to some of the princesses.

"So, my cock. Pretty big" Riley flirted.

They smacked Riley in the penis and he fell down.

"My cock? Eh, it's ok. But honestly, I'd like to hear about your cock" Rydli flirted to the same girl.

She blushed and giggled at Rydli's romantic gesture.

Someone carrying a box walked up to Team Jacob, holding a box and a Nintendo hat.

"Hey, is anyone here named Drew? We finished repairing their New! Nintendo 3ds and we're here to deliver it to him" the delivery man announced.

"Oh. Yes. I am Drew. That is my 3ds. Thank you for repairing it dawg." Jake informed him, grabbing the box.

"Hold on, squirt. We need to confirm you are Drew. You need to correctly answer the security question Drew left on the New! 3ds" the delivery man explained.

"shit" Jake snapped his finger.

"Yep that was the answer. Here's your 3ds Drew" the delivery man smiled, handing Jake the box.

"Yes! Now I just need an amiibo!" Jake pumped his fist.

"You can steal one from Reu's collection like everyone else did" Lemon suggested.

"Thanks Lem!" Jake smiled.

"Yeah! Theft!" Lemon shouted in glee.

Jake and Lemon jumped up and high fived to theft.

A box of amiibo sat next to Reu.

"Hey guys want to see how I can hack Shrek into my game?" Reu asked.

Mike and Nicholas watched Reu's 3ds as Shrek appeared on the screen.

"Wow cool" Mike said.

"So cool" Reu added.

The 3ds then caught on fire.

"Shit shit shit shit shit" Reu shouted, running away with the 3ds in hand.

"Want to play on my swastika stage?" Nicholas asked Mike.

"You can't make stages on the 3ds version" Mike told him.

"I know I just wanted to say that" Nicholas confessed.

Jake opened up Reu's box of amiibo and surveyed the collection. He picked up the Link amiibo.

"This is the one Reu has…" Jake thought to himself.

"They fight with you!" he thought in excitement.

"I'm stealing one of these!" Jake shouted out loud.

Mike and Nicholas looked over for a moment but didn't care so they returned their attention to their game. Jake looked through the collection again. He noticed the Mario amiibo, but looked over that and saw a Yoshi one instead. He and Yosh's eyes connected and he gazed deeply into the amiibo's eyes.

"Yoshi and Peach together…me and Nicholas, together…" Jake thought to himself.

Jake picked up the Yoshi amiibo and nodded.

"I'm in." he declared, taking the amiibo and walking away.

Then walking back because that's where they were playing.

Reu had returned. He was sitting with Nicholas and Mike in the middle of a heated battle.

"Hey Jake, looks like we have a new player in the ring." Reu greeted.

"Tap em in, Jake 'n bake, let's see what you can do…" Mike said.

Jake tapped his Yoshi amiibo onto his New! 3ds and watched the amiibo appear on in the game.

The four watched as their amiibo fought each other in the game. Link went ahead and immediately started attacking Yoshi.

"Uh oh, Yoshi, don't crack those eggs…" Reu teased.

Link and DK both started attacking Yoshi together.

"owowowowooaoaoaoaa" Mike taunted, imitating a Yoshi.

Nicholas and Reu looked at him in a perplexing gaze over his weird imitation.

"Yoshi is in for a huge world of hurt in 3… 2… 1!" Reu announced.

"Don't…stop…" Nicholas said.

Link smashed Yoshi as hard as he could, throwing him high up and knocking him out.

"Guys, you're all picking on him at once, that's not fair! He hasn't leveled up yet. You see that's the fun part. You'll train him and he'll do better. I'll help you" Nicholas explained to Jake.

"What's the matter, Yoshi? It's too much for you?" Yoshi smugly scoffed.

"I'll be back…" Jake warned, placing his 3ds in his pocket.

"Come on, Yosh. See ya Nick" Jake said, leaving.

"Bye" Nick waved.

"Aren't you gonna go with your boyfriend?" Reu asked Nicholas.

"Yeah. Yeah, that's what I'm doing. Going with my boy-PLAY THE GAME!" Nick yelled back at him.

"Wait you're dating?" Mike asked.

Nicholas and Reu both looked at Mike, unamused.

[Jake in le confession toilet]  
"OK WHATEVER I:M NO TEVEN MSFD WI LF S GONA LIICL THEIR FUCKING ASSDES NEXT TIME A ADASNDAKDBJADBDBSDF maefeaheg. I don't get to practice much because of my stupif fucking internet, I mostly just play against my gay real life friends. But I'll get better and I'll show them, I will be the best…smash bros…player…"  
[le end]

Admin came back from the building.

"Alright guys let's all file in. We're just about ready to start the main challenge" Admin told them all.

Moogle came back.

"Hey." He greeted.

"Hey Mog. Or should I say Mr. Moddle." Element greeted.

"What?" Mr. Moogle asked.

"Anyways, you won't believe this. I ran into some weird guy and he-"

"Sorry I lost interest after "anyways", let's just skip this conversation and get this challenge over with" Cloud advised.

Everyone walked past Moogle and into the building Admin was standing in front of. Gingerale stopped by Moogle.

"Hey Moogle, I'd like to hear about what you found" Gingerale said encouragingly.

"I can't believe literally nobody wants to hear about the reporter" Moogle sighed, ignoring Gingerale and walking into the building.

"WHAT THE heck" Gingerlae said.

Gingerale sighed and followed. All of the Haikuers entered the building and looked around, seeing loads of booths and TVs hanging on the wall.

"OwO what's this?" StarForce asked.

"Welcome, to ComicCon" Admin greeted.

"Really. ComicCon? ComicCon? Of all the things we could have had we decided on ComicCon?" Marrowsky questioned.

"I'm okay with this" Pseudonym admitted.

"Why here though? Why not in California or somewhere that makes sense?" Moogle asked.

"We already have like 4 US locations in our backlog I'm not wasting a trip there just for ComicCon" Admin explained.

"If you told us about this beforehand I would have had time to make a good cosplay" Jp sadly said.

"Never fear, JP. Because you will still get to cosplay. It's required for our challenge, in fact." Admin smiled.

"Omg can I cosplay as Shrek" Mike asked.

"No. Because today's challenge is a free-for-all game of Super Smash Bros. You all will use an amiibo on this special gamepad, enchanted by the magic godfather. After tapping the amiibo, you will gain all of the moves and powers of the character and become fully dressed in their attire as well. The game is pretty straightforward. We contemplated a tourney styled bracket but instead decided on a complete brawl between everyone at once." Admin explained.

"Don't say Brawl" Rydli scoffed.

Imboo demonstrated by tapping an amibo on the gamepad sitting on a podium. Imboo turned into a full Wolf cosplay as Wolf appeared on the gigantic screen behind him.

"And that's what it would look like if Wolf was in Smash 4" Admin explained.

Imboo ran off crying.

"omg kreygasm" Cloud said.

[Cloud in le confession toilet]  
"FINALLY a challenge I can get behind. I have never lost a Haiku Smash tourney so I got this in the bag. Finally, finally, I can actually care about a challenge here. I'm going to kick boobs"  
[le end]

"Ok so let me get this straight. We arrived in Shrek's swamp only to find out the challenge actually takes place in Far Far Away, only to find out the challenge actually takes place at a conveniently nearby placed ComicCon, only to find out the challenge isn't really related to ComicCon but is about Smash Bros instead?" Marrowsky recapped.

"Yes." Admin said.

"Alright I'm in" Marrowsky shrugged.

"What if we don't have an amiibo?" Kirby asked.

"You have 10 minutes before we start. They're probably selling some at nearby booths. Use this time to get any amiibo you can. Also I only want one character per haikuer, so make sure your selection is unique. For this reason, I advise having at least 3 choices so you don't run into a conflict with someone else who has the same main." Admin advised.

"Screw amiibo hunting I can use this time to see the Thor 3 trailer at their panel" Jp said.

"lol people like the Thor movies" Moogle added.

Team Jacob got into their huddle.

"OK. We all know that's going to happen. We're all going to get our asses kicked one way or another and it'll be down to Mike and Cloud. Mike do NOT choke. You weed to beat Cloud." Nicholas advised.

"Do your best Mike, no pressure" Lemon said.

"Lemon shove a dick in your mouth and grow some balls. We can't be sissies about this" Nicholas warned.

"What about Robot? She's pretty good" Lemon suggested.

"Hey, that's pretty good" Riley joked.

"Never utter that sentence ever again." Sam warned.

"Here's why we should trust Robot (we shouldn't)" Nicholas said.

"I'm not that good at Smash, guys. I'd just bring you down..." Robot said nervously.

"Nonsense. You're one of the best players I've fought. You've never been in a tourney; you could do really well" Lemon said encouragingly.

"Hey Lemon your vagina is showing" Sam said.

"It's not even in a bracket format why are we even treating this like it will end up the same?" Jake asked.

"Because you're gay" Sam reminded him.

"Didn't think about it that way…" Jake admitted.

[Gingerale in le confession toilet]  
"I got this. I'll show my excellent Smash skills and people will notice how useful I am once more. The Ginge Redeems Himself"  
[le end]

Shrek cemented the last brick and wiped some sweat off his forehead.

"wew lad, we did it Donkey. We finished." Shrek joyously observed.

Shrek and Donkey were standing on top of their large wall surrounding Shrek's swamp.

"With this huge wall covering my swamp, nobody will be able to bother us ever again." Shrek said.

The dragon then crashed into the wall, causing the entire thing to shatter and collapse. Shrek and Donkey emerged from the rubble.

"DONKEY! WHAT WAS THAT ALL ABOUT?!" Shrek shouted.

"Sorry, Shrek. I guess without her penis she's very disjointed. Like cats without their whiskers" Donkey guessed.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Shrek screamed.

More tourists started showing up and entering his swamp.

"Hey Shrek can you fart on my onion for me?" Someone asked.

"Hey Shrek sign my Smash Mouth CD?" Someone else asked.

"Shrek omg its you you were my first crush" A girl blushed.

The Haikuers all got ready for their Smash-off. Amiibo in hand, the two teams lined up in front of the gamepad podium. Admin was in front of them all.

"Alright, one person from each team will come up one at a time and select their character with the amiibo they have. No duplicates, so if someone chose your main, choose someone else. Once everyone is in the game, you will have all-out free-for-all. One stock each. Last team standing wins. Let's go." Adimn said.

"unf. My dick is ready for this" Cloud said, popping a boner.

The Haikuers were lined up in their respective teams. In front of Team Jacob's line was J, while Cloud was at the front of le Troll Slaiyers.

[Cloud in le confession toilet]  
"I'm ready to whip my dick out and play with myself as I kick some of these fools ass"  
[le end]

[J in le confession toilet]  
"I have no idea what I'm doing"  
[le end]

"J, you get the first pick on the roster. Who will it be?" Admin asked him.

J walked up to the enchanted gamepad holding his Link amiibo.

"I've always liked Link ever since I was a kid" J explained.

"J you are still a child" Admin reminded him.

"Don't label me bitch you're just like those counselors who "diagnosed" me as autistic. Anyways Link is my dude, sorry for picking him first!" J apologized with a weeb bow.

"Oh man I'm so disappointed J got link, he was such a high demand character" Psuedonym sighed.

J tapped his amiibo on the gamepad and started spinning around. He spun around as Link's clothes enveloped on his body, and a hylian shield and master sword materialized in both his hands. Finally, a cap was formed on his head. J looked at his body in excitement.

"Whoa this is so cool, this is like some kind of drug trip" J laughed.

"J do you have experience with cocaine?" Admin sighed.

"Oh no, I would die if I tried cocaine because I'm a mutant" J explained.

Imboo punched J out of the way.

"Alright alright next already!" Imboo said.

Cloud walked up to the enchanted gamepad next.

"Now you may be wondering, Cloud? You are good at every character! Who in Far Far Away will you ever choose? Well here I am to answer that question. While yes, I have shown proficiently with the likes of Diddy and Dr. Mario, -"

"No one cares" Element yelled out.

"FUCK YOU ELEMNTR PICECE OF SHIT KILL YOUSELF YOU ENTITLED DICKQAD AAAAAAAAH. Anyways I have decided to stay true to my beloved waifu. That's right, I'm going Palutena." Cloud said, tapping his Palutena amiibo on the gamepad.

Cloud spun around as a long, flowing green wig emerged on his head, a white dress and brown-covered footing materialized on his body, with some jewelry and a shield on his right arm. Finally, his staff appeared and his breasts were largely increased.

"I have the weirdest boner right now." Mr. Moogle announced looking down.

"Alright. Next up?" Admin asked the lines.

J and Cloud stood on opposite sides of the space between the lines and the gamepad's podium as Gingerale and Rydli walked up next.

"Yo Rydli. My man. How's it going?" Gingerale asked with a wave.

Rydli was too preoccupied looking into a hand mirror and perfecting his hair.

"Whatever" Gingeale sighed, slamming his Bayonetta amiibo onto the gamepad.

"Let's dance, boys!" he chanted as he dawned Bayonetta's outfit.

Sexy Gingernetta walked out in high heels, giving a wink out to the crowds.

"Rydli, you're next my man" Admin reminded him.

Rydli walked up and took a glimpse at the screen.

"Wait, Smash 4? What the hell is this? Not Melee? You do know Melee is the objectively superior game right? Why are we wasting time on a trashy game like this?" Rydli complained, putting his hands on his hips.

"Because I thought it would be more fun to have more than 7 characters fighting" Admin explained nervously.

"Wow what a casual remark. You should have just saved this for the final 7 then. Whatever, I accept this challenge" Rydli announced.

"It wasn't…optional.." Admin scratched his head.

"I'll be going with my Fire Emblem favorite of course." Rydli said, taking his amiibo out.

"oo. Robin maybe? Or Ike? Or are you going Marth?" Admin asked.

"Screw them Lucina all the way you pleb." Rydli said, tapping his amiibo on the gamepad and dawing Lucina's outfit, small breasts, and luxurious hair.

"Ok seriously guys stop this, me and my boner are having very conflicting views on this" Mr. Moogle begged.

[Rydli in le confession toilet]  
"I see Cloud has chosen the beta waifu, Palutena. I remember back in HDA when he tried to take my waifu away from me. And look where he is now…pathetic…I will prove once and for all Lucina is not only MY waifu, but the BEST waifu…wait a minute why am I doing this I have a girlfriend…oh well it's still fun to dick around with Cloud's dignity"  
[le end]

J dressed as Link was joined by Gingerale as Bayonteaa, and Cloud dressed as Palutena was joined by Rydli as Lucina.

"And surprisingly J is the only one not cross dressing. Let's see who are next competitors will pick. Nicholas and Jp, CHOOSE YOUR FIGHTER" Admin screamed in a high-pitched girly scream attempting to imitate the announcer.

"Wow, what was that?" Jp asked.

"I'm…" Admin said.

"Leave the announcing for the announcers" Jp said.

Nicholas walked up to the gamepad with his amiibo, a blood-covered Pikachu.

"Interesting choice, Nicholas. I didn't know you were into edgy 13-year-old creepypasta OCs." Admin said.

"It was the only amiibo of Pikachu I could find" Nicholas sighed.

"Wait, doesn't that belong to-" Admin began.

"It belongs to a horrible person who is hopefully hanging by a noose as we speak, but it's the only amiibo of Pikachu I have so I need to use it" Nicholas explained.

"Wait, did Shinxy give that to you? Like as a figt? Aw…" Admin daww'd.

Nicholas ripped the gamepad off the podicum and cracked it against Admin's head, causing the gamepad to break in half and Admin to collapse unconsciously.

20 minutes later…

"Ok we're back with a new gamepad after our last was destroyed by Nicholas. Who in fact did pick Pikachu." Admin recapped.

Nicholas was standing with his team, smaller than the rest, wearing a Pikachu fursuit.

"Pika!" he screamed.

"Is he supposed to be smaller because he just seems like his usual size?" Jp noticed.

"Yeah but it appears Nicholas is already the size of a Pikachu" Admin explained.

"Fair enough" Jp shrugged, tapping the Shulk amiibo Stickboy got her onto the gamepad, dawing a full Shulk cosplay.

"eh feling it" Jp said, joining the Troll Slaiyers.

Jake and Kirby were the next in line.

"Now to choose my main…that's right, I'm going with my classic….Pink Yosh!" Jake declared, slamming his Yoshi amiibo on the gamepad and turning into a Yoshi.

"Yoshi Yoshi" Jake said, jumping up and down.

"Ok the imitations aren't really necessary" Pseudonym noted.

"Really Madorky? Yoshi is my main. You can't be the Yoshi of Haiku if I am! Gee wiz.." Moogle sighed, snapping his fingers.

"Haha Yoshi is cool. This should be fun" Kirby smiled.

"So who are you picking, Kirby?" Admin asked.

"Kirby!" Kirby said, picking Kirby and dawining Kirby PJs.

"Wow Kirby pick Kirby who would have thunk?" Marrowsky noticed.

"Wait a minute, I thought we won the last challenge?" Rydli remembered.

"Yeah, and?" Admin asked, not understanding why Rydli was being a little bitch.

"Didn't we get first picks on the characters since we won?" Rydli asked.

Admin looked at the screen and then at both of the teams.

"Oh. Well shit. I fucked that up. Troll Slaiyers get first pick from here on out!" Admin announced.

"wtf this is bs" Cloud complained.

"You got the character you want though" Kirby said.

"I know but I like busting the Admin's balls" Cloud replied.

"Fuck off Cloud" Admin said.

"BULLYING! BULLYING! OH SHIT OH SHIT It's time I call the BULLYING police on you racist motherfuckers" Cloud said.

Imboo sprayed pepper spray in Cloud's eyes to shut him up, Cloud fell on the ground clinching his eyes and screaming.

"There, now that we have some pace. Psuedonyfnrkgnaksjfbkaslf and Mike have some characters to pick" Admin returned to the characrjgalkfbaiufgielFNELIAFB.

"Hmm…, I think I will go with Greninja" Pseduo said, taking the amiibo out and placing it on the gamepad.

"Why did you have a long pause as if you were trying to decide on who to pick even though you already had the amiibo of the character you were choosing in your hand?" Kirby asked as Pseudo dressed in a Greninja…wesuit walked over.

"Boy you're just cock full of questions today, aren't you?" Rydli asked Gluvr.

"You mean chock?" Gluvr wondered.

Rydli sighed.

"I forgot Greninja was even in this game" StarForce admitted.

Mike placed his Zelda amiibo on the gamepad, growing a gown and brunette hair.

"E[ic" J said.

"Really, you're gonna go with Zelda? But she sucks" Sam said from the Team Jacob line.

"Mike's a mastermind of the low-tiers. He will kick some booty" Jake explained.

"Tiers are for queers as they say dB" Mike reassured.

Berserker and Marrowsky were up next.

"It's been a while since I've played this. But hopefully I can remerge as good as I once was" Marrowsky said, tapping a Lucario amiibo on the gamepad. He was enveloped by a full Lucario fursuit.

"Between the skills of Cloud, Rydli, and I, we cannot be stopped" Marrowsky said, folding his arms to look cool.

"Is it me or does Marrowsky look reeeeeeeeally hot in that Lucario costume?" J whispered to his team.

"It's just you" everyone said back except for Jake, who said "yeah". Then everyone looked at Jake.

"Smash sucks" Berserker declared.

"Nice input Berk now tap dat amib"

"It's Berserker….not Berk…" Berserker said to him

"What?" Admin asked.

"My name. Is Berserker." Berserker repeated.

Berserker tapped his Samus amiibo on the gamepad and the varia suit fully materialized around him.

"Ah Berk choosing the Metroid path, as he is, in fact, a fan of the roids. Interesting choice" Jake said.

"Can we get a team of people who don't choose terrible characters?" Sam groaned.

"Hey f u buddy Zelda and Samus are great" Mike defended.

[Berserker in le confession toilet]  
"Ever since Noah got to wear the varia suit back on Haiku Drama Island I've been waiting for the day to come where I can be in the suit too…it just sucks it had to be a SMASH challenge….how do I poop from this thing anyways? Am I supposed to take it off? The bathroom is so small, it's kinda tight trying to…eh…rghn…."  
Berserker tried to take his suit off but bumps into the walls.  
"Oh well I'll just poop in the suit"  
[le end]

Blooberri, Moogly Woogly, you are next." Admin said without the first quotation mark.

Blooberri skated her way up the podium, shredding some epic grinds. Moogle walked up casually.

"Alright Mr. Mog, first choice to you" Admin informed.

"Well Chuck, I think I'll go with My main, Yoshi." Mr. Moogle delightfully chose, holding his amiibo.

"That was taken" Admin reminded him.

"Yeah fag" Jake shouted.

"What the frick. Alright, fine. I'll go with Shulk." Moogle changed his mind, taking Shulk out of his pocket.

"Also taken. By your own team member in fat. Pay attention" Admin sighed.

"UGH. FINE. Then I have no choice. WHERE'S CORN?!" Mooogle impatiently shouted.

"Well I have a Corn amiibo but I don't think I should-" Reu started before being punched in the face by Moogle.

Moogle took the amiibo and slammed it off the enchanted gamepad, turning into Corrin.

"I choose the path to smash!" Moogle said.

"Fates sucked" Cloud said.

"You only think that because they removed the Fire Emblem-amie" Moogle countered.

"Hey Moog maybe you can turn in2 a dragon and you can have some kinky rp with I, the GingeraleDragon haha" Gingerale joked.

Moogle didn't respond and joined his team.

[Gingerale in le confession toilet]  
"I haven't played that weeb shit I just wanted to make a joke to connect with my bro….guess it didn't work…"  
[le end]

"And as for Bloo…?" Admin continued.

"I'll go with Zero Suit Samus. She's pretty cool." Blooberri smiled, tapping the amiibo to the gamepad and dawning the zero suit. Her pony tail turned blonde and she gew the goots.

"Choosing the top tiers I see" Rydli sighed.

"Nah I just think she's cool" Bloo shrugged.

Lemon and Joe walked up next. Joe did an le emo sigh.

"So who will it be, JoeMAMA" Admion asked.

"You ok there Julie?" Lemon asked with a concerned glance.

"Lemon don't engage with the enemy, remember what we said, grow a penis" Nicholas reminded him.

Joe reached into her pocket and pulled out a Ness amiibo. Joe copied the stance and pointed at the screen.

"nice choice" Admin said as Joe tapped the amiibo on the gamepad.

Joe spun around as the Ness attire enveloped onto her, she spawned a blue hoodie with a white shirt, some black shorts and skeletal body parts. She smiled at the rest of the kuers.

48pnagiuv/tumblr_inline_nxj0xicorj1rsvea1_540_by_

"Hey Ness" everyone greeted.

"Hey" Joe waved to everyone.

"Sans is Ness Sans is Ness Sans is Ness Sans is Ness" Carz shouted over and over again, jumping up and down from the Troll Slaiyers line.

[Mike in le confession toilet]  
"Sans is Ness sounds like something you'd find on the walls of a mental institution written in feces"  
[le end]

"And as for me, I'll go with my bro, King DeDeDe " Lemon said, taping his ammibo to the gkermapd.

Lemon got fat and turned in2 a penguin with a large hammer.

"Wow Lemon is fat" J said.

Sam and StarForce walked up next.

"Hiya" StarForce greeted, giving out a handshake for a playful greeting.

"EAT SHIT AND DIE I AM GOING TO KICK YOUR FUCKING ASS INTO OBLIVION" Sam screeched, grabbing StarForce's hand and whipping him onto the ground, then bodyslamming him.

StarForce crawled up to the gamepad and tapped a Mario amiibo onto it. StarForce then dawned the plumber's red hat, blue overalls, black moustache and brown shoes.

"So Sam, who will you be picking?" Admin asked curiously.

"I'm not picking no shitty fucking pussy character, I'm going to choose someone who represents my epic and notorious skills. The only character who is as skillful and masterful as me is Villager" Sam explained, tapping the aforementioned character's amiibo onto the gamepad and receiving the Villager's basic clothes.

"Fuck yeah" Sam said, joining the Team Jacob side of the area.

Riley and Carz, the two nobody cares about, walked up next.

Carz chose Pac-Man. He wakka wakka's his way over to his team, chomping on Pantz's head.

"I'M GONNA NUT" Carz shouted.

"Hm, well. I am most experienced with Sonic. And since he is my favorite Sonic character, I think I'm going to go with Sonic. You may be surprised by this choice because I seem like more of a Gears of War guy, but I am in fact a Sonic the Hedgehog fan." Riley explained.

"They should have added ME into this game, inconceivable they would add a Duck and a Dog but not the Ultimate Lifeform" Shadow complained from Riley's backpack.

"SHADOW, geez, you're making me look uncool in front of the guys…sorry everyone, Shadow's just a little jelly, he doesn't seem to understand his character is only wanted by losers and weirdos. Anyways gotta go fast!" Riley chuckled.

Riley put on his hedgehog hat and red and white shoes. He started running in circles before joining his team, next to Jake.

"They better not mess with us. We are unpenertatable! It's not use" Riley said, high fiving Jake but Jake used his tongue.

Robot and Element were up next.

[Element in le confession toilet]  
"Just warning everyone. I'm more of a Killer Instinct and Street Fighter kinda guy. I haven't played Smash in a while.  
[le end]

"Alright, lelelment, who will it be?" Admin asked.

"Well I guess Roy was one of my mains, so I'lll go with him" Element decided, tapping the amiibo on the gamepad and growing red hair, Roy's slick clothes and cape and a nice sword of seals.

"Good choice Element. Now we can be the Kekking Fire Emblem Bros" Rydli said joyfully.

"Why Kekking?" Element asked, joining the team and standing next to Rydli and Moogle, dressed appropriately as Lucina and Corrin.

"Kek" Rydli explained.

"Oh hmmm, I wonder who Robot is going to choose" Jake wondered.

"Isn't it kind of obvious?" Robot wondered back.

"Yes that is why I wondered so loudly." Jake explained.

Robot shrugged, using her R.O.B. amiibo to transform into the robot even though she was already a robot.

Robot beeped and rolled over to the rest of the team.

"Hey Robot have you fucked any of your R.O.B. toys?" Nicholas asked.

"What, no…why?" Robot asked in shock.

"Just wondering" Nick admitted.

[Robot in le confession toilet]  
"I've always loved R.O.B. Since Brawl. I have toys, plushies, multiple of both versions of his amiibo, he's just so awesome. Finally, my time has come to prove my adoration for the character. Hopefully the others don't make fun of me though…it is kinda the biggest thing I'm known for here, so I might geek out a little…  
[le end]

Reu and Grenade, walked up.

Grenade tapped a Wii Fit Trainer amiibo, putting on the exercising outfit.

"Wow, strange choice." Admin noticed.

"Well I need some intuitive to get fit, and I think playing as a trainer for the day could help me accomplish that" Grenade explained.

"Why'd you choose the female version?" Reu asked, staring at Grenade's boobs.

Grenade remained silent.

"Why….did you choose the female version?" Reu repeated.

"I'll see you in the arena" Grenade told him, jogging over to his team.

"Well Reu, you do have a pretty hefty amiibo collection, of all the ones, which one did you end up deciding on?" Admin asked.

Reu placed his amiibo on the gamepad and grew the karate uniforn, a black belt and red headband around his hair, and some fingerless red gloves. He took a fighting stance, posing as the character RRYYYYYYYYYYYUUUUUUUU.

"Hey a character from a viable fighting game" Element pointed out.

"Damn Reyu has some nice abs 0_0" Isaac said.

"And that leaves the final member from each team, we got Pantz and Isaac." Admin finished off..

The two walked up to the podium, standing side by side.

"So, does it suck to have to have the final pick?" Admin asked them.

"Eh, I don't really care. I wouldn't want to take one of my team member's choices. And no one usually picks my character anyway" Isaac explained.

"Yeah and I don't really play Smash so I don't care. I'll just go with Ganondude" Pantz shrugged, tapping Ganondorf on the enchanted gamepad. Pantz grew his clothes and cape shoes and stuff and hair black nigger face.

Isaac put the final amiibo on the gamepad, choosing Pit. Isaac grew wings and a divine piece of clothing appeared on his body, as well as the materialization of sandals and his bow

"The fight is on!" Isaac cheered.

"Outdated line o3o" Mike rolled his eyes.

Isaac walked over to Team Jacob, finishing off both lines.

"Wow I guess Mega Man got shafted over all the third-party characters" Jake said.

"Well there's also Cloud" Reu reminded him.

"One Cloud is too many" Jake said.

"Alright so that completes the roster. To recap, for Team Jacob we have J playing as Link, Gingerale as Bayonetta, Nicholas as Pikachu, Jake as Yoshi, Mike as Zelda, Berserker as Samus, Blooberri as Zero Suit Samus, Lemon as King Dedede, Sam as Villager, Robot as R.O.B., Reu as Ryu, and Isaac as Pit.  
Alternatively, Troll Slaiyers has Cloud playing as Palutena, Rydli as Lucina, Jp as Shulk, Kirby as Kirby, Pseudonym as Greninja, Marrowsky as Lucario, Mr. Moogle as Corrin, Joe as Ness, StarForce as Mario, Carz as Pac-Man, Element as Roy, Grenade as Wii Fit Trainer, and Pantz as Ganondorf.  
Everyone has one stock. Get knocked out you are out of the game. Friendly fire is on. Once a team is fully knocked out, they lose." Admin explained.

"Question" Jp raised her hand.

"No questions faggots just play. 3, 2, 1, GO!" Admin screamed.

"So wait do we just go at it now or?" Kirby asked before Lemon struck them with his giant ass King Dedede hammer. Kirby was squashed onto the floor. Trying to stand up Lemon rushed the hammer into Gluvr and twirled his hammer repeatedly until Gluvr was knocked back and smashed against a wall, falling flat on their face.

"Fuck off Lem" Joe said, striking him with a baseball bat.

Lemon flew in the opposite direction, back towards where he came from. Sam came flying over riding a lloid rocket. Joe swung her bat again and sent Sam riding in the opposite direction.

"Oh shit shit shit shit shiiiiiiiiit" Sam shrieked as he flew into Berserker and Reu and exploded.

Jake looked over at Nick, Mike, and Reu, dressed as Pikachu, Zelda, and Ryu respectively,

"Hey wait a minute. I'm the only one who used my amiibo. You all used different characters!" Jake noticed.

"Yeah. So? We don't have to main our amiibo" Reu shrugged.

"RYU LOOK OUT" Jake shouted in terror.

"Actually you can just call me Reu" Reu commanded.

"It's pronounced the same way who cares, just LOOK OUT" Jake shouted again.

"Actually, it-AAAAAAA" Reu screamed as Carz was gobbling on his neck. Reu ran around in circles as Carz as Pac-Man nibbled on his neck "wakka wakka wakka suck my dick".

Nicholas summoned a thunderbolt on Reu, causing him to fall backwards and knock Carz off his shoulder. He then scurried over and did a short jump and twirled completely, smacking Carz with his tail. Carz threw a strawberry at Nicholas, splashing across his face.

"you bitch" Nicholas yelled.

Reu stood up, stars orbiting around his head. He confusedly walked away from the fight in search of a safe zone.

Berserker, dressed as Samus, dashed towards the opposing side. He shot out a super missile at Pantz, Ganondorf, who it hit with such little impact that Pantz didn't even flinch. Berserker then began charging his charge beam

[Berserker in le confession toilet]  
"I'm not a huge Smash fan. I've barely played it since I got it. But if there's one thing I know, it's Metroid. So, I'm sure I will do fine"  
[le end]

Berserker released his charge beam. Pantz used a shield to block it. Then slightly punched Berserker and sent him flying miles away. Berserker cracked against the wall of the building so hard he burst right through it.

"Whoa, Ganondorf is cool" Pantz smiled, looking at her powerful hands.

"And Berserker is the first one out. Team Jacob is down to 12, Troll Slaiyers 13. Also thanks Pantz for creating some blastzones" Admin said, giving a thumbs up.

"Fuck Smash I wish this was Metroid" Berserker shouted, taking the helmet of his varia suit off and slamming it off the ground.

"Whoa, Samus is a dude?" a tourist noticed.

"No." Berserker responded.

"I can't believe this. It's such a twist. All my life I thought Samus was a girl, but in fact, she's actually a guy!" he said in excitement.

"Have you ever played a Metroid game? Ever beaten one?" Berserker asked.

"This is so amazing, I should give my idea to the Game Theorists and they can make a video about how Samus was actually a guy all along" the tourist said excitedly, running away.

Ding!

"It's that time again!" Admin declared.

"Lemon did your vagina start bleeding?" Nicholas asked.

"No, silly. Lemon's vagina is fine. It's time for the song! Everyone sing-a-long as you bash each other's fucking skulls in!" Admin ordered.

"Do I still have to sing?" Berserler asked.

"Just sing a line or two it won't kill you" Admin scoffed.

"Ugh" Berserker grofed.

[Song 19 – Smash 4 Mouth]  
The Smash 4 theme kicks in.

The Haikuers get into their battle stances and stare each other down as the Smash 4 menu theme's main chorus kicks in.

Mr. Moogle: Here we go  
Rydli: It's time  
Element: We're gonna, kick some ass now  
Jp: Playing as our favorite characters

Mike: Although,  
Nicholas: We're subline  
Lemon: It's about, knowing your opponent  
Sam: And being ready for whatever occurs

Jake: I've played since I was a kid  
J: I'll admit, I'm new to the series  
Blooberri: That's ok  
Isaac: It's alright  
Reu: Smash is, for everyobody  
Robot: Casual or competitively

StarForce: I, will, never, give up  
Pantz: Even if, we're low in the tiers  
Grenade: Come on  
Pseudonym: Let's fight  
Kirby: No matter, who it is, we'll be ready  
Marrowsky: For, an-y-thing

Riley: I have been practicing all night  
Gingerale: I got my main, I'm prepared to fight  
Berserker: I am having fun, I have delight  
Joe: That's right  
Carz: I like, Wario's bike

Cloud jumps in holding Palutena's staff to his mouth like a microphone and wearing a nice pair of shades. The music cuts off and changes to All-Star.

Cloud: HEY NOW

YOU'RE AN ALL STAR

GET YOUR GAME ON

GO PLAY

HEY NOW

YOU'RE A ROCK STAR

GET THE SHOW ON

GET PAID

Crowd: ALL THAT GLITTERS IS GOLD

Cloud: ONLY SHOOTING STARS BREAK THE MOLD

(still singing to the All-star theme)

Jp: God damn it Cloud, you're singing it wrong  
Mr. Moogle: We're trying to sing to Smash, you got the other song  
Rydli: Damn it now we're singing, to, the rhythm  
Lucario: Following the All-Star algorithm

Jake: Smash Mouth's cool, just like an onion  
Riley: Maybe but a parody is a little redundant

Gingerale: Ok guys, this is getting kinda forced  
Isaac: I think I'd like it if we got back to the chorus

Cloud: HEY NOW

YOU'RE AN ALL STAR

GET YOUR GAME ON

GO PLAY

Team Jacob: HEY NOW

IT'S A SMASH SONG

THIS ISN'T ALL-STAR

GO AWAY

Cloud: ALL THAT GLITTERS IS GOLD

Team Jacob: ALL STAR PAORDIES ARE GETTING OLD

(Back to the beginning of the Smash 4 menu theme)

StarForce: Fireball,  
Cape and FLUDD  
Super jump, I am Mario  
With basic attacks, I'm easy to grasp

J: Bow and arrow,  
Boomerang,  
Bombs and hook-shot in my arsenal  
Playing as Link is always a blast

Jp: The future, I see it  
Shulk is a pleasant surprise  
I'm feeling it, with his changing stats,  
I can change the dynamic, and future

Robot: R O B is my love  
Maining him ever since Brawl

Kirby: Kirby, can copy

Riley: Yoshi, can egg

Grenade: Who even thought of Wii Fit…..Trainer, really

Reu: I play the skillful fighter Ryu

Rydli: Sit down swordsman, I'm with waifu

Nicholas: I'm best with the electrical Pikachu  
It's true  
I do, like my chu

(Alternating between the All-Star and Smash 4 menu theme)

Cloud: HEY NOW

YOU'RE AN ALL STAR

GET YOUR GAME ON

GO PLAY

Pseudonym: I know, he's lost his place, but I still like to play as Greninja

Mike: Din's fire, Nayru's love, she's not good but I love Zelda

Cloud: HEY NOW

YOU'RE A ROCK STAR

GET THE SHOW ON

GET PAID

Carz: Wakka Wakka-Wakka

Villager: It's fun pocketing as Villager

Cloud: ALL THAT GLITTERS IS GOLD

Pantz: Ganon's powerful but slow

Riley: You are too slow

Cloud: ONLY SHOOTING STARS BREAK THE MOLD

(Sticking to Smash 4 menu theme now)

Mr. Moogle: Let's go  
Corrin  
You got  
Blood of a dragon

Lemon: I main  
Dedede  
He's silly  
And his hammer's slammin, all my foes away

All: DA-DA-DA-DA

Troll Slaiyers: Here we go  
It's time  
We're gonna, kick some ass now  
Playing as our favorite characters

Team Jacob: Although  
We're subline  
It's about, knowing your opponent  
And being ready for whatever occurs

(All-Star kicks in again)

Cloud: Well, the Bayos start coming and they don't stop coming  
Back to the friendlies, and I tripped to the ground running  
Didn't make sense not to play for fun  
Your tactics get good, but your execution is dumb  
So many to play, so many to defeat  
So what's wrong with living a neet  
You'll never know if you don't try  
All: Try!  
You'll never shine with an AI

(Smash 4 menu theme)

All: I have been practicing all night  
I got my main, I'm prepared to fight  
I am having fun, I have delight  
That's right  
I like, Wario's bike

(All-Star)

All: HEY NOW

YOU'RE A SMASH STAR

GET YOUR MAIN ON

GO, FIGHT

HEY NOW

HAW HAW

WETTING YOUR BED BRO?

JUST KIDDING, SIKE

ALL THAT GLITTERS IS GOOOOLD

ONLY SHOOTING STARS BREAK THE MOLD

ALL THAT GLITTERS IS GOOOOLD

ONLY SHOOTING STARS BREAK THE MOLD

[le big finish]

[J in le confession toilet]  
"Link is cool and all but I wish he wore sandals, these boots are genuinely uncomfortable"  
[le end]

"Link is cool and all but I wish he wore sandals, these boots are genuinely uncomfortable" J explained to Nick.

"Yes J, you have said that about 3 times now." Nicholas reminded him.

"Oh, srry. Hey Lemon" J waved, running up to him.

"Hey J." Lemon greeted.

"Link is cool and all but I wish he wore sandals, these boots are genuinely uncomfortable" J admitted to Lemon.

"O" Lemon said.

"Do Kirby characters even wear shoes or are those their feet?" J asked, looking down at Lemon.

"I…don't know…" Lemon said, looking at his feet.

"OH MY HOD It's MARR MAR" J shrieked in excitement, seeing Lucario the Marrowsky walking by from across the way.

"MARROWSKY~ GET OVER HERE!" J screamed in a malicious voice, shooting his hookshot out.

The hookshot latched onto Marrowsky and retracted, sending him into J's arms.

"Opps, how do I let go?" J asked, throwing Marrowsky up at the ceiling.

Marrowsk's back cracked against the ceiling and he fell back on the ground, landing on the ground harshly.

"I'm sorry Marr Marr! Let me help you out!" J said, lending Marrowsky a hand and accidently hurling him at the ceiling again.

Marrowsky's body created a larger dent in the ceiling before he was sent back down and crashed off the floor.

"Opps! Sorry Marr…" J cried.

"It's ok, Jonah" Marrowsky coughed, trying to regain himself.

"I love your character! Lucario is so cute! Riolu too…." J said.

[Cloud in le confession toilet]  
"Honestly I have no idea how Lucario even stayed in Smash. Same with Charizard. It's not like their secondary mascots of the franchise at this point, there are tons of other Pokemon that could have easily replaced them, but whatever"  
Cloud shrugged.  
[le end]

"Thanks, Jonah. I also like Wolf, but he isn't a choice this time." Marrowsky explained.

"Ha, furry. It's funny how in Smash we have such dangerously sharp objects and we can be evenly matched with people who can only punch and kick, haha. It genuinely amazes me how I can have such a sharp and deadly sword and it only knocks you back a bit if I strike you with it, haha" J said, demonstrating by hitting Marrowsky with his master sword. The sword dug deep into Marrowsky's chest.

"Oh…shit" J exclaimed.

J tried taking the master sword out but it was lodged deep into Marrowsky's chest, coming out the other side of his body. Marrowsky winced as J put his boot on Marrowsky's stomach pushing him back to get the sword out. Marrowsky's eyes grew tired, he coughed a bit as J slowly pulled the sword out. Marrowsky collapsed on the ground with a huge bloody hole in his chest.

"I'm sorry Marr Marr! It was an accident! OOPS! AAAA. Ok maybe I shouldn't be touching you with my dangerous abilities" J admitted, running away.

Reu wobbled his way to a booth

"Ugh, my head" Reu grumbled, holding onto his head with one hand and the table of the booth with the other.

Reu looked up and saw Caesar slurping a Slurpee.

"CAESAR. It's you" Reu said in excitement, his eyes glowing like anime weeb.

"Oh goddamit this guy again..I mean, oh, hey. Reu. You ran into me. Again." Caesar greeted.

"Caesar look, I'm in a heated battle right now. I could use your help" Reu requested.

"Against the pillar men? Yeah ok sure. Whatever. Is that Alice person still there?" Caesar asked.

"It's Jake now. Just roll with it. But yeah, he's on my team. We could use your help" Reu demanded.

"Alright fine. If beautiful woman are there. And also I like your headband. Taking inspiration from me I see Caesar noticed.

"No, it's from a Fighting game, but whatever let's just go" Reu said, grabbing Caesar's hand and trying to walk away but not moving at all because he isn't strong enough to drag Caesar.

"Ok, but wait. Reu, I think it's time I told you why my boss instructed me to check out you and your friends." Caesar began.

"Why?" Reu asked.

"We discovered a Joestar when we examined your team." Caesar confessed,

"Oh my Dio." Reu said, shitting his pants.

Grenade was doing push-ups, and then stretching his legs. He then started stretching his arms.

"Grenade are you even paying attention to the game?" Jp asked.

"I'm getting fired up" Grenade said, jumping up and performing a jackknife.

Jp visioned the future, foreseeing an attack. Jp turned around to see Riley dashing towards her.

Jp dodged out of the way and then struck Riley dressed as Sonic the Hedgehog with her monado, knocking him back.

"Ow, bitch, that hurt" Riley complained, getting into a spindash and moving back toward her.

"Speed!" Jp called out, switching to speed mode. She ran up to Riley and struck him again with the monado, Riley went up into the air and Jp leaped up swinging the monado all around and slicing Riley backwards. As Riley landed on the ground, Jp switched to Smash and backslashed onto him, knocking Riley out of the way and against a wall, knocking him out.

"Aw yeah erm gern" Jp shouted in excitement.

"Nice work Jp" Grenade said, giving a thumbs up.

As Grenade was distracted, Blooberri as Zero Suit Samus leaped in front of him and kicked him out of the way. She then blasted him with her stun gun and grabbed him with her grapple, bringing Grenade to her arms. Blooberri threw him upwards and leaped backwards, sending an upwards kick and knocking Grenade against the ceiling and then back towards the ground. Grenade attempted to retaliate by doing leg stretches but Blooberri sent a downwards kick against his head and knocked him against the wall, next to Riley, knocking him out of the game.

"And with that Riley and Grenade are both out. Team Jacob is down to 11 players, Troll Slaiyers lead with 12."

Blooberri glanced over at Jp.

"So, Bloob." Jp began.

"Jp." Bloob nodded.

"I heard you can see the future" Jp said.

The two began circling each other.

"If you could gaze into the future,  
You might think life would be a breeze,  
Seeing trouble from a distance,  
I try to save the situation  
Then I end up misbehaving" Blooberri said

"I can change the future. Ok that wasn't as good as your verses but I don't have much to work with. Anyways, looks like we have a battle of the psychics" Jp said.

Blooberri and Jp rushed toward each other.

Shrek's swamp was swamped with guests. All taking pictures of the ogre and his family and submitting their fanart into his mailbox.

"They won't go away…. they won't leave me alone…Donkey, what are we to do…" Shrek sighed, covering his face with his hands.

"Aw, cheer up Shrek. They'll go away sooner or later" Donkey tried to cheer his ogre friend up.

"You didn't." Shrek reminded him.

"Wow, that's harsh. I do not appreciate that, Shrek. Hmf." Donkey scoffed, walking away.

"At least he stopped yapping away." Shrek said to himself.

Shrek looked into the water and at his reflection. Instead of seeing a hideous, atrocious ogre he saw a friendly, smiling ogre giggling and blushing. Shrek punched the water and disgust.

"NOOOOOOOOOO! I need to put an end to this one way or another." Shrek screamed.

He glanced over at all the guests, excitedly entering his home and admiring all of his furniture.

"I'll have to do something so disgusting and despicable that they will never want to have any part of me again. But what…" Shrek thought to himself.

StarForce jumped over at Mike, who set off a Din's fire right in his path. StarForce fell to the ground. He threw out a fireball but Mike used Nayru's Love and reflected it back at StarForce. StarForce tried to use his cape but reacted too quickly and the fireball stuck him. StarForce was then ignited on fire. He started screaming and running in circles. Pseudonym spit some water at him, extinguishing the flames.

"Thanks!" StarForce thanked as Mike kicked his skull in, knocking him to the ground.

Pseudonym shot some water to the ground, projecting himself upward and away from the fight. He watched as Mike pummeled StarForce and sent out a large knight who stabbed him repeatedly. StarForce winced as Mike threw him against the wall. Kirby came running over, trying to suck Mike in. Mike rolled to the backside of Kirby and grabbed them, knocking them into the ground and pounding on him over and over again. Mike then leaped up and back-kicked Kirby against the wall with StarForce.

"StarForce and Kirby are both out! Team Jacob is down to 11, Troll Slaiyers 10." Admin announced over the intercom.

"Mike is really good, we need to take him out" Pseudonym noticed.

"Perhaps my skills could be of use here?" Rydli recommended.

"Bitch, I'm the best player. If there's one of us who can beat Mike, it's-a-me, Palutena" Cloud said, pointing at himself.

"Cloud why haven't you been fighting you've just been standing over here so far" Rydli complained.

"Sorry bro I just had to…y'know, take advantage of this new body. Aka fap." Cloud explained.

Cloud leaped in in front of Mike.

"Yo bro. How's it going" Cloud greeted.

"…" Mike said.

"Oh yeah I forgot you only speak in shitposts" Cloud remembered.

Cloud tapped his staff on the ground.

"Well let's smash" Cloud said.

Isaac then leaped over Mike's head, landing in front of Cloud.

"Wtf, Isaac what are you doing?" Cloud asked.

"Protecting Mike. From you." Isaac explained.

"Fuck off Isaac you're Pit and I'm Palutena. That makes you my bitch so you have to do what I say. And I say go away." Cloud ordered, lifting Isaac up with his magic and tossing him aside.

Isaac flew back and drew his bow.

"NO! Cloud, I'm going to fight you…and I'm going to win…" Isaac growled.

"What the heck bro" Cloud :s.

"I'm going to prove I am an epic Smash Bros player by TAKING YOU DOWN" Isaac shouted, striking Cloud with both of his blades.

Cloud shielded both attacks and slammed Isaac with his staff. Isaac fell back a bit, but then shot an arrow at Cloud. Cloud summoned a barrier, reflecting the arrow to Isaac, who summoned his guardian orbiras, which brought them back to hit Cloud. Cloud ran toward Isaac and spun his staff, Isaac jumped up and swiped downwards, hitting Cloud's head.

"Mother fucker that hurt" Cloud complained.

Cloud summoned a ray of light, knocking Isaac to the ground.

Sam walked over to Pantz. Pantz lightly tapped him and Sam went flying in the opposite direction. Jake then came running over. Pantz lightly tapped him and he was knocked up into the ceiling.

"Damn Ganondorf is so cool" Pantz said.

Then she saw Mike.

"Hey Mikearino. Let's tango" Pantz said.

Pantz began to walk very slowly at 0.5 MPH.

"OH shit I forgot how slow Ganondorf is" Pantz remembered.

Zelda jumped up and kicked Pantz in the head, knocking her to the ground. He then jumped on top of her and sent a flurry of kicks, before grabbing her and sending her backwards, then sending a Din's fire to ignite onto her. Pantz fell onto a table and cracked it. Pantz tried to get up but fell into a pit.

"What the hell who put this stupid pit here?" Pantz complained.

"Sorry we needed some way for you guys to fall of a ledge so we dug some holes up" Admin told her.

"Anyways, Team Jacob is down to 11 players, Troll Slaiyers down to 9." Admin recapped.

Mike taunted.

"Hey, you" a voice called out.

Mike turned around to see Shrek.

"You're a princess, right?" Shrek mumbled, looking down at the ground.

"OMG SHREK. YASS! I'm princess Zelda" Mike told him.

"Can you…come with me, I want to show you something…" Shrek told him.

"OF COURSE ANYTHING FOR YOU SHREK" Mike joyfully agreed, following Shrek as he walked toward a vacant room.

"Wait, Mike. Where are you gong?" Jake called out.

"While Mike's gone we're going to have to stand our ground" Nicholas said.

"Right" Jake nodded.

"Yeah, it's witch time" Gingerale said.

No one responded.

"Oh come on…." Gingerale sighed

Reu came running in with Caesar Zeppeli.

"Guys, look. It's Caesar! He's going to help us fight" Reu exclaimed.

"Reu you are a character that is literally from a fighting game, how much help do you need?" Jake asked.

Suddenly, the group was disrupted when Marrowsky leaped in.

"Hey it's Marr Marr" Nicholas noted.

Marrowsky growled and then sent an aura sphere at the group, striking them all and blasting them all against the wall. They coughed as Marrowsky ran towards them, delivering kicks and punches at Reu, who attempted to block. Ryu punched and kicked, ending with a shoryuken. But Marrowsky was relentless. He punched harder and grabbed Ryu, banging him against the wall.

"Holy hell what has gotten to Marr Marr" Nicholas asked as he, Jake, and Caesar hid under a table.

"Lucario gets stronger the more damage he takes. Someone really must have fucked him up bad to make him this strong" Jake explained.

Caesar kissed Jake's hand.

"So, Jake. Do you like hte spaghetti?" Caesar asked.

An explosion flipped the table over. Jake, Caesar, and Nicholas all ran away as Marrowsky and Reu were locked into a heated battle.

Mike was locked into the vacant room.

"I was only 19 years old I loved shrek so much, I had all the merchandise and movies

I pray to shrek every night before bed thanking him for the life I've been given.

Shrek is love I say, Shrek is life

My friends overhear me and calls me a faggot

I knew they were just jealous of my devotion for Shrek

I called them cunts

They slap me and send me to go to sleep

Im crying now, and my face hurts

I lay in bed and its really cold

A warmth is moving towards me.

I feel something touch me

Its shrek

I am so happy

He whispers in to ear "this is my swamp

He grabs me with his powerful ogre hands and puts me on my hands and knees

I'm ready

I spread my ass cheeks for Shrek

He penetrates my butthole

It hurts so much but I do it for Shrek

I can feel my butt tearing as my eyes start to water

I push against his force

I want to please Shrek

He roars a mighty roar as he fills my butt with his love

Imboo walks in

Shrek looks him straight in the eye and says "Its all ogre now"

Shrek leaves through my window

Shrek is love, Shrek is life" Mike says.

Shrek leaves the room.

"There…now nobody will have any respect for me ever again." Shrek declared.

Gingerale summoned the Madma Butterfly to punch Moogle. Mr. Moogle was sent flying and crashed into a newspaper cart, where newspapers fell all over his body. Gingerale got down and started shooting bullets from his heels at Moogle. Moogle, rolled out of the way before noticing the newspaper that was on his head.

"Wait a minute, The Haiku Times What is this?" Mr. Moogle asked himself, flipping through the pages.

"Guys, have a look at this" Mr. Moogle said.

"Are you serious? I'm in the middle of trying to kick your ass and you're still ignoring me?" Gingerale asked.

Rydli, Pseudonym, Joe, and Element surrounded Mr. Moogle as he flipped through the pages.

"Mr. Moogle of the Haikuers hints at the return of Haikik Vs Haiskype wars? I never said that what the heck" Mr. Moogle said, flipping through more pages.

"Nicholas plans on marching an anti-gay rally, Joe gets cucked, users against Element being mod, Robot may be hacking into surveillance videos?" Mr. Moogle continued to read the headlines.

"What is all of this?" Element asked.

"Cucked?..." Joe sighed.

"This is what I told you about. That Haiku Reporter guy. He must be writing aritcles about us." Mr. Moogle exclaimed.

"Nobody reads newspapers anymore, who cares?" Pseudonym shrugged.

"Pseudo caught sucking major dick" Mr. Moogle read another headline.

"That never happened what the hell" Pseudo yelled, taking the newspaper out of Moogle's hands and shifting his eyes back and forth.

"Who is writing all of this shit?" Rydli asked.

"Seriously. I'm right here. It could be like 5 on 1 right now if you threw some attention my way" Gingerale yelled over.

Pseduo flipped through more headlines.

"Riley caught masturbating at a jpop concert. Rydli's leg stretches inspire girls worldwide. Mike…what the hell…" Pseudo continued to read.

"" Mike what the hell"" is a weird headline" Rydi said.

"Not really if you've paid attention to the things he has drawn" Element said.

"It says here that Mike…. was sexually assaulted by Shrek?" Pseudo read.

"I'm not even going to bother" Gingerale sighed, walking away.

Moogle took the newspaper back and read the article about Mike.

"Holy shit. Mike…got raped? By Shrek!?" Mr. Moogle exclaimed.

"How would someone even witness something like that? Is this guy one of the Haikuers on board? Who is behind this?" Element asked.

"Well, I only see two real possibilities. The only two people who still like alt accounts in 2016: Ret and Cameron." Mr. Moogle proclaimed.

"It's probably Cam, Ret can't hold a secret identity for more than 5 minutes" Pseudonym said.

"But we killed Cameron at Haikucon" Joe reminded them.

"What? Oh, yeah" Pseduo remembered.

"What happens at Haikucon stays at Haikucon" Rydli said.

"Who…are you…" Mr. Moogle asked, looking at the newspaper again, and seeing the text at the bottom that read "Published by Haiku Reporter"

Shrek whistled as he casually took a paper off the newspaper stand, flipping through the pages until he found the right page. He read the article about him raping Mike and smiled.

Some people walked by and Shrek raised the newspaper to hide his fat ugly ogre face and eavesdrop on the conversation.

"Did you hear about what Shrek did?" one of them asked.

"Yeah apparently, he had sex with some kid" the other said.

"Wow…who would have thought Shrek was so cool. I mean, he already was cool, but that just makes him even more badass…" the first guy said.

"WHAT?!" Shrek shouted, ripping the newspaper in half.

"You don't see any problem with what I did to that kid?" Shrek asked.

"Oh my God it's him! Shrek! I'm such a huge fan!" one of them yelled in glee.

"Seriously? After what I did to him, your opinion of me didn't change at all?!" Shrek asked angrily.

"Well no, you didn't really do anything wrong. Just asserted your dominance and all. Just typical guy stuff." They shrugged.

"I RAPED A KID." Shrek yelled.

"That's just locker room stuff. Kid was 19 anyways. He was probably asking for it anyways" they dismissed, walking away.

Shrek stood, stunned. He ripped his newspaper into pieces and roared.

Blooberri kicked Jp upwards, who followed up by striking her monado downwards. It striked Blooberri and knocked her back a bit. Blooberri jumped up and did a helicopter attack with her bots, knocking Jp down. They both landed on the ground. Blooberri foresaw Jp using a backslash so she shot out a stun ray, but Jp foresaw the stun ray and activated her shield art, which Blooberri foresaw so she flipped behind her to kick her in the head, however Jp foresaw the attack so she pumped her monado upwards to hit Blooberri, but Blooberri foresaw that attack so she went to the ground and did a sweep at the ground, but Jp foresaw that so she leaped up and swung the monado around, which Blooberri foresaw so she twirled her legs up to strike Jp.

After going through about 30 different visions each they both got very confused and passed out.

"Blooberri and Jp are…both out I guess" Adimn shrugged.

Isaac and Cloud were still locked in battle. Isaac tried to use an upperdash arm, but Cloud countered it, striking Isaac and knocking him back a bit. Isaac got back up and ran toward Cloud, who show up another ray of light. Isaac shot numerous arrows, each of which Cloud reflected. Isaac started panting as Palutena used an aretical or whatever the fck.

"Just give up Isaac. Tahe the L" Cloud insisted.

"No…I'm going to beat you!" Isaac decalred, rushing forth once more. Cloud spun his staff around once more, knocking Isaac back and pinning him to the ground.

J came running in, he leaped forward and brought his sword down on Cloud, who teleported behind him. Cloud then jabbed the staff at J's back. J took a bomb out but Cloud knocked J away with his wings, causing the bomb to explode in J's hands.

"aaaaaaaa FUCK OFF CLOUD" J screamed, running at him again.

Cloud used counter as J threw out an attack with his sword, knocking him against Isaac. The two were now knocked out.

"I'm..just gonna head back that way…" Lemon said from behind J and Isaac, running away from Cloud.

"Team Jacob stands at 8 players left, or 7, I don't really know what happened to Mike. Meanwhile Troll Slaiyers still have 8 players standing." Admin recapped.

Robot rolled over and threw a gyro at Carz, who was guzzling cum as he wakka wakka'd.

Carz was stunned as Robot spun her arms around and hit Carz repeatedly, then ended with a laser beam, knocking Carz out. Mr. Moogle leaped up and threw out his thingy to latch onto Robot, kicking her back. Robot retaliated by grabbing Moogle and digging him into the ground. As Moogle was tossed into the air Robot jumped up and threw her arms up, attacking Moogle and sending him back toward the ground. Robot then landed above him and sent a burst from her rockets at him, knocking him out completely.

[Mr. Moogle in le confession toilet]  
"I was caught off guard."  
[le end]

Robot smiled as she saw the number of Troll Slaiyers go down to 6.

"We need Robot" Robot heard someone say.

Robot listened to the conversation going on nearby.

"Mike is out for some reason, something about Shrek impregnating him? Our main tool now is Robot" Jake told Nicholas.

"When am I going to do something?" Caesar asked.

"Ugh Robot sucks though. All she does is talk about R.O.B. I think we can handle the other team without her." Nicholas said.

"Come on, we need all the help we can get. Even if she's a weirdo she can actually be useful for this challenge" Jake explained.

Robot looked down sadly.

[Robot in le confession toilet]  
"Is that all I am? A good Smash player? They really do think I'm a weirdo…why did I even come to this stupid thing.  
[le end]

Robot walked away.

"Is this the part where we say positive things about Robot now that she isn't listening in anymore?" Jake asked.

"No that would be retarded that doesn't happen in real life." Nicholas said.

"Yeah I hate when reality shows get so unrealistic" Caesar admitted as he saw Shrek coming towards them.

"What the SHRKE" Jake screamed as Shrek super slammed them.

Shrek grabbed Nick and Jake and slammed their heads against each other.

"SHRWKS" Jake screamed.

Nick whacked Shrek with his tail.

"Go Jake. Run away. I'll handle Shrek" Nicholas ordered.

"But I want to help" Jake sad.

"You're not strong enough. I will use my Epic Pikachu Skills to defeat him." Nicholas explained.

Jake ran away as fast as he could, howling into the moon,

Shrek farted on Nicholas and slammed him against a table.

"I AM SICK AND TIRED OF YOU INVADING MY SWAAAAAAAAAAAAAMP" Shrek screamed at the top of his lungs.

Nicholas tried to electrocute him but Shrek grabbed Nick by the throat and slammed him deep into the ground, then kicked his head in.

Marrowsky and Reu were still fighting. Marrowsky sent out another aura sphere, but Reu jumped over it and used a terstyousgpsjginspgn and kicked Marrowsky backward. Marrowsky growled.

"terstyousgpsjginspgn" Marrowsky said.

Marrowsky jumped up and kicked at Reu, who grabbed Marrowsky by the feet and started twirling him around. Marrowsky then let go and let Marrowsky fly towards a wall. Before Marrowsky could hit it, he used extreme speed to go back toward Reu. Marrowsky pulled his arm back punched Reu in the face. Reu fell down a bit, then looked up at Marrowsky. They both ran for each other and Ryu sent out a kick, but Marrowsky slid under it and grabbed Reu, flipping him. As Reu flipped in the air, Marrowsky shielded against Reu's upcoming attack, however Reu used the collarbone breaker to break Marrowksy's shield. As Marrowsky was paralyzed, Reu punched him as hard as he could, sending him flying toward the wall, smashing against it, and falling to the ground unconsciously. Reu tightened his headband and ran away.

Sam used his loid to rocket toward the Troll Slaiyers. Pseudonym used his water gun to propel himself upward, latching himself to a wall and looking below. Lemon waddled over toward Element and Rydli, playing as Roy and Lucina.

"We got this" Rydli said confidently.

Lemon pulled his hammer back, a rocket emerging from behind it. Element swung his sword at Lemon, slicing at him repeatedly. Lemon was knocked backward, but he began to suck in air. Element was sucked into Lemon's mouth, who then shot him out and knocked him against Rydli, who both fell down. Lemon lifted his hammer up and brought it down on Element, causing Element to fly backwards. Element jumped back, holding his sword back and charging it with fire. As he was about to attack Lemon the floor caved in and Element fell into the pit.

"Whoa. Lucky." Lemon said, looking down.

[Element in le confesson toilet]  
"FUCK. SMASH. THIS IS WHY STREET FIGHTER IS BETTER IT ACTUALLY REQUIRES SKILL AND DOESN'T HAVE RANDOM SHIT THAT RUIN THE GAME"  
[le end]

"That was one of my favorite characters…you'll pay for that, Lemon…" Rydli screamed, gritting his teeth and jumping for him.

Sam tried dropping a bowling ball on Rydli as he approached him and Lemon, but Pseduonym appeared from his shadow sneak and punched Sam out of the way. Pseduonym then formed a water shuriken and flung it at Sam, carrying him away. Pseudonym leaped away from Lemon and Rydli, leaving them two to fight.

"Things get intense as Team Jacob narrows to 7 players and Troll Slaiyers trail behind with only 4 remaining" Admin informed the audience.

Caesar and Shrek began to fight.

Caesar spread his hands apart, a trail of bubbles forming between them. He then threw them all at Shrek.

"Fucking bubbles?" Nicholas asked.

Shrek grabbed Caesar and punched him in the face. Caesar summoned a bubble barrier to trap Shrek in. Shrek was surrounded by a bubble and began floating away. He farted and shattered the bubble barrier, ground pounding on Caesar. Caesar scoffed and summoned some bubble cutters and shredded it off Shrek. Shrek's skin started bleeding.

"You got a little fight in ya? I like that…" Shrek said, wiping the blood off.

Shrek jumped over some bubble cutters and slammed off Caesar. Caesar shot as many bubbles at Shrek as he could. Shrek didn't flinch, continuing to punch at Caesar and knocking him back.

"You. Yellow Rat. Tear down the ceiling! NOW!" Caesar demanded.

"Wouldn't kill you to say please…" Nicholas said, summoning a thunderbolt. The entire ceiling of the building collapsed.

"This is a very dangerous comic-con" some tourist noted as he witnessed the Haikuers fighting and the building collapsing around him.

Caesar then summoned a bunch of bubbles. Bubbles filled the entire room.

Lemon and Rydli watched in confusion as bubbles surrounded them, as did Sam and Pseduonym. Joe looked up to see bubbles around her too. Reu saw the bubbles as he ran toward Nick and Caesar. Shrek looked at the bubbles with confusion.

"What is all of this?" Shrek asked.

The sunlight then began to reflect off all of the bubbles, it struck each one before finally shining all of the light in the sky to Shrek, slamming him backwards.

"Hmf" Caesar smiled.

Shrek snarled, standing up and gritting his teeth. He ate an onion and then used all of his might to run toward Caesar, throwing punch after punch. Caesar tried to block the punches but Shrek kept going and going before starting to punch his face. Caesar summoned bubbles but Shrek popped all of them. Shrek farted, causing Caesar to drop his guard and cover his nose with his hands. Shrek continued punching Caesar before grabbing his head and slamming it into the ground. Shrek Then body slammed on top of him. Caesar tried to stand up but was bleeding all over. Reu arrived at the scene.

"What's going on?" Reu asked Nicholas.

"Shrek just farted on that anime guy and now he's dying I think" Nicholas explained.

Shrek stood up and wiped blood off his face. Caesar struggled to get up.

"CAESAR" Reu screamed like a little girl, fainting into Nicholas' arms.

"Reu…this is the last of my hamon, take it" Caesar shouted, using his blood to create one last bubble. Blood poured out of Caear's body as he used all of his power to construct an amulet made out of it. He wrapped his headband around it and tossed it to Reu, who watched as Caesar perished. Caesar then exploded.

Reu's jaw dropped as he watched. Shrek climbed out of the pit Caesar died in and yawned, scratching his butt.

"You monster…you killed Caesar…you piece of shit." Reu snarled.

Shrek burped.

"What's the matter, you gonna cry?" Shrek asked.

Reu clenched his fists then turned to Nicholas.

"Nick, vore me." Reu requested.

"Uh, you're a little big for that to work, pal" Nicholas said.

Reu grabbed Nicholas' mouth and opened wide, then stuck his head in.

Nicholas gagged as Reu entered his mouth and forced Nicholas to swallow him. A bunch of light radiated from Nicholas. Shrek watched with a confused glance. Jake watched from underneath a table. A large wind blew as Nicholas began to transform. Ryu's body emerged, but with the tail and head of a Pikachu.

"We are Reuinclas." They announced.

"Or Pikaryu" they added.

"I've seen some weird things in my day but this? I don't know what to say…" Shrek admitted.

Sam shot some fireworks above him, but Pseudonym jumped back, throwing more water shurikens at him. Sam pocketed one and threw it back, but Pseudo disappeared. Sam looked around dumbfounded, but was surprised to see Pseduo reappear out of nowhere and kick him in the stomach, sending him flying backwards. As Sam landed on the ground, he planted a tree and watered it. He swung his axe once. Pseudo jumped over the tree and whacked Sam with his water sword. Sam tried to shoot a slingshot at Pseudo but he dodged it and then hit Sam with another sword Sam was smacked against a wall and fainted.

"Motherfucekr…" Sam cried out, dropping his head to the ground.

Reuniclas punched Shrek with electricity. Reuniclas keept punching and using thunderbolts in succession against Shrek, before sweeping him with its tail.

"Ok, ok, stop fighting me!" Shrek begged.

"This is for Caesar" Reuniclas said, punching Shrek in the face, shocking his entire body. Shrek was blasted away, smashing through a wall.

"Alright, we're ready to open our Q&A for the Walking Dead panel" the host said into the microphone.

Shrek crashed through the wall and slammed into the host, knocking the podium down and causing the entire table to collapse. A fire went off and all of the guests screamed and ran away in terror.

"Ok nobody invite the Haiku Drama cast to comic-con ever again" the host declared.

Reuniclas crackes his fists and then his neck.

"Give it up Lemon, I am going to kick your ass" Rydli boasted.

"You chose the one Fire Emblem almost everybody agrees is a wasted slot. I'm liking my chances." Lemon said back.

"Bro. You just broke the bro code. Never. Insult. A bros. Waifu." Rydli snarled.

"Well I guess that means…I don't consider you a bro…" Lemon darkened his eyes.

Rydi's jaw dropped. He got angry, running for Lemon. Lemon laid on the ground, doing his sexy pose. Rydli threw his sword out, hitting Lemon. Lemon stuck his hammer out, twirling it and knocking Rydli back. Cloud appeared behind Lemon.

"Well well well, the Lemster" Cloud said.

"Cloud, here to back me up, I see" Rydli noticed.

"Leave him to me Rydli, I will finish him off" Cloud said.

"Wtf no we can take him down together. He insulted my waifu and now I'm really mad" Rydli explained.

"I want to fight Lemon" Cloud insisted.

"No me" Rydli said.

Lemon walked away as Cloud and Rydli fought over who would fight him.

"Let's see, who is left. There's me, Reuniclas, Lemon, and Robot." Jake counted on his fingers.

"Wait, where the heck did Robot go?" Jake wondered, looking around and not seeing her anywhere in sight.

Shrek stood up, and looked at the audience.

"Well, I beat up a bunch of kids, had sex with one of them, killed a beloved anime character, crashed a Walking Dead panel, and literally stole candy from a baby. Bet you guys are tired of me now, huh?" Shrek asked everyone in the room.

"Aw, that's so Shrek to do all those things" someone said, provoking everyone else to laugh.

"NO NO WHAT THE HECK IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE." Shrek screamed.

"Can you do a Shrek panel?" someone asked.

"YES! SHREK! SHREK! SHREK!' everyone chanted.

Shrek walked out of the room, angrily.

"Why won't these people look at me differently? I just want to be feared once again. But all I am is some kind of joke…" Shrek sighed, walking away sadly.

Robot Rolled sadly around the con, hiding from the rest of the Haikuers and clenching an amiibo to her chest. She looked up sadly.

[Song 20 – Layers]  
Sad.

Shrek: I don't know  
Why these people  
Won't leave me alone

I try  
To be unappealing  
To earn their discern

But despite  
My efforts  
It just will not work

No matter  
What I do  
I'm still liked by dorks

Oh can't they just see  
What's really inside me  
Oh can't they just see  
I have more to show  
Oh can't they just see  
What's really inside me  
Oh can't they just see  
That there's more to know

Because Ogres (Ogres), have layers (Layers)  
Because Ogres (Ogres), have layers (Layers)

There's more to see, than the surface shows  
My personality, you really should know

Because Ogres (Ogres), have layers (Layers)  
Because Ogres (Ogres), have layers (Layers)

Robot: I try to be  
Someone that  
People can see

For my ability  
To animate  
Exceptionally

But despite that  
They look  
And see

I'm a freak  
Who likes R.O.B.  
Over affectionately

Oh can't they just see  
What's really inside me  
Oh can't they just see  
I have more to show  
Oh can't they just see  
What's really inside me  
Oh can't they just see  
That there's more to know

Because Robots (Robots), have layers (Layers)  
Because Robots (Robots), have layers (Layers)

There's more to see, than the surface shows  
My personality, you really should know

Because Robots (Robots), have layers (Layers)  
Because Robots (Robots), have layers (Layers)

Shrek: They laugh, they see  
I'm just a joke  
What's wrong with me?

Robot: They scoff, they ignore  
Oh why can't they see  
My individuality?

Shrek: My only empathy  
Comes from my specialty  
The only one who gets me

Because onions have layers  
Ogres have layers  
Onions have layers  
Ogres have layers

Robot: I admit, I want more  
Then they implore  
To explore

Because onions have layers  
Robots have layers  
Onions have layers  
Robots have layers

Shrek: Because Ogres (Ogres), have layers (Layers)  
Robot Because Robots (Robots), have layers (Layers)

Shrek: Because Ogres (Ogres), have layers (Layers)  
Robot Because Robots (Robots), have layers (Layers)

Both: Why can't they see?

Shrek: Because Ogres (Ogres), have layers (Layers)  
Robot Because Robots (Robots), have layers (Layers)

Both: That there's more to me?

Shrek: Because Ogres (Ogres), have layers (Layers)  
Robot Because Robots (Robots), have layers (Layers)

Shrek: Because Ogres (Ogres), have layers (Layers)  
Robot Because Robots (Robots), have layers (Layers)

[le big finish]

Shrek sighed as he walked back towards the room he had left. With a stern glance, he walked back inside and back up to the podium. Everyone in the crowd stopped mumbling. Shrek looked at them all, and with a quick motion, he grabbed an onion out of his pocket and placed it on the table for all to see. He then folded his arms and shifted his eyes from the left to the right side of the room, staring at each person defiantly.

"What is this?" Shrek asked the audience.

Everyone stood silent for a moment.

"An onion?" someone called out.

"No, it's me." Shrek said, pointing at himself.

Robot heard the lecture going on from outside and entered the room, taking a seat in the back out of curiosity.

"Onions, have layers. I, have layers. Therefore, I am an onion. In a sense, we are all onions. The whole world is an onion. Never let someone tell you you do not have layers. Because we all do. I do, you do, and you, and you, and you" Shrek began, pointing at different people across the room.

"Deep inside, at the heart of each person, we find their core. We find one similar thing between all of us, and that is that we are onions. Onions have layers. We ALL have layers. Whether you choose to believe so or not, is up to you. You can believe there's only what's on the surface, or you can choose to believe there's always more underneath. Discover the layers" Shrek demonstrated, peeling an onion for all to see.

Robot looked down, sinking in what Shrek had to say.

"If we aren't onions, then what are we? A peach? No. You should become one with your inner-onion. Embrace it. And accept it. Instead of looking at someone for their base characteristics, consider there's always more layers underneath." Shrek finished, tossing the onion to the crowd.

Everyone stood dumbfounded for a moment.

"Top 10 anime speeches" Robot said aloud.

"Alright, so it appears we are down to the final 8 contestants for the challenge. 4 from each team. Since that's the limit in a Smash game, we are going to close the battlefield in and make this a little more intense." Admin proclaimed.

Cloud and Rydli were still arguing when they noticed the ground around them begin to rise. Pseudonym hung onto a wall as he saw Cloud and Rydli rise. Joe was sighing as she sat down, looking at pictures of chickens shaking their butts as the ground below her began to rise as well.

Reuniclas was walking around, looking for a new challenger when he started to rise. Jake began to rise and hit his head off the table he was under like a doofus. Gingerale was buying some merchandise from a booth when he started to rise before he could collect the monado replica he had paid for.

"HEY WAIT. BITCH, I DROPPED $200 ON THAT LET ME GET IT FIRST" Gingerale shouted as he started to rise higher away from the booth.

Lemon was running away from Cloud and Rydli when the ground below him began to rise as well.

Robot walked out of the room of the Walking Dead panel, noticing the others getting high. She jumped on one of the rising platforms as it levitated upwards. The remaining Haikuers were lifted up to a floating arena for them to fite on. Each of them leaped over to stand on it. Bars were set on each side of the platform, creating a boxing ring-like structure. The attendees of the con watched from below as the Haikuers stood at different sides of the ring.

Reuniclas looked below.

"Wow never noticed all of the minorities here. Can't even go to a place like Far Far Away without running into Mexican princesses nowadays" he said.

"Sorry that was the Niclas part of me I don't think like that" he said again.

"We are one we think the same, you agree with me you nip" Reuniclas argued.

"Shut up no I don't my conscious has its own thoughts" Reuniclas proposed.

"Not if we SHARE one LEARN2FUSE" Reuniclas yelled.

Reuniclas then started punching himself angrily.

"Hey a Pikaryu" Rydli observed.

"Same rule as before. One stock. If you fall out of the ring, you're out. Last team standing wins." Admin reminded them, appearing on the large falt screen behind them.

"Ah, Cloud. So we made it to the finals. How about we settle this with a 1v1 Roy battle?" Rydli proposed.

"Fuck off faggot" Cloud said, tossing Rydli aside and going for the Jacobs.

Pseudonym emerged from his shadow sneak to attack Lemon. Lemon was thrown upwards. He threw a gordo at Pseudo, knocking him back. He threw some water shurikens at Lemon. Lemon leaped over and whacked Pseudo with his hammer.

Rydli and Cloud were fighting Reuniclas at the same time. Rydli was using fierce sword attacks while Cloud attacked with his staff, but Reuniclas blocked each attack and electrocuted them with their electrical body.

Jake ran over and kicked Rydli in the head.

"Wow rude" Rydli said, turning around and starting to fight Jake.

Jake started kicking Rydli furiously before Rydli used a counter to throw him into a corner.

Gingerale was walking around all of the destruction, looking for someone to fight, when he found Joe, sitting alone in a corner.

"Hey you, you haven't fought all day, have you. Why don't you fight me then, Nessie boy." Gingerale urged with a smirk.

Joe shifted her eyes to Gingerale and stood up, looking at him with a blank stare.

watch?v=ZcoqR9Bwx1Y

Joe raised her arms as a multitude of beams were rised around her, ready to throw at Gingerale.

"Hooooooooly shit" Gingerale's jaw dropped.

Lemon thrusted his hammer at Pseudo, twisting it and knocking him back. Pseduo then propelled himself directly to Lemon, sending out a swing from his water sword, knocking him against the bar of the ring, and bouncing him back. Lemon tried to throw a gordo but Pseudo used a a substitute to dodge it, kicking Lemon some more. Lemon began to charge the cannon from at the end of his hammer. He landed on the ground and struck Pseduo, throwing him to the ceiling.

Jake kicked Rydli over and over before sweeping him with his tail. Rydli grabbed Jake and threw him at Reunicas, the two fell over. Cloud sturck them both with his staff. Reuniclas tackled Cloud, pushing him to the edge of the arena.

Gingerale rolled away from all of the bullets thrown at him from Joe.

"JESUS CHRIST GIVE ME A BREAK FOR ONE SECOND" Gingerale yelled out as he evaded as many as he could.

More and more shot out from around Joe, going around Gingerale. He used his witch time to evade even more, seeing where each would appear and using the knowledge to dodge them.

Pseudo threw out more swipes at Lemon, who ran stepped back with each strike. Lemon threw out another gordo and began charging his hammer. Pseduo used substitute, then lunging at Lemon, but Lemon was ready and launched his hammer, slamming against Pseduonym and knocking him far out of the ring.

Reuniclas continued to fight Rydli and Cloud. Cloud and Rydli kept spamming counter.

"Bitches" Reuniclas complained.

Reuniclas grabbed Cloud and threw him at Rydli.

"I need backup!" Rreuniclas called out.

Robot then leaped over their head.

"Oh fuck I forgot they had Robot" Cloud admitted.

"I forgot Robot was here" Rydli admitted.

Robot shot out a beam at the two, paralyzing them for a bit. She then started charging a gyro, launching it at them.

Reuniclas took a deep breath, trying to regain energy from the exhausting battle, when he saw Lemon walk towards them.

"Oh, Lemon. You're still in this? Surprised, you are a big pussy" Reuniclas taunted.

Lemon frowned.

"Was your vagina to large you didn't fight at all? Did you just avoid battles until you were down to the finals? Because that would make sense, since you're such a huge pussy after all, haha" Reuniclas continued.

Lemon started to glare at him.

"How many Lemon's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? The answer is undefined, Lemon could never do it because he can't handle any authority" Reuniclas joked.

Lemon slammed Reuniclas with his banhammer, whacking the fusion out of the ring and knocking them out of the game.

Robot spun her arms around, inflicting damage upon Rydli and Cloud at the same time. Cloud swung out his staff, knocking Robot back a bit. Rydli jumped for her, but she shot out another beam. Cloud charged up his wings, but Lemon leaped above Robot and threw a gordo at Cloud. Robot turned in the other direction and Rydli chased her down.

Gingerale kept dodging each bullet sent out from Joe. Joe sent out hundreds and hundreds.

"Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck my ass fuck my ass fuck my ass fuck my ass fuck my ass fuck my ass fuck my ass fuck my ass" Gingerale shouted out, taking steps between each ot the hundreds of bullets that passed by him.

"You want to touch me?" Gingerale asked.

"So, Lemon, it's down to us. The last of the haikik founding fathers" Cloud said.

"Oh, yeah, I guess so." Lemon said.

"First we killed Cameron, Bless, Luke. Now it's just us. It's time I finish you." Cloud threatened.

"wtf bro I thought we were bros" Lemon said.

"We are, bro. It's just…as long as you're on that team, I will not show mercy." Cloud explained.

"Well may-"

Cloud slammed Lemon with his rings, knocking him out of the ring.

"HA! BITCH! Fell for the 'ol talking in the middle of a fight strategy. Didn't see it coming, idiot" Cloud laughed

Rydli threw out as many attacks with his sword as he could, but Robot didn't show any fatigue, throwing out more punches and gyros than Rydli could handle. Rydli started breathing heavily as Robot grabbed him, digging him into the ground and then tossing him for the arena's exit. He grabbed onto the ledge, holding on with dear life. Robot then glanced over at Cloud.

"So we're down to Jake and Robot for Team Jacob, and Cloud and Joe for Troll Slaiyers. Things are HEATING UP" Admin announced.

"DON'T FUCK WITH A WITCH" Gingerale screamed as he dodged more bullets, trying to close in on Joe, he got closer with each other cartwheel.

Cloud threw out a ray of light at Robot, knocking her upwards. Robot spun her arms around her body as fast as she could, nudging Cloud and pushing him close to the edge. Cloud struck her with his wings, sending her to the center of the ring, where he glided towards.

"Prepare to get owned" Cloud said, readying his wings.

But Robot sent out another laser beam, knocking him to the ground, and his staff several feet away.

Robot stoof above him, cahring a gyro.

"Beep beep" Robot said with intimidation.

"WHY! Why are you so obsessed with robots! Jesus Christ! Just, uh, why!" Cloud asked, trying to buy some time as he reached for his staff.

"Why?" Robot repeated, holding off on charging her gyro.

"Yeah" Cloud said, focusing his attention on getting back his staff.

"Because…" Robot explained, turning around.

"When you're a robot, you don't have emotions. You don't care what others think of you. You don't get swept up with feelings, because you have none. When you're a robot, you're not constantly dragging yourself down. You don't care what anyone thinks, you don't care what you think. You're just a strong, stoic machine. And…that's what I am..." Robot explained.

As Robot was giving her speech, Cloud smashed her with his wings, knocking her out of the ring.

"WHAT" she yelled out as she plummeted to the ground.

Gingerale was getting closer to Joe, the thousands of bullets passing around him grew faster and wider.

Robot used her rocket jump to try and get back to the stage. Cloud leapt off to finish the job, slam dunking her down. Jake noticed this and jumped off the stage as Cloud attempted to wavedash up but couldn't because Smash 4 doesn't have wavedash.

"Wtf lost my ump" Cloud said, attempting to teleport instead.

As was about to teleport, Jake extended his tongue out, latching onto Cloud and sucking him in. Jake then pooped out the egg Cloud was in, and the egg fell to the ground with Jake.

"NOOOOOOOOOOO!" Cloud screamed.

"Wow, guess that leaves Joe…and…oh yeah, Gingerale" Admin remembered.

Robot opened her eyes from the ground amongst the other Haikuers laying unconsciously. She saw a booth nearby that beckoned her. She stood up and rubbed her eyes, looking again. She saw a life-size R.O.B. She ran over to it.

"He's…so perfect…I….need him…" Robot said, hugging the giant robot.

"beep" she said, fondling it. She rubbed its eyes with care as she store into them.

Robot pulled the R.O.B. closer to her, giving it a kiss on its eyes. She then laid the R.O.B. back as she began licking its neck, going down until she reached its upper torso. She pulled his arms back and gave him a huge hug before humping the robot. She humped it some more while fondling R.O.B.'s cord, stroking it faster and faster until the R.O.B. shot out some cum and beeped very loudly. The R.O.B. started to overheat, which aroused Robot. Robot ripped the hands off the R.O.B. and stuck it up her ass. The R.O.B. started beeping ouder and louder, getting hotter with each gesture. R.O.B.'s head tilted, shooting out sparkly eyes as Robot began to suck on his motherboard. She stuck her gyro deep inside it, misconfiguring all of the wires, which made R.O.B. feel even hotter. Robot stuck her gyro deeper, humping inside the fellow robot. They both beeped as Robot held a tight grip on his cord, stroking it some more, she pulled on it hard, which made R.O.B. let out a long beep. Robot then sucked on the cord as R.O.B.'s rocket booster went off, igniting a large flame on Robot's body. She moaned as she stuck her gyro in as deep as she could, causing R.O.B. to overheat and fall over. But Robot held on, giving him more kisses. She inserted her gyro deep into each of R.O.B.'s slots, before turning him around and sticking it straight up his motherboard, which held his rocket boosts. R.O.B. yelled and let out another boost from his rockets as the gryo stuck deep inside. They both orgasmed as Robot fell onto R.O.B., panting heavily.

Marrowsky watched in interest.

"Hot" he exclaimed.

Gingerale cartwheeled between each of Joe's shots, finally arriving next to her and throwing up an uppercut by summoning madma butterfly. As Joe was knocked into the air, Gingerale was hit by a multitude of bullets. Gingerale flinched a bit as he was knocked to the ground. He shot out some bullets from his heels at Joe, who fell next to him. Joe panted and stood up. Rydli, still clinging onto the edge of the arena, pulled himself up.

"Joe, you can do this" Rydli said encouragingly.

"Huh?" Joe asked.

"You can do it, you can win" Rydli repeated.

"I didn't really need you to say that, the stacks aren't exactly stacked against me" Joe told him, turning her full attention to Rydli. Gingerale started, crawling toward Joe.

"Just channel the anger, Joe. Use the pain and express it in a rage to destroy your opponent" Rydli explained.

"What rage?" Joe asked.

"The rage you felt when Pantz didn't accept your love" Rydli explained.

"What are you talking about? You mean Zi-I mean, I haven't been into Pantz in years" Joe admitted.

[Rydli in le confession toilet]  
"Did she almost say Ziggy? Oh that makes this better…"  
[le end]

"Well yeah, but I mean, you must have felt pretty let down when they just left you alone like that after leading you on, huh? You must feel so alone. So betrayed. You just want to destroy that person, right?" Rydli asked.

Joe thought for a moment.

"n..no?" Joe thought, unsure what she wanted.

"You want to destroy that person for crushing your heart. You want to make sure everyone hates them and sees the pain they brought onto you, don't you? It fills you with rage. Use that rage to destroy your opponent and win the challenge!" Rydli edged on.

"I, uh…no! Rydli, shut up! SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP! Just because I had a personal conflict with someone doesn't mean everyone else needs to hate that person, it's none of their business, I'm not listening to you!" Joe screamed.

"Ok well you should at least be paying attention to the challenge" Rydi said.

Joe turned around as Gingerale kicked her to the corner of the stage. Gingerale ran towards her. Joe tried to retaliate, but before she could react, Gingerale stomped the ground, summoning madma butterfly who stomped on Joe and Rydli, knocking them both way down until they both smashed against the ground. Gingerale blew smoke off his gun.

"Looks like I, oh how do the Americans put it...oh yes, 'Busted a cap in yo ass" Gingerale said.

The Smash victory theme blasted off the speakers and confetti rained on Gingerale

"Congratulations!" Admin congratulated, grabbing Gingerale's hand and raising it up.

Everyone else clapped sarcastically.

"Why do we have to clap I hate this" Rydli complained.

"I don't have any control over my hands right now" Pantz whispered as she clapped unwillingly.

"GINGERALE?! GINGERALE?! OF ALL THE PEOPLE WHO COULD HAVE WON IT WAS FUCKING GINGERALEDRAGON?!" Cloud screamed like a little gri.

"I'm genuinely glad" J said.

Gingerale dusted himself off as he walked to the center of the room, surrounded by all of the Haikuers

Everyone looked at him with silence

"I just…I just want to know…why no one will talk to me anymore…why have you all been ignoring me?" Gingerale asked.

":s" Jake said.

Everyone exchanged confused galnces.

"I don't know what I did. Maybe it was saying your website was broken beyond repair, or indirectly killing Nick's Grovyle. I just want you guys to talk to me again, or at least know why you all suddenly act like I don't exist." Gingerale said.

"Dude, no one is ignoring you" Sam said.

"What?" Gingerale asked.

"We never intended to ignore you" Reuniclas said.

"Yeah we just weren't responding to what you said, because we didn't think it was interesting." Jake explained.

"You. Didn't ignore me?" Gingerale asked again, unsure.

"No, not ignore. Just didn't respond. It's completely different." Lemon agreed.

"Wow…that changes everything! Maybe that means you all WILL show up to my cock vore party!" Gingerale said with glee.

"That should be interesting. Anyways, congratulations Team Jacob, you have won the challenge. Troll Slaiyers, pack your bags. Because one of you are going home" Admin told them.

All of the Troll Slaiyers exchanged glances, some nervous, some uncaring, some tired, and some horny.

[Element in le confession toilet]  
"I still think a Killer Instinct challenge would have been more fair."  
[le end]

Everyone was walking toward the exit of the building when they noticed someone crying. They looked over to see Shrek, sitting by himself in the corner, crying.

"It's not me, it's the onions. Although I am an onion, so I guess it is me" Shrek explained, wiping tears away was he cried.

"Shrek?" "What's the matter, brogre?" Cloud asked.

"I…I am just tired. I just…I want people to get out of my swamp. It's all I ask. I just want some peace and quiet. But they won't listen. When will they learn? When will they learn that their actions have consequences? Every day someone new is at my swamp bothering me and shouting quotes I've said or submitting fan art, I'm just sick of it all. I tried to be disgusting, unlikable, I tried to turn them away. But no matter what. I do people still like me." Shrek cried, wiping his eyes with his onion.

The Haikuers all looked around somberly, listening to Shrek weep. Pseudonym thought for a moment, and remembered something.

"Hey…wait a minute, Shrek?" Pseudo called out.

"Hm?" Shrek called out, boogers were dripping from his nose.

"I think I just might know a way to get people to stop liking you" Pseudonym explained.

"What is it?" Shrek asked eagerly.

"There is a place that can suck all of the humor out of a subject, a place that can beat something so much that everyone gets sick of it. A place that ruins all memes" Pseudonym explained.

The tourists were lined up outside of Shrek's swamp. Donkey was selling Shrek merchandise. Fiona was inside with the shreklings.

"Where is daddy…" Fiona asked.

"That'll be $49.99" Donkey requested, handing the man a jar of Shrek's farts.

"There's many more where that came from" Donkey lauged.

"Hey wait a minute. I don't want this crap" the guy said, giving it back to Donkey and taking his money.

"Huh?" Donkey asked.

"Yeah fuck Shrek." Another man agreed.

"Did you mean that literally? Because we get a lot of requests for that" Donkey guessed.

"No, it's just…Shrek isn't funny anymore, I don't know. I'm just tired of him" the man said.

"What, this was all different an hour ago" Donkey aid, screachintg his head.

"Well that was before Shrek memes invaded iFunny. Now it's not funny anymore" the man explained.

"Yeah now the normies are posting about him like 10 times a day. It just isn't funny anymore. It's like Finebros memes except those were never funny" another explained.

The crowd left Shrek's swamp, disinterested because of his new presence on iFunny. Shrek and the Haikuers stood at the edge of the swamp as they watched the crowd run away.

"Thanks everyone. I owe you one" Shrek thanked.

"Anything for you, Shrek" Kirby smiled.

"But wait, I still don't get what happened to Mike?" Jake noticed.

Mike walked into the scene, his face dark green. He groaned as he walked into the center of everyone. He had a very large stomach. He fell to the ground, vomiting. He extended his legs and a Shrekling pooped out of his asshole.

"Wow" Jp exclaimed.

"Oh, that was my bad. Forgot to use a condom" Shrek shrugged.

"That's our Shrek" Berserker said.

Everyone laughed as Mike puked some more and his Shrekling baby cried.

Everyone boarded the plane. The Jacob Team was enjoyning it in the first calss eatoing calzones and onions in celebration.

"Another win thanks to me" Sam cheered.

"Hey Sam" J greeted.

"Whoa hey no faggots allowed near me bro :/" Sam said.

J killed himself.

Nicholas, Reu, Mike, and Jake were playing Smash on their NEW! Nintendo 3DS. Jake was kicking their asses.

"Better run for the hills track boy" Jake taunted to Mike.

"I don't see what that has to do with anything..." Mike dismissed.

"TAKE IT DK" Jake shouted.

Mike shook his 3DS in his hands and puked over it.

"Link's ready for a comeback right now…" Reu said.

"mm" Jake said.

"You know Peach you can protect your boyfriend if you want" Reu dissed.

"Hm, really funny" Nicholas said.

"Seriously, what level are you? WHAT LEVEL ARE YOU?!" Reu screamed.

Jake won the match and Mike and Reu cried like bitches.

"YES" Jake declared, going in for a kiss with Nick, but Nick pushed him away.

"Hey! What are you doing?" Nick asked.

"I…" Jake paused.

"You're no match for my mouth" Nick said, taking Jake's pants off and sucking his dick.

"Oh" Reu said, shutting his 3ds and walking away, as did Mike.

[Reu in le confession toilet]  
"I'm still upset about Caesar. He did give me the last of his hamon though. Maybe I am the JoJo incarnation he was talking about…. I HOPE"  
[le end]

Reu walked by J, who was hanging from a noose in the middle of the room.

"Hey J, quit hanging around" Reu ordered.

J's noose broke and he fell on the ground, gasping for air.

"What was that all about?" Reu asked.

"Just practicing how long I can go without breathing to help me with my swimming capabilities." J explained.

"Oh ok. Maybe it'll be safer if you stick your head in the toilet though" Reu suggested.

"OMG Good idea! I'll try that. I'm going to learn to breathe underwater so it'll be as if I have gills. Because water is cool." J explained.

"Cool" Reu said, walking away.

"I'll have the best underwater breathing time of any haikuer, or my name isn't Jonah Joseph Cole" J shouted.

Reu paused, turning back to J.

"Wait, Jonah Joseph?" Reu asked.

"J…J…" Reu thought.

"Yeah that's my name haha I like putting all of my information upfront to my internet pals what's the worst that could happen" J shrugged.

"J, do you ever feel…different from the other kids?" Reu asked.

"Yeah, a little. Probably because I'm gay as fuck." J admitted.

"NO I mean, do you have powers?" Reu asked.

"Sometimes I wish I had a death note so I could write down the names of all of my enemies and brutally crucify them all. If I had a weapon I would go with a scythe, or ooo maybe a runic blade I LOVE THOSE x3!" J explained.

"J I think we should talk some more" Reu said, taking a seat next to him.

Mike was flushing his demonic shrekling down the toilet. It screamed in terror and coughed out blood as it squeezed down the drain. Mike walked out of the bathroom covered in ogre puke and toilet water, hearing the weeps of a haikuer nearby. He looked up to the ventilation system and noticed Cloud in there, crying.

"Cloud o3o?" Mike asked.

"No, this is cuck, not Cloud" Cloud called out before falling out of the vent and landing next to Mike.

"Why you being a bish -3-" Mike asked.

"Shut up Mike. You're good at everything. Speed running, completionism, fighting games. Smash was the one thing I could best you in, and I still lost somehow. I can't believe it. Smash is the only thing I'm good at and I fucked up. Now what am I going to do" Cloud sighed.

"I suck" Mike said.

"NO you don't Mike, you're great at everything, shut up" Cloud complained.

[Cloud in le confession toilet]  
"Besides, like, social skills, but who cares about that]  
[le end]

"Well, I never made the track team…" Mike rubbed his arm shyly.

Cloud turned around, stunned by Mike's words.

"You…you didn't make the…I mean, I made the track team…" Cloud said.

"I know but…" Mike tried to say.

"It was a no cut thing" Mike explained.

Mike looked Cloud dead in the eyes.

"There IS a cut." Mike said seriously.

"Perhaps…I could help you, make, the track team." Cloud whispered to Mike's ear, licking it.

"Attention all Troll Slaiyers, report to the elimination chamber in 5 minutes shitheads" Admin announced over the intercum.

Cloud left Mike.

[Cloud in le confession toilet]  
"Yeah I've been on the track team. Got some medals out of it too. Because I was just that good. Now that I think of it, I guess that means I actually am as epict as I thougth "  
[le end]

Some of the Troll Slaiyers were already in the elimination chamber, discussing who deserved the boot while sitting on the bleachers.

"I gotta say, wasn't impressed by Cloud's performance today. Really let us down forgetting his ump" Rydli said.

"gay" Carz added.

"And Joe, she had the game in her grasp, and she dropped the ball. We could have had it if it wasn't for her being distracted" Rydli continued.

"gay" Carz added.

"And what about that Grenade faggot. He's such a fat fuck all he seems to do is take up space" Grenade brought up.

"gay" Carz added.

"Yes Carz, he is also gay" Grenade agreed.

"You know who else we should worry about?" Rydli thought.

"gay?" Carz wondered.

"Marrowsky. Between us three dudes, truly the top of the haiku guys hierarchy, I think Marrowsky is a threat. We've seen his close connection with J. Sure the numbers may not matter now but soon enough once they're on the same side and can vote together we are in danger my friends. Not to mention a love interest from the other team could also mean someone is purposely throwing challenges" Rydli said.

"You think Marrowsky might be throwing challenges?" Grenade asked.

"At the moment? No. But we saw it happen with Stickboy on the other team, there's no knowing when it could happen here. Either way, a relationship that spans across the teams is surely dangerous and we should be cautious of anyone in cahoots with a Team Jacob" Rydli suggested.

Carz remained quiet.

"Wow. So if I don't have a girl I'm a loser, and if I do I'm a menace to the team. That fucking sucks." Grenade admitted.

"Grenade, Grenade, don't worry. You weren't going to get any girlfriends anyways" Rydli insisted.

The other Haikuers stared to TROLL their way right in. Mr. Moogle walked in in full Shrek gear, wearing an ogre hat with Shrek's ears on the side, green face paint, Shrek's outfit, holding two "Shrek" flags in his hands, and carrying an onion to eat.

"SHREAK" Moogle screamed.

"Moogle what are you doing?" Pantz asked.

"I've come to appreciate Shrek. I did in 2001 and I do today as well. I am and will forever be a broger" Mr. Moogle proclaimed.

"Shrek's outdated now, man." Jp said.

"What?" Mr. Moogle asked, lowering his flags.

"Yeah, iFunny found the meme and now they post about it 10 times a day so it isn't funny anymore" Jp explained.

"Really?" Mr. Moogle asked as everyone else took their seats.

"Are you crying?" Marrowsky asked as he took a seat next to Moogle.

"It's the onions" Mr. Moogle cried, shoving the onion in his mouth.

"Welcome, Troll Slaiyers, to yet, another, elimination ceremony. I have 12 Mountain Dew Code Red cans before me. That's enough for all but one of you to enjoy. One of you will not receive the can of mountain dew, will be dropped OUT of the plane, taking the drop of shame, and being stranded in this mythological location…forever…well I mean you'll be eliminated forever, you'll probably find a way home eventually, you know, maybe" Admin shrugged.

"Where exactly is Far Far Away in relation to the U.S.?" Rydli asked.

"Beats me" Admin shrugged.

[Marrowsky in le confession toilet]  
"If there's one good thing about losing it's the Code Red."  
[le end]

The Haikuers all exchanged glances as Admin cleared his throat, beginning the ceremony.

"So, safe tonight, we have Element, Rydli, Jp, Pantz, and Pseudonym" Admin began, calling out their names and tossing a can to each one.

Carz, Grenade, Cloud, Joe, Kirby, Marrowsky Mr. Moogle, and StarForce were left.

"Next up, we got Marrowsky, Mr. Moogle, StarForce, Kirby, aaaaaaaaand Grenade" Admin continued.

Each of them smiled as they received their symbol of immunity. Carz, Cloud, and Joe were left.

"Really niggers?" Cloud asked his team.

"It's the" Carz began.

"Hey wait what did I do?" Joe complained.

"Cloud, you are safe for the night" Admin said, passing him his mountain dew.

"Good, now I can go ignore everything you guys say for the next 72 hours and then only pay attention when the next elimination ceremony is going on" Cloud said, laying back and taking a nap.

Carz and Joe were left.

"Joe, you made it to the final two in the challenge today, and then blew it when you got distracted during your most important moment. You've also been pretty quiet and distant lately, not communicating much with your teammates. Carz on the other hand, is Carz." Admin explained.

Joe held her hands together, staring at the last Mountain Dew can and sweating. Carz started jacking off. Sweat fell from Joe's face and she gritted her teeth, not twitching as Admin picked up the final can. Carz took his pants off. Joe closed her eyes in intimidation as Admin opened his mouth to deliver the final line. Carz moaned.

"The final Mountain Dew Code Red can goes….to…" Admin began.

Joe pulled her hair nervously, her heart beating fast. Carz heart beated fast as he beated himself.

"Carz." Admin finished, passing it to Carz, which he came into.

"Sorry, Julie. Your time is up." Admin sadly said, motioning his hands to direct her toward the dor.

"WHAT. Guys, please! I promise, if you keep me here I'll double my lines per episode from 5 to 10! Come on!" Joe pleaded.

"Sorry Julie…" Kirby sadly waved goodbye.

"Ta-da-la~" Rydli dickishly waved with a smile.

"Guys, please, wait, I'm actually relevant again. I started posting more, and, look, we have Haiku Avenue to look forward to. All kinds of new ships are in the process! DON"T MAKE ME LEAVE!" Joe pleaded.

Imboo picked Joe up and carried her toward the exit, strapping a parachute on to her.

"I'll miss you Joe! But don't worry, I'll win it for you! Our secret alliance that we had will live on and make it to the end!" Jp yelled to her from across the room.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! WHATGA BOU? MY DICK" Joe screamed as Imboo threw her out the plane, where she plummeted towards the ground.

"Should have ganoncided her" Cloud suggested.

[Element in le confession toilet]  
"Oh well nothing of value was lost."  
[le end]

"I'm gonna miss Ziggy…" StarForce sadly pouted.

The Troll Slaiyers began to disperse, going to their prison cells to sleep.

"And then there were 25." Admin called out.

Gingerale was playing with Garchomp Jesus

"You're a good little Gar Gar aren't you" Gingerale said, lovingly rubbing the Garhcomps belly.

"Gar~" Gar said, chomping on Gingerale's crotch.

Gingerale jumped up and scolded the Garchomp.

"What did I say about trying to bite my dick off! No! No biting my dick off! I need that to reproduce!" Gingerale yelled at it.

The Garchomp winced and put its head on the ground.

"Ok maybe you can bite it off a little bit" Gingerale rolled his eyes.

The Garchomp squealed joyously.

Isaac walked up to Gingerale, taking a seat next to him.

"Hey Gingerale" Isaac greeted.

"Oh, hey Isaac. Ahem. ISacc,a sthey say?!" Gingerale said.

"So, you were going to have your cock vore party, right?" Isaac asked him, looking around.

"Oh, yeah, nobody has showed up yet, but I'm sure they will soon…" Gingerale said, looking around to see everyone else too busy masturbating or skateboarding. Or both.

"Want me to join you for your cock vore party?" Isaac asked.

"Well I mean, you don't have to, they're all going to show up. They're just tied up at the moment. They're coming…stuck in traffic probably" Gingerale guessed.

"Alright" Isaac said, standing up and leaving.

"Wait, actually…Isaac." Gingerale called out.

"Yeah?" Isaac asked back.

"You can, stay, if you want…" Gingerale said.

"Sure" Isaac smiled, and the two and Garchomp played with dildos all night.

Lemon was getting a soda from the mini fridge, closing the door and seeing Nicholas standing right next to it.

"Hello, Lemon." Nicholas greeted.

"Oh, hey Nick" Lemon nervously replied, taking a swig of his Diet Pepsi, the soda for people with bad taste.

"So, Lemon. That was a strange move you made back there, when you swung your hammer at me, and knocked me off the stage. And made me lose." Nicholas reminded him.

"What's all that white stuff on your face?" Lemon asked.

"Answer the question!" Nicholas demanded.

"Oh, that was you? I thought that was Reu. You know, me and Reu haha. We just love hitting each other with hammers" Lemon explained.

Lemon reached for a hammer out of his back pocket and flung it at Reu's head, knocking Reu to the ground.

"GODDAMIT LEMON" Reu screamed as blood rushed out of his head.

"Oh, I see. Interesting. You like eliminating your teammates from challenges, huh?" Nicholas asked him.

"No, it's just, that, uh, I, wasn't sure what was going on. So many people moving at once. I lost track of who was who. You were just blabbing on and I forgot you were on my team I guess? Ok no wait I worded that badly, I-"

"It's fine, Lemon. Just wanted some clarification. I'll, see you around Lemon" Nicholas said, and Lemon walked away.

Nicholas will remember that.

Shrek was relaxing outside of his swamp, looking up at the night sky and enjoying some nice peace anf quiet.

"Ah, this is the life" Shrek said, closing his eyes and putting his arms behind his back as he sunk further into his mud bath.

Not a single human soul was within miles, with the exception for once. One that approached Shrek slowly. Riding his Segway, the individual closed the distance between him and Shrek, riding across the mud and approaching Shrek's house. Shrek opened his eyes as he heard the wheels scrape against the mud.

"Oh for the love of" Shrek rolled his eyes.

Paul Blart arrived at the foot of the mud bath, getting off his Segway and detaching his safety helmet. He took his shades off and put them in his pocket, and walked up next to Shrek.

"Are you the one they call Shrek?" Paul Blart asked.

"That's my name don't ware it out" Shrek said, farting and burping.

"Duty calls. I was approached by a little boy he needed my help. And it turns out he needs your help too, 'ol man" Paul Blart explained.

"Look, get out of my swamp. I'm busy here. Relaxing. I'm on vacation" Shrek brushed off.

"Duty doesn't take a vacation." Paul Blart answered seriously.

"I'll show you some duty" Shrek said, pooping.

"Look, Shrek. I know where you are coming from. I am a man who wants nothing more than to protect his home. I wanted to protect the malls I could, but now I realize there is a bigger mall out there that needs our help. And that mall is called Planet Earth. Just like your swamp, Shrek. If you come with me, we will be protecting swamps all over the globe." Paul Blart explained.

Shrek sighed, getting out of the bath and grabbing a towel.

"I'm in it for the kids. I have a wife to protect. And nothing will come in my way. Whatever force is out there, you can count on my help to stop it." Shrek said.

Blart smiled. Then Donkey came running out of the house.

"SHREK. SHREK?! SOMEONE IS INFILTRATING THE SWAMP" Donkey screamed, kicking Blart with his hind legs and sending him flying into the mud bath.

"Why does this keep happening to me?" Blart asked.

Back on the plane, Blooberri was walking down the corridor toward the bathroom when she saw Carz pop out from the shadows.

"Oh, hey Carz. How's it going?" Blooberri asked.

"My wife…" Carz said, looking at her straight in the eyes.

Blooberri smiled. Carz' gaze dropped and he frowned.

"You ok Carz?" Blooberri asked.

Carz walked past her, refusing to face her.

"I'm gay" Carz stated.

"You feeling alright?" Blooberri asked again, holding a look of concern.

"Tito Dickman. Is my waifu. Carzberri. Death." Carz said, facing the wall.

"What? Carz are you…asking for a divorce?" Blooberri asked, stunned.

"I'm sorry" Carz spoke quietly, walking away from Blooberri before she could emit any reaction. Carz kept his face down as he walked back toward his team. Blooberri stood in disbelief as she watched Carz walk away. Her mouth kept slightly opened and her expression remained blank, she paused for a long moment and just soaked in the information. Blooberri watched the wall with a vacant look.

End of Day 435

Initiation at 36.84%

18-26-13-18 / 8-18 / 13-4-18-18


End file.
